174: Birthdays, Anniversaries, and Milestones - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #174 | January 13, 2023 174: Birthdays, Anniversaries, and Milestones Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 174 集 | 2023 年 1 月 13 日 174：生日、周年纪念日和里程碑 注：《This American Life》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.
如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue Ira Glass With the holiday season about to begin, it's a show about holidays and milestones of all kinds.
序言 Ira Glass 随着假期即将开始，这是一部关于假期和各种里程碑的节目。
Today's This American Life was taped a few years back in front of a live audience.
今天的《美国生活》是几年前在现场观众面前录制的。
When the big day finally arrives, the day you've been waiting for, it's like the invisible is made visible.
当你一直在等待的重要日子终于到来时，就好像无形的东西变得可见了。
And sometimes you look at it and you think, that's it?
有时你看着它，你会想，就是这样吗？
[LAUGHTER] For weeks before his 11th birthday, Jason wanted a party at a roller rink with all his friends.
[笑声] 杰森 11 岁生日前几周，他想和他所有的朋友在溜冰场举办一场派对。
He had never had a birthday party, so he invites 11 friends, gets their RSVPs, and comes the big day, the party room at the roller rink is his.
他从来没有举办过生日派对，所以他邀请了 11 位朋友，得到了他们的回复，到了重要的日子，溜冰场的派对室就是他的了。
And we waited around, we waited around.
我们等着，我们等着。
And we're waiting there for around a half hour, and none of my friends, none of the invited guests had arrived.
我们在那里等了大约半个小时，我的朋友、受邀的客人都没有到达。
And so they put us in the room and my mom asked me, well, where is everybody?
所以他们把我们安排在房间里，我妈妈问我，好吧，每个人都在哪里？
Where is everybody?
大家都在哪里？
And I say, Ma, I don't know where everybody is.
我说，妈妈，我不知道每个人都在哪里。
Well, didn't they say they'd be here?
嗯，他们不是说要来这里吗？
Yeah, they said they'd be here.
是的，他们说他们会在这里。
I have this vivid, vivid image marked on my brain of a table and 10 chairs around the table and all of these sundaes, these white sundaes with hot fudge on them.
我的脑海里浮现出这样一幅生动的画面：一张桌子，桌子周围有十把椅子，还有所有这些圣代，这些白色的圣代，上面涂着热软糖。
10 empty chairs.
10张空椅子。
10 uneaten sundaes.
10 个未吃过的圣代。
It's like The Last Supper but if none of the apostles made it.
这就像《最后的晚餐》，但如果没有使徒做到的话。
Exactly.
确切地。
Ira Glass To this day, Jason still cannot explain it.
艾拉·格拉斯 时至今日，杰森仍然无法解释。
He had friends at school, he was always picked first for kickball.
他在学校有朋友，他总是第一个被选中踢球。
The next year his cat, a cat that was the same age as he was, died on his birthday.
第二年，他的猫，一只和他同龄的猫，在他生日那天死了。
Another year, his aunts and uncles accidentally set fire to the back of his house.
还有一年，他的叔叔阿姨不小心放火烧毁了他房子的后面。
In preparing for today's program, I have heard lots of horrifying birthday stories.
在准备今天的节目时，我听到了很多恐怖的生日故事。
Matt was robbed on his birthday.
马特在生日那天遭到抢劫。
Lynn's home was destroyed by an earthquake.
林恩的家在地震中被毁。
Sarah had a tree that was planted the day she was born.
莎拉有一棵树，是她出生那天种下的。
And on her 17th birthday, lightning hit the tree.
在她 17 岁生日那天，闪电击中了那棵树。
It burned to the ground.
它被烧毁了。
How do you not see that as symbolic of something?
你怎么不认为这是某种东西的象征呢？
Years after Jason's party at the roller rink, the one where nobody showed up, his girlfriend still asks him about it.
杰森在溜冰场举办的派对多年后无人出席，但他的女朋友仍然问起这件事。
And she asks him about it a lot.
她经常问他这件事。
It must explain something about who he is today.
它必须解释他今天是谁。
And I have to point out again that I don't think, at least, that I was a loser when I was growing up.
我必须再次指出，至少我不认为我在成长过程中是一个失败者。
But the thing is, as much as I say that, it happened.
但事实是，正如我所说，它确实发生了。
I had this birthday party that only one person went to.
我举办了一个只有一个人参加的生日聚会。
And that's going to hold stronger than anything that I could possibly say to convince you that I was not a loser.
这比我所说的任何让你相信我不是失败者的事情都更有效。
Certain days have symbolic meaning whether we want them to or not.
无论我们是否愿意，某些日子都具有象征意义。
That's why it's important, I think, to overcompensate, to go big, throw a huge party, surround yourself with people, make a lot of noise.
我认为，这就是为什么过度补偿、做大、举办一场盛大的聚会、让自己周围都是人、制造很多噪音是很重要的。
That is why, my friends, today, on the fifth anniversary of our radio show, we have come out here to be with you in this huge theater.
这就是为什么，我的朋友们，今天，在我们广播节目五周年之际，我们来到这个巨大的剧院与你们在一起。
From WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life .
来自芝加哥 WBEZ 和国际公共广播电台的《This American Life》。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
[APPLAUSE] Our program recorded today on a four-city tour of New York, Boston, Chicago, and Los Angeles.
[掌声]我们的节目今天在纽约、波士顿、芝加哥和洛杉矶四个城市巡演中录制。
A co-production with radio stations WNYC, WBUR, WBEZ, and KCRW.
与 WNYC、WBUR、WBEZ 和 KCRW 广播电台联合制作。
Many, many thanks to them.
非常非常感谢他们。
Today on our program, birthdays, anniversaries, milestones of all sorts, and what do they really mean anyway?
今天在我们的节目中，生日、周年纪念日、各种里程碑，它们到底意味着什么？
Act One, Pilgrim's Progress.
第一幕，天路历程。
Sarah Vowell takes over the family Thanksgiving dinner by bringing everyone to New York City.
莎拉·沃威尔 (Sarah Vowell) 接管了家庭感恩节晚餐，带领大家来到纽约市。
Babies cryin', birds a-dyin', people sighin', Ellis Island.
婴儿在哭泣，鸟儿在死去，人们在叹息，埃利斯岛。
Islan'.
伊斯兰'。
Act Two, Kodak Moments of the Dead, the story of a young funeral director who is updating one of our most sacred and oldest rituals of commemoration, doing something that even other funeral directors find very, very strange.
第二幕，柯达死亡时刻，讲述了一位年轻葬礼承办人的故事，他正在更新我们最神圣、最古老的纪念仪式之一，做了一些连其他葬礼承办人都觉得非常非常奇怪的事情。
Act Three, Birthday Gift.
