187: Father's Day '01 - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #187 | June 15, 2001 187: Father's Day '01 Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 187 集 | 2001 年 6 月 15 日 187：父亲节 '01 注：《This American Life》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
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如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
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Prologue Ira Glass From WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life .
序言 来自 WBEZ 芝加哥和国际公共广播电台的 Ira Glass，这就是美国生活。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Father's Day is here.
父亲节到了。
I was about 9 or 10, and my parents were splitting up.
我大约九岁或十岁，我的父母正在分居。
And we lived in a very small rural town in North Dakota.
我们住在北达科他州的一个非常小的乡村小镇。
And my dad, he left.
而我的父亲，他离开了。
And he left the house and he got an apartment in a city.
他离开了房子，在城市里找到了一套公寓。
And he's a farmer.
他是一个农民。
To go and see him somewhere where there was no lawn, or pets, or field, or trees, it was just that, in itself, was strange.
去一个没有草坪、没有宠物、没有田野、没有树木的地方看他，这本身就很奇怪。
Plus the fact that he was there alone.
再加上他独自一人在那里。
The first time Leah and her sister and brother saw their dad's apartment after their parents separated, they were uncomfortable.
父母分居后，利亚和她的姐姐和弟弟第一次看到父亲的公寓时，感到很不舒服。
The whole separation made them uncomfortable.
整个分离让他们感到不舒服。
They hadn't seen him in weeks.
他们已经好几个星期没见到他了。
And then there was the apartment itself.
然后是公寓本身。
We went up the stairs and it was a three flat behind the grocery store, across from the library.
我们走上楼梯，看到杂货店后面、图书馆对面有一套三层公寓。
You know, it had that apartment smell of like cabbage in the hallway.
你知道，公寓走廊里有一股卷心菜的味道。
And then, we went in and it was like a living room, and then a kitchen, and then a bathroom.
然后，我们进去，它就像一个客厅，然后是厨房，然后是浴室。
And I remember I was like, wait, where's the bedroom?
我记得我当时想，等等，卧室在哪里？
And he's like, that's the great part.
他说，这就是最棒的部分。
You know, this is the cool part.
你知道，这是最酷的部分。
See those doors, go open the doors.
看到那些门，去开门。
And I went over and opened the doors and there's just like metal frame.
我走过去打开门，里面就像金属框架一样。
And that's the bed.
那就是床。
And it's called a Murphy bed.
它被称为墨菲床。
I'd never seen one before.
我以前从未见过。
He said, you pull it down.
他说，你拉下来吧。
Pull it down.
把它拉下来。
And I pulled it down and it made this really awful noise, kind of creaked like, errr.
我把它拉下来，它发出了非常可怕的噪音，有点吱吱作响，呃。
Like it needed to be oiled.
就像需要上油一样。
And I hated seeing it.
我讨厌看到它。
It was like a lumpy mattress at there was a thin blanket on it.
就像一个凹凸不平的床垫，上面盖着一条薄毯子。
It just didn't look like it was very good quality or comfortable.
它看起来质量不太好，也不舒服。
And we would sit on it sometimes to watch TV.
有时我们会坐在上面看电视。
And I remember just thinking, this is so weird to sit on a bed and watch TV.
我记得我只是想，坐在床上看电视真是太奇怪了。
It seemed really pathetic and lonely.
看起来真的很可怜又孤独。
And it's lonely and depressing anyway because you know your parents are splitting up.
无论如何，这都是孤独和沮丧的，因为你知道你的父母正在分手。
But then to see what your dad is living and it's not nice.
但后来看看你爸爸过着怎样的生活，这可不太好。
It was so incongruous with who I knew him to be.
这与我所认识的他是如此不相称。
I mean he's someone who belongs outside, working outside, animals, pets, agriculture, all of that.
我的意思是他是一个属于外面的人，在外面工作，动物，宠物，农业，所有这些。
And here he is in this apartment.
他就在这间公寓里。
I even hated the word "apartment" for a while.
我什至有一段时间讨厌“公寓”这个词。
I remember, like seeing it in books or reading it somewhere in the newspaper and being like, "Ugh, apartment.
我记得，就像在书上看到它或在报纸上读到它一样，“呃，公寓。
My dad lives in an apartment." I was really bothered by that.
我爸爸住在公寓里。”我真的很烦恼。
Was that the first time you saw him so vulnerable?
你是第一次看到他如此脆弱吗？
Yeah.
是的。
I mean, he'd always been-- my horse used to get out, escape, and like run down the road for miles.
我的意思是，他一直都是——我的马常常跑出去、逃跑，就像沿着路跑了几英里。
And I wouldn't know what to do.
我不知道该怎么办。
And my dad would just calmly get in the car and go drive.
我爸爸就会平静地上车去开车。
And find him in the bean field and lead him back.
并在豆地找到他并带他回来。
I mean, he was my-- who else could do that?
我的意思是，他是我的——还有谁能做到这一点？
But here he is in this apartment.
但他现在就在这间公寓里。
And yet, he seemed kind of cowed by it.
然而，他似乎对此感到有点害怕。
The walls closed in on him.
墙壁将他围住。
So I saw him as just being kind of helpless.
所以我觉得他只是有点无助。
As the years went on, did he resume his full size, or did he stay more like the picture that you had in that apartment?
随着时间的推移，他是否恢复了原来的身材，还是更像你在那间公寓里的照片？
No, that image was kind of-- he never regained the stature.
不，那个形象有点——他再也没有恢复过那种地位。
He never regained the stature that he had before that moment and before that year that he lived there.
他再也没有恢复在那一刻之前以及他住在那里的那一年之前的地位。
Leah was nine.
莉亚九岁。
She says that if her parents hadn't split up, she probably would have had two or three more years where she would have kept her dad on that pedestal.
她说，如果她的父母没有离婚，她可能还会有两三年的时间让她的父亲保持在那个地位。
Before adolescence would have hit and he would've come down to size anyway.
在青春期到来之前，他无论如何都会瘦下来。
Your father gets knocked off the pedestal.
你父亲被从神坛上摔下来了。
And that would have happened if they had gotten divorced or not.
无论他们是否离婚，这种情况都会发生。
But it was more jarring the way that it happened.
但事情发生的方式更令人震惊。
Do you regret that you lost those years of idealizing him, or do you think in the end it doesn't really matter?
你是否后悔失去了那些年将他理想化的机会，或者你认为最终这并不重要？
I think it matters.
我认为这很重要。
I think that it really-- it was so painful and we were so young.
我认为这真的——太痛苦了，而且我们还太年轻。
You don't need that.
你不需要那个。
Yeah, to make a difference, you need a few more years.
是的，要有所作为，你还需要几年的时间。
You need to have it come to you on your own terms.
你需要让它按照你自己的条件来找你。
I don't think that it's good when it happens in a way that you don't control.
我认为当事情以你无法控制的方式发生时，这不是一件好事。
And the way that it came about for me wasn't really natural.
而它对我来说并不是很自然。
It was very shocking.
非常震撼。
It was like one day he was there and two weeks later he definitely was not there.
就好像有一天他在那儿，两周后他肯定不在那儿了。
Here's the story of everyone and their dad.
这是每个人和他们父亲的故事。
Once, dad was on a pedestal.
曾经，爸爸是一个高高在上的人。
Then we got older and he came off the pedestal.
后来我们长大了，他也从神坛上下来了。
And with some dads, that happens more or less, gracefully.
对于一些父亲来说，这种情况或多或少会优雅地发生。
With others, it is a quick, painful crash from which none of the participants ever recovers fully.
对于其他人来说，这是一次快速而痛苦的崩溃，没有一个参与者能够完全恢复过来。
And how a father manages that descent from power, that transition to being human sized with his children, man, that is a test.
一个父亲如何处理权力的下降，如何与他的孩子一起过渡到人类的大小，伙计，这是一个考验。
That is really a test.
这确实是一个考验。
And a lot of really decent guys have a hard time with it.
很多真正正派的人都很难适应这一点。
Today on our radio program, we bring you three stories of fathers handling their falls off the pedestal as best they can.
今天，在我们的广播节目中，我们为您带来三个父亲们尽力处理从神坛上跌落的故事。
Act One of our show, Driving the Divorce Mobile.
我们的节目第一幕，驾驶离婚手机。
What happens if your dad goes from hero to tooling around in a Corvette and honking at girls in one month.
如果你的父亲在一个月内从英雄变成开着克尔维特四处奔走并对女孩们按喇叭，会发生什么？
Act Two, And if that Diamond Ring Don't Shine.
第二幕，如果钻石戒指不发光。
Ian Brown explains the lengths a normal dad will go through to try to do right by his daughter on her birthday.
伊恩·布朗 (Ian Brown) 解释了一个普通的父亲为了在女儿生日那天为她做正确的事会付出多少努力。
And how this innocent wish led him and his wife to the most corrupt and most questionable birthday stunt they, or any of their friends, had ever heard of.
这个无辜的愿望如何导致他和他的妻子做出他们或他们的任何朋友所听说过的最腐败和最可疑的生日噱头。
Act Three, Legend of a Bankrobber's Son.
第三幕，银行强盗儿子的传奇。
What if your dad was never on a pedestal to start with?
如果你的父亲从一开始就没有受人尊敬怎么办？
And yet, you find yourself still, somehow imitating him?
然而，你发现自己仍然在某种程度上模仿他？
Answers, stay with us.
答案，请留在我们身边。
Kids whose parents divorce, like Leah, are often forced to see their parents as human size, all of a sudden, way before they want to.
