69: Dream House - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #69 | June 29, 2007 69: Dream House Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 69 集 | June 29, 2007 69: Dream House Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.
如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Commune Dream House Ira Glass It wasn't Amanda's dream house, it was her mom's.
公社梦想之家 Ira Glass 这不是阿曼达的梦想之家，而是她妈妈的。
And it wasn't one you would usually think of as a dream house.
And it wasn't one you would usually think of as a dream house.
500 people living in a 10-story building, dorm style, right in the middle of the city.
500 people living in a 10-story building, dorm style, right in the middle of the city.
We were supposed to come for a four-day visit, and it turned into a two-week visit, and then a month visit.
We were supposed to come for a four-day visit, and it turned into a two-week visit, and then a month visit.
And then we lived here.
然后我们就住在这里了。
So I never really got to go back and say goodbye to my friends or anything.
所以我从来没有真正回去和我的朋友或其他什么东西说再见。
And I was really mad at my mother for doing that to me and all this type of stuff.
我真的很生妈妈的气，因为她对我做了这些事。
And I was just really mad at everybody and didn't like it here at all.
And I was just really mad at everybody and didn't like it here at all.
Where they moved is an experiment in communal living that, at the time, had been going on for 25 years in Chicago.
Where they moved is an experiment in communal living that, at the time, had been going on for 25 years in Chicago.
Nobody owns private property, everything is shared.
没有人拥有私有财产，一切都是共享的。
The TVs, the cars, everything.
电视，汽车，一切。
If you need pocket change, you go to a room called "the money office." And if they've got cash, they'll give it to you.
如果你需要零钱，你可以去一个叫做“钱办公室”的房间。如果他们有现金，他们就会给你。
Remember, this is 500 people.
请记住，这是 500 人。
And if all this is beginning to sound like a big socialist collective in the middle of a modern American city, let me add just one more fact to make this picture complete for you.
And if all this is beginning to sound like a big socialist collective in the middle of a modern American city, let me add just one more fact to make this picture complete for you.
The community?
社区？
It's Christian.
这是基督教的。
Run by a group called Jesus People USA.
由一个名为“Jesus People USA”的团体运营。
All I did was sit up in my room and just stare out the window.
我所做的只是坐在房间里，盯着窗外。
I did not come down to eat or anything.
我没有下来吃饭或做任何事。
I just sat there and stared out the window because I was so angry that I was just going to kill anybody that bothered me.
我只是坐在那里，盯着窗外，因为我太生气了，我只想杀死任何困扰我的人。
And I did that for the first few days, like, the first three days.
最初几天，比如前三天，我就是这样做的。
At 16, a year and a half after they first moved to this community, Amanda says that she doesn't think of herself as a Christian anymore, which, understandably, upsets her mother, who moved here partly so that Amanda would live in a Christian environment and learn Christian values.
At 16, a year and a half after they first moved to this community, Amanda says that she doesn't think of herself as a Christian anymore, which, understandably, upsets her mother, who moved here partly so that Amanda would live in a Christian environment and learn Christian values.
It's kind of a tense subject between them.
他们之间这是一个紧张的话题。
Like if I was in church and I didn't take Communion or something, then all that day I'd ask her questions.
就像如果我在教堂里并且没有领圣餐之类的东西，那么一整天我都会问她问题。
She's like, "I just can't think right now.
她说：“我现在无法思考。
I can't imagine you going to hell," and all this type of stuff.
我无法想象你会下地狱，”以及诸如此类的事情。
So I think she's really concerned about me, but she's just going to have to live with it.
所以我认为她真的很关心我，但她只能忍受这一点。
In a way, this story is not so unusual.
从某种意义上说，这个故事并不罕见。
How many of our parents move somewhere, some dream house, some vision of a new life in a new place, moving the family with them, settling new suburbs, migrating because of layoffs and divorces, and just hoping that it's going to work out for the kids in the long run?
How many of our parents move somewhere, some dream house, some vision of a new life in a new place, moving the family with them, settling new suburbs, migrating because of layoffs and divorces, and just hoping that it's going to work out for the kids in the long run?
Though kids, of course, are all about the short run.
当然，尽管孩子们都是短期的。
Amanda isn't happy at the Jesus People community, but she is the exception.
阿曼达在耶稣人民社区并不满意，但她是例外。
Most of the teenagers living there actually seem to like it a lot.
大多数住在那里的青少年实际上似乎很喜欢它。
And like any good parent, Amanda's mom did consult with her about the move.
And like any good parent, Amanda's mom did consult with her about the move.
Amanda even agreed to move.
阿曼达甚至同意搬家。
Though, the final decision wasn't really hers.
不过，最终的决定并不是她的。
That's one thing I really get angry with is I don't feel like I can make my own choices a lot of times.
我真正生气的一件事是我觉得很多时候我无法做出自己的选择。
But that's what happens when you're 16 I guess.
但我想这就是你16岁时会发生的事情。
Everyone's like, well, that's just being a teenager.
每个人都会说，好吧，这只是一个青少年。
And I'm like, it stinks.
我想，它很臭。
I hate being a teenager.
我讨厌自己是个青少年。
From WBEZ Chicago, it's This American Life , distributed by Public Radio International.
来自芝加哥 WBEZ 的《This American Life》，由国际公共广播电台发行。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, we choose some theme, invite a variety of writers, and documentary producers, and performers to tackle that theme.
每周在我们的节目中，我们都会选择一些主题，邀请各种作家、纪录片制片人和表演者来解决该主题。
Today's show, Dream House.
今天的节目是《梦想屋》。
Stories about parents who had some utopian vision for their family's future and who built their dream houses to try to realize that future.
故事讲述了父母对家庭的未来抱有乌托邦式的愿景，并建造了自己梦想的房子来试图实现这个未来。
Act One, Meema's Adventure.
第一幕，米玛的冒险。
In that act, a family dreams of life in rural Maine, moves there, and then, well, things start to get very complicated.
在那一幕中，一个家庭梦想着缅因州乡村的生活，搬到那里，然后，事情开始变得非常复杂。
Act Two, Blue Sky Dream.
第二幕，蓝天梦。
David Beers explains the gorgeous, modern vision that drew his parents and tens of thousands of other young families to California in the '50s and '60s to work in aerospace, and what happened when they arrived.
David Beers explains the gorgeous, modern vision that drew his parents and tens of thousands of other young families to California in the '50s and '60s to work in aerospace, and what happened when they arrived.
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
Act One.
第一幕。
In 1976, Meema Spadola's parents decided to move from the Upper West Side of Manhattan, where her father was a math teacher, out of the city to build a house in Maine.
1976 年，米玛·斯帕多拉 (Meema Spadola) 的父母决定从曼哈顿上西区（她父亲是数学老师）搬到缅因州建房子。
It turned out to be a pivotal and redefining change in all of their lives.
事实证明，这是他们一生中一个关键的、重新定义的变化。
Meema prepared this story about her family's move.
米玛准备了这个关于她家人搬家的故事。
It's partly the story of her parents' dreams and partly a story of her own.
这部分是她父母梦想的故事，部分是她自己的故事。
I don't have to guess at my parents' dream for our family when they moved us from New York City to Maine.
当我父母把我们从纽约搬到缅因州时，我不必猜测他们对我们家庭的梦想。
They wrote it all down in a book.
他们把这一切都写在一本书里。
My mother actually wrote an entire children's story, 83 pages long.
我妈妈实际上写了一个完整的儿童故事，长达 83 页。
My dad did the illustrations, and I picked the title, Meema's Adventures.
我爸爸画了插图，我选择了标题“米玛的冒险”。
I was six.
我当时六岁。
"Chapter One of Meema's Adventures, At Home.
“米玛的冒险第一章，在家。
Meema lived in New York City.
米玛住在纽约市。
Her apartment was on the 13th floor of a great, tall building on the windiest corner in all of the city.
她的公寓位于一栋宏伟高大建筑的 13 层，位于全市风最大的角落。
In the spring--"
春天的时候——”
When she wrote this the winter before we left, my mom was getting her master's degree in education.
当我们离开前的冬天，她写下这篇文章时，我妈妈正在获得教育学硕士学位。
She thought that our move raised some interesting questions about early childhood development.
她认为我们的举动引发了一些关于儿童早期发展的有趣问题。
Like, how do you help children deal with the consequences of their parents' decisions?
例如，您如何帮助孩子应对父母决定的后果？
Mom writes in the introduction, "In thinking how best to prepare my children and, indeed, my husband and myself, I came upon the idea of creating a story that we might, when the move comes, actually reenact."
妈妈在引言中写道：“在思考如何最好地让我的孩子们、我的丈夫和我自己做好准备时，我想到了创作一个故事的想法，当搬家到来时，我们可以真正重演这个故事。”
OK, "Chapter Four, Coming to the Mountain.
好，“第四章，上山。
The day the green pickup truck finished its long drive was sunny, cool, and breezy.
绿色皮卡车完成长途行驶的那天，阳光明媚，凉爽，微风徐徐。
The sun was setting rapidly behind the pond and over the mountains.
太阳正在池塘后面和山上迅速落下。
Mommy and daddy hoped to arrive just at this time and no later, so they could unload the truck and settle themselves nicely before dark.
妈妈和爸爸希望这个时候能赶到，不要迟到，这样他们就可以在天黑之前把卡车卸下来，安顿好。
Of course, there was no house here yet."
当然，这里还没有房子。”
It was raining when we arrived.
我们到达时正在下雨。
The air was thick with mosquitoes.
空气中充满了蚊子。
The grass was about three feet high and soaking wet.
草大约三英尺高，湿透了。
And the truck got stuck as soon as we pulled off the road.
我们一离开公路，卡车就被卡住了。
That's my dad with the real beginning to our adventure in Maine.
这是我的父亲，我们在缅因州的冒险才真正开始。
It was really his dream that got this started.
这确实是他的梦想开始的。
For seven years, he'd been working as an administrator and teacher at a private school in New York.
七年来，他一直在纽约一所私立学校担任行政人员和教师。
He didn't want to do that anymore.
他不想再这样做了。
He was living the wrong life.
他过着错误的生活。
He envisioned a homestead in the country with farm animals, gardens, maybe a windmill.
