Essentials: How Humans Select & Keep Romantic Partners in the Short & Long Term | Dr. David Buss
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
Welcome to Huberman Lab Essentials, where we revisit past episodes for the most potent and actionable science-based tools for mental health, physical health, and performance.
欢迎来到 Huberman Lab Essentials，在这里我们回顾过去的剧集，寻找针对心理健康、身体健康和表现的最有效、最可操作的基于科学的工具。
I'm Andrew Huberman, and I'm a professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford School of Medicine.
我是安德鲁·胡伯曼，斯坦福大学医学院神经生物学和眼科教授。
And now, my conversation with Dr. David Buss.
现在，我与大卫·巴斯博士的对话。
Well, David, delighted to be here.
好吧，大卫，很高兴来到这里。
Excited to ask you a number of questions about these super interesting topics about how people select mates.
很高兴向您询问一些有关人们如何选择伴侣的超级有趣主题的问题。
Just to start off, perhaps you could just orient us a little bit about mate choice, some of the primary criteria that studies show men and women use in order to select mates, transient mates as well as lifetime mates.
首先，也许您可以向我们介绍一些关于择偶的知识，研究表明男性和女性在选择配偶、短暂配偶以及终生配偶时使用一些主要标准。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Right.
对。
Well, that's a critical distinction because what people look for in a long-term, committed mateship, like a marriage partner or a long-term romantic relationship, is different from what people look for in a hookup or casual sex.
嗯，这是一个关键的区别，因为人们在长期、忠诚的伴侣关系中寻找的东西，比如婚姻伴侣或长期的浪漫关系，与人们在勾搭或随意性行为中寻找的东西不同。
So that's actually critical.
所以这实际上很关键。
I wonder if we could maybe just back up a second and just talk a little bit about the theoretical framework for understanding mate choice.
我想知道我们是否可以退一步，谈谈理解择偶的理论框架。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
Sure.
当然。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
It basically stems from Darwin's theory of sexual selection.
它基本上源于达尔文的性选择理论。
Darwin noticed that there were phenomena that couldn't be explained by the so-called survival selection.
达尔文注意到有些现象无法用所谓的生存选择来解释。
So he came up with the theory of sexual selection, which deals not with the evolution of characteristics due to their survival advantage, but rather due to their mating advantage.
因此，他提出了性选择理论，该理论涉及的不是由于生存优势而导致的特征进化，而是由于交配优势而导致的特征进化。
And he identified two causal processes by which mating advantage could occur.
他还发现了两个可能产生交配优势的因果过程。
One is intrasexual competition, and the logic was whatever qualities led to success in these same-sex battles, those qualities get passed on in greater numbers, and so you see evolution, which is change over time, and increase in frequency of the characteristics associated with winning these, what Darwin called contest competition.
一种是性内竞争，其逻辑是在这些同性斗争中导致成功的任何品质，这些品质都会被更多的人传递，所以你会看到进化，它随着时间的推移而变化，并且与赢得这些品质相关的特征的频率增加，达尔文称之为竞争竞争。
And we know that the logic of that is more general now and involves things like, in our species, competing for position and status hierarchies.
我们知道，现在的逻辑更加普遍，涉及到诸如在我们物种中争夺位置和地位等级之类的事情。
But the second most relevant to your question about mate choice is preferential mate choice.
但与你的择偶问题最相关的第二个是优先择偶。
That was the second causal pathway, and the logic there is that if members of one sex agree with one another about the qualities that are desired, then those of the opposite sex who possess the desired qualities or embody those desired qualities, they have a mating advantage.
这是第二条因果路径，其中的逻辑是，如果一种性别的成员在所需的品质上达成一致，那么那些拥有所需品质或体现这些所需品质的异性，他们就拥有交配优势。
Those lacking desired qualities get banished, shunned, ignored, or, in the modern environment, become incels.
那些缺乏所需品质的人会被驱逐、回避、忽视，或者在现代环境中，成为非自愿者。
The logic there is very simple, but also very powerful, and that is that whatever qualities are desired, consensually desired, if there's some heritable basis to those, then those increase in frequency over time.
其中的逻辑非常简单，但也非常强大，那就是，无论需要什么品质，只要双方都愿意，如果这些品质有一些可遗传的基础，那么这些品质的频率会随着时间的推移而增加。
And in the human case, these two causal processes of sexual selection are related to each other in that the mate preferences of one sex basically set the ground rules for competition in the opposite sex.
就人类而言，性选择的这两个因果过程是相互关联的，因为一种性别的择偶偏好基本上为异性竞争设定了基本规则。
So if, for example, hypothetically, women preferred to mate with men who were able and willing to devote resources to them, then that would create competition among men to claw their way and beat out other men in resource acquisition, and then displaying their willingness to commit that to a particular woman.
因此，假设女性更愿意与有能力且愿意为她们投入资源的男性交配，那么男性之间就会产生竞争，在资源获取方面抢占先机并击败其他男性，然后表现出她们愿意将资源奉献给特定女性。
So that's sort of a little bit of theoretical backdrop.
这就是一些理论背景。
So you asked, well, what are the qualities that men and women desire?
所以你问，男人和女人渴望的品质是什么？
And maybe we'll start with long-term mating and then shift to short-term mating.
也许我们会从长期交配开始，然后转向短期交配。
The most large-scale study that's been done on this is a study that I did a while back of 37 different cultures, and it's now been replicated by other researchers.
对此进行的最大规模的研究是我不久前对 37 种不同文化进行的一项研究，现在已被其他研究人员复制。
But basically what we found is three clusters of things.
但基本上我们发现的是三组东西。
We found qualities that both men and women wanted in a long-term mate.
我们发现了男性和女性都希望长期伴侣具备的品质。
We found some qualities that were sex differentiated, where women preferred them more than men, or men preferred them more than women.
我们发现一些品质是有性别差异的，女性比男性更喜欢这些品质，或者男性比女性更喜欢这些品质。
And then we found some attributes that were highly variable across cultures in whether people found these as desirable or indispensable or irrelevant.
然后我们发现一些属性在不同文化中差异很大，人们认为这些属性是可取的、不可或缺的还是无关紧要的。
So if you talk about universal desires, so things that men and women share, things like intelligence, kindness, mutual attraction and love, good health, dependability, emotional stability, although there's a bit of a sex difference there with women preferring it a bit more than men.
所以，如果你谈论普遍的欲望，那么男人和女人共有的东西，比如聪明、善良、相互吸引和爱、身体健康、可靠、情绪稳定，尽管存在一些性别差异，女性比男性更喜欢这些。
So you go to anywhere in the world, and these are qualities that people universally desire in long-term mates.
