477: Getting Away With It - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #477 | October 13, 2023 477: Getting Away With It Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 477 集 | 2023 年 10 月 13 日 477：逍遥法外 注：《This American Life》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.
如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue Ira Glass From WBEZ Chicago, it's This American Life.
序言 来自 WBEZ 芝加哥的 Ira Glass，这就是美国生活。
My name is Ken Hegan, and I'm a travel writer.
我叫肯·赫根 (Ken Hegan)，是一名旅行作家。
So I'm on a flight to Minneapolis sitting next to Ken Hegan, 6'2" travel writer.
因此，我在飞往明尼阿波利斯的航班上，坐在 6 英尺 2 英寸的旅行作家肯·赫根 (Ken Hegan) 旁边。
And Ken is trying to pull off a scheme that is not at all friendly, though, to his credit, he feels bad about what he's doing.
肯正试图实现一个一点也不友好的计划，但值得赞扬的是，他对自己所做的事情感到很糟糕。
Well, I can tell you I've only had about four hours sleep chiefly because I was a little nervous about trying something new.
好吧，我可以告诉你，我只睡了大约四个小时，主要是因为我对尝试新事物有点紧张。
What I just did was I clamped these two pieces of plastic that look like the monsters from Alien-- like those little alien heads-- and they're clamps.
我刚刚所做的就是夹住这两块塑料，它们看起来像《异形》中的怪物——就像那些外星人的小脑袋——它们就是夹子。
You basically slide these clamps onto your tray table, and it prevents the person in front of you from tilting back and slamming into your knees, if you're a tall man like I am.
基本上，您可以将这些夹子滑到您的小桌板上，如果您像我一样高个子，它可以防止您前面的人向后倾斜并撞到您的膝盖。
He'd read about these clamps on the internet and thought that is simultaneously the most inventive and the most passive aggressive gadget he'd ever heard of.
他在互联网上读到过有关这些夹子的信息，并认为这是他所听说过的最具创造性和最被动攻击性的小玩意。
It's called the Knee Defender.
它被称为护膝。
And as a tall guy who flies two or three times a month for his job, he decided he had to try them.
作为一个每个月要坐飞机两到三次的高个子，他决定必须尝试一下。
Attaching the clamps to the arms of his tray table was simple, but next came the part that kept Ken awake the night before.
将夹子固定在小桌板扶手上很简单，但接下来的部分却让肯在前一天晚上彻夜难眠。
The makers of Knee Defender have something called a courtesy card that you're supposed to then hand to the person in front of you to let them know you're deploying the Knee Defender clamps.
护膝的制造商有一种叫做礼节卡的东西，您应该将其交给前面的人，让他们知道您正在部署护膝夹。
So I just tapped the woman's shoulder in front of me, said this message is for you.
于是我就拍了拍面前女人的肩膀，说这条信息是给你的。
The card says, "This is a Knee Defender courtesy card, TM--" trademark.
卡片上写着“这是一张 Knee Defender 礼遇卡，TM——”商标。
"I am using Knee Defender, TM.
“我正在使用 Knee Defender，TM。
Knee Defender, TM is a small plastic device that helps me protect myself by limiting how much the seat in front of me can recline.
Knee Defender, TM 是一种小型塑料装置，通过限制我前面的座椅的倾斜程度来帮助我保护自己。
I wanted to let you know about this."
我想让你知道这件事。”
And then underneath, Ken checked the box that said that her seat would be able to recline two inches.
然后，肯在下面勾选了一个方框，上面写着她的座椅可以倾斜两英寸。
Ken had been scared that handling this to somebody, he was going to end up in some horrible argument with a stranger on a plane.
肯担心如果把这件事交给别人，他最终会在飞机上与一个陌生人发生可怕的争吵。
He's Canadian-- not to put too fine a point on that.
他是加拿大人——不要过分强调这一点。
He just doesn't like confrontation.
他只是不喜欢对抗。
We discuss what happens next.
我们讨论接下来会发生什么。
And remember, as we discuss this, we're sitting in the row directly behind the woman that he handed the card to, hoping that she cannot hear us because of the noise of the plane, which is louder than you might think.
请记住，当我们讨论这个问题时，我们坐在他递给卡片的那位女士后面的一排，希望她听不到我们的声音，因为飞机的噪音比你想象的要大。
So I hand her the card, and then my hands were sweaty and shaky.
于是我把卡片递给她，然后我的手就出汗了，颤抖着。
So for about a minute, I just sort of was paralyzed.
大约有一分钟的时间，我有点瘫痪了。
Eventually, she handed me the card back and slight nodded her head, didn't say a word.
最终，她把卡还给了我，轻轻地点了点头，没有再说什么。
Then I asked her, hey, are you OK with this?
然后我问她，嘿，你同意吗？
And then her tone changed.
然后她的语气就变了。
She sounded very cranky and said, yeah, you don't see me move my seat back, do you?
她听起来很暴躁，说，是的，你没有看到我把座位往后移，是吗？
And then you and I are sitting next to each other.
然后你和我坐在一起。
You wrote a little note on a piece of paper.
你在一张纸上写了一张小纸条。
Do you want to just read what it said?
您想只读一下上面写的内容吗？
Yeah, I wrote a little note to you because I couldn't really talk.
是的，我给你写了一张小纸条，因为我无法真正说话。
And yeah, my note said, I feel like a total dick right now.
是的，我的便条上写着，我现在感觉自己就是个混蛋。
I mean, how would you feel?
我的意思是，你会有什么感觉？
Would you feel comfortable doing this?
这样做你会感到舒服吗？
Me, no. No. Ken Hegan Yeah, if somebody did this to me, I'd think, man, you're just being a bully.
我，不。不。 Ken Hegan 是的，如果有人这样对我，我会想，伙计，你就是一个恶霸。
And I would immediately start looking for cues in their behavior beyond the card that they're a dick.
我会立即开始在他们的行为中寻找线索，而不仅仅是他们是个混蛋。
I'd be like-- I'd be looking for extra reasons to hate them.
我会想——我会寻找额外的理由来讨厌他们。
So yeah, I'm conflicted right now because hey, I got some space here.
所以是的，我现在很矛盾，因为嘿，我这里有一些空间。
My knees feel good.
我的膝盖感觉很好。
I'm still being a dick.
我还是个屌丝
Yeah.
是的。
Ken Hegan And I'm getting away with it.
肯·赫根（Ken Hegan） 我就侥幸逃脱了惩罚。
Well, you're getting away with it in the sense that her chair is up.
好吧，从她的椅子已经抬起的意义上来说，你就逃脱了惩罚。
Like, you're not getting away with it in a sense of she probably thinks you're a dick.
就像，从某种意义上说，你无法逃脱惩罚，因为她可能认为你是个混蛋。
Absolutely true.
绝对正确。
Yeah.
是的。
Ira Glass This is not the kind of getting away with it that most of us want.
艾拉·格拉斯 这并不是我们大多数人想要的那种侥幸逃脱的惩罚。
Most of us want total getting away with it, which means we don't just get our way.
我们大多数人都希望完全逃脱惩罚，这意味着我们不会随心所欲。
In addition, nobody thinks badly of us.
此外，没有人认为我们不好。
You know?
你知道吗？
Nobody judges.
没有人评判。
That's what we want.
这就是我们想要的。
That's just as true for grown men as for little boys.
对于成年男子和小男孩来说都是如此。
Do you think you're going to use the courtesy card and the Knee Defender again?
您认为您会再次使用礼遇卡和护膝吗？
I will absolutely use the Knee Defender again.
我绝对会再次使用护膝。
The card, I don't think I'm ever going to use this again.
这张卡，我想我不会再使用它了。
No, I feel too bad.
不，我感觉太糟糕了。
So basically, your hope is going to be that the people, when they try to push their seat back, they're just going to think, oh, the seat's broken.
所以基本上，你的希望是，当人们试图将座椅向后推时，他们只会想，哦，座椅坏了。
Yep.
是的。
Yeah, basically, I'm going to be a sneak.
是的，基本上，我会偷偷摸摸。
Be tricky.
狡猾一点。
Let them believe the seat's broken.
让他们相信座位坏了。
I totally relate to that choice.
我完全同意这个选择。
I think lots of us are like this-- sneaks on a plane.
我想我们很多人都是这样——偷偷地坐飞机。
If we can get away with something completely with no one ever knowing, nobody judging us, and-- just as important-- nobody really hurt, we give it a shot.
如果我们能完全逃脱惩罚，没有人知道，没有人评判我们，而且——同样重要的是——没有人真正受到伤害，我们就会尝试一下。
Today on our program, we have stories of people sneaking their way through, putting one over, getting away with it.
今天，在我们的节目中，我们讲述了一些人偷偷溜进去，把一个东西扔掉，然后侥幸逃脱的故事。
Some people justifying it by saying they're doing it for others, for the greater good.
有些人辩解说，他们这样做是为了别人，为了更大的利益。
Some not bothering with that-- they just don't care.
有些人并不关心这个——他们只是不在乎。
We have a dad hauling marijuana for the sake of his family.
我们有一位父亲为了家人而吸食大麻。
We have you, our listeners, setting things on fire and cheating in school.
我们的听众，你们在学校放火、作弊。
We have politicians lying in a wholesale and utterly effective way for the sake of four-year-olds.
我们的政客为了四岁的孩子而以大规模且完全有效的方式撒谎。
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
Act One: Take Your Kid to Work Day Ira Glass Act One, Take Your Kid to Work Day.
第一幕：带你的孩子去上班日 Ira Glass 第一幕，带你的孩子去上班日。
Of course, the most important thing, if you want to get away with some kind of wrongdoing, is that you have a plan-- a foolproof, well thought out plan, with safeguards and contingencies along the way to guard against everything you could think of that could possibly, possibly go wrong.
当然，如果你想摆脱某种不当行为，最重要的是你有一个计划——一个万无一失、经过深思熟虑的计划，一路上有保障措施和意外事件，以防止你能想到的一切可能出错的情况。
Domingo Martinez has this story about his parents and a plan of theirs years and years ago.
多明戈·马丁内斯有一个关于他父母的故事以及他们多年前的计划。
By 1986, Dad had become a truck driver with nothing left to haul but marijuana.
到 1986 年，爸爸已经成为一名卡车司机，除了大麻什么也没有可以运。
Through his early 30s, he could do little with the trucking business he'd inherited from Grandpa except watch as it crumbled around him.
30岁出头的时候，他对从祖父那里继承的卡车运输生意几乎无能为力，只能眼睁睁地看着它在他身边崩溃。
Back then, he began his days by throwing open the door to the bedroom I shared with my brother, Dan.
那时，他打开了我和哥哥丹合住的卧室的门，开始了他的一天。
He'd stand there in his underwear, looking like a tall diapered child, and say, you two get up.
他会穿着内衣站在那里，看上去就像一个穿着尿布的高个孩子，然后说，你们两个站起来。
He would end the day drinking a lot of $1.50 Budweisers at the shanty bars that littered the port of Brownsville.
一天结束时，他会在布朗斯维尔港遍布的棚屋酒吧里喝很多 1.5 美元的百威啤酒。
At home, Mom kept the bookkeeping.
在家里，妈妈负责记账。
She watched the flow of money slow to a trickle and then stop outright when I was in middle school.
当我上中学时，她看着金钱慢慢流淌，最后完全停止。
My brother, sisters, and I knew things were dire when our mother stopped shopping at El Centro Supermarket-- the nice grocery store, as she'd always told us-- and started bringing home bags from Lopez Supermarket, the poor people grocery store.
