347: Matchmakers - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #347 | January 9, 2009 347: Matchmakers Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 347 集 | 2009 年 1 月 9 日 347：媒人 注：《美国生活》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
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Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue Ira Glass From WBEZ Chicago, it's This American Life , distributed by Public Radio International.
序言 Ira Glass 来自 WBEZ 芝加哥，这就是美国生活，由国际公共广播电台发行。
And to explain the idea behind this week's radio show, I need to tell you about this date that one of the producers of our show, Jane Feltes, went on recently.
为了解释本周广播节目背后的想法，我需要告诉你我们节目的制作人之一简·费尔特斯最近进行的这个约会。
There was this guy who she talked to briefly after a rock show, and then the guy called Jane's friend Ray for her telephone number.
在一场摇滚演出后，她和一个人简短地交谈过，然后那个人给简的朋友雷打了电话号码。
And Ray is a really good friend of Jane's, and Jane says that Ray was all for this.
雷是简的好朋友，简说雷完全是为了这件事。
Ray saying things like, you really should date this guy.
雷说，你真的应该和这个家伙约会。
Like this is going to be great.
就像这样会很棒。
And he would use these arguments like, he went to BU.
他会使用这些论点，比如他去了波士顿大学。
I don't know what that-- is that Boston University?
我不知道那是什么——那是波士顿大学吗？
Yeah.
是的。
Jane Feltes Is that a good school?
Jane Feltes 那是所好学校吗？
I don't know.
我不知道。
Jane Feltes I don't know either.
简·费尔特斯 我也不知道。
He's like, he went to BU, he's friends with Joe Biden's nephew.
他就像，他去了波士顿大学，他是乔·拜登的侄子的朋友。
Right.
正确的。
Not Joe Biden.
不是乔·拜登。
Jane Feltes Or Joe Biden's nephew.
简·费尔特斯或乔·拜登的侄子。
Jane is recently single, so she figured, why not, might as well see what happens.
简最近单身，所以她想，为什么不呢，不妨看看会发生什么。
But comes the night of the date with a friend of the nephew of Joe Biden, and things start badly.
但到了与乔·拜登侄子的朋友约会的那天晚上，事情开始得很糟糕。
She's about to leave work to go meet him, and she gets a text message that he's going to be late.
她正准备下班去见他，却收到一条短信说他要迟到了。
About an hour later, she gets another one.
大约一个小时后，她又收到了一份。
She waits.
她等待着。
It had passed after, after-work drink time, and then it passed regular dinnertime to like, now, 10 o'clock.
已经过了下班后喝酒的时间，然后又过了正常的晚餐时间，现在，十点了。
And I thought, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt, because you never know.
我想，我会给他无罪推定，因为你永远不知道。
Maybe he would show up, and he would have like, a big shark bite or something.
也许他会出现，然后他就会被鲨鱼咬一口或者什么的。
Just to name one of the common reasons why people show up late for dates.
仅举出人们约会迟到的常见原因之一。
I don't know.
我不知道。
Well, that would-- I mean--
嗯，那会——我的意思是——
It would totally explain it.
这将完全解释它。
Jane Feltes It would explain a couple of hours.
简·费尔特斯：几个小时就能解释清楚。
When the guy finally arrives, he does not have a shark bite, but he is 100%, totally, completely stoned.
当那家伙最终到达时，他没有被鲨鱼咬伤，但他100%、完全、完全醉了。
They walk to a restaurant, where the guy does not try to be charming.
他们走到一家餐馆，那家伙并没有表现得迷人。
He does not really talk much at all.
他其实话不多。
And then he kept doing this thing, I think because he was so stoned, but I'm not sure.
然后他继续做这件事，我想是因为他太醉了，但我不确定。
But he kept doing this thing where I would be talking, and he kept like half closing his eyes, and then he would go-- he would like shake himself awake, an he'd be like, wait, sorry, what?
但他一直在我说话的地方做这件事，他一直半闭着眼睛，然后他会走——他想把自己摇醒，他会说，等等，抱歉，什么？
I just tuned out just then.
我当时就调出来了。
Over and over and over again.
一遍又一遍。
When the bill came, they each took out credit cards.
结账时，他们各自掏出了信用卡。
Jane figured they'd split this.
简认为他们会平摊这个。
But when he saw her card, he put his away and let her pay for the whole thing.
但当他看到她的卡时，他把卡收了起来，让她支付全部费用。
And then it was time to go.
然后是时候离开了。
The guy asked if Jane wanted to smoke another joint.
那家伙问简是否想再抽一根烟。
Jane pointed out that she hadn't been there for the first one.
简指出，她第一次来时并没有在那里。
So when you leave this date, what are your feelings about Ray, who set you up?
那么，当你离开这次约会时，你对陷害你的雷有什么感觉呢？
I mean, all kinds of stuff went through my head like, do you see me as so desperate?
我的意思是，各种各样的事情在我脑海中闪过，比如，你认为我如此绝望吗？
I mean, I'm really close with Ray.
我是说，我和雷的关系非常亲密。
He is one of my best friends.
他是我最好的朋友之一。
I couldn't see how he put the two of us together.
我不明白他是如何把我们两个放在一起的。
I couldn't see how he thought we would make a good match.
我不明白他怎么认为我们会很般配。
I started taking it personal like, oh, there must be something really wrong with me if one of my closest friend thinks this is the kind of guy I deserve.
我开始把它当作是针对我个人的，哦，如果我最亲密的朋友之一认为这是我应得的那种人，我一定有什么问题。
Well, you know, we should call your friend Ray.
好吧，你知道，我们应该给你的朋友雷打电话。
OK, I'll just summarize a little bit here of what happened next.
好吧，我就简单总结一下接下来发生的事情。
Ray was apologetic about how badly the date had gone.
雷对这次约会的糟糕程度表示歉意。
And he reminded Jane that he really didn't know that guy very well.
而且他提醒简然，他确实不太了解那个家伙。
And then we got to the big issue at hand.
然后我们就谈到了手头的大问题。
Jane has a question for you, and, if I can paraphrase the question, the question is, why did you think that he would be a good date for her?
简有一个问题要问你，如果我可以解释一下这个问题，问题是，为什么你认为他会是她的好约会对象？
The answer would be threefold.
答案有三个。
First, he was friends with Joe Biden's nephew, who is like a pretty good guy.
首先，他是乔·拜登的侄子的朋友，他是一个非常好的人。
OK, you don't even need to hear the other two reasons.
好吧，你甚至不需要听其他两个原因。
They made just as little sense as number one.
它们和第一条一样毫无意义。
But after talking for a while, Ray did finally explain the fix up this way.
不过聊了一会儿之后，雷终于是这样解释了修复的办法。
You always get the guy who's too rough.
你总是遇到一个太粗暴的人。
This guy seemed like-- since he had like a clean-cut haircut, and he was like a college guy-- He was kind of like friends with the bad guys.
这家伙看起来——因为他的发型很干净，而且他像个大学生——他有点像坏人的朋友。
So you could go out with the bad guy.
这样你就可以和坏人出去了。
He seemed like a normal guy too.
他看起来也像个正常人。
This is so crazy, because I had no idea you'd given it this much thought.
这太疯狂了，因为我不知道你会考虑这么多。
Up until this point, Jane had no idea that Ray saw her this way, or that he felt so strongly about who she dates that he might actually try to fix it.
直到此时，简还不知道雷是这样看她的，也不知道他对她约会的人有如此强烈的感觉，以至于他实际上可能会试图解决这个问题。
When you set up your friends you can't avoid revealing what you really think about them.
当你建立你的朋友时，你无法避免透露你对他们的真实想法。
Things you haven't even told them.
你甚至没有告诉他们的事情。
You're sticking your neck out more then they are when they go on the date.
当他们约会时，你比他们更愿意冒险。
And so we have for you today an entire show of people meddling, interfering, thinking they know what's best for others.
因此，今天我们为您呈现了一整套干涉、干扰、自以为知道什么对他人最有利的人的表演。
We've got Yentas, we've got busybodies, sometimes for good, sometimes for ill.
我们有Yentas，我们有好管闲事的人，有时是好事，有时是坏事。
Our show today-- Matchmakers.
我们今天的节目——媒人。
We have three stories in three acts.
我们有三幕三个故事。
Act one is a match done out of pure giddiness.
第一幕是一场纯粹出于眩晕而进行的比赛。
Act two is somebody who matches up people who, the most important thing they'll ever do together, they'll do the first time they meet.
第二幕是某人将人们配对，他们一起做的最重要的事情就是他们第一次见面时就会做的事情。
Act three is matchmaking between real children and plastic children.
第三幕是真实儿童和塑料儿童之间的配对。
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
Act One, a Good Year for Grand Gestures.
第一幕，大动作的好年景。
The matchmakers in this next story try to bring two people together who love each other.
下一个故事中的媒人试图将两个彼此相爱的人带到一起。
But there are different kinds of love, and different ways to think about love as they discover.
但他们发现，爱有不同的种类，也有不同的思考爱的方式。
Gregory Warner tells what happened.
格雷戈里·华纳讲述了发生的事情。
Once upon a time in Afghanistan, a tall, curly haired man named Mohammed Sabir saw a short young woman at his brother's wedding.
从前，在阿富汗，一个名叫穆罕默德·萨比尔的高个子卷发男子在他兄弟的婚礼上看到了一个矮小的年轻女子。
He never said a word to her, but he was smitten.
他没有对她说过一句话，但他却被她迷住了。
And normally.
正常情况下。
that would have been the end of the love story.
爱情故事就到此结束了。
In Afghanistan, men aren't allowed to talk with strange women.
在阿富汗，男人不准与陌生女人交谈。
But this one was different.
但这一次不同。
As the younger sister of his brother's new wife, she could visit Sabir's house with her parents.
作为他哥哥新婚妻子的妹妹，她可以和父母一起去萨比尔家。
Sabir could even manage to sit next to her on the couch, which he did three months later.
三个月后，萨比尔甚至可以坐在她旁边的沙发上。
Was that the first time you talked alone to a girl that wasn't your sister?
这是你第一次单独和一个不是你妹妹的女孩说话吗？
Yes, that is my first time.
是的，那是我第一次。
Gregory Warner Sabir speaks some English, but he brought along his friend Dr. Wasai to help translate the rest.
格雷戈里·沃纳·萨比尔会说一些英语，但他带着他的朋友瓦赛博士来帮助翻译其余的内容。
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE] It was very delicious time for me.
[说外语] 这对我来说是非常美好的时光。
Yeah, it was sweet and tasty, and his body also was shaking.
是啊，甜甜可口，他的身体也在颤抖。
And while he sat there shaking, Sabir told the girl she was very beautiful.
当他坐在那里浑身发抖时，萨比尔告诉那个女孩，她非常美丽。
The girl, whose name was Kotsea , told Sabir he had nice hair.
这个名叫 Kotsea 的女孩告诉萨比尔他的头发很漂亮。
If it was possible, I will take your hair on my head.
如果可以的话，我会把你的头发扎在我的头上。
She wanted to put your head on her head?
她想把你的头放在她头上？
What did that mean when she said that do you think?
当她这么说时，你认为这意味着什么？
All that flirting over the hair was racy enough by Afghan standards, but what happened next says Sabir, could have gotten him killed.
按照阿富汗的标准，所有这些在头发上的调情已经足够激烈了，但萨比尔说，接下来发生的事情可能会让他丧命。
He went over to his brother's house.
他去了他哥哥家。
And he found Kotsea alone in her bedroom.
他发现科特西独自待在卧室里。
And then, violating every rule he'd ever been taught, they kissed.
然后，他们亲吻了，这违反了他所学过的每一条规则。
After that one kiss, our love became the stronger and the stronger.
在那一吻之后，我们的爱变得越来越强烈。
The stronger their love got, the more secret they had to be.