父母离婚的孩子，比如利亚，常常被迫突然将父母视为人类的大小，远远早于他们的意愿。
And if there is a separate culture in this country of divorce kids, this story is at the heart of its oral tradition.
如果这个离婚孩子的国家有一种独立的文化，那么这个故事就是其口头传统的核心。
This story is swapped like trading cards.
这个故事就像交易卡一样被交换。
This story of parents and how they acted in those first few months after they split up.
这个故事讲述了父母的故事，以及他们在分手后最初几个月的表现。
Those first few months when they were perfectly flawed human beings.
最初几个月，他们是完全有缺陷的人。
And to start our show today, we've collected a few about fathers right after the divorce.
为了开始今天的节目，我们收集了一些关于离婚后父亲的信息。
Our dad would take my brother and I out on Sundays, like every Sunday.
我们的爸爸会在周日带我和我的兄弟出去，就像每个周日一样。
And this one time he took us out and he wouldn't tell us where we were going until we pulled up to this shopping mall that had this fair going on.
有一次他带我们出去，直到我们把车停到正在举办博览会的购物中心时，他才告诉我们要去哪里。
And so I just remember seeing all the rides and you hear the music of the fair.
所以我只记得看到了所有的游乐设施，并且听到了博览会的音乐。
We're so excited.
我们很兴奋。
And he went to the ticket booth and he bought a big wad of tickets.
他去了售票亭，买了一大叠票。
And we just knew this was going to be a great day.
我们知道这将是美好的一天。
And the first ride we went on was this airplane ride where you go around in a circle in an airplane.
我们第一次乘坐飞机是乘坐飞机绕一圈。
And you could go up and down and you had a gun.
你可以上下移动并且你有一把枪。
You could fire the gun.
你可以开枪。
It would make this noise.
它会发出这种噪音。
And I remember, like every time we would circle-- our dad was watching us as we'd circle around.
我记得，就像每次我们绕圈时一样，当我们绕圈时，我们的父亲正在看着我们。
And every time we'd go around, we'd pull the stick shift so we would rise up just as we passed our dad to show off in front of him.
每次我们绕圈时，我们都会拉动变速杆，这样我们就会在经过父亲面前在他面前炫耀时站起来。
And my dad would wave to us as we would go by.
当我们经过时，我父亲会向我们挥手。
It was a really nice moment.
这真是一个美好的时刻。
And then, I think probably on the third or fourth time around we noticed he started talking to this guy beside him.
然后，我想可能是在第三次或第四次时，我们注意到他开始与他旁边的这个人说话。
And we were like wondering, who's that guy that dad's talking to?
我们想知道，爸爸正在和谁说话？
And then the next time around they were closer together and we were like wondering, who is this guy?
然后下一次他们靠得更近了，我们想知道这个人是谁？
What's going on?
这是怎么回事？
And then the next time around, the next thing we know this guy's got my dad kind of like in a headlock or he's just got my dad's shirt pulled up over his back.
然后下一次，我们知道这个家伙就像是用头锁住了我父亲的头，或者他只是把我父亲的衬衫拉到了他的背上。
He's like wrestling him and trying to punch him.
他就像与他摔跤并试图殴打他。
My brother and I are in shock.
我和我的兄弟都很震惊。
And so we kept going around.
所以我们继续四处走动。
And like instead of pulling on the stick shift, we were just frozen.
就像我们没有拉动变速杆一样，只是被冻住了。
We were constantly in the air circling around.
我们不断地在空中盘旋。
And by now, a whole crowd had gathered.
而此时，已经聚集了一大群人。
And they're kind of egging everyone on.
他们有点怂恿每个人。
Like hit him, hit him.
就像打他一样，打他。
And I guess the one image that stays in my mind is seeing my dad's exposed pale, white back because his shirt was up around his shoulders.
我想我脑海中残留的一个画面就是看到我父亲露出苍白的后背，因为他的衬衫披在肩膀上。
And finally when the ride had ended we jumped out of the plane and ran over to my dad.
最后，当旅程结束时，我们跳下飞机，跑到我爸爸身边。
By then I think the crowd had separated the two of them.
我想那时人群已经把他们两个分开了。
I remember this lady coming up to my dad saying, oh, you should have punched him.
我记得这位女士走到我爸爸面前说，哦，你应该打他。
You should have hit him in the face.
你应该打他的脸。
And my dad was like, oh, you kids want to go on some more rides?
我爸爸说，哦，你们孩子想再玩几次吗？
And he took us over to this other ride and says, oh, here.
他带我们去另一个游乐设施并说，哦，在这里。
Take some tickets.
拿一些票。
And we were just like, I want to go home now.
我们当时就想，我现在想回家了。
And just kind of put a damper on the day.
就是给这一天降温。
From what my dad was telling us, he said, oh, I think that guy was drunk or something.
根据我父亲告诉我们的内容，他说，哦，我认为那家伙喝醉了或者什么的。
He thought I was calling him names while we were on the ride.
他以为我们在路上的时候我在骂他。
He tried to, I guess, have a moral lesson out of it once we got back into the car.
我想，当我们回到车上时，他试图从中吸取道德教训。
And he was saying, fighting is not the answer kind of thing.
他说，战斗并不是解决问题的办法。
Always count to 10.
永远数到10。
But I think by the time you get to eight, your shirt's already off your back.
但我想当你到了八点的时候，你的衬衫已经脱掉了。
What are you going to do?
你会怎样做？
When I think of my father pre-divorce, I think of a very kind of dry, retiring, very British kind of man.
当我想起离婚前的父亲时，我想到的是一个非常枯燥、隐居、非常英国式的男人。
Everything he did was very measured, very calm.
他所做的一切都非常有分寸，非常冷静。
We're talking about a guy who made muzak his kind of personal soundtrack.
我们正在谈论一个将穆扎克作为他个人配乐的人。
He found this radio station out of Vermont that played muzak all day and he kind of wandered around humming.
他发现佛蒙特州的这个广播电台整天播放穆扎克音乐，他就哼着歌到处闲逛。
And so I'd hear him wandering around the house-- [HUMMING "THE GIRL FROM IPANEMA"]
所以我会听到他在房子里闲逛——[哼着“来自伊帕内玛的女孩”]
But once my parents got divorced, he joined the Y.
但我父母离婚后，他加入了Y。
He started working out religiously.
他开始虔诚地锻炼。
And suddenly he was saying incredibly bizarre things like, you know, I'm going to the gym and I'm going to wail on my pecs.
突然间，他说了一些令人难以置信的奇怪的话，比如，你知道，我要去健身房，我会因为我的胸肌而哭泣。
When he was first divorced, he didn't really have a place to live.
刚离婚的时候，他确实没有地方住。
It was kind of a hasty divorce.
这是一次仓促的离婚。
And so he was having us live in his office.
所以他让我们住在他的办公室里。
And we just visited him on the weekends.
我们只是在周末去看望他。
And his office consisted of this sort of psychedelic blue couch.
他的办公室里有一张迷幻的蓝色沙发。
And of course, the shaggy rug.
当然，还有毛茸茸的地毯。
And unfortunately, no bathroom.
不幸的是，没有浴室。
So he would actually get me to go to the bathroom with him on the roof into a Coke bottle.
所以他实际上会让我和他在屋顶上的可乐瓶里一起去洗手间。
And somehow he made this fun to go out into the roof and practice my aim.
不知何故，他让我到屋顶上练习瞄准变得很有趣。
It actually became like a fun thing to do that I actually look forward to during the day.
这实际上变成了一件有趣的事情，我在白天真的很期待。
And I have to really give him credit for that.
我必须为此给予他真正的信任。
He was always insisting on showing me this non-existent muscle growth.
他总是坚持向我展示这种不存在的肌肉生长。
I'd be sitting watching TV and I could hear him thundering down the stairs and, "Jamie!" Sure enough, I'd go out and there at the bottom of the stairs he'd be naked, flexing like this divorcee pumping-iron Arnold Schwarzenegger.
我坐在那儿看电视，我能听到他雷鸣般地走下楼梯，“杰米！”果然，当我出去时，他会在楼梯底部赤身裸体，像离婚的打铁阿诺·施瓦辛格一样弯曲。
He'd want me to grab his biceps to see how they were growing.
他希望我抓住他的二头肌，看看它们的生长情况。
It was just absolutely horrible.
这真是太可怕了。
I moved in with him when I was about 10 years old.
我大约10岁时就搬去和他住在一起。
I wasn't used to certain habits of his and one of them was where he would sit in the living room with a hairdryer on this head, completely naked.
我不习惯他的某些习惯，其中之一就是他会坐在客厅里，头上顶着吹风机，一丝不挂。
And it's surreal enough to see your father under a hairdryer.
看到你的父亲在吹风机下，这已经足够超现实了。
I mean, I'm talking like the old ones from the '50s.
我的意思是，我说的话就像 50 年代的老人们一样。
And I remember bringing over this friend of mine and we walk in and my dad's completely naked.
我记得我带了一个朋友过来，我们走进去，我爸爸完全赤身裸体。
And then we decide to just leave.
然后我们决定离开。
And as we're leaving, my dad says, well, you guys going to go out and boogie tonight?
当我们离开时，我爸爸说，好吧，你们今晚要出去跳舞吗？
Anyway, he's still in this kind of single-- he thought I was a single guy too.
不管怎样，他还是单身——他以为我也是单身。
And of course, he started dating.
当然，他开始约会。
And he'd tell me about these women.
他会告诉我关于这些女人的事。
And he always insisted on calling them madame.
而且他一直坚持称呼他们为夫人。
There was Madame Farago and Madame Hardaway and Madame Wilson.
