841: My Senior Year - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #841 | September 20, 2024 841: My Senior Year Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 841 集 | 2024 年 9 月 20 日 841：我的高年级 注：《美国生活》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
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如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue: Prologue Chana Joffe-Walt From WBEZ Chicago, it's This American Life.
序言：序言 来自 WBEZ 芝加哥的 Chana Joffe-Walt，这就是《美国生活》。
I'm Chana Joffe-Walt, sitting in for Ira Glass.
我是查娜·乔夫-沃尔特 (Chana Joffe-Walt)，代理艾拉·格拉斯 (Ira Glass)。
It's the first day of high school, Salt Lake City.
这是盐湖城高中的第一天。
A bunch of students are standing around outside in clusters, and the seniors are wearing little kid backpacks-- Ninja Turtles, Hello Kitty, Spider-man.
一群学生三五成群地站在外面，高年级学生背着小背包——忍者神龟、凯蒂猫、蜘蛛侠。
Big 17-, 18-year-old kids in Winnie-the-Pooh backpacks.
背着小熊维尼背包的 17、18 岁大孩子。
My colleague Miki Meek talked to seniors Estrella and Angie.
我的同事 Miki Meek 与高年级学生 Estrella 和 Angie 进行了交谈。
So, you guys, what is the deal with-- what's up with the backpacks?
那么，各位，背包怎么了？
Why is this a senior thing?
为什么这是高级的事情？
'Cause we enter school, kindergarten, with kids' backpacks, you know?
因为我们带着孩子的背包进入学校、幼儿园，你知道吗？
'Cause we're little kids.
因为我们都是小孩子
And then we're leaving school with these on as well.
然后我们也带着这些离开学校。
Do you guys have any specific plans you've already made for this year that you want to do together because it is your senior year?
今年是你们的高年级，你们有没有为今年制定的具体计划想要一起做？
Actually, on Thursday or tomorrow, we're going to go change our classes so we can be together more and make sure we have the same lunches and stuff.
事实上，在周四或明天，我们将改变我们的课程，这样我们就可以更多地在一起，并确保我们有相同的午餐和东西。
Yeah.
是的。
Miki Meek You guys are in how many classes together?
Miki Meek 你们一起上几个班？
Zero.
零。
Angie [LAUGHS] Yeah, we have none.
安吉（笑）是的，我们没有。
So what's your plan for trying to get the same classes?
那么你打算如何尝试获得相同的课程呢？
We're going to beg our counselor.
我们要去恳求我们的辅导员。
We're going to be like, we have separation anxiety.
我们会说，我们有分离焦虑。
We have to be together.
我们必须在一起。
I'm going to be like, Mark-- that's his name, Mark.
我会说，马克——那是他的名字，马克。
I'll be like, Mark, please let us be together.
我会说，马克，请让我们在一起吧。
We want to enjoy our senior year, you know?
我们想要享受我们的高年级，你知道吗？
It's our last year together because we're both going different ways.
这是我们在一起的最后一年，因为我们走的路不同。
They are really feeling the last timeness of this year ahead of them, the last year in these classes, in these halls, in backpacks, the last year of these friendships in this place, with these people.
他们确实感受到了今年的最后时光，这是在这些课堂上、在这些大厅里、在背包里的最后一年，是在这个地方、与这些人建立友谊的最后一年。
After this, their lives will be different.
从此以后，他们的人生将会不一样。
All the seniors we talked to had a list of things you have to do senior year, stuff they'd seen other kids do before them, and also all the iconic experiences they'd seen in a million movies and TV shows.
我们采访过的所有高年级学生都列出了高年级必须做的事情、他们在他们之前看到其他孩子做过的事情，以及他们在一百万部电影和电视节目中看到的所有标志性经历。
This school, in fact, is actually the school from High School Musical.
事实上，这所学校就是《歌舞青春》中的学校。
It was filmed here.
是在这里拍摄的。
Anyway, they all have lists that include the classics-- prom, football games, homecoming, senior sunrise, senior sunset, senior parties, senior memory boxes-- that's a thing that was new to me, along with--
不管怎样，他们都有包含经典的清单——舞会、足球比赛、返校节、高年级日出、高年级日落、高年级聚会、高年级记忆盒——这对我来说是新事物，还有——
There's this thing called trash bagging.
有一种东西叫垃圾袋。
What is that?
那是什么？
Student It's like when it's raining, you put on a trash bag and slide down hills.
学生就像下雨的时候，你套上垃圾袋，从山上滑下来。
Yeah, make holes for your legs and arms probably, like over you on a swimsuit, kind of.
是的，可能会在你的腿和手臂上打洞，就像穿泳衣一样。
I've never done it.
我从来没有这样做过。
So she has to.
所以她必须这么做。
Looming over each rite of passage, no matter how stupid, is the fear that if you don't go for it, you could miss something really special, something fleeting.
无论多么愚蠢，每一个成年礼都笼罩着你的恐惧，如果你不去做，你可能会错过一些真正特别的东西，一些转瞬即逝的东西。
You have one chance at senior year.
你在高年级有一次机会。
You have to grab it.
你必须抓住它。
You have to go big.
你必须做大。
Ferris Bueller's Day Off is my number one inspiration.
Ferris Bueller 的休息日是我的第一个灵感。
This is Vasey.
这是瓦西。
Vasey I want to be him.
瓦西 我想成为他。
I don't know if I'm well-known enough to become East High's Ferris Bueller, but that's my goal, is to take an extraordinary crazy day off that will be talked about for generations.
我不知道我是否有足够的知名度成为东高中的费里斯·布勒，但这就是我的目标，就是度过一个非凡而疯狂的假期，这将被几代人谈论。
She's still working on a plan for that.
她仍在为此制定计划。
But in the meantime, Vasey's got many other plans.
但与此同时，瓦西还有许多其他计划。
Vasey says she spent most of high school going back home to her hole to study.
瓦西说，她高中的大部分时间都在家里学习。
Not this year.
今年不行。
So when she got an invite to a pink party for senior girls, something Vasey never would have gone to before, she went for it.
因此，当她收到邀请参加一个为高年级女孩举办的粉色派对时，瓦西以前从未参加过这样的活动，她就去了。
I wore a pink babydoll dress.
我穿着一件粉红色的娃娃装连衣裙。
I have knee-high go-go boots that I wore.
我穿的是及膝高筒靴。
And I stole my mom's pearls to wear because it was kind of a formal event.
我偷了我妈妈的珍珠戴，因为这是一个正式的活动。
And it's a tradition that the girls all jump in the pool.
女孩们都跳进泳池是一个传统。
So me and my friends jumped in the pool.
于是我和我的朋友跳进了游泳池。
I was talking with my friends the other day, and we said that it's kind of fun to-- we complain about it a lot, but it's kind of fun to just be a girl going to an American public high school because you get that kind of Americana high school thing, you know?
前几天我和我的朋友们聊天，我们说这很有趣——我们抱怨了很多，但作为一个去美国公立高中的女孩也很有趣，因为你得到了那种美国高中的东西，你知道吗？
Being a senior is this hyped-up event.
成为一名高年级学生是一件令人兴奋的事情。
So it's kind of like I get to do all of the cheesy things that they do in the coming of age movies that make me feel like I really am just an American teenage girl.
所以这就像我可以做他们在成长电影中所做的所有俗气的事情，让我觉得我真的只是一个美国十几岁的女孩。
[LAUGHS]
[笑]
I feel like I've got to be happy with what I've done and feel satisfied with what I've done.
我觉得我必须对自己所做的事情感到高兴并对自己所做的事情感到满意。
Like doing everything?
喜欢做所有事情？
Vasey Doing everything until it's worn out, and so I feel like I have no unfinished business at East High.
Vasey 做所有事情直到精疲力尽，所以我觉得我在东高中没有未完成的事情。
Senior year-- just the idea of it, with all its rituals and big feelings and corsages, it's so powerful, people across the world know about the American high school experience.
高三——只是它的想法，连同它所有的仪式、伟大的感情和胸花，它是如此强大，世界各地的人们都知道美国高中的经历。
It's an American export.
这是美国出口的。
I've been following one kid who came to America as an exchange student and committed herself to the senior year experience in a way I have never seen before.
我一直在关注一个作为交换生来到美国的孩子，她以一种我从未见过的方式致力于高年级的经历。
She and a group of kids from all over the world showed up with Ferris Bueller and High School Musical in their heads, with their own ambitions of having the best year ever and going home with great memories, no experience or opportunity missed.
她和一群来自世界各地的孩子们出现在他们的脑海中，脑海中浮现着《费里斯·布勒》和《歌舞青春》，他们的野心是度过有史以来最美好的一年，带着美好的回忆回家，不错过任何经历或机会。
Today's show, "It's Senior Year." Stay with us.
今天的节目是《今年是高年级》。留在我们身边。
Act One: Yes 2024 Chana Joffe-Walt It's This American Life.
第一幕：是的 2024 年 Chana Joffe-Walt 这就是美国生活。
Act One, "YES 2024." One of the many programs that brings international high school students to the United States is the YES Program-- the Youth Exchange and Study Program.
第一幕，“YES 2024”。 YES 计划是吸引国际高中生来美国的众多计划之一——青年交流和学习计划。
The program is run by the State Department.
该计划由国务院负责管理。
It was created after 9/11 for students from places with a significant Muslim population.
它是在 9/11 之后为来自穆斯林人口较多地区的学生创建的。
The kids come to the US, spend a year at an American high school, live with an American family, and, quote, "engage in activities to learn about the US society and values."
孩子们来到美国，在美国高中学习一年，与美国家庭生活在一起，并“参与活动以了解美国社会和价值观”。
YES is a really hard program to get into.
YES 是一个非常难进入的项目。
Kids spend years preparing to apply.
孩子们花了数年时间准备申请。
They need excellent grades, excellent English skills, written and verbal.
他们需要优异的成绩、出色的书面和口头英语技能。
There's an interview, a vetting process.
有一个面试，一个审查过程。
About 30,000 students apply every year, and around 3% get in.
每年约有 30,000 名学生申请，大约 3% 被录取。
In 2023, 500 kids from Gaza applied to the YES program.
2023 年，500 名加沙儿童申请了 YES 计划。
13 got in, and one of those was Majd.
13 个人进来了，其中之一就是 Majd。
OK, so when I first heard about it, it's like, oh, my god.
好吧，当我第一次听说它时，感觉就像是，哦，天哪。
Like, that seems like the perfect life for me, and I want to go there.
就像，这对我来说似乎是完美的生活，我想去那里。
The YES program was Majd's idea, not her parents'.
YES 计划是 Majd 的主意，而不是她父母的主意。
Majd is a kid who has plans for herself.
马吉德是一个为自己制定计划的孩子。
You can feel the propulsion forward when you sit with Majd.
当你和 Majd 坐在一起时，你可以感受到前进的推动力。
It's exhilarating, sometimes terrifying, like riding shotgun with a highly competent, yet speeding, driver.