他设想在乡下建一个家园，里面有农场动物、花园，也许还有风车。
Perfectly self-sustaining and efficient.
完美的自我维持和高效。
I had this sense that I wanted to do something in my life that I had more control over.
我有一种感觉，我想做一些我能更好控制的生活。
I was feeling like I wanted to work on something that felt more like it was mine.
我感觉我想要做一些感觉更像是我的事情。
And I suppose I really wanted to build something also, the hands-on experience of building.
我想我也真的很想建造一些东西，即建造的实践经验。
Well, dad said we could build a house.
嗯，爸爸说我们可以盖一座房子。
So, of course, again, coming from apartment living, build a house, I just thought that meant like a-- the wildest thing I could think of was kind of like a suburban tract house, where you come in with a key and the toilets are there, the water's set up, the plumbing, the lights, heat, walls.
So, of course, again, coming from apartment living, build a house, I just thought that meant like a-- the wildest thing I could think of was kind of like a suburban tract house, where you come in with a key and the toilets are there, the water's set up, the plumbing, the lights, heat, walls.
You never imagined-- Meema's Mother It never occurred to me.
你从未想象过——米玛的母亲 我从未想到过。
It didn't occur to me.
我没想到。
And I don't think it occurred to dad to mention to me, "Well, that means we have to dig a well.
我不认为爸爸会向我提到：“嗯，这意味着我们必须挖一口井。
We have to deal with electricity." It didn't occur to me.
我们必须处理电力问题。”我没想到。
Her dream of our life in Maine was this.
她对我们在缅因州生活的梦想就是这样。
She'd bake bread, put up preserves, raise the kids.
她会烤面包、制作蜜饯、抚养孩子。
My mom was a nice Jewish girl from the Bronx.
我妈妈是一位来自布朗克斯的漂亮犹太女孩。
To her, it seemed like a great idea, and it didn't seem far-fetched.
对她来说，这似乎是一个好主意，而且并不牵强。
Dad was a country boy.
爸爸是个乡下孩子。
His father had built their house.
他们的房子是他父亲建造的。
He'd grown up with pigs and chickens in rural Rhode Island.
他在罗德岛州的乡村与猪和鸡一起长大。
But let's make this clearer.
但让我们把这一点说得更清楚。
Here was his plan.
这是他的计划。
We'd live in a tent while he built a house from scratch, completely by himself, on a raw piece of land on a mountain in the middle of Maine in one summer.
我们住在一个帐篷里，而他则在一个夏天，在缅因州中部一座山上的一块原始土地上，完全自己从零开始建造了一栋房子。
So that was the plan.
这就是计划。
And it didn't seem crazy at all.
而且这看起来一点也不疯狂。
We were very clear that it was an adventure and that some people envied us.
我们很清楚，这是一次冒险，有些人羡慕我们。
We actually thought everybody envied us.
我们实际上以为每个人都羡慕我们。
Did we ever think anybody thought we were nutty?
我们有没有想过有人认为我们疯了？
No, we never did.
不，我们从来没有这样做过。
But we thought people envied us.
但我们认为人们嫉妒我们。
This whole thing was very naive.
整件事非常天真。
Just no concept of how our lives would change at all.
只是根本不知道我们的生活会如何改变。
Our lives didn't just change.
我们的生活不仅改变了。
For me, it's the beginning of everything, of who I am, of who my family is today.
对我来说，这是一切的开始，是我是谁、我今天的家人的开始。
Four years into the project, the house wasn't finished, and my parents were separated.
项目进行了四年，房子还没有完工，我的父母就分居了。
My mother moved out.
我妈妈搬出去了。
My younger brother, Emilio, and I stayed with the house, with dad.
我和弟弟埃米利奥和爸爸一起住在房子里。
21 years later, my mother, brother, and I live in cities, as far from rural living as you can get.
21 年后，我的母亲、兄弟和我生活在城市，远离农村生活。
My father is remarried and is the last one of us living in the house.
我父亲再婚了，他是我们家里最后一个人。
It still isn't finished.
它还没有完成。
OK, well, first of all, who are these people?
好吧，首先，这些人是谁？
I'm looking at dad with a moustache and Emilio as, I guess, a three-year-old or a four-year-old and it's-- is that me?
我看着留着小胡子的爸爸和埃米利奥，我想，是一个三岁或四岁的孩子，那是我吗？
That's you.
那就是你。
That's you.
那就是你。
Meema's Mother Wow.
米玛的妈妈哇。
Wow.
哇。
I'm sorry to keep saying wow, but this-- it's like who are these people?
我很抱歉一直说哇，但这——就像这些人是谁？
I look through photos with my mom of our first summer in Maine.
我和妈妈一起翻看我们在缅因州第一个夏天的照片。
We seemed so optimistic and playful in these pictures, our family before the fall.
在这些照片中，我们一家人在秋天之前显得如此乐观和顽皮。
Mom and dad are young, good looking, working on the building site together.
爸爸妈妈年轻又好看，一起在建筑工地上干活。
Emilio and I eat breakfast outside the tent and help hammer nails.
埃米利奥和我在帐篷外吃早餐，并帮忙钉钉子。
There's one of us posing proudly in front of our new outhouse.
我们中的一个人在我们的新户外厕所前自豪地摆姿势。
I remember one time, this great time, when I was working on cutting the swath through the brush to put the road in, and it was raining.
我记得有一次，那是一个伟大的时刻，当时我正忙着在灌木丛中割草条以铺设道路，当时正在下雨。
It had been raining and raining for days.
雨已经下了好几天了。
And things had gotten pretty muddy.
事情变得非常混乱。
And you kids were completely naked, and you were sliding around in the mud and covered with mud.
你们这些孩子赤身裸体，在泥里滑来滑去，浑身都是泥。
And I had wanted somebody to come up to look at the possibility of doing a foundation for us.
我本来希望有人来看看是否有可能为我们建立一个基金会。
And he happened to arrive just as you kids came sliding down through the mud.
当你们这些孩子从泥浆里滑下来的时候，他恰好到达了。
He'd driven as far as he could up in his truck and got out to walk.
他开着卡车尽可能地开到最远的地方，然后下车步行。
And so he's confronted first with wet, muddy little kids screaming and laughing.
所以他首先面对的是湿漉漉的、泥泞的小孩子，他们尖叫着、笑着。
And I went running past him down the path.
我沿着小路跑过他。
And naked.
并且裸体。
Meema's Dad Yeah.
米玛的爸爸 是的。
And I came out wearing shorts and no shirt, holding my machete, and covered with little bits of leaves.
我出来时穿着短裤，没穿衬衫，手里拿着砍刀，身上沾满了树叶。
Because when I'd be chopping things up with the machete, leaves would be flying all over the place.
因为当我用砍刀砍东西时，树叶会飞得到处都是。
And I was wet, so they were stuck to me all over my body and my face.
我浑身湿透，所以它们粘在我的全身和脸上。
I had little pieces of leaves all over me.
我全身都是小叶子。
He looked a little startled.
他看起来有点吃惊。
I love this image of-- I couldn't have been happier.
我喜欢这张照片——我高兴极了。
If dad's dream was to have a project of his own, I had my own six-year-old dream, Little House on the Prairie.
如果说爸爸的梦想是拥有一个属于自己的项目，那么我也有自己六岁时的梦想——草原小屋。
And I'm not talking about that horrible TV series.
我不是在谈论那部可怕的电视剧。
I mean the books that Laura Ingalls Wilder wrote about her family's experience of moving West, building a home, and surviving blizzards, droughts, marauding wolves, and illnesses.
我指的是劳拉·英格斯·怀尔德（Laura Ingalls Wilder）写的书，讲述了她的家人向西迁移、建造家园以及在暴风雪、干旱、狼群掠夺和疾病中生存的经历。
In New York, I'd been obsessed with the Little House books and would act out scenes from them with friends.
在纽约时，我一直沉迷于《小房子》这本书，并会和朋友们一起表演其中的场景。
In Maine, I got to play Laura every day.
在缅因州，我每天都要和劳拉玩耍。
I saw everything through the filter of the Little House books.
我透过《小房子》书籍的过滤器看到了一切。
I'd pick blueberries up on the mountain, and mom would make a batch of pancakes over the camp stove.
我会在山上摘蓝莓，妈妈会在野营炉子上做一批煎饼。
Dad would cut two by fours for the house, and I'd stand by and hand him nails.
爸爸会为房子剪两块四块，我则站在旁边递给他钉子。
I felt like I had arrived.
我感觉我已经到了。
OK, so in my mythology of our summer, the summer of '76, it was like you were Pa, Laura's Pa, and I was Laura.
好吧，在我关于我们夏天的神话中，76 年的夏天，就像你是爸爸，劳拉的爸爸，而我是劳拉。
And it was like you were being this pioneer man.
就好像你是这个先驱者。
You were a big hero, and I was the little helper.
你是大英雄，我是小帮手。
That's what I felt like.
这就是我的感觉。
Well, that's not that far from the truth.
嗯，这与事实相差不远。
I think a lot of people thought of me as a big hero for doing this.
我想很多人都认为我是这样做的大英雄。
Our friends in New York City thought it was an extraordinary adventure.
我们在纽约的朋友认为这是一次非凡的冒险。
And I was probably the only one who didn't think I was a hero.
我可能是唯一一个不认为自己是英雄的人。
I was filled with anxiety that I wasn't telling anybody about because I realized that I had undertaken a pretty near impossible task.
我充满了焦虑，但我没有告诉任何人，因为我意识到我承担了一项几乎不可能完成的任务。
When I was writing Meema's Adventures, it was before we did it.
当我写《米玛历险记》时，是在我们开始写作之前。
So the time frame is totally wacky and unrealistic.
所以这个时间框架是完全古怪和不切实际的。
"Chapter Six, Moving In.
“第六章，搬进来。
Meema opened her eyes.
米玛睁开了眼睛。
Outside the tent, birds were singing their cheery morning wake-up songs, while inside the tent, Meema lay snuggled in her sleeping bag.
帐篷外，鸟儿在唱着欢快的早晨叫醒歌，而帐篷内，米玛依偎在睡袋里。
She was thinking about the day ahead.