他们的爱越强烈，他们就越需要保守秘密。
Sabir was then 28.
萨比尔当时28岁。
Kotsea was 18.
科特西 18 岁。
They'd steal looks over the dinner table.
他们会在餐桌上偷看。
Quick glances, Sabir says, like camera flashes.
萨比尔说，快速的扫视就像相机的闪光灯一样。
They decided to get married.
他们决定结婚。
I said for she, I love you.
我对她说，我爱你。
She says, I love you, you can marriage for me?
她说，我爱你，你可以为我结婚吗？
I said, OK, no problem.
我说，好吧，没问题。
I wait for you.
我等你。
She said, I'll wait for you?
她说，我等你好吗？
Dr. Wasai Yes, yes, she's wait for me.
Wasai 博士：是的，是的，她在等我。
Sabir needed about $10,000 to get married.
萨比尔结婚需要大约 10,000 美元。
$4,000 for her father for her hand in marriage, another $6,000 for the wedding itself.
4,000 美元给她父亲作为她的结婚费，另外 6,000 美元用于婚礼本身。
But Sabir doesn't make that kind of salary.
但萨比尔拿不到那样的薪水。
He's a driver for a Dutch development organization.
他是荷兰一家发展组织的司机。
He saves maybe $30 a month.
他每个月大约可以存下 30 美元。
At that rate, it would take three decades to raise what he'd need.
按照这个速度，需要三十年的时间才能筹集到他所需要的资金。
So each year, Kotsea would wait, and each year Sabir would tell her, he didn't have the money.
所以每年，科特西都会等待，每年萨比尔都会告诉她，他没有钱。
Four years passed.
四年过去了。
And then something happened which should have had nothing to do with either of them.
然后发生了一些本应与他们无关的事情。
Sabir's boss, Nikaj van Wees, went to a party at the Dutch embassy.
萨比尔的老板 Nikaj van Wees 去荷兰大使馆参加了一个聚会。
There Nikaj met an American aid worker, and he fell in love with her.
在那里，尼卡杰遇到了一位美国援助人员，并爱上了她。
Her name was Miriam.
她的名字叫米丽娅姆。
Before that, Nikaj had a pretty regular work relationship with his driver, Sabir.
在此之前，尼卡杰与他的司机萨比尔有着非常稳定的工作关系。
They didn't talk about personal stuff.
他们没有谈论私人事情。
But when Miriam moved in with Nikaj the mood changed.
但当米里亚姆搬去和尼卡伊同住后，她的心情就发生了变化。
Miriam talked to Sabir as a friend.
米里亚姆以朋友的身份与萨比尔交谈。
I was in the car with Sabir, and I asked Sabir, so are you married?
我和萨比尔在车里，我问萨比尔，你结婚了吗？
Do you have a wife?
你有妻子吗？
Do you have kids?
你有孩子吗？
He says, oh no, sir.
他说，哦不，先生。
He calls me sir.
他叫我先生。
Oh no, sir.
哦不，先生。
This is Miriam.
这是米丽亚姆。
She is sitting at the dinner table next to Nikaj.
她坐在餐桌旁，旁边是 Nikaj。
And so is there a girl?
那么有一个女孩吗？
Is there a girl?
有女孩吗？
Oh yes, sir.
哦，是的，先生。
Do you love her?
你爱她吗？
Oh yes, sir.
哦，是的，先生。
He's brownish, but he got a very red head.
他是棕色的，但他的头很红。
He can blush.
他会脸红。
He is the only Afghan I've ever seen who can turn beet red.
他是我见过的唯一一个能把甜菜变成红色的阿富汗人。
And I said, are you going to marry her?
我说，你要娶她吗？
Oh no, sir.
哦不，先生。
I don't have money, sir.
我没有钱，先生。
Here's how it usually works when a man can't afford the dowry to get married.
当一个男人买不起结婚嫁妆时，通常是这样的。
He waits for his sister to get engaged, and then he uses the money she gets for her dowry to pay for his new wife.
他等待妹妹订婚，然后用她的嫁妆钱来支付他的新婚妻子。
It's like a dowry recycling.
这就像嫁妆回收。
But Miriam found out that Sabir's father broke that tradition.
但米里亚姆发现萨比尔的父亲打破了这一传统。
Because his father doesn't believe in selling his daughters.
因为他的父亲不相信卖掉他的女儿。
So the fact that Sabir's father never charged a dowry for his daughters means that Sabir doesn't have any cash to pay for his own dowry.
因此，萨比尔的父亲从未为他的女儿收取嫁妆，这意味着萨比尔没有任何现金来支付自己的嫁妆。
And that seemed particularly tragic to Miriam and Nikaj, who were just beginning a fairy tale story of there own.
对于米里亚姆和尼卡来说，这似乎尤其悲惨，他们刚刚开始了自己的童话故事。
Before they met, both of them were in unhappy relationships.
在他们认识之前，两人的关系并不幸福。
The last place they expected to find their soulmate was Afghanistan.
他们最不希望找到灵魂伴侣的地方是阿富汗。
But Miriam had only been in the country a week when she met Nikaj.
但米里亚姆刚到这个国家一周就遇到了尼卡吉。
And a few weeks after their first kiss, she was flying back to America to divorce her husband.
他们初吻几周后，她飞回美国与丈夫离婚。
Nikaj flew to Holland to break up with his long-term girlfriend.
尼卡伊飞往荷兰与交往多年的女友分手。
It wasn't just love, it was that giddy, you won't believe what I found, stage of love, when you think things like, gosh, wouldn't the world be perfect if everybody could find this?
这不仅仅是爱情，它是那么令人眼花缭乱，你不会相信我发现了什么，爱情的阶段，当你想到这样的事情时，天哪，如果每个人都能找到这个世界不是完美的吗？
It's when lovers are at their most dangerous and prone to set you up with their friends.
这是恋人最危险、最容易陷害你和他们的朋友的时候。
As Miriam planned her wedding with Nikaj, she was bugged by Sabir's story.
当米里亚姆计划与尼卡吉举行婚礼时，萨比尔的故事让她心烦意乱。
I wanted to give them something.
我想给他们一些东西。
A heart gift my mom calls it.
我妈妈称之为心形礼物。
I wanted to give them something that meant something to me that was more than a token.
我想给他们一些对我来说意义重大的东西，而不仅仅是象征性的东西。
And so Nikaj and I chewed on this for a while.
于是我和 Nikaj 就这个问题思考了一段时间。
And that, along with the fact that we didn't want any gifts, gave us an idea.
加上我们不想要任何礼物这一事实，给了我们一个想法。
So we had the idea of passing the hat around, so to speak.
所以我们就有了将帽子传递出去的想法，可以这么说。
Instead of gifts, they could donate to the Sabir wedding fund.
他们可以向萨比尔婚礼基金捐款，而不是礼物。
If we marry, he marry.
如果我们结婚，他就结婚。
Miriam Van Wees If we get married, he gets married.
米里亚姆·范·韦斯 如果我们结婚，他也会结婚。
But their friends are all aid workers, and they don't have much money to give.
但他们的朋友都是援助人员，他们没有多少钱可以捐。
So it fell to Miriam and Nikaj to scrape together the money Sabir needed.
因此，米丽娅姆和尼卡杰就得负责筹集萨比尔所需的资金。
But in giving $10,000 to an Afghan that you met six months before, Miriam was breaking one of the basic rules of development work.
但是，米里亚姆向六个月前认识的阿富汗人捐赠 10,000 美元，违反了开发工作的一项基本规则。
In all her years in the business, she'd never given away even $100 to someone.
在她从业的这些年里，她从来没有给过别人哪怕是 100 美元。
One of her jobs is to certify new aid workers.
她的工作之一是对新的援助人员进行认证。
That includes teaching them not to fork over their own cash, because you don't want people to always be turning to you to fix their problems.
这包括教导他们不要自己掏钱，因为你不希望人们总是求助于你来解决他们的问题。
If one of my staff, if an ex-pat came up to me and said, yeah, I'm giving $10,000 to this family, because I really like them, I'd say, are you nuts?
如果我的一名员工，如果一位外籍人士走过来对我说，是的，我要给这个家庭 10,000 美元，因为我真的很喜欢他们，我会说，你疯了吗？
I would have said, you're crazy.
我会说，你疯了。
Because I don't give money to beggars, not usually.
因为我不会给乞丐钱，通常不会。
I believe in the bigger plan, funding hospitals, and orphanages, and education centers.
我相信更大的计划，为医院、孤儿院和教育中心提供资金。
You don't just give money away.
你不只是把钱捐出去。
That's just not what you do.
那不是你所做的。
So don't mess with the system.
所以不要搞乱系统。
Yeah, you don't want to set that precedent of I give, you receive.
是的，你不想开创“我给予，你接受”的先例。
And so that's, I guess, in some ways, how this broke my personal rule.
所以，我想，这在某种程度上违反了我的个人规则。
But Sabir also broke the rules, she said, because he was the one who chose Kotsea.
但萨比尔也违反了规则，她说，因为他是选择科特西的人。
It wasn't a match made by his family, as almost all marriages in Afghanistan are.
这不是他的家人撮合的婚姻，而阿富汗几乎所有的婚姻都是如此。
That appealed to Miriam.
这对米丽亚姆很有吸引力。
It felt like true love.
感觉就像是真爱。
He doesn't want any girl.
他不想要任何女孩。
He's really fixed on this one, not anybody, this one.
他真的专注于这个，而不是任何人，这个。
And I think that's what originally drew us to him.
我认为这就是他最初吸引我们的原因。
That's unusual in Afghanistan.
这在阿富汗是不寻常的。
And I liked that.
我喜欢这样。
I don't know.
我不知道。
It felt like a good year for grand gestures.
这感觉像是一个大动作的好年头。
We were really excited about life in general, and we felt like spreading it out.
总的来说，我们对生活感到非常兴奋，我们想把它传播出去。
And Sabir seemed to be the best direction to put it in.
而萨比尔似乎是最好的投入方向。
So Miriam and Nikaj put $2,500 in an envelope, a sort of down payment on the girl, Kotsea, .
于是，Miriam 和 Nikaj 在一个信封里放了 2,500 美元，相当于给 Kotsea 女孩的首付。
And they gave the envelope to Dr. Wasai, Sabir's friend, who also works for Nikaj.
他们把信封交给了萨比尔的朋友瓦赛博士，他也在尼卡杰工作。
And Dr. Wasai took the money to Sabir's house, and he sat down with Sabir's family to arrange everything.
而瓦赛博士则拿着钱来到了萨比尔的家里，他和萨比尔的家人坐下来安排了一切。
And that's when he found out they hated the idea.
就在那时他发现他们讨厌这个主意。
They ask me, his father and his sisters, they asked me, please talk with Sabir.
他们问我，他的父亲和他的姐妹，他们问我，请与萨比尔谈谈。
We are not happy with that girl.
我们对那个女孩不满意。
Turned out Sabir's family knew all about the secret fling.
原来萨比尔的家人知道这桩秘密的风流韵事。
They'd suffered for years the googly eyes, the flash of the camera looks at the dinner table, and they thought Kotsea was a terrible match for Sabir.
多年来，他们一直忍受着瞪大眼睛、镜头的闪光灯看着餐桌的痛苦，他们认为科特西和萨比尔很不配。
They didn't worry as long as Sabir didn't have the cash, but now he had foreign backers, international money from Nikaj and Miriam.
只要萨比尔没有现金，他们就不担心，但现在他有了外国支持者，来自尼卡吉和米里亚姆的国际资金。
The family marshaled against intruders.
一家人联合起来抵抗入侵者。
Even Wasai told Sabir to drop the girl.
甚至瓦塞也告诉萨比尔放弃这个女孩。
She was too short, he said.
她太矮了，他说。
I told him, reject her, and dump the agreement with her, because Miriam and Nikaj, they are the same tall.