当我们的母亲停止在埃尔森特罗超市（这是一家不错的杂货店，正如她总是告诉我们的那样）购物并开始从洛佩兹超市（穷人的杂货店）买东西回家时，我的兄弟姐妹和我知道事情很可怕。
One morning, Mom surprises me by showing up at my seventh grade algebra class and removing me, getting us on the road out of Brownsville, headed north.
一天早上，妈妈出现在我七年级的代数课上，让我大吃一惊，她带我上路，离开布朗斯维尔，向北行驶。
There's no explanation.
没有解释。
"Sientáte y lla callete," she snaps at me.
“Sientáte y lla callete，”她对我厉声说道。
Sit down and shut up.
坐下来，闭嘴。
I don't know why I didn't guess what we were doing that morning-- that Mom and I were lookouts for Dad, who was on the road somewhere behind us in one of his flat-nosed tractor trailers, carrying a large load of marijuana and headed north.
我不知道为什么我没有猜到那天早上我们在做什么——妈妈和我在寻找爸爸，爸爸开着一辆平头拖车在我们身后的路上，载着一大堆大麻向北行驶。
I had heard the stories, knew some of the tactics of smuggling by this point, but I didn't make the connection-- that Mom and I were driving ahead of Dad to make sure the customs station was closed, and if it happened to be open, we were supposed to turn back and warn him.
我听过这些故事，知道了一些走私的策略，但我没有意识到——妈妈和我在爸爸前面开车，以确保海关站关闭，如果海关站碰巧开放，我们应该回去警告他。
This was back in the 1980s before the Patriot Act, when there were two US customs checkpoints blocking the migration of drugs, fruit, people, reptiles, and parrots on the roads between the United States and Mexico, both about 100 miles north of the Mexican border at highway choke points.
这要追溯到 20 世纪 80 年代《爱国者法案》出台之前，当时美国和墨西哥之间的公路上有两个美国海关检查站，阻止毒品、水果、人、爬行动物和鹦鹉的迁徙，这两个检查站都位于墨西哥边境以北约 100 英里的高速公路阻塞点。
The station on Highway 77 in Sarita was the busier and the better financed.
位于萨里塔 (Sarita) 的 77 号高速公路上的车站较为繁忙，资金也较好。
The checkpoint in Hebbronville, though, was an airstream trailer with an attached carport to protect the agents from the sun.
不过，赫伯伦维尔的检查站是一辆气流拖车，带有一个车库，可以保护特工免受阳光照射。
And it would often close for breakfast or lunch.
它通常会在早餐或午餐时间关闭。
So we were headed towards that one this morning, going north on Highway 281, driving through the scenery of asthmatic plants and stunted trees.
所以今天早上我们就朝着那个地方出发，沿 281 号高速公路向北行驶，穿过一片令人喘息的植物和矮小的树木。
The car is hot, no air conditioning.
车里很热，没有空调。
My mom and I are saying nothing to one another.
我和我妈妈什么也没说。
We have each decided that the other is unworthy of conversation.
我们都认为对方不值得交谈。
We stare out the windows and think very different things.
我们凝视着窗外，思考着截然不同的事情。
Mom is thinking about the $100 she and Dad had spent before 6 o'clock that morning-- $100 that would help them make $2,000 if things went right, because their first stop on this felony excursion was to Dad's cúrandera whom we knew as La Señora, Dad's personal witchdoctor, for an emergency session.
妈妈正在想着她和爸爸那天早上 6 点之前花掉的 100 美元——如果一切顺利的话，这 100 美元可以帮助他们赚到 2,000 美元，因为他们这次重罪之旅的第一站是去爸爸的库兰德拉，我们知道她是爸爸的私人巫医拉·塞诺拉 (La Señora)，参加紧急会议。
They were let right through at 5:00 in the morning, and they had only one burning question-- will the checkpoint be open?
他们在早上 5:00 就被放行了，他们只有一个紧迫的问题——检查站会开放吗？
After years of sitting through these sessions with my grandmother, I didn't have to be there to know exactly how it went in the cúrandera's office.
经过多年与祖母一起参加这些会议后，我不必亲自到场就可以确切地知道库兰德拉办公室的情况。
La Señora is older, matronly, dresses in a thin frock with her hair pulled back in a bun.
拉夫人年纪更大了，看上去像个主妇，穿着一件薄连衣裙，头发在脑后盘成一个发髻。
She has my parents sit across from her desk in a black leather love seat with chrome handles.
她让我的父母坐在她办公桌对面的黑色真皮双人座椅上，上面有镀铬把手。
A panorama of photos hang around her office, some wallet-sized, others larger and in portrait.
她的办公室里挂满了全景照片，有些有钱包大小，有些则更大，是肖像照。
A pencil sketch of a Camaro by one of her grandsons hangs next to a window.
窗边挂着她的一个孙子画的科迈罗的铅笔素描。
She listens closely to their question, nodding sleepily at their preoccupation, sympathizing, understanding.
她仔细地听着他们的问题，对他们的专注点点头，表示同情和理解。
They've reached a decision, and they can't turn back, they tell her.
他们告诉她，他们已经做出了决定，不能回头。
They need to do it.
他们需要这样做。
No other choice anymore.
没有其他选择了。
She stands up abruptly and walks behind her desk, which is cluttered with sheets of notebook paper crawling with ink-- illegible notes, names of people, sets of cryptic numbers, home addresses of saints.
她突然站起来，走到桌子后面，桌子上堆满了沾满墨水的笔记本纸——难以辨认的笔记、人名、一组神秘的数字、圣人的家庭住址。
She closes her eyes and scribbles something on her yellow legal pad-- nonsense to anyone else reading it.
她闭上眼睛，在黄色便笺簿上写下一些东西——对于其他读它的人来说都是无稽之谈。
On her desk are two cheap leaded crystal bottles, each filled with a clear liquid.
她的桌子上有两个廉价的含铅水晶瓶，每个瓶子里都装着透明的液体。
She gently reaches for a matching shot glass and lifts it to the light, making it sparkle.
她轻轻地伸手拿了一个配套的小酒杯，把它举到灯光下，让它闪闪发光。
She places the glass on the surface before her and pours from one bottle, then the other.
她将玻璃杯放在她面前的表面上，从一个瓶子里倒水，然后从另一个瓶子里倒水。
When the two clear liquids mix, they turn a deep crimson and thicken like plasma.
当两种清澈的液体混合时，它们会变成深红色并像血浆一样变稠。
She nods her head as if her suspicions have been confirmed.
她点点头，仿佛她的怀疑得到了证实。
She produces a glass orb filled with water, sitting on a black plastic ring.
她拿出一个装满水的玻璃球，放在黑色塑料环上。
She sits up straight, closes her eyes, and regulates her breathing into a loud, rhythmic inhalation, exhalation, that unconsciously forces Mom and Dad to do the same.
她坐直，闭上眼睛，调整呼吸，大声、有节奏地吸气、呼气，这无意识地迫使爸爸妈妈也这么做。
After a few seconds, she opens her eyes suddenly and strikes the glass orb with a metal wand, making it ring in the clear morning air.
几秒钟后，她突然睁开眼睛，用金属棒敲打玻璃球，让它在清晨清澈的空气中响起。
Then she lifts the orb between her two pudgy hands and stares deeply into the inverted image of the room around it.
然后她用两只矮胖的手举起了球体，深深地凝视着球体周围房间的倒影。
Sitting opposite this chicanery and watching everything she does, you're drawn to the ritual, and you can't help but try to figure it out, too.
坐在这个诡计对面，看着她所做的一切，你会被这个仪式所吸引，你也会情不自禁地试图弄清楚它。
No, she says with certainty.
不，她肯定地说。
The checkpoint will not be open this morning.
检查站今天早上不会开放。
Go in peace.
平静地走吧。
God be with you.
愿上帝与你同在。
When Mom and I reach the checkpoint at 11:45 that morning, it is very much open for business.
那天早上11点45分，当我和妈妈到达检查站时，检查站已经很开门营业了。
A line of cars five deep stretches back from the underbudgeted airstream trailer.
一排汽车从预算不足的气流拖车向后延伸了五层。
Our job now is to go through and then turn back around and report to Dad that his doom was indeed imminent.
我们现在的工作就是走过去，然后回头向爸爸报告，他的厄运确实即将来临。
Mom is visibly shaken.
妈妈显然很震惊。
She turns off the radio with a hard click and considers this-- considers her options.
她用力关掉收音机，然后考虑这一点——考虑她的选择。
From the car, we can see a skinny middle-aged white guy in green Border Patrol garb, sitting on a reclining chair in the open doorway of the Airstream trailer.
从车上，我们可以看到一名瘦削的中年白人，穿着绿色边境巡逻队服装，坐在气流拖车敞开的门口的躺椅上。
He's facing the cars as they pass under the tin roof.
当汽车从铁皮屋顶下驶过时，他正对着汽车。
It must have been 110 degrees inside the trailer, 100 in the shade.
拖车内的温度一定是 110 度，阴凉处则为 100 度。
From his position, never bothering to get up, the agent sits fanning himself with the newspaper and sleepily peers into the cars, asking if everyone is an American citizen, waiting for an accented answer, smiling, and then waving them through, like a sympathetic priest granting absolution.
特工从他的位置上坐着，拿着报纸给自己扇风，睡眼惺忪地看着车里，询问每个人是否都是美国公民，等待着带有口音的回答，微笑着，然后挥手让他们通过，就像一位富有同情心的牧师在赦免他们。
Hi, where y'all going to today, asks the skinny little man.
“嗨，你们今天要去哪儿？”瘦小的男人问道。
Mom's window is now only halfway open, and in her nervousness, she rolls it all the way up.
妈妈的窗户现在只打开了一半，她紧张地把窗户完全打开了。
Hi, sorry.
嗨，抱歉。
I mean, San Antonio, as she opens the window.
我是说，圣安东尼奥，当她打开窗户时。
Y'all American citizens?
你们都是美国公民吗？
Yes, she says, as she leans back so he could get a clear look at me, nodding my head.
是的，她说，一边向后靠去，以便他能清楚地看着我，一边点点头。
I don't say anything except the quiet yep when I nod, but he has not heard me.
我除了点头时轻声“是”之外什么也没说，但他没有听到我的声音。
There is an uncomfortable pause, I think because they're supposed to hear your accent.
有一个不舒服的停顿，我想是因为他们应该听到你的口音。
There is an anxious beat, and he still hasn't let us go when I say, yes, I am, a bit too enthusiastically.
一阵焦急，当我说“是的，我是”时，他仍然没有放开我们，有点太热情了。
Mom laughs nervously.
妈妈紧张地笑了。
She had been hoping our light skin would exonerate us without a problem.
她一直希望我们浅色的皮肤能够毫无问题地证明我们无罪。
Y'all have a nice day, he says, like he hasn't noticed anything awkward.
“你们今天过得很愉快，”他说，就像他没有注意到任何尴尬的事情一样。
We drive through, and I feel her seethe for the next few miles.
我们开车经过，我感觉到她在接下来的几英里里沸腾了。
That was about noon.
那时大约是中午。
Somewhere behind us, at a roadside rest stop, Dad and my older brother Dan are waiting in Dad's tractor trailer, which is attached to the trailer with the marijuana.
在我们身后的某个路边休息站，爸爸和我的哥哥丹正在爸爸的拖拉机拖车里等待，拖车与装有大麻的拖车相连。
The two center I beams that run the length of the trailer make perfect housing once you weld metal plates all along the underside and at the tail end.
一旦您沿拖车底部和尾部焊接金属板，沿着拖车长度延伸的两个中心工字梁即可形成完美的外壳。
It creates a long rectangular box sealed at the rear end with the axle of the rig, where 20 40-pound blocks of marijuana can be hidden.