所以无论你去世界任何地方，这些都是人们普遍渴望长期伴侣具备的品质。
Sex differences.
性别差异。
So sex differences basically fell into two clusters.
所以性别差异基本上分为两类。
So women more than men prioritized good earning capacity, slightly older age, and the qualities associated with resource acquisition.
因此，女性比男性更看重良好的赚钱能力、稍大的年龄以及与资源获取相关的品质。
So these are things like a man's social status.
这些都是像男人的社会地位这样的东西。
Does he have drive?
他有动力吗？
Is he ambitious?
他有野心吗？
Does he have a good long-term resource trajectory is one way that I like to phrase it, because women often, they don't look at necessarily the resources that a guy possesses at this moment, but what is his trajectory?
他是否拥有良好的长期资源轨迹是我喜欢表达的一种方式，因为女性通常并不一定会关注一个男人此时此刻拥有的资源，但他的轨迹是什么？
Women attend to the attention structure.
女性关注注意力结构。
So the attention structure is a key determinant of status.
所以注意力结构是地位的关键决定因素。
So those people who are high in status are those to whom the most people pay the most attention.
所以那些地位高的人，也是最受人们关注的人。
Hard work, ambition.
努力工作，有野心。
Does he have clear goals, or is he in an existential crisis not knowing what he's going to do with his life?
他是否有明确的目标，或者他是否正面临生存危机，不知道自己要做什么？
Also, women use what's called in the literature mate choice copying.
此外，女性还使用文献中所谓的择偶复制。
So we've done studies where you just take a guy, photograph him alone, versus take the same guy, put an attractive woman next to him, or put two women next to him, and women judge exactly the same guy to be much more attractive if he's paired with women.
所以我们做了研究，你只拍摄一个男人，单独拍摄他，而不是拍摄同一个人，在他旁边放一个有魅力的女人，或者在他旁边放两个女人，而女人会认为同一个男人与女人配对时会更具吸引力。
From an evolutionary perspective, it's reasonable that women would prioritize these qualities because of the tremendous asymmetry in our reproductive biology, namely that fertilization occurs internally within women.
从进化的角度来看，女性优先考虑这些品质是合理的，因为我们的生殖生物学存在巨大的不对称性，即受精发生在女性体内。
Women bear the burdens of the nine-month pregnancy, which is metabolically expensive, as well as creating opportunity costs in terms of mobility and solving other tasks that people need to solve in the course of their lives.
女性承受着怀孕九个月的负担，这在新陈代谢上是昂贵的，并且在流动性和解决人们一生中需要解决的其他任务方面创造了机会成本。
And so, one way to phrase that is that the costs of making a bad mate choice are much heavier for women when it comes to sexual behavior, certainly, and the benefits correspondingly of making a wise mate choice are higher for women in the sexual context.
因此，一种说法是，在性行为方面，女性做出错误择偶的代价当然要沉重得多，而在性行为方面，做出明智择偶的好处相应地对女性来说更高。
But as I said, we have mutual mate choice in our species.
但正如我所说，我们这个物种有共同的择偶选择。
And so what do men value more than women?
那么男人比女人更看重什么？
Physical attractiveness.
身体吸引力。
So physical appearance provides a wealth of information about a person's health status, but also provides for men a wealth of information about a woman's fertility, her reproductive value.
因此，外貌提供了有关一个人健康状况的丰富信息，也为男性提供了有关女性生育能力和生殖价值的丰富信息。
Now, not that men think about that consciously.
现在，男人并没有有意识地思考这个问题。
Men don't walk down the street and see a woman and think, "Oh, I find her attractive because I think she must be very fertile." They just find those cues attractive.
男人不会走在街上，看到一个女人，然后想：“哦，我发现她很有吸引力，因为我认为她一定很有生育能力。”他们只是觉得这些线索很有吸引力。
We know now, based on the last 20 years of scientific studies, that the cues that men find attractive in women are not at all arbitrary.
根据过去 20 年的科学研究，我们现在知道，男性认为女性有吸引力的暗示并不是任意的。
Things like clear skin, clear eyes, symmetrical features, a low waist-to-hip ratio, full lips, lustrous hair, all these are qualities that are associated with youth and health and hence have evolved to be part of our standards of attractiveness.
干净的皮肤、清澈的眼睛、对称的五官、低腰臀比、丰满的嘴唇、有光泽的头发，所有这些都是与年轻和健康相关的品质，因此已经演变成为我们吸引力标准的一部分。
And so it's not just that men are these superficial creatures who evaluate women on the basis of appearance.
所以，不仅仅是男人是根据外表来评价女人的肤浅生物。
There's an underlying logic to why they do so.
他们这样做有一个潜在的逻辑。
And as I said, relative youth, this age thing is one of the largest sex differences you find in long-term mate selection, with women preferring somewhat older men and men preferring somewhat younger women.
正如我所说，相对年轻，年龄问题是长期择偶过程中发现的最大性别差异之一，女性更喜欢年长的男性，而男性则更喜欢年轻的女性。
It's also expressed in preferences.
它也体现在偏好上。
So say a 25-year-old man would, say, prefer a woman who's 20 or in her early 20s.
比如说，一个 25 岁的男人会喜欢一个 20 岁或 20 岁出头的女人。
35-year-old man might prefer a woman who's in her late 20s or early 30s.
35 岁的男性可能更喜欢 20 岁左右或 30 岁出头的女性。
50-year-old man might prefer a woman who's, say, 35 to 38.
50 岁的男人可能更喜欢 35 到 38 岁的女人。
So marriage and long-term mating are things other than reproductive unions in the modern environment.
因此，婚姻和长期交配在现代环境中与生殖联盟不同。
And if you get too large an age gap, then essentially you're in different cultures.
如果你们的年龄差距太大，那么本质上你们就处于不同的文化之中。
And if the cultural gap gets too large, you don't understand each other.
如果文化差距太大，你们就无法相互理解。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
I'd like to take a quick break and acknowledge one of our sponsors, LMNT.
我想稍微休息一下并感谢我们的赞助商之一 LMNT。
LMNT is an electrolyte drink that has everything you need and nothing you don't.
LMNT 是一种电解质饮料，拥有您需要的一切，没有您不需要的东西。
That means the electrolytes, sodium, magnesium, and potassium in the correct amounts, but no sugar.
这意味着电解质、钠、镁和钾的含量正确，但不含糖。
Proper hydration is critical for optimal brain and body function.