我告诉他，拒绝她，并放弃与她的协议，因为米里亚姆和尼卡吉，他们一样高。
Yes, and Me and my wife, we are the same tall.
是的，还有我和我的妻子，我们一样高。
And when you're touching with your wife, all the parts of your body will be separate from each other.
当你和你的妻子接触时，你身体的所有部分都会彼此分离。
Sabir is sitting next to Wasai on the couch.
萨比尔坐在瓦塞旁边的沙发上。
Not laughing, just looking down at his hands, giving me a full view of his thick, fluffy hair.
没有笑，只是低头看着他的双手，让我清楚地看到他浓密蓬松的头发。
In the end, it didn't matter how tall Kotsea was, her father said no to the marriage.
最终，无论科特西有多高，她的父亲都拒绝了这桩婚姻。
Sabir was just a driver, he said, with a rented house.
萨比尔只是一名司机，他说，有一间租来的房子。
He wanted a better provider for his daughter.
他希望为他的女儿找到一个更好的养育者。
And so it was over.
一切就这样结束了。
Sabir was heartbroken, still single.
萨比尔伤心欲绝，仍然单身。
And Miriam and Nikaj were left wondering what would happen to their $2,500.
Miriam 和 Nikaj 不知道他们的 2,500 美元会怎样。
Two months passed.
两个月过去了。
and then I met again with Sabir and Dr. Wasai.
然后我再次见到了萨比尔和瓦赛博士。
And Sabir told me this.
萨比尔告诉了我这一点。
Sabir had a new fiancee.
萨比尔有了一个新的未婚妻。
Dr. Wasai She is a very good, beautiful girl.
Dr. Wasai 她是一个非常优秀、美丽的女孩。
I like her.
我喜欢她。
The new girl's 22, he tells me, just like Kotsea is.
他告诉我，新来的女孩 22 岁，就像 Kotsea 一样。
But this one was chosen by Sabir's sister.
但这是萨比尔的妹妹选择的。
She's Sabir's nephew's high school classmate, and everything else was done in accordance with tradition.
她是萨比尔侄子的高中同学，其他一切都按照传统进行。
Sabir met the girl's father, the father gave Sabir a bag of candy, Sabir gave the dad some of Miriam and Nikaj's money.
萨比尔见到了女孩的父亲，父亲给了萨比尔一袋糖果，萨比尔给了爸爸一些米里亚姆和尼卡的钱。
She is taller than the first one.
她比第一个高。
She has nice hairs.
她有一头漂亮的头发。
I know for they showed to me her photo.
我知道，因为他们给我看了她的照片。
You've never seen her?
你从没见过她吗？
You've only seen her photo?
你只看过她的照片吗？
Sabir hadn't even seen the new girl, which made this a very different kind of love story.
萨比尔甚至没有见过这个新女孩，这使得这是一个非常不同的爱情故事。
No secret kisses, no stolen glances, no tortured tale of young love.
没有秘密的亲吻，没有偷看的目光，没有年轻爱情的痛苦故事。
It felt about as romantic as a mail order catalog.
感觉就像邮购目录一样浪漫。
And Sabir sounded so practical.
萨比尔听起来很实用。
Yeah, now that she's my wife.
是的，现在她是我的妻子了。
I love her.
我爱她。
You do love her?
你真的爱她吗？
Dr. Wasai Yeah, yeah, because she is now my wife.
Wasai 博士 是的，是的，因为她现在是我的妻子。
I won't play you tape where I kept asking Sabir to compare the new girl to the old one.
我不会给你播放我一直要求萨比尔将新女孩与旧女孩进行比较的磁带。
He got uncomfortable.
他感到不舒服。
I felt like a spoil-sport.
我感觉自己就像是一个败家子。
And finally, Wasai told me to drop it.
最后，瓦塞让我放弃它。
Look, he said, Sabir's 32 years old.
他说，你看，萨比尔已经 32 岁了。
He's never talked to any other women, let alone been in a relationship with somebody.
他从来没有和任何其他女人说过话，更不用说和别人发生过关系。
Sabir thinks he was in love, Wasai says, but it was something else.
瓦赛说，萨比尔认为他恋爱了，但事实却是另一回事。
Pseudo love.
伪爱。
Pseudo love.
伪爱。
Gregory Warner A pseudo love?
格雷戈里·华纳 虚假的爱情？
Well, we would call it lust, I think.
好吧，我想我们会称之为欲望。
It means, the young boy get a little bit thirsty, especially in Afghanistan.
这意味着，这个小男孩有点口渴，尤其是在阿富汗。
Wait, the boy is very thirsty, you said?
等等，你说这男孩很渴？
Yes, and for example, when you drink some things more and more, you are not thirsty.
是的，例如，当你喝一些东西越来越多时，你就不渴了。
In European countries or in your country, it's very easy to talk with a girl.
在欧洲国家或在您的国家，与女孩交谈是很容易的。
In Afghanistan, maybe 90% of love is wrong love.
在阿富汗，也许90%的爱情都是错误的爱情。
Nobody took Sabir's love very seriously, not his family, not Dr. Wasai, not even, apparently, Sabir himself.
没有人认真对待萨比尔的爱，他的家人没有，瓦赛医生没有，甚至显然萨比尔本人也没有。
The only ones left to believe the love story were Miriam and Nikaj.
唯一相信这个爱情故事的人是米里亚姆和尼卡吉。
Four months had passed since I'd last seen them.
距离我上次见到他们已经过去四个月了。
Nikaj had changed jobs, they'd lost touch with Sabir.
尼卡杰换了工作，他们与萨比尔失去了联系。
They knew they were paying for a new wedding, but they didn't know the full story.
他们知道自己正在为一场新婚礼付钱，但他们不知道整个故事。
So I sat them down on the couch.
于是我让他们坐在沙发上。
I have good news and bad news.
我有好消息和坏消息。
The good news is Sabir is getting married.
好消息是萨比尔要结婚了。
Miriam was eight months pregnant, balancing a cup of green tea on her stomach.
米里亚姆怀孕八个月了，她的肚子上放着一杯绿茶。
I told her about the new fiance, and she looked so disappointed.
我告诉她新未婚夫的事，她看起来很失望。
Sabir hasn't seen her.
萨比尔还没有见过她。
Miriam Van Wees It's a crap shoot.
米里亚姆·范·威斯 (Miriam Van Wees) 这是一次糟糕的拍摄。
That's not fair.
这不公平。
He's going to be happy.
他会很高兴的。
His sisters checked the girl out.
他的姐妹们检查了那个女孩。
They talked with her mom, and they liked her, and thinks they are a match.
他们和她妈妈谈过，他们喜欢她，并认为他们很般配。
But that's the problem, is that Sabir is a romantic guy.
但这就是问题所在，萨比尔是一个浪漫的人。
I think he has high expectations.
我认为他有很高的期望。
If he were Mr. Joe Schmo, who didn't cry when he told a story or get the bad case of giggles, it wouldn't really matter if she wasn't the love of his life, because he's just another guy marrying another arranged girl and with no expectations.
如果他是乔·施莫先生，讲故事时不哭，也不咯咯地笑，那么她是否不是他一生的挚爱也没关系，因为他只是另一个男人，娶了另一个包办的女孩，没有任何期望。
But that's not Sabir.
但这不是萨比尔。
Sabir is a sensitive kind of guy.
萨比尔是一个敏感的人。
And I think he expects to be happily ever after.
我想他希望从此过上幸福的生活。
And what if he's not?
如果他不是呢？
The way Miriam had seen it, Sabir was a man who had glimpsed the promised land, the promise was true love.
在米丽亚姆看来，萨比尔是一个瞥见了应许之地的人，这个应许就是真爱。
And she just wanted to help him get there.
她只是想帮助他到达那里。
But now she has to face the fact that he was fine with an arranged marriage-- not just fine, happy.
但现在她必须面对这样一个事实：他对包办婚姻感到满意——不仅仅是满意，而是幸福。
And by the end of our conversation, Miriam decided she was happy with whatever made Sabir happy.
在我们的谈话结束时，米里亚姆决定她对让萨比尔开心的事情感到满意。
I wanted him to see something he liked, go after it, and have it be his.
我想让他看到他喜欢的东西，去追求它，然后让它成为他的。
Exactly, that's exactly the point.
没错，这就是重点。
He and she found what they wanted, and it was an usual, out of the ordinary way of doing, and they did it.
他和她找到了他们想要的东西，这是一种平常的、不寻常的做法，他们做到了。
They would have done it, if he had married that girl.
如果他娶了那个女孩，他们就会这么做。
But instead, they just went back to the status quo.
但相反，他们只是回到了现状。
And that's not really what we're looking for.
这并不是我们真正想要的。
We weren't looking to fund an arranged marriage.
我们并不打算资助包办婚姻。
We were looking to fund two people who fell in love.
我们希望资助两个相爱的人。
Well, just to make Sabir happy as well.
好吧，只是为了让萨比尔也开心。
And he needs a wife.
他需要一个妻子。
We thought giving him Benjamin Franklins would make everything OK.
我们认为给他本杰明·富兰克林会让一切顺利。
And it wasn't just that, it was a little bit more complex.
事情不仅如此，还有些复杂。
Sounds like a development project.
听起来像是一个开发项目。
Sabir says he's not planning to tell the new wife where their wedding money came from, at least, not till well afterwards.
萨比尔说，他不打算告诉新婚妻子他们的结婚钱从哪里来，至少要等到很久之后。
For now, he doesn't want her to know that he's doing anything different from the way things are always done.
现在，他不想让她知道他正在做任何与以往不同的事情。
Gregory Warner in Afghanistan, since we first aired this story last January, Sabir has gotten married in that arranged marriage, and says that he is a very happy man.
阿富汗的格雷戈里·华纳（Gregory Warner），自从我们去年一月首次播出这个故事以来，萨比尔已经通过包办婚姻结婚了，他说他是一个非常幸福的人。
Coming up, fake babies, a fake nurse, and a bet that nobody wants to win.
接下来，假婴儿、假护士，以及一场没人想赢的赌注。
That's in a minute, from Chicago Public Radio and Public Radio International, when our program continues.
稍后，芝加哥公共广播电台和国际公共广播电台将继续我们的节目。
It's This American Life , I'm Ira Glass.
这就是美国生活，我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we choose a theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
当然，每周我们的节目都会选择一个主题，为您带来有关该主题的各种不同类型的故事。
Today's show-- Matchmakers.
今天的节目——媒人。
We've arrived at act two of our show.
我们已经到了演出的第二幕了。
Act Two, Part of Me, Why Not Take Part of Me.
第二幕，我的一部分，为什么不成为我的一部分。
The woman in this next story was on our show briefly, once before, talking about how she donated a kidney as a good deed, and lied to her own mother about it until after the surgery.
下一个故事中的那位女士曾在我们的节目中短暂出现过一次，谈论她如何捐献肾脏作为一件好事，并在手术后向她自己的母亲撒谎。
But after that experience, this woman, who's an orthodox Jewish woman named Chaya Lipschutz, started noticing all these ads where people were looking for donors, desperate people.
但在那次经历之后，这位名叫 Chaya Lipschutz 的正统犹太女性开始注意到所有这些广告，人们在寻找捐赠者，绝望的人。
And because she couldn't donate a second time herself, she decided to devote herself to rounding up potential kidney donors and matching them up with strangers in need of kidneys.
由于她自己无法再次捐赠，她决定致力于寻找潜在的肾脏捐赠者，并将他们与需要肾脏的陌生人进行匹配。
She became, basically, a kidney matchmaker.
她基本上成为了肾脏媒人。
Mary Robertson and Sarah Koenig co-reported this story which Sarah tells.
玛丽·罗伯逊和莎拉·科尼格共同报道了莎拉讲述的这个故事。
It's really, really hard to do what Chaya was trying to do.