它创建了一个长方形盒子，在后端与设备的轴密封，其中可以隐藏 20 块 40 磅重的大麻。
This is what Dad and Dan are carrying.
这是爸爸和丹带着的东西。
I wondered dimly if Dan has figured out what he's doing out here on the road north when he should be in high school.
我隐隐约约地想知道丹是否已经弄清楚当他应该上高中时他在北边的路上做什么。
But Dan has always been more streetwise, much savvier than me.
但丹一直比我更有街头智慧、更精明。
I figure that if I figured it out, he'd have figured it out long before.
我想，如果我明白了，他早就明白了。
Mom and I drive on to Hebbronville.
妈妈和我开车前往赫布伦维尔。
I'm dehydrated.
我脱水了。
I want to stop at a store.
我想在一家商店停下来。
We can't, she says to me.
我们不能，她对我说。
We have to turn back.
我们必须回头。
I think we're behind.
我认为我们落后了。
Still, I'm hungry and really thirsty, so I persist.
不过，我又饿又渴，所以我还是坚持了下来。
Certainly we have time to go to a convenience store.
当然我们有时间去便利店。
They can't have scheduled this thing to hinge on a few minutes.
他们不可能把这件事安排在几分钟之内。
Certainly they've devised this more cleverly than that.
当然，他们把这个设计得比那个更聪明。
Please, I plead.
求你了，我恳求道。
Just stop at the 7-Eleven.
就停在 7-11 便利店吧。
Grudgingly, she pilots the noisy car around the small town and finds a convenience store.
她无奈地驾驶着吵闹的汽车绕着小镇转了一圈，找到了一家便利店。
I get out with a couple of dollars and come up short when I try paying for some donuts and a chocolate milk.
我带着几美元出去了，但当我尝试支付一些甜甜圈和巧克力牛奶时，却发现钱不够了。
I return to the car for more money.
我回到车上要更多的钱。
Just get in, she yells.
进去吧，她喊道。
And I do, leaving the food at the counter.
我这样做了，把食物留在柜台上。
Mom whips the car around, and I'm in trouble, used to it by now.
妈妈把车开过来，我就遇到麻烦了，我现在已经习惯了。
We travel like that for a few minutes.
我们就这样旅行了几分钟。
And when the checkpoint is back in sight, we hold our breath so the guy won't see us.
当检查站重新出现在我们的视线中时，我们屏住呼吸，以免那家伙看到我们。
And right then, we see Dad and Dan and the trailer heading right for the checkpoint.
就在那时，我们看到爸爸和丹以及拖车正驶向检查站。
Dad had become nervous, or maybe brave, or maybe he was blinded by his $100 faith in his cúrandera and had charged forth without waiting for Mom's report.
爸爸变得紧张，也许是勇敢，也许是他被他对他的 100 美元的信念蒙蔽了双眼，没有等妈妈的报告就冲了出去。
Oh, god, my mother says.
哦，天哪，我妈妈说。
And all the blood drains from my face from just the tone in her voice.
仅仅因为她的语气，我脸上的血色就消失了。
I had never heard her voice so charged with fear.
我从来没有听过她的声音如此充满恐惧。
Oh, god, she says again.
哦，上帝，她又说了一遍。
With her left hand, she grabs the knob that controls the headlights and flashes at Dad, who is only a few hundred feet from the checkpoint.
她用左手抓住控制车头灯的旋钮，向距离检查站只有几百英尺的爸爸闪光。
She flashes four times, in clear view of anyone who is paying attention.
她闪烁了四次，任何注意的人都可以清楚地看到。
I wonder if that is her signal that the checkpoint is open, but question the wisdom of doing it while he is next in line in full view of the guy at the checkpoint, were he to look over his shoulder and see the noisy southbound car that just drove through not 30 minutes before.
我想知道这是否是她表示检查站开放的信号，但质疑在他排在下一个、在检查站的那个人的视野中这样做是否明智，因为他回头看去，看到了不到30分钟前刚刚驶过的吵闹的南行汽车。
She slows down, slows terrifically down, going less than 20 miles per hour on the highway.
她放慢速度，慢得惊人，在高速公路上的时速还不到 20 英里。
And for a moment, I can see Dad is driving.
有那么一会儿，我看到爸爸正在开车。
I can see that the blood is drained from his face, too, making his eyebrows stand out a rich black on his pallid, deathly white forehead, a mask of someone pretending desperately that everything is A-OK, but doing it horrifically badly.
我可以看到他脸上的血色也消失了，使得他的眉毛在他苍白、死白的额头上显得格外突出，一副面具，拼命地假装一切都好，但做得却非常糟糕。
I see Dan in the passenger seat, holding onto the handrail above the door as a means to steady himself through this craziness, through this stupid, unnecessary risk.
我看到丹坐在乘客座位上，抓住门上方的扶手，以此来稳定自己，度过这种疯狂，度过这种愚蠢的、不必要的风险。
And he looks calm, collected, uncaring, like he isn't there.
他看起来平静、镇定、漠不关心，就像他不在那儿一样。
There are no cars ahead of them now.
现在他们前面已经没有车了。
The trailer is next in line.
拖车是下一个。
It slows to a crawl, and I could see Dad desperately trying to ignore the crazy, flashing, noisy Bonneville, rattling through the southbound lane, keeping his eyes fixed to the road, pretending like he isn't smuggling anything in the empty trailer behind him, this empty, useless trailer with the I beams all sealed up, with the two Mexican men driving it, with no obvious destination, no paperwork, no affiliation with any hauling or trucking company.
车子慢得像爬行一样，我可以看到爸爸拼命地试图忽略疯狂、闪烁、吵闹的邦纳维尔，他在南行车道上嘎嘎作响，眼睛盯着路，假装他没有在身后的空拖车里走私任何东西，这辆空的、无用的拖车，I梁全部密封，由两个墨西哥人驾驶，没有明显的目的地，没有文书工作，与任何拖运或货运公司没有任何关系。
No, sir, not trafficking in drugs.
不，先生，不是贩运毒品。
Just driving through, to Houston probably, looking for work.
刚刚开车经过，可能去休斯顿，找工作。
Oh, yes, we're American citizens.
哦，是的，我们是美国公民。
That's not why we're nervous.
这不是我们紧张的原因。
We could prove that.
我们可以证明这一点。
That's nothing.
那没什么。
We're nervous because of the pot we're hiding, and because we're only getting $2,000 for risking upwards of 10 years in prison.
我们很紧张，因为我们隐藏了底池，也因为我们冒着入狱 10 年以上的风险，只能得到 2,000 美元。
Isn't that funny?
这不是很有趣吗？
Isn't that just hysterical?
这不是歇斯底里吗？
But the skinny white guy is having lunch and can't be bothered.
但那个瘦瘦的白人正在吃午饭，无暇打扰。
In one of the weirder moments of this whole debacle, the Bonneville, the Airstream, and dad's tractor are all lined up like some cosmic event, and we see the skinny Border Patrol agent, with a white napkin tucked under his chin, and Dad's bloodless face up in the trailer through the window of the Airstream, as the agent waves him through with a fork, like he's conducting an orchestra.
在整个灾难中最奇怪的时刻之一，博纳维尔号、气流号和爸爸的拖拉机都像宇宙事件一样排成一排，我们看到瘦弱的边境巡逻队特工，下巴下塞着一张白色餐巾，透过气流车的窗户，爸爸毫无血色的脸朝上，当特工用叉子挥手让他通过时，就像他在指挥一个管弦乐队一样。
Go on through.
继续通过。
Go on through.
继续通过。
Mom continues driving south, stunned by what has just happened.
妈妈继续向南行驶，对刚刚发生的事情感到震惊。
And I'm careful not to say a word.
我小心翼翼地不说一句话。
We almost reach Raymondville and stop at a Whataburger to get a quick, wordless lunch, then spend some time sitting in a parking lot, waiting.
我们快要到达雷蒙德维尔了，在一家 Whataburger 店停下来，吃了一顿快速、无言的午餐，然后在停车场花了一些时间等待。
When she feels it is safe to return, she turns the car around and heads back north, back through the same checkpoint.
当她觉得可以安全返回时，她调转车头，向北行驶，穿过同一个检查站。
Are you sure this is safe, I ask.
我问，你确定这安全吗？
She doesn't answer.
她没有回答。
When we pull up again to the checkpoint, headed back to Hebbronville, around 3 o'clock, there was a different Border Patrol agent at the Airstream.
下午 3 点左右，当我们再次停在检查站，返回希布伦维尔时，气流处出现了另一名边境巡逻人员。
He is a small, clean cut militant Mexican with a Southern drawl.
他是个身材矮小的、干净利落、好战的墨西哥人，带着南方慢吞吞的口音。
Y'all American citizens, he demands instantly, leaning into the car through the window, clearly smelling for marijuana smoke.
“你们都是美国公民，”他立刻问道，同时从车窗探出身子，明显闻到了大麻烟味。
Oh, yes, says my mother, who is probably quite relieved the hard part is over, and it looks like we're getting away with it.
哦，是的，我母亲说，她可能很庆幸困难的部分已经过去了，而且看起来我们已经摆脱了困境。
How about you, son?
儿子，你呢？
You American citizen?
你是美国公民吗？
He gives me a direct glare through reflective sunglasses.
他透过反光太阳镜直视我。
There is nothing more potentially hostile than the indigenous ego interpreting the laws of his conquerer upon his own people.
没有什么比土著自我将征服者的法律解释给自己的人民更具有潜在的敌意了。
Yes, sir, I say, careful not to move or fidget or look away like I've learned.
是的，先生，我说，小心翼翼地不要移动，不要坐立不安，也不要把目光移开，就像我学到的那样。
He looks back at my mother, then at me, like he smells the nervousness of earlier.
他回头看了看我的母亲，然后又看了看我，仿佛闻到了之前的紧张气氛。
Something tugs at his intuition.
有什么东西拉扯着他的直觉。
Where are y'all headed, the sunglasses finally ask.
“你们要去哪里？”墨镜终于问道。
This catches Mom off guard.
这让妈妈措手不及。
Her subterfuge had ended when Dad had driven through the checkpoint.
当爸爸开车通过检查站时，她的诡计就结束了。
She left all her answers back in Raymondville.
她把所有的答案都留在了雷蒙德维尔。
We're going to Hebbronville, she says unconvincingly.
我们要去赫布伦维尔，她语气不那么令人信服。
Had he asked one more question, had he pressed it, we would have been in some sort of trouble.
如果他再问一个问题，如果他继续追问，我们就会遇到麻烦。
But he doesn't, and he backs off and motions us through.
但他没有，然后退后一步示意我们过去。
Mom drives the noisy car through Hebbronville, and we are about to hit the open highway again when we noticed Dad's trailer in the parking lot of a cheap motel by the side of the road.
妈妈开着那辆吵闹的汽车穿过希布伦维尔，我们正要再次驶上高速公路，这时我们注意到路边一家廉价汽车旅馆的停车场里停着爸爸的拖车。
My brother is lodged between the rearmost tires, working on the brake lights that ridiculously aren't working.
我的兄弟卡在最后面的轮胎之间，正在修理刹车灯，但可笑的是，刹车灯不工作。
Mom is as alarmed to find them there as I am.
妈妈和我一样惊慌地发现它们在那里。
This confirms my suspicion that there had been no planning beyond the consultation at the cúrandera's.
这证实了我的怀疑：除了库兰德拉的咨询之外，没有任何计划。
This whole debacle had been based on nothing more than $100 worth of faith.