适当的水合作用对于大脑和身体的最佳功能至关重要。
Even a slight degree of dehydration can diminish cognitive and physical performance.
即使是轻微程度的脱水也会降低认知和身体表现。
It's also important that you get adequate electrolytes.
获得充足的电解质也很重要。
The electrolytes, sodium, magnesium, and potassium, are vital for functioning of all the cells in your body, especially your neurons or your nerve cells.
电解质（钠、镁和钾）对于体内所有细胞（尤其是神经元或神经细胞）的功能至关重要。
Drinking LMNT dissolved in water makes it very easy to ensure that you're getting adequate hydration and adequate electrolytes.
饮用溶解在水中的 LMNT 可以很容易地确保您获得足够的水分和电解质。
To make sure that I'm getting proper amounts of hydration and electrolytes, I dissolve one packet of LMNT in about 16 to 32 ounces of water when I first wake up in the morning, and I drink that basically first thing in the morning.
为了确保我获得适量的水合作用和电解质，当我早上第一次醒来时，我将一包 LMNT 溶解在大约 16 至 32 盎司的水中，并且我基本上早上第一件事就是喝它。
I'll also drink LMNT dissolved in water during any kind of physical exercise that I'm doing, especially on hot days when I'm sweating a lot and losing water and electrolytes.
我还会在进行任何体育锻炼时饮用溶解在水中的 LMNT，尤其是在炎热的日子里，当我大量出汗并失去水和电解质时。
LMNT has a bunch of great-tasting flavors.
LMNT 有很多美味的口味。
I love the raspberry.
我喜欢覆盆子。
I love the citrus flavor.
我喜欢柑橘味。
Right now, LMNT has a limited edition lemonade flavor that is absolutely delicious.
现在LMNT推出了限量版柠檬水口味，绝对美味。
I hate to say that I love one more than all the others, but this lemonade flavor is right up there with my favorite other one, which is raspberry or watermelon.
我不想说我比其他所有口味都更喜欢其中一种，但这种柠檬水口味与我最喜欢的另一种口味（覆盆子或西瓜）不相上下。
Again, I can't pick just one flavor.
再说一次，我不能只选择一种口味。
I love them all.
我爱他们所有人。
If you'd like to try LMNT, you can go to drinklmnt.com/huberman, spelled drinklmnt.com/huberman, to claim a free LMNT sample pack with a purchase of any LMNT drink mix.
如果您想尝试 LMNT，可以访问 Drinklmnt.com/huberman（拼写为 Drinklmnt.com/huberman），购买任意 LMNT 混合饮料即可领取免费 LMNT 样品包。
Again, that's drinklmnt.com/huberman to claim a free sample pack.
再次强调，请访问 Drinklmnt.com/huberman 索取免费样品包。
Could you tell us about how men and women leverage deception versus truth-telling and communicating some of the things around mate choice selection?
您能否告诉我们男人和女人如何利用欺骗与说真话以及沟通有关择偶选择的一些事情？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Yeah.
是的。
Well, so basically, both men and women do deceive.
嗯，基本上，男人和女人都会欺骗。
So we have the modern cultural invention of online dating.
所以我们有了在线约会的现代文化发明。
People do lie, but they lie in predictable ways.
人们确实会撒谎，但他们撒谎的方式是可以预见的。
They lie in ways that attempt to embody the mate preferences of the person they're trying to attract.
他们撒谎的方式试图体现他们想要吸引的人的择偶偏好。
Both sexes post photos that are not truly representative of what they actually look like.
男女发布的照片都不能真正代表他们的实际样子。
So they might post photos of themselves when they were younger, or there are even advice tips on how to create the best selfie of the best angle that will maximally enhance what you look like.
因此，他们可能会发布自己年轻时的照片，或者甚至会提供有关如何以最佳角度拍摄最佳自拍照的建议，以最大程度地增强您的外观。
What happens with internet dating is that the photograph tends to overwhelm all the other cues, and all the other cues are written statements, and we weren't really evolved to process written statements.
网络约会的情况是，照片往往会压倒所有其他线索，而所有其他线索都是书面陈述，而我们并没有真正进化到处理书面陈述。
But we were evolved to respond to physical cues, and men tend to attend to the visual cues much more than women.
但我们的进化是为了对身体暗示做出反应，而男性比女性更容易关注视觉暗示。
So women in their mate selection, they have olfactory cues, so what does the guy sound like?
所以女性在择偶时，她们有嗅觉线索，那么这个男人听起来是什么样的呢？
His vocal qualities, that's auditory cues, but olfactory cues, what does he smell like?
他的声音品质，这是听觉线索，但嗅觉线索，他闻起来像什么？
If the guy doesn't smell right, even if he embodies all the other qualities women want, that's a deal breaker.
如果这个男人闻起来不对劲，即使他体现了女人想要的所有其他品质，这也是一个大问题。
And so I encourage people just Stop with the hundred texts back and forth or messaging, and meet a person for a cup of coffee.
因此，我鼓励人们停止数百条来回的短信或消息，去见一个人喝杯咖啡。
And then, of course, some qualities you can't assess even with a half-hour interaction.
当然，有些品质即使通过半小时的互动也无法评估。
You can tell a lot, but things like emotional stability, which is absolutely critical in long-term mating, is to do something like go on a trip together, take a vacation, and where you're even in an unfamiliar environment, where you have to cope with things that you're not familiar with.
你可以说很多，但是像情绪稳定这样的事情，对于长期的交配来说绝对是至关重要的，就是一起去旅行，一起去度假，甚至在一个陌生的环境中，你必须应对一些你不熟悉的事情。
And one of the hallmarks of emotional instability is how they respond to stress.
情绪不稳定的标志之一是他们对压力的反应。
And so this is the sort of information you can't get on a coffee date.
所以这是你在咖啡约会中无法获得的信息。
You can only get by assessing it over time.
你只能通过一段时间的评估来获得。
So one form of deception which we haven't mentioned is deception about whether you're interested in a long-term, committed relationship or a short-term hookup.
因此，我们没有提到的一种欺骗形式是欺骗你是否对长期、忠诚的关系或短期的勾搭感兴趣。
The overt display that, "Hey, I'm interested in just a short-term hookup.
公开表明，“嘿，我只对短期交往感兴趣。
I'm interested in sex, so I want to have sex right now.
我对性很感兴趣，所以我现在就想发生性行为。
Let's just go back to my apartment." These are very ineffective tactics.
我们还是回我的公寓吧。”这些都是非常无效的策略。
So we find in our studies of deception that men tend to exaggerate how similar they are and how aligned they are in their values and religious orientations and political values and so forth.