这是令人兴奋的，有时是可怕的，就像与一个非常有能力但超速行驶的司机一起骑着猎枪。
Majd heard about YES from kids who had already done it, YES alumni in Gaza, young adults who told Majd about their year going to high school in America.
马吉德从已经这样做过的孩子、加沙的 YES 校友、告诉马吉德他们在美国上高中的那一年的年轻人那里听说了 YES。
And they told me about the application process and everything.
他们告诉我申请流程和一切。
So I started preparing really early.
所以我很早就开始准备。
What did they say about it?
他们对此有何评论？
Majd Some of them described it to me as if it was like absolute heaven.
马吉德 他们中的一些人向我描述它，就好像它就像绝对的天堂一样。
You're partying every day.
你每天都在聚会。
You're getting five Domino pizza boxes every day.
您每天都会收到五个多米诺披萨盒。
[LAUGHS] Yeah, no, for me, honestly, all my life, I haven't been the fun, going out kid.
[笑]是的，不，对我来说，老实说，我这辈子都不是一个有趣的、喜欢出去玩的孩子。
I was really focused on academics.
我真的很专注于学术。
And I like the idea of the 4.0 scale GPA.
我喜欢 GPA 4.0 的想法。
Like--
就像——
I love that other people were excited about Domino's pizza, and you were excited about the 4.0 grade scale.
我喜欢其他人对达美乐披萨感到兴奋，而你对 4.0 等级量表感到兴奋。
Yes.
是的。
I mean, yeah.
我的意思是，是的。
I mean, I kind of have a reasonable explanation for that.
我的意思是，我对此有一个合理的解释。
But--
但是——
Her explanation goes like this.
她的解释是这样的。
Majd wanted a perfect transcript.
马吉德想要一份完美的成绩单。
She wants to be eligible for the best scholarships to study astrophysics at the best university, maybe in Gaza or maybe in the US.
她希望有资格获得最好的奖学金，在最好的大学学习天体物理学，可能在加沙，也可能在美国。
Princeton looks interesting to her.
普林斯顿对她来说看起来很有趣。
Majd doesn't want a stray 99% grade to get in the way of where she's going.
Majd 不希望 99% 的成绩妨碍她前进的道路。
Literally, point to point really makes a difference.
从字面上看，点对点确实会产生影响。
Like, if you get 99.6%, you get a scholarship.
比如，如果你达到 99.6%，你就会获得奖学金。
But if you get 99.5%, which is a 4.0, you don't get the scholarship.
但如果你得到了 99.5%，即 4.0，你就得不到奖学金。
How old were you when you figured all of this out?
当你弄清楚这一切的时候你多大了？
She applied along with her friend, Abdulrahman.
她和她的朋友阿卜杜拉赫曼一起申请。
He goes by Aboud.
他的名字是阿布德。
And on February 16, 2023, they both got in.
2023 年 2 月 16 日，他们双双入住。
Majd was 15 years old.
马吉德当时 15 岁。
And we both started screaming on the phone.
我们都开始在电话里尖叫。
And all the neighbors heard me.
所有的邻居都听到了我的声音。
And, oh, my god, it was truly sensational.
而且，哦，天哪，这真是太轰动了。
In Gaza, YES alumni are sort of like influencers.
在加沙，YES 校友有点像有影响力的人。
They're a little famous, at least to the kids trying to get into the program.
他们有点出名，至少对于那些想加入这个项目的孩子来说是这样。
They post on Instagram from their year in America.
他们在 Instagram 上发布了他们在美国一年的经历。
And when they get back, they'd hold assemblies and run programs and seemed like the best of friends.
当他们回来时，他们会举行集会并运行程序，看起来就像是最好的朋友。
The YES groups had a real bond.
YES 团体之间有着真正的联系。
Majd and her group of 13 would be their own crew.
Majd 和她的 13 人小组将成为他们自己的船员。
They'd be YES '24 for 2024.
2024 年他们将成为 YES '24。
Some of them knew each other, and some met for the first time on a bus trip to Jerusalem to get their visas, a day they all talk about as incredible.
他们中有些人彼此认识，有些人是在前往耶路撒冷办理签证的巴士上第一次见面，他们都认为这一天令人难以置信。
One of them told me best day of his life, a day they really got close as a group.
其中一个人告诉我他一生中最美好的一天，他们作为一个团队真正变得亲密的一天。
There was Majd and Aboud.
有马吉德和阿布德。
There was Fatima, an exuberant 15-year-old, an extrovert from a family of introverts who could picture the whole year ahead of her.
法蒂玛 (Fatima) 15 岁，精力充沛，来自一个内向家庭，性格外向，可以想象未来的一整年。
You know like in the movies, like locker room.
你知道，就像电影里的那样，更衣室。
You go on a school bus.
你坐校车去。
You have a lot of friends that play sports.
你有很多做运动的朋友。
You play sports by yourself.
你自己做运动。
And then they would always mention, in every single American high school movie, basketball or football.
然后他们总是会在每部美国高中电影中提到篮球或橄榄球。
Oh, yeah.
哦，是的。
Mm-hmm.
嗯嗯。
And that made you want to go to an American high school?
这让你想去美国高中？
Farah I got placed in Oklahoma, in a small town.
法拉 我被安置在俄克拉荷马州的一个小镇。
I barely ever heard of Minnesota before.
我以前几乎从未听说过明尼苏达州。
Of course I know of Prince.
我当然知道王子。
I knew Bob Dylan.
我认识鲍勃·迪伦。
I was like, oh, I love Maine.
我当时想，哦，我爱缅因州。
But I was scared because nobody's there.
但我很害怕，因为没有人在那里。
I don't know anybody there.
我不认识那里的任何人。
And it's in the end of the map.
它位于地图的末尾。
Oh, my gosh.
哦，天哪。
I waited for so long, and I got somewhere that's worth it.
我等了这么久，终于找到了值得的地方。
California is probably like a cool place, you know?
加州可能是一个很酷的地方，你知道吗？
I pictured Los Angeles, but then, ooh, Northern California, Redding.
我想象了洛杉矶，但后来，哦，北加州，雷丁。
I mean, so country.
我的意思是，所以国家。
I mean, yes, I wanted New York City or California, but I mean, I was like, oh, OK, Ohio.
我的意思是，是的，我想要纽约市或加利福尼亚州，但我的意思是，我想，哦，好吧，俄亥俄州。
Well, let's discover Ohio.
好吧，让我们探索俄亥俄州。
In August 2023, Majd leaves Gaza.
2023 年 8 月，马吉德离开加沙。
She says goodbye to her mom, dad, and younger sister.
她向妈妈、爸爸和妹妹告别。
The YES '24 kids arrive in Washington, DC and take a group photo.
YES '24 孩子们抵达华盛顿特区并拍了一张合影。
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] All [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
[非英语演讲] 全部 [非英语演讲]
And then they all scatter.
然后他们就全部散开。
It's the last time they'll be together before the end of the program.
这是节目结束前他们最后一次聚在一起。
September 2023, Majd heads to Washington State, a city called Bremerton, a Navy town about an hour and a half drive from Seattle.
2023 年 9 月，马吉德前往华盛顿州，一座名为布雷默顿的城市，这是一个距离西雅图约一个半小时车程的海军城镇。
In her first few weeks in Bremerton, Majd studied her new school like she studied for exams.
在布雷默顿的最初几周，马吉德像准备考试一样学习她的新学校。
She took mental notes.
她在心里记下了笔记。
The ROTC kids are higher status.
ROTC的孩子地位更高。
Being in a relationship-- highly valued.
处于一段关系中——受到高度重视。
Academics-- less so.
学术界——则不然。
The thing Majd noticed American teenagers seemed to value above all else, though, was fun.
不过，马吉德注意到美国青少年似乎最看重的就是有趣。
Majd did not think of herself as fun.
马吉德并不认为自己很有趣。
She didn't exactly think of herself as a teenager either.
她也不完全认为自己是一个青少年。
Majd is always more comfortable talking with adults.
马吉德总是更愿意与成年人交谈。
But no matter.
但没关系。
She was here to succeed as an American high schooler.
她来这里是为了成为一名成功的美国高中生。
So she became a student of fun.
于是她就成了一个有趣的学生。
She told me incredulously, when they finished a unit in class, the teacher had a raffle with prizes.
她难以置信地告诉我，当他们在课堂上完成一个单元时，老师举办了抽奖活动。
She took a video and showed it to me.
她拍了一段视频给我看。
Just look, she said, pointing at all the kids cheering.
看看吧，她指着所有欢呼的孩子说道。
[CHEERING, LAUGHTER] Majd Typical American high school.
[欢呼，笑声] Majd 典型的美国高中。
What makes that typical American high school?
是什么造就了这所典型的美国高中？
I don't know.
我不知道。
I've noticed that they're very loud.
我注意到他们声音很大。
I'm just not-- one time, I remember I tried to cheer like they do.
我只是不——有一次，我记得我试图像他们一样欢呼。
It didn't work out.
但没有成功。
It just-- yeah, I can't scream.
只是——是的，我不能尖叫。
When did you try it?
你什么时候尝试过？
Majd Like for a basketball game.
马吉德·莱克 (Majd Like) 参加篮球比赛。
And all the vibes were great, and we were having fun.
所有的氛围都很棒，我们玩得很开心。
But I said, OK, let me try.
但我说，好吧，让我试试。
But then, yeah, I just felt so kind of out of place.
但后来，是的，我只是觉得有点格格不入。
Like, what am I doing?
就像，我在做什么？
Why am I screaming?
我为什么尖叫？
[LAUGHS] So, yeah.
[笑]所以，是的。
What does it sound like when you try to cheer like an American?
当你尝试像美国人一样欢呼时，听起来是什么样的？
For me, it sounds like a rat trying-- like I mean [LAUGHS] a rat dying.
对我来说，这听起来就像一只老鼠在尝试——就像我的意思是[笑]一只正在死去的老鼠。
Majd was aware of all the ways she didn't fit in.
马吉德清楚自己与周围环境的种种格格不入。
Still, she wasn't miserable.
尽管如此，她并不悲惨。
She says she was the only Muslim in school, but she was kind of expecting that.
她说她是学校里唯一的穆斯林，但她有点期待这一点。
Her host family, an older couple, was not a great match, but she moved in with a new host family-- better fit.
她的寄宿家庭是一对年长的夫妇，不太适合她，但她搬到了一个新的寄宿家庭——更适合。
She ate lunch in the nurse's office every day, but she liked the nurse.
她每天都在护士办公室吃午饭，但她很喜欢这个护士。
They talked.
他们说话了。
And nothing deterred her.
没有什么能阻止她。
Her goal was being the very best YES student.
她的目标是成为最好的 YES 学生。
YES kids are all encouraged to post on social media.
是的，我们鼓励孩子们在社交媒体上发帖。
Majd was excited by the possibility of her posts being reposted by the official YES account.
Majd 对她的帖子可能被 YES 官方帐户转发感到兴奋。
So Majd went to everything-- football games--
所以马吉德参加了所有活动——足球比赛——
--pep rallies-- Woman (SINGING) O say does that star spang--
--鼓舞士气的集会--女人（唱歌）噢，那颗星是不是--
--Homecoming.