有法拉戈夫人、哈达威夫人和威尔逊夫人。
And we never met any of these women, so they're like these phantom madames that I presume existed, but it was difficult.
我们从未见过这些女人，所以她们就像我认为存在的幽灵夫人，但这很困难。
Because you're embarrassed of your father anyways.
因为无论如何你都为你的父亲感到尴尬。
They're embarrassing.
他们很尴尬。
It's your dad.
是你爸爸。
And then here he is gunning the Corvette at a light to impress a girl.
然后他在灯光下开着克尔维特来给一个女孩留下深刻的印象。
And there you are, 10 years old, in this popsicle-colored green Corvette that's rusted and has a hole in the floor.
你就在那里，10 岁了，开着这辆冰棒色的绿色克尔维特，它生锈了，地板上有一个洞。
We talked to a half dozen dads about all this and we discovered that for the most part, they did not have specific memories of moments when they realized that their kids were seeing them differently.
我们与六位父亲谈论了这一切，我们发现，在大多数情况下，他们对于意识到孩子以不同的方式看待他们的时刻没有具体的记忆。
Maybe the kids notice because for a child, any kind of change from what they're used to is huge.
也许孩子们会注意到，因为对于孩子来说，任何与他们习惯的改变都是巨大的。
Or maybe, it's just that the dads, understandably, wanted to believe that they were not diminished in their children's eyes and didn't let themselves notice a change.
或者，也许，这只是爸爸们想要相信自己在孩子眼中并没有被削弱，也不让自己注意到变化，这是可以理解的。
Occasionally, a dad told us a story like this one.
偶尔，一位父亲给我们讲过这样的故事。
I call the boys every day and talk about whatever.
我每天都会给孩子们打电话，谈论任何事情。
How their day was.
他们的日子过得怎么样。
And one day I was on the phone with my eight year old, Alex.
有一天，我和我八岁的孩子亚历克斯通电话。
So we were having a conversation and there was a lull in the conversation.
所以我们正在交谈，谈话中出现了平静。
And then I sighed.
然后我叹了口气。
I just went, ah, like that.
我就这样去了，啊，就这样。
And then he just asked me, lonely?
然后他就问我，孤独吗？
I almost started to cry.
我几乎要哭了。
I was so taken aback by his perception.
我对他的看法感到非常惊讶。
And I was honest.
我很诚实。
I said yeah, when you go aren't around I'm lonely.
我说是啊，你不在的时候我很孤独。
But even in this case, this dad didn't really think that his kids saw him that differently since the divorce.
但即使在这种情况下，这位父亲也并不认为离婚后他的孩子们对他的看法有所不同。
Since seeing him so vulnerable.
自从看到他如此脆弱。
Since seeing him cry.
自从看到他哭了。
One dad who did notice a change in his kid was Brian Masters in Wichita.
威奇托的布莱恩·马斯特斯 (Brian Masters) 是一位确实注意到孩子发生变化的父亲。
Since he and his wife split up eight months ago, his young son started looking out for him.
自从八个月前他和妻子分手后，他的小儿子就开始照顾他。
Taking care of him in ways he never had before the divorce.
以离婚前从未有过的方式照顾他。
Probably the first thing that he started doing was helping me clean up, grabbing the Swiffer and going and doing the hardwood floors.
他开始做的第一件事可能就是帮我打扫卫生，拿起 Swiffer 去清理硬木地板。
And sweeping the porch.
并打扫门廊。
And going around and opening up windows to kind of freshen the place up.
四处走走，打开窗户，让这个地方焕然一新。
And you know, just sort of some of the kinds of things that you don't think of a kid even having on their radar screen.
你知道，有些东西是你认为小孩子的雷达屏幕上不会有的。
What else would he do to try to be the responsible one around the house?
他还会做些什么来努力成为家里的负责任的人呢？
He kind of runs through this little checklist on our way out the door.
在我们出门的路上，他大致浏览了一下这个小清单。
Do you have your cellphone?
你有手机吗？
Did you turn off the oven?
你关掉烤箱了吗？
Is the back door locked?
后门锁了吗？
You know, little litany of things that he knows I'm going to be worried about later.
你知道，他知道我以后会担心一连串的事情。
Isn't it?
不是吗？
Oh, I know.
哦，我知道。
I would love it if that only made me happy.
如果这能让我快乐，我会很高兴。
The fact is, it also makes me a little bit sad.
事实是，这也让我有点难过。
Because?
因为？
Brian Masters Well, because no kid should be in that position.
布莱恩·马斯特斯 好吧，因为任何孩子都不应该处于那个位置。
Kids should get to be kids.
孩子就应该有孩子的样子。
Not in the specific.
不在具体。
But especially in the early going, Marshall would-- say we'd be sitting at a coffee shop and he'd be doing his homework and I'd be reading a magazine.
但尤其是在早期，马歇尔会说我们会坐在一家咖啡店，他会做作业，我会读一本杂志。
And he'd look across the room and kind of nudge me and say, she's really pretty.
他会环视整个房间，然后轻轻推我一下，说，她真的很漂亮。
I bet she's a good cook.
我敢打赌她一定是个好厨师。
I love how the second sentence after she's really pretty is she's a good cook.
我喜欢她很漂亮之后的第二句话，她是个好厨师。
Did you have to learn new things to cook after your wife left?
妻子离开后，您是否需要学习新的烹饪方法？
I had to remember to cook.
我必须记得做饭。
You know, which was the hardest part in the darkest days, was just remembering that kids need to be fed just darn near every day for things to go well.
你知道，这是在最黑暗的日子里最困难的部分，就是记住孩子们需要每天都吃饱，事情才能顺利进行。
And occasionally, he would-- about 7:30, 8 o'clock at night he'd very casually say, you know what would be neat?
有时，他会——大约晚上 7:30、8 点，他会非常随意地说，你知道什么才算整洁吗？
Dinner.
晚餐。
See, one of the things that I've been thinking about is it's really hard for the child for their parent to be prematurely taken from them as the super person.
你看，我一直在思考的一件事是，对于孩子来说，他们的父母过早地被剥夺了作为超级人的地位，这对孩子来说真的很难。
But how hard is that for the dad?
但这对父亲来说有多难？
It's a terrible experience.
这是一次可怕的经历。
I mean, talk about a failure.
我的意思是，谈论失败。
And it was important to me to be able to legitimately reclaim some of that ground.
能够合法地夺回一些土地对我来说很重要。
Not just to appear to, but to actually reclaim some of that ground.
不仅是表面上，而且实际上是要夺回一些土地。
Absolutely.
绝对地。
Sure.
当然。
You know, those weren't proud moment in my life to realize that my kid had begun to look out for me.
你知道，当我意识到我的孩子开始照顾我时，我并不感到自豪。
That my kid had begun to become aware of the chinks in my armor.
我的孩子开始意识到我盔甲上的缝隙。
Well, I won't be doing anything with Marshall.
好吧，我不会和马歇尔做任何事。
Sunday is not one of the days that I get to spend with him.
周日不是我能和他一起度过的日子之一。
Unless we make some kind of a special arrangement to do so.
除非我们做出某种特殊安排来这样做。
And we haven't just yet, so I would suspect that Sunday will be a little poignant.
我们还没有这样做，所以我怀疑周日会有点令人心酸。
Because you'll be alone?
因为你会孤身一人？
Brian Masters Yeah.
布莱恩·马斯特斯 是的。
It will be interesting to see if Marshall figures this out and steps in.
看看马歇尔是否能解决这个问题并介入将会很有趣。
I'm hopeful that he will and on another level, I'm kind of hopeful that the whole thing slides passed him and that it isn't a concern for him.
我希望他会这么做，在另一个层面上，我有点希望整件事能过去他身边，这对他来说不是一个问题。
That would be strangely comforting to me.
这对我来说会是一种奇怪的安慰。
Why?
为什么？
Explain that.
解释一下。
Why that would be a sign that things were maybe healthier?
为什么这表明事情可能变得更健康了？
If that were to happen, it would be an indication that he is less aware of my loneliness and less aware of my frailty.
如果发生这种情况，就表明他不太意识到我的孤独，也不太意识到我的脆弱。
And a little less concerned about me.
对我的关心也少了一些。
Yeah.
是的。
Brian Masters That'd be a great problem to have.
布莱恩·马斯特斯：这将是一个很大的问题。
It'd be a great way to be alone on Sunday.
周日独自一人是一个很好的方式。
Thanks to all the kids and dads who talked to us.
感谢所有与我们交谈的孩子和爸爸。
[MUSIC- "MY DAD" BY PAUL PETERSEN]
[音乐-保罗·彼得森的《我的爸爸》]
Act Two, And if that Diamond Ring Don't Shine.
第二幕，如果钻石戒指不发光。
There are moments when a dad is tested.
有时候，父亲会受到考验。
And on this Father's Day, let us examine one of them.
在这个父亲节，让我们来看看其中之一。
A daughter's birthday.
女儿的生日。
Ian Brown is a writer and a radio host for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.
伊恩·布朗是加拿大广播公司的作家和电台主持人。
He has this story about what it means to be a dad who is merely human sized.
他有一个关于作为一个只有人类大小的父亲意味着什么的故事。
He recorded this at a This American Life show that we did in front of live audiences in Boston, Chicago, and Los Angeles.
他在我们在波士顿、芝加哥和洛杉矶的“This American Life”节目中在现场观众面前录制了这段视频。
No one arrives fashionably late for a seven year old's birthday party.
在七岁孩子的生日聚会上，没有人会时髦地迟到。
That offends rule one of parental life-- never waste free babysitting.