因此，我们在欺骗研究中发现，男人倾向于夸大他们在价值观、宗教取向和政治价值观等方面的相似度和一致性。
And I think that's probably an evolutionarily recurrent form of deception that women have defenses against.
我认为这可能是一种在进化上反复出现的欺骗形式，女性对此有防御能力。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
We talked a little bit about mate choice, but in terms of sexual partner choice, are there any good studies exploring what people are selecting for?
我们讨论了一些关于择偶的问题，但就性伴侣的选择而言，是否有任何好的研究来探索人们的选择是什么？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
We know something about how the preferences for a sex partner differ from preference for a long-term mate.
我们知道对性伴侣的偏好与对长期伴侣的偏好有何不同。
There is overlap, of course, but one thing is physical appearance.
当然，有重叠之处，但有一件事是外表。
So physical appearance for women becomes more important in short-term mating.
因此，女性的外表在短期交配中变得更加重要。
So those physical attributes are more important for women.
所以这些身体特征对于女性来说更为重要。
They remain important for men, physical appearance, in short-term mating, but with the footnote that men are willing to drop their standards in short-term mating if it's low commitment, low risk, just sex without entangling commitments.
在短期交配中，它们对于男性、外貌仍然很重要，但脚注是，如果短期交配是低承诺、低风险、只是性行为而没有纠缠承诺，那么男性愿意放弃短期交配的标准。
Women are more likely to prioritize what I call bad boy qualities, guys who are a little arrogant, guys who are risk-taking.
女性更有可能优先考虑我所说的坏男孩品质，有点傲慢的男人，敢于冒险的男人。
Women are more attracted to those guys in short-term mating than long-term mating, whereas in long-term mating, they go more for the good dad qualities.
在短期交配中，女性比长期交配中更容易被那些男人吸引，而在长期交配中，她们更看重好爸爸的品质。
Is this guy dependable?
这家伙可靠吗？
Is he going to be a good father to my children?
他会成为我孩子们的好父亲吗？
In short-term mating, women use that mate copying heuristic.
在短期交配中，女性会使用配偶复制启发法。
That is, if there are thousands of other women who find him attractive, women find him attractive.
也就是说，如果有成千上万的其他女性觉得他有吸引力，那么女性也会觉得他有吸引力。
And so that's why you have the groupie phenomenon.
这就是为什么会有追星族现象。
If you took a still photo of some of these rock stars and asked women how attractive the guy is versus tell them he's a famous rock star and show the thousands of women screaming at him, they judge him entirely differently.
如果你给其中一些摇滚明星拍一张静态照片，然后问女性这个家伙有多有吸引力，而不是告诉她们他是一位著名的摇滚明星，并向成千上万的女性对他尖叫，她们对他的评价完全不同。
This is just an illustration of how circumstance-dependent women's mate attraction is for guys.
这只是说明女性对男性的伴侣吸引力是如何取决于环境的。
It depends on his status, the number of women that are attracted to him, the attention structure, how he interacts with a puppy.
这取决于他的地位、被他吸引的女性数量、注意力结构、他与小狗的互动方式。
Whereas for men, it almost doesn't matter.
而对于男人来说，这几乎无关紧要。
Context is more irrelevant.
上下文更无关紧要。
They're honing in on the specific psychophysical cues that the woman is displaying, and context be damned.
他们正在研究这名女性所表现出的具体心理生理线索，而不管背景如何。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
We've known for a long time that there are things that we can do to improve our sleep, and that includes things that we can take, things like magnesium threonate, theanine, chamomile extract, and glycine, along with lesser-known things like saffron and valerian root.
我们很早就知道，我们可以采取一些措施来改善睡眠，其中包括我们可以服用的东西，例如苏糖酸镁、茶氨酸、洋甘菊提取物和甘氨酸，以及一些不太为人所知的物质，例如藏红花和缬草根。
These are all clinically supported ingredients that can help you fall asleep, stay asleep, and wake up feeling more refreshed.
这些都是经过临床支持的成分，可以帮助您入睡、保持睡眠状态，并且醒来时感觉更加神清气爽。
I'm excited to share that our longtime sponsor, AG1, just created a new product called AGZ, a nightly drink designed to help you get better sleep and have you wake up feeling super refreshed.
我很高兴与大家分享，我们的长期赞助商 AG1 刚刚创造了一款名为 AGZ 的新产品，这是一种夜间饮料，旨在帮助您获得更好的睡眠，让您醒来时感觉神清气爽。
Over the past few years, I've worked with the team at AG1 to help create this new AGZ formula.
在过去的几年里，我与 AG1 的团队合作，帮助创建了这个新的 AGZ 公式。
It has the best sleep-supporting compounds in exactly the right ratios in one easy-to-drink mix.
它在一种易于饮用的混合物中以完全正确的比例含有最好的睡眠支持化合物。
This removes all the complexity of trying to forage the vast landscape of supplements focused on sleep and figuring out the right dosages and which ones to take for you.
这消除了尝试寻找大量针对睡眠的补充剂以及确定正确剂量和适合您服用的补充剂的所有复杂性。
AGZ is, to my knowledge, the most comprehensive sleep supplement on the market.
据我所知，AGZ 是市场上最全面的睡眠补充剂。
I take it 30 to 60 minutes before sleep.
我在睡前 30 到 60 分钟服用。
It's delicious, by the way, and it dramatically increases both the quality and the depth of my sleep.
顺便说一句，它很美味，而且它极大地提高了我的睡眠质量和深度。
I know that both from my subjective experience of my sleep and because I track my sleep.
我知道这一点，既来自我对睡眠的主观体验，也因为我跟踪了我的睡眠。
I'm excited for everyone to try this new AGZ formulation and to enjoy the benefits of better sleep.
我很高兴每个人都能尝试这种新的 AGZ 配方并享受更好睡眠的好处。
AGZ is available in chocolate, chocolate mint, and mixed berry flavors.
AGZ 有巧克力、巧克力薄荷和混合浆果口味。
And as I mentioned before, they're all extremely delicious.
正如我之前提到的，它们都非常美味。
My favorite of the three has to be, I think, chocolate mint, but I really like them all.
我认为这三者中我最喜欢的是巧克力薄荷，但我真的很喜欢它们。
If you'd like to try AGZ, go to drinkagz.com/huberman to get a special offer.
如果您想尝试 AGZ，请访问 Drinkagz.com/huberman 以获得特别优惠。
Again, that's drinkagz.com/huberman.
再说一遍，这是 Drinkagz.com/huberman。
What's known about jealousy in men versus women?