——归来。
DJ Casper (SINGING) Left foot, let's stomp
DJ Casper（唱歌）左脚，让我们跺一下
Charlie Brown Chana Joffe-Walt It all went into her YES '24 highlight on Instagram.
Charlie Brown Chana Joffe-Walt 这一切都融入了她在 Instagram 上的 YES '24 高光时刻。
October, Majd must have been an American high schooler for less than six weeks when Hamas attacked Southern Israel, killed over 1,000 Israelis and took 251 people hostage.
10 月，哈马斯袭击以色列南部，杀死 1,000 多名以色列人，并劫持 251 人作为人质，当时马吉德在美国读高中还不到六周。
Yeah, it was the weekend coming up, and it was about 9:00 or 10:00 PM.
是的，周末即将到来，时间大约是晚上 9:00 或 10:00。
And I was just scrolling on Instagram on my phone.
我只是用手机浏览 Instagram。
And then I saw some weird news videos.
然后我看到了一些奇怪的新闻视频。
And I'm like, oh, my god, is that really happening?
我想，天啊，这真的发生了吗？
The next day, Majd couldn't reach her parents or younger sister.
第二天，马吉德无法联系到她的父母或妹妹。
By Monday morning, she got news they were alive and at home, nothing more.
到周一早上，她得到消息说他们还活着，并且在家，仅此而已。
By the end of that first week, it sounded dire.
到第一周结束时，情况听起来很可怕。
Hey, things are really bad.
嘿，事情真的很糟糕。
We don't have electricity.
我们没有电。
We don't have anything.
我们什么都没有。
And at that time, they were running low on food, too.
那时，他们的食物也不足了。
And they were like-- everything was closed.
他们就像——一切都关闭了。
And, yeah, I was very worried about them.
是的，我非常担心他们。
And, yeah, I just started having a lot of nightmares.
是的，我刚刚开始做很多噩梦。
Yeah, and they were trying not to tell me a lot of things for me not to worry here, but I already know a lot of things.
是的，他们试图不告诉我很多事情，让我不用担心，但我已经知道了很多事情。
They can't just hide it from me.
他们不能就这样对我隐瞒。
And it was just very sad for me to see that they care about my safety and happiness and not about them.
看到他们关心我的安全和幸福而不是他们自己，我感到非常难过。
I was like, oh, my god, no. [SIGHS]
我当时想，哦，天哪，不。 [叹气]
Did they explicitly tell you, don't worry about us?
他们有没有明确告诉你，不用担心我们？
Yes, they always-- and their messages, they said, "Oh, hi.
是的，他们总是——他们的信息是，“哦，嗨。
Good morning.
早上好。
How are you?
你好吗？
How's school?
学校怎么样？
Have a great day.
祝你有美好的一天。
And don't worry about us.
别担心我们。
We're fine."
我们很好。”
In those first few weeks, the 13 students from Gaza were all taking in a constant stream of news.
在最初的几周里，来自加沙的 13 名学生不断收到源源不断的新闻。
Every day they were seeing explosions and rubble and bodies, one horrifying image after another.
他们每天都会看到爆炸、瓦砾和尸体，一幅又一幅可怕的画面。
But when they called their parents, who were in the place where those images were from, they got the same alarming positivity Majd was hearing-- "Hi, honey.
但当他们打电话给他们的父母时，他们就在这些照片的来源地，他们得到了马吉德听到的同样令人震惊的积极情绪——“嗨，亲爱的。
How are you?
你好吗？
We're fine.
我们很好。
How was school?
学校怎么样？
Have a great day." Fatima in Maine calling her parents.
祝你有美好的一天。”缅因州的法蒂玛给她的父母打电话。
They don't ever tell me if they're doing OK or not.
他们从来不告诉我他们做得好不好。
They're just like, "Oh, we're OK.
他们只是说，“哦，我们很好。
Don't worry."
别担心。”
Shahd in Ohio.
俄亥俄州的沙德。
Shahd They were trying to make me feel like all is good, but I know that my parents wouldn't tell me if something bad is actually happening with them.
Shahd 他们试图让我感觉一切都很好，但我知道我的父母不会告诉我他们是否真的发生了不好的事情。
And that point was making me even more scared.
那一点让我更加害怕。
It was making me way much more worried because I know that even if actually something terrible is happening, I wouldn't even know.
这让我更加担心，因为我知道即使真的发生了可怕的事情，我也不会知道。
The kids couldn't go back to Gaza.
孩子们无法返回加沙。
Their parents wanted to protect them, protect their year.
他们的父母想保护他们，保护他们的这一年。
So the YES students watched as some of their homes were destroyed and then their neighborhoods disappeared.
因此，YES 的学生眼睁睁地看着他们的一些房屋被毁，然后他们的社区消失了。
They were part of the war, but they were not part of the war.
他们是战争的一部分，但又不是战争的一部分。
They were in Ohio, and Redding, California, and Snyder, Oklahoma.
他们分别在俄亥俄州、加利福尼亚州雷丁和俄克拉荷马州斯奈德。
They were at soccer practice when their family packed up and fled their home.
当他们一家人收拾行李逃离家时，他们正在足球训练中。
They were in class when they learned their school in Gaza had been flattened.
当他们得知加沙的学校被夷为平地时，他们正在上课。
They were eating at Red Lobster when they worried they'd lost touch with their parents.
当他们在红龙虾餐厅吃饭时，他们担心与父母失去了联系。
Shahd was in the bathroom at school when she saw a message on a group chat.
当沙赫德在学校的卫生间里看到群聊上的一条消息时。
Her friend back in Gaza was dead, killed with his mom and his sister.
她在加沙的朋友死了，与他的母亲和妹妹一起被杀。
She went back to her photography class.
她回到摄影课。
They were in the midst of a group project.
他们正在进行一个小组项目。
We were kind of making a magazine cover, and we had to take pictures of our classmates.
我们当时正在制作杂志封面，我们必须给同学们拍照。
I took a picture of a guy named Caden.
我给一个叫卡登的人拍了一张照片。
He was very friendly.
他非常友好。
I used him to make a rock star magazine.
我用他制作了一本摇滚明星杂志。
He had some curly and frizzy hair, so I thought he would be cool for the scene.
他有一头卷曲的卷发，所以我认为他在这个场景中会很酷。
And I had him wear a leather jacket, and we got an electric guitar from the band.
我让他穿上皮夹克，我们从乐队那里得到了一把电吉他。
And I took a picture of him, and then I just continued working on the magazine.
我给他拍了一张照片，然后继续写杂志。
No, I just didn't want anything to seem like, she's playing victim, or-- you know.
不，我只是不想让事情看起来像，她在扮演受害者，或者——你知道。
I just don't like the hype of pretending to always be sad and always have a negative mood.
我只是不喜欢假装总是悲伤、总是有消极情绪的炒作。
I mean, yeah, I guess it's just me.
我的意思是，是的，我想这只是我。
Because maybe none of them were close to me and none of them were really interested in knowing anything.
因为也许他们中没有一个人跟我很亲近，也没有一个人真正有兴趣了解任何事情。
So I was like, oh, it's fine.
所以我想，哦，没关系。
I can just go back to class.
我可以回去上课了。
And that way, I can just forget.
这样我就可以忘记。
And maybe that would help me if I just practice my life normally.
如果我正常地生活的话，也许这会对我有所帮助。
This became the new imperative for all of them-- practice life normally.
这成为他们所有人的新当务之急——正常地生活。
When Ali's friend was killed, he was in the middle of preparing a biology presentation.
当阿里的朋友被杀时，他正在准备一场生物学演讲。
He went to biology class and did his presentation.
他去上生物课并做了演讲。
It was on elephants.
这是在大象身上。
Aboud saw a video of his best friend pulled from a pile of rubble.
阿布德看到了他最好的朋友从一堆瓦砾中被救出来的视频。
There was a news clip.
有一个新闻剪辑。
He watched his friend on a stretcher.
他看着担架上的朋友。
Aboud went to school, learned his friend's whole family had been killed-- dad, mother, grandparents, sisters.
阿布德去上学，得知他朋友的全家都被杀了——爸爸、妈妈、祖父母、姐妹。
His friend and his youngest brother were the sole survivors.
他的朋友和最小的弟弟是唯一的幸存者。
After school that day, Aboud went to a birthday party for his host sister.
那天放学后，阿布德去参加寄宿妹妹的生日聚会。
She was eight years old.
她八岁了。
He ate cake.
他吃了蛋糕。
Practice life normally.
正常地练习生活。
Keep going.
继续前进。
Present on elephants.
出现在大象身上。
Go to class.
去上课吧。
Ride the bus.
乘坐公共汽车。
Eat cake.
吃蛋糕。
Try to reach your parents on the phone.
尝试通过电话联系您的父母。
Try again.
再试一次。
The cell service in Gaza kept going out.
加沙的手机服务不断中断。
Majd kept trying.
马吉德一直在努力。
I was just very worried about my family, especially, I remember, when Halloween came.
我只是非常担心我的家人，尤其是，我记得，当万圣节来临时。
I didn't talk to them for two weeks straight.
我连续两周没有和他们说话。
And then it was Halloween, and I'm like, oh, my god, I'm dying to talk to them.
然后是万圣节，我想，哦，天哪，我很想和他们说话。
And--
还有——
You hadn't heard from them for two weeks?
你已经两周没有收到他们的消息了？
Yeah, no. But I still had to kind of put a mask on and be happy in front of people.
是的，不。但我还是得戴上面具，在人们面前保持快乐。
For me, as an exchange student here, I still have to be participating in American cultural activities and stuff like that.
对我来说，作为这里的交换生，我仍然必须参加美国的文化活动之类的。
So one of the activities was dressing up for Halloween and going trick or treating.
因此，其中一项活动就是万圣节装扮，玩“不给糖就捣蛋”游戏。
But at the same time, people were dying in Gaza.
但与此同时，加沙的人们正在死亡。
And I'm like, OK, I want to make this quick, but just to still participate and make the family feel that, hey, I would love to participate in something that you do.
我想，好吧，我想尽快做到这一点，但只是为了仍然参与并让家人觉得，嘿，我很乐意参与你所做的事情。
What did you wear?
你穿什么？
Majd Oh, I was Hermione Granger.
马吉德 哦，我是赫敏·格兰杰。
You were Hermione?
你是赫敏？
Majd [LAUGHS] I'm a huge Harry Potter fan.
Majd [笑]我是哈利波特的超级粉丝。
She was practicing life normally.
她过着正常的生活。
Majd shared a video of herself trick-or-treating in costume, running into another Potter fan.
马吉德分享了一段自己穿着戏服玩“不给糖就捣蛋”的视频，结果遇到了另一位波特迷。
Another Harry Potter!
又一个哈利波特！
Trick-or-Treater Yes!
不给糖就捣蛋 是的！
From the moment Majd shared her Halloween post late that night, she could tell things had suddenly changed.