整个灾难只不过是基于价值 100 美元的信念。
Mom pulls up next to the trailer, and I think she expects a victorious reunion.
妈妈把车停在拖车旁边，我想她期待着一次胜利的团聚。
When he sees her, Dad suddenly looks like he's about to punch her.
爸爸一看到她，突然一副要打她的样子。
Stupid [BLEEP] woman, he yells at her in Spanish.
愚蠢的女人，他用西班牙语对她大喊大叫。
Mom stops cold.
妈妈不再感冒了。
What the [BLEEP] were you thinking?
你在想什么[BLEEP]？
If they would have just turned around for a moment, it would all be over, and it would all be your fault, he spits at her in Spanish.
如果他们只是转身一会儿，一切就都结束了，这都是你的错，他用西班牙语朝她吐口水。
We realize what he's upset about-- the flashing headlights.
我们意识到他对闪烁的车头灯感到不安。
His words continue to snap and hiss around her like bullets in a firefight, and she follows him forward to the cab of the truck, kowtowing to her punishment.
他的话继续在她周围嘶嘶作响，就像交火中的子弹一样，她跟着他走到卡车驾驶室，向她的惩罚磕头。
Lucky for us, la Senora was right, Dad says, walking back with Mom, now excited and seemingly over his anger.
对我们来说幸运的是，拉夫人是对的，爸爸一边说，一边和妈妈一起走回来，现在他很兴奋，似乎已经克服了愤怒。
She made him blind, and we were let through like they were closed.
她让他失明了，而我们却被允许通过，就像他们关门了一样。
When we left them later that evening, Dan was doing the driving.
那天晚上晚些时候，当我们离开他们时，丹正在开车。
They pulled out of the parking lot and headed off to Houston and their payoff, the brake lights temporarily fixed in loops of black electrical tape.
他们驶出停车场，前往休斯顿，他们的回报是，刹车灯暂时固定在黑色电工胶带环上。
I watch as the truck disappears.
我看着卡车消失。
It looks like every other piece of now broken down equipment we've ever owned-- rusting, miserable, and totally criminal.
它看起来就像我们拥有过的所有其他现在已经损坏的设备一样——生锈、惨不忍睹，而且完全是犯罪行为。
Mom and I turn south back to Brownsville.
妈妈和我向南返回布朗斯维尔。
Mom is her usual quiet self, except this time, she plays the radio louder.
妈妈还是一如既往的安静，只是这一次，她把收音机开得更大声。
This means she's thinking.
这说明她正在思考。
It's getting dark, and I'm sleepy, so I sleep.
天快黑了，我困了，就睡觉了。
She'll get us home.
她会送我们回家。
She knows the way.
她认识路。
For that, I could trust her.
为此，我可以信任她。
Domingo Martinez reading a story from his collection, The Boy Kings of Texas, which is a memoir and a finalist for the National Book Award.
多明戈·马丁内斯正在阅读他的小说集《德克萨斯男孩国王》中的故事，该书是一本回忆录，也是国家图书奖的决赛入围作品。
Act Two: Get Away With It After the Beep Ira Glass Act Two, Get Away With It After the Beep.
第二幕：“哔”声后逃脱 Ira Glass 第二幕：“哔”声后逃脱。
So today's show is a rerun.
所以今天的节目是重播。
And a couple weeks before it originally was broadcast, we invited listeners to call into a special phone number that we set up here at the radio show and tell us what things you have gotten away with.
在节目最初播出前几周，我们邀请听众拨打我们在广播节目中设置的特殊电话号码，告诉我们您做了哪些事情。
Over 1,000 of you called.
超过 1,000 人打来电话。
Our intern back then, Tarek, listened to those messages, and he said that he came away from the experience seeing you all very, very differently than he had before.
当时我们的实习生塔里克（Tarek）听取了这些信息，他说，他看到你们所有人的经历与以前非常非常不同。
He said that if these messages are any indicator at all, most of you have either cheated in school or committed some small act of arson at some point in your lives.
他说，如果这些信息有任何迹象的话，那就是你们中的大多数人要么在学校作弊，要么在生活中的某个时刻犯下了一些小纵火行为。
So, good to know.
所以，很高兴知道。
I know we should try to capitalize on that during the pledge drive.
我知道我们应该在认捐活动中尝试利用这一点。
I have no idea how, but anyway, here's a small selection of the messages that we received.
我不知道怎么做，但无论如何，这是我们收到的一小部分消息。
We found new ways of cheating on tests, homework.
我们发现了考试、作业作弊的新方法。
We're not proud of it, or at least I'm not proud of it.
我们并不为此感到自豪，或者至少我不为此感到自豪。
But it's what we did.
但这就是我们所做的。
We learned Morse Code, would tap during class.
我们学了摩尔斯电码，上课时会敲击。
I, by all rights, should not have graduated.
无论如何，我不应该毕业。
And I shouldn't have gone to college, which is what wound up happening.
我不应该上大学，这就是最终发生的事情。
I got away with graduating high school by lying to my dean and telling her that I had HIV.
我向院长撒谎并告诉她我感染了艾滋病毒，从而逃脱了高中毕业的惩罚。
In my sophomore year of high school, I turned in a stick for my final project.
在我高中二年级的时候，我为我的期末项目交出了一根棍子。
And I'm embarrassed to tell you that I got away with a little bit of extortion.
我很尴尬地告诉你，我犯了一点勒索罪却逃脱了惩罚。
I suggested to him that if I could pass his class with a much better grade, that what I saw in the Super 8 would stay just between us.
我向他建议，如果我能以更好的成绩通过他的课程，那么我在 Super 8 中看到的一切就将留在我们之间。
Entering the church, we saw a giant earthworm on the ground in the parking lot.
进入教堂，我们看到停车场的地上有一条巨大的蚯蚓。
I picked it up and put it in my pocket.
我把它捡起来放进口袋里。
And before the service started, my brother and I were playing with it by ourselves.
在仪式开始之前，我和弟弟正在自己玩。
My brother dared me to put it in the hair of a girl in front of us, and I decided to do it.
我哥哥鼓励我把它放在我们面前一个女孩的头发上，我决定这么做。
And so I put it in her hair, but because her hair was so frizzy-- it was the '80s-- the worm disappeared, and she didn't feel anything.
于是我把它放进她的头发里，但因为她的头发太卷曲了——那是80年代——虫子就消失了，她没有任何感觉。
I got away with being the featured speaker in a seminar to which I was not even invited.
我在一次研讨会上成为了特邀演讲者，但我什至没有被邀请参加。
I'd like to tell you how I got away with posing as the president's cousin to get health care at a hospital in Tajikistan.
我想告诉你我是如何冒充总统的表弟去塔吉克斯坦的一家医院接受医疗服务的。
It's this incredible rush because it had worked.
这是令人难以置信的匆忙，因为它已经奏效了。
I was able to act my way out of being murdered.
我能够以自己的方式逃脱被谋杀的命运。
I was parked at a stoplight next to a girl I was trying to impress, and I decided to race her from stoplight to stoplight.
我把车停在一个红绿灯旁边，旁边是一个我想给她留下深刻印象的女孩，我决定和她赛跑，从一个红绿灯跑到另一个红绿灯。
So I slammed on the accelerator, and just as I was flying past her, a cop was going the other way.
于是我猛踩油门，正当我飞过她身边时，一名警察正朝相反的方向走去。
So he does a U-turn.
所以他掉头了。
I make a quick right down a side street, hoping he'll chase that girl, but of course, he didn't.
我沿着一条小街快速行驶，希望他能追那个女孩，但当然，他没有。
He came after me.
他来追我。
So I made another quick right up an alleyway.
于是我又沿着一条小巷快速行驶。
He was still coming after me, so I swooped in behind a garage, jumped out of my car, ran through some people's yards, crossed the main street of Sherman Avenue, and wondering what I'm going to do.
他还在追我，所以我突然冲进车库后面，跳下车，跑过一些人的院子，穿过谢尔曼大道的主街，想知道我要做什么。
I'm now without a car, and the police are looking for me.
我现在没有车，警察正在寻找我。
So I saw another cop car parked at a parking lot of the professional building, and I ran over and I said, oh my god, somebody just stole my car.
于是我看到另一辆警车停在专业大楼的停车场，我跑过去说，天哪，有人偷了我的车。
We thought it would be fun to try to make flamethrowers with WD-40 and a lighter.
我们认为尝试用 WD-40 和打火机制作火焰喷射器会很有趣。
I didn't want to tell them or anybody else because at the time, I was 19 and could get in trouble for arson.
我不想告诉他们或其他任何人，因为当时我 19 岁，可能会因为纵火而惹上麻烦。
So I kept that story to myself.
所以我把这个故事留给了自己。
I knew it was us because I went back to the spot where I had smoked that cigarette with a friend.
我知道是我们，因为我回到了我和朋友一起抽烟的地方。
And sure enough, that part of the ground was black.
果然，那部分地面是黑色的。
And then I was like, yep, that's definitely us.
然后我就想，是的，那肯定是我们。
I feel horrible about this now, but I ended up getting away with it.
我现在对此感到很糟糕，但我最终还是摆脱了它。
I kept it to myself, and it's the first time I'm revealing that secret.
我把这个秘密保密了，这是我第一次透露这个秘密。
I got away with it and spent the rest of the night just giggling and eating junk food like you do.
我侥幸逃脱了惩罚，整个晚上都像你一样咯咯笑，吃着垃圾食品。
OK, we have one final story from a listener-- kind of a long one.
好的，我们有一个听众的最后一个故事——有点长。
I went to an acting conservatory in New York City for two years, and they told me about a month before graduation that it wouldn't be happening for me.
我在纽约市的一所表演学院学习了两年，毕业前一个月他们告诉我，这不会发生在我身上。
I was, like, a credit and a half or two credits shy.
我大概只差一个学分、半个学分或两个学分。
And I was like, this is not a problem.
我当时想，这不是问题。
I figured I'd find a way to work it out.
我想我会找到一种方法来解决这个问题。
I actually think I thought I would Ferris Bueller it somehow and actually be able to get my diploma.
事实上，我认为我会以某种方式费里斯·布勒（Ferris Bueller），并且实际上能够获得我的文凭。
I just kept telling my parents everything was fine, and they made plans to come to New York and go to the graduation.
我只是一直告诉我的父母一切都很好，他们计划来纽约参加毕业典礼。
And they were going to make a whole weekend trip of the thing.
他们打算用整个周末的时间来旅行。
And they came to town, and I knew I was not going to be able to walk and my name was not going to be called, so I sort of just planted things in their mind all weekend.
他们来到城里，我知道我将无法行走，也不会被叫到我的名字，所以我整个周末都在他们的脑海里植入了一些东西。
Like, you know, I hear graduation's four hours long.
就像，你知道，我听说毕业典礼有四个小时。
I hear a lot of people aren't going and made sure they got extremely drunk the night before and would be hung over the next day.
我听说很多人不去，并确保他们前一天晚上喝得酩酊大醉，第二天就会被吊起来。
The graduation was at 1:00.
毕业典礼时间为下午 1:00。
We were all dressed up and ready to go.
我们都盛装打扮，准备出发。
I was like, you know what?
我当时想，你知道吗？
Let's just skip it.
我们就跳过它吧。
Let's have a good day in New York and go do something fun instead.
让我们在纽约度过美好的一天，然后去做一些有趣的事情吧。
So they bought it.
所以他们买了它。
And we just went out in New York, and I told my parents that I ended up getting a diploma in the mail to my apartment months later.
我们刚刚在纽约出去，我告诉我的父母，几个月后我最终收到了邮寄到我公寓的文凭。
And to this day, they still think I graduated from college when I didn't.