要做 Chaya 想要做的事情真的非常非常困难。
She's trying to persuade people, alive people, to give their kidneys to people they've never met, who don't necessarily live anywhere near them, who have nothing to do with them.
她试图说服人们，活着的人，将他们的肾脏捐给他们从未见过的人，这些人不一定住在他们附近，也与他们没有任何关系。
Needless to say, people like this are very rare.
不用说，这样的人非常罕见。
For almost a year, Chaya posted ads on Craigslist in every state, under the volunteers section, seeking kidney donors.
近一年来，Chaya 在每个州的 Craigslist 志愿者版块下都发布了广告，寻找肾脏捐赠者。
Life is exactly the same-- Oh, I should say, do you know.
生活也是一样的——哦，我应该说，你知道吗。
Life is exactly-- OK, no I could just say, life is exactly the same with two kidneys as one--
生活就是——好吧，不，我只能说，两个肾脏合而为一，生活就完全一样——
She updates the ads constantly, answers people who respond.
她不断更新广告，回答有回应的人。
Hope you-- able to do this great act.
希望你能够做出这一伟大的举动。
Just think of how proud of you everyone who knows you will be.
想想看，每个认识你的人都会为你感到多么自豪。
But even when someone says they want to donate, maybe they don't follow through.
但即使有人说他们想捐款，他们也可能不会这么做。
And every hospital has different rules, so people get rejected all the time for different reasons.
每家医院都有不同的规定，所以人们总是因为不同的原因被拒绝。
Or maybe there's a problem with their tests, or a family member talks them out of it.
或者他们的测试有问题，或者家庭成员劝说他们不要这样做。
It can be constant frustration and disappointment.
这可能是持续的沮丧和失望。
And for the first year of trying, it was.
在第一年的尝试中，确实如此。
None of Chaya's matches went through.
Chaya 的比赛都没有进行。
An then Chaya got a break.
然后 Chaya 休息了。
This woman, Sandy, who heard Chaya give a talk about kidney donation at a synagogue, called Chaya up and said she wanted to donate and was all enthusiastic about it.
这位名叫桑迪（Sandy）的女士在犹太教堂听到查亚（Chaya）关于肾脏捐赠的演讲后，给查亚（Chaya）打电话，说她想捐赠并且对此充满热情。
And Chaya was thrilled.
查亚很兴奋。
She matched her up with this guy, Max.
她把她和这个人配对，麦克斯。
The blood type was the same, and it was all working out.
血型相同，一切都很顺利。
She was very excited about it, because she happens to know the family.
她对此感到非常兴奋，因为她恰好认识这家人。
And she's good friends with the daughter.
而且她和女儿是好朋友。
I was like, ah, perfect.
我当时想，啊，完美。
So even when I told her that I have a back up, she didn't want to hear of it.
所以即使我告诉她我有后盾，她也不想听。
This was her beshert.
这是她的坚持。
This is the person who was meant for her.
这就是为她而生的人。
Beshert is a Yiddish word that means destiny.
Besert 是意第绪语，意思是命运。
And it's almost always used for romantic matches.
它几乎总是用于浪漫的比赛。
And that's kind of how Chaya sees what she is doing.
Chaya 就是这样看待自己所做的事情的。
Not that it's romantic, of course, but that she's connecting strangers in the most intimate way possible.
当然，这并不是说这很浪漫，而是她以尽可能最亲密的方式联系陌生人。
She hopes the people will bond.
她希望人们能够团结起来。
Maybe Sandy and Max will become like family to each other.
也许桑迪和麦克斯会变得像家人一样。
Then on the day the surgery, when Sandy and Max were in the operating room, IVs in their arms and everything, they did a last minute blood test on Sandy.
然后在手术当天，当桑迪和马克斯在手术室里，手臂上插着静脉注射器和其他东西时，他们在最后一刻对桑迪进行了血液检查。
And it showed a problem, and the whole thing fell apart.
这表明了一个问题，整个事情就崩溃了。
Chaya was crestfallen.
夏亚垂头丧气。
She left a message on my colleague Mary's machine, one of many, many, long messages about the Sandy situation.
她在我同事玛丽的机器上留下了一条消息，这是关于桑迪情况的许多、许多、长消息之一。
Hi, Mary-- Chaya.
嗨，玛丽——查亚。
I spoke to the kidney transplant coordinator at the hospital.
我与医院的肾移植协调员进行了交谈。
And it's just a mess, it's just a mess--
这只是一团糟，这只是一团糟——
And then, in the same message, Chaya is on to her next problem.
然后，在同一条消息中，Chaya 开始解决她的下一个问题。
This older guy, Abe Salem, had been waiting for kidney.
这位名叫阿贝·塞勒姆（Abe Salem）的老家伙一直在等待肾脏。
But he'd gotten too sick for surgery, so she skipped over him.
但他病得太重，无法进行手术，所以她跳过了他。
But now, he was ready, and she wasn't sure she had a donor.
但现在，他已经准备好了，而她不确定自己是否有捐赠者。
She'd originally offered up her brother to Abe, but then, when Abe got so sick, she matched up her brother with this other man instead, Mark Raymon.
她最初将她的兄弟献给了亚伯，但后来，当亚伯病得很重时，她把她的兄弟与另一个男人，马克·雷蒙（Mark Raymon）相匹配。
Now she's overwhelmed.
现在她不知所措了。
I get clearance for Abe Salem.
我获得了阿贝·塞勒姆的许可。
I didn't tell you that?
我没告诉过你吗？
Abe Salem is ready to have a kidney transplant.
阿贝·塞勒姆准备进行肾移植。
Good grief, what am I going to do now.
好悲痛，我现在该怎么办。
Now they're all over my back with Salem's family.
现在他们和塞勒姆的家人都在我的背上。
Oh, my goodness.
哦，我的天啊。
It's crazy, it's crazy, so they want my brother now.
这太疯狂了，太疯狂了，所以他们现在想要我的兄弟。
Abe Salem wants my brother, Mark Raymon wants my brother.
阿贝·塞勒姆想要我的兄弟，马克·雷蒙想要我的兄弟。
Bye.
再见。
Chaya's an unlikely agent for this line of work.
查亚不太可能担任这一行的代理人。
She's not connected to a hospital.
她与医院没有联系。
She's not a social worker.
她不是社会工作者。
She's never been trained in the subtle, ethical considerations that go into living donor transplants.
她从未接受过关于活体捐赠者移植的微妙道德考虑的培训。
To be blunt, she's eccentric.
说实话，她很古怪。
She's excitable.
她很兴奋。
And she's emotionally involved with the cases on her list.
她对清单上的案件充满感情。
She doesn't strong-arm potential donors, but she does nudge and cajole.
她不会对潜在的捐赠者施以强硬手段，但她会推动和哄骗。
And she doesn't offer money, which is a illegal, but she does offer the promise that if you donate, people will think the world of you.
她并没有提供金钱，这是非法的，但她确实承诺，如果你捐款，人们会为你着想。
You will feel gratified.
你会感到欣慰。
It will boost your self-esteem.
它会提高你的自尊心。
An expectation of quid pro quo which might horrify a professional transplant coordinator.
对交换条件的期望可能会让专业移植协调员感到恐惧。
Frankly, some hospitals are wary of Chaya and won't deal with her.
坦白说，有些医院对Chaya持戒心，不会接待她。
But here she is, dedicating almost all her time, unpaid, trying to save these kidney patients.
但她在这里，奉献了几乎所有的时间，无偿地试图拯救这些肾病患者。
Within days of the Sandy disappointment, Chaya has rebounded and she's trying to match her brother, Yosef, with Mark Raymon.
在桑迪令人失望的几天内，查亚已经反弹，她正在努力与她的兄弟约瑟夫和马克·雷蒙相匹配。
Abe, by this time, had dropped out again.
此时，安倍再次退出。
If this works, it'll be her first successful match.
如果成功的话，这将是她第一场成功的比赛。
Mark, hi, good morning, it's Chaya.
马克，嗨，早上好，我是 Chaya。
How are you?
你好吗？
Mark is 56.
马克今年 56 岁。
A computer guy who's been unable to work since his kidneys failed.
一名电脑人员，由于肾脏衰竭而无法工作。
He has to be on dialysis for three hours, three days a week.
他必须每周三天接受三个小时的透析。
Dialysis is pretty horrible.
透析是非常可怕的。
It's nowhere near as effective as a new kidney, and people die on dialysis all the time.
它远不如新肾脏那么有效，人们总是因透析而死亡。
So Chaya is constantly on the phone and the email, working out the details of a possible transplant for Mark.
所以查亚一直在打电话和发电子邮件，为马克制定可能的移植细节。
the problem with this case is that her brother is willing to donate, but he needs to do it by the following week, because he has to get back to work.
这个案例的问题是，她的兄弟愿意捐赠，但他需要在下周之前完成，因为他必须回去工作。
You know what, if you want my brother's kidney you're going to have to go out to Staten Island, not wait until next Monday or Tuesday, because it might be too late.
你知道吗，如果你想要我兄弟的肾脏，你就必须去史坦顿岛，而不是等到下周一或周二，因为可能为时已晚。
I'm just suggesting strongly, if you want a kidney by next week-- I'm sorry.
我只是强烈建议，如果你下周之前想要一个肾脏——我很抱歉。
Yes, yes, if they can-- tell them there's a possibility you won't get a kidney if-- huh?
是的，是的，如果他们可以——告诉他们，如果——嗯？
Mark Raymon and Yosef Lipschutz, Chaya's brother, go to the hospital in Brooklyn for their final round of tests, two days before the transplant is supposed to happen.
马克·雷蒙 (Mark Raymon) 和查亚 (Chaya) 的兄弟约瑟夫·利普舒茨 (Yosef Lipschutz) 前往布鲁克林的医院进行最后一轮检查，距离移植手术还有两天。
Yosef, the donor, might be the sweetest man I've ever met.
捐赠者约瑟夫可能是我见过的最可爱的人。
He's so nice, he thanks the nurses during routine questioning.
他非常友善，在例行询问时他感谢护士。
All right, any problems with your kidneys?
好吧，你的肾脏有什么问题吗？
None whatsoever, thank you.
一点也没有，谢谢。
Oh, thank you.
哦，谢谢。
He's never met Mark before, but they bumped into each other that morning at the admitting desk while they were signing in.
他以前从未见过马克，但那天早上他们在接待处签到时遇到了对方。
He said that you're very kind to do this thing.
他说你做这件事真是太好了。
I said, sure, my pleasure.
我说，当然，我很高兴。
And we discussed enough of the old neighborhood.
我们对老街区的话题也讨论得够多了。
He lives in Borough Park.
他住在自治市公园。
I used to live in Borough Park.
我以前住在自治市公园。
A little chitchat, nothing special--
闲聊一下，没什么特别的——
We found Mark upstairs, waiting for his tests.
我们在楼上找到了马克，正在等待他的测试。
Did you have a vision in your head of what Yosef would look like, or how he would be, before you met him this morning?
在你今天早上见到尤瑟夫之前，你的脑海里是否已经想象过他会是什么样子，或者他会是什么样子？
Not really, but he looks OK.
不是真的，但他看起来还不错。
He's not overweight.
他没有超重。
He looks basically OK.
他看起来基本没问题。
So you were surveying him like for his health.
所以你正在调查他的健康状况。
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
是啊，是啊，是啊。
Sarah Koenig Sizing him up like--
莎拉·科尼格打量着他，就像——
I'd like to get a healthy kidney so that I can get on with my life.
我想要一个健康的肾脏，这样我就可以继续我的生活。
Mark is pretty worried about the transplant.
马克非常担心移植手术。
Not that it won't work, but that it won't happen.
并不是说它不起作用，而是它不会发生。
He's been through this before.