她正在思考接下来的日子。
Today, they would finally move into the new house.
今天，他们终于要搬进新房子了。
The morning was cool and sunny with summer in its last days in Maine.
缅因州夏季的最后几天，早晨凉爽而阳光明媚。
Soon the tent would--"
很快，帐篷就会——”
In fact, when summer was in its last days, we had only a hole in the ground.
事实上，当夏天结束时，我们的地上只有一个洞。
There was no floor, no walls, no roof, no house.
没有地板，没有墙壁，没有屋顶，没有房子。
When I look back now, I think the moment the ominous music starts is here.
现在回想起来，不祥的音乐开始的时刻就在这里。
Do you remember-- not to bring up sad stuff.
你记得吗——不要提起悲伤的事情。
But do you remember Jamie, the puppy?
但你还记得小狗杰米吗？
Yeah, you mean the one I ran over.
是的，你说的是我撞过去的那个。
He was sleeping under the truck.
他睡在卡车下面。
I started it up, and he didn't wake up, and I didn't know he was there.
我启动了它，他没有醒来，我也不知道他在那里。
I felt pretty bad about it.
我对此感到非常难过。
It just seemed like this was like the first tragedy of the summer or something.
看起来这就像夏天的第一场悲剧之类的。
It was like something that seemed so nice had gone very wrong.
就好像一些看似美好的事情却出了大问题。
This is from Chapter Seven, At Home Again.
这是第七章《再次在家》中的内容。
"Winter evenings in the new house were cozy and warm.
“新房子里的冬夜舒适而温暖。
Mommy and daddy had finished building the stone fireplace, so now, after dinner every night, they all settled in the living room.
妈妈和爸爸已经把石头壁炉建好了，所以现在，每天晚上吃完晚饭后，他们都会在客厅里安顿下来。
The warmth and color of its fire cheered and relaxed everyone.
火焰的温暖和色彩让每个人都欢呼雀跃并放松下来。
The bright new wood--"
明亮的新木头——”
In reality, when the first snow came on October 3, we were still living in the tent.
事实上，10月3日第一场雪来的时候，我们还住在帐篷里。
And believe me, there was nothing cozy about it.
相信我，这并没有什么舒服的地方。
The only thing we could do was set up camp in the unfinished house.
我们唯一能做的就是在未完工的房子里扎营。
There were no windows.
没有窗户。
There were window openings cut, but no windows.
窗户被切开，但没有窗户。
And the openings were covered with plastic.
开口处用塑料覆盖。
Oh, that's right.
哦，是这样。
That's right.
这是正确的。
On the south side.
在南边。
Not a very secure house.
不是一个非常安全的房子。
And impossible to heat.
而且不可能加热。
It was just a shell, really.
真的，那只是一个外壳。
And it already had started to snow, and I got kind of concerned because we were going to sleep immediately after dinner, and all us were wearing hats, and gloves, and coats, and scarves.
天已经开始下雪了，我有点担心，因为晚饭后我们就要睡觉了，我们都戴着帽子、手套、外套和围巾。
I felt like we were hibernating.
我感觉我们好像在冬眠。
Mom said something about feeling like she would come home from work, and we would all eat, and then we were all dressed in our coats, and our hats, and our mittens.
妈妈说了一些关于感觉她会下班回家，我们都会吃饭，然后我们都穿上外套，戴上帽子和手套。
And we would just get into bed, and it was like we were hibernating.
我们就上床睡觉，就像在冬眠一样。
Oh, that's interesting.
哦，这很有趣。
I don't remember.
我不记得了。
I honestly don't remember.
老实说我不记得了。
I would drive home from work through Camden and on the way home to Lincolnville.
下班后我会开车穿过卡姆登回家，然后再回到林肯维尔。
And I would see the lights.
我会看到灯光。
4 o'clock, 4:30 in the afternoon, lights would start coming on in the houses.
下午4点、4点30分，房子里的灯开始亮起来。
It sort of felt like I was out of Dickens or something.
感觉就像我脱离了狄更斯之类的。
Oh, a house.
哦，一栋房子。
A real home.
一个真正的家。
And it started getting cold, and we decided-- well, really, mom pushed this wisely-- that we should not go any further without getting another place for the winter.
天开始变冷，我们决定——嗯，真的，妈妈明智地推动了这一点——如果没有找到另一个过冬的地方，我们就不应该再走得更远。
I just felt like it's really important, I think, that we find a place where we can have a cabin and really have warmth and light.
我只是觉得，我认为，我们找到一个可以拥有小屋、真正拥有温暖和光线的地方，这一点非常重要。
It didn't need to be necessarily electric stuff, but a closed-up house.
它不一定是电动的，而是封闭的房子。
Well, at that point, it kind of felt like it was being a little bit of a lot to ask.
嗯，那时，感觉好像问得有点多了。
It was impossible to stay.
留下来是不可能的。
We moved out of the house to a small summer cabin a few miles away.
我们搬出了房子，搬到了几英里外的一个避暑小木屋。
The pipes there were frozen, so there was no running water.
那里的水管被冻住了，所以没有自来水。
A word now about where this adventure took place.
现在谈谈这次冒险发生的地点。
Searsmont, Maine.
缅因州西尔斯蒙特。
Population 500.
人口500。
You've never heard of it.
你从来没有听说过它。
You didn't go to camp there.
你没有去那里露营。
Don't think L.L.
别以为 L.L.
Bean in Kennebunkport.
肯纳邦克港的比恩。
Think Appalachia, hardscrabble, not quaint.
想想阿巴拉契亚，这里很艰苦，但并不古怪。
And my dad's plan in the middle of this was to do everything himself.
而我父亲的计划是他自己做所有的事情。
At one point, he spent a week at the bottom of a 30-foot hole with a pickax trying to dig a well.
有一次，他在一个 30 英尺深的洞底花了一周时间，用镐试图挖一口井。
We didn't have electricity or a phone then.
那时我们没有电，也没有电话。
Nothing came easy here.
这里没有什么是容易的。
Sometimes when people go after a dream like this, they make an innocent decision for innocent reasons that has profound consequences.
有时，当人们追求这样的梦想时，他们会出于无辜的原因做出无辜的决定，从而产生深远的后果。
I wanted a view.
我想要一个风景。
And I just thought, well, I just didn't understand what difference it would make.
我只是想，好吧，我只是不明白这会带来什么不同。
But I think everyone was a mite surprised that we built right up the farthest spot up on the hill, just really way up.
但我认为每个人都感到惊讶，因为我们就在山上最远的地方建了一个地方，真的很高。
And that's where dad fit right in.
这就是爸爸最适合的地方。
He indulged those fantasies.
他沉迷于这些幻想。
Because he's like, "Hey, great idea.
因为他就像，“嘿，好主意。
Sure, we can build up there."
当然，我们可以在那里建设。”
Let me explain because this might not seem like a big deal.
让我解释一下，因为这似乎没什么大不了的。
A view means back from the road, which in our case means back from the road, past the field, up through the brush and trees, on the side of the mountain.
风景意味着从路上回来，在我们的例子中，这意味着从路上回来，经过田野，穿过灌木丛和树木，在山的一侧。
Which means a really long driveway.
这意味着一条非常长的车道。
And when I say driveway, it doesn't exactly capture this.
当我说车道时，它并没有完全体现这一点。
There should be another word for what this was.
应该有另一个词来形容这是什么。
During the winter, when Emilio and I would get home from school, the sun would be setting, and we'd struggle up to the house through drifted snow.
冬天，当埃米利奥和我放学回家时，太阳已经落山了，我们要穿过飘雪艰难地回到家。
My parents couldn't get the cars up, so they'd walk up and down carry supplies and groceries on a sled.
我的父母无法把车开起来，所以他们只能用雪橇来回搬运物资和杂货。
Once it was totally iced over, and we could barely walk up and down.
一旦完全结冰，我们几乎无法上下行走。
For parts of the driveway, we literally had to crawl on our hands and knees.
对于车道的某些部分，我们实际上不得不用手和膝盖爬行。
And I remember once-- and this seems straight out of some Arctic expedition.
我记得有一次——这似乎是某次北极探险的直接结果。
Late at night, Emilio and I were so tired, we tried to lie in the snowbanks to rest.
深夜，埃米利奥和我太累了，我们试图躺在雪堆上休息。
My dad pulled on our arms and yelled at us to get up or we'd freeze to death.
我爸爸拉着我们的手臂，大声叫我们站起来，否则我们就会被冻死。
We all had to deal with that driveway, but it was the worst for my dad.
我们都必须应对那条车道，但这对我父亲来说是最糟糕的。
There was one particular day when it snowed, and I really feel like something came over dad.
有一天，下雪了，我真的感觉爸爸发生了什么事。
It was like this battle with nature and that he was going to win.
这就像一场与自然的战斗，他将获胜。
And he didn't.
但他没有。
He started at the top.
他从顶层开始。
We must have been snowed in at the top.
我们一定是在山顶被雪困住了。
He started to shovel all the way down, and it took him hours, and hours, and hours.
他开始一路铲下去，花了几个小时、几个小时、几个小时。
And, of course, it was still snowing, and it was very difficult to reason with him of your tracks are being totally covered, and this is kind of a blizzard, and it's windy.
当然，天还在下雪，很难跟他解释你的足迹被完全覆盖了，这是一场暴风雪，而且风很大。
I don't think he ever quite, quite got to the bottom.
我认为他还没有完全彻底了解真相。
He was just exhausted and wiped out.
他只是筋疲力尽，筋疲力尽。
And it was dark.
天很黑。
And then when he trudged back up the hill, it was all blown over.
当他艰难地走回山上时，一切都被风吹倒了。
It was a whole day's work that really, really did nothing.
一整天的工作，真的什么也没做。
It's amazing that with all the construction, and machinery, and my dad's general frenzy that he didn't kill himself.
令人惊奇的是，尽管有这么多的建筑、机械，还有我父亲的疯狂，他却没有自杀。
There was a series of accidents.
发生了一系列事故。
He cut his nose on barbed wire, hammered his nose, fell off staging two times, broke several ribs, collapsed a lung, nearly ruptured his spleen.