第三幕，生日礼物。
Russell Banks has a story that unfolds so cleanly and pleasingly that really, I have to say, the less said about it at this point, the better.
拉塞尔·班克斯的故事展开得如此干净利落、令人愉悦，我不得不说，在这一点上，说得越少越好。
Music throughout our hour from Chicago pop music sensation OK Go.
整个小时的音乐均来自芝加哥流行音乐界的“OK Go”。
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
[APPLAUSE] Act One: Pilgrim's Progress Ira Glass Act One, Pilgrim's Progress.
[掌声] 第一幕：天路历程 Ira Glass 第一幕，天路历程。
We are a nation whose national holidays are usually more about getting together with family and friends than actually commemorating the past.
我们国家的国定假日通常更多的是与家人和朋友聚会，而不是真正纪念过去。
When Labor Day rolls around, I do not think that many of us review the history of Haymarket Square or the fight for the eight-hour work day.
当劳动节到来时，我认为我们中的很多人都不会回顾干草市场广场的历史或争取八小时工作日的斗争。
Even in this crowd.
即使在这人群中。
[LAUGHTER] I will confess that I was actually well into my 20s before I fully understood that Veterans Day and Memorial Day are actually two separate holidays with separate meanings and not just one holiday that comes around a lot.
[笑声] 我得承认，我实际上是在 20 多岁的时候才完全理解退伍军人节和阵亡将士纪念日实际上是两个具有不同含义的独立节日，而不仅仅是一个经常出现的节日。
This does not mean that our big national holidays do not contain deep, commemorative meaning to us.
这并不意味着我们的重大国家节日对我们来说没有深刻的纪念意义。
It's just, I think, that the meaning is often personal.
我认为，只是其含义往往是个人的。
Sarah Vowell is one of our contributing editors, and she says this year, her family broke with all its traditions on Thanksgiving and launched into an entirely new era as a family.
莎拉·沃威尔（Sarah Vowell）是我们的特约编辑之一，她说今年，她的家人在感恩节打破了所有传统，作为一个家庭进入了一个全新的时代。
Please welcome her.
请欢迎她。
[APPLAUSE] Sarah Vowell When I invited my mom and dad to come to New York City to have Thanksgiving at my house, I never expected them to say yes.
[掌声]莎拉·沃威尔 当我邀请爸爸妈妈来纽约我家过感恩节时，我没想到他们会答应。
Not only had they never been to New York, they had never been east of the Mississippi, nor had they ever visited me.
他们不仅从未去过纽约，也从未去过密西西比河以东，也从未拜访过我。
I've always had these fantasies about being in a normal family in which the parents come to town and their adult daughter spends their entire visit daydreaming of suicide.
我一直幻想生活在一个正常的家庭里，父母来到城里，他们成年的女儿在整个访问期间都在做自杀的白日梦。
I'm here to tell you that dreams really do come true.
我来这里是想告诉你，梦想真的成真了。
[LAUGHTER] I was terrified we wouldn't have enough to talk about.
[笑声] 我很害怕我们没有足够的话题可以谈论。
In the interest of harmony, there's a tacit agreement in my family.
为了和睦，家里有一种默契。
The following subjects are best avoided in any conversation longer than a minute and a half-- national politics, state and local politics, any music by any person who never headlined at the Grand Ole Opry, my personal life, and their so-called God.
在任何超过一分半钟的谈话中最好避免以下话题：国家政治、州和地方政治、从未在大奥普里成为头条新闻的人创作的任何音乐、我的个人生活以及他们所谓的上帝。
[LAUGHTER] Five whole days.
[笑声]整整五天。
When I visit them back home in Montana, conversation isn't a problem because we go to the movies every afternoon.
当我回到蒙大拿州的家中时，谈话不是问题，因为我们每天下午都去看电影。
That way, we can be together but without the burden of actually talking to each other.
这样，我们就可以在一起，但没有彼此真正交谈的负担。
Tommy Lee Jones does the talking for us.
汤米·李·琼斯为我们说话。
Bless his heart, that is a public service.
祝福他的心，那是一种公共服务。
But my sister Amy is bringing her, shall we say, lively seven-month-old son Owen along, so the cinema is not an option.
但我姐姐艾米带着她，我们可以说，活泼的七个月大的儿子欧文一起去，所以电影院不是一个选择。
Which means five days together, just us, no movies.
这意味着在一起五天，只有我们，没有电影。
We are headed into uncharted and possibly hostile lands, pioneers in a new world.
我们正在进入未知且可能充满敌意的土地，成为新世界的先驱。
It is Thanksgiving.
今天是感恩节。
The Pilgrims had the Mayflower.
清教徒们拥有五月花号。
I buy a gravy boat.
我买了一个肉汁船。
It's lucky that Amy's coming with Mom and Dad.
很幸运艾米和爸爸妈妈一起来。
Amy still lives six blocks away from them in Bozeman.
艾米仍然住在距离他们六个街区的博兹曼。
She would act as interpreter and go-between among my parents and me.
她将充当我和父母之间的翻译和中间人。
Like Squanto.
就像斯匡托一样。
[LAUGHTER] Amy's husband Jay has decided to stay home in Montana to go deer hunting with his brother.
[笑声]艾米的丈夫杰伊决定留在蒙大拿州的家里和他的兄弟一起去猎鹿。
Everyone else arrives at my apartment in Chelsea.
其他人都到达我在切尔西的公寓。
Amy and Owen are bunking with me, so I walk my parents around the corner to check them into their hotel on 23rd.
艾米和欧文和我一起睡，所以我陪父母绕过拐角处，让他们在 23 号入住酒店。
"Here we are," says Mom, stopping under the awning of the Chelsea Hotel.
“我们到了，”妈妈在切尔西酒店的遮阳篷下停下来说道。
There she stands, a woman whose favorite book is called, simply, Matthew--
她站在那里，一个女人，她最喜欢的书的名字很简单，就是马修——
[LAUGHTER] --right on the spot where the cops hauled Sid Vicious out in handcuffs after his girlfriend was found stabbed to death on their hotel room floor.
[笑声]——就在 Sid Vicious 的女友被发现在酒店房间地板上被刺死后，警察将他戴上手铐拖出来的地方。
"No, mother," I say, taking her arm and directing her down the block to the Chelsea Savoy, a hotel where they go to the trouble to clean the rooms each day.