直到今天，他们仍然认为我大学毕业了，但其实我没有。
Interesting side note-- the only person I ever told that to in my family was my brother after he came out of the closet and told me he was gay.
有趣的是——在我的家里，我唯一告诉过的人是我的兄弟，他出柜后告诉我他是同性恋。
And I figured I'd tell him my big secret, too.
我想我也应该告诉他我的大秘密。
And he went right and told my sister because that way, if I ever outed him, he'd be able to say I was a huge liar.
他径直告诉了我姐姐，因为这样，如果我揭发他，他就会说我是个大骗子。
So there you go.
所以就这样吧。
Thanks to everybody who took the time to call.
感谢所有花时间打电话的人。
See you all in hell.
地狱见。
Well, coming up, 12-year-old ballerina con artist.
好吧，接下来是 12 岁的芭蕾舞演员骗子。
You know, I have one thing written here to make you want to listen to this story, but that should be enough, right?
你知道，我在这里写了一件事让你想听这个故事，但这应该足够了，对吧？
That is enough right there.
那里就足够了。
I'm just going to say it again-- 12-year-old ballerina con artist.
我只想再说一遍——12 岁的芭蕾舞演员骗子。
Come on.
快点。
You can't turn away without hearing that.
你不能在没有听到这句话的情况下转身走开。
That's coming up in just a minute, from Chicago Public Radio, when our program continues.
当我们的节目继续进行时，芝加哥公共广播电台将在一分钟后播出这一内容。
Act Three: Crime and Tutus Ira Glass It's This American Life.
第三幕：犯罪和图图斯·艾拉·格拉斯 这就是美国生活。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we choose a theme, bring you different kinds of stories on that theme.
当然，我们每周的节目都会选择一个主题，为您带来有关该主题的不同类型的故事。
Today's show, Getting Away With It.
今天的节目是《逃之夭夭》。
We have stories of people doing just that and usually, not feeling so bad about it.
我们有这样的故事，人们就是这样做的，而且通常不会对此感到那么难过。
We've arrived at Act Three of our program.
我们已经到了节目的第三幕了。
Act Three, Crime and Tutus.
第三幕，犯罪与芭蕾舞裙。
OK, parents, I would actually warn you not to let your kids hear this next story, except the thing that the children in this next story accomplish would be impossible for any kids to do today.
好吧，父母们，我实际上警告你们不要让你们的孩子听到下一个故事，除非下一个故事中的孩子们完成的事情是今天任何孩子都不可能做到的。
Basically, they go to the airport, and they try to hop on a plane to go to another city.
基本上，他们去机场，然后尝试跳上飞机去另一个城市。
The comedian Molly Shannon told what happened to Marc Maron on his podcast, WTF, which is a great podcast.
喜剧演员莫莉·香农 (Molly Shannon) 在他的播客 WTF 上讲述了马克·马龙 (Marc Maron) 的遭遇，这是一个很棒的播客。
They did this in front of a live audience in November 2011.
2011 年 11 月，他们在现场观众面前做到了这一点。
I hopped a plane when I was 12.
我12岁时就跳了飞机。
We told my dad-- me and my friend Anna were like, we're going to hop a plane to New York.
我们告诉我爸爸——我和我的朋友安娜说，我们要搭飞机去纽约。
And he was like-- he dared us.
他就像——他向我们挑战。
So we went to the--
所以我们去了——
How old were you?
你当时几岁？
Molly Shannon We were, like, 12.
莫莉·香农 (Molly Shannon) 我们当时大概 12 岁。
Oh, good.
哦，很好。
That's good.
那挺好的。
Molly Shannon So we went to the airport, and we had ballet outfits on.
莫莉·香农 (Molly Shannon) 所以我们去了机场，穿上了芭蕾舞服。
And we put our hair in buns, and we wanted to look really innocent.
我们把头发盘成发髻，我们想让自己看起来很天真。
And this was, again, when flying was really easy.
这又是飞行变得非常容易的时候。
You didn't need your ticket to get through.
您不需要门票即可通过。
And we told my dad, and we were just like, we saw there were two flights.
我们告诉我爸爸，我们就像，我们看到有两个航班。
We were either going to go to San Francisco or New York.
我们要么要去旧金山，要么去纽约。
And we thought, oh, let's go to New York.
我们想，哦，我们去纽约吧。
It's leaving early.
出发的时间还早呢
So we went.
所以我们就去了。
We said to the stewardess, we just want to say goodbye to my sister.
我们对空姐说，我们只是想和姐姐告别。
Could we go on the plane?
我们可以上飞机吗？
She was like, sure.
她说，当然。
And then she let us on, and it was a really empty flight because it was out of Cleveland, Ohio.
然后她让我们登机，这趟航班非常空，因为它是从俄亥俄州克利夫兰起飞的。
And we sat back there, and then all of a sudden, you just hear like, vroom.
我们坐回那儿，然后突然间，你听到了“嗯”的声音。
The plane takes off, and we were like-- and we had little ballet outfits and buns.
飞机起飞了，我们就像——我们穿着小芭蕾舞服和发髻。
And I was, like, hail Mary, full of grace.
我就像万岁玛丽一样，充满了恩典。
The Lord is with thee.
主与你同在。
Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
你在妇女中是有福的，你腹中的孩子也是有福的，耶稣。
Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.
圣母玛利亚，天主之母，请为我们现在和临终时的罪人祈祷。
Amen.
阿门。
And then the stewardess had given us permission to go say good bye to my sister came by to ask if we wanted snacks or beverages.
然后空姐允许我们去告别，我姐姐过来问我们是否想要零食或饮料。
And she was like, can I get you ladies something to eat?
她说，我能给你们女士们一些吃的吗？
She looked like she was like, oh, mother [BLEEP].
她看起来就像，哦，妈妈[BLEEP]。
So we wondered if we were going to get in trouble, but she ended up not telling anyone.
所以我们想知道我们是否会遇到麻烦，但她最终没有告诉任何人。
And then when we landed in New York City, she was like, bye, ladies.
然后当我们降落在纽约市时，她就像，再见，女士们。
Have a nice trip.
旅行愉快。
It's such an exciting story, but the irresponsibility of all the adults in this story is somehow undermining my appreciation of it.
这是一个如此令人兴奋的故事，但这个故事中所有成年人的不负责任在某种程度上破坏了我对它的欣赏。
You were 12-year-old girls in ballet outfits, and everybody's sort of like, have a good time.
你们是穿着芭蕾舞服装的 12 岁女孩，每个人都喜欢，玩得很开心。
What world was that?
那是什么世界？
What did you do in New York?
你在纽约做了什么？
Molly Shannon Well, again, because I had a crazy childhood, we call my dad.
莫莉·香农 嗯，再说一遍，因为我有一个疯狂的童年，所以我们叫我爸爸。
We were, like, we did it!
我们就像，我们做到了！
And he was like, oh, god!
他就像，哦，上帝！
Molly!
莫莉！
Oh, jeez, well, try to-- so basically, he couldn't--
哦，天啊，好吧，尝试——所以基本上，他不能——
Try to what?
尝试什么？
Molly Shannon He didn't know what to do.
莫莉·香农 他不知道该怎么办。
He said try to see if you could stay-- go find a hotel that you could stay in.
他说试着看看你是否可以留下来——去找一家你可以住的酒店。
Oh my god.
天哪。
Molly Shannon Me and Mary, my sister, will come meet you.
莫莉·香农 我和我的妹妹玛丽会来接你。
We'll drive there.
我们会开车去那里。
So basically, we were like, all right, we'll try to find a hotel.
所以基本上，我们想，好吧，我们会尽力找到一家酒店。
But he was kind of excited because he liked crazy stuff.
但他有点兴奋，因为他喜欢疯狂的东西。
But basically, we didn't have that much.
但基本上，我们没有那么多。
We just had our ballet bags and a little bit of cash that we went to a diner, and we dined and dashed.
我们带着芭蕾舞包和一点现金去了一家小餐馆，边吃边冲。
And we stole things.
我们偷了东西。
We were like little con artists.
我们就像小骗子。
Wait, did you actually make it to the city?
等等，你真的进城了吗？
We made it to the city.
我们到达了城市。
I was like, how do you get to Rockefeller Center?
我问，怎么去洛克菲勒中心？
Because I had just seen TV scenes--
因为我刚刚看过电视场景——
And nobody said, are you girls lost?
没有人说，你们女孩迷路了吗？
Nothing like that?
没有那样的事吗？
No, nothing.
不，没什么。
So we did try to go to hotels, and my dad would call and ask, could they just stay there until we get there?
所以我们确实尝试去酒店，我爸爸会打电话问，他们可以一直呆在那里直到我们到达那里吗？
And none of the hotels wanted to be responsible.
没有一家酒店愿意承担责任。
Oh my god.
我的天啊。
Molly Shannon So he was like, all right, you got to come home.
莫莉·香农（Molly Shannon）所以他说，好吧，你必须回家了。
And he was like, but I'm not paying for it, so try to hop on one on the way back.
他说，但我不付钱，所以试着在回来的路上跳上一辆。
So we tried to hop on many planes, but it was the flights were all so crowded.
所以我们尝试跳上很多架飞机，但航班都太拥挤了。
Right.
正确的。
Molly Shannon So we ended up having to have him pay for it, and he made us pay it all back with our babysitting money.
莫莉·香农（Molly Shannon）所以我们最终不得不让他付钱，他让我们用保姆费来偿还所有费用。
Yeah, that was-- there was no punishment.
是的，那就是——没有惩罚。
He loved that kind of stuff.
他喜欢那种东西。
Like I said, he was wild.
就像我说的，他很狂野。
He used to--
他曾经——
I love the sort of strange nostalgic excitement you have for this borderline child abuse.
我喜欢你对这种近乎虐待儿童的行为产生的那种奇怪的怀旧兴奋。
Molly Shannon talking to Marc Maron on the WTF podcast, which I recommend and which you can find on iTunes or through an internet search.
莫莉·香农 (Molly Shannon) 在 WTF 播客上与马克·马龙 (Marc Maron) 交谈，我推荐该播客，您可以在 iTunes 或通过互联网搜索找到该播客。
We spoke with the other girl in that story who has not talked with Molly Shannon in a while-- didn't know that she was telling that story publicly-- who confirmed all the crazy details in the story.
我们采访了故事中的另一个女孩，她已经有一段时间没有和莫莉·香农交谈了——不知道她正在公开讲述这个故事——她证实了故事中所有疯狂的细节。
She says they held hands and prayed while the plane took off.
她说，飞机起飞时，他们手牵手祈祷。
Act Four, Pre K-O.
第四幕，K-O 之前。
To understand this next story, which is definitely a story about getting away with it in a big, big way, I first need to give you some background about preschool.
为了理解下一个故事，这绝对是一个关于大肆逃脱惩罚的故事，我首先需要给你一些关于学前班的背景知识。
In recent years, there've been more and more studies showing that preschool is one of the best investments a country can make in children's education.
近年来，越来越多的研究表明，学前教育是一个国家可以对儿童教育进行的最佳投资之一。
Probably the most famous piece of research on this is an old one called the Perry Preschool Project.
这方面最著名的研究可能是一项名为“佩里学前班项目”的旧研究。
This study began in the 1960s.
这项研究始于 20 世纪 60 年代。
They took a bunch of poor kids from Ypsilanti, Michigan, put half of them into a preschool program and then the other half just led their normal lives.
他们从密歇根州伊普西兰蒂收了一群贫穷的孩子，让其中一半进入学前班，然后另一半就过着正常的生活。
And then after a year of that, both of those groups went back into the same public school system.