他的鼻子被铁丝网割伤，用锤子敲打鼻子，两次从舞台上摔下来，折断几根肋骨，肺部塌陷，脾脏几乎破裂。
And then there was the worst of all.
然后是最糟糕的事情。
We had been out for the day, and we came back, and it was towards evening.
我们出去了一天，回来时已是傍晚时分。
It was dusk.
当时已是黄昏。
And I decided that I should cut up some wood, so that the whole day shouldn't be just used up on frivolous stuff, that I should do some work.
我决定我应该砍一些木头，这样一整天就不会只花在无聊的事情上，我应该做一些工作。
Because I was trying to keep myself very disciplined about getting a certain amount of work done.
因为我试图让自己保持严格的纪律，完成一定数量的工作。
And I hadn't cut up enough wood.
而且我没有砍足够的木头。
So I said I would just work on that a little bit.
所以我说我会在这方面做一点工作。
And I was trying to do it very fast because it was getting dark and I'd set myself a certain amount to do.
我试图做得很快，因为天已经黑了，我给自己设定了一定的工作量。
And I was just standing in the pile of wood, cutting, which is a bad way to do it.
我只是站在木头堆里砍伐，这是一个糟糕的方法。
And kicking aside the cut end pieces as they dropped off.
当切掉的末端碎片掉落时，将它们踢到一边。
And my foot rolled on one of them, and I fell forward into the pile with the chainsaw out in front of me.
我的脚踩到了其中一个，我向前摔进了一堆东西，电锯就在我面前。
The tip hit the pile and kicked back.
尖端撞到堆上并向后踢。
And as I fell forward, it turned around, and the blade faced me.
当我向前倒下时，它转过身来，刀刃面向我。
And it caught me under the chin.
它抓住了我的下巴。
Oh, God.
哦，上帝。
Meema's Dad Missing cutting my throat open by just inches.
米玛的爸爸失踪了，把我的喉咙割开了几英寸。
It would have been terr-- I mean, your life would have been completely different.
那就太棒了——我的意思是，你的生活将会完全不同。
I thought I'd cut my throat open.
我以为我会割断我的喉咙。
I remember bits and pieces, and I remember the sort of ragged, pink flesh that hung under his chin.
我记得一些零碎的事情，我记得他下巴下挂着的那种破烂的、粉红色的肉。
That's my brother, Emilio.
那是我的兄弟，埃米利奥。
He's 25 now.
他现在25岁了。
He was about 5 at the time.
当时他大约5岁。
And I remember mom packing towels against his neck and wringing out one of the towels before driving to the hospital.
我记得妈妈在开车去医院之前，把毛巾包在他的脖子上，并拧干其中一条毛巾。
Wringing out the blood?
要把血拧出来吗？
Emilio Wringing out the blood, right.
埃米利奥 拧干血，对吧。
And I don't remember any specifics after that.
此后我不记得任何细节了。
You don't remember him coming in and saying-- I remember him coming in the door with this hand over his neck and blood just gushing out.
你不记得他进门时说——我记得他进门的时候一只手捂着脖子，鲜血喷涌而出。
And he said, "Maddie, I cut myself."
他说：“麦迪，我割伤了自己。”
Oh God.
天啊。
Meema Spadola It's just like-- that voice.
Meema Spadola It's just like-- that voice.
Those words.
那些话。
Oh, God.
哦，上帝。
It was so scary.
太可怕了。
I just thought-- what else could you think?
我只是想——你还能想到什么？
Dad's going to die.
爸爸快要死了。
Right.
正确的。
Meema Spadola If my dad had his dream of a rural homestead, and my mom had her dream of being Earth Mother, and I had my Little House on the Prairie fantasy, what's interesting is that Emilio had no dream about our move to Maine.
米玛·斯帕多拉（Meema Spadola） 如果我爸爸有一个乡村宅基地的梦想，我妈妈有她成为地球母亲的梦想，而我有我在草原上的小屋的幻想，那么有趣的是埃米利奥没有梦想我们搬到缅因州。
He was just four.
他才四岁。
And as best as any of us can figure, he was the only one of us who didn't see the whole experience through a romantic haze.
正如我们所有人所能想象的那样，他是我们中唯一一个没有透过浪漫的迷雾来看待整个经历的人。
By August that first summer, he was asking dad, "When are we going to go home?" Meaning home to our apartment in New York.
第一个夏天的八月，他问爸爸：“我们什么时候回家？”意思是我们在纽约的公寓的家。
And Dad had to tell him, "We are home."
爸爸不得不告诉他：“我们到家了。”
So I had an interesting discussion with dad about bravery, about bravery versus insanity.
所以我和爸爸就勇敢、勇敢与疯狂进行了一次有趣的讨论。
And was he crazy, or was he brave?
And was he crazy, or was he brave?
Was he a hero, or was he insane?
Was he a hero, or was he insane?
Where do you come down on that?
Where do you come down on that?
It's very interesting because the framing of the question is very telling of your vision of him that I don't quite get for myself.
这很有趣，因为这个问题的框架非常能说明你对他的看法，但我自己不太明白。
I get it, but I hesitate to say that it's the little girl vision of the father.
我明白了，但我犹豫是否要说这是父亲的小女孩愿景。
But it definitely is.
但确实如此。
I just don't remember him as being crazy or insane.
我只是不记得他是个疯子或疯子。
Or what was the other choice, heroic?
或者另一个选择是什么，英雄？
I remember spending a lot of time with him and being part of his everyday building of the house.
我记得我花了很多时间和他在一起，并成为他日常建筑的一部分。
Particularly, I remember lunches down at Sprowl Lumber and just a lot of time to just be with him.
特别是，我记得在 Sprowl Lumber 吃午餐，还有很多时间和他在一起。
And just riding around in the green truck with him and sort of being his sidekick.
和他一起开着绿色卡车到处转，算是他的助手。
And I never thought of him as heroic.
And I never thought of him as heroic.
Talking to Emilio, I was surprised.
Talking to Emilio, I was surprised.
I hadn't really thought about this, but it's no accident that my mom called the book, Meema's Adventures.
我并没有真正考虑过这一点，但我妈妈将这本书称为“米玛的历险记”并非偶然。
This was my dream, not Emilio's.
This was my dream, not Emilio's.
So I read Meema's Adventures with mom.
所以我和妈妈一起读了《米玛历险记》。
Do you want to hear a little bit from it?
你想听听一点吗？
Please, yeah.
拜托，是的。
Meema Spadola OK.
米玛·斯帕多拉 好的。
This is in the section when mom and dad are telling us that we're going to be leaving New York.
这是爸爸妈妈告诉我们我们要离开纽约的部分。
And we are, actually.
事实上，我们确实是这样。
We are.
我们是。
Emilio Interesting.
埃米利奥 有趣。
We are overjoyed.
我们欣喜若狂。
Emilio Revisionist history.
埃米利奥修正主义历史。
"'Oh, yay.
“‘哦，是的。
Oh, this is so much fun.'" And then, "'Will we ever come back to the city to live?' Meema asked quietly turning to daddy.
哦，这太有趣了。’”然后，“‘我们会回到城市生活吗？’米玛转向爸爸轻声问道。
'To be honest, sweetheart.
'To be honest, sweetheart.
I don't know.
我不知道。
The city is a good place to live in and grow, and so is the country.
城市是一个适宜居住和成长的地方，乡村也是如此。
We've been in the city for a long time, and life has been very happy.'
我们在城市里呆了很长时间，生活很幸福。”
'It's cold in Maine,' said Emilio.
'It's cold in Maine,' said Emilio.
'I don't want to be cold.'
'I don't want to be cold.'
'Yes, the winters in Maine are cold,' said daddy.
“是的，缅因州的冬天很冷，”爸爸说。
'But we'll have a good, hot wood stove for indoors and layers and layers of clothing for outdoors.
“但是我们会在室内准备一个优质的热柴火炉，在室外准备一层又一层的衣服。”
You won't be cold, Emilio.
You won't be cold, Emilio.
You'll be snug as a bug.'
You'll be snug as a bug.'
'I don't mind the winter.
'I don't mind the winter.
I really want to have some animals,' said Meema.
我真的很想要一些动物，”米玛说。
'And a puppy?' asked Emilio.
“还有一只小狗？”埃米利奥问。
'I think we surely could,' said mommy."
'I think we surely could,' said mommy."
And daddy will run over it with the truck.
And daddy will run over it with the truck.
For Emilio and me, the move to Maine was the central fact of our childhood, one of the central forces shaping who we are.
对于埃米利奥和我来说，搬到缅因州是我们童年的核心事实，是塑造我们的核心力量之一。
As we've grown up, we've found we both have our father's mania when it comes to taking on big projects.
随着我们的成长，我们发现我们都有父亲那样的热衷于承担大型项目。
We've both worked ourselves, literally, to the point of injury.
毫不夸张地说，我们都曾工作到受伤的地步。
As a teenager, Emilio tried to embrace rural life.
青少年时期，埃米利奥试图拥抱乡村生活。
He threw himself into rock climbing, got wilderness first aid certification, led hiking trips.
他全身心投入攀岩，获得了荒野急救认证，并带领徒步旅行。
He was as obsessive about rock climbing as my dad was about building the house.
他对攀岩的痴迷就像我父亲对建造房子的痴迷一样。
Here's another thing that I think about.
这是我想到的另一件事。
Are we city kids?
我们是城里孩子吗？
Are we country kids?
我们是乡下孩子吗？
Oh, well, I definitely decided that I was a city kid at the height of my attempt to become a wilderness trip leader.
哦，好吧，在我试图成为荒野旅行领队的鼎盛时期，我确实决定自己是一个城市孩子。
And I was cultivating a very natural, adventurous personality at Swarthmore, and leading the rock climbing club, and going on lots of hikes.
我在斯沃斯莫尔培养了一种非常自然、富有冒险精神的性格，领导攀岩俱乐部，并进行了很多徒步旅行。
I skipped my final exam study period when I was 19, and I went to go for a weeklong hike somewhere in the Shenandoahs, I think.
我 19 岁时跳过了期末考试学习期，我想我去谢南多厄山脉的某个地方进行了为期一周的徒步旅行。
And about three days into it, I realized that against every instinct that I had and every wish that I had for myself to be a rugged outdoorsman that I was really a city kid.