“不，妈妈，”我说，拉着她的手臂，带她沿着街区来到切尔西萨沃伊酒店，这是一家他们每天不辞辛劳地打扫房间的酒店。
It is around this time, oh, 20 minutes into their trip, that my dad starts making wisecracks like, "boy, kid, bet you can't wait 'til we're out of here." My father, a man who moved us 1,600 miles away from our Oklahoma relatives so he wouldn't have to see them anymore, makes a joke, on average, every two hours he is here about how much I'm anticipating the second they'll say goodbye.
就在这个时候，哦，他们的旅程开始了 20 分钟，我爸爸开始说俏皮话，比如，“孩子，我打赌你等不及我们离开这里了。”我的父亲把我们搬到了远离俄克拉荷马州亲戚 1,600 英里的地方，这样他就不用再见到他们了。他平均每两个小时来这里就会开一个玩笑，说我多么期待他们告别的那一刻。
I find this charming, but so disturbingly true I don't know what to say.
我觉得这很迷人，但如此令人不安的真实我不知道该说什么。
[LAUGHTER] By halfway through the first day, I discover I needn't have worried about what we would talk about with the baby preventing us from seeing movies.
[笑声] 第一天过半时，我发现我不必担心我们会和宝宝谈论什么而妨碍我们看电影。
When you have a baby around, the baby is the movie.
当你身边有孩子时，孩子就是电影。
We occupy an entire entertaining hour just on drool, non-narrative drool.
我们整个娱乐时间都被流口水、非叙事性的流口水占据了。
Then there's the sightseeing.
然后就是观光。
First stop, Ellis Island.
第一站，埃利斯岛。
The thing about going to Ellis Island is that it's a lot like going to Ellis Island.
去埃利斯岛的事情是它很像去埃利斯岛。
[LAUGHTER] Perhaps to help you better understand the immigrant experience, they make you stand in line for the crammed ferry for an hour and a half in the windy cold.
[笑声]也许是为了帮助你更好地了解移民经历，他们让你在寒风中排队一个半小时等待拥挤的渡轮。
By the time we step onto the island, we are huddled masses yearning to be free.
当我们踏上岛上时，我们已经挤在一起渴望自由。
Our great-grandmother Ellen passed through here on her way from Sweden.
我们的曾祖母艾伦从瑞典来的途中经过这里。
We watch a video on the health inspections given to immigrants, walk past oodles of photos of men in hats and women in shawls.
我们观看了对移民进行健康检查的视频，走过大量戴着帽子的男人和披着披肩的女人的照片。
Though no one says anything, I know my father and mother and sister are thinking what I'm thinking.
虽然没有人说什么，但我知道我的爸爸、妈妈和姐姐和我想的一样。
They're thinking about when we moved away from Oklahoma to Montana, how unknown that was, how strange and lonesome.
他们在想，当我们从俄克拉荷马州搬到蒙大拿州时，那是多么陌生，多么陌生和孤独。
I read a letter in a display case that says, "and I never saw my mother again." And I think of my grandfather, how we just drove off, leaving him behind, waving to us in the rear-view mirror.
我在陈列柜里读到一封信，上面写着：“我再也没有见过我的母亲。”我想起了我的祖父，我们刚刚开车离开，把他留在后面，在后视镜里向我们招手。
And here we are in New York, because here I am in New York.
我们在纽约，因为我在纽约。
Because ever since Ellen's father brought her here, every generation moves away from the one before.
因为自从艾伦的父亲把她带到这里以来，每一代人都在远离上一代。
It is curious that we Americans have a holiday, Thanksgiving, that's all about people who left their homes for a life of their own choosing, a life that was different from their parents' lives.
奇怪的是，我们美国人有一个节日，感恩节，这个节日是关于那些离开家园去过自己选择的生活的人，一种与父母的生活不同的生活。
And how do we celebrate it?
我们该如何庆祝呢？
By hanging out with our parents.
和我们的父母一起出去玩。
It's as if on the 4th of July, we honored our independence from the British by playing cricket and nibbling on crumpets.
就好像在 7 月 4 日，我们通过打板球和吃烤饼来纪念我们脱离英国的独立。
[LAUGHTER] Thanksgiving morning, my parents take Owen to see the Macy's parade while Amy and I start making dinner.
[笑声] 感恩节早上，我父母带欧文去看梅西百货游行，而艾米和我开始做晚饭。
Let me repeat that.
让我重复一遍。
My mother leaves while I cook, specifically cornbread dressing, a dish my mother has made every Thanksgiving since before I was born.
当我做饭时，我妈妈就离开了，尤其是玉米面包酱，这是我出生之前，我妈妈每年感恩节都会做的一道菜。
To her credit, she has not inquired about my process since she phoned to ask me if she should bring cornmeal in her suitcase.
值得赞扬的是，自从她打电话问我是否应该在手提箱里带玉米粉以来，她就没有询问过我的流程。
As an Okie, my mom only uses white cornmeal processed by the Shawnee Company in Muskogee.
作为俄亥俄人，我妈妈只使用马斯科吉肖尼公司加工的白玉米粉。
She does not even consider my cornbread to be cornbread at all, because I make it with yellow cornmeal and-- heresy-- sugar.
她甚至根本不认为我的玉米面包是玉米面包，因为我是用黄色玉米粉和——异端——糖做的。
"You don't make cornbread," she told me in the same deflated voice she uses to describe my hair--
“你不会做玉米面包，”她用同样沮丧的声音告诉我，她用来形容我的头发——
I'm standing at the cutting board chopping sage, and it hits me what it means that she's letting me be in charge of the dressing-- I am going to die.
我站在切菜板前切鼠尾草，我突然意识到她让我负责调味意味着什么——我快要死了。
Being in charge of the dressing means you're a grown-up for real.
负责着装意味着你是真正的成年人了。
And being a grown-up for real means you're getting old.
真正长大意味着你正在变老。
And getting old means you are definitely, finally, totally going to die.
变老意味着你最终肯定会完全死去。
My mother is a grandmother, and my sister is a mother, and I have decided the dressing will be yellow this year, therefore we'll all be dead someday.
我的母亲是一位祖母，我的妹妹是一位母亲，我决定今年的敷料将是黄色的，因此有一天我们都会死去。
Happy holidays!
节日快乐！
[LAUGHTER] I have invited two of my New York friends to join us for dinner, and I was a little nervous about how everyone would get along.
[笑声]我邀请了我的两个纽约朋友来和我们一起吃晚饭，我对每个人的相处方式有点紧张。
To my delight, the meal is smooth and congenial.
令我高兴的是，这顿饭很顺利而且很愉快。
My friends and I talk about the West Nile Virus killing birds on Long Island.
我和我的朋友谈论西尼罗河病毒杀死长岛的鸟类。
My father counters with a lovely anecdote about an open copper pit in Butte that filled up with contaminated rainwater and killed 250 geese in one day.