从马吉德那天深夜分享万圣节帖子的那一刻起，她就知道事情突然发生了变化。
The messages on Instagram came in a rush.
Instagram 上的消息来得很匆忙。
A good friend of hers in Gaza--
她在加沙的一个好朋友——
How dare you?
你怎么敢？
People are dying, and you're just living your life.
人们正在死去，而你只是过着自己的生活。
Like, fighting me.
比如，跟我打架。
Like, how dare you post something like that when your people are dying?
就像，当你的人民快要死的时候，你怎么敢发布这样的东西？
And another.
还有另一个。
Majd Oh, my god, I can't believe that I chose you as one of my friends.
Majd 哦，天哪，我简直不敢相信我选择了你作为我的朋友之一。
Don't post any stories as if nothing is happening.
不要发布任何故事，就好像什么都没发生一样。
Why would we blame the people in the West or abroad if our people are doing stuff like this?
如果我们的人民做了这样的事情，我们为什么要责怪西方或国外的人民呢？
There were more, many more.
还有更多、更多。
Where's your loyalty?
你的忠诚度在哪里？
You've betrayed us.
你背叛了我们。
You don't belong to Gaza.
你不属于加沙。
Why aren't you posting more about Palestine?
你为什么不发布更多有关巴勒斯坦的信息？
Majd read every single one.
马吉德读了每一本。
Here they were, 13 Palestinian teenagers trying to have their big, exciting year in America in the midst of the most immense tragedy imaginable.
13 名巴勒斯坦青少年正试图在美国度过他们最重要、最激动人心的一年，但同时也经历了一场可以想象到的最巨大的悲剧。
What would they do?
他们会做什么？
What should they do?
他们应该做什么？
The weight of the war was landing on Majd, a teenager-- the exact moment in time when you were asked to make choices about who you are and who you are not, and when you are the most judged.
战争的重担落在了十几岁的马吉德身上——正是在这个时刻，你被要求做出关于你是谁和你不是谁的选择，也是你受到最严厉评判的时刻。
And the judgment that was hardest for her to take were the comments from people in Gaza.
对她来说最难以接受的判断是来自加沙人民的评论。
Yeah, they just said that you're not one of us anymore, stuff like that.
是的，他们只是说你不再是我们中的一员了之类的话。
And I'm like, why are you guys attacking me?
我就想，你们为什么攻击我？
I'm doing an exchange here.
我在这里做一个交换。
I'm talking about Gaza every chance I can.
我一有机会就谈论加沙。
And people here, they are living in their own bubble, at least high school teenagers.
而这里的人们，他们生活在自己的泡沫中，至少高中青少年是这样。
They don't really look at the news.
他们并不真正看新闻。
They don't know a lot about what's going on.
他们对正在发生的事情了解不多。
So most of their cares would be like, oh, did you watch the newest movie that came out?
所以他们最关心的是，哦，你看过最新上映的电影吗？
And I'm like, I can't really engage with you right now.
我想，我现在无法真正与你互动。
It was very hard.
这非常困难。
You might notice me smiling a lot, but that's my trauma mechanism working.
你可能会注意到我经常微笑，但那是我的创伤机制在起作用。
I had noticed how Majd would smile when talking about her tremendous loss, her fear for her parents and sister, smiling, when she told me her friend was killed, smiling.
我注意到马吉德在谈到她巨大的损失、她对父母和妹妹的恐惧时会微笑，当她告诉我她的朋友被杀时，她微笑着。
It was a little eerie how much you could see the effort to be OK on her face.
有点奇怪的是，你可以看到她脸上为恢复正常所做的努力。
She'd say, everyone hates me-- smile.
她会说，每个人都讨厌我——微笑。
More than 200 friends blocked me-- smile.
超过200个朋友屏蔽了我——微笑。
I lost a lot of friends.
我失去了很多朋友。
It was crazy.
太疯狂了。
I mean, I lost some friends physically.
我的意思是，我在身体上失去了一些朋友。
They're not on Earth anymore.
他们已经不在地球上了。
I lost some really close people that, oh, my god, they were a huge part of my life.
我失去了一些非常亲密的人，哦，天哪，他们是我生活中很重要的一部分。
And it was very hard.
这非常困难。
I completely understood why people were upset that Majd was posting.
我完全理解为什么人们对马吉德的发帖感到不安。
And having spent time with Majd, I completely understood why she was posting.
在与 Majd 相处过一段时间后，我完全理解她发帖的原因。
Majd came here to achieve something.
马吉德来这里是为了有所成就。
She saw posting about her experiences as part of that.
她看到发布有关她的经历的帖子也是其中的一部分。
The program encourages kids to share stuff on social media.
该计划鼓励孩子们在社交媒体上分享东西。
She liked sharing things for all the normal reasons.
出于各种正常的原因，她喜欢分享事物。
It's fun to show off what you're doing.
炫耀你正在做的事情很有趣。
But also for Majd, she saw it as an expectation that she wanted to meet.
但对于 Majd 来说，她也将其视为她想要满足的期望。
So she was especially confused when some of the YES students also seemed upset with her, stopped responding to her messages.
因此，当一些 YES 的学生似乎也对她感到不满，不再回复她的消息时，她尤其感到困惑。
It was very hard.
这非常困难。
I don't have support from Americans.
我没有得到美国人的支持。
I don't have support from Arabs, too, the students.
我也没有得到阿拉伯人和学生的支持。
I'm like, oh, my god, where do I go?
我想，天啊，我该去哪里？
What do I do?
我该怎么办？
November 2023.
2023 年 11 月。
Majd didn't post anything for almost a month, and she focused all her attention on one thing-- her family.
Majd 已经快一个月没有发布任何内容了，她把所有的注意力都集中在一件事上——她的家人。
She went to school, she did her work, but mostly, she pleaded with her parents, when she could reach them, to please get out of Gaza, try to evacuate.
她去上学，她做她的工作，但最重要的是，她恳求她的父母，当她能联系到他们时，请他们离开加沙，尝试撤离。
But her dad didn't want to abandon their home, and they didn't have the money.
但她爸爸不想放弃他们的家，而且他们也没有钱。
Then she lost touch with them for almost three weeks.
然后她与他们失去了联系近三个星期。
She waited to hear from them.
她等待着他们的消息。
And she wondered when she'd hear from the other YES students.
她想知道什么时候才能收到其他 YES 学生的消息。
She figured this was just a little blip.
她认为这只是一个小插曲。
They'd get back in touch.
他们会恢复联系的。
But mostly, it was silence.
但大部分时间都是沉默。
She'd see one of them posting something from their daily life on Instagram and think, so they are posting.
她会看到其中一个人在 Instagram 上发布一些日常生活中的东西，然后就会想，所以他们才发布。
Did that mean they weren't actually mad at her for posting?
这是否意味着他们实际上并没有因为她发帖而生她的气？
But if they weren't mad at her for posting, what happened, then?
但如果他们没有因为她发帖而生她的气，那么会发生什么呢？
Why weren't they in touch with her?
为什么他们不联系她？
She never reached out to ask.
她始终没有伸手去询问。
She just wondered.
她只是想知道。
December 2023.
2023 年 12 月。
Majd was living with a nurse named Tana Rode.
马吉德与一位名叫塔纳·罗德的护士住在一起。
Tana would watch Majd come and go from her room, always clutching her phone, sometimes her eyes puffy and red.
塔娜会看着马吉德进出她的房间，她总是抓着手机，有时她的眼睛浮肿、发红。
Tana tried to keep the fridge stocked with parmesan cheese bagels from Costco.
塔娜试图在冰箱里装满好市多的帕尔马干酪百吉饼。
Majd seemed to like them, and it got her out of her room in the morning.
马吉德似乎很喜欢它们，这让她早上离开了房间。
Tana has a teenage daughter of her own.
塔娜有一个十几岁的女儿。
She was careful with Majd, stayed close, available, but gave Majd her space.
她对马吉德很小心，保持密切关系，随时待命，但也给了马吉德自己的空间。
She's not one who will come down here and cry.
她不是一个会来这里哭泣的人。
I can just sense this heaviness in her, understandably.
我能感觉到她身上的沉重，这是可以理解的。
'Cause she's happy.
因为她很高兴。
She's chatty.
她很健谈。
That girl loves to talk.
那个女孩很爱说话。
So I can feel it when she's down.
所以当她情绪低落时我能感觉到。
Before October 7, Tana Rode knew next to nothing about Israel or Palestine.
10 月 7 日之前，塔纳·罗德对以色列或巴勒斯坦几乎一无所知。
She told me maybe she'd seen a bumper sticker one time.
她告诉我也许她曾经看到过一张保险杠贴纸。
Now she was responsible for this Palestinian kid.
现在她要对这个巴勒斯坦孩子负责。
She read everything she could, tracked the news.
她阅读了所有能读到的资料，追踪新闻。
She followed the numbers.
她跟着数字走。
November, more than 10,000 Palestinians dead.
11月，一万多名巴勒斯坦人死亡。
By Christmas, 20,000.
到圣诞节，20,000。
Tana had a brand new awareness, an alarming awareness, of just how vulnerable Majd's family was.
塔娜对马吉德的家人有多么脆弱有了全新的认识，一种令人震惊的认识。
She worried.
她担心。
Every single day thinking about, am I going to get the call at work?
每天都在想，我会在上班时接到电话吗？
Is today the day that her family's gone?
今天是她家人离开的日子吗？
Like every single day.
就像每一天一样。
And, oh, my god, I don't want to have to tell her.
而且，哦，天哪，我不想告诉她。
Tana, were you imagining this kid is my responsibility if she loses her family?
塔娜，你是否认为如果她失去家人，这个孩子就是我的责任？
Yes.
是的。
Absolutely.
绝对地。
Chana Joffe-Walt Tana wasn't the only host mom who told me this.
Chana Joffe-Walt Tana 并不是唯一告诉我这件事的寄宿妈妈。
Farah's host mom in Oklahoma told me she and her husband sat down together and walked through the different scenarios so they'd know what they were OK offering if they needed to offer.
法拉在俄克拉荷马州的寄宿妈妈告诉我，她和她的丈夫坐在一起，经历了不同的场景，这样他们就会知道，如果他们需要提供什么，他们可以提供什么。
Fatima overheard her host mother call a friend who had hosted a Ukrainian student to ask for advice, just in case.
法蒂玛无意中听到寄宿家庭的母亲打电话给一位接待过乌克兰学生的朋友寻求建议，以防万一。
January 2024.
2024 年 1 月。
Majd told her dad if he wasn't going to leave Gaza for himself, he should at least do it for her younger sister.
马吉德告诉她的父亲，如果他不打算为自己离开加沙，他至少应该为她的妹妹离开。
The argument Majd made, it was very her.
马吉德提出的论点正是她自己的。
Majd told him, she's 12 years old.
Majd 告诉他，她 12 岁了。
She needs to be in school.
她需要上学。
Without an education, what kind of future will she have?
没有学历，她会有怎样的未来？
Her dad relented.