大约三天后，我意识到，与我所有的本能和我想成为一名粗犷的户外运动者的每一个愿望相反，我实际上是一个城市孩子。
And it came out of nowhere.
它不知从何而来。
And I remember feeling upset about it on par with the realization that I was possibly gay at 16.
我记得我对此感到不安，就像 16 岁时意识到自己可能是同性恋一样。
They were very similar, that moment at which your self-image and your self-knowledge have nothing to do with each other, in fact, are diametrically opposed.
很相似，那个时候你的自我形象和你的自我认识是无关的，实际上是截然对立的。
So I'm a city kid.
所以我是一个城里孩子。
Emilio's moving back to New York to get his PhD in anthropology, just six blocks from where we lived on the Upper West Side, 460 miles away from our house in Maine.
埃米利奥要搬回纽约攻读人类学博士学位，这里距离我们上西区的住处仅六个街区，距离我们缅因州的家 460 英里。
It feels like a person rather than a thing.
感觉像是一个人而不是一个东西。
It feels like a member of the family to me.
It feels like a member of the family to me.
I feel like I would be really heartbroken if it were sold.
我觉得如果卖了我真的会心碎。
I'd be really heartbroken.
我真的会心碎。
I don't think there's any danger of anyone ever buying that house.
我认为任何人买那栋房子都不会有任何危险。
Stop.
停止。
Or worse, what if someone bought the land and tore down the house?
或者更糟糕的是，如果有人买了土地并拆掉了房子怎么办？
Right, exactly.
对，完全正确。
Meema Spadola I feel like I would fling myself upon the machinery.
米玛·斯帕多拉（Meema Spadola） 我觉得我会把自己扔到机器上。
Do not, do not take the house.
不，不拿房子。
Whereas I would feel in some way that I could finally get on with my life.
而我会在某种程度上感觉到我终于可以继续我的生活了。
There's the difference.
这是有区别的。
Meema Spadola's story about her family's move to Maine continues in a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.
当我们的节目继续时，国际公共广播电台将继续讲述米玛·斯帕多拉 (Meema Spadola) 一家人搬到缅因州的故事。
It's This American Life , I'm Ira Glass.
这就是美国生活，我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we chose a theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
Each week on our program, of course, we chose a theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
Today's show, Dream House.
今天的节目是《梦想屋》。
Parents who try to build a brighter future for their families, and what happens to them when they try.
努力为家庭创造更光明未来的父母，以及当他们尝试时会发生什么。
We continue with Meema Spadola's story about her parents' move to Maine, and what it did to their family.
我们继续讲述米玛·斯帕多拉 (Meema Spadola) 的故事，讲述她的父母搬到缅因州，以及这对他们的家庭造成的影响。
Just pulled in the driveway here.
刚刚把车停在车道上。
Starting up the hill.
开始上山。
To do this radio story, I went home to Maine for the first time in two years.
为了做这个广播故事，我两年来第一次回到缅因州的家。
Oh my god, and there's the house.
天哪，房子就在那里。
And dad's home.
还有爸爸的家。
And just a honk to let him know I'm here.
只需按喇叭让他知道我在这里。
He's playing piano inside.
他正在里面弹钢琴。
I can hear him out here.
我在这里能听到他的声音。
Dad's totally oblivious.
爸爸完全没有注意到。
He's playing piano and doesn't even hear me even though I honked.
他正在弹钢琴，即使我按喇叭，他也没有听到我的声音。
I'm going to sneak in.
我要偷偷溜进去。
And [UNINTELLIGIBLE] the back.
还有[无法辨认]的背面。
Hey, dad.
嘿，爸爸。
You were totally oblivious playing the piano.
你完全没有注意到弹钢琴。
How did you sneak up on me?
你怎么偷袭我的？
Meema Spadola I honked.
米玛·斯帕多拉 我按了喇叭。
I honked from outside.
我从外面按喇叭。
You didn't hear me?
你没听见我说话吗？
While I was home, my dad and I talked constantly about the house, the move, the summer of 1976.
当我在家的时候，我和爸爸不断地谈论房子、搬家、1976 年的夏天。
We'd never talked this much about that time.
那时我们从未谈论过这么多。
We walked the boundaries of the 63 acres of land and visited all the old sites, where we put the tent, the outhouse.
我们沿着 63 英亩土地的边界行走，参观了所有旧址，我们在那里搭帐篷、户外厕所。
Do you see the-- of course, you see the rope hanging from the tree.
你看到了吗——当然，你看到树上挂着的绳子。
That was our swing.
那是我们的挥杆。
That was your swing, yeah.
那是你的挥杆，是的。
That limb is dead now.
那条肢体现在已经死了。
You wouldn't want to try swinging on it.
你不会想尝试在上面摇摆的。
No. Hey, did you know about the thing that Emilio and I-- what Emilio and I had, the squirrel house?
No. Hey, did you know about the thing that Emilio and I-- what Emilio and I had, the squirrel house?
No, show me.
不，给我看看。
Meema Spadola It wasn't a real squirrel house.
Meema Spadola 这不是真正的松鼠屋。
This was a game that we played.
这是我们玩的游戏。
That while you were building your house, we were building our house.
当你建造你的房子时，我们也在建造我们的房子。
And we were the squirrel family, and it was right over here.
我们是松鼠一家，它就在这里。
Does it look familiar to you?
你看起来很熟悉吗？
Meema Spadola Sort of.
米玛·斯帕多拉 有点。
There's this big flat rock--
有一块又大又平的岩石——
I asked dad to give me a tour of the house as it stands today.
I asked dad to give me a tour of the house as it stands today.
The porch in front is half completed, the floor is unfinished, Sheetrock isn't up in most rooms, the bathroom isn't done yet.
前面的门廊已完成一半，地板尚未完成，大多数房间都没有铺石膏板，浴室也尚未完成。
And I guess I hadn't thought about this up until now, but it really embarrasses him.
And I guess I hadn't thought about this up until now, but it really embarrasses him.
These days my dad's an architect.
如今我父亲是一名建筑师。
He took pains to point out he's finished a lot of houses now, except this one.
他煞费苦心地指出，除了这栋之外，他现在已经完成了很多房子。
And the stairs just have plywood treads.
楼梯只有胶合板踏板。
They don't have the oak treads on that they're supposed to get.
They don't have the oak treads on that they're supposed to get.
And this little piece of wall here hasn't been sheetrocked yet.
And this little piece of wall here hasn't been sheetrocked yet.
But I did run the wiring in it, so now I can put the Sheetrock on it.
But I did run the wiring in it, so now I can put the Sheetrock on it.
I didn't have any walls on my bedroom until I was like 15.
直到我 15 岁之前，我的卧室里都没有墙壁。
That's OK.
没关系。
I survived.
我活了下来。
And I didn't have a door for a long time.
而且我已经很久没有进门了。
I have a door on my old room now.
我的旧房间现在有一扇门。
It doesn't have a doorknob.
它没有门把手。
So when you close it, it just sort of closes, and then you have to wedge your fingers in and open it up.
所以当你关闭它时，它只是关闭了，然后你必须将手指插入并打开它。
So this is really going to be on the radio, huh?
所以这真的会出现在广播中，是吧？
Sure.
当然。
Meema's Dad Thanks, Meema.
米玛的爸爸谢谢你，米玛。
I'm supposed to be an architect though.
但我应该是一名建筑师。
This is great advertisement for me.
这对我来说是一个很棒的广告。
Can't even finish his own house.
连自己的房子都建不完。
While I was home doing these interviews, there were a lot of times that my dad got uncomfortable.
While I was home doing these interviews, there were a lot of times that my dad got uncomfortable.
And I'm embarrassed to say that I didn't understand why, so I kept pushing him.
And I'm embarrassed to say that I didn't understand why, so I kept pushing him.
And finally, after days of this, he told me something I never understood before.
最后，过了几天，他告诉了我一些我以前从未理解过的事情。
We shared this experience, the move to Maine, but we didn't see it the same way at all.
We shared this experience, the move to Maine, but we didn't see it the same way at all.
Every time I talked about it as a heroic adventure, he'd just cringe.
每次我将其视为一次英雄冒险时，他都会感到畏缩。
For years, he saw the move as a grim series of failures.
For years, he saw the move as a grim series of failures.
He dropped out of college, and this was his biggest attempt to redeem himself, to make something of his own.
他从大学退学，这是他救赎自己、开创自己事业的最大尝试。
And every snowstorm, broken-down car, every unfinished part of the house, every single crisis was a referendum on his character.
And every snowstorm, broken-down car, every unfinished part of the house, every single crisis was a referendum on his character.
No matter how desperately he struggled, things kept slipping out of his control.
无论他如何拼命挣扎，事情却总是脱离他的控制。
And even as I say this, I feel incredibly resistant to seeing it this way because it means that I have to reconstruct my entire heroic vision of my childhood.
即使我这么说，我仍然非常抗拒以这种方式看待它，因为这意味着我必须重建我童年的整个英雄愿景。
One of the long-term effects that I sort of joke about and it's also true, is that you've set up this ideal of what a man should do that most men couldn't really live up to.
我开玩笑说的长期影响之一是，你已经建立了一个男人应该做什么的理想，而大多数男人却无法真正实现。
And again, it's--
再说一遍，这是——
Including me.
包括我。
Meema Spadola Including you, yeah.
Meema Spadola 包括你，是的。
Turns out my dad would be more comfortable if I didn't see him as the hero of an adventure story.
Turns out my dad would be more comfortable if I didn't see him as the hero of an adventure story.
My agenda isn't to explode your myth, but you did ask me to give my version of it because you felt like you'd mythologized it.
我的议程不是要打破你的神话，但你确实要求我给出我的版本，因为你觉得你把它神话化了。
It's funny.
很有趣。
It's like people will ask me, well, what are your parents like?
就像人们会问我，你的父母是什么样的？
The fact is, you're not a big man.
事实是，你并不是一个大人物。
How tall are you, dad?
爸爸，你有多高？
5'7''.
5'7''。
Meema Spadola Right, you're not a big guy.
Meema Spadola 是的，你不是个大人物。
You're strong, you're muscular.