我父亲用一则可爱的轶事反驳说，巴特的一个露天铜矿坑里充满了受污染的雨水，一天之内杀死了 250 只鹅。
There's nothing like eating one dead bird and talking about a bunch of other dead birds to really bring people together.
没有什么比吃掉一只死鸟并谈论一堆其他死鸟更能真正让人们聚集在一起的了。
The next morning, right about the time Owen starts to cry while simultaneously my mother jams the bathroom door and my father's on his hands and knees prying it open with a penknife, a cloud passes over me.
第二天早上，就在欧文开始哭泣的时候，同时我母亲堵住了浴室的门，而我父亲则用手和膝盖着地用小刀撬开门，一朵云从我的头顶掠过。
Once or twice a day, I am enveloped inside what I like to call the impenetrable shield of melancholy.
每天有一两次，我被包裹在我称之为无法穿透的忧郁之盾之中。
This shield, it is impenetrable, hence the name.
此盾，坚不可摧，故名。
I cannot speak.
我不能说话。
And while I can feel myself freeze up, I can't do anything about it.
虽然我感觉自己僵住了，但我却无能为力。
Everybody in the family goes through these little spells.
家里的每个人都会经历这些小事。
I just happen to be the spooky one at this particular moment.
我只是碰巧在这个特殊时刻成为了令人毛骨悚然的人。
When people ask me if I'm the black sheep of the family, I always say that no, we're all black sheep.
当人们问我是不是家里的害群之马时，我总是说不，我们都是害群之马。
Every few hours they're here, I look over at my dad nervously crunching his fingers together.
每隔几个小时，他们来的时候，我就会看着爸爸紧张地把手指咬在一起。
If he were at home for Thanksgiving, he'd be ignoring us and spending all his time in his shop.
如果他在家过感恩节，他就会无视我们，把所有时间都花在他的店里。
The thing that unites us is that all four of us are homebody claustrophobes who prefer to be alone and are suspicious of other people.
让我们团结在一起的是，我们四个人都是宅在家里的幽闭恐惧症患者，他们喜欢独处，并对其他人持怀疑态度。
So the trait that binds us together as a family, preferring to keep to ourselves, makes it difficult to be together as a family.
因此，将我们作为一个家庭联系在一起的特质，就是喜欢独处，使得我们很难作为一个家庭在一起。
Paradoxically, it's at these times that I feel closest to them, that I understand them best, that I love them most.
矛盾的是，正是在这些时候，我感觉与他们最亲近，最了解他们，最爱他们。
It's just surprising we ever breed.
我们能繁殖真是令人惊讶。
[LAUGHTER] The next day, we do the most typical thing we could possibly do as a family.
[笑声] 第二天，我们做了我们一家人能做的最典型的事情。
We split up.
我们分手了。
By the time we all reconvene on Saturday evening, my ragged mother becomes so ambitious with her sightseeing that I can tell she's decided that she's never coming back.
当我们周六晚上再次聚会时，我衣衫褴褛的母亲对观光变得如此雄心勃勃，我可以看出她已经决定不再回来了。
"You guys want to go to Rockefeller Center?" I ask.
“你们想去洛克菲勒中心吗？”我问。
And she says, "yeah, because who knows when I'll be back again?
她说：“是的，因为谁知道我什么时候会回来？
Ditto the Empire State Building, because who knows when I'll be back again?"
帝国大厦也是如此，因为谁知道我什么时候会再次回来呢？”
If any of you are visiting the Empire State Building, may I offer some advice?
如果你们中有人要参观帝国大厦，我可以提供一些建议吗？
If you are waiting in the very long line for the very last elevator, and an attendant says that anyone who wants to walk up the last six flights may do so now, right away, and you are with your aging parents and a sister who is carrying a child the size of a fax machine, stay in line for the elevator.
如果你排着很长的队等待最后一部电梯，服务员说任何想登上最后六层电梯的人现在就可以这样做，而且你和年迈的父母以及怀着传真机大小的孩子的姐姐在一起，请继续排队乘电梯。
But if you must take the stairs, go first and do not look back.
但如果必须走楼梯，请先走，不要回头。
Otherwise, your parents will look like one of those Renaissance frescoes of Adam and Eve being expelled from the Garden of Eden, all hunched over and afraid.
否则，你的父母就会像文艺复兴时期壁画中亚当和夏娃被逐出伊甸园的一幅，弓着背，充满恐惧。
So we make it to the observation deck, Brooklyn to the south of us, New Jersey to the west.
所以我们到达了观景台，布鲁克林在我们的南边，新泽西在西边。
Places that people fled to from far away.
人们从远方逃往的地方。
Places that people now run away from to make another life.
人们现在为了另一种生活而逃离的地方。
It's dark and cold and windy, and we're sweaty from climbing the stairs.
天又黑又冷又风大，我们爬楼梯都出汗了。
It's really pretty, though.
不过，它确实很漂亮。
And there we stand, side by side, sharing a thought like the family we are.
我们肩并肩地站在那里，像一家人一样分享着同样的想法。
My sister wishes she were home, my mom and dad wish they were home, I wish they were home, too.
我姐姐希望她在家，我妈妈和爸爸希望他们在家，我希望他们也在家。
Thank you.
谢谢。
[APPLAUSE] [MUSIC - "BYE BYE BABY" BY OK GO]
[掌声] [音乐 - OK GO 的“BYE BYE BABY”]
Act Two, Kodak Moments of the Dead.
第二幕，柯达死亡时刻。
Not long ago, one of our producers, Starlee Kine, went to the funeral of a relative of hers in Los Angeles.
不久前，我们的一位制片人 Starlee Kine 去洛杉矶参加了她一位亲戚的葬礼。
There were four eulogies, and it was Starlee's grandmother, Goldie, who did a grand stem-winder of a speech, inspiring and moving and heartfelt.
共有四篇悼词，斯塔莉的祖母戈尔迪发表了一篇精彩的演讲，鼓舞人心、感人至深。
So Goldie finishes and sits back down between her 88-year-old sister, Viv, on one side and Starlee on the other.
戈尔迪完成后，坐回到她 88 岁的姐姐维芙（Viv）和斯塔莉（Starlee）中间。
And then, on a big TV screen in front of the chapel, a video begins.
然后，教堂前面的大电视屏幕上开始播放视频。
The grandmother cannot believe it.
奶奶不敢相信。
She nudges her sister Viv, stage whispering, "have you ever?"
她碰了碰妹妹薇芙，在舞台上轻声问道：“你试过吗？”
On screen are pictures of the deceased.
屏幕上是死者的照片。
Black and white on the beach is a young man, a wedding shot with his wife, the obligatory goofy shot of him in a dress with his buddies.