他以前经历过这样的事。
About a year ago, he got to just about this stage of a transplant when the donor's family convinced her to back out.
大约一年前，当捐赠者的家人说服她退出时，他的移植手术就到了这个阶段。
He was crushed.
他被压垮了。
Anything can go wrong.
任何事情都可能出错。
Even now, I mean, I coughed when I was being worked on by this lady inside, the nurse.
我的意思是，即使是现在，当我被里面的这位护士女士检查时，我仍然咳嗽。
She said, well if you're going to cough, that means you have a cold.
她说，如果你咳嗽，那就说明你感冒了。
If you have a cold, you can't be operated on.
如果你感冒了，就不能做手术。
And if they try to postpone it, then my donor's going to run away, because he has a work schedule to keep up.
如果他们试图推迟，那么我的捐赠者就会逃跑，因为他有工作日程要跟上。
So I'm not going to cough the next time.
所以下次我不会再咳嗽了。
The next person I talk to, I'm not going to cough.
下一个与我交谈的人，我不会咳嗽。
So it's so tense.
所以才这么紧张。
Mark Raymon Yeah, that's right.
马克·雷蒙 是的，没错。
Chaya's at the hospital too, making sure everything is moving ahead, making sure her brother's OK.
查亚也在医院，确保一切顺利进行，确保她哥哥一切都好。
I have a yogurt for you, and I brought a couple slices of whole wheat bread.
我给你准备了一杯酸奶，还带了几片全麦面包。
We have to make sure your kidneys are going to stay in good health till Wednesday at least.
我们必须确保您的肾脏至少在周三之前保持良好健康。
She's a little agitated.
她有点激动。
Every few minutes, she adjusting this bobby pin that's in the back of her long dark hair, but that doesn't actually seem to be holding anything in place.
每隔几分钟，她就会调整一下长长的黑发后面的发夹，但实际上它似乎并没有固定任何东西。
And she's writing notes all the time on these little strips of cardboard that she keeps in her purse.
她一直在放在钱包里的这些小纸板条上写笔记。
I realize there the things you pull off the top of a Kleenex box.
我意识到你可以从纸巾盒的顶部拉出一些东西。
The hospital administration arranges a photographer to take a PR picture of Mark and Yosef.
医院管理部门安排了一名摄影师为马克和约瑟夫拍摄一张公关照片。
It's a big thing for the hospital to have a stranger donate his kidney like this.
像这样有一个陌生人捐肾，对于医院来说是一件大事。
So they put them next to each other on a bench, and it's incredibly awkward.
所以他们把他们并排放在长凳上，这非常尴尬。
They shake hands, pretend to meet again for the first time.
他们握手，假装再次见面。
Nice meeting you, hopefully everything turns out all right.
很高兴认识你，希望一切顺利。
No, it's no fun that.
不，这没什么好玩的。
Sarah Koenig Chaya is beaming.
莎拉·科尼格·查亚 (Sarah Koenig Chaya) 笑容满面。
She's got her camera out too.
她也拿出了相机。
Everyone's feeling good.
每个人都感觉很好。
And Mark is starting to relax.
马克开始放松。
Now I'm beginning to believe, God willing, that this is going to happen.
现在我开始相信，上帝保佑，这将会发生。
Obviously, I've been disappointed before, but this time I believe this is, God willing, is going to be.
显然，我以前也曾失望过，但这一次我相信，上帝愿意，这将会是这样。
Seconds after he says that, Vicki, the hospital's transplant coordinator, walks up and says she's got to talk to Yosef and Mark.
他说完这句话后几秒钟，医院的移植协调员维姬走过来说她必须与约瑟夫和马克谈谈。
She says, there's a little bit of a situation.
她说，有一点情况。
Can I tape this?
我可以把这个录下来吗？
Victoria Maursky No, this is not good.
维多利亚·莫斯基 不，这不好。
OK.
好的。
A drug called Plavix showed up in one of Mark's blood tests.
马克的一次血液检查中发现了一种名为波立维（Plavix）的药物。
It's a blood thinner he takes.
他服用的是一种血液稀释剂。
They'll have to postpone the surgery until the following Monday, when the Plavix will be out of Mark's system.
他们必须将手术推迟到下周一，届时波立维将退出马克的系统。
But Monday is after Yosef's deadline, when he's supposed to be back at work.
但周一是约瑟夫的最后期限之后，他应该回到工作岗位。
Chaya looks stricken.
查亚看起来很震惊。
So does Mark.
马克也是如此。
And then Vicki asks Yosef right there, in front of everybody, whether he'll still donate, even though he's said many times, he needs to have it done by the end of this week.
然后维基当着所有人的面问约瑟夫他是否还会捐赠，尽管他已经说过很多次了，他需要在本周末之前完成捐赠。
Yosef pauses, and then says, he will.
约瑟夫停顿了一下，然后说，他会的。
That was hard that they told you that right while he's sitting there.
当他坐在那里的时候他们就告诉你了，这很难受。
You can't refuse.
你无法拒绝。
I can't refuse, number one and luckily, I have an open date sort of like next week.
我无法拒绝，第一，幸运的是，我有一个类似下周的开放日期。
I just hope that it's not postponed anymore.
我只是希望它不再被推迟。
Too, just to have him sitting there like, what can you say.
也是，只是让他坐在那里，你能说什么。
Well, I'm not going to break his heart.
好吧，我不会伤他的心。
You know what I mean?
你知道我的意思？
Could you see that he was looking heartbroken?
你看得出他一脸心碎的样子吗？
I felt it.
我感觉到了。
I didn't have to look, I just could feel it.
我不必看，我只是能感觉到。
Chaya sometimes downplays what she's doing, but this is huge for her, maybe her life's purpose.
查亚有时会淡化自己所做的事情，但这对她来说意义重大，也许是她人生的目的。
And in her circles, Orthodox Jewish circles, it's crucial that she have a purpose.
在她的圈子里，即正统犹太圈子里，她有一个目标至关重要。
I didn't realize this until I asked her what I thought was an innocent question, how old she was.
直到我问了她一个我认为很无辜的问题：她多大了，我才意识到这一点。
I don't want to say.
我不想说。
I don't want to say.
我不想说。
Ask me another time.
下次再问我吧。
Wait, how come you don't want to tell me how old you are?
等等，你为什么不想告诉我你多大了？
I don't want to say.
我不想说。
I don't know, I don't want to say.
我不知道，我不想说。
You don't want, in the story, for anyone to know how old you are?
在故事中，你不想让任何人知道你的年龄吗？
Right.
正确的。
Sarah Koenig Do you feel uncomfortable with your age?
Sarah Koenig 你对自己的年龄感到不舒服吗？
Yeah, and you know why?
是的，你知道为什么吗？
Because I'm not married.
因为我还没结婚。
And so it like looks strange.
所以看起来很奇怪。
Someone my age should be married.
我这个年纪的人应该结婚了。
In her world, a Jewish girl finishes high school and then gets married and has babies.
在她的世界里，一个犹太女孩高中毕业，然后结婚生子。
It's what her sisters did, what her girlfriends did.
这就是她的姐妹们所做的，她的女朋友们所做的。
Chaya came close, but it never happened.
Chaya 很接近，但它从未发生过。
And now she's a woman of undetermined age, living with her elderly mother in a tiny, two room basement apartment in Borough Park, an Orthodox neighborhood in Brooklyn.
现在，她是一名年龄不详的女性，与年迈的母亲住在布鲁克林东正教社区博罗公园的一间狭小的两居室地下室公寓里。
Chaya's an anomaly here, and she feels it every day.
查亚在这里是个异常者，她每天都有这种感觉。
She knows her landlady and the other tenants in the building probably talk about her.
她知道她的女房东和大楼里的其他房客可能都在谈论她。
I don't know exactly what people are thinking, but I'm assuming like they see, they look at me like, oh, she's not married.
我不知道人们到底在想什么，但我假设就像他们看到的那样，他们看着我，就像，哦，她还没结婚。
And they probably say, oh, that's terrible.
他们可能会说，哦，那太糟糕了。
Or we feel bad for her.
或者我们为她感到难过。
I'm sure they feel that way.
我确信他们也有这样的感觉。
I'm sure they feel that way.
我确信他们也有这样的感觉。
Yeah, you know, I kind of feel like an outsider, in a way, because I am different from them.
是的，你知道，在某种程度上，我感觉自己像个局外人，因为我与他们不同。
That must be hard though to feel sort of different or even judged, or that people are out there like pitying you for something.
感觉有点不同，甚至受到评判，或者人们因为某些事情而同情你，这一定很难。
Yeah, yeah it does, it does.
是的，是的，确实如此，确实如此。
I do feel kind of funny about it.
我确实觉得有点好笑。
Like sometimes I do wonder, what are they thinking when they see me, whatever.
就像有时我确实想知道，他们看到我时在想什么，无论如何。
They also could think there's something wrong with me mentally.
他们也可能认为我精神上有问题。
But I feel bad for my mother, because I'm sure she has people say, oh, so how many children do you have, and how many children are married, and this and that.
但我为我的母亲感到难过，因为我确信有人会对她说，哦，那么你有多少个孩子，有多少个孩子结婚了，等等。
And I'm sure she'd love to say, all them.
我相信她很乐意说，所有这些。
I know she probably skips the subject.
我知道她可能会跳过这个话题。
Sometimes she tells me, now I know why, what your purpose in life is.
有时她告诉我，现在我知道为什么了，你的人生目标是什么。
And so she sees that maybe this was my purpose in life.
所以她认为这也许就是我的人生目标。
So because Chaya can't call herself a wife or a mother, it's almost like, to her neighbors, she has no identity at all.
因此，因为 Chaya 不能称自己为妻子或母亲，所以对于她的邻居来说，她几乎没有任何身份。
She's had to find one, kidney matchmaker.
她必须找到一位肾媒。
But for that title to make sense, she has to actually arrange at least one successful match.
但为了让这个头衔有意义，她必须实际上安排至少一场成功的比赛。
It helps explain why she's so worried that something's going to go wrong on Monday, the day of the surgery.
这有助于解释为什么她如此担心周一手术当天会出现问题。
That morning, they do a final blood test on Yosef.
那天早上，他们对约瑟夫进行了最后一次血液检查。
But what if they took blood from him now, what if they find out something is not--
但如果他们现在从他身上取血怎么办，如果他们发现有些东西不是——
Like what?
比如什么？
Chaya Lipschutz I don't know?
查亚·利普舒茨 我不知道？
What do they take, a CBC now and all that?
他们拿什么，现在是 CBC 等等？
I mean I don't think-- Chaya Lipschutz No, because-- listen.
我的意思是我不认为——Chaya Lipschutz 不，因为——听着。
Anything can happen, even at last minute.
任何事情都有可能发生，即使是在最后一刻。
It's 6:00 AM and Mark and Yosef are in a pre-op room separated by a curtain.
现在是早上 6:00，马克和约瑟夫在手术前的房间里，中间用窗帘隔开。
A team of medical people is getting them ready.
一组医疗人员正在为他们做好准备。
A doctor puts an x on Yosef's left side to mark which kidney they're going to take.
医生在约瑟夫的左侧画了一个“X”，以标记他们要取出哪个肾脏。
Chaya's checking in on both of them.
Chaya 正在检查他们两个。
She takes the opportunity to lecture Mark a little.
她借此机会对马克进行了一些教训。
Take good care of my brother's kidney when you get out of the hospital.
出院后好好照顾弟弟的肾脏。
Eat healthy, high fiber, low fat--
健康饮食，高纤维，低脂肪——
I plan on it.
我正计划着呢。
Chaya Lipschutz That's the condition.
Chaya Lipschutz 就是这样。
If you want my brother's kidney, you got to take care of it and yourself.
如果你想要我哥哥的肾脏，你就必须照顾好它和你自己。
I'd plan on it.