你很强壮，你肌肉发达。
But you're not this huge, macho guy.
但你并不是这个大男子主义的家伙。
You were a math teacher.
你是一名数学老师。
You played piano, but you were just the coolest dad ever.
你弹钢琴，但你是有史以来最酷的爸爸。
No, really.
不，真的。
You were.
你是。
You made a bicycle.
你做了一辆自行车。
You didn't make a bicycle for me, but remember that bike I got?
你没有为我制造自行车，但还记得我得到的那辆自行车吗？
The first bike?
第一辆自行车？
And you painted it red, and you wrote "Meema" on the side.
你把它涂成红色，并在侧面写上“Meema”。
You were just the coolest dad ever.
你是有史以来最酷的爸爸。
You built us loft beds in Manhattan, and there was a swing in our room and a bar to swing on.
你们在曼哈顿为我们建造了阁楼床，我们的房间里有一个秋千和一个可以荡秋千的吧台。
And then you moved us up to Maine.
然后你把我们搬到了缅因州。
It was like, how much cooler could you get than that?
It was like, how much cooler could you get than that?
That's nice to hear.
很高兴听到这个消息。
That's really nice to hear.
很高兴听到这个消息。
I didn't know that.
我不知道。
Oh, you wanted to know where the outhouse was?
哦，你想知道外屋在哪里吗？
Yes.
是的。
So we walked to see where the outhouse was.
于是我们步行去看看外屋在哪里。
But the structure was gone, and the hole was filled in, healed over like it never existed.
但结构消失了，洞被填满，愈合了，就像它从未存在过一样。
My dad told me he doesn't want to be judged on that one period in our lives when we moved to Maine.
我父亲告诉我，当我们搬到缅因州时，他不想因为我们生命中的那段时期而受到评判。
And I certainly don't want to say this was my life, building this house.
我当然不想说这就是我的生活，建造这座房子。
A life is many things.
一个人的一生有很多事情。
There's a lot to it.
其中有很多内容。
It's having children, and raising children, and the work I've done, and all kinds of things.
包括生孩子、抚养孩子、我所做的工作以及各种各样的事情。
My relationships, friends, my whole life.
我的人际关系、朋友、我的整个生活。
So we're breaking down the-- I guess in some ways maybe I need to diffuse the importance that this has had.
所以我们正在分解——我想在某些方面也许我需要传播这件事的重要性。
Do you know what I mean?
你知道我的意思吗？
Perhaps.
也许。
Meema Spadola Well, just because it happened at such an important time, and it was like, this was my childhood.
Meema Spadola 嗯，只是因为它发生在如此重要的时刻，就像，这就是我的童年。
I don't have many memories before a time when this was happening.
在这件事发生之前我没有太多的记忆。
This is what I'm from.
这就是我的出身。
This is what I come from.
这就是我的来历。
It's this house.
就是这个房子。
It was like this family member.
就像这个家庭成员一样。
Really, it was so present.
真的，它是如此的存在。
But that's you.
但那就是你。
And I don't know that you have to necessarily debunk a myth or anything like that to move on.
And I don't know that you have to necessarily debunk a myth or anything like that to move on.
But for me, what would it be like for me if I just stayed with this as if this is the essential thing about me and I didn't do anything else?
但对我来说，如果我只是坚持下去，就好像这是我最重要的事情，我不做任何其他事情，那对我来说会是什么样子？
What would that be like?
那会是什么样子？
And it's just not sufficient either.
但这还不够。
It's not enough for me.
这对我来说还不够。
And for me, we had a different experience of it.
对我来说，我们有不同的经历。
And now, for me, I live in it.
而现在，对我来说，我生活在其中。
It's just a common place.
这只是一个常见的地方。
It doesn't have any of this mythical aura about it.
它没有任何神秘的光环。
I don't think that's entirely true.
我认为这并不完全正确。
For years, he couldn't work on the house.
多年来，他无法在房子上工作。
He just stopped.
他刚刚停了下来。
Like if he stopped trying, he'd stop failing.
就像如果他停止尝试，他就不会失败。
But over the course of talking about this for weeks while I put together this story, something changed.
但在我整理这个故事的几个星期的讨论过程中，事情发生了变化。
It happened after he told me about feeling like he'd failed.
这件事发生在他告诉我他感觉自己失败了之后。
Somehow after that conversation, it felt like there wasn't anything more to say about that time.
Somehow after that conversation, it felt like there wasn't anything more to say about that time.
And for the first time in years, my dad started working on the house again.
多年来，我父亲第一次再次开始修房子。
He called me the other night.
那天晚上他给我打电话。
He says he's already finished the bathroom, put in a beautiful tile floor, replaced the ugly, old toilet.
他说他已经完成了浴室，铺上了漂亮的瓷砖地板，更换了又丑又旧的厕所。
Sheetrock is going up.
板岩正在上升。
Meema Spadola is a documentary filmmaker living in New York, an hour subway ride from where she was born.
米玛·斯帕多拉 (Meema Spadola) 是一位居住在纽约的纪录片制片人，距离她的出生地有一个小时的地铁车程。
Act Two, Blue Sky Dream.
第二幕，蓝天梦。
David Beers Ronald Reagan made my family's tract home into a dream home.
大卫·比尔斯·罗纳德·里根将我家的小房子变成了梦想之家。
Just about the time of his landslide reelection in 1984, Ronald Reagan knocked out the north and west facing walls of our house.
就在 1984 年罗纳德·里根以压倒性优势连任时，他拆除了我们房子朝北和朝西的墙壁。
He tore out the linoleum floor and the flocked ceiling of the family room.
他拆掉了家庭活动室的油毡地板和植绒天花板。
Ronald Reagan gave my mother a kitchen twice the area of the old one.
罗纳德·里根给了我母亲一间面积是原来厨房两倍的厨房。
He gave my father a shop of his own just off the garage.
他在车库旁边给我父亲开了一家自己的商店。
He got rid of--
他摆脱了——
That's David Beers reading from his memoir, Blue Sky Dream.
That's David Beers reading from his memoir, Blue Sky Dream.
Ronald Reagan built his family dream house by funding the strategic defense initiative, Star Wars.
罗纳德·里根通过资助战略防御计划“星球大战”建造了他的家庭梦想之家。
David Beers' father was an aerospace engineer.
大卫·比尔斯的父亲是一名航空航天工程师。
And back in 1957, after the Russian satellite Sputnik scared the nation into a new defense industry boom, Beers' family joined tens of thousands of others who went to work in aerospace in northern California.
早在 1957 年，俄罗斯人造卫星让整个国家陷入了新的国防工业繁荣之后，比尔斯的家人就加入了数以万计的其他人的行列，前往加州北部从事航空航天工作。
Beers' father worked at Lockheed on secret defense projects through the Cold War and the Vietnam War.
冷战和越南战争期间，比尔斯的父亲在洛克希德公司从事秘密国防项目。
Those these days the suburbs get criticized as a place of sheer materialism, Beers writes that it was not materialism that was attractive to his family when they moved out to the California suburbs.
如今，郊区被批评为纯粹的物质主义之地，比尔斯写道，当他们搬到加州郊区时，吸引他的家人的并不是物质主义。
It was the emptiness of the place.
那地方空无一人。
It was the fact that you could create new, modern lives out there, hopeful lives, crafting new traditions.
事实上，你可以在那里创造新的、现代的生活，充满希望的生活，创造新的传统。
He writes that, at one point, his mother actually decided that the family was Irish even though, really, they were only one-fourth Irish.
他写道，有一次，他的母亲实际上认为这个家庭是爱尔兰人，尽管实际上他们只有四分之一的爱尔兰人。
But let's not let those facts get in the way.
但我们不要让这些事实成为障碍。
My mother decided that a fun thing to be was an Irish Catholic, and so she was determined to invent this Irishness for us in the middle of Mediterranean California.
My mother decided that a fun thing to be was an Irish Catholic, and so she was determined to invent this Irishness for us in the middle of Mediterranean California.
And so there were leprechauns living in our oleanders.
所以我们的夹竹桃里住着小妖精。
And on Saint Patrick's Day, we all lined up, and our mother clipped to our little Catholic school, red sweaters these green buttons that said, "Kiss me, I'm Irish" and shamrocks with blarney stones.
在圣帕特里克节那天，我们都排着队，我们的母亲穿着红色毛衣、上面写着“吻我，我是爱尔兰人”的绿色纽扣和带有巧言石的三叶草，穿着我们的天主教小学校。
And she avoided altogether some of the other stereotypes of Irishness, the idea of the morose, heavy drinker.
她完全避免了对爱尔兰人的其他一些刻板印象，即忧郁、酗酒的想法。
So she'd just select the parts she liked?
所以她就只选择她喜欢的部分？
Well, that was the great thing about the suburbs in California and anywhere else in the country where this great federal investment in the Cold War infrastructure was going on.
嗯，这就是加州郊区和美国其他任何地方的伟大之处，联邦对冷战基础设施的巨大投资正在进行。
These were brand new places.
这些都是全新的地方。
There was the opportunity to invent a culture, and you constructed that culture with what you had available to you.
有机会发明一种文化，你用你现有的东西构建了这种文化。
Can I ask you to talk for a minute ago about how you saw your dad when you were a kid?
Can I ask you to talk for a minute ago about how you saw your dad when you were a kid?
In your book, in your memoir, you describe him in scene after scene as showing up with lumber, and building stuff, and laying down new brick walkways, and building a deck behind the house, and constantly having one project after another.
In your book, in your memoir, you describe him in scene after scene as showing up with lumber, and building stuff, and laying down new brick walkways, and building a deck behind the house, and constantly having one project after another.
You write at one point, "There was nothing my father could not do himself apparently."
你曾经写道：“显然，没有什么事情是我父亲自己做不到的。”
He wasn't always successful.
他并不总是成功。
I think he spent maybe six months designing the sprinkler system for the backyard.
我想他花了大约六个月的时间设计后院的喷水灭火系统。
And when he finally turned it on, it was wondrous to behold.
当他最终打开它时，看到的真是奇妙。
The rain birds all swept around in their perfect arcs and what have you.