这冒犯了父母的生活准则之一——永远不要浪费免费的保姆服务。
But all seven guests at my daughter Haley's seventh birthday party weer dropped off by their parents mysteriously seven minutes early.
但我女儿海莉七岁生日聚会上的所有七位客人都神秘地提前七分钟被他们的父母送走了。
That sort of behavior is just plain rude.
这种行为简直是粗鲁无礼。
It was like being swarmed by a gang from planet tiny.
就像是被一群来自小行星的团伙包围了一样。
They drop their coats in the hall and immediately scattered to the farthest corners of the house, like some new, instantly contagious form of biological weapon.
他们把外套放在大厅里，然后立即分散到房子最远的角落，就像某种新型的、具有即时传染性的生物武器。
And I staggered upstairs with a small mountain of coats in my arms.
我怀里抱着一座小山，踉跄着上楼。
Which is not a chore I saw myself performing back when I was young and longing to be grown up.
当我年轻时渴望长大时，这并不是一件苦差事。
Even when I was 11, I wanted to be married.
甚至在我11岁的时候，我就想结婚。
Because married people, I knew, had sex every night of their lives.
因为我知道，已婚人士每天晚上都会发生性行为。
[LAUGHTER] But that's another story.
[笑声] 但那是另一个故事了。
I was lugging coats.
我拖着外套。
And back downstairs, Trish, the mother of Katie, Haley's best friend, two best friends ago, Trish shot me a knowing look.
回到楼下，特里西，凯蒂的母亲，海莉最好的朋友，两个最好的朋友，特里西给了我一个会心的眼神。
Magician, right?
魔术师吧？
How can you tell I said.
你怎么知道是我说的。
Fiber optic wands by the forks.
叉子旁的光纤棒。
And that was the first hint that my wife and I might have gone slightly over the top birthday-wise.
这是我和妻子在生日方面可能有点过分的第一个暗示。
That we might have stepped over the strict moral boundary that separates caring, thoughtful parents, who believe in personal attention and quality time, from cheese balls like us, who try to buy their way into their children's hearts.
我们可能已经跨越了严格的道德界限，这条界限将充满爱心、体贴的父母（他们相信个人关注和优质时间）与像我们这样的奶酪球（试图花钱进入孩子的内心）区分开来。
It's easy to commit that social gaffe these days.
如今，人们很容易犯社交失态。
My wife and I both work.
我和我妻子都工作。
The harder we work, the guiltier we feel.
我们越努力，就越感到内疚。
The more we want Haley's birthday parties to be-- well, visible from outer space would be gratifying.
我们越希望海莉的生日派对——好吧，从外太空可见就会令人高兴。
We'd been planning Haley's seventh birthday.
我们一直在计划海莉的七岁生日。
Or to be slightly more accurate, my wife Johanna had been planning it and I'd been doing nothing.
或者更准确地说，我的妻子约翰娜一直在计划这件事，而我却什么也没做。
For weeks.
持续数周。
What there was a cake or iced by professionals in the shape of a magician's top hat, which cost $30.
有一个蛋糕或者由专业人士冰镇成魔术师高顶帽子的形状，售价30美元。
Eight loot bags filled with thoughtful, age appropriate peanut free party favors at $15 a bag.
八个战利品袋，里面装满了贴心、适合年龄的无花生派对礼品，每袋售价 15 美元。
And of course, the magician himself, at $150 for 2 hours.
当然还有魔术师本人，2 小时 150 美元。
He called himself the Amazing Robert.
他称自己为“了不起的罗伯特”。
Now, I like to do something special on Haley's birthday.
现在，我喜欢在海莉的生日那天做一些特别的事情。
Still, don't you think, I said to my wife as she frantically tried to find a magician who wasn't booked three months in advance, don't you think we might be over amping?
不过，当我的妻子疯狂地寻找一位没有提前三个月预约的魔术师时，我对她说，你不觉得我们可能会过度扩张吗？
But honey, if we don't go slightly crazy, Johanna said quite logically, some other parent will.
但是亲爱的，如果我们不变得有点疯狂，约翰娜很合逻辑地说，其他一些家长会的。
Then what's Haley going to think?
那么海莉会怎么想呢？
And anyway, do you have a better idea?
不管怎样，你有更好的主意吗？
And I did not have a better idea.
我也没有更好的主意。
My sole contribution to the magician party had been to suggest that we include a whoopee cushion in every loot bag.
我对魔术师派对的唯一贡献是建议我们在每个战利品袋中加入一个欢呼垫。
Or at least it was my idea to blow them up and put them in the loot bags pre-inflated.
或者至少我的想法是炸毁它们并将它们放入预先充气的战利品袋中。
In the old days, when Haley was small, we kept her birthday simple.
以前，当海莉还小的时候，我们把她的生日安排得很简单。
I learned that lesson when I lived in Los Angeles near Beverly Hills.
当我住在洛杉矶比佛利山庄附近时，我学到了这个教训。
In Beverly Hills, parents like their children's birthday parties to have a theme.
在比佛利山庄，父母喜欢孩子的生日聚会有一个主题。
And a fairly significant theme at that.
这是一个相当重要的主题。
Manifest destiny say, or a NASA moon shot.
比如说，天定命运，或者美国宇航局的登月计划。
In LA, I never went to a birthday party that featured anything less than pony rides.
在洛杉矶，我从来没有参加过任何以骑小马为主题的生日聚会。
And one mother actually gave out Gucci t-shirts in the loot bags.
一位母亲实际上在战利品袋中分发了 Gucci T 恤。
It was hard to compete with that.
很难与之竞争。
In an act of defiance, a friend of ours, a struggling writer, staged her daughter's birthday in a park of all places.
我们的一位朋友，一位苦苦挣扎的作家，以一种反抗的行为，在各个公园里举办了她女儿的生日活动。
The kids had a good enough time.
孩子们玩得很开心。
They ran around and swung on swings and played tag.
他们跑来跑去，荡秋千，玩捉人游戏。
And generally reveled in a whole two hours when they weren't under the watchful eye of a nanny or armed response security.
当他们没有保姆或武装响应保安的监视时，通常会狂欢整整两个小时。
The grab bags contained what grab bags are supposed to contain, candy rather than Rolex watches.
抓包里装的是抓包里应该装的东西，糖果而不是劳力士手表。
And afterwards, the Beverly Hills parents flocked, I mean literally flocked round our friend.
之后，比佛利山庄的父母蜂拥而至，我的意思是真正聚集在我们的朋友周围。
Fabulous idea they said.
他们说这是一个绝妙的主意。
Nature, who would've thought?
大自然，谁会想到呢？
Can I steal the theme?
我可以盗主题吗？
But our friend Katharine is the queen of the less is more, easy on mummy birthday party.
但我们的朋友凯瑟琳是少即是多的女王，在妈妈生日派对上很轻松。
She says children want strong experiences, not new ones.
她说孩子们想要的是丰富的经历，而不是新的经历。
Which is why last weekend for her daughter Mary's seventh birthday, Katharine invited six girls over to string gummy bears onto extra long bamboo satay skewers.
这就是为什么上周末为女儿玛丽的七岁生日，凯瑟琳邀请六个女孩过来将小熊软糖串在超长的竹沙爹串上。
That was the theme of the party.
这就是晚会的主题。
Skewering candies on a stick.
将糖果串在棍子上。
There was some risk of eye injury and the entire gimmick seemed to have Freudian undertones.
存在一定的眼睛受伤风险，而且整个噱头似乎带有弗洛伊德的色彩。
The little girls kept saying, I'm going to stick this skewer up gummy's tiny butt.
小女孩们一直说，我要把这根串插在橡皮糖的小屁股上。
And giggling hysterically.
并歇斯底里地咯咯笑。
But all in all, it was a winner.
但总而言之，这是一个胜利者。
Only one girl barfed.
只有一个女孩呕吐了。
The entire party cost $15.
整个派对花费15美元。
Canadian.
加拿大人。
It is true that Katharine had a pinata.
凯瑟琳确实有一个皮纳塔。
Pinatas are excellent because they entail hitting an object violently with a stick.
皮纳塔非常出色，因为它们需要用棍子猛烈地击打物体。
But those were the old pre-bacchanalian birthdays.
但那些都是过去的酒神节前的生日。
By the time Haley turned five, the year of our most corrupt-- and therefore, most successful birthday-- we'd gone as low as a parent can go.
当海莉五岁那年，也就是我们最腐败的一年——因此也是最成功的生日——我们已经堕落到了父母所能达到的最低点。
We'd hired Human Barbie.
我们雇佣了人类芭比娃娃。
For $300 Human Barbie dressed up in full size versions of Barbie doll outfits and came to your house.
只需花费 300 美元，真人芭比就会穿着全尺寸的芭比娃娃服装来到您家。
Human Barbie arrived in a Dodge Grand Caravan with Human Midge, her assistant.
人类芭比和她的助手人类米吉乘坐一辆道奇大篷车抵达。
Two giant mobile racks of party dresses for the girls, a tea set in a case, and two chests of makeup.
两个巨大的可移动的女孩派对礼服架，一个装在箱子里的茶具，还有两个化妆品柜。
She dressed the kids, discussed the possibility of multiple careers, and fed them cake.
她给孩子们穿衣服，讨论多种职业的可能性，并给他们喂蛋糕。
All our friends were completely horrified.
我们所有的朋友都被吓坏了。
I might as well have said, oh, this year Haley's having a crack party.
我还不如说，哦，今年海莉举办了一场精彩的派对。
We're having a cake made of crack too.
我们也有一个用裂纹做的蛋糕。
My Canadian friends put this crassness down to the fact that Johanna, my wife, is an American.