一年后，这两个群体又回到了同一个公立学校系统。
And then every so often, researchers would follow up with these kids to see how they were doing from the two groups.
然后，研究人员经常会跟踪这些孩子，看看他们在两组中的表现如何。
They're following them still even now, and the results have been amazing.
即使现在他们仍在关注他们，结果令人惊叹。
At age 27, the kids who got preschool were half as likely to have gotten arrested.
27 岁时，上学前班的孩子被捕的可能性只有一半。
They earned an average of 50% more per month.
他们每月的平均收入增加了 50%。
They were 50% more likely to have a savings account, 20% more likely to have a car.
他们拥有储蓄账户的可能性高出 50%，拥有汽车的可能性高出 20%。
Preschool kids got sick less often, were unemployed less often, sentenced to incarceration less often.
学龄前儿童生病的次数减少了，失业的次数减少了，被判入狱的次数也减少了。
Other studies show similar results, not just for poor kids, but for other kids, too.
其他研究也显示了类似的结果，不仅适用于贫困儿童，也适用于其他孩子。
They do better if they have preschool.
如果他们有学前班，他们会做得更好。
And the very first state to choose to make free, high quality preschool available to almost every four-year-old in the state and then actually delivered on that promise turns out to be a surprising one.
第一个选择为该州几乎每个四岁儿童提供免费、高质量学前教育的州，然后实际兑现了这一承诺，结果令人惊讶。
In fact, only a handful of states have joined it.
事实上，只有少数几个州加入了这一行列。
Alex Blumberg reports that the story of how the state came to lead the nation in preschool access is all about getting away with it.
亚历克斯·布隆伯格（Alex Blumberg）报道说，该州在学前教育入学方面领先全国的故事都是关于侥幸逃脱的。
Quick reminder before we start-- today's show is a rerun from a few years ago.
在我们开始之前快速提醒一下——今天的节目是几年前的重播。
Since we did this story, some details of Oklahoma's political landscape have changed.
自从我们报道这个故事以来，俄克拉荷马州政治格局的一些细节已经发生了变化。
Here's Alex.
这是亚历克斯。
The state is Oklahoma.
该州是俄克拉荷马州。
And to show you just how surprising that is, consider what happened to a guy named Ron Peters.
为了向您展示这是多么令人惊讶，请考虑一下发生在一个名叫罗恩彼得斯的人身上的事情。
Peters was a freshman legislator in the Oklahoma State House of Representatives, a Republican.
彼得斯是俄克拉荷马州众议院的新议员，共和党人。
One of his party leaders, a veteran legislator, came up to him one day and said, the governor, also a Republican, appointed this task force to look into the issue of early childhood education.
有一天，他的党内一位领导人、一位资深立法者找到他说，州长（也是共和党人）任命了这个特别工作组来调查幼儿教育问题。
They came up with some recommendations.
他们提出了一些建议。
The recommendations were put into this bill.
这些建议已纳入该法案。
The governor wants us to pass it.
州长希望我们通过它。
Will you be in charge of making that happen?
你会负责实现这一目标吗？
I mean, it was a pretty mundane bill to start out with.
我的意思是，一开始这是一个非常平凡的账单。
It set up a public-private partnership, set up a private foundation--
它建立了公私合作伙伴关系，设立了一个私人基金会——
Ron Peters said sure.
罗恩·彼得斯说当然可以。
The bill seemed easy to pass and pretty non-controversial.
该法案似乎很容易通过，而且没有争议。
There were no state funds involved.
没有涉及国家资金。
It was all private money.
都是私人资金。
The idea was simply to set up a nonprofit to publicize the value of early childhood education, so more parents would consider it.
这个想法只是为了建立一个非营利组织来宣传幼儿教育的价值，这样更多的家长就会考虑它。
So he introduced the bill on the House floor.
因此他在众议院提出了该法案。
I didn't really think anybody would debate it.
我真的不认为有人会争论它。
I mean, how do you debate-- just the private sector was going to raise money to fund the awareness program, so I mean, you couldn't argue about spending state money.
我的意思是，你如何辩论——只有私营部门才会筹集资金来资助意识计划，所以我的意思是，你不能争论花费国家资金。
But when they said will there be debate, about seven hands on my side of the aisle went up to debate against it.
但当他们说是否会进行辩论时，我这边的过道上大约有七名代表站起来反对。
This is a nanny state bill.
这是一项保姆州法案。
The government's going to come take our kids and raise them for us.
政府会来接我们的孩子并为我们抚养他们。
We think kids should be raised by their mom and dad.
我们认为孩子应该由爸爸妈妈抚养长大。
When I was elected, I thought I was Rush Limbaugh incarnate.
当我当选时，我以为我是拉什·林博的化身。
And then I got to the legislature, it was like, who the heck are those people way over there?
然后我到了立法机关，我就想，那边的人到底是谁？
So--
所以——
You didn't think there was anybody right of you, huh?
你不认为有人对你有理，是吗？
No. Oh, no. No, but there ended up the whole bunch of them.
不，哦，不。不，但最终还是有一大堆。
I got it passed.
我已经通过了。
And it passed the House, passed the Senate.
它通过了众议院，通过了参议院。
And then all the people started getting letters from the far-right wing, saying to the governor, this is a nanny state bill.
然后所有人都开始收到极右翼的来信，他们对州长说，这是一项保姆州法案。
Why don't we just take our kids from the hospital and take them to you to raise for us?
我们为什么不直接把孩子从医院接过来交给你抚养呢？
And he got scared a little bit, I guess, and he ended up vetoeing his own task force bill.
我猜他有点害怕，最后他否决了自己的特别工作组法案。
Wait a minute.
等一下。
Ron Peters Oh, I was terribly upset.
罗恩·彼得斯 哦，我非常沮丧。
Actually, the governor only threatened a veto, but it was enough to kill Peter's bill that time around.
事实上，州长只是威胁否决，但这一次就足以扼杀彼得的法案了。
And that is how unlikely it is to pass universal public preschool in Oklahoma.
这就是在俄克拉荷马州通过全民公立学前教育的可能性是多么的小。
A bill that simply suggests that the state might think it's a good idea for kids to go to preschool-- a bill, remember, that doesn't involve any state money and doesn't actually set up any new government programs-- that bill gets attacked as socialism and scuttled.
一项法案只是表明，国家可能认为孩子们上学前班是个好主意——记住，这项法案不涉及任何国家资金，实际上也没有设立任何新的政府项目——该法案遭到了社会主义的攻击，并被否决。
Oklahoma is arguably the most conservative state in the country.
俄克拉荷马州可以说是美国最保守的州。
It's got a Republican House, a Republican Senate, a Republican governor.
它有共和党众议院、共和党参议院和共和党州长。
Four out of its five representatives to Congress are Republicans, as are both its senators.
国会五名代表中有四名是共和党人，两位参议员也是如此。
One of those senators, Tom Coburn, was named the most conservative senator in Congress by National Review magazine.
其中一位参议员汤姆·科伯恩 (Tom Coburn) 被《国家评论》杂志评为国会中最保守的参议员。
And if you need more proof, consider this-- Oklahoma was the only state in the entire country in 2008 where not one single county voted for Barack Obama.
如果您需要更多证据，请考虑这一点 - 俄克拉荷马州是 2008 年全国唯一没有一个县投票支持巴拉克·奥巴马的州。
So how in the world did anyone get the conservative state of Oklahoma to agree to a dramatic expansion of the state's public education system in preschool, something that many conservatives would oppose?
那么，究竟如何才能让保守的俄克拉荷马州同意大幅扩展该州的学前公共教育系统，而这是许多保守派所反对的呢？
How did anyone get away with that?
怎么会有人逃脱惩罚呢？
The answer-- universal public preschool came to Oklahoma not as part of a bold evidence based campaign, it was snuck in, in the dark.
答案是——全民公立学前班来到俄克拉荷马州并不是一项大胆的基于证据的运动的一部分，而是在黑暗中悄悄出现的。
And to give you a sense of just how secretly it happened, consider this rather amazing fact.
为了让您了解这件事发生的秘密，请考虑一下这个相当惊人的事实。
At the time Ron Peters was getting his little bill squashed by his own party in the legislature, universal preschool was already in place in Oklahoma.
当罗恩·彼得斯（Ron Peters）在立法机构中被自己的政党压垮他的小法案时，俄克拉荷马州已经建立了全民学前班。
It had been voted into law three years earlier, voted into law by many of the same people who were accusing Ron Peters of socialism.
三年前，该法案已被投票成为法律，投票成为法律的正是许多指控罗恩·彼得斯社会主义的人。
And what's more, they had probably voted for that law without even realizing it, which is exactly the way that people who brought public preschool to Oklahoma wanted it.
更重要的是，他们可能在没有意识到的情况下投票支持了这项法律，而这正是将公立学前班带到俄克拉荷马州的人们所希望的方式。
The story begins in the late 1990s, and it begins with a seemingly unrelated issue.
故事从20世纪90年代末开始，从一个看似无关的问题开始。
School superintendents around Oklahoma had discovered a loophole in the state's school funding formula and were using that loophole to run a little scheme that involved kindergarten classes and huge amounts of money.
俄克拉荷马州各地的学校负责人发现了该州学校资助公式中的一个漏洞，并利用该漏洞实施了一项涉及幼儿园课程和巨额资金的小计划。
So the scheme was it was legal in Oklahoma for schools to have either a full day or a half-day kindergarten program.
因此，该计划是，在俄克拉荷马州，学校开设全日制或半日制幼儿园课程是合法的。
The loophole was that the schools got paid the same amount from the state either way.
漏洞在于，无论哪种方式，学校都从国家获得了相同的金额。
And so what school districts began doing was running two half-day programs and collecting twice as much money.
因此，学区开始做的是举办两个半天的项目并筹集两倍的资金。
And if they couldn't find enough five-year-olds to fill two kindergarten classes, they would pad their numbers with four-year-olds.
如果他们找不到足够的五岁孩子来填满两个幼儿园班级，他们就会用四岁孩子来填补人数。
We got right in the middle of that very, very early.
我们非常非常早地就进入了这个阶段。
Lloyd Snow was a school superintendent at this time who took advantage of this loophole-- ran two half-day kindergartens, enrolled a bunch of four-year-olds, and got paid double from the state.
劳埃德·斯诺（Lloyd Snow）当时是一名学校校长，他利用了这个漏洞——经营了两所半日制幼儿园，招收了一群四岁的孩子，并从国家获得双倍工资。
It was like a no-brainer to not only be able to do this, put it in play, and then have money left over for other so desperately needed underfunded educational processes.
这就像是一个简单的事情，不仅能够做到这一点，将其付诸实践，然后为其他急需的资金不足的教育过程留下资金。
I mean, it was a good thing, and we haven't had very many good things in public schools in my estimation.
我的意思是，这是一件好事，但据我估计，公立学校并没有发生太多好事。
So I didn't blink twice.
所以我没有眨眼两次。
All around the state, the scheme spread.
该计划在全州范围内蔓延开来。
Four-year-olds were like gold, and the extra money they brought in went to everything from football programs to new school equipment, even new buildings.
四岁的孩子就像黄金一样，他们带来的额外收入可以用于各种用途，从足球项目到新的学校设备，甚至新建筑。
That's what happened in the district of Joe Eddins, a state legislator around this time.
这就是当时州议员乔·埃丁斯 (Joe Eddins) 选区发生的事情。
There was so much money came with these children, the school district bought what we call portable classrooms-- a big mobile home that you clunk it together and you've got a nice classroom prefab here.