雨鸟们都以完美的弧线掠过，还有什么。
But the grass didn't grow.
但草并没有长出来。
As it turned out, he had picked the wrong seed for the soil, and the water didn't fully cover the ground.
事实证明，他选错了种子，导致水没有完全覆盖地面。
And as it turned out, much like aerospace itself, he had to keep going back and revising his plans.
事实证明，就像航空航天本身一样，他必须不断回头修改他的计划。
And he went terribly over budget.
他的预算严重超出了预算。
But in the end, he got the grass to grow.
但最终他还是让草长出来了。
And that was the main message there, which is that through technology and perseverance, you can accomplish anything.
这就是那里的主要信息，那就是通过技术和毅力，你可以完成任何事情。
Well, you've agreed to read a long excerpt from your book, Blue Sky Dream.
好吧，你已经同意阅读你的书《蓝天梦》中的长篇摘录。
You write about in the book what you call your "tribe," the aerospace workers and their families, moving into a valley that was first known as the Valley of Heart's Delight, building a home in a brand new subdivision with the Old World name Clarendon Manor.
You write about in the book what you call your "tribe," the aerospace workers and their families, moving into a valley that was first known as the Valley of Heart's Delight, building a home in a brand new subdivision with the Old World name Clarendon Manor.
Whenever I think of the house they bought and the development surrounding it, the earliest images that come to mind are of an ascetic barrenness to the streets.
Whenever I think of the house they bought and the development surrounding it, the earliest images that come to mind are of an ascetic barrenness to the streets.
The snapshots confirm it.
快照证实了这一点。
There I am with my new friends around a picnic table in the backyard.
我和新朋友们坐在后院的野餐桌旁。
Shirtless boys with mouths full of birthday cake.
赤裸上身的男孩嘴里塞满了生日蛋糕。
In the backyard, nothing but implanted dirt, a stripe of redwood fence, stucco, an open sky.
In the backyard, nothing but implanted dirt, a stripe of redwood fence, stucco, an open sky.
That was the emptiness being chased by thousands of other young families to similar backyards in various raw corners of the nation.
这就是成千上万的其他年轻家庭追逐的空虚，来到这个国家各个原始角落的类似后院。
"Didn't the sterility scare the hell out of you?" I've often asked my mother.
“没有把你吓坏了吗？”我经常问妈妈。
"Didn't you look around and wonder if you'd been stuck on a desert island?" The questions never phase her.
“你没有环顾四周，怀疑自己是否被困在荒岛上了？”这些问题从来没有影响过她。
"We were thrilled to death, not afraid at all.
“我们激动得要死，一点也不害怕。
Everyone else was moving in at the same time as us.
Everyone else was moving in at the same time as us.
It was a whole new adventure for us.
这对我们来说是一次全新的冒险。
For everyone." Everyone was arriving with a sense of forward momentum joined.
对于每个人来说。”每个人都带着一种前进的动力来到这里。
Everyone was taking courage from the sight of another orange moving van pulling in next door.
看到隔壁停着另一辆橙色的移动货车，每个人都鼓起了勇气。
A family just like us unloading pole lamps and cribs and Formica dining tables like our own.
像我们一样的家庭正在卸下像我们自己一样的杆灯、婴儿床和福米卡餐桌。
Having been given the emptiness we longed for, there lay ahead the task of pouring meaning into the vacuum.
Having been given the emptiness we longed for, there lay ahead the task of pouring meaning into the vacuum.
We were blithe conquers, my tribe.
我们是快乐的征服者，我的部落。
When we chose a new homeland, invaded a place, settled it, and made it over in our image, we did so with the smiling sense of our own inevitability.
When we chose a new homeland, invaded a place, settled it, and made it over in our image, we did so with the smiling sense of our own inevitability.
At first, we would establish a few outposts, a Pentagon-funded research university, say, or a bomber command center, or a missile testing range.
At first, we would establish a few outposts, a Pentagon-funded research university, say, or a bomber command center, or a missile testing range.
And then, over the next decade or two, we would arrive by the thousands and tens of thousands until nothing looked or felt as it had before.
然后，在接下来的一两年里，我们将成千上万地抵达，直到看起来或感觉上都不像以前那样了。
Yet whenever we sent our advance teams to someplace like the Valley of Heart's Delight, we did not cause panic in the populace.
但每当我们派出先遣队前往心悦谷之类的地方时，我们并没有引起民众的恐慌。
More likely, a flurry of joyous meetings of the Chambers of Commerce and Rotary clubs.
更有可能的是，商会和扶轮社举行一系列欢乐的会议。
You could understand then why families like mine tended to behave with a certain hubris.
那么你就可以理解为什么像我这样的家庭往往表现出某种傲慢的行为。
In the spring of 1962, the Valley of Heart's Delight was covered with blossoms.
1962年春天，心悦谷鲜花盛开。
Back then the cherry and plum and apricot trees would froth so white and pink that driving around the place felt like burrowing through cotton candy.
Back then the cherry and plum and apricot trees would froth so white and pink that driving around the place felt like burrowing through cotton candy.
Spanish colonizers had planted the first of these glades.
西班牙殖民者种植了第一片空地。
On warm evenings in the spring of 1962, this is what my father and mother would do.
1962 年春天温暖的夜晚，这就是我的父亲和母亲会做的事情。
After dinner, they would place my baby sister in her stroller, and the four of us would set out from the small, used house they were renting in an established subdivision, already half a dozen years old, named Strawberry Park.
After dinner, they would place my baby sister in her stroller, and the four of us would set out from the small, used house they were renting in an established subdivision, already half a dozen years old, named Strawberry Park.
We would walk six blocks and run out of sidewalk.
我们会步行六个街区，然后跑出人行道。
We would pick up a wide trail cut a foot and a half deep into the adobe ground, a winding road bed of waiting blacktop.
We would pick up a wide trail cut a foot and a half deep into the adobe ground, a winding road bed of waiting blacktop.
At a certain point, we would leave the road bed and make our way across muddy clay that was crosshatched by tractor treads, riven by pipe trenches.
At a certain point, we would leave the road bed and make our way across muddy clay that was crosshatched by tractor treads, riven by pipe trenches.
We would marvel at the cast concrete sewer sections lying about, gray, knee-scratching barrels big enough for me to crawl inside.
我们会对周围的浇筑混凝土下水道部分感到惊讶，灰色的、抓膝盖的桶大得足以让我爬进去。
We would breathe in the sap scent of two-by-fours stacked around us, the smell of plans ready to go forward.
我们会呼吸着周围堆积的二乘四的树液气味，这是准备好前进的计划的气味。
Finally, we would arrive at our destination, a collection of yellow and red ribbons tied to small wooden stakes sprouting in the mud.
最后，我们将到达目的地，一堆黄色和红色的丝带绑在小木桩上，在泥土中发芽。
These markers identified the outline of lot 242 of unit 6 of track 3113, exactly 14,500 square feet of emptiness that now belonged to us.
这些标记标出了 3113 号轨道 6 单元 242 号地块的轮廓，即现在属于我们的 14,500 平方英尺的空地。
All around the outline were piles of cherry and plum and apricot trees, their roots ripped from the ground.
轮廓周围是成堆的樱桃树、李子树和杏树，它们的根从地上被扯下来。
The spring blossoms still clinging to their tangled-up branches.
春天的花朵仍然紧贴在缠结的树枝上。
Our rite evolved with the season.
我们的仪式随着季节的变化而变化。
Early on, my father would go from stake to yellow-ribboned stake, telling us where the kitchen would be, where the front door would go, which windows would be getting the most sun.
早些时候，我父亲会从一个木桩到另一个黄丝带木桩，告诉我们厨房在哪里，前门在哪里，哪些窗户阳光照射最多。
Later, after the concrete foundation and plywood subflooring were in and the skeletons of walls were up, we would wander through the materializing form of our home, already inhabiting with our imaginations its perfect potentiality.
后来，在混凝土地基和胶合板底层地板铺好，墙壁的骨架竖起来之后，我们会在我们家的具体形式中漫步，已经充满了我们的想象力，它的完美潜力。
Within a decade after the coming of aerospace to the Valley of Heart's Delight, developers were shelling out nearly $100,000 per acre for any land left that might still be covered with blossoms.
在航空航天技术进入心悦谷后的十年内，开发商每英亩花费近 10 万美元，购买任何可能仍开满鲜花的剩余土地。
This should give an idea of the quiet force my people exerted whenever they entered a place.
这应该可以让我们了解我的人民每当进入一个地方时所施加的安静力量。
Power enough to undo a century-old economy and strip the blossoms from a valley once and for all.
其力量足以摧毁百年经济并一劳永逸地剥夺山谷中的花朵。
My people did sigh at the extinction of those blossoms.
我的人民确实为那些花朵的凋零而叹息。
But honestly, we did not mourn their disappearance in any deeply felt way.
但老实说，我们并没有以任何深切的方式哀悼他们的消失。
Certainly, we didn't feel guilt.
当然，我们并没有感到内疚。
We had not, after all, come to the Valley of Heart's Delight to join the circular rhythm of nature.
我们来到心悦谷毕竟不是为了加入大自然的循环节奏。
Our imagination was linear, proceeding forward and upward.
我们的想象力是线性的，向前和向上进行。
And our lines did not curve back on themselves, as did the seasons.
我们的线条并没有像季节那样自行弯曲。
We saw promise in the clean possibilities that arose once every blossom had been erased, never to return.
我们看到了干净的可能性的希望，一旦每朵花都被抹掉，就再也不会回来了。
Several valleys over from ours, Joan Didion watched the coming of my tribe with dread.
离我们几个山谷不远的地方，琼·迪迪恩（Joan Didion）恐惧地看着我们部落的到来。
We moved her to write, in a 1965 essay, how it felt to be a native daughter.
我们鼓励她在 1965 年的一篇文章中写下作为一个土生土长的女儿的感受。
To have come from a family who has always been in the Sacramento Valley and to see that the boom was on and the voice of the aerospace engineer would be heard in the land.
来自一个一直生活在萨克拉门托谷的家庭，看到繁荣正在兴起，航空工程师的声音在这片土地上被听到。
15,000 aerospace workers, almost all of them imported, had arrived on the outskirts of Sacramento to join Aerojet General, a maker of missile boosters.