她的父亲态度软化了。
Tana, her host mom, helped Majd to raise money to get her parents out of Gaza.
她的寄宿妈妈塔娜帮助马吉德筹集资金，让她的父母离开加沙。
February, her family made it out of Gaza.
二月，她的家人逃离加沙。
Majd got a message.
马吉德收到一条消息。
I was about to lose hope.
我快要失去希望了。
But then one day, he just called me and said, oh, hey, we're traveling tomorrow.
但有一天，他打电话给我说，哦，嘿，我们明天要去旅行。
What did it feel like when you were like, they are there?
当你觉得他们在那里时，感觉如何？
I literally have no words to describe this.
我简直无法用言语来形容这一点。
It feels like you were just burning in flames, and then somebody put water all over you.
感觉就像你在火焰中燃烧，然后有人把水泼到你身上。
And now, yeah, you're not burning anymore.
现在，是的，你不再燃烧了。
And I just went to school so happy that week.
那一周我很高兴去学校。
It was crazy.
太疯狂了。
Everybody was noticing, even the teachers.
每个人都注意到了，甚至包括老师。
And they said, oh, somebody's got good news here.
他们说，哦，有人有好消息。
What's going on?
这是怎么回事？
[LAUGHS] And, yeah, they were all so happy for me.
[笑]是的，他们都为我感到高兴。
The first half of Majd's year had been dominated by terrifying news from home and nightmares about her family and social isolation.
马吉德上半年的生活充满了来自家里的可怕消息以及有关家庭和社会孤立的噩梦。
She'd been under so much pressure.
她承受的压力太大了。
When this worry for her family lifted, Majd experienced a surge of energy.
当家人的忧虑解除后，马吉德感到精力充沛。
She was giddy.
她头晕目眩。
She wanted to do everything.
她什么都想做。
She wanted to be a kid on the YES program, not just a kid in the midst of a war.
她想成为 YES 计划中的一个孩子，而不仅仅是一个战争中的孩子。
She wanted to be like all the other YES students from all the other countries that she was seeing in her Instagram feed having a normal American year.
她希望像她在 Instagram 上看到的来自其他国家的 YES 学生一样，过一个正常的美国年。
I started to do golf a few days after my parents got out.
我父母出去几天后我开始打高尔夫球。
Everything in life started to be better.
生活中的一切都开始变得更好。
Why golf?
为什么打高尔夫球？
Majd I don't want to do a conventional sport.
Majd 我不想做传统运动。
And I'm really bad at running.
而且我真的不擅长跑步。
So, yeah, I didn't want to be too tired doing a sport, but I still wanted to enjoy it.
所以，是的，我不想做一项运动太累，但我仍然想享受它。
Hey, Robin.
嘿，罗宾。
She's never ridden in a golf cart before.
她以前从未坐过高尔夫球车。
Don't you have golf carts where you're from?
你的家乡没有高尔夫球车吗？
No, we don't have golf.
不，我们没有高尔夫球。
We don't have bowling.
我们没有保龄球。
Nothing.
没有什么。
[LAUGHTER] Man How would I get along over there?
[笑声] 伙计，我在那里相处得怎么样？
I don't know what I'd do.
我不知道我会做什么。
It wasn't just golf.
这不仅仅是高尔夫。
She joined bowling.
她参加了保龄球运动。
She tried tennis.
她尝试过网球。
She went to a Valentine's Day party-- posted.
她去参加了情人节派对——已发布。
(SINGING) We say ooh-wee-oh Wee-oh-wee-oh
（唱歌）我们说噢-噢-噢-噢-噢-噢-噢
A Super Bowl party.
超级碗派对。
Usher (SINGING) Up in the club with my homies
亚瑟（唱歌）和我的朋友们一起去俱乐部
Tryna get a little V-I Chana Joffe-Walt Messed around with helium balloons at a different party.
尝试在另一个聚会上用氦气球搞乱 V-I Chana Joffe-Walt。
Majd was all in.
马吉德全力以赴。
She was saying yes to the life that was in front of her.
她对眼前的生活说“是”。
Sometimes Majd got messages from people who were upset about her posts, but not nearly as many.
有时，马吉德会收到对她的帖子感到不满的人发来的消息，但数量并不多。
And they didn't get under her skin in the same way as before.
而且它们并没有像以前那样激怒她。
Majd showed me endless pictures and videos she took of kids having fun.
马吉德给我看了无数她拍摄的孩子们玩耍的照片和视频。
And she's in these videos.
她就在这些视频中。
She's not just documenting the fun.
她不仅仅是记录乐趣。
She's having fun.
她玩得很开心。
Something I love about Americans is that they love to be very silly.
我喜欢美国人的一点是他们喜欢犯傻。
Like, this is one of my friends.
就像，这是我的一位朋友。
He put the pom-pom on his head.
他把绒球戴在头上。
I did not really understand what she was showing me in this picture, but what I got from it was Majd has friends.
我不太明白她在这张照片中向我展示的是什么，但我从中得到的是马吉德有朋友。
Oh.
哦。
Majd My weekends are pretty full now.
Majd 我的周末现在很充实。
It's crazy.
太疯狂了。
It was stunning to watch Majd rebound like this-- her stamina, grit.
看到马吉德像这样反弹真是令人震惊——她的耐力和勇气。
Just stunning.
简直令人惊叹。
Stunning or concerning?
令人惊叹还是令人担忧？
Sometimes I wasn't sure.
有时我不确定。
All that stuff she just lived through was still living through.
她刚刚经历过的所有事情仍然在经历。
People were still getting bombed.
人们仍然遭到轰炸。
Her parents were in an unstable situation.
她的父母处境不稳定。
Their future-- and hers-- still very unclear.
他们的未来——还有她的——仍然非常不明朗。
Was she just putting all that aside for now?
她只是暂时把这一切放在一边吗？
Was that going to work?
那会起作用吗？
Maybe?
或许？
At least it seemed like a really nice reprieve.
至少这看起来是一次很好的缓刑。
March.
行进。
Sometimes Majd would open Snapchat, and the app would send her a This Time Last Year with a picture of her and the other YES students in Gaza.
有时，Majd 会打开 Snapchat，该应用程序会向她发送一张去年的这个时候的照片，其中附有她和加沙其他 YES 学生的照片。
Back then, they'd all just gotten accepted and were meeting and texting each other, becoming a group.
那时，他们都刚刚被录取，互相见面、发短信，成为一个团体。
She'd get a pang of longing and anxiety.
她会感到一阵渴望和焦虑。
She missed them.
她想念他们。
She'd not heard from them in five months.
她已经五个月没有收到他们的消息了。
Were they all still chatting all the time, just without her?
他们还在一直聊天，只有她不在吗？
Late at night, she'd stare at their profiles in bed, scrolling.
深夜，她会在床上盯着他们的个人资料，滚动。
And then finally, one night--
最后，有一天晚上——
I reached out to one of the girls in the exchange program.
我联系了交换项目中的一位女孩。
And I told her, oh, my god, hi.
我告诉她，哦，天哪，嗨。
How are you?
你好吗？
She started talking to me a little bit in a cold way.
她开始用冷漠的语气跟我说话。
So, yeah, I started being very friendly with her, like, oh, my god, I miss you so much.
所以，是的，我开始对她非常友好，就像，哦，天哪，我非常想念你。
How's your year going?
你这一年过得怎么样？
And I hope your family is safe and everything.
我希望你的家人平安，一切顺利。
And, yeah, she started talking normally.
是的，她开始正常说话了。
And then after two days, she stopped responding.
然后两天后，她就不再回复了。
And I'm like, what did I say?
我想，我说什么了？
Well, what did I do?
嗯，我做了什么？
It got me feeling like all the exchange students are kind of against me, which they probably are, but.
这让我感觉所有的交换生都有点反对我，他们可能确实如此，但是。
They might not be.
他们可能不是。
Majd I mean, maybe not all of them.
我的意思是，也许不是全部。
There are two students that are really amazing, but now they don't really talk.
有两个学生确实很了不起，但现在却不太说话了。
But yeah, it's very confusing.
但是，是的，这非常令人困惑。
There's going to be something going on.
将会有事情发生。
And I'm going to discover that when I see them again in June, so.
当我六月再次见到他们时，我会发现这一点，所以。
In June, when they'd all fly to DC, spend a few days at the State Department for the end of the year program, and then fly home.
六月，他们都会飞往华盛顿，在国务院度过几天的年终计划，然后飞回家。
They couldn't fly home, right?
他们不能飞回家，对吧？
All of the YES students from Gaza started the year planning to go back to Gaza.
所有来自加沙的 YES 学生在新的一年里都计划返回加沙。
They were slowly realizing that was not going to happen.
他们慢慢意识到这不会发生。
The war was not ending.
战争并没有结束。
What was going to happen at the end of the school year?
学年结束时会发生什么？
That's coming up from Chicago Public Radio when our program continues.
当我们的节目继续进行时，芝加哥公共广播电台会播报这一消息。
Act 2 Chana Joffe-Walt It's This American Life.
第二幕 查娜·乔夫-沃尔特 这就是美国生活。
I'm Chana Joffe-Walt, sitting in for Ira Glass.
我是查娜·乔夫-沃尔特 (Chana Joffe-Walt)，代理艾拉·格拉斯 (Ira Glass)。
We're telling the story of a group of 13 students who came to the United States from Gaza last September to do a year of high school in America.
我们讲述的是去年 9 月一群 13 名学生从加沙来到美国，在美国读一年高中的故事。
They're on a program run by the State Department called YES.
他们参与了国务院运行的一个名为 YES 的项目。
We're in April 2024, two months before the end of the YES program.
现在是 2024 年 4 月，距离 YES 计划结束还有两个月。
And then what?
然后呢？
The YES kids were pinning their hopes on this.
YES 的孩子们把希望寄托在这上面。
The year before, the State Department had extended the program for some Ukrainian YES students, gave them another year in the US.
前一年，国务院延长了一些乌克兰 YES 学生的项目，让他们在美国再呆一年。
That's what Majd was hoping for.
这正是马吉德所希望的。
But then the State Department sent letters to the kids saying they would not be extending the program for the 13 students from Gaza.
但随后国务院致函孩子们，称他们不会为来自加沙的 13 名学生延长该计划。
The program would end June 6.
该计划将于 6 月 6 日结束。
You've got to figure everything out by yourself.
一切都得你自己想办法。
And I'm like, we're 16-year-olds.
我想，我们都是 16 岁的人。
We can't just come up with something from thin air.
我们不能凭空想出一些东西。
We need some sort of help.
我们需要某种帮助。
The State Department says it did provide support to students, that the health, safety, and security of all students was their top priority.
美国国务院表示，它确实为学生提供了支持，所有学生的健康、安全和保障是他们的首要任务。
Their goal was to reunite students with their families.
他们的目标是让学生与家人团聚。
And they say they worked closely with them on their post-program plans.
他们表示，他们在项目结束后的计划上与他们密切合作。
They also say they provided an equally rigorous process for exchange students from both Ukraine and Gaza.