海滩上的黑白照片是一个年轻人，一张和他妻子的婚礼照，一张他和他的朋友穿着裙子的傻乎乎的照片。
The photos were selected by the family and set to a musical soundtrack, which was also selected by the family.
这些照片是由家人挑选的，并设置了音乐配乐，音乐配乐也是由家人挑选的。
These being Jews-- my people-- as you might guess, there's only one real choice about the music, really no choice at all.
这些是犹太人——我的人民——正如你可能猜到的，关于音乐只有一种真正的选择，实际上根本没有选择。
[LAUGHTER] Barbra.
[笑声]芭芭拉。
Auntie Viv audibly exclaims, "oy vey!" Grandma Goldie responds, "oy, Viv!" But here's the thing, people are crying.
维芙阿姨大声喊道：“哎呀！”戈尔迪奶奶回应道：“哦，维芙！”但事情就是这样，人们在哭泣。
They're crying more than they cried during the eulogies.
他们哭的次数比悼词时哭的次数还要多。
And later, after the burial, back at the house, everybody watches the video over and over.
后来，葬礼结束后，回到家里，每个人都一遍又一遍地观看视频。
They laugh, they cry, they rewind, they replay.
他们笑，他们哭，他们倒带，他们重播。
Barbra hasn't had a hit like this since Yentl.
自 Yentl 以来，Barbra 还没有受到过这样的打击。
So I want to visit the cemetery where all this happens, where the cost of a grave or a crypt includes a personalized video to be shown at your funeral, to be posted for eternity on the internet, to be viewed on video screens scattered semi-tastefully throughout the cemetery grounds.
所以我想去参观这一切发生的墓地，那里的坟墓或墓穴的费用包括在你的葬礼上播放的个性化视频，将永远发布在互联网上，在散落在整个墓地的视频屏幕上观看。
This whole scheme is the brainchild of the impossibly young and impossibly handsome Tyler Cassity and his brother Brent.
整个计划是年轻得难以置信、英俊得令人难以置信的泰勒·卡西蒂和他的兄弟布伦特的创意。
They grew up in St. Louis, their dad was also in the funeral business, and they bought a rundown Hollywood cemetery three years ago, when Tyler was 27, and renamed it Hollywood Forever.
他们在圣路易斯长大，他们的父亲也从事殡葬业，三年前，泰勒 27 岁时，他们买下了一座破旧的好莱坞墓地，并将其更名为“好莱坞永远”。
Funerals, mind you, present the same questions that any anniversary or milestone presents.
请注意，葬礼提出的问题与任何周年纪念日或里程碑提出的问题相同。
How do you mark the passing of time?
你如何标记时间的流逝？
How do you capture the span of a life so it can be commemorated and remembered?
如何捕捉生命的跨度，以便纪念和铭记？
And Tyler says that the way that most American funerals address this question is with a ritual in technology that had not really changed very much since the Civil War.
泰勒说，大多数美国葬礼解决这个问题的方式都是采用技术仪式，这种仪式自内战以来并没有真正改变太多。
The big innovation during the Civil War was embalming.
内战期间的重大创新是防腐。
Embalming preserved a person's body for a week or so while you shipped them home from a battlefield.
当你把一个人从战场运回家时，防腐可以将他们的尸体保存一周左右。
But during the Civil War, it became widespread, and it popularized this kind of funeral, the kind that we know today, where the body is dressed up and put on display during the service.
但在内战期间，这种葬礼变得普遍，并普及了这种葬礼，就是我们今天所知道的那种，在葬礼期间，尸体会被盛装打扮并展示出来。
You want to pump fluid into that body so it seems kind of life-like, pink fluid.
你想将液体泵入体内，使其看起来像栩栩如生的粉红色液体。
And you want to paint the face.
你想画脸。
A mortician feels like he's succeeded if the family says, "look, he looks so alive." Whereas our enhancement to that is that you show video of the person, media, media that in some way has captured life.
如果家人说“看，他看起来还活着”，殡葬师就会觉得自己成功了。而我们对此的增强是，你可以展示以某种方式捕捉生活的人、媒体、媒体的视频。
And that media is 100 times stronger than an altered body.
而这种媒体比改变后的身体强 100 倍。
Our colleagues rebelled at the idea of having any type of screen in a chapel or near a body.
我们的同事反对在教堂或尸体附近放置任何类型的屏幕。
And yet they were holding tight to this tradition of embalming and face painting and extreme doctoring of the body to try and make it look alive.
然而，他们仍然坚持这种防腐、面部彩绘和对身体进行极端修饰的传统，试图让它看起来还活着。
The moment we put a screen in there, from that moment on, there was always a huge increase in the emotion of that service.
当我们在那里安装屏幕的那一刻起，从那一刻起，这项服务的情感总是大大增加。
That's when you started to have everyone crying, that's when you started to have laughter, tears, celebration.
那时你开始让每个人都哭泣，那时你开始有欢笑、泪水和庆祝。
That screen, once you put that in there, the whole thing changed.
那个屏幕，一旦你把它放在那里，整个事情就改变了。
Good morning, good afternoon, good evening.
早上好，下午好，晚上好。
Whenever you listen to this, you will hear the voices of your ever-loving mother and your dear father, normally known as Mom and Dad.
每当您聆听此歌曲时，您都会听到您永远慈爱的母亲和亲爱的父亲（通常称为妈妈和爸爸）的声音。
This is a video made of a kindly and endearing couple named Dorothy and Lester Schaffer They're sitting on lawn chairs in their backyard.
这是一段由一对名叫 Dorothy 和 Lester Schaffer 的友善可爱夫妇制作的视频，他们坐在后院的草坪椅上。
It's not bad.
这还不错。
They're affectionate, they goad each other on, they are genuinely funny.
他们很深情，他们互相激励，他们真的很有趣。
We hear, for example, the story of how the Schaffers met, on a school trip to the zoo.
例如，我们听到沙弗夫妇在一次学校动物园之旅中相识的故事。
Really.
真的。
On the path between the bear pits and the monkey cage.
在熊坑和猴笼之间的小路上。
Right between the bear pits and the monkey cage.
就在熊坑和猴笼之间。
Well, we started dating then.
嗯，我们从那时起就开始约会了。
And every time we'd have a date--
每次我们约会时——
It rained.
下雨了。
Lester Schaffer --it rained.
莱斯特·谢弗——下雨了。
I used to call her "my raindrop."
我曾经称她为“我的雨滴”。
As it turns out, in deciding to make videos which somehow capture what somebody is all about to preserve for eternity, Tyler and his brother have accidentally stumbled on a rather difficult artistic project.