关于男性和女性的嫉妒心，我们了解多少？
And we hear, or I've heard at some point that a large fraction of homicides are the consequence of jealous lovers.
我们听说，或者我曾经听说过，很大一部分凶杀案是恋人嫉妒的结果。
That's the darkest angle of all this, but in evolutionary psychology context, what is jealousy?
这是这一切中最黑暗的一面，但在进化心理学的背景下，什么是嫉妒？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Jealousy is an evolved emotion that serves several adaptive functions, okay?
嫉妒是一种进化而来的情绪，具有多种适应性功能，好吗？
Once you have long-term mating, you need a defense to prevent or preserve the investment that you've made or are making in the long-term mateship.
一旦你有了长期的伴侣关系，你就需要采取防御措施来防止或保留你在长期伴侣关系中已经做出或正在做出的投资。
And so jealousy serves this mate-guarding function, if you will, or mate retention function.
因此，嫉妒起到了保护配偶的作用（如果你愿意的话），或者说是保留配偶的功能。
And so jealousy gets activated when there are threats to that romantic relationship.
因此，当浪漫关系受到威胁时，嫉妒就会被激活。
The threats Come from many sources.
威胁来自很多方面。
So they could be, you detect cues to your partner's infidelity or cues of a lack of an emotional distance between you and your partner.
因此，您可能会发现伴侣不忠的迹象，或者您和伴侣之间缺乏情感距离的迹象。
So that's one set of cues.
这是一组线索。
But then there's another set of interested mate poachers.
但还有另一群感兴趣的配偶偷猎者。
So, if you're mated to someone who's desirable, which many people are, other people still desire them.
因此，如果你与一个令人向往的人结婚（很多人都是这样），其他人仍然会渴望他们。
So jealousy motivates people to be attentive to potential mate poachers.
因此，嫉妒会促使人们留意潜在的偷猎者。
Even if there are no mate poachers and no cues to infidelity, if a mate value discrepancy opens up in a relationship, so colloquially people say things like, "He's not good enough for you," or, "I think you could do better." So people implicitly have a notion of relative mate value and discrepancies therein.
即使没有偷猎者，也没有不忠的迹象，如果一段关系中出现了伴侣价值观的差异，人们就会通俗地说，“他配不上你”，或者“我认为你可以做得更好”。因此，人们隐含着相对配偶价值及其差异的概念。
Okay, but discrepancies can open up where none previously existed.
好的，但是以前不存在的差异可能会出现。
So you get fired from a job all of a sudden, and most people are very understanding and forgiving about that if it's not too long.
所以你突然被解雇了，如果时间不太长的话，大多数人都会非常理解和宽容。
But you go six months, eight months, people start having problems.
但六个月、八个月后，人们开始遇到问题。
Or if someone's career takes off, let's say a woman becomes a famous singer or actress, or a man does, career takes off, all of a sudden there's a mate value discrepancy where you have access to a larger pool of potential mates and higher mate value potential mates.
或者，如果某人的事业腾飞，假设一个女人成为了著名的歌手或演员，或者一个男人成为了著名的歌手或演员，或者一个男人，事业腾飞，突然之间就会出现择偶价值差异，你可以接触到更多的潜在伴侣和更高择偶价值的潜在伴侣。
So people are attentive to mate value discrepancies, and so jealousy can get activated even if there are no immediate threats to a relationship, but that the mate value discrepancy is a threat that looms on the horizon of the relationship because we know statistically the higher mate value person is more likely to have an affair and is more likely to dump the other person and trade up in the mating market.
因此，人们会关注配偶价值差异，因此即使关系没有立即受到威胁，嫉妒也会被激活，但配偶价值差异是关系中隐现的威胁，因为我们从统计数据上知道，配偶价值较高的人更有可能有外遇，更有可能抛弃对方并在婚配市场上进行交易。
And then what people do about it depends on what their options are.
然后人们对此做什么取决于他们的选择。
And people do things that, in my published scientific work, I say range from vigilance to violence.
在我发表的科学著作中，我所说的人们所做的事情包括从警惕到暴力。
And that can include stalking, following, hacking into iPhones or computers, monitoring the behavior of mate poachers, looking at eye contact between other men and your partner.
这可能包括跟踪、跟踪、侵入 iPhone 或电脑、监控偷猎者的行为、观察其他男人和你的伴侣之间的眼神交流。
There's a whole suite of things that is involved in vigilance.
警惕涉及一整套事情。
And then at the other extreme is violence.
另一个极端是暴力。
In America, something like 28% to 30% of all people who are married will experience intimate partner violence in their relationships.
在美国，大约 28% 到 30% 的已婚人士在恋爱关系中遭受过亲密伴侣暴力。
So it's not a trivial percentage.
所以这不是一个微不足道的百分比。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
Could you tell us about the dark triad?
你能告诉我们关于黑暗三合会的事吗？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Yeah.
是的。
So the dark triad, so we've been talking about sex differences on average, but there are critical within-sex individual differences, and the dark triad is one of the most important ones.
因此，黑暗三联征，我们一直在谈论平均性别差异，但性别内存在关键的个体差异，而黑暗三联征是最重要的差异之一。
The dark triad consists of three personality characteristics.
黑暗三人格由三个人格特征组成。
So narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy.
所以有自恋、马基雅维利主义和精神病态。
If you combine these qualities, you have some very bad dudes.
如果你把这些品质结合起来，你就会得到一些非常糟糕的家伙。
And I say bad dudes because men tend to score higher in these things than women.
我说坏人是因为男性在这些方面往往比女性得分更高。
Why is this important?
为什么这很重要？
Well, it's important in the mating context because those who are high on dark triad traits tend to be sexual deceivers, for one.
嗯，这在交配环境中很重要，因为那些具有高黑暗三合会特征的人往往是性欺骗者。
So they're very often very charming, very good at seducing women, and then abandoning them.
所以他们常常非常有魅力，非常擅长勾引女人，然后又抛弃她们。
They're very good at the art of seduction.
他们非常擅长诱惑的艺术。
They also tend to be serial sexual harassers and sexual coercers.
他们也往往是连续性骚扰者和性胁迫者。
And so if you combine dark triad traits with the dispositional pursuit of a short-term mating strategy, that's an especially deadly combination.
因此，如果你将黑暗三人格特征与对短期交配策略的性格追求结合起来，那就是一个特别致命的组合。
That's when you get sexual harassment, sexual coercion.
那就是你遭受性骚扰、性胁迫的时候。
It's a subset of men who commit the vast majority of these acts of sexual violence.