我的加拿大朋友将这种粗鲁归咎于我的妻子约翰娜是美国人。
But successful?
但成功了吗？
Well, it was as if the Dalai Lama had made a stop at our house.
嗯，就好像达赖喇嘛在我们家停留过一样。
The girls were hypnotized with awe.
女孩们被敬畏催眠了。
They spent most of the afternoon standing in a circle brushing human Barbie's hair.
他们整个下午的大部分时间都站成一圈，为芭比娃娃梳理头发。
I had the feeling that secretly, quite a few mum's wouldn't have minded giving it a try themselves.
我私下里有一种感觉，不少妈妈不介意自己尝试一下。
As it turned out, I needn't have worried about the Amazing Robert, the magician, either.
事实证明，我也不必担心神奇的罗伯特魔术师。
He was a handsome guy with sideburns and a rye, if somewhat resigned manner.
他是个英俊的小伙子，留着鬓角，一头黑麦头发，虽然态度有些听天由命。
He knew what he was doing though.
但他知道自己在做什么。
He started cracking jokes with the kids right away.
他立刻开始和孩子们开玩笑。
You must be Haley he said to one of the boys as he walked through the door.
你一定是海莉，他走进门时对其中一个男孩说。
No, Peter said.
不，彼得说。
I'm a boy and clapped his hands.
我是个男孩，拍了拍手。
Hey, the magician said.
嘿，魔术师说。
No clapping.
没有鼓掌。
So all the kids clapped.
于是所有的孩子都鼓起掌来。
I said no clapping.
我说不鼓掌。
By the time he started pulling eggs out of their noses, they were goners.
当他开始从它们鼻子里取出蛋时，它们已经不见了。
I chose that moment to run upstairs.
我选择了那个时刻跑上楼。
I find I need a moment alone at regular intervals at these kiddie birthday bashes.
我发现我需要定期在这些孩子的生日聚会上独处一会儿。
Also at adult parties.
也在成人聚会上。
In fact, I could use a moment alone right about now.
事实上，我现在可以独处一会儿。
But when I open the door to my bedroom, what do I find?
但当我打开卧室的门时，我发现了什么？
Lying on my bed, surrounded by entire mountain ranges of miniature winter coats.
躺在我的床上，周围都是微型冬衣的山脉。
Two of my adult guests holding hands.
我的两位成年客人手牵手。
Their spouses were downstairs.
他们的配偶在楼下。
I must say they played it cool.
我必须说他们表现得很酷。
Headache, the woman said.
头痛，女人说。
Rubbing her temples.
揉揉太阳穴。
Not that I ask.
不是我问的。
Yeah, I said.
是的，我说。
These kids parties can be brutal.
这些儿童派对可能很残酷。
And I tell you, I left fast.
我告诉你，我离开得很快。
I didn't want to ask.
我不想问。
I certainly didn't want to now.
我现在当然不想。
And downstairs, the Amazing Robert was making cards disappear and reappear.
在楼下，神奇的罗伯特正在让卡片消失并重新出现。
But Trish, Katie's mom, she kept staring at the magician.
但凯蒂的妈妈崔西却一直盯着魔术师。
I thought she disapproved of his tricks.
我以为她不赞成他的把戏。
But then she gave a little shriek.
但随后她发出了一声轻微的尖叫。
I know, she said.
我知道，她说。
I knew I knew that magician.
我知道我认识那个魔术师。
He has just come through a terrible divorce from a birthday clown.
他刚刚经历了与生日小丑的可怕离婚。
Which pretty much says it all, doesn't it?
这几乎说明了一切，不是吗？
It's terrible getting older, the disappointments and the let-downs.
变老、失望和失望是可怕的。
But no child believes that.
但没有一个孩子相信这一点。
They want to get older.
他们想要变老。
If you're seven, you can't wait to be nine.
如果你七岁了，你就迫不及待地想要九岁了。
I mean, nine.
我的意思是，九个。
That it's going to be the greatest.
这将是最伟大的。
Because they think life just gets better and better and better the older you get.
因为他们认为随着年龄的增长，生活会变得越来越好。
And we grown-ups, we know better.
而我们成年人，我们更了解。
Or we think we do.
或者我们认为我们这样做。
Or at least we need to think we do.
或者至少我们需要认为我们做到了。
But I didn't have much time for such maudlin thought's.
但我没有太多时间思考这种伤感的想法。
Frankly, convoluted ones.
坦白说，很复杂。
Because I knew sound was wafting in from the living room.
因为我知道声音从客厅里传来。
A sound that is frankly, impossible to be maudlin about.
坦率地说，这种声音不可能让人伤感。
[WHOOPEE CUSHION SOUNDS] They'd found the loot bags.
[哇喔垫子的声音]他们找到了战利品袋。
Crass?
粗鲁？
Sure.
当然。
Cheesy?
俗气？
Absolutely.
绝对地。
Grown-up?
长大了？
Not at all.
一点也不。
That's what I liked about it.
这就是我喜欢它的原因。
Ian Brown is the author of Man, Medium Rare and Freewheeling.
伊恩·布朗 (Ian Brown) 是《Man》、《Medium Rare》和《Freewheeling》的作者。
And the host of a radio program called Talking Books on the CBC.
也是 CBC 广播节目“Talking Books”的主持人。
Coming up, more parental nudity.
即将到来，更多父母的裸体。
Very very, brief and very, very harmless parental nudity.
非常非常、简短、非常、非常无害的父母裸体。
Which is, frankly, the only way I can take it.
坦率地说，这是我能接受的唯一方法。
I don't know about you.
我不了解你。
That's in a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.
一分钟后，国际公共广播电台将继续我们的节目。
It's This American Life , I'm Ira Glass.
这就是美国生活，我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we chose some theme and bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
当然，每周我们的节目都会选择一些主题，并为您带来有关该主题的各种不同类型的故事。
Today's show for father's day, stories about dads who have been removed from the pedestal of paternal grandeur.
今天的父亲节节目，讲述了那些被从父亲的威严基座上拆下来的父亲们的故事。
Dads who are entirely human scale.
完全是人性化的爸爸。
We have arrived at act three of our show.
我们已经到了演出的第三幕了。
Act three, Legend of a Bankrobber's Son.
第三幕，银行强盗之子的传奇。
Nick Flynn's father deserted the family not long after Nick was born.
尼克·弗林的父亲在尼克出生后不久就抛弃了家庭。
Nick did not know him at all.
尼克根本不认识他。
His father was a check forger and a bankrobber.
他的父亲是一名支票伪造者和一名银行抢劫犯。
And for a brief period in the '70s, served some time for it.
并在 70 年代短暂的一段时间内，为之服务了一段时间。
Nick's mother, politically enough, worked for a bank.
尼克的母亲在政治上是在一家银行工作的。
And at one point, after they split up, saw the dad on a wanted poster.
有一次，他们分手后，在一张通缉海报上看到了父亲。
She brought it home and showed his brother saying, that's your dad.
她把它带回家给他哥哥看，说，那是你爸爸。
Eventually, under rather odd circumstances, Nick and his father met, and started to get to know each other.
最终，在相当奇怪的情况下，尼克和他的父亲见面了，并开始相互了解。
Nick Flynn tells this story.
尼克·弗林讲述了这个故事。
At a certain point, I think I had already heard about my father being in prison and I knew that he was an alcoholic.
在某个时刻，我想我已经听说过我父亲入狱的消息，而且我知道他是个酒鬼。
I was probably 15 or so.
我当时大概15岁左右。
I was actually drinking pretty heavily then also, and doing drugs.
事实上，我当时也酗酒，还吸毒。
And my mother got concerned about it.
我妈妈对此很担心。
I think she was afraid that I was just going to be like him.
我想她是担心我会变得像他一样。
It was probably very difficult for her to have me in the house.
对她来说，让我呆在家里可能很困难。
She'd made a choice to leave a relationship like that and now here I was, sort of becoming that person.
她选择离开这样的关系，而现在我就在这里，有点成为那个人。
I remember we were sitting in the living room of our house and she-- I'd probably come home one more night, like completely shattered.
我记得我们坐在家里的客厅里，她——我可能会再回家一晚，就像彻底崩溃了一样。
And I believe it was the next morning, like we woke up and she was just like, this isn't good.
我相信那是第二天早上，就像我们醒来一样，她就像，这不好。
She sat me down and said, what did I plan to do with my life?
她让我坐下来问，我的人生打算做什么？
At 15 I had no idea.
15岁时我还不知道。
We didn't have a lot of money growing up.
我们从小到大都没有很多钱。
My mother worked two or three jobs.
我的母亲打过两份或三份工作。
And things were tight.
事情很紧张。
I told her I planned to go into crime.
我告诉她我打算走上犯罪道路。
It seemed like a reasonable thing to think of doing.
这似乎是一件合理的事情。
That would be a way to get a lot of money fast.
这将是快速获得大量金钱的一种方式。
That was the career path I was considering.
这就是我正在考虑的职业道路。
But when I told her that she began to cry.
但当我告诉她这件事时，她开始哭了。
I could see tears well up in her eyes.
我可以看到她眼里涌出泪水。
I tried to sort of back peddle and explain that I'd do sort of white collar victimless crime.
我试图兜售并解释说我会做一些白领无受害者犯罪。
And then she just left the room.
然后她就离开了房间。
She just walked out of the room.
她刚走出房间。
Until I was 16, I think I'd seen him just two or three times.
在我 16 岁之前，我想我只见过他两三次。
I actually remember looking for him.
我确实记得找过他。
I remember thinking I would see him places because he had friends in Scituate, in my hometown.