这些孩子带来了很多钱，学区买了我们所说的便携式教室——一个大的移动房屋，你把它拼凑在一起，你就在这里得到了一个漂亮的教室预制件。
They bought the buildings, paid cash for them with the money the first year.
他们购买了这些建筑物，并在第一年用这些钱支付了现金。
Yeah, I mean, it's that much gravy, and then from then on, they got to use the buildings, in essence, free.
是的，我的意思是，有那么多肉汁，然后从那时起，他们就可以免费使用这些建筑物。
That might sound like Joe was happy about this, but he wasn't.
听起来乔对此很高兴，但他并不高兴。
This seemed like a loophole that people were abusing.
这似乎是人们滥用的一个漏洞。
And so for two years, he tried to close it, to keep four-year-olds out of kindergarten.
因此，两年来，他试图关闭它，不让四岁的孩子进入幼儿园。
But he got nowhere.
但他一无所获。
And Joe Eddins, he becomes central to the story of universal preschool in Oklahoma.
乔·埃丁斯 (Joe Eddins) 成为俄克拉荷马州普及学前教育故事的核心。
You'll hear a lot more from him later after he meets this next guy, another main character in the saga, a guy named Bob Harbison.
稍后，在他遇到下一个人、传奇中的另一个主角、一个名叫鲍勃·哈比森的人后，你会听到更多关于他的消息。
Bob Harbison is a self-described corporate guy-- conservative suits, tortoiseshell glasses.
鲍勃·哈比森（Bob Harbison）自称是一位企业人士——穿着保守的西装，戴着玳瑁眼镜。
He was for many years a senior manager at TWA, and after that, an executive in the oil and gas industry.
他曾在环球航空担任多年高级经理，之后担任石油和天然气行业的高管。
He was also friends with people on the board of the Tulsa Chamber of Commerce.
他也是塔尔萨商会董事会成员的朋友。
And one day--
而有一天——
A banker friend of mine that was the incoming president of the Chamber brought me up.
我的一位银行家朋友，也就是即将上任的商会主席，把我带大了。
He said, I want to talk to you about a project we've been working on at the Chamber.
他说，我想和你谈谈我们在商会一直在进行的一个项目。
And he said that it started in 1990.
他说这要从1990年开始。
They had put together a little task force to evaluate workforce development issues because Tulsa was going through a pretty explosive growth period.
他们组建了一个小工作组来评估劳动力发展问题，因为塔尔萨正在经历一个相当爆炸性的增长时期。
The banker friend explained that local businesses in Tulsa had a problem.
这位银行家朋友解释说，塔尔萨当地的企业遇到了问题。
They were finding it harder and harder to hire employees with enough skills and abilities to do the job.
他们发现越来越难雇用具有足够技能和能力的员工来完成这项工作。
The Chamber had been looking into the reasons for this.
商会一直在调查此事的原因。
Was it colleges and universities not training people properly?
是高校没有正确培养人才吗？
High schools?
高中？
They kept working back to this notion of increasing numbers of children not being ready for school.
他们不断地思考越来越多的儿童没有做好上学的准备。
This banker friend handed Bob a cardboard box filled with research and reports on early childhood education and said, here, look this over and see what you think we should do.
这位银行家朋友递给鲍勃一个纸板箱，里面装满了有关幼儿教育的研究和报告，并说，在这里，看看这个，看看你认为我们应该做什么。
Working through this cardboard box of materials in a cubicle at the Chamber, they and the staff had accumulated literature on this subject.
他们和工作人员通过会议厅小隔间里的这个装有材料的纸板箱，积累了有关这一主题的文献。
And I became familiar with the Perry Preschool study.
我开始熟悉佩里幼儿园的研究。
And do you remember reading those studies, like, was that sort of an aha moment where you're reading these long-term effects of preschool?
你还记得读过这些研究吗？当你读到这些学前班的长期影响时，你是否感到恍然大悟？
Do you remember your mindset then as you were reading through?
您还记得您阅读时的心态吗？
Well, I tended to frame things in terms of my business experience.
嗯，我倾向于根据我的商业经验来构建事物。
It was just sort of automatic.
这只是一种自动的。
Harbison said he thought back to his career in the airline industry, where one of the worst things you can do is fly a plane with an empty seat.
哈比森说，他回想起自己在航空业的职业生涯，在航空业，最糟糕的事情之一就是驾驶空座的飞机。
But a kid who comes to kindergarten too far behind, statistically, that kid might never catch up.
但从统计数据来看，一个到幼儿园的孩子如果落后太多，他可能永远不会赶上。
He's occupying that seat in first, second, third grade, in middle school and high school.
他在一年级、二年级、三年级、初中和高中都占据着这个席位。
But the seat might as well be empty for all the good it's doing the kid sitting in it.
但座位也可能是空的，因为这对坐在里面的孩子有好处。
And also, he thought when you look at the statistics of what happens to a lot of at-risk kids when they get out of school, they end up costing the government a lot of money.
而且，他认为，当你查看许多高危儿童离开学校后所发生的情况的统计数据时，你会发现他们最终让政府损失了很多钱。
They end up incarcerated or on public assistance-- bad outcomes for them and for society.
他们最终被监禁或接受公共援助——这对他们和社会来说都是不好的结果。
I always thought about if there was a business or a group of businesses and they had agreed to pay for all the outcomes, they would be spending money on prevention.
我一直在想，如果有一家企业或一群企业同意为所有后果买单，他们就会把钱花在预防上。
This cardboard box made a big impression on Bob Harbison, who, in his quiet way, became something of a crusader for early childhood education, making the case for it to anyone who would listen, including, sometime in the late 1990s, Joe Eddins.
这个纸板箱给鲍勃·哈比森（Bob Harbison）留下了深刻的印象，他以一种安静的方式成为了幼儿教育的斗士，向任何愿意倾听的人证明了这一点，包括 20 世纪 90 年代末的乔·埃丁斯（Joe Eddins）。
Now, remember, Joe was this legislator.
现在，请记住，乔是这位立法者。
He had this bill trying to close that loophole and keep four-year-olds out of kindergarten.
他提出这项法案试图堵住这个漏洞，让四岁的孩子无法进入幼儿园。
Bob Harbison started making the case that we don't want fewer four-year-olds in public school-- we want more of them.
鲍勃·哈比森 (Bob Harbison) 开始论证，我们不希望公立学校的四岁孩子减少，而是希望增加。
Here's Joe.
这是乔。
Bob Harbison is-- well, you know how smooth Bob Harbison is, isn't he?
鲍勃·哈比森——好吧，你知道鲍勃·哈比森有多圆滑，不是吗？
You know what I mean?
你知道我的意思？
I never knew I was being lobbied, if I was being lobbied.
我从来不知道我正在被游说，如果我被游说的话。
I just thought, well, this Bob Harbison's telling me the things I need to know, which, incidentally, Bob Harbison was telling the truth.
我只是想，好吧，这个鲍勃·哈比森正在告诉我我需要知道的事情，顺便说一句，鲍勃·哈比森说的是实话。
But that was the key that Bob Harbison found me a willing pupil and taught me all I know about four-year-olds.
但这是鲍勃·哈比森（Bob Harbison）为我找到一个愿意的学生并教给我关于四岁孩子的所有知识的关键。
Over the course of several meetings, Bob shared with Joe the contents of that cardboard box-- all those studies and research projects demonstrating the importance of early childhood education.
在几次会议的过程中，鲍勃与乔分享了那个纸板箱的内容——所有这些研究和研究项目都证明了幼儿教育的重要性。
And Joe gradually decided that he needed to change his law and make it much bigger.
乔逐渐决定他需要改变他的法律并使其规模更大。
He would still eliminate that four-year-olds in kindergarten for cash scheme, sure.
当然，他仍然会取消幼儿园里的四岁孩子的现金计划。
No longer could schools pack their kindergartens with four-year-olds to get extra money from the state.
学校不能再把四岁的孩子挤进幼儿园来从国家获得额外的资金。
But alongside that, he would provide for an actual program for four-year-olds-- an entirely new grade fully paid for by the state-- public preschool.
但除此之外，他还将为四岁儿童提供一个实际的项目——一个完全由国家支付费用的全新年级——公立学前班。
And it turned out Oklahoma had a very good pilot preschool program with guidelines for choosing the appropriate curriculum and hiring qualified teachers.
事实证明，俄克拉荷马州有一个非常好的学前教育试点项目，其中包含选择适当课程和雇用合格教师的指导方针。
But this program only existed in a few districts because, according to Eddins, the state didn't provide enough money to pay for it.
但据埃丁斯称，该计划只存在于少数几个地区，因为州政府没有提供足够的资金来支付该计划。
Eddins estimates the state provided only a third of the money that was actually needed to run one of these programs.
埃丁斯估计，政府只提供了运行其中一个项目实际所需资金的三分之一。
Joe Eddins' plan was to take that pilot program and fully fund it, so that any district that wanted it could actually get paid enough to put it in place.
乔·埃丁斯的计划是采取该试点计划并为其提供全额资金，以便任何想要该计划的地区实际上都能获得足够的报酬来实施该计划。
Now there was only one problem with this plan.
现在这个计划只有一个问题。
There was probably no way it could pass-- no way the state legislature would ever agree to pay for a program like this.
它可能不可能通过——州立法机构不可能同意为这样的项目付费。
And so Joe Eddins essentially hid it.
所以乔·埃丁斯基本上隐藏了它。
He simply offered his amendment again, the one closing the four-year-olds in kindergarten for cash loophole, only with some new language.
他只是再次提出了他的修正案，即以现金漏洞为由关闭幼儿园四岁儿童的修正案，只是用了一些新的语言。
A kind of PS in which he proposed a tweak to the state's school funding formula-- made it so that schools got the same amount of funding for preschool that they got for other grades.
他在一份 PS 中提议对该州的学校资助公式进行调整，使学校为学前班获得的资金与其他年级获得的资金相同。
This was, in fact, a massive overhaul of Oklahoma's public school system, but the actual text of Eddins' amendment looked like nothing special.
事实上，这是对俄克拉荷马州公立学校系统的大规模改革，但埃丁斯修正案的实际文本看起来并没有什么特别的。
The way you amend a bill, the staff takes the sections of law that you're amending and then write your amendments in underlined and line out what you are deleting language.
修改法案的方式是，工作人员会取出您要修改的法律部分，然后用下划线写下您的修正案，并划出您要删除的语言。
And I just had a few words here and a few words there.
我只是这里说了几句话，那里也说了几句话。
Still, there were the traditional and powerful enemies to something like this-- budget hawks and limited government folks, which, as I said, Oklahoma might lead the nation in.
尽管如此，类似的事情仍然存在传统而强大的敌人——预算鹰派和有限的政府人员，正如我所说，俄克拉荷马州可能会领先全国。
Eddins' strategy here-- political sleight of hand.
埃丁斯的策略是——政治花招。
He drew their attention to the stuff in the bill he thought they would like and didn't mention the stuff they wouldn't.
他提请他们注意账单中他认为他们会喜欢的内容，而没有提及他们不会喜欢的内容。
I probably sat down at their desk with each Republican and showed them two or three things in the bill that I thought they ought to know.
我可能和每个共和党人坐在他们的办公桌前，向他们展示了法案中我认为他们应该知道的两三件事。
And what were those things?
那些东西是什么？
Joe Eddins Well, I showed them where we're keeping four-year-olds out of kindergarten, we're saving enormous amounts of money.
乔·埃丁斯：嗯，我向他们展示了我们如何让四岁的孩子不上幼儿园，我们节省了大量的钱。
You can contract with private providers, and they love that.