事实证明，在决定制作视频以某种方式捕捉某人将永远保存的东西时，泰勒和他的兄弟无意中偶然发现了一个相当困难的艺术项目。
You get a sense of the Schaffers on their video, but only because of their own force of personality.
你可以从谢弗夫妇的视频中感受到他们的魅力，但这只是因为他们自己的个性力量。
They're charming.
他们很迷人。
Most of the videos made at the cemetery lack this kind of character, so much so that it reminds you just how hard it is to do, to capture somebody on film.
大多数在墓地拍摄的视频都缺乏这种特征，以至于它提醒你在电影中捕捉某人是多么困难。
At times, your heart goes out to the people in the videos.
有时，您会为视频中的人感到难过。
For instance, when they're asked by the filmmakers to leave a message to the future, you can almost see the flop sweat from the other side.
比如，当电影制片人要求他们给未来留言时，你几乎可以看到对方流汗的样子。
What would you say on the spot, really?
你当场会说什么？
This next clip is from a video made by a 40-ish man, who's actually still alive, named Steve Goldstein, who was asked to leave a few words of wisdom to the future.
下一个剪辑来自一个 40 岁左右的男人制作的视频，他实际上还活着，名叫史蒂夫·戈德斯坦（Steve Goldstein），他被要求为未来留下一些智慧的话。
I guess if I had to say something along those lines, it would be the most important thing in life is to learn to love each other, learn to get along, respect each other, respect each other's differences, appreciate your differences, celebrate your failures as much as your successes because that's how you grow.
我想如果我必须这么说的话，生命中最重要的事情就是学会彼此相爱，学会相处，互相尊重，尊重彼此的差异，欣赏你的差异，庆祝你的失败和你的成功一样，因为这就是你成长的方式。
You can't succeed without failing.
没有失败就不可能成功。
He continues with aphorisms like this for a while, ending with--
他继续这样的格言一段时间，最后是——
My life's been great.
我的生活过得很好。
I have no regrets.
我不后悔。
I honestly have no regrets.
老实说我并不后悔。
Except for some mistake I made on a game show once, a long time ago.
除了很久以前我在游戏节目中犯过的一些错误。
I could have won a lot of money.
我本可以赢很多钱。
Aside from that, I have no regrets.
除此之外，我没有任何遗憾。
Doing these, it's kind of like a robot.
做这些事情，有点像机器人。
They come, they go.
他们来了，他们走了。
I do the next one.
我做下一件。
It's kind of like I'm a machine.
这有点像我是一台机器。
I just do it.
我只是这么做。
So our emotions are kind of gone.
所以我们的情绪已经消失了。
Norman Brown is one of three editors who assemble these videos at computer workstations in a big, high-ceilinged room on the cemetery grounds.
诺曼·布朗是在墓地一个高天花板的大房间里的计算机工作站上组装这些视频的三名剪辑师之一。
The feeling part of the job is done by women, four women, who talk with the families, gather photos, and give shot-by-shot instructions to the editors.
这项工作的情感部分是由女性完成的，四名女性，她们与家人交谈，收集照片，并向剪辑师提供逐个镜头的指导。
As video production goes, this is factory work.
就视频制作而言，这是工厂工作。
90% of the videos are cut-and-paste jobs, just a series of photos which appear on screen for 10 seconds each with a pop song on the soundtrack, thrown together in a few hours after somebody dies to play at the funeral service.
90% 的视频都是剪切和粘贴的工作，只是一系列照片，每张照片在屏幕上显示 10 秒钟，配乐中有一首流行歌曲，是在有人去世后几个小时内拼凑起来在葬礼上播放的。
Often a family member narrates, explaining what the pictures are.
通常由家庭成员旁白，解释照片的内容。
Do people ever say, "well, my dad was a drunk?"
人们是否曾经说过：“好吧，我爸爸是个酒鬼？”
"We had a hard time seeing eye to eye.
“我们很难达成一致。
We didn't always get along.
我们并不总是相处得很好。
I think they were disappointed in me sometimes."
我认为他们有时对我感到失望。”
No, none of that.
不，都不是。
We don't get any, "oh, he was a drug addict, he was an unfit father."
我们没有得到任何信息，“哦，他是一个吸毒者，他是一个不称职的父亲。”
No. We have no affairs.
不，我们没有外遇。
We've had none of that.
我们没有这样的经历。
They don't say, "yeah, he was a horn dog," or anything.
他们不会说，“是的，他是一只角狗”之类的。
Just everything is positive.
一切都是积极的。
Which seems, I have to say, completely appropriate to the occasion and the task at hand at any milestone event-- an anniversary, a birthday, a funeral, even a national holiday.
我不得不说，这似乎完全适合任何里程碑事件的场合和手头的任务——周年纪念日、生日、葬礼，甚至是国定假日。
I think we do not want the whole picture.
我认为我们不想要全貌。
I think we want a pretty picture.
我想我们想要一张漂亮的照片。
I don't we're dealing with honesty in this.
我不认为我们在这件事上要诚实。
This is not the whole.
这还不是全部。
You've got to look at the purpose of, what is the purpose of your going to this funeral?
你必须看看你参加这个葬礼的目的是什么？
At that moment, at that funereal moment, at that moment of death, we do want as much good as we can.
在那一刻，在那葬礼的那一刻，在那死亡的那一刻，我们确实想要尽可能多的美好。
And we do want as many good memories as we can.
我们确实想要尽可能多的美好回忆。
Tyler Cassity says that it's hard enough to get through the death of someone we love.
泰勒·卡西蒂说，经历我们所爱之人的去世已经够困难的了。
Of course this is what we want.
当然这就是我们想要的。
Tyler and his brother have only been making funeral videos for a few years.
泰勒和他的兄弟制作葬礼视频只有几年时间。
And they definitely see it as a work in progress, something that they're still figuring out.
他们肯定将其视为一项正在进行的工作，他们仍在研究中。
But all this thinking about how you preserve memories has led Tyler to start collecting his own scrapbooks, documenting his own life.
但所有这些关于如何保存记忆的思考促使泰勒开始收集自己的剪贴簿，记录自己的生活。
He keeps two of these photo albums in his office.
他在办公室里保存了两本这样的相册。
And when I ask him to flip through the pages, he comes to one photo which leads him to tell this story.
当我让他翻阅这些书页时，他看到了一张照片，这让他讲述了这个故事。
It's a story which starts off at a family vacation and ends up at this cemetery, at his job, at this video project.
这个故事开始于一次家庭度假，结束于这个墓地、他的工作、这个视频项目。
The photo is of a fishing boat called La Victoria , taken on vacation when Tyler was just a teenager.