我会计划一下。
Chaya Lipschutz Otherwise, he's going to take it back.
Chaya Lipschutz 否则，他会把它收回来。
I'm only kidding.
我只是开玩笑。
Mark doesn't say anything.
马克什么也没说。
Yosef's surgeon arrives.
约瑟夫的外科医生来了。
We're on it.
我们正在努力。
This is it.
就是这样。
The moment of truth.
关键时刻。
Yeah, just grab the IV for me.
是的，帮我拿一下静脉注射吧。
Tell your sister you'll see her later, OK?
告诉你姐姐你稍后会见到她，好吗？
OK.
好的。
Sarah Koenig The nurse just asked Yosef if he's ready to roll.
Sarah Koenig 护士刚刚问 Yosef 是否准备好翻身了。
Meaning, is he ready to have four small incisions to cut loose his kidney, and then a larger incision that the person with the smallest hand on the surgical team will reach into and pull out his kidney.
意思是，他是否准备好做四个小切口来切开他的肾脏，然后做一个更大的切口，让手术团队中手最小的人伸入并拉出他的肾脏。
The answer is yes.
答案是肯定的。
Yosef is ready to roll.
约瑟夫已经准备好出发了。
Chaya hands over small holy book that she hopes will keep her brother safe.
查雅交出了一本小圣书，她希望这本书能保证她弟弟的安全。
Chaya yells out to the surgeon.
查亚向外科医生大喊。
She's freaking out.
她吓坏了。
She's still thinking this could all go wrong.
她仍然认为这一切都可能出错。
How will I know when they start the surgery, can somebody come out and say it's started?
我怎么知道他们什么时候开始手术，有人可以出来说手术已经开始了吗？
No. What time is it starting?
没有。几点开始？
Usually, it's going to start, I'd say in about 20 minutes from now.
通常情况下，我会说从现在起大约 20 分钟后就会开始。
Because I don't want to leave.
因为我不想离开。
I want to know that it's started.
我想知道它已经开始了。
I don't want to here that he backed out or something last minute.
我不想说他在最后一刻退出了。
I'll ask somebody to come out and let you know.
我会请人出来通知你。
Thank you very much, thank you, yes, thanks.
非常感谢，谢谢，是的，谢谢。
You know what, don't-- I mean, it's not funny, because I know somebody who backed out the day of the surgery.
你知道吗，不——我的意思是，这并不好笑，因为我认识一个人在手术当天退出了。
I hope they lock the doors there.
我希望他们把门锁在那里。
Yosef doesn't run out of the operating room, and now Chaya just has to wait.
约瑟夫没有跑出手术室，现在查亚只能等待。
One of her older sisters is there too, Aliza.
她的一位姐姐也在那里，艾丽莎。
They talk about the things you talk about when you're trying to pass five or six hours.
他们谈论你在试图打发五六个小时时谈论的事情。
Aliza has no trouble with this, she can really, really talk.
艾莉莎对此没有任何问题，她真的真的可以说话。
About her own operations.
关于她自己的操作。
I remember when I had my tumor on my ovary many, many years ago.
我记得很多很多年前我的卵巢上长了肿瘤。
And they had to operate.
他们必须进行手术。
They had to do so much cutting.
他们必须做很多切割工作。
Today, thank the Almighty, they do so much cutting.
今天，感谢全能的上帝，他们做了这么多切割。
About her bus driver on the way to the hospital.
关于她去医院途中的公交车司机。
He made a whole big deal about my shopping cart.
他对我的购物车小题大做。
Take the stuff out of the shopping cart.
把东西从购物车里拿出来。
You can't come on the bus with a shopping cart.
你不能推着购物车上公交车。
And I left, be well [SPEAKING YIDDISH] have a good day.
我离开了，祝你好[说意第绪语]祝你有美好的一天。
I couldn't believe it.
我简直不敢相信。
I don't know if he was Jewish.
我不知道他是不是犹太人。
It doesn't matter.
没关系。
It was nice of him to say that.
他这么说真是太好了。
About the kosher joke book she's written.
关于她写的犹太笑话书。
Two pelicans went into a restaurant, it's a corny joke, and they-- what do you call it-- they ate a meal.
两只鹈鹕走进一家餐馆，这是一个老生常谈的笑话，它们——你管它叫什么——吃了一顿饭。
And they said where is the bill?
他们说账单在哪里？
The bill?
账单？
They have a bill.
他们有账单。
Two pelicans go into a restaurant, they say where is the bill?
两只鹈鹕走进一家餐馆，它们说账单在哪里？
And then, finally, it's over.
然后，最后，一切都结束了。
Everyone's fine.
每个人都很好。
They can go visit Yosef.
他们可以去拜访约瑟夫。
And it's at this moment that what Chaya has done suddenly becomes clear, most of all to her.
就在这一刻，查亚所做的事情突然变得清晰起来，尤其是对她而言。
For an instant, her single-minded kidney advocacy vanishes, and she's just a sister, looking at her brother, lying in the ICU.
刹那间，她一心一意的肾脏倡导消失了，她只是一个妹妹，看着躺在重症监护室的哥哥。
Hi, oh no, you look bad.
嗨，哦不，你看起来很糟糕。
Sarah Koenig He does look bad.
莎拉·柯尼格 他看起来确实很糟糕。
He's barely conscious.
他几乎没有意识。
And from the expression on his face, it seems like he's in too much pain to even speak.
而且从他的表情来看，他似乎已经痛苦得连话都说不出来了。
They tell you to squeeze some pain medicine?
他们叫你挤点止痛药？
No. Chaya Lipschutz No?
没有。Chaya Lipschutz 没有？
Should I ask them to do something?
我应该要求他们做点什么吗？
Yes.
是的。
Chaya Lipschutz Excuse me, what are they going to do for his pain?
Chaya Lipschutz 打扰一下，他们会采取什么措施来缓解他的疼痛？
Chaya had worried about this, about how much it would hurt him, how he would handle it when he woke up.
茶雅曾担心过这件事，担心这会对他造成多大的伤害，担心他醒来后该如何处理。
She goes back out into the hall.
她回到大厅。
Are you OK?
你还好吗？
Chaya Lipschutz Yeah, I'm OK.
Chaya Lipschutz 是的，我很好。
[CRYING] I'm going to be OK.
[哭泣]我会没事的。
he's in pain?
他很痛苦吗？
Chaya Lipschutz Yeah.
查亚·利普舒茨 是的。
She says he's not in pain, and that he's just very tired.
她说他并不痛苦，只是很累。
Looked like he's falling asleep, which is good.
看起来他正在睡觉，这很好。
Let him sleep maybe.
也许让他睡吧。
And just like that, Chaya has snaps out of it.
就这样，Chaya 摆脱了困境。
If she had any doubts about her purpose after seeing Yosef, they were fleeting.
如果她在见到尤瑟夫后对自己的目的有任何怀疑，那也是转瞬即逝的。
She goes back into his room and spends the rest of the day with him in recovery.
她回到他的房间，与他一起度过这一天剩下的康复时间。
After a couple of nerve-racking weeks of complications the transplant took.
经过几周令人心烦意乱的并发症后，移植手术开始了。
Yosef went back to work, and Mark did too.
约瑟夫回去工作了，马克也回去了。
A year later, they're not really in touch.
一年后，他们就不再联系了。
For her part, Chaya is still at it.
就Chaya 而言，她仍在努力。
In the past year, she's made two other successful matches, saved two more lives.
在过去的一年里，她又成功完成了两场比赛，又挽救了两条生命。
And now she is not so anxious about the whole endeavor.
现在她对整个努力不再那么焦虑了。
She's proved to everyone that she's a bona fide matchmaker.
她向所有人证明了她是一个真正的媒人。
Her mother is very proud.
她的母亲非常自豪。
Sarah Koenig is one of the producers of our show.
莎拉·科尼格是我们节目的制片人之一。
She co-reported that story with Mary Robertson.
她与玛丽·罗伯逊共同报道了这个故事。
[MUSIC - "STRANGER IN LOVE" BY JOHN HOLT]
[音乐 - 约翰·霍尔特的《恋爱中的陌生人》]
Act Three, Babies Buying Babies.
第三幕，婴儿买婴儿。
Elna Baker always wanted to be an actress.
艾尔娜·贝克一直想成为一名演员。
But when she graduated from college, the only acting job she could get in New York City was at a toy store, FAO Schwarz, where they had salespeople put on costumes to demonstrate various toys.
但当她大学毕业时，她在纽约能找到的唯一一份表演工作是在一家玩具店FAO Schwarz，那里的销售人员穿上戏服展示各种玩具。
And this, is where Elna Baker accidentally got into the matchmaking game.
而这，就是艾尔娜·贝克不小心进入牵线搭桥游戏的地方。
For the first few weeks I rotated from toy to toy so that Chad, the FAO toy demo manager, could analyze my acting strengths before placing me on a specific product.
在最初的几周里，我轮流从一个玩具到另一个玩具，以便粮农组织玩具演示经理乍得能够分析我的表演优势，然后再给我安排特定的产品。
I demonstrated anything from Robo-transformers to plush puppets.
我展示了从机器人变形金刚到毛绒木偶的各种东西。
There was a preschool veterinarian kit, and it came with a stuffed puppy and doctor tools.
有一个学前兽医工具包，里面有一只毛绒小狗和医生工具。
For six hours I was supposed to fake diagnose an inanimate object and get other people excited about it.
在六个小时里，我应该假装诊断一个无生命的物体，并让其他人对此感到兴奋。
I would interrupt families as they strolled through the store.
当家人在商店里闲逛时，我会打断他们。
Spot is sick, will you help me figure out what's wrong with Spot?
Spot 病了，你能帮我看看 Spot 出了什么问题吗？
And then I would hand the child a stethoscope, while the parents waited impatiently.
然后我递给孩子一个听诊器，而父母则焦急地等待着。
I might as well have said, you and your family want to be left alone, but I'm an actor.
我还不如说，你和你的家人想要一个人呆着，但我是一名演员。
After two weeks of rotating, I was assigned to the Lee Middleton Doll collection.
经过两周的轮换，我被分配到李·米德尔顿娃娃系列。
This was a coveted position.
这是一个令人垂涎的职位。
Lee Middleton Dolls were special.
李·米德尔顿娃娃很特别。
We were told that they were made with materials developed by NASA.
我们被告知它们是用美国宇航局开发的材料制成的。
They looked exactly like real babies, and they were weighted in the head and in the bottom so that they actually flopped like real babies.
它们看起来和真正的婴儿一模一样，而且它们的头部和底部都有重量，所以它们实际上像真正的婴儿一样扑通扑通。
Every day I dressed in a nurse's uniform, and I worked with two other nurses slash actresses in the adoption center, a small cottage on the second floor of a FAO Schwartz.
我每天都穿着护士制服，和另外两名护士一起在收养中心（FAO Schwartz 的二楼的一间小小屋）里砍女演员。
A typical day of work would go as follows.
典型的一天工作如下。
Parents and their children would go from incubator to incubator admiring all the babies.
父母和他们的孩子会从一个保温箱走到另一个保温箱，欣赏所有的婴儿。
If they decided that they were serious about adoption, we would open the gate to the white picket fence that surrounded the cottage and invite them inside.
如果他们决定认真收养，我们就会打开小屋周围白色尖桩篱笆的大门，邀请他们进去。
We would sit across from the perspective parent, usually a seven year old girl, in one of two rocking chairs and begin an adoption interview.
我们会坐在准父母（通常是一个七岁的女孩）对面，坐在两把摇椅中的一张上，开始收养采访。
Do you promise to love and care for the baby?
您承诺爱护并照顾宝宝吗？
Will you read to the baby?
你会给宝宝读书吗？
Will you change the baby's diaper?
你会给宝宝换尿布吗？
Yes, the little girls would answer with sincerity.