您可以与私人提供商签订合同，他们很喜欢这一点。
That's all I said.
我就说了这么多。
Now everything he said was true.
现在他说的一切都是真的。
Eddins' bill did allow state money to go to private daycare centers to teach preschool.
埃丁斯的法案确实允许国家资金流向私人日托中心来教授学前班。
Also, his plan was voluntary.
而且，他的计划是自愿的。
School districts didn't have to offer pre-K programs, and parents didn't have to send their kids to one.
学区不必提供学前班课程，家长也不必送孩子去学前班。
So it was entirely reasonable to expect that in the beginning, at least, not too many school districts would even take advantage of Eddins' tweak to the funding formula and offer a pre-K program.
因此，完全合理地预计，至少在一开始，不会有太多学区利用埃丁斯对资助公式的调整并提供学前班项目。
And one other thing Eddins had going for him, this four-year-olds in kindergarten for cash scheme, it was growing.
埃丁斯为他准备的另一件事是，这个四岁孩子在幼儿园的现金计划，它正在增长。
And it was feared that the two biggest districts in the state-- Oklahoma City and Tulsa-- were about to get in on it.
人们担心该州最大的两个地区——俄克拉荷马城和塔尔萨——也将参与进来。
Eddins says that compared to the sure financial Armageddon that would be, his bill was the cheaper alternative.
埃丁斯说，与肯定的金融世界末日相比，他的账单是更便宜的选择。
Everybody could see that my bill was way cheaper than not my bill.
每个人都可以看到我的账单比我的账单便宜得多。
If you voted no on my bill and killed it, you are going to have enormous enrollment of four-year-olds in kindergarten.
如果你们对我的法案投了反对票并否决了它，那么将会有大量的四岁儿童进入幼儿园。
And this was taking an immense amount of money.
这需要大量资金。
And all but one voted yes on the bill.
除一人外，所有人都对该法案投了赞成票。
Probably because in almost all his discussions with lawmakers about his bill, Eddins left out the main part.
可能是因为在与立法者就其法案进行的几乎所有讨论中，埃丁斯都遗漏了主要部分。
You know, the part about how he'd put the state on the hook to pay for an entirely new grade level.
你知道，关于他如何让州政府为全新的年级支付费用的部分。
He knew almost nobody in any legislature actually reads all the bills, and the number of people who actually understood Oklahoma's school funding formula you could probably count on one hand.
他知道在任何立法机构中几乎没有人真正阅读所有法案，而真正了解俄克拉荷马州学校资助公式的人数一只手就可以数得过来。
And his strategy worked.
他的策略奏效了。
It was a huge and costly expansion of the government's role in public education in a state more opposed to costly expansions of government than perhaps any other in the country.
这是政府在公共教育中的作用的一次巨大而昂贵的扩张，而这个州可能比该国其他任何州都更反对政府的昂贵扩张。
Steven Dow is the director of an anti-poverty agency and a longtime early childhood education advocate in Oklahoma.
史蒂文·道 (Steven Dow) 是俄克拉荷马州一家反贫困机构的主任，也是一名长期的幼儿教育倡导者。
He worked very closely with Joe Eddins to get this law written and passed.
他与乔·埃丁斯密切合作，起草并通过了这项法律。
I think it's fair to say that the number of people that understood what was going on in terms of the adjustment to the state aid formula, that most certainly you could count the number of people that were aware of that on one hand.
我认为可以公平地说，有多少人了解国家援助公式调整的情况，你肯定可以用一只手来数出有多少人知道这一点。
Now if there had been-- if everybody in the state was aware of it, would it have passed?
现在，如果有——如果该州的每个人都知道它，它会过去吗？
I don't know that I would say that I think it's likely that it would have passed.
我不知道我会说我认为它很可能会过去。
Basically, if you guys hadn't snuck this provision in--
基本上，如果你们没有把这个条款偷偷放进——
Right, I would say had the enactment of universal pre-K not been done through this what I would call stealth campaign, I think it's fair to say that it would not have been embraced.
是的，我想说的是，如果普及学前教育的制定不是通过我所说的隐形运动来完成的，我认为可以公平地说，它不会被接受。
The irony is now that the law is in place in Oklahoma, it just adds evidence to the case for preschool.
具有讽刺意味的是，现在俄克拉荷马州颁布了这项法律，它只是为学前教育的情况增加了证据。
Researchers who studied Tulsa's preschool kids say they enter kindergarten an average of five months ahead in math, seven months ahead in writing, and nine months ahead in reading.
研究塔尔萨学龄前儿童的研究人员表示，他们进入幼儿园的数学平均领先五个月，写作平均领先七个月，阅读平均领先九个月。
And the gains are even more pronounced for at-risk kids who get preschool.
对于接受学前教育的高危儿童来说，这种收益更为明显。
Lloyd Snow, the Oklahoma school superintendent, says he didn't need a study to show him that.
俄克拉荷马州学校校长劳埃德·斯诺 (Lloyd Snow) 表示，他不需要研究来证明这一点。
He could see it the very next year, after his district started offering preschool.
明年，他所在的学区开始提供学前班后，他就可以看到这一点。
I mean, one year after we started, I mean, we had to have department meetings and all kinds of stuff because our kids have better word recognition and letter recognition, better social skills, better hand-eye coordination skills, better-- just almost better everything, as it relates to readiness for school.
我的意思是，我们开始一年后，我的意思是，我们必须召开部门会议和各种各样的事情，因为我们的孩子有更好的单词识别和字母识别、更好的社交技能、更好的手眼协调能力、更好——几乎所有方面都更好，因为这与入学准备有关。
So now, we've got all of our kids from whatever background, I mean, they're voracious learners now.
所以现在，我们所有的孩子都来自任何背景，我的意思是，他们现在都是贪婪的学习者。
Don't start me with that stuff.
别用那些东西来开始我。
So--
所以——
I know my ABCs.
我知道我的 ABC。
I know-- Lloyd Snow Yeah, yeah, yeah.
我知道——劳埃德·斯诺 是的，是的，是的。
So that was kind of a game changer for us, and I think most schools.
所以这对我们来说是一种游戏规则改变者，我认为对大多数学校来说也是如此。
A game changer that, according to Joe Eddins, the legislator who arguably did more to change the game than anyone else, would not have been possible without the strange four-year-olds in kindergarten for cash scheme, the scheme that Eddins used as a smokescreen to sneak universal pre-K through a skeptical legislature.
乔·埃丁斯（Joe Eddins）可以说是为改变游戏规则做出了更多努力的立法者，他表示，如果没有幼儿园里奇怪的四岁儿童现金计划，这一改变是不可能实现的。埃丁斯利用该计划作为烟幕弹，让普遍的学前教育通过了持怀疑态度的立法机构。
I don't see it ever being funded if you had it like other states do, if you had to say, here's a program that we want to implement.
如果你像其他州那样拥有它，我不认为它会得到资助，如果你不得不说，这是我们想要实施的一个计划。
Here's how much money it'll take.
这是需要多少钱。
Woo, where are you going to get the money?
呜呜，你去哪里弄钱啊？
OK?
好的？
If you would have to have a line item of appropriation, nobody would have supported it, except the young mothers.
如果你必须有一个拨款项目，除了年轻的母亲之外，没有人会支持它。
And they have no political clout.
而且他们没有政治影响力。
What lessons could other states-- say, other states want to try to do something like this--
其他国家可以吸取什么教训——比如说，其他国家想要尝试做这样的事情——
They don't have a prayer.
他们没有祈祷。
They don't have a prayer.
他们没有祈祷。
Because it's expensive, and state legislatures are run by people that don't want to-- they want to cut programs, not add programs.
因为它很昂贵，而且州立法机构是由不想这样做的人管理的——他们想削减项目，而不是增加项目。
Not everyone would agree with Eddins on this.
并非所有人都同意埃丁斯的观点。
In fact, if you talk to experts, the trend around the country is for more and more kids to be enrolled in state-funded preschool programs.
事实上，如果你与专家交谈，就会发现全国各地的趋势是越来越多的孩子参加国家资助的学前教育项目。
States as diverse as Georgia, Iowa, Vermont, and West Virginia are all hard on the heels of Oklahoma, with preschool programs of their own.
佐治亚州、爱荷华州、佛蒙特州和西弗吉尼亚州等各州都紧随俄克拉荷马州之后，推出了自己的学前教育项目。
And as for Oklahoma, parents, says Lloyd Snow, the school superintendent, they love this program.
至于俄克拉荷马州，学校负责人劳埃德·斯诺 (Lloyd Snow) 表示，家长们非常喜欢这个项目。
And statistics across the state bear that out.
全州的统计数据证实了这一点。
Remember, parents don't have to send their kids to preschool.
请记住，父母不必送孩子去幼儿园。
It's voluntary.
这是自愿的。
But almost 75% of the state's four-year-olds are now enrolled in public preschool.
但该州近 75% 的四岁儿童现在就读于公立学前班。
However it arrived, it seems that universal pre-K is here to stay in Oklahoma.
不管它如何到来，通用学前班似乎将留在俄克拉荷马州。
Alex Blumberg, he's the founder of Gimlet Media and the host of the podcast, Without Fail.
Alex Blumberg，他是 Gimlet Media 的创始人，也是播客“Without Fail”的主持人。
We originally aired this story back when he was on our staff in 2012.
2012 年，当他还是我们的员工时，我们最初播出了这个故事。
Oklahoma's universal preschool program is still going strong.
俄克拉荷马州的普及学前教育计划仍然强劲。
[MUSIC - GENE CHANDLER, "I FOOLED YOU THIS TIME"]
[音乐 - 吉恩·钱德勒，“这次我愚弄了你”]
Our program was produced today by Nancy Updike and Robyn Semien with Alex Blumberg, Ben Calhoun, Sarah Koenig, Jonathan Menjivar, Lisa Pollak, Brian Reid, and Alissa Shipp.
今天我们的节目由 Nancy Updike 和 Robyn Semien 以及 Alex Blumberg、Ben Calhoun、Sarah Koenig、Jonathan Menjivar、Lisa Pollak、Brian Reid 和 Alissa Shipp 共同制作。
Senior producer for today's show is Julie Snyder.
今天节目的高级制片人是朱莉·斯奈德。
Additional production on the rerun of our show from Jessica Lussenhop, Katherine Rae Mondo, Stowe Nelson, and Matt Tierney.
杰西卡·卢森霍普、凯瑟琳·雷·蒙多、斯托·尼尔森和马特·蒂尔尼为我们的节目重播提供了额外的制作。
Special thanks today to Jim Nayder, Michelle Harris, Bianca Giaever, and Brendan McDonald.
今天特别感谢 Jim Nayder、Michelle Harris、Bianca Giaever 和 Brendan McDonald。
Our website, thisamericanlife.org.
我们的网站 thisamericanlife.org。
This American Life is delivered to public radio stations by PRX, the Public Radio Exchange.
《美国生活》由公共广播电台 PRX 向公共广播电台播出。
Thanks, as always, to our program's co-founder, Mr. Torey Malatia, who lists his personal vices this way-- he has five vices.
一如既往地感谢我们项目的联合创始人 Torey Malatia 先生，他以这种方式列出了他的个人恶习——他有五项恶习。
Five-- exactly five.
五——正好五。
Drugs, fruit, people, reptiles, and parrots.
毒品、水果、人、爬行动物和鹦鹉。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Back next week with more stories of This American Life.
下周我们将带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
[MUSIC - GENE CHANDLER, "I FOOLED YOU THIS TIME"]
[音乐 - 吉恩·钱德勒，“这次我欺骗了你”]
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。