绝大多数性暴力行为都是由一小部分男性实施的。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
You mentioned stalking briefly.
你简单地提到了跟踪。
Maybe we could just talk about some of the less-known features about stalking.
也许我们可以只讨论一些有关跟踪的鲜为人知的功能。
I think I once heard you give a lecture where you said that one of the scariest things about stalking is that sometimes it works.
我想我曾经听过您的一次演讲，您说跟踪最可怕的事情之一就是有时它会起作用。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Yes.
是的。
Yeah.
是的。
Well, stalking has multiple motivations, but one of the most frequent motivations is a mating motivation, where either there's a breakup, and the woman dumps the guy, and the guy doesn't want to get dumped, he wants to maintain a relationship with her.
好吧，跟踪有多种动机，但最常见的动机之一是交配动机，要么分手，女人甩了男人，而男人不想被甩，他想与她保持关系。
And I should say that when it comes to criminal stalking, there's a huge sex difference.
我应该说，在犯罪跟踪方面，存在巨大的性别差异。
About 80% of the stalkers tend to be men, about 20% women.
大约 80% 的跟踪者往往是男性，大约 20% 是女性。
So there are women stalkers, but they're about a fourth the number compared to men.
因此，确实存在女性跟踪者，但其数量约为男性的四分之一。
So the motivation of the guys tends to be either an attempt to get back together with the woman, either sexually or in a relationship, and/or to interfere with her future mating prospects.
因此，男人的动机往往是试图与女人复合，无论是性行为还是恋爱关系，和/或干扰她未来的交配前景。
And it works some of the time in two senses.
有时它在两种意义上发挥作用。
One is it does interfere with her attempts to re-mate.
一是它确实干扰了她重新交配的尝试。
So, in fact, it scares off some guys.
所以，事实上，它吓跑了一些人。
So you show up to pick up a woman at her apartment for a date, and her ex is sitting out there glaring at you.
例如，你去一位女士的公寓接她去约会，而她的前任正坐在外面怒视着你。
And I think that the circumstances are often a mate value discrepancy where the guy realizes correctly that he will be unable to replace her with a mate of equivalent mate value, or in some cases, any mate.
我认为这种情况通常是配偶价值差异，男人正确地意识到他无法用具有同等配偶价值的配偶或在某些情况下任何配偶来取代她。
It's like, "Well, she was with me once.
就像是，“好吧，她曾经和我在一起过。
Maybe I can get her back with me again." And the other thing we found, we did a study of 2,500 victims of stalking.
也许我可以让她再次回到我身边。”我们发现的另一件事是，我们对 2,500 名跟踪受害者进行了研究。
This is with Josh Dunlea, a former student of mine who's now a professor in a criminology department.
这是乔什·邓利 (Josh Dunlea)，他是我以前的学生，现在是犯罪学系的教授。
And what we found is There were large differences between the stalker and the victim of the stalker, where the stalker tends to be much lower in mate value than the victim.
而我们发现的是，跟踪者和跟踪者的受害者之间存在很大差异，跟踪者的择偶价值往往比受害者低得多。
And so basically, it's typically the woman who realizes she can do a lot better on the mating market, and the guy realizes, "I am never going to be able to replace her with a woman of equivalent mate value, and so I'm going to use this last-ditch desperate measure to try to get her back." And occasionally it works.
所以基本上，通常是女人意识到自己可以在交配市场上做得更好，而男人则意识到，“我永远无法用具有同等伴侣价值的女人取代她，所以我将使用这种最后一搏的绝望措施来试图让她回来。”有时它会起作用。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
I'd like to take a quick break and acknowledge one of our sponsors, Function.
我想稍微休息一下并感谢我们的赞助商之一 Function。
Last year, I became a Function member after searching for the most comprehensive approach to lab testing.
去年，在寻找最全面的实验室测试方法后，我成为了 Function 成员。
Function provides over 100 advanced lab tests that give you a key snapshot of your entire bodily health.
Function 提供 100 多项高级实验室测试，为您提供整个身体健康状况的关键快照。
This snapshot offers you with insights on your heart health, hormone health, immune functioning, nutrient levels, and much more.
此快照为您提供有关心脏健康、激素健康、免疫功能、营养水平等方面的见解。
Function not only provides testing of over 100 biomarkers key to your physical and mental health, but it also analyzes these results and provides insights from top doctors who are expert in the relevant areas.
Function 不仅提供对您的身心健康至关重要的 100 多种生物标记物的测试，而且还分析这些结果并提供相关领域专家的顶级医生的见解。
For example, in one of my first tests with Function, I learned that I had elevated levels of mercury in my blood.
例如，在我第一次使用 Function 进行测试时，我发现我的血液中汞含量升高。
Function not only helped me detect that, but offered insights into how best to reduce my mercury levels, which included limiting my tuna consumption, I'd been eating a lot of tuna, while also making an effort to eat more leafy greens and supplementing with NAC, N-acetylcysteine, both of which can support glutathione production and detoxification.
功能不仅帮助我发现了这一点，还为我提供了如何最好地降低汞含量的见解，其中包括限制我的金枪鱼摄入量，我一直在吃大量金枪鱼，同时还努力多吃绿叶蔬菜并补充 NAC、N-乙酰半胱氨酸，这两者都可以支持谷胱甘肽的产生和解毒。
And I should say, by taking a second Function test, that approach worked.
我应该说，通过进行第二次功能测试，这种方法奏效了。
Comprehensive blood testing is vitally important.
全面的血液检测至关重要。
There are so many things related to your mental and physical health that can only be detected in a blood test.
有很多与您的心理和身体健康相关的事情只能通过血液检查来检测。
The problem is, blood testing has always been very expensive and complicated.
问题是，血液检测一直非常昂贵且复杂。
In contrast, I've been super impressed by Function's simplicity and at the level of cost.
相比之下，Function 的简单性和成本水平给我留下了深刻的印象。
It is very affordable.
这是非常实惠的。
As a consequence, I decided to join their scientific advisory board, and I'm thrilled that they're sponsoring the podcast.
因此，我决定加入他们的科学顾问委员会，我很高兴他们赞助了这个播客。
If you'd like to try Function, you can go to functionhealth.com/huberman.
如果您想尝试 Function，可以访问 functionhealth.com/huberman。
Function currently has a wait list of over 250,000 people, but they're offering early access to Huberman podcast listeners.
Function 目前有超过 250,000 人的等待名单，但他们正在为 Huberman 播客听众提供早期访问服务。
Again, that's functionhealth.com/huberman to get early access to Function.