他们还表示，他们为来自乌克兰和加沙的交换生提供了同样严格的程序。
But what Majd and the other students from Gaza describe is feeling like they were on their own to come up with a plan.
但马吉德和其他来自加沙的学生描述的是，他们感觉自己必须独自制定一个计划。
Even for Majd, a master planner of her own life, this was a lot.
即使对于马吉德这个自己生活的总体规划者来说，这也已经是很多了。
She looked at her options.
她看着自己的选择。
Her parents didn't think it made sense for her to come to Egypt.
她的父母认为她来埃及没有意义。
Their situation wasn't stable.
他们的处境并不稳定。
Like all Palestinians who fled Gaza, they weren't allowed to work in Egypt.
像所有逃离加沙的巴勒斯坦人一样，他们不被允许在埃及工作。
Everything was incredibly expensive.
一切都非常昂贵。
As of April, her sister wasn't even able to go to school.
截至四月，她姐姐甚至无法上学。
If Majd joined them, it wasn't clear how she'd continue her education in Egypt, if the family could even continue staying there.
如果马吉德加入他们，不清楚她将如何在埃及继续学业，甚至一家人可以继续留在那里。
So Majd frantically searched for boarding schools in the US with scholarships that might be able to extend a student visa in America.
因此，马吉德疯狂地寻找美国的寄宿学校，这些学校有可能能够延长美国学生签证的奖学金。
But the deadlines to apply had passed.
但申请的截止日期已经过去了。
She learned everything she could about immigration law.
她尽其所能地学习了有关移民法的一切知识。
She had relatives in Michigan.
她在密歇根州有亲戚。
She could maybe move in with them.
她也许可以搬去和他们一起住。
But what were the schools like?
但这些学校是什么样的呢？
And how would she get a lawyer and study and live?
她怎样才能找到律师并学习和生活呢？
She ran it over and over in her head.
她在心里一遍又一遍地想这件事。
OK, just say I move in with my relatives in the US and, OK, what next?
好吧，就说我搬去和我在美国的亲戚住在一起，好吧，接下来怎么办？
I don't have the right documents to even get a job.
我什至没有合适的文件来找到工作。
We're not allowed to drive here.
我们这里不准开车。
And I don't have health insurance.
而且我没有健康保险。
My insurance from the State Department ends soon.
我的国务院保险很快就到期了。
And then what am I going to do?
然后我该怎么办？
I talked to my financial literacy teacher.
我和我的金融知识老师交谈过。
She teaches us about insurance and stuff.
她教我们有关保险之类的知识。
She said, oh, you can buy it from Marketplace or something, but I don't work.
她说，哦，你可以从市场或其他地方购买它，但我不工作。
I don't have an income to even pay for an insurance.
我没有收入，连买保险的钱都没有。
So I don't know.
所以我不知道。
This was all of them.
这就是他们的全部。
All 13 teenagers were scrambling to figure out what to do and where to go, calling their parents, talking with the State Department, and casting around randomly for advice, like Fatima.
所有 13 名青少年都像法蒂玛一样，忙着弄清楚该做什么、去哪里，打电话给父母，与国务院交谈，并四处寻求建议。
My friends were trying to help out.
我的朋友们试图提供帮助。
Some of them are like, do you have any people you know in the States?
他们中的一些人会问，你在美国有认识的人吗？
I'm like, I have relatives, but I don't know if it's going to be the right move to move with them.
我想，我有亲戚，但我不知道和他们一起搬家是否正确。
This is you talking to other 15-year-olds, 16-year-olds?
这是你在和其他15岁、16岁的孩子说话吗？
Yeah.
是的。
They just were asking me questions.
他们只是在问我问题。
And then after that, I was like, oh, that might be an option.
在那之后，我想，哦，这可能是一个选择。
Majd met with a lawyer who advised her pro bono.
马吉德会见了一位为她提供无偿建议的律师。
She says the lawyer told her to apply for asylum, move in with her relatives in Michigan, enroll in public school.
她说律师告诉她申请庇护，搬到密歇根州与亲戚同住，并就读公立学校。
There, she could do a senior year again, find scholarships to go to college in the US.
在那里，她可以再次读高四，获得奖学金去美国上大学。
Majd told me, I will not be going back to Gaza.
马吉德告诉我，我不会再回到加沙了。
She sounded a little stunned.
她听上去有点愕然。
Majd and I talked about a lot of devastating things, but this was really the only time I could tell she was taking in the meaning of what she was saying.
马吉德和我谈论了很多毁灭性的事情，但这确实是我唯一一次可以看出她正在理解她所说的话的含义。
It would be nearly impossible for her to leave the US while she waited for asylum.
在等待庇护期间，她几乎不可能离开美国。
She had a new plan that she laid out for me.
她为我制定了一个新计划。
And at first, she had that eerie smile.
起初，她脸上挂着那种怪异的微笑。
But then it disappeared.
但后来它就消失了。
It just breaks my heart that a place where I grew up in, I just-- I just can't see that again.
令我心碎的是，在我长大的地方，我再也看不到那个地方了。
And the lawyer said that it's going to take from 7 to 10 years, at least, to get to an asylum interview because of the lack of asylum officers here in Washington.
律师表示，由于华盛顿缺乏庇护官员，至少需要 7 到 10 年的时间才能获得庇护面谈。
And I'm like, are you telling me I have to wait 7 to 10 years?
我想，你是说我必须等 7 到 10 年吗？
I'm going to be graduating and having my whole career and life here until I get to an interview?
我即将毕业，并在这里度过我的整个职业生涯和生活，直到我接受面试？
And then I have to wait again to get the result?
然后我还要再等一下才能得到结果吗？
Yeah.
是的。
And imagine not seeing my family all of that time.
想象一下那段时间看不到我的家人。
It's crazy.
太疯狂了。
I'm 16 now.
我现在16岁了。
I'm imagining, like, OK, let's calculate just 10 years.
我在想象，好吧，让我们计算一下 10 年。
I'm going to be at least 26 when I see them again.
当我再次见到他们时，我至少已经26岁了。
And, yeah, for me, I'm just telling you this.
是的，对我来说，我只是告诉你这一点。
But, yeah, I still don't process that because both of my parents, they have chronic-- oh, my god.
但是，是的，我仍然无法接受这一点，因为我的父母都患有慢性病——哦，天啊。
I don't want to go into that aspect.
我不想讨论这方面。
But they have chronic illnesses, and who knows in 10 years if they're still going to be around or not?
但他们患有慢性疾病，谁知道 10 年后他们是否还会存在？
Oh, my god, this is hard.
哦，天哪，这太难了。
[SIGHS]
[叹气]
Yeah, that's super hard.
是的，这太难了。
Majd [SIGHS] Yeah, so I'm going to see my sister when she's at least 23 years old.
Majd [叹气] 是的，所以当我姐姐至少 23 岁的时候我要去见她。
That's crazy.
太疯狂了。
[SNIFFLING]
[抽鼻子]
Chana Joffe-Walt Majd puts her head down and starts sort of laughing.
查娜·乔菲-沃尔特·马吉德低下头，开始大笑。
Tell me if you need a break or if it's too much.
告诉我你是否需要休息或者休息时间是否太多。
OK?
好的？
Do you want to order food?
您想订餐吗？
Chana Joffe-Walt Sure.
查纳·乔夫-沃尔特 当然。
Are you hungry?
你饿了吗？
Yes, she is.
是的，她是。
And yes, she does need a break.
是的，她确实需要休息一下。
Majd would not be going back to Gaza.
马吉德不会再回到加沙。
This year in America was not a year.
今年在美国不是一年。
It was her life.
这是她的生活。
[CAR DOOR SHUTTING] May.
[车门关闭] 五月。
Tana, Majd's host mom, is driving her to Seattle.
马吉德的寄宿妈妈塔娜正开车送她去西雅图。
Majd is going for an overnight with friends.
马吉德要和朋友一起过夜。
When she was back home in Gaza, Majd would come home after school and find her mom.
当她回到加沙的家中时，马吉德放学后会回家找到她的妈妈。
She'd sit down wherever her mom was-- in the living room or the kitchen-- and talk.
无论她妈妈在哪里，无论是客厅还是厨房，她都会坐下来聊天。
She'd talk about her day, her thoughts, her problems.
她会谈论她的一天、她的想法和她的问题。
She could go on and on until her mom usually kicked her out, telling her, OK, that's enough already.
她可以一直这样说下去，直到她妈妈通常把她赶出去，告诉她，好吧，已经够了。
I've been listening to you talk for three hours.
我已经听你讲了三个小时了。
In Bremerton, when Majd talks like this, it's either to the school nurse, Ms. Caroline, or Tana.
在布雷默顿，当马吉德这样说话时，要么是对学校护士卡罗琳女士，要么是塔娜。
She's in the front seat, texting and also talking at rapid speed.
她坐在前座，一边快速地发短信，一边说话。
She's jumping from topic to topic, telling Tana, "One of my teachers has been out for two weeks.
她从一个话题跳到另一个话题，告诉塔娜：“我的一位老师已经出去两周了。
There's like an intern teaching us or something.
就像一个实习生教我们什么的。
Ugh, I should have had breakfast this morning.
呃，今天早上我应该吃早餐的。
Did I tell you I'm running for prom court?"
我有告诉过你我要竞选舞会场地吗？”
I don't know why I came up with that idea.
我不知道为什么我会产生这个想法。
Oh, my god.
我的天啊。
I don't know.
我不知道。
It's so embarrassing for me to just ask people, oh, vote for me.
对我来说，只要求人们投票给我真是太尴尬了。
Yeah, that's something I don't do.
是的，那是我不做的事。
Yeah.
是的。
That's how you get what you want in life.
这就是你如何得到你想要的生活。
Just ask for it.
就问吧。
[SIGHS] I don't want to be queen or anything, but at least on the court, you know?
[叹气]我不想成为女王或其他什么，但至少在球场上，你知道吗？
She tells Tana, "I probably won't get it.
她告诉塔娜：“我可能不会明白。
I'm not exactly your typical pick." But, Majd says, recently, people seem so interested in her.
我不完全是你的典型选择。”但是，马吉德说，最近人们似乎对她很感兴趣。
She thinks it might be because college students are protesting the war in Gaza.
她认为这可能是因为大学生正在抗议加沙战争。
It's all over the news.
新闻里都是这样的。
Kids in her high school suddenly know about Gaza.
她高中的孩子们突然知道了加沙。
It's just that a lot of people come up to me and saying, oh, god.
只是很多人来找我说，哦，上帝。
Yeah, I understand what you're going through, or, I feel for you.
是的，我理解你正在经历的事情，或者说，我对你有感觉。
And if you need to talk to someone, I'm here.
如果您需要与某人交谈，我就在这里。
People are starting to be really nice about it.
人们开始对此非常友善。
Yeah, actually, some girl, a while ago, she came up to me and gave me a teddy bear for, like, oh, my god.
是的，实际上，不久前，有一个女孩走过来给了我一只泰迪熊，就像，哦，天哪。
Hey, I feel for you.