是的，小姑娘们一定会很真诚地回答。
And then the final question, what would you like to name the baby?
最后一个问题，你想给宝宝起什么名字？
The girls always chose frilly names like Princess Tiffany of Fairy Flower Land.
女孩们总是选择一些华丽的名字，比如仙女花国的蒂芙尼公主。
We would write Princess Tiffany on the doll's hospital bracelet, along with the date of birth, which usually happened to be the previous day.
我们会在娃娃的医院手镯上写上蒂芙尼公主，以及出生日期，通常是前一天。
And then we would fill out a birth certificate.
然后我们会填写出生证明。
We would hand the birth certificate to the little girl's parents and say, now all you have to do is pay the adoption fee, wink, wink.
我们会把出生证明交给小女孩的父母，然后说，现在你们要做的就是交收养费，眨眼，眨眼。
We were instructed by Chad never to use words like cost, purchase, or buy.
查德指示我们永远不要使用诸如成本、购买或购买之类的词。
He said that that would quote, break the illusion of the world, unquote.
他说那会引用，打破世界的幻想，取消引用。
When work got slow, us nurses were not allowed to socialize.
当工作进展缓慢时，我们护士不被允许进行社交活动。
According to Chad that would also break the illusion of the world.
查德认为，这也将打破世界的幻想。
Instead, if we weren't working with a customer, we had to always be holding, rocking, or bouncing the display baby doll.
相反，如果我们不与客户合作，我们就必须始终握住、摇动或弹跳展示的娃娃。
The display baby doll is on display for a reason.
展示娃娃的展示是有原因的。
It could not be sold.
它无法出售。
Something terrible happened in the factory on the day of its birth, because the dolls fingers were not like the other babies.
在它出生的那天，工厂里发生了一件可怕的事情，因为娃娃的手指与其他婴儿不同。
They had been molded together making it look like it had flippers instead of hands.
它们被模制在一起，使它看起来像是有脚蹼而不是手。
As if that weren't bad enough, it had curly red hair, scary green eyes, and its head weighed at least five pounds more than all the other babies' heads.
好像这还不够糟糕，它有一头卷曲的红色头发，可怕的绿色眼睛，它的头比所有其他婴儿的头至少重五磅。
As a result, when you lifted the baby, its head would automatically flop back, and its little flippers would flip up like a monster baby.
结果，当你抱起婴儿时，它的头会自动向后仰，小脚蹼也会像怪物婴儿一样翻转起来。
Which is how the doll earned its nickname.
这就是这个娃娃赢得绰号的由来。
We called it Nubbins.
我们称之为努宾斯。
And because Nubbins was for display purposes only, he didn't have an incubator like the other babies.
由于纳宾斯仅用于展示目的，因此他没有像其他婴儿一样有保温箱。
Instead, he was kept in a cupboard.
相反，他被关在橱柜里。
This was especially disturbing, because Nubbins had a knack for looking realistically dead.
这尤其令人不安，因为纳宾斯有一种让自己看上去像死了一样的本领。
So when you'd open the cupboard, you'd find him slumped over onto his enormous head, with his arms flopped behind him like he died in a yoga class.
所以当你打开橱柜时，你会发现他倒在他巨大的头上，双臂垂在身后，就像他死在瑜伽课上一样。
September and October are traditionally slow months at FAO Schwarz.
传统上，九月和十月是FAO Schwarz 的淡季。
And with no customers to attend to, we spent a lot of time holding, rocking, and bouncing baby Nubbins.
由于没有顾客需要照顾，我们花了很多时间抱着、摇晃和弹跳小纳宾。
So much time that we actually started to resent him.
时间太长，我们实际上开始怨恨他。
So to entertain ourselves we invented a game.
因此，为了娱乐自己，我们发明了一种游戏。
Actually, I invented it, but the other girls went along with it.
事实上，这是我发明的，但其他女孩也同意了。
The object of the game was this, while a nurse was working with a customer, you had to try and get her to break character by doing something horrible to baby Nubbins.
游戏的目标是这样的，当一名护士正在与一位顾客一起工作时，你必须试图让她打破性格，对小纳宾斯做一些可怕的事情。
For example, I'd open all the doors to all the cabinets in the adoption center, and while another nurse was doing an adoption, I'd carefully walk down the aisle and rock Nubbins's head into the jagged edges of each drawer, while humming a lullaby.
例如，我会打开收养中心所有柜子的所有门，当另一位护士正在进行收养时，我会小心地沿着过道走，将纳宾斯的头摇到每个抽屉的锯齿状边缘，同时哼着摇篮曲。
It was fun to torture Nubbins in front of each other, but it was even better when there was a crowd of people standing outside the adoption center.
当着彼此的面折磨纳宾斯很有趣，但当收养中心外面站着一群人时，那就更好了。
It took real comedic timing.
这需要真正的喜剧时机。
You'd change Nubbins's diaper on the diaper changing table.
你可以在尿布更换台上给纳宾斯换尿布。
Then you'd carefully lift him.
然后你小心翼翼地把他抱起来。
You'd gently place him on your shoulder and burp him ever so slightly.
你轻轻地将他放在你的肩膀上，轻轻地给他打嗝。
And at just the right moment, you'd drop him.
在正确的时刻，你会抛弃他。
It worked every time.
每次都有效。
Everyone watching knew Nubbins wasn't real, but when he hit the floor, they still jumped and gasped.
每个观看的人都知道纳宾斯不是真的，但当他落地时，他们仍然跳了起来，喘着粗气。
And the best part was that they did it sync, so it looked like a minor earthquake had just occurred.
最棒的是他们做到了同步，所以看起来就像刚刚发生了一场小地震。
That is how us nurses spent our time.
我们护士就是这样度过时间的。
We'd sell overpriced dolls when we had customers, and we'd torture Nubbins when we didn't.
当我们有顾客时，我们会以高价出售娃娃；而当我们没有顾客时，我们会折磨纳宾斯。
And then one day, everything changed.
然后有一天，一切都改变了。
A few months before I started working as a toy demonstrator, two girls from the MTV reality show, Rich Girls , came in to FAO Schwartz with a camera crew and adopted a baby.
在我开始担任玩具展示员之前几个月，MTV 真人秀《Rich Girls》中的两个女孩带着摄制组来到FAO Schwartz 并收养了一个婴儿。
On November 15th the episode aired.
11月15日，该剧播出。
By 9 o'clock the next morning, every mother on the Upper East Side had to have a Lee Middleton Doll for her child.
到第二天早上 9 点，上东区的每位母亲都必须为自己的孩子准备一个李·米德尔顿娃娃。
There was a line of anxious parents and spoiled children outside the store.
商店外面排着一排焦急的父母和被宠坏的孩子。
We were doing adoptions left and right.
我们左右收养。
Gone were the days of horseplay and pranks.
恶作剧和恶作剧的日子已经一去不复返了。
This was real work, and it was exhausting.
这是真正的工作，而且很累。
Do you promise to love and care for the baby?
您承诺爱护并照顾宝宝吗？
Will you read to the baby?
你会给宝宝读书吗？
Will you change the baby's diaper?
你会给宝宝换尿布吗？
What do you want to name the baby?
你想给宝宝起什么名字？
Fill out birth certificate, repeat.
填写出生证明，重复。
Business was so good that no one saw it coming until it was too late.
生意太好了，以至于没有人看到它的到来，直到为时已晚。
Within a week of the episode's air date, we sold out of all the white babies.
在该集播出后的一周内，我们所有的白人婴儿都被卖光了。
That's right, we sold out of all the white babies.
是的，我们把所有的白人婴儿都卖光了。
All we had left were incubator upon incubator of minority babies.
我们只剩下一个又一个少数民族婴儿的孵化器。
The manager of FAO Schwarz had a conniption fit.
粮农组织施瓦茨 (FAO Schwarz) 的经理患了癫痫病。
With Christmas only five weeks away, the Lee Middleton factory was already on back-order.
距离圣诞节只剩五周了，李·米德尔顿工厂的订单已经延期交货。
There was absolutely no way to get a new shipment in until mid-January.
直到一月中旬之前，绝对没有办法收到新货。
Day after day, the same scenario would repeat itself.
日复一日，同样的场景不断重演。
Eager mothers would rush to the adoption center.
热切的母亲们会涌向收养中心。
Is this the Lee Middleton Doll collection, they'd ask.
他们会问，这是李·米德尔顿娃娃系列吗？
Then they'd stop, dead in their tracks.
然后他们就会停下来，原地踏步。
I'd watch their heads go from incubator to incubator.
我会看着他们的头从一个孵化器转到另一个孵化器。
They'd pause briefly at the Asian baby.
他们会在亚洲婴儿面前短暂停留。
Oh-- no. And then, trying as hard as they could be politically correct, the mothers would look at us and say, do you have any other shades of babies?
哦——不。然后，妈妈们会尽最大努力保持政治正确，看着我们说，你们还有其他颜色的婴儿吗？
Chad, the toy demo manager, had prepped us with a response.
玩具演示经理查德已经为我们准备了回应。
He'd taped a memo in the women's locker room reading, if the mother's express a disinterest in the babies due to ethnicity, kindly inform them that while these are all the babies we have in stock, there's a wider selection available online.
他在女更衣室里录制了一份备忘录，上面写着，如果母亲因种族原因而对婴儿不感兴趣，请告诉她们，虽然这些都是我们库存的婴儿，但网上还有更多选择。
And they're more than welcome to order online.
我们非常欢迎他们在线订购。
But this is not what the mothers wanted to hear.
但这并不是妈妈们想听到的。
These dolls don't look like my little Susan, they'd explain, pointing to their child.
这些娃娃看起来不像我的小苏珊，他们指着自己的孩子解释道。
I want something that looks like Susan, wink, wink.
我想要像苏珊一样的东西，眨眼，眨眼。
Us nurses decided to make the most of the situation.
我们护士决定充分利用这种情况。
And so we invented another game.
所以我们发明了另一种游戏。
If a mother didn't want to adopt a doll because of its ethnicity, we worked on her child.
如果一位母亲因为种族原因不想收养一个娃娃，我们就会为她的孩子工作。
It was pretty easy.
这很容易。
First, we would ask the little girl if she wanted to hold one of the babies.
首先，我们会问小女孩是否想抱其中一个婴儿。
Wow, we'd exclaim.
哇，我们会惊呼。
This little baby has really taken to you.
这个小宝贝真的很喜欢你。
You look like you'd make an excellent mommy for her.
你看起来会成为她的优秀妈妈。
The little girls would gently stroke the babies while the mothers would look at us in a state of panic.
小女孩们会轻轻地抚摸婴儿，而妈妈们则会惊慌地看着我们。
You could almost hear them thinking, why are you doing this to me?
你几乎可以听到他们在想，你为什么要这样对我？
What did I ever do to you?
我对你做了什么？
The other game we invented stemmed from Chad's memo.
我们发明的另一个游戏源于查德的备忘录。
Instead of saying, there's a wider selection available online, we would try and say, there is a whiter selection available online, without getting caught or breaking character.
我们不会说，网上有更广泛的选择，而是尝试说，网上有更白人的选择，而不会被抓住或破坏性格。
In spite of these games, the situation still depressed me.
尽管玩了这些游戏，情况仍然让我感到沮丧。
I remember one mother in particular.
我特别记得一位母亲。
She was in her mid-30s with blond hair and a pinched face.
她三十多岁，金发，脸庞紧绷。
When I offered her an Hispanic baby, she looked at me and said, Oh, come on.
当我向她提供一个西班牙裔婴儿时，她看着我说，哦，来吧。
We don't want a dark child.
我们不想要一个黑暗的孩子。
What would people think it Jessica was carrying a dark baby?
如果杰西卡怀着一个深色的婴儿，人们会怎么想？
She touched my hand and looked into my eyes.