我记得我想我会去看他，因为他在我的家乡锡土阿特有朋友。
But by that point, my mother had a warrant on him for nonpayment of child support.
但到那时，我母亲对他发出了不支付子女抚养费的逮捕令。
And then, when I was 16 was when my mother first showed me a letter that he sent.
然后，当我 16 岁的时候，我母亲第一次给我看了他寄来的一封信。
There's a lot of letters.
有很多信。
I spent a couple weeks a couple of years ago going through all the letters he had sent me, pulling them together.
几年前，我花了几周时间仔细阅读他寄给我的所有信件，并将它们整理在一起。
The first letter that I have is from 1976.
我收到的第一封信是 1976 年写的。
I just have written it's postmarked June 25.
我刚刚写了，邮戳日期是 6 月 25 日。
Signed dad.
签了爸爸。
And he regrets for forgetting the date of my birthday.
他很遗憾忘记了我的生日。
And then one of the lines in it is, "Tell me of yourself.
其中有一句是：“告诉我你自己吧。
I miss you both.
我想念你们俩。
And soon, very soon, I shall be known."
很快，很快，我就会被人知道。”
That "soon, very soon, I shall be known." One of the things about my father is that he identifies himself as a writer, as a poet.
“很快，很快，我就会被知道。”我父亲的一个特点是，他认为自己是一名作家、诗人。
He has a sense of grandiosity about himself and what his achievements, his place in the world.
他对自己、他的成就、他在世界上的地位有一种自大的感觉。
Often what he would do is he would take a letter from someone else and Xerox it, and then send it on to someone else.
通常他会做的是，他会收到别人的一封信并复印，然后将其发送给其他人。
Like he has a correspondence with Ted Kennedy.
就像他和特德·肯尼迪有书信往来一样。
He writes to him all the time.
他一直给他写信。
And being a senator, the senator, I think, just has someone who answers the letters for him.
作为一名参议员，我认为，参议员只是有人替他回信。
They'll often be that.
他们经常会这样。
Often he'll just sort of write something.
通常他只是写点东西。
Maybe a couple words and then there'd be maybe a Xeroxed letter from Ted Kennedy.
也许只说了几句话，然后就会有一封来自特德·肯尼迪的复印信。
I have one here.
我这里有一个。
I mean, I just got one.
我的意思是，我刚刚得到了一个。
Actually, the most recent.
其实是最近的。
I just got one a couple days ago.
我几天前刚拿到一张。
A letter from Ted Kennedy.
特德·肯尼迪的一封信。
The print is actually sort of falling apart because it's been Xeroxed so many times.
印刷品实际上有点散架了，因为它已经被复印了很多次。
"Dr Mr. Flynn, thank you for your recent correspondence advising me of your further views on critical issues facing us in Congress."
“弗林博士，感谢您最近的来信，告诉我您对国会面临的关键问题的进一步看法。”
It goes on, "Thank you again for writing."
继续说道：“再次感谢您的来信。”
These are some lines from a letter that I received from my father in 1995.
以下是 1995 年我从父亲那里收到的一封信中的一些内容。
"We must have one love, one great love in our life.
“我们一生中必须拥有一种爱，一种伟大的爱。
We are a nation of grunters.
我们是一个抱怨者的国家。
I fully intend to control Senator Kennedy's reelection.
我完全想控制肯尼迪参议员的连任。
He shall win and I shall be named the head of the American Arts Council.
他将获胜，我将被任命为美国艺术委员会主席。
It shall happen.
它将会发生。
I do hope you both are well and earn some solid pursuits of solid goals in life."
我真心希望你们俩都身体健康，并能在人生中实现一些坚实的追求和目标。”
And another letter from 1989.
还有一封 1989 年的信。
"I shall be able to do for American now what Mr. Solzhenitsyn has done for Russia.
“我现在将为美国做索尔仁尼琴先生为俄罗斯所做的事情。
My works are waiting.
我的作品正在等待。
It shall be soon.
很快就会的。
And this is from 1987.
这是1987年的事情。
"Writers, especially poets are particularly prone to madness.
“作家，尤其是诗人，特别容易发疯。
Whether you like it or not, you are me.
不管你喜欢与否，你都是我。
Eno the Beano tells me you are into drugs.
比诺伊诺告诉我你沉迷于毒品。
If so, good luck."
如果是这样，祝你好运。”
By the early '80s, he had been-- I knew he was out of jail.
到了 80 年代初，他——我知道他已经出狱了。
I knew he was out of federal prison.
我知道他已经出联邦监狱了。
And I knew he was driving a cab.
我知道他正在开出租车。
I think a taxi in Boston.
我想在波士顿打出租车。
I knew something about him, but I hadn't seen him probably for 10, 12 years.
我对他有所了解，但我可能已经有 10、12 年没见过他了。
And we finally did see each other.
我们终于见面了。
He got my phone number.
他得到了我的电话号码。
And at some point, I believe it was in 1987, he called me up and said he was getting evicted from the rooming house he was in.
我记得是在 1987 年的某个时候，他打电话给我，说他要被赶出他住的公寓了。
He wanted me to come over and to-- he knew I had a pickup truck somehow and he wanted me to come over and to move all his stuff out of the house and out of his apartment.
他想让我过来——他知道我不知何故有一辆皮卡车，他想让我过来把他所有的东西搬出房子和公寓。
This might have been the first time I ever talked to him.
这可能是我第一次和他说话。
When I was a kid I don't think I talked to him.
当我还是个孩子的时候，我想我没有和他说过话。
And then I'd gotten these letters from him, which I hadn't answered.
然后我收到了他的信，但我没有回复。
He was pretty drunk when he called.
他打电话的时候已经喝醉了。
He said that he was sitting behind his door with a shotgun waiting for the knob to turn.
他说他拿着一把猎枪坐在门后等待旋钮转动。
He wasn't going to let them take his stuff and he wasn't going to leave.
他不会让他们拿走他的东西，他也不会离开。
That I should get over there.
我应该去那里。
So I actually brought a couple other friends, just for witnesses.
所以我实际上还带来了其他几个朋友，只是为了见证人。
And so we got over there.
所以我们就到了那里。
We got there and it was sort of an amazing scene.
我们到达那里，那是一个令人惊叹的场景。
I knocked on his door and he said to come in.
我敲了敲他的门，他说进来吧。
I went in and he was sitting in a tin tub naked in the middle of his room having a bath.
我走进去，看到他赤身裸体地坐在房间中央的一个锡桶里洗澡。
And drinking vodka our of a silver challis.
喝着我们的银杯伏特加。
I'd never seen him before.
我以前从未见过他。
Then he stood up naked in front of me covered with water.
然后他浑身是水，赤身裸体地站在我面前。
And it was shocking.
这令人震惊。
It was a shocking scene.
这是令人震惊的一幕。
My friends and I stayed with him for maybe half an hour and I ended up giving him some money to put his stuff in storage.
我和我的朋友陪他呆了大约半个小时，最后我给了他一些钱来存放他的东西。
To hire a truck and to get a storage unit.
租一辆卡车并获得一个存储单元。
I gave him a few hundred dollars.
我给了他几百块钱。
And then we left.
然后我们就离开了。
And then he moved his stuff out.
然后他就把自己的东西搬了出去。
And then the next time I saw him was maybe a couple months later.
然后我下次见到他可能是几个月后了。
It was getting warmer.
天越来越暖和了。
I remember it was sort of a warm day.
我记得那是一个温暖的一天。
Like maybe April or something.
也许是四月之类的。
And I was riding my bike along the Charles River and he was sleeping on a bench on the Esplanade by the Charles River.
我沿着查尔斯河骑自行车，他睡在查尔斯河滨滨海艺术中心的长凳上。
I realized that at this point he was homeless.
我意识到此时他无家可归。
At that point, in 1987, I had been working with the homeless at a homeless shelter in Boston for three years.
1987 年，我已经在波士顿的一个无家可归者收容所为无家可归者工作了三年。
I'd been there for three years as a caseworker.
我在那里做了三年社会工作者。
I sort of had a sick feeling in my stomach that he would show up at the shelter where I worked.
想到他会出现在我工作的避难所，我心里有种不舒服的感觉。
After seeing him on the bench, probably within a month he ended up at the shelter.
在看到他坐在板凳上后，可能一个月之内他就来到了避难所。
One day in the afternoon he walked into the shelter and he announced loudly to everyone that his son worked there and that he needed a bed.
一天下午，他走进避难所，大声向大家宣布，他的儿子在那里工作，需要一张床。
And demanded a bed.
并要求一张床。
And then I came on for my shift later that day and the supervisor took me aside and told me what had happened.
那天晚些时候，我来值班，主管把我拉到一边，告诉我发生了什么事。
And asked me, he said that someone had come looking for a bed today that claimed to be my father.
又问我，他说今天有人来找床位，自称是我父亲。
And I was shocked.
我很震惊。
It was a secret.
这是一个秘密。
I didn't want people to know this.
我不想让人们知道这件事。
I'd probably tell people that he'd been in prison.
我可能会告诉人们他进过监狱。
That he was a writer.
他是一名作家。
That he was a failed writer.
他是一个失败的作家。
And all those things seemed actually sort of-- just seemed to add sort of a mystique.
所有这些事情实际上似乎只是增加了一种神秘感。
It's something you can just relate, like a good story.
这是你可以直接联系起来的东西，就像一个好故事。
But then, when he becomes homeless, it goes up to another level.
但当他无家可归时，情况就会上升到另一个水平。
I felt riddled with shame that this man was my father.
我为这个男人是我的父亲而感到羞愧。
Which was confusing for me because I had worked with the homeless for three years and I had a lot of compassion for homeless people.