嘿，我对你有感觉。
I sent you that picture.
我把那张照片发给你了。
Yes, you did.
是的，你做到了。
Majd And yeah, I was like, oh, my god, thank you so much, you know?
马吉德：是的，我当时想，哦，天啊，非常感谢你，你知道吗？
Majd tells Tana she was up late last night worrying about seeing the other YES students from Gaza in DC.
马吉德告诉塔娜，她昨晚睡得很晚，担心在华盛顿见到来自加沙的其他 YES 学生。
She just realized how soon it is.
她这才意识到时间已经过去多久了。
"I'm going to find out why they all stopped talking to me," she says.
“我要找出他们为什么不再跟我说话，”她说。
"Ugh, who's my roommate going to be?" There's a pause.
“呃，谁是我的室友呢？”有一个停顿。
Majd stares out the window.
马吉德盯着窗外。
And then--
然后——
The other day, I was talking to my mom.
那天，我和妈妈聊天。
And I don't know why I said something so randomly.
我也不知道为什么我会这么随意地说一些话。
But I just started crying out of nowhere because I didn't remember how the inside of our fridge looked like.
但我突然开始哭泣，因为我不记得冰箱内部是什么样子。
You don't?
你不这么认为吗？
Majd No, I don't remember anything from our house now.
马吉德 不，我现在不记得我们家里的任何事情了。
It's crazy.
太疯狂了。
I remember how it looks like, yeah, but the details of it, they're so blurry now.
我记得它的样子，是的，但是它的细节，现在太模糊了。
Another pause.
又是一次停顿。
Majd How long is this going to go for, you know?
马吉德 这要持续多久，你知道吗？
I don't know.
我不知道。
They pull into Seattle.
他们驶入西雅图。
Majd hops out, throws her backpack on.
马吉德跳下车，背上背包。
Her attention swings from Gaza back to America.
她的注意力从加沙转向美国。
And maybe this is just how she's going to keep dealing with all this-- dipping into the sadness for a minute and then flipping back.
也许这就是她继续处理这一切的方式——沉浸在悲伤中一分钟，然后又回来。
She goes to her sleepover.
她去过夜。
They visit the Space Needle.
他们参观太空针塔。
She watches Star Wars for the first time.
她第一次看星球大战。
It was very fun.
非常有趣。
Yeah, we did like a Star Wars marathon.
是的，我们确实喜欢星球大战马拉松。
[LAUGHS] It's like 10 hours or something, isn't it?
[笑] 大概需要 10 个小时左右，不是吗？
How many hours is that?
那是多少小时？
12, something like that.
12、类似这样的事情。
Yeah, it was amazing.
是的，太棒了。
We stayed up all night, eating.
我们一夜没睡，一边吃饭。
Yeah.
是的。
Chana Joffe-Walt That same week, Majd went to prom.
查纳·乔夫-沃尔特 同一周，马吉德去参加舞会。
And she won prom court.
她赢得了舞会法庭。
June.
六月。
Majd is leaving Washington State, heading to DC.
马吉德即将离开华盛顿州，前往华盛顿特区。
She's thinking about her year and about seeing the other students, just thinking.
她正在想着她的这一年以及见到其他学生，只是想着。
And she has a new theory about why they're not in touch.
对于他们为何不联系，她有一个新的理论。
She thinks it goes back to when they first met, back in Gaza, when they all got into the YES Program.
她认为这可以追溯到他们在加沙第一次见面时，当时他们都加入了 YES 计划。
Before I came to the US, I was just very academic-oriented.
在我来美国之前，我只是非常注重学术。
Yeah, I only focused on my studies.
是的，我只专注于我的学业。
I mean, I still do here.
我的意思是，我仍然在这里。
But, yeah, that can be a factor of why they didn't really like me that much.
但是，是的，这可能是他们不太喜欢我的一个因素。
Like they thought you were too obsessed with school?
就像他们认为你太沉迷于学校一样？
Mm-hmm.
嗯嗯。
Yeah, I kind of talked about it a little too much.
是的，我有点谈论太多了。
Yeah.
是的。
Like scholarships and academics in general.
就像一般的奖学金和学术一样。
Yeah, I know.
是的，我知道。
It's hard to see yourself from other people's point of views.
从别人的角度来看自己是很难的。
Yeah.
是的。
But you had that realization without anyone telling you that?
但你在没有人告诉你的情况下就意识到了这一点？
Yeah, nobody ever told me that.
是的，从来没有人告诉过我这一点。
I mean, it would have helped so much if somebody actually pointed that out so I could notice.
我的意思是，如果有人真的指出这一点，这样我就能注意到，那会有很大帮助。
Yeah, how did you get there?
是啊，你是怎么到那里的？
Majd All this last month, when my friends were just saying goodbye to me, and we're hanging out a lot, they're saying, oh, my god, you're such a fun person.
Majd 上个月发生的这一切，当我的朋友们刚刚向我告别时，我们经常出去玩，他们说，哦，天哪，你真是个有趣的人。
Or, like, one of my friends signed my yearbook.
或者，就像我的一位朋友在我的年鉴上签名一样。
And he said, "Everybody's lucky to have you as a friend in their life." And I'm like, oh my god, this feels so weird.
他说：“每个人都很幸运，一生中有你这样的朋友。”我想，天哪，这感觉太奇怪了。
But then I realized that, hey, I actually am a fun person here in the US.
但后来我意识到，嘿，我在美国实际上是一个有趣的人。
Yeah, I'm not the same as I was in Gaza.
是的，我和在加沙时不一样了。
I'm even remembering when you said to me that you were trying to yell like Americans do, but you couldn't make yourself do it.
我什至记得你对我说你想像美国人那样大喊大叫，但你无法让自己这么做。
You remember that?
你还记得吗？
Yeah.
是的。
Yeah, I could not bring myself to be silly at any time, but now it's just like, yeah, I'm chilling.
是的，我任何时候都不能让自己变得愚蠢，但现在就像是，是的，我很冷。
Yesterday, I was just chilling and watching cartoons.
昨天，我只是在看动画片。
I went down to Washington, DC, to talk to the other YES kids.
我前往华盛顿特区与其他 YES 孩子交谈。
This terrible year was ending here, strangely.
这可怕的一年就这样结束了，奇怪的是。
[CHATTER] Hundreds of teenagers from all over the world fill an auditorium at the State Department.
[闲聊]来自世界各地的数百名青少年挤满了国务院的礼堂。
Lots of lanyards and hugs.
很多挂绳和拥抱。
All the different countries are vying for any open space to take a group photo.
各个国家都在争夺拍摄合影的空地。
The Ghanaians are really going to have to sort out which camera everyone is supposed to look at.
加纳人确实必须弄清楚每个人都应该看哪台摄像机。
The staff is trying to get everyone seated.
工作人员正在努力让每个人都坐下。
Good morning, and welcome, YES students.
早上好，欢迎各位 YES 的同学。
And congratulations on a successful year.
并祝贺您今年取得成功。
Let's give you all round of applause, just to get started.
让我们用热烈的掌声来开始吧。
Woo-hoo!
呜呼！
[APPLAUSE] Chana Joffe-Walt But the 13 kids from Gaza are not here.
[掌声] Chana Joffe-Walt 但是来自加沙的 13 个孩子不在这里。
They're in a separate building by themselves with a counselor.
他们和辅导员一起住在一栋单独的大楼里。
And I'm not allowed there.
而且我不被允许在那里。
They have a different program because unlike the other kids, they are not going home.
他们有一个不同的计划，因为与其他孩子不同，他们不会回家。
The hundreds of other YES students are celebrating their achievements.
其他数百名 YES 学生正在庆祝他们的成就。
They're standing up one by one.
他们一一站起来。
A kid from Pakistan says his favorite part of the year was Christmas.
一名来自巴基斯坦的孩子说他一年中最喜欢的部分是圣诞节。
He got to go caroling with his host family in California.
他必须和加利福尼亚州的寄宿家庭一起唱颂歌。
It was amazing.
太棒了。
A girl from Kosovo says she played basketball for the first time.
一名来自科索沃的女孩说她第一次打篮球。
I actually got to be in the senior night also with all of the varsity girls.
事实上，我还必须和所有大学女生一起参加高四之夜。
Latoya from Liberia won an award for debate.
来自利比里亚的拉托亚获得了辩论奖。
Danielle from Indonesia got awarded the most spirited cheerleader ever.
来自印度尼西亚的丹妮尔被授予有史以来最有活力的啦啦队长奖。
Zan from the Philippines was cast as the lead in two school plays.
来自菲律宾的赞在两部学校戏剧中担任主角。
Now, before I came to America, I didn't really know what theater was.
现在，在我来美国之前，我并不真正知道戏剧是什么。
I didn't know that I was going to fall in love with it.
我不知道我会爱上它。
But my host dad was a theater teacher, and he introduced me to many musicals and many plays.
但我的寄宿爸爸是一位戏剧老师，他向我介绍了许多音乐剧和戏剧。
And I was lovestruck.
而我却陷入了爱情。
Lovestruck, basically.
基本上是痴情了。
And--
还有——
Finally-- Woman I wish you all safe travel home, big hugs with your family, and we hope you come back again on another program in the future.
最后——女士，祝大家平安回家，与家人拥抱，我们希望你们将来能再次参加另一个节目。
Thank you.
谢谢。
[APPLAUSE, CHEERING] Chana Joffe-Walt I did manage to talk to many of the 13 students from Gaza over the next several weeks, and I got an answer to the question Majd had obsessed over all year-- what happened?
[掌声、欢呼] Chana Joffe-Walt 在接下来的几周里，我确实与来自加沙的 13 名学生中的许多人进行了交谈，我得到了 Majd 一年来一直困扰的问题的答案 - 发生了什么？
Why did they all go quiet?
为什么他们都安静了？
It's true, some of them did find her focus on achievement annoying.
确实，他们中的一些人确实觉得她对成就的关注很烦人。
Some of them had issues with some of her posts.
其中一些人对她的一些帖子有疑问。
But that is not what happened.
但事实并非如此。
Aboud, the friend Majd applied with, the very first person she called when she got into the YES Program, he went to Minnesota.
马吉德的朋友阿布德（Aboud）是她加入 YES 计划后第一个打电话联系的人，他去了明尼苏达州。
And he told me after he learned his friend's family had been killed, after watching a video of his friend pulled out of the rubble, he kept going through the motions for a little while, but then--
他告诉我，当他得知他朋友的家人被杀后，在观看了他的朋友从废墟中被救出来的视频后，他继续走过场一段时间，但后来——
I just couldn't.
我就是做不到。
It was in my eyes.
它就在我的眼里。
The tears were in my eyes.
我的眼里含着泪水。
I remember I cried.
我记得我哭了。
I cried at night.
我晚上哭了。
And I did the day after and the day after.
我在后天和后天都做了。
I didn't want to talk to anybody.
我不想和任何人说话。
I didn't want to see anybody.