她碰触我的手，看着我的眼睛。
You know what I mean.
你知道我的意思。
I knew what she was trying to say.
我知道她想说什么。
She was saying that since we were both white, I understood her.
她说因为我们都是白人，所以我理解她。
But what she didn't know is that while I'm fair-skinned, I'm actually half-Mexican.
但她不知道的是，虽然我皮肤白皙，但我实际上有一半墨西哥血统。
And besides that, I did not know what she meant.
除此之外，我不知道她的意思。
Did she honestly think that if someone saw her daughter carrying a Hispanic baby doll that they would think that Juan, her gardener, had knocked her up?
她是否真的认为，如果有人看到她女儿抱着一个西班牙娃娃，他们会认为她的园丁胡安把她撞倒了？
There were so many things I wanted to say to these mothers.
我有很多话想对这些妈妈们说。
But that's when it sucks to be employed, because the customer's always right.
但到了这个时候，受雇就很糟糕了，因为顾客永远是对的。
So instead of speaking up, I took my hand out from under the pinched-face woman's and said, you are more than welcome to order online.
所以我没有说话，而是从那个捏着脸的女人的手下抽出手说，非常欢迎您在网上订购。
There's a whiter selection available online.
网上有更白的选择。
But this was only half of the story.
但这只是故事的一半。
Technically, we hadn't sold out of all the white babies.
从技术上讲，我们还没有卖完所有的白人婴儿。
Technically, we still had one left, Nubbins.
从技术上讲，我们还剩下一个，纳宾斯。
As a result, when mothers would rush to the adoption center and realize there were only minority babies, they'd immediately notice Nubbins.
因此，当母亲们赶到收养中心并意识到收养中心只有少数族裔婴儿时，她们会立即注意到纳宾斯。
They'd spot him in our arms, round and pudgy with a head of red hair.
他们会发现他在我们怀里，圆圆的，矮胖的，有一头红发。
He was the answer to their prayers.
他是他们祈祷的答案。
Can I see that baby?
我可以看看那个宝贝吗？
They would insist.
他们会坚持。
All we ever had to do was turn Nubbins around.
我们所要做的就是扭转纳宾斯的局面。
His head would flop back.
他的头会向后仰去。
His flippers would flip up.
他的脚蹼会向上翻转。
And the mothers would quickly say, never mind.
母亲们很快就会说，没关系。
This happened so often that eventually us nurses decided to make a bet.
这种情况经常发生，最终我们护士决定打赌。
Who do you think will go first, baby Nubbins or all the minority babies?
你认为谁会先走，小纳宾斯还是所有少数民族婴儿？
To be honest, when I've told this story in the past, and I've told it a number of times, I've said that I bet on the minority babies, because I thought Nubbins would be the last to go, if he'd go at all.
说实话，当我过去讲这个故事时，我已经讲过很多次了，我说过我赌少数族裔婴儿，因为我认为纳宾斯将是最后一个走的人，如果他真的会走的话。
And then what I'd say happened was that Nubbins sold first, leaving behind an entire toy nursery of minority babies and isn't that crazy.
然后我想说的是，纳宾斯首先卖掉了，留下了整个少数族裔婴儿的玩具托儿所，这不是那么疯狂吗？
But that wasn't exactly true.
但事实并非如此。
What actually happened was much harder to admit.
实际发生的事情更难以承认。
It was this.
就是这个。
The minority babies did start to sell, slowly.
少数族裔婴儿确实开始慢慢出售。
First, we sold out of all the Asian babies.
首先，我们把所有亚洲婴儿都卖光了。
Then we sold out of all the Hispanic babies.
然后我们就把所有西班牙裔婴儿卖光了。
And finally, all we had left was Nubbins and incubators of black baby dolls.
最后，我们只剩下纳宾斯和黑色娃娃的孵化器。
This just made us all feel worse.
这让我们都感觉更糟。
Inadvertently, the bet had become, who do you think will go first, Nubbins or every black baby in the nursery.
不经意间，赌注变成了，你认为谁会先走，纳宾斯还是托儿所里的每个黑人婴儿。
I stood by my initial bet.
我坚持最初的赌注。
We'll never sell Nubbins, I insisted.
我坚持说，我们永远不会出售纳宾斯。
And then a week later, a mother marched up to the adoption center.
一周后，一位母亲游行到收养中心。
Nurse, she yelled, is this some sort of a joke?
护士，她喊道，这是开玩笑吗？
Her face was frozen in disgust.
她的脸因厌恶而僵住了。
In one hand, she was holding a Bergdorf shopping bag, with the other she was dragging a very solemn child.
她一手拎着一个Bergdorf购物袋，另一只手拖着一个表情十分严肃的孩子。
Where are all the white babies?
白人婴儿都去哪儿了？
I wasn't used to the mothers being quite so direct.
我不习惯母亲们如此直接。
We're all out, I said.
我们都出去了，我说。
You have got to be kidding, she began.
你一定是在开玩笑，她开始说道。
And then her eyes focused on Nubbins, who was nestled in my arms.
然后她的目光集中在依偎在我怀里的纳宾斯身上。
What about that one, she asked.
那那个呢，她问道。
I turned Nubbins around, slowly, for full impact.
我慢慢地将纳宾斯转过身，以获得充分的冲击力。
His head flopped back.
他的头向后仰去。
His flippers flipped up.
他的脚蹼翻了起来。
I waited for her horrified response.
我等待着她惊恐的回答。
We'll take it, she said.
我们会接受它，她说。
What, I thought, Nubbins?
什么，我想，纳宾斯？
You want to adopt Nubbins?
你想收养纳宾斯吗？
Was Nubbins even up for adoption?
纳宾斯是否可以被收养？
I opened the white picket fence and escorted the mother and her daughter over to the rocking chairs.
我打开白色的栅栏，护送母亲和她的女儿到摇椅上。
I sat baby Nubbins in the solemn little girl's lap, sat in the seat across from her and began.
我把小纳宾斯放在那个庄严的小女孩的腿上，坐在她对面的座位上，开始了。
Do you promise to love and care for this baby?
你答应爱护这个孩子吗？
The little girl looked up at me.
小女孩抬头看着我。
No. I had been doing adoptions for two months now.
不，我已经做收养工作两个月了。
I'd interviewed hundreds of little girls.
我采访了数百个小女孩。
No one had ever answered no before.
以前从来没有人回答过“不”。
Technically she had just failed the adoption interview.
从技术上讲，她刚刚通过了收养面试。
For lack of a better response, I ignored her answer, and I moved on to the next question.
由于缺乏更好的答复，我忽略了她的回答，然后继续下一个问题。
Will you read to the baby?
你会给宝宝读书吗？
No. OK, I said, moving to the next question.
不，好吧，我说，然后转向下一个问题。
What would you like to name the baby?
你想给宝宝起什么名字？
Stupid, she said.
愚蠢，她说。
While I wasn't exactly Nubbins's best friend, I wasn't about to write Stupid on his birth certificate.
虽然我并不是纳宾斯最好的朋友，但我并不打算在他的出生证明上写上“愚蠢”。
Why don't we try calling him-- Just name the baby Veronica, her mother interrupted.
我们为什么不试着给他打电话——就给孩子起名叫维罗妮卡吧，她母亲打断道。
I scribbled Veronica in the name section of the baby bracelet and birth certificate and then I handed the paperwork to the mother.
我在婴儿手环和出生证明的名字部分写下了维罗妮卡，然后把文件交给了母亲。
As they walked away, I laid out a pink blanket instead of a blue one, and set Nubbins in the center.
当他们走开时，我铺了一条粉红色的毯子而不是蓝色的毯子，并将纳宾斯放在中间。
For the last time, his head flopped back, and his little flippers flipped up.
最后一次，他的头向后仰去，他的小脚蹼向上翻起。
That's when it hit me.
就在那时，它击中了我。
Nubbins has been adopted.
纳宾斯已被收养。
There will be no more Nubbins.
不会再有纳宾了。
A little montage in honor of the doll began to play in my head.
一段纪念娃娃的小蒙太奇开始在我的脑海中浮现。
There he was being tossed across the adoption center by Jenny.
在那里，他被珍妮扔过收养中心。
There was the time Carla had accidentally rocked on him with rocking chair, and a crowd gasping as he tumbled onto a marble floor.
有一次，卡拉不小心用摇椅摇晃了他，当他跌倒在大理石地板上时，人群喘息着。
It had never occurred to me before, but I loved Nubbins.
我以前从未想到过，但我喜欢纳宾斯。
And if I sold baby Nubbins, what it meant was just too depressing.
如果我卖掉了小纳宾斯，这意味着太令人沮丧了。
I mean, after all the weird comments from our customers about our baby inventory, I still didn't want to face what it said if a factory reject monster baby was adopted before a whole nursery of perfectly cute black babies.
我的意思是，在我们的客户对我们的婴儿库存提出了所有奇怪的评论之后，我仍然不想面对如果在整个托儿所里养满可爱的黑人婴儿之前收养一个工厂拒绝的怪物婴儿的话。
I tried to think of ways to prevent this.
我试图想办法来防止这种情况发生。
I thought about lying and telling them Nubbins had already been purchased.
我想过撒谎并告诉他们纳宾斯已经被购买了。
I even thought about buying Nubbins myself.
我什至想过自己买Nubbins。
I imagined what I'd say to my dad when I called him to borrow the $120.
我想象着当我打电话给我爸爸借 120 美元时我会对他说什么。
Um, dad, there was this baby at the adoption center, and he was about to go to a bad family, and I think that I could be a good family.
嗯，爸爸，收养中心有一个孩子，他即将去一个坏家庭，我想我可以成为一个好家庭。
And then I looked up.
然后我抬起头。
The woman and her daughter had returned with their receipt.
那位女士和她的女儿带着收据回来了。
Reluctantly, I placed baby Nubbins in the little girl's arms.
我不情愿地把小纳宾斯放在小女孩的怀里。
I'm sure baby Veronica will have a wonderful home, I lied.
我确信维罗妮卡宝宝会有一个美好的家，我撒了谎。
As she and her mother walked out of the store, I watched Nubbins's head bobbing on her shoulder until I couldn't see them anymore.
当她和她母亲走出商店时，我看着纳宾斯的头在她的肩膀上晃动，直到我再也看不见他们了。
Elna Baker performs her stories on stage around New York City, and she has a book coming out, The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance, a Memoir .
埃尔娜·贝克在纽约市各地的舞台上表演她的故事，她的一本书即将出版，《纽约地区摩门教单身万圣节舞蹈回忆录》。
Well, our program was produced today by Jane Feltes with our senior producer Julie Snyder, and with Alex Blumberg, John Jeter, Sarah Koenig, Lisa Pollack, Robyn Semien, Alissa Shipp, and Nancy Updike.
今天我们的节目由 Jane Feltes 与我们的高级制片人 Julie Snyder 以及 Alex Blumberg、John Jeter、Sarah Koenig、Lisa Pollack、Robyn Semien、Alissa Shipp 和 Nancy Updike 共同制作。
Adrianne Mathiowetz runs our website.
阿德琳娜·马修韦茨 (Adrianne Mathiowetz) 负责运营我们的网站。
Production help from Seth Lind and Emily Youssef.
Seth Lind 和 Emily Youssef 为制作提供帮助。
[FUNDING CREDITS] This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
[资金来源]《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
WBEZ management oversight for a program by our boss Mr. Torey Malatia who is always stopping me in the hallway to share his feelings about me.
WBEZ 管理层对我们老板 Torey Malatia 先生的一个项目进行了监督，他总是在走廊里拦住我，分享他对我的感受。
If it was possible, I will take your hair on my head."
如果可以的话，我会把你的头发扎在我头上。”
I'm Ira Glass, back next week with more stories of This American Life .
我是艾拉·格拉斯，下周回来，带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。