这张照片是泰勒十几岁时在度假时拍摄的一艘名为“维多利亚”的渔船。
And that's my father that you can make out there.
你可以从那里认出那是我的父亲。
And unknown to me, my mother had found a letter from a girl I know.
我不知道的是，我母亲发现了一封我认识的女孩写的信。
And she was writing this long plea to me to realize that I wasn't actually gay, because I had told her that I was gay.
她写了这么长的一封信，恳求我意识到我实际上并不是同性恋，因为我已经告诉她我是同性恋。
So for the first three days of this trip, everyone in the family was treating me as though I had died or something.
所以在这次旅行的前三天，家里的每个人都把我当作死了之类的。
They would just kind of not speak directly to me, and they were having difficulty looking at me.
他们只是不直接和我说话，而且很难看着我。
And so my mother concocted this plan to get my father and I on this all-day fishing trip in which he was supposed to ask me at a certain point.
因此，我母亲制定了这个计划，让我和父亲参加这个全天的钓鱼之旅，他应该在某个时候询问我。
And so here we are, being all macho on La Victoria .
所以我们在这里，在维多利亚号上充满男子气概。
He's supposed to ask you, "are you gay?"
他应该问你：“你是同性恋吗？”
Yes, on this fishing expedition.
是的，在这次钓鱼探险中。
Which was funny in itself because it's this Hemingway-esque test of manhood to be out here.
这本身就很有趣，因为这是海明威式的男子气概考验。
And I actually was the one to get the giant tuna.
事实上，我是第一个得到巨型金枪鱼的人。
I was reeling in the tuna.
我正在卷金枪鱼。
It was exactly as you see in the movies.
就像你在电影中看到的那样。
It was really hurting my hands.
实在是太伤我的手了。
And people are gathered around me, wanting me to reel this in and egging me on.
人们聚集在我周围，希望我把这件事告诉我，并怂恿我。
And then I finally get it up, and it's this big, beautiful, huge tuna-- actually, the one in this shot-- that's almost human-sized.
然后我终于把它举起来，这是一条又大又漂亮的金枪鱼——实际上，就是这张照片中的金枪鱼——几乎有人类大小。
And it was gorgeous.
真是太漂亮了。
And it falls on the floor, and everyone gathers around it and stabs it.
它落在地板上，每个人都聚集在它周围并刺伤它。
And I shriek, "don't kill it!" And it seemed like this very telling moment.
我尖叫道：“别杀它！”这似乎是一个非常有说服力的时刻。
And I don't know if that answered my father's question.
我不知道这是否回答了我父亲的问题。
[LAUGHTER] Ira Glass Tyler had moved to New York for college and stayed, partly to flee the family funeral business.
[笑声] 艾拉·格拉斯·泰勒 (Ira Glass Tyler) 搬到纽约上大学，并留下来，部分原因是为了逃离家族的殡葬生意。
Yeah.
是的。
It was kind of ironic.
这有点讽刺。
I thought I was going to leave death finally.
我以为我终于可以离开死亡了。
And a father's business who was all around caskets and death.
父亲的事业全都围绕着棺材和死亡。
And I went much deeper into the heart of death when I got there.
当我到达那里时，我对死亡的心更深了。
I was gay, and I went there to come out, and New York seemed like a good place.
我是同性恋，我去那里是为了出柜，纽约似乎是个好地方。
But I arrived in 1988, which was kind of the apex or the heart of the epidemic.
但我是在 1988 年到达的，那是流行病的顶峰或核心。
The AIDS epidemic.
艾滋病流行。
Tyler Cassity The AIDS epidemic.
泰勒·卡西蒂 艾滋病流行。
Everyone was in the mourning.
所有人都沉浸在哀悼之中。
Everybody knew someone who was dying.
每个人都认识一个即将死去的人。
There was always the thought that we could be dying because everyone was.
总是有人认为我们可能会死，因为每个人都在。
And so I think for a good six years, I was more obsessed about dying and death than I had ever been.
所以我想，在整整六年的时间里，我比以往任何时候都更加痴迷于临终和死亡。
And yet at same time, there's more people who didn't follow any type of tradition I had seen.
但与此同时，还有更多的人不遵循我所见过的任何类型的传统。
Maybe some people threw a nightclub party, and that was in their will.
也许有些人举办了一场夜总会派对，那是他们的意愿。
You know, "I want you all to have fun.
你知道，“我希望你们都玩得开心。
I want you all to dress in drag." Someone else had a dance ceremony, a poetry reading.
我希望你们都穿上变装。”还有人举行了舞会、诗歌朗诵会。
The form kind of seemed broken.
形式似乎有点破碎。
The form of a funeral?
葬礼的形式？
Tyler Cassity Of a funeral.
泰勒·卡西蒂 一场葬礼。
And being broken, it was much more powerful and it served a purpose again.
被打破后，它变得更加强大，并且再次发挥了作用。
And I didn't ever think I was going to go home and return to the business, but it affected completely how I looked at it.
我从来没有想过我会回家并重返公司，但这完全影响了我对它的看法。
You mean literally, you came to feel like the traditional funeral wasn't powerful enough to contain people's feelings?
你的意思是，从字面上看，你觉得传统的葬礼不足以容纳人们的感情？
Yeah.
是的。
Definitely.
确实。
The traditional funeral in terms of clergymen, one eulogy, and some last rites of some sort.
传统的葬礼包括牧师、悼词和某种最后的仪式。
In Los Angeles, he couldn't have chosen a better spot for adding movies to funerals.
在洛杉矶，他找不到比这更好的地方来在葬礼上播放电影了。
The run-down cemetery he and his brother bought is where lots of luminaries from the first generation of motion pictures are buried-- people like Rudolph Valentino, Peter Lorre, Cecil B.
他和他的兄弟买下的破旧墓地埋葬着许多第一代电影界的杰出人物，如鲁道夫·瓦伦蒂诺 (Rudolph Valentino)、彼得·洛 (Peter Lorre)、塞西尔·B.
Demille, Bugsy Siegel-- on a huge piece of land just next door to the Paramount Studios backlot.
德米尔、巴格西·西格尔——在派拉蒙影城外景片隔壁的一大片土地上。
Just a short walk from where Norman and his colleagues edit these sort-of fake, sort-of real videotapes for eternity are the sound stages where the pleasingly sort-of fake, sort-of real worlds of Frasier and Moesha are filmed.
距离诺曼和他的同事永远编辑这些假的、假的、真的录像带的地方不远就是摄影棚，《弗雷泽》和莫莎的令人愉悦的假的、假的、真实的世界就是在这里拍摄的。
As you walk through the cemetery, you see the intrusion of new technology here and there.