这让我很困惑，因为我已经为无家可归者工作了三年，而且我对无家可归者充满同情心。
But when it happened to someone in my family, to happen to my father, I felt utter shame that people would look at me and judge in a certain way.
但当这件事发生在我家里的某个人身上，发生在我父亲身上时，我感到非常羞愧，因为人们会以某种方式看待我并做出判断。
Whether that I was going to end up like him.
我是否会像他一样结束。
That I was sort of crazy like him.
我和他一样有点疯狂。
Or why couldn't I help him?
或者说我为什么不能帮助他呢？
Why couldn't I do something?
为什么我不能做点什么？
You know, I was his family.
你知道，我是他的家人。
I lived in a place.
我住在一个地方。
Why didn't he live in my place?
他为什么不住在我那儿？
But then, I did not want him to be-- I had this sense that he had-- he hadn't really given me much in my life and now he was going to come and take away a job I had in some way.
但后来，我不希望他——我有这种感觉——他在我的生活中并没有真正给我太多，而现在他要来以某种方式夺走我的工作。
That he would come to my job and just sort of [BLEEP] that up.
他会来我的工作岗位，然后就[哔]了一声。
I wished he would go anywhere but where I worked.
我希望他能去任何地方，除了我工作的地方。
He did all right for a while.
有一段时间他表现得很好。
He got a job.
他找到了工作。
He was sort of a model homeless person.
他是一个模范无家可归者。
He had a day job at a labor pool.
他在劳动力池有一份全职工作。
He would have a bad held for him by someone else.
他可能会被别人替他保管。
I didn't have a lot of interaction with him.
我和他没有太多互动。
I remember him being in the lobby of the shelter and him coming in at night.
我记得他在避难所的大厅里，晚上才进来。
I would have radar for when he came in.
当他进来时我会有雷达。
I would know when he was there.
我会知道他什么时候在那里。
I would look over and see him go and get his bed ticket for the night.
我会去看他去拿当晚的床票。
I probably wouldn't say anything to him.
我大概不会对他说什么。
And then I would just sort of see him.
然后我就想见见他。
And I'd judge whether he seemed drunk or not.
我会判断他是否看起来喝醉了。
Whether he seemed like it was just going to be a smooth transition from the day into the night.
他看起来是否只是从白天到黑夜的平稳过渡。
Or if it wasn't.
或者如果不是的话。
Or if there was going to be a scene.
或者如果有一个场景。
And there were a few times I remember meeting him actually, after work.
我记得有几次在下班后确实见到了他。
At dawn when he was on his way to the labor pools to do work.
黎明时分，他正前往劳动力池干活。
And walking with him and talking.
并与他一起散步、交谈。
Actually, like outside the shelter.
事实上，就像在避难所外面一样。
Like walking along and trying to figure out what was going on with him.
就像一边走一边试图弄清楚他发生了什么事。
And I went back to the shelter recently this past winter for the first time.
去年冬天我第一次回到避难所。
And talked to a lot of people who-- and asked them, what they were thinking of this.
并与很多人交谈，并询问他们对此有何想法。
How we interacted.
我们如何互动。
What I seemed like.
我看起来像什么。
What they thought.
他们怎么想的。
And most people said that they were just utterly confused.
大多数人表示他们完全困惑。
That they had no idea really what to-- how to treat me, how to treat him.
他们真的不知道该怎么做——如何对待我，如何对待他。
And it seemed to them that I didn't want to talk about it.
他们觉得我不想谈论这件事。
I wouldn't really give them a way into a conversation about this.
我真的不会给他们机会谈论这个问题。
I was just sort of maybe too freaked out and I didn't know what to say.
我只是有点太害怕了，我不知道该说什么。
I really don't know what I was feeling.
我真的不知道我当时的感受是什么。
I think I was feeling awful.
我想我感觉很糟糕。
I was feeling confused and it seemed like a nightmare to me, actually.
我感到很困惑，实际上，这对我来说就像一场噩梦。
When my father showed up in 1987 in the shelter, I was actively drinking and using drugs.
1987 年，当我父亲出现在收容所时，我正在酗酒并吸毒。
From what I remember, my drug increase probably-- my drug intake, I imagine, increased.
根据我的记忆，我的药物可能增加了——我想我的药物摄入量增加了。
I had totaled three vehicles.
我总共有三辆车。
And all of them I had been drinking or doing drugs while I was driving.
所有这些人都是我在开车时喝酒或吸毒的。
At one point, I had a motorcycle accident while I was drunk.
有一次，我喝醉酒时发生了一场摩托车事故。
It's not a good idea to ride a motorcycle when you're drunk.
醉酒时骑摩托车不是一个好主意。
And ended up in the hospital, Lost my spleen.
最后进了医院，失去了我的脾脏。
I would drink and smoke marijuana.
我会喝酒和吸大麻。
You know, pretty much daily.
你知道，几乎每天都有。
I was sort of fitting a profile of someone who was on the way to some kind of ruin or something.
我有点符合一个正在走向某种毁灭之类的人的形象。
I looked at my father and he was 30 years older than me.
我看了看父亲，他比我大30岁。
He identified himself as a writer.
他自称是一名作家。
I identified myself as a writer.
我认定自己是一名作家。
He didn't take it seriously.
他没有认真对待。
He didn't take his situation seriously.
他没有认真对待自己的处境。
And maybe I didn't either at that point.
也许那时我也没有。
Somehow I was able to gain perspective by looking at him.
不知何故，我能够通过看着他获得视角。
And I'm not sure why I couldn't gain perspective by looking at all the other homeless guys that were there, and drinking and nose diving.
我不知道为什么我不能通过观察那里的所有其他无家可归的人、喝酒和潜水来获得视角。
But somehow looking at him and feeling like, OK, even though I don't know him as a father, there's some connection between us.
但不知何故，看着他，我感觉，好吧，尽管我不认识他这个父亲，但我们之间还是有某种联系的。
And if I keep going like I'm going, I'm going to end up like him.
如果我继续像现在这样，我最终也会像他一样。
It terrified me.
这让我害怕。
And after he'd been there for two years, I ended up getting into therapy and getting sober.
在他在那里呆了两年后，我最终接受了治疗并变得清醒。
And I think it actually has a lot to do with that, with seeing my father and seeing what could happen to someone's life.
我认为这实际上与此有很大关系，因为我看到了我的父亲，看到了某人的生活可能会发生什么。
I sort of had to see something that extreme I think to realize what a potential fate that I could end up in.
我必须看到一些我认为极端的事情才能意识到我最终可能会陷入什么样的命运。
He had it together enough to realize that when he turned 60 he was eligible for senior housing.
他充分意识到，当他年满 60 岁时，他就有资格获得高级住房。
And when he turned 60, he actually got an apartment in subsidized housing, section 8 housing.
当他60岁的时候，他实际上得到了一套补贴住房的公寓，即第8区住房。
I began filming him probably five years after that, like in middle of the '90s.
大约五年后，就像九十年代中期，我开始拍摄他。
As I had learned in the 90 days I had been there what would happen.
正如我在 90 天里所了解到的那样，会发生什么。
I would have looked like Toulouse Lautrec.
我会看起来像图卢兹劳特累克。
They'd have shot the balls off at the knees.
他们会把球射到膝盖处。
Not even higher.
甚至更高。
My proposal was that I was going to seek out and interview the men that had known my mother.
我的建议是，我要寻找并采访那些认识我母亲的人。
The men that had been in my mother's life, for a year, or for five years, or for however long.
这些男人已经在我母亲的生命中存在了一年，或者五年，或者无论多久。
And so the first time I really went to look for my father was with a video camera and I interviewed him.
所以我第一次真正去寻找我的父亲是带着摄像机采访了他。
Every time I'd go to him for the next three or four years, I'd bring a camera with me.
在接下来的三四年里，每次我去见他，我都会带着相机。
And just his story sort of kept coming.
他的故事不断涌现。
[UNINTELLIGIBLE], Lewisberg, Atlanta, Marion, Illinois, which was built to replace Alcatraz.
[无法理解]，路易斯伯格，亚特兰大，马里昂，伊利诺伊州，是为了取代恶魔岛而建造的。
I was there.
我当时就在那里。
And I had the pleasure.
我很高兴。
I mean, the pleasure speaking as Solzhenitsyn.
我的意思是，很高兴以索尔仁尼琴的身份发言。
I mean, I want to know what the [BLEEP] I was writing about.
我的意思是，我想知道我写的[BLEEP]是什么。
I was thinking, Jesus, Solzhenitsyn is going to jump with envy when he sees this [BLEEP] story.
我在想，天啊，当索尔仁尼琴看到这个[BLEEP]故事时，他一定会嫉妒得跳起来。
He and Dostoyevsky both wrote about their adventures in Russian prisons heavily.
他和陀思妥耶夫斯基都大量描写了他们在俄罗斯监狱中的冒险经历。
All he wanted to do was to give me his three step plan for how to rob a bank.
他只想告诉我他如何抢劫银行的三步计划。
Which seemed to be his version of fatherly advice.
这似乎是他父亲般的建议。
We had never spoken before and this was the first real conversation we had.
我们以前从未说过话，这是我们第一次真正的对话。
Was he laid out his method of robbing banks to me.
他是不是向我展示了他抢劫银行的方法？
Three steps in the whole program.
整个程序分三步。
Step one, open an account.
第一步，开立账户。
Open an account.
开设账户。
He sort of kept forgetting the steps also.
他也总是忘记步骤。
It involved getting someone to steal some checks from an insurance company and then to forge those checks.