15,000 名航空航天工人（几乎全部是进口的）已抵达萨克拉门托郊区，加入导弹助推器制造商 Aerojet General。
Joan Didion's family was, like the orchard people of the Valley of Heart's Delight, a family tied to agriculture with 100 years of circular rhythms behind them.
琼·迪迪安 (Joan Didion) 的家族与心悦谷的果园居民一样，都是与农业息息相关的家族，有着 100 年的循环节律。
Hers were a people primly insular and tragic-minded, according to the native daughter.
据她的女儿说，她的民族本质上是孤立的、具有悲剧性的。
Her valley was a place where incautious children visiting from out of town often would drown in the river, disappear forever.
她的山谷是一个地方，外地来的不小心的孩子经常会被淹死在河里，永远消失。
And the old locals would see a proper lesson in that, would say, as Joan Didion's grandmother did, "They were from away.
老当地人会从中得到适当的教训，就像琼·迪迪安的祖母那样，他们会说：“他们来自远方。
Their parents had no business letting them in the river."
他们的父母没有权利让他们下河。”
In another essay written five years later, Didion gets at the profound difference between her people and mine.
在五年后写的另一篇文章中，迪迪安谈到了她的人民和我的人民之间的深刻差异。
She writes of "growing up convinced that the heart of darkness lies in not some error of social organization, but in man's own blood." She reveals herself, in other words, to be a pessimist about human endeavour, engineered and executed on a grand scale.
她写道，“在成长过程中，我坚信黑暗的核心不在于社会组织的某些错误，而在于人类自己的血液。”换句话说，她表明自己对人类的努力是一个悲观主义者，而人类的努力是大规模设计和执行的。
How different from my tribe who would say instead, "If incautious children might drown in a river, let us erect a cyclone fence.
与我的部落有多么不同，他们会说：“如果不小心的孩子可能会在河里淹死，让我们竖起飓风围栏。
Even drive the river underground, leaving behind a manufactured surface that was dry and safe, empty, and speaking of promise." That, after all, is what was done with the creek the ran by Clarendon Manor.
甚至将河流开入地下，留下干燥、安全、空旷、充满希望的人工表面。”毕竟，这就是对克拉伦登庄园管理的小溪所做的事情。
Within 10 years of my family's arrival, the Valley of Heart's Delight was no longer green.
我的家人来到这里后的十年内，心悦谷不再是绿色的。
It had become a vast matrix of expressways, and freeways, and Clarendon Manors, a vast matrix of companies making technology primarily for the government.
它已经成为一个由高速公路和克拉伦登庄园组成的巨大矩阵，一个主要为政府制造技术的公司的巨大矩阵。
The population had grown many times over in those 10 years, and we no longer heard the Valley of Heart's Delight called that anymore.
这十年里，人口增长了很多倍，我们再也听不到心悦谷这个名字了。
In fact, no one I knew had ever used that sentimental name.
事实上，我认识的人中没有人用过这个感伤的名字。
While I was growing up, my family simply had called it "The Valley." Or as it was officially termed on the government studies in the plans of various developers, "the Santa Clara Valley." It would not be until a time distant, well into the 1970s, that we would begin calling our home "Silicon Valley."
在我成长的过程中，我的家人简单地称它为“山谷”。或者正如政府在各个开发商的计划研究中所正式称呼的那样，“圣克拉拉谷”。直到遥远的 20 世纪 70 年代，我们才开始称我们的家为“硅谷”。
There was yet another rite of spring practiced by my family, a rite that became possible once the invasion of my tribe was all but complete, once nearly all the blossoms had been replaced by settlements like our own.
我的家人还举行了另一种春天的仪式，一旦我的部落的入侵几乎完成，一旦几乎所有的花朵都被像我们这样的定居点所取代，这种仪式就成为可能。
On an evening that was bright and windy, but too warm to be winter anymore, my father would come home from Lockheed with a kite or two, balsa sticks wrapped tightly with colorful tissue paper.
在一个晴朗多风的夜晚，但温暖得不再是冬天了，我父亲会从洛克希德公司带着一两只风筝回家，轻木棍用彩色薄纸紧紧包裹着。
If the next morning was a Saturday, he would put the kites together for us.
如果第二天早上是星期六，他就会为我们把风筝放在一起。
Tear us a tail from an old sheet, make a string bridle that held the kite just so.
从旧床单上撕下一条尾巴，制作一个用来固定风筝的绳索。
Help us launch the kite, and send it up over the tract homes.
帮助我们放飞风筝，并把它送到住宅区的上空。
For just this very purpose, my father kept what seemed a mile of twine on an enormous spool.
正是为了这个目的，我父亲在一个巨大的线轴上放了似乎一英里长的麻线。
And so the kite would climb higher and higher until it became a shimmying dot against the blue.
就这样，风筝越爬越高，直到成为蓝色中闪烁的点。
At that point, my father would go into his garage and make a small parachute.
那时，我父亲会走进他的车库制作一个小降落伞。
He would unfold a paper napkin and tie its corners to four strands of string, drawing the other ends of the string together, and knotting them around a bolt for weight.
他会展开一张餐巾纸，将其角系在四股绳子上，将绳子的另一端拉在一起，然后将它们打结在螺栓上以增加重量。
He would stick a bit of reinforcing tape in the center of the napkin and pass through that a bent pin, making a hook that poked out of the top of the parachute.
他会在餐巾的中央粘上一段加固胶带，然后用一根弯曲的销钉穿过它，形成一个从降落伞顶部伸出的钩子。
Next, my father would write our phone number on the parachute with the words, "If found, please call."
接下来，父亲会把我们的电话号码写在降落伞上，上面写着：“如果找到，请打电话。”
"Ready for take off?" my father would say, as he grabbed hold of the taut kite string.
“准备好起飞了吗？”我父亲一边说，一边抓住绷紧的风筝线。
And then a miraculous thing would happen.
然后奇迹的事情就会发生。
Driven by the wind, the parachute would skitter up the line, joining the kite high in the sky in what seemed an instant.
在风的推动下，降落伞会沿着绳子滑行，似乎在一瞬间就与高空的风筝汇合在一起。
When it reached the top, my father would say, "Give her a jerk." And the parachute would fall away from the kite and drift in whichever direction the wind was blowing, until we could see it no longer.
当它到达顶部时，我父亲会说：“给她一个混蛋。”降落伞会从风筝上掉下来，向风吹的方向飘去，直到我们再也看不到它为止。
Then we'd begin the wait for the phone to ring.
然后我们就开始等待电话铃声。
The wait for someone to call and say they had our parachute.
等待有人打电话说他们有我们的降落伞。
If hours went by, my mother might suggest a prayer to Saint Anthony, finder of lost items.
如果几个小时过去了，我母亲可能会建议向失物发现者圣安东尼祈祷。
"Tony, Tony, listen, listen.
“托尼，托尼，听着，听着。
Hurry, hurry.
快点，快点。
Something's missing.
缺少一些东西。
You have to believe."
你必须相信。”
If we said the prayer and did believe, the ring would come, and someone would say, "Got your-- I guess it's a parachute here.
如果我们祈祷并相信，铃声就会响起，有人会说：“收到了——我猜这是一个降落伞。
Landed in my backyard.
降落在我的后院。
Almost ran over it with the mower."
差点被割草机碾过。”
My father would write down the address, and he would get out the street map.
我父亲会写下地址，然后拿出街道地图。
He would pinpoint our destination, and we older kids would set off on our Stingray bikes, having been given a reason to trace a route we never would have traced otherwise, so empty and so much the same was every street for miles around.
他会准确地指出我们的目的地，我们这些大一点的孩子会骑着黄貂鱼自行车出发，因为我们有理由去追踪一条我们永远不会追踪的路线，周围几英里的每条街道都是那么空旷，那么相似。
We would leave our cul-de-sac named Pine Hill Court, where there was neither a pine nor a hill, and we would pedal far beyond Springwood Drive and past Happy Valley Way, ending up in some cul-de-sac we had not known existed.
我们会离开名为 Pine Hill Court 的死胡同，那里既没有松树，也没有小山，我们会骑着自行车远远超出斯普林伍德路，经过欢乐谷路，最后到达一些我们不知道存在的死胡同。
And there would be a man about my father's age with a similarly receding hairline and knit sport shirt.
还有一个和我父亲年龄相仿的男人，发际线也同样后退，穿着针织运动衫。
A man who seemed to be pleased at the serendipitous fun our parachute had brought into his Saturday.
一个男人似乎对我们的降落伞给他的周六带来的偶然乐趣感到高兴。
A man who safely could be assumed to do blue sky work for a living.
一个可以安全地被认为以蓝天工作为生的人。
Anywhere we cared to drop a parachute from the sky, there would be someone like him.
任何我们想从天上投下降落伞的地方，都会有像他这样的人。
A house and a family like his, and like ours.
房子和家庭就像他的，也像我们的。
Well, the vocal stylings of Mr. John Wayne.
嗯，约翰·韦恩先生的声音风格。
Our program was produced today by Nancy Updike and me with Alix Spiegel and Julie Snyder.
今天我们的节目由南希·厄普代克、我、阿利克斯·斯皮格尔和朱莉·斯奈德共同制作。
Music help today from Mr. John Connors.
今天约翰·康纳斯先生提供音乐帮助。
Today's program was first broadcast back during the 20th century, all the way back in 1997.
今天的节目首次播出可以追溯到 20 世纪，一直追溯到 1997 年。
This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
Our website, www.thisamericanlife.org, where you can get our free weekly podcast and listen to old shows online for absolutely free.
我们的网站 www.thisamericanlife.org，您可以在其中获得我们的免费每周播客并完全免费在线收听老节目。
[FUNDING CREDITS] WBEZ management oversight for our program by Mr. Torey Malatia, who's going to buy you a puppy--
[资金来源] WBEZ 管理部门由 Torey Malatia 先生对我们的项目进行监督，他将为您买一只小狗——
And daddy will run over it with the truck.
爸爸会用卡车碾过它。
I'm Ira Glass, back next week with more stories of This American Life.
我是艾拉·格拉斯，下周回来，带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。