同样，可以通过 functionhealth.com/huberman 提前访问 Function。
I realize it's not your specific area of expertise, but these days there's a lot of discussion about how early childhood attachment to parents influences mate choice later on.
我知道这不是你的专业领域，但现在有很多关于童年时期对父母的依恋如何影响后来的择偶选择的讨论。
Is there anything interesting about childhood attachment strategies vis-a-vis stability of long-term partner choice, or is that too big of a leap for us to make here?
与长期伴侣选择的稳定性相比，童年依恋策略有什么有趣的地方吗？还是说这对我们来说太大了，无法在这里实现？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Yeah.
是的。
Well, I can offer some sort of informed speculation about it.
好吧，我可以对此提供一些有根据的猜测。
A secure attachment style, if both partners have a secure attachment style, that's conducive to a long-term mateship.
安全的依恋风格，如果双方都有安全的依恋风格，那有利于长期的伴侣关系。
Avoidant attachment styles, avoidant people tend to have more difficulty with intimacy and also a higher probability of infidelity.
回避型依恋风格，回避型的人往往更难以建立亲密关系，而且出现不忠的可能性也更高。
And anxious attachment style, I don't know, can create problems of its own, in the overly clingy, dependent, absorbing, what I call high relationship load.
我不知道，焦虑的依恋风格会产生自己的问题，因为过度粘人、依赖、吸引人，我称之为高关系负荷。
What is the baggage that someone brings to the relationship?
某人给这段关系带来的包袱是什么？
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
How should one frame all this?
应该如何构建这一切？
So I imagine a number of people listening are in relationships or would hope to be in a relationship.
所以我想很多听的人都已经恋爱了或者希望建立恋爱关系。
In terms of understanding what we are selecting for consciously or subconsciously, it seems like there are common themes.
就理解我们有意识或无意识地选择什么而言，似乎存在共同的主题。
It's people want to feel attractive and attracted.
人们想要感到有吸引力和被吸引。
People want to make sure that there's stability of the relationship.
人们希望确保关系的稳定性。
So when we hear about security, oftentimes I think of this kind of warm oxytocin, serotonin-like thing.
所以当我们听到安全时，我常常会想到这种温暖的催产素、血清素之类的东西。
But this mate value thing seems so powerful in all this, assessing mate value.
但在这一切中，评估配偶价值的“配偶价值”似乎非常强大。
So how objective are people about assessing their own value in terms of finding, securing, and over time, maintaining a relationship?
那么，人们在寻找、维持以及长期维持关系方面评估自己的价值有多客观呢？
Securing is dynamic because people age at different rates.
保障是动态的，因为人们的衰老速度不同。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Right.
对。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
Is there an objective metric of this stuff?
这个东西有客观的衡量标准吗？
I guess you get a lot of statistics about somebody's image-
我想你会得到很多关于某人形象的统计数据-
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Yeah
是啊
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
...
...
and you come up with an average value based on the population.
然后你根据人口得出平均值。
But how should people assess themselves?
但人们应该如何评价自己呢？
Because it seems like one of the features that would be very powerful for leading to happiness, of good partner selection, that's stable, would be to be very honest with oneself.
因为选择良好的伴侣、稳定的、对带来幸福非常有力的特征之一，就是对自己非常诚实。
And how does one do that?
如何做到这一点？
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
A couple things.
有几件事。
So one is that I think people are generally pretty good at self-assessing mate value, and even self-esteem has been hypothesized to be one internal monitoring device that tracks mate value.
因此，我认为人们通常非常善于自我评估配偶价值，甚至自尊也被假设为一种追踪配偶价值的内部监控装置。
So when we get a promotion at work or we get a rise in status, we feel an elevated sense of self-esteem.
因此，当我们在工作中获得晋升或地位提升时，我们会感到自尊感增强。
We get fired, we get rejected, we get ostracized, our self-esteem plummets.
我们被解雇、被拒绝、被排斥、自尊心直线下降。
So our self-evaluation, I think, does track mate value to some extent.
所以我认为，我们的自我评价确实在某种程度上追踪了伴侣的价值。
There are people who overestimate their mate value, people high on narcissism in particular, and some people underestimate their mate value.
有些人高估了自己的伴侣价值，尤其是自恋的人，而有些人则低估了自己的伴侣价值。
Another important element is that there's consensual mate value.
另一个重要因素是双方同意的择偶价值。
So that is, if you asked a group of 100 people, there's a fair amount of consensus that this person's an eight, that person's a six.
也就是说，如果你询问 100 个人，大家都会一致认为这个人是 8 分，那个人是 6 分。
Okay?
好的？
But there are also individual differences in mate value.
但择偶价值也存在个体差异。
So let's say you're into football and the other partner thinks sports are stupid, then someone who's also into sports is going to be higher in mate value for you.
假设你喜欢足球，而另一个伴侣认为运动很愚蠢，那么同样喜欢运动的人对你来说的择偶价值会更高。
So there are these individual differences in components of mate value, which is good, because that means if everyone were going after the same people and there was total consensus on mate value, then there would be a lot of mateless people and a lot of problems in the world, and a lot of dissatisfied people.
因此，择偶价值的组成部分存在个体差异，这是好事，因为这意味着，如果每个人都追求同一个人，并且对择偶价值有完全的共识，那么世界上就会有很多无配偶的人，会有很多问题，也会有很多不满意的人。
So- Both are important, the consensual aspects and the individually differentiated components of mate value.
因此，双方同意的方面和配偶价值的个体差异部分都很重要。
But in terms of accuracy of assessment, there are no good measures scientifically to do this because it's a very complicated endeavor to assess accurately.
但就评估的准确性而言，科学上还没有很好的措施来做到这一点，因为准确评估是一个非常复杂的工作。
But I think people have a good intuitive sense of people's relative mate value, especially if you're in a group and you've been able to interact with them for a long time.
但我认为人们对人们的相对伴侣价值有很好的直觉，特别是当你在一个群体中并且你已经能够与他们互动很长时间时。
And one indication is, again, that attention structure, how many other people really want to mate with this person?
另一个迹象是，注意力结构，有多少人真正想与这个人交配？
That's a good cue that they're high in mate value.
这是一个很好的暗示，表明它们的择偶价值很高。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
I find the work that you do incredibly interesting.
我发现你所做的工作非常有趣。
I think this field of evolutionary psychology is fascinating, and I said it before, but I'll say it again, I feel like neuroscience and evolutionary psychology are nudging towards one another.