它涉及让某人从保险公司窃取一些支票，然后伪造这些支票。
Make a whole series of forged checks.
制作一系列的伪造支票。
And then to open dummy bank accounts around the country.
然后在全国各地开设虚拟银行账户。
It was sort of elaborate.
这有点复杂。
Elaborate and convoluted.
详尽而复杂。
And ultimately, a failed enterprise.
最终，一个失败的企业。
Step one, I was given like a hundred $100 bills.
第一步，我收到了一百张 100 美元的钞票。
Well, [UNINTELLIGIBLE].
嗯，[无法理解]。
Driven to the bank by [UNINTELLIGIBLE].
被[无法辨认]开车去银行。
Go in with my story.
快来听听我的故事吧。
Always a female teller.
始终是女柜员。
Always go to a young female teller.
一定要去找年轻的女出纳员。
A guy is no good.
一个男人就不好了。
They're generally homosexuals.
他们一般都是同性恋者。
When I first met up with him, we went to a soup kitchen where he ate.
当我第一次见到他时，我们去了他吃饭的施粥处。
I did a tape in there and he introduced me to other people he ate with, the other people in the soup kitchen, who had known him for years since he goes to the soup kitchen several times a week.
我在那里录了一盘磁带，他把我介绍给和他一起吃饭的其他人，施粥处的其他人，自从他每周去几次施粥处以来，他们已经认识他很多年了。
This is your son?
这是你儿子？
Nick's Father This is my son, Nicholas.
尼克的父亲这是我的儿子尼古拉斯。
This is a good friend of mine.
这是我的一个好朋友。
I'm not kidding you.
我不是在开玩笑。
I thought you were just somebody he picked up on the way making a documentary.
我以为你只是他在拍纪录片的路上认识的人。
I can't believe a handsome kid like you belongs to him.
我不敢相信像你这样英俊的孩子是他的。
It was the mother.
是母亲。
The mother was beautiful.
母亲很美丽。
I was lucky.
我很幸运。
He was very proud that this is my son.
他很自豪这是我的儿子。
And no one really believed that he had a son.
没有人真正相信他有一个儿子。
I said, yeah, I was his son.
我说，是的，我是他的儿子。
And he bragged to people that I was working at Columbia University.
他向人们吹嘘我在哥伦比亚大学工作。
He teaches at Columbia University.
他在哥伦比亚大学任教。
My kid.
我的孩子。
Imagine that.
想象一下。
For writing.
为了写作。
That's a miracle.
这真是一个奇迹。
Nick's Father Well again, his mother had brains.
尼克的父亲 好吧，他的母亲很有头脑。
I got to get another coffee.
我得再去喝一杯咖啡。
How old are you anyway?
你到底几岁了？
Yeah, 35.
是的，35岁。
Nick's Father When's the last time I saw you?
尼克的父亲 我最后一次见到你是什么时候？
Four years ago.
四年前。
Nick's Father How the hell you'd go to the NYU [UNINTELLIGIBLE] school?
尼克的父亲 你到底怎么会去纽约大学[无法理解]学校？
I don't know what promoted you.
我不知道是什么让你晋升的。
How'd you go there?
你怎么去那里？
You majored in writing?
你是学写作专业的？
Yeah.
是的。
Nick's Father Struggling fully.
尼克的父亲正在全力挣扎。
He knows how successful his father is as a writer.
他知道他的父亲作为一名作家有多成功。
A lot of times I'm very frustrated when I go and meet with him because it seems like he tells the same stories over and over again.
很多时候，当我去见他时，我感到非常沮丧，因为他似乎一遍又一遍地讲述同样的故事。
They seem very disconnected to reality.
他们似乎与现实非常脱节。
But those few times where I have felt some connection, it does seem that he's just let his guard down a little bit and let me glimpse at his struggle in some way.
但那几次我感觉到某种联系的时候，他似乎确实放松了一点警惕，让我以某种方式瞥见了他的挣扎。
You know, what connects us.
你知道，是什么将我们联系在一起。
He actually wrote me a letter right after-- he sent me a couple letters after my book of poems came out.
事实上，他在我的诗集出版后不久就给我写了一封信。
In the first one it just says, "Dear Nick, your book is a classic.
在第一本书中，它只是说：“亲爱的尼克，你的书是经典。
Love, your father." That's a unique letter.
爱你的父亲。”这是一封独特的信。
Because the classic has only been a word that he's ever reserved for his own work.
因为经典只是他为自己的作品保留的一个词。
And so for him to apply that to my is just sort of him turning, even if just for a second and sort of looking at me and saying something about what I've done.
因此，对他来说，将这一点应用到我身上只是他转过身来，即使只是一秒钟，然后看着我，谈论我所做的事情。
There has to be a reason that I've held onto his letters for all these years.
我这么多年来一直保留着他的信，一定是有原因的。
There has to be some sort of reason, something I've been waiting for, or looking for, or hoping for.
一定有某种原因，某种我一直在等待、寻找或希望的东西。
And yes, something like this is sort of maybe as close as I'll get to it.
是的，像这样的事情可能是我所能达到的最接近的了。
I would like to have sort of one of those deep, connecting moments with him.
我希望能与他度过一段深刻的、有联系的时刻。
But I'm not really sure if I've achieved that yet.
但我不太确定我是否已经实现了这一点。
Again, I'm actually not even sure if at this point, I would hope for or-- sure.
再说一次，我实际上什至不确定在这一点上我是否希望或者——当然。
Maybe you always hope for it, you just sort of deny that hope or something.
也许你总是希望它，你只是否认这种希望或其他什么。
I don't know if I even hope for it at this point.
我不知道此时此刻我是否还抱有希望。
It's almost enough just to sit in front of him.
光是坐在他面前就已经足够了。
To go to his room and sit with him for an hour.
去他的房间和他一起坐一个小时。
And just see where he is.
看看他在哪里。
And tell him, whatever.
并告诉他，无论如何。
I'll tell him one thing about myself.
我会告诉他一件关于我自己的事情。
If he hears it, that's great.
如果他听到了，那就太好了。
If he doesn't hear it, that's fine.
如果他没有听到，那也没关系。
I don't expect him to give me anything at this point.
我不指望他现在能给我任何东西。
It's almost enough just to go and see him.
去看看他就差不多够了。
It somehow calms me enough or settles my soul enough just to go and have some relationship at all with him.
它以某种方式让我足够平静，或者让我的灵魂足够安定，只是去和他建立一些关系。
I'm sort of down to the real basic, like really stripped down to the most basic father there can be.
我有点回归真正的基本，就像真正剥离到最基本的父亲一样。
He just is my father and there's nothing I can do about that.
他只是我的父亲，我对此无能为力。
There's nothing he can do about that.
他对此无能为力。
I go and I sit and I have a relationship with this person who is my father.
我走过去，坐下来，我和我的父亲建立了关系。
Nick Flynn's book of poems is called Some Ether .
尼克·弗林的诗集名为《Some Ether》。
He's working on a book in which his dad figures prominently.
他正在写一本以他父亲为主角的书。
Well, our program was produced by Wendy Dorr and myself, with Alex Blumberg, Jonathan Goldstein, and Starlee Kine.
嗯，我们的节目是由温迪·多尔和我、亚历克斯·布隆伯格、乔纳森·戈德斯坦和斯塔莉·凯恩共同制作的。
Senior producer Julie Snyder.
高级制片人朱莉·斯奈德。
Contributing editors Paul Tough, Jack Hitt, [UNINTELLIGIBLE], Rebecca Carroll, Alix Spiegel, Nancy Updike and consigliere Sarah Vowell.
特约编辑 Paul Tough、Jack Hitt、[无法辨认]、Rebecca Carroll、Alix Spiegel、Nancy Updike 和顾问 Sarah Vowell。
Elizabeth Meister runs our website.
伊丽莎白·梅斯特 (Elizabeth Meister) 负责运营我们的网站。
Production help from Todd Bachmann and Paul McCarthy.
托德·巴赫曼 (Todd Bachmann) 和保罗·麦卡锡 (Paul McCarthy) 为制作提供帮助。
Musical help from Mr. John Connors.
约翰·康纳斯先生提供音乐帮助。
[ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS] If you'd like to buy a cassette copy of this program, a little late for Father's Day, but still, you can own it.
[致谢] 如果您想购买该节目的盒式磁带，虽然在父亲节有点晚了，但您仍然可以拥有它。
Call us here at WBEZ in Chicago 312-832-3380.
请致电芝加哥 WBEZ 312-832-3380。
Or visit our website where you can also listen to our programs for free, absolutely free at www.thisamericanlife.org.
或者访问我们的网站，您还可以免费收听我们的节目，完全免费，网址为 www.thisamericanlife.org。
This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
[FUNDING CREDITS] WBEZ management oversight by Torey Malatia.
[资金来源] WBEZ 管理由 Torey Malatia 监督。
I tell you, the staff of the show just keeps complaining about Torey lately.
我告诉你，节目的工作人员最近一直在抱怨托里。
They run into him in the restroom and I don't get what is going on with him these days.
他们在洗手间遇到了他，我不明白他这些天发生了什么事。
Be naked, flexing like this divorcee, pumping iron Arnold Schwarzenegger.
赤身裸体，像离婚的阿诺·施瓦辛格那样挥舞着身体。
I'm IRA Glass, back next week with more stories of this American life.
我是 IRA Glass，下周回来，带来更多关于美国生活的故事。
He'd want me to grab his biceps to see how they were growing.
他希望我抓住他的二头肌，看看它们的生长情况。
It was just absolutely horrible.
这真是太可怕了。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。