我不想见任何人。
I didn't want to get out of bed.
我不想起床。
Didn't want to interact with anybody.
不想和任何人交往。
I just wanted to not be.
我只是不想这样。
Eventually, Aboud says emotional numbness kicked in and never really went away.
阿布德说，最终，情绪麻木开始出现，并且从未真正消失。
It's like a black hole.
它就像一个黑洞。
It's sometimes just sucking all of your organs in, and sometimes it's just looming.
有时它只是将你所有的器官吸进去，有时它只是若隐若现。
Yeah, this is kind of how I feel it.
是的，这就是我的感受。
Were you in touch with the other Gazan exchange students during that time?
那段时间你和其他加沙交换生有联系吗？
At least I tried to contact them a few times to tell them like, hey, how are you?
至少我尝试联系他们几次，告诉他们，嘿，你好吗？
If you need anything, I'm here for you.
如果你需要什么，我就在这里为你服务。
But deep down, I knew I was just saying this to say this because I couldn't tolerate.
但内心深处，我知道我之所以这么说只是因为我无法容忍。
You couldn't actually be there for them.
你实际上不可能在他们身边。
Yeah.
是的。
And that's something I'm not very proud of.
这是我不太自豪的事情。
Sometimes I would ghost people because I didn't have the capacity to deal with people.
有时我会幽灵般地与人打交道，因为我没有能力与人打交道。
The whole year, Majd had wondered the most natural 16-year-old question-- what is everyone thinking about me?
整整一年，马吉德都在思考 16 岁孩子最自然的问题——每个人都在想我什么？
The answer is they weren't thinking of her.
答案是他们没有想到她。
Here's Shahd.
这是沙赫德。
She was in Ohio.
她在俄亥俄州。
I don't know.
我不知道。
I believe everyone was just too much focused on their own drama.
我相信每个人都太专注于自己的戏剧了。
I mean, I was focused on my host family.
我的意思是，我专注于我的寄宿家庭。
If they see me talking to someone in Arabic, they would make a huge deal.
如果他们看到我用阿拉伯语与某人交谈，他们就会大做一笔。
So I was like, no, I'm going to limit that.
所以我想，不，我要限制这一点。
And then I was focused too much about knowing if my parents were alive or dead, and then focusing about how I'm going to manage to make friends in high school with people who don't even like my identity, and then fighting with my US history teacher so he could make me present about my country.
然后我太专注于知道我的父母是活着还是死了，然后专注于我如何在高中与那些甚至不喜欢我的身份的人交朋友，然后与我的美国历史老师争吵，这样他就可以让我介绍我的国家。
It was mainly just everyone so much focusing on their drama that no one actually had the time or even thought about just talking to each other.
主要是每个人都太专注于他们的戏剧，以至于没有人真正有时间甚至没有想过只是互相交谈。
I was even scared to ask them what their situation of their family was because I didn't want to hear someone saying that, oh, my brother died, or, oh, my cousin was shot, or something like that.
我什至不敢问他们的家庭状况如何，因为我不想听到有人说，哦，我哥哥死了，或者，哦，我表弟被枪杀了，或者类似的话。
Because I always felt like-- I mean, in my mind, I'm going to go and tell him or talk to them about what's going on with my family, but they could be going through something worse.
因为我总觉得——我的意思是，在我看来，我要去告诉他或与他们谈论我的家人发生的事情，但他们可能正在经历更糟糕的事情。
This, I heard again and again.
这句话，我听了一遍又一遍。
Things were bad for me, but I didn't want to tell anyone about it because it could have been worse for someone else.
事情对我来说很糟糕，但我不想告诉任何人，因为对其他人来说可能会更糟。
So they didn't talk.
所以他们没有说话。
Majd was alone in her experience, and so were all of them.
马吉德是一个人有这样的经历，其他人也是如此。
They all went through a terrible thing separately.
他们都分别经历了一件可怕的事情。
And then they continued on alone.
然后他们继续独自前行。
Farah and Fatima went to Egypt to be with their parents.
法拉和法蒂玛前往埃及与父母团聚。
They are both right now trying to figure out how to enroll in school there, which involves finding money and being sent from one government office to another, asked to provide paperwork from educational institutions that no longer exist.
他们现在都在试图弄清楚如何在那里入学，这涉及到筹集资金并从一个政府办公室送到另一个政府办公室，并被要求提供已不复存在的教育机构的文件。
Ali is applying for asylum, like Majd.
阿里和马吉德一样正在申请庇护。
Aboud and Shahd both got into boarding school in the United States, Aboud in rural New Mexico.
阿布德和沙赫德都进入了美国的寄宿学校，阿布德位于新墨西哥州的乡村。
When I asked what he knew about what it was like there, he said, have you seen The Shining, you know, the castle?
当我问他对那里的情况了解多少时，他说，你看过《闪灵》，你知道，那座城堡吗？
That's what it looks like.
看起来就是这样。
They were supposed to be a crew, the YES '24 group.
他们应该是一个船员，YES '24 团体。
They were supposed to take a group picture and add it to the end of their Instagram highlights and then travel home and hug their parents and present about their experiences in classrooms-- mini celebrities in a place most of them expected to live the rest of their lives.
他们应该拍一张集体照，并将其添加到 Instagram 精彩集锦的末尾，然后回家拥抱父母，讲述他们在课堂上的经历——他们中的大多数人都希望在这个地方度过余生，成为小名人。
They were supposed to be the group of alumni on stage in high school auditoriums in Gaza, telling the younger kids, you got to go.
他们本来应该是加沙高中礼堂舞台上的一群校友，告诉年幼的孩子，你必须走了。
It'll change your life.
它会改变你的生活。
Majd is in Michigan now.
马吉德现在在密歇根州。
She's moved in with her relatives.
她搬去和她的亲戚住在一起。
How is it?
如何？
Majd It's been a little weird.
马吉德 这有点奇怪。
The culture definitely is different here.
这里的文化肯定是不同的。
Like, what kind of thing?
比如，什么样的事情？
Majd I mean, family gatherings and the kinds of foods that they make and going to the mosques, seeing the community and everyone.
Majd 我的意思是，家庭聚会和他们制作的食物种类，以及去清真寺、参观社区和每个人。
And, yeah, it all reminds me of home.
是的，这一切都让我想起了家。
I find myself very sad and even crying sometimes because I want to be doing these things with my own family.
我发现自己很伤心，有时甚至会哭泣，因为我想和自己的家人一起做这些事情。
Majd sounds so much older to me ever since she arrived in Michigan.
自从 Majd 来到密歇根后，我觉得她老了很多。
There's less of the urgent, hyper kid.
急躁、亢奋的孩子少了。
She's sad sometimes, but she sounds solid.
她有时很悲伤，但听起来很坚强。
She's talking about what happened last year, in Arabic, talking about her family with people who actually know her family.
她用阿拉伯语谈论去年发生的事情，与真正认识她家人的人谈论她的家人。
It's enough like home at her aunt's house that it's not really possible for her to set everything aside.
姨妈家已经够像家了，她不可能把一切都抛在一边。
She has to find a place for it.
她得给它找个地方。
She's noticing when she smiles as she's saying sad things, trying not to do that.
当她在说悲伤的事情时微笑着，她注意到了这一点，并试图不这样做。
She started therapy.
她开始接受治疗。
And she started school again.
她又开始上学了。
She needs more credits to graduate.
她需要更多学分才能毕业。
Majd is doing another senior year, a senior year she never planned on.
马吉德又要读四年级了，这是她从未计划过的一年。
This time, she's not trying to make it perfect.
这一次，她并没有试图让它变得完美。
["THIS MUST BE THE PLACE" BY KISHI BASHI]
[“这一定是这个地方”作者：岸桥]
Credits Chana Joffe-Walt Today's program was produced by Miki Meek and edited by Nancy Updike.
鸣谢 Chana Joffe-Walt 今天的节目由 Miki Meek 制作，Nancy Updike 编辑。
The people who put together today's show include Jendayi Bonds, Sean Cole, Dana Chivvis, Michael Comite, Aviva DeKornfeld, Emmanuel Dzotsi, Henry Larson, Tobin Low, Katherine Rae Mondo, Stowe Nelson, Nadia Reiman, Marisa Robertson-Textor, Ryan Rumery, Amelia Schonbek, Frances Swanson, Christopher Swetala, Matt Tierney, Julie Whitaker, and Diane Wu.
今天节目的制作人包括 Jendayi Bonds、Sean Cole、Dana Chivvis、Michael Comite、Aviva DeKornfeld、Emmanuel Dzotsi、Henry Larson、Tobin Low、Katherine Rae Mondo、Stowe Nelson、Nadia Reiman、Marisa Robertson-Textor、Ryan Rumery、Amelia Schonbek、Frances Swanson、Christopher Swetala、Matt Tierney、Julie惠特克和黛安·吴。
Our managing editor is Sarah Abdurrahman.
我们的总编辑是萨拉·阿卜杜拉赫曼 (Sarah Abdurrahman)。
Our senior editor is David Kestenbaum.
我们的高级编辑是大卫·凯斯滕鲍姆。
Our executive editor is Emanuele Berry.
我们的执行编辑是 Emanuele Berry。
Special thanks today to Hany Hawasly, Eli Saslow, Michelle Navarro, Safiyah Riddle, Milca De Paz, Amalia Campbell, Reba Myall-Martin, Racceb Arikew, Chris Page, Jennie Hester, and the Snyder Methodist Church, and all the parents of all the YES students and their host families in America who spoke with us.
今天特别感谢 Hany Hawasly、Eli Saslow、Michelle Navarro、Safiyah Riddle、Milca De Paz、Amalia Campbell、Reba Myall-Martin、Racceb Arikew、Chris Page、Jennie Hester 和斯奈德卫理公会教堂，以及所有与我们交谈的 YES 学生的家长和他们在美国的寄宿家庭。
Our website, thisamericanlife.org.
我们的网站 thisamericanlife.org。
You can stream our archive of over 800 episodes for absolutely free.
您可以完全免费地观看我们的 800 多集档案。
This American Life is delivered to public radio stations by PRX, the Public Radio Exchange.
《美国生活》由公共广播电台 PRX 向公共广播电台播出。
Thanks, as always, to our boss, Ira Glass.
一如既往地感谢我们的老板艾拉·格拉斯 (Ira Glass)。
He's actually visiting Torey Malatia this week.
他实际上本周正在访问托里·马拉蒂亚。
We have separation anxiety.
我们有分离焦虑。
We have to be together.
我们必须在一起。
Weirdly, Ira said someone named Mark has been keeping them apart.
奇怪的是，艾拉说一个名叫马克的人一直在把他们分开。
I'm like, Mark, please let us be together.
我想，马克，请让我们在一起吧。
I'm Chana Joffe-Walt.
我是查娜·乔夫-沃尔特。
Join us next week for more stories of This American Life.
下周加入我们，了解更多关于《美国生活》的故事。
["THIS MUST BE THE PLACE" BY KISHI BASHI]
[“这一定是这个地方”作者：岸桥]
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。