我认为进化心理学这一领域很有趣，我之前说过，但我再说一遍，我觉得神经科学和进化心理学正在相互推动。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
I think you're absolutely right, and I think it will happen.
我认为你是完全正确的，而且我认为这将会发生。
I think it's starting to happen, and it will happen because getting at the neuroscience is getting at the underlying mechanisms that are driving the process.
我认为这已经开始发生，而且它将会发生，因为了解神经科学就是了解驱动这一过程的潜在机制。
So, what an evolutionary perspective brings to bear is evolved function, and ultimate explanation, the selective forces that created adaptations, the functions of those adaptations, and the neuroscience brings, well, what is the underlying machinery that these mechanisms are instantiated in?
那么，进化论的观点所带来的是进化功能、最终解释、创造适应的选择力、这些适应的功能，以及神经科学带来的，那么，这些机制实例化的潜在机制是什么？
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
I'm certain that people are going to want to learn more about your work.
我确信人们会想更多地了解你的工作。
Certainly we will give them links to your social media and other sites.
当然，我们会给他们提供您的社交媒体和其他网站的链接。
You've written a tremendous number of really interesting books.
你写了很多非常有趣的书。
Tell us about your most recent book and maybe some of the others that if people are interested in these topics and they want to learn more, that they could explore.
告诉我们您最近的一本书，也许还有其他一些书，如果人们对这些主题感兴趣并且他们想了解更多，他们可以探索。
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Sure.
当然。
Okay, so well, my most recent book is called "When Men Behave Badly: The Hidden Roots of Sexual Deception, Harassment, and Assault", and that book deals with conflict between the sexes, sexual conflict.
好吧，好吧，我最近的一本书叫做《当男人行为恶劣时：性欺骗、骚扰和性侵犯的隐藏根源》，那本书讨论了两性之间的冲突，性冲突。
And so it deals with them, both in what I call mating market conflicts, some of the topics we've been talking about, deception in internet dating and things like that.
因此，它涉及到这些问题，无论是我所说的交配市场冲突，还是我们一直在谈论的一些话题，网络约会中的欺骗等等。
Second is conflict that occurs within mating relationships of the sort that we've been talking about as well, financial infidelity, emotional infidelity, sexual infidelity, coping with conflict within a relationship, and I actually have some suggestions for strategies for coping with conflict within a relationship.
其次是我们一直在谈论的那种交配关系中发生的冲突，经济不忠、情感不忠、性不忠、处理关系中的冲突，实际上我对处理关系中的冲突的策略有一些建议。
Dealing with the aftermath of breakups.
处理分手后的后果。
So often there's an asymmetry.
所以经常会出现不对称的情况。
One person wants to break up, the other doesn't.
一个人想分手，另一个人不想分手。
So I talk about coping in the aftermath.
所以我谈论的是灾后的应对。
And then I also talk in this book, "When Men Behave Badly" about some of the darker sides of human mating, like intimate partner violence, stalking, sexual harassment, sexual coercion.
然后我还在这本书《当男人行为不好时》中谈论了人类交配的一些阴暗面，比如亲密伴侣的暴力、跟踪、性骚扰、性胁迫。
So that's what that book's about, and I think it's gotten well reviewed and people find it very useful in understanding what is otherwise a lot of baffling phenomena.
这就是那本书的内容，我认为它得到了很好的评论，人们发现它对于理解许多令人困惑的现象非常有用。
Why do men and women seem at odds with each other in so many domains?
为什么男人和女人在很多领域都存在分歧？
Why do some of these recurrent forms of sexual conflict occur?
为什么某些反复发生的性冲突会发生？
So that's what that book's about.
这就是那本书的内容。
My previous book, so my first book, which I've had the good fortune to be able to revise a couple times, deals more broadly with human mating strategies.
我的上一本书，也就是我的第一本书，我很幸运能够修改几次，更广泛地讨论了人类的交配策略。
It's called "The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating", and gives people a broad overview of what people want in a mate, tactics of attraction, tactics of mate retention, and so forth throughout the whole mating process, serial mating, causes of divorce, and so forth.
这本书的名字叫《欲望的进化：人类交配策略》，让人们对交配过程中人们想要的东西、吸引策略、保留交配策略等有一个广泛的概述，包括连续交配、离婚原因等等。
And then, even more broadly, I have a textbook called "Evolutionary Psychology: The New Science of the Mind", which is in its sixth edition right now, and it's the most widely used textbook in evolutionary psychology around North America and Europe and actually it's been translated even into Arabic and other countries.
然后，更广泛地说，我有一本叫《进化心理学：新心灵科学》的教科书，现在是第六版，它是北美和欧洲使用最广泛的进化心理学教科书，实际上它甚至被翻译成阿拉伯语和其他国家。
So that deals somewhat with mating, but also deals with survival problems or evolved fears and phobias, issues about kin and family, extended family, friendships, social hierarchies, status hierarchies, warfare, and other topics.
因此，这在一定程度上涉及交配，但也涉及生存问题或进化而来的恐惧和恐惧症、有关亲属和家庭、大家庭、友谊、社会等级制度、地位等级制度、战争和其他主题的问题。
So the evolutionary psychology textbook is the broadest book, and then maybe the second broadest is "The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating".
所以进化心理学教科书是最广泛的书，然后也许第二广泛的是《欲望的进化：人类交配策略》。
And then for those interested in conflict between the sexes, the latest book, "When Men Behave Badly".
对于那些对两性冲突感兴趣的人，可以阅读最新的书《当男人行为不当时》。
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
Fantastic.
太棒了。
I love your work.
我喜欢你的工作。
I'm so grateful for the clarity and depth and rigor with which you do it-
我非常感谢你的清晰、深度和严谨——
Andrew Huberman:
安德鲁·休伯曼：
Thank you
谢谢你
Dr. David Buss:
大卫·巴斯博士：
...
...
and you convey it to us.
然后您将其传达给我们。
I know I speak for many people when I just want to say thank you.
我知道当我只想说谢谢时，我代表了很多人。
This is a tremendously informative conversation.
这是一次内容丰富的对话。
Speaker 3:
演讲者3：
"I don't think I can be your friend," Isabella said.
“我想我不能成为你的朋友，”伊莎贝拉说。
Rebecca's stomach flipped.
丽贝卡的胃翻腾起来。
This is the love story of real Hinge couple Isabella and Rebecca, written and read by me, Tembi Denton-Hurst.
这是真实的铰链夫妇伊莎贝拉和丽贝卡的爱情故事，由我 Tembi Denton-Hurst 撰写和阅读。
Listen to the free audiobook now.
立即收听免费有声读物。