当你穿过墓地时，你会看到到处都是新技术的入侵。
Recent headstones made with photographs engraved right into the rock, made possible by a new kind of laser and computer technology.
最近的墓碑将照片直接刻在岩石上，这是通过新型激光和计算机技术实现的。
So far, it's mostly Russian and Armenian immigrants who go for this.
到目前为止，主要是俄罗斯和亚美尼亚移民这样做。
A man named Simon King, in a jacket, no tie, stares out from his own tombstone with this bad-ass glare like, even though he has passed over to the other side, if you mess with him, he can still take you down.
一个名叫西蒙·金的男人，穿着夹克，不打领带，从自己的墓碑上用那种恶毒的目光盯着外面，即使他已经走到了另一边，如果你惹他，他仍然可以把你打倒。
Not far from there is one of the video touchscreens, in the shade by a wall.
离这里不远的地方有一个视频触摸屏，位于墙边的阴凉处。
You can call up any video they've made.
您可以调用他们制作的任何视频。
And we choose a name.
我们选择一个名字。
It turns out to be a young woman, maybe 30.
原来是一位年轻女子，大概30岁左右。
As the song "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" plays, from The Lion King , photos flash by, 10 seconds each.
正如歌曲《今晚你能感受到爱吗？》播放《狮子王》中的照片，每张 10 秒闪过。
Here she is in the hospital.
她在医院里。
Here she is in shot after shot with a baby that must be hers.
在这张照片中，她和一个一定是她的孩子一起拍摄。
Then more hospital photos, holding her baby, trying, trying to smile.
然后是更多医院照片，抱着她的孩子，努力微笑。
It is impossibly sad, sadder than I can even convey to you here.
这是难以置信的悲伤，比我在这里向你们传达的还要悲伤。
There we are, in the bright Los Angeles sun, cars going by just yards away from us, a dead young mom on the TV, and we're mourning somebody we've never met.
我们就在那里，在洛杉矶明亮的阳光下，汽车在离我们几码远的地方驶过，电视上出现了一位死去的年轻妈妈，我们正在哀悼一个我们从未见过的人。
I think Tyler's right about all of this.
我认为泰勒对这一切的看法是对的。
I think if you were just walking by a stranger's tombstone and saw their name chiseled there on the rock, you'd never get this feeling.
我想，如果你只是走过一个陌生人的墓碑，看到他们的名字刻在岩石上，你永远不会有这种感觉。
Coming up, it's my birthday and I'll lie if I want to.
快到了，今天是我的生日，如果我愿意的话我会撒谎。
Or is it a lie?
还是谎言？
In a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.
国际公共广播电台一分钟后我们的节目仍在继续。
It's This American Life .
这就是美国生活。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we choose some theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
当然，每周我们的节目都会选择一些主题，为您带来关于该主题的各种不同类型的故事。
Today's program, to commemorate our fifth year on the air, birthdays, anniversaries, milestones of all sorts, how we mark them, what they mean even when we want them to mean nothing.
今天的节目是为了纪念我们播出第五周年，生日、周年纪念日、各种里程碑，我们如何标记它们，它们意味着什么，即使我们希望它们毫无意义。
Our program today taped on our fifth anniversary tour of New York, Boston, Chicago, and Los Angeles.
我们今天的节目录制了我们在纽约、波士顿、芝加哥和洛杉矶的五周年巡演。
And I have to say that we are honored at this point to have a special birthday greeting for the show, recorded by one of my radio heroes, Terry Gross of Fresh Air --
我不得不说，此时此刻，我们很荣幸能够为该节目送上一份特别的生日祝福，由我的电台英雄之一、Fresh Air 的特里·格罗斯 (Terry Gross) 录制——
[APPLAUSE] --which incredibly is celebrating its 25th year on the air this year.
[掌声]——令人难以置信的是，今年是该节目播出 25 周年。
It makes us just look like little kids up here.
这让我们看起来就像这里的小孩子。
She recorded this special message for us from her studio at WHYY in Philadelphia.
她在费城 WHYY 的工作室里为我们录制了这条特别的信息。
Five years, huh?
五年吧？
I suppose after five years I was still all bright-eyed and optimistic.
我想五年后我仍然目光明亮、乐观。
You know, kid-- [CIGARETTE PUFF] --after 25 years in this crazy public radio game, you see a few things.
你知道，孩子——[香烟扑通]——在这个疯狂的公共广播游戏中度过了 25 年之后，你会看到一些事情。
And you see a side of people you sometimes wish you hadn't.
你有时会看到一些你希望看不到的人的一面。
Don't get me started.
别让我开始。
The booze, the drugs, the crazy parties, the fundraisers.
酗酒、毒品、疯狂的派对、筹款活动。
Five years, huh?
五年吧？
Well, you've got a lot to learn still, I guess.
好吧，我想你还有很多东西要学。
Yeah, congratulations.
是的，恭喜。
Whatever.
任何。
Thank you, Terry Gross, for that kind message.
谢谢特里·格罗斯的善意留言。
Act Three, Birthday Present.
第三幕，生日礼物。
There's a hotel in Salt Lake City called The Anniversary Inn.
盐湖城有一家名为周年纪念旅馆的酒店。
Before this building became an institution devoted to commemorating years of marriage, the building was the Salt Lake City jail.
在这座建筑成为专门纪念结婚周年的机构之前，该建筑是盐湖城监狱。
Insert your own cheap joke here.
在这里插入你自己的廉价笑话。
The idea of the hotel is on an anniversary or a birthday or other big day, what we want is fantasy.
酒店的想法是在周年纪念日或生日或其他重大日子，我们想要的是幻想。
There's a room with a drawbridge and a knight in armor, designed to look like Sleeping Beauty's castle.
有一个房间有吊桥和一个穿着盔甲的骑士，设计得像睡美人的城堡。
There's a hayloft room and a Swiss Family Robinson tree house and a Treasure Island suite.
这里有一间干草棚房、一间瑞士家庭罗宾逊树屋和一间金银岛套房。
That one has a ship's mast and a crow's nest and sails stretching across the room.
那个房间有一根船桅、一个瞭望台和横跨整个房间的帆。
You walk the gangplank to jump into a jacuzzi.
您走上跳板跳进按摩浴缸。
I bring all this up because I think of The Anniversary Inn as a testament to the difficulty of introspection.
我提出这一切是因为我认为周年纪念旅馆证明了内省的困难。
It's as if when a big, commemorative day arrives, the notion of using that moment to look back, to take stock, to try to gain a perspective on who we've been and who we are, that notion is so inherently difficult and possibly painful that many of us, we prefer to leave reality completely.
就好像当一个重要的纪念日到来时，利用这一时刻来回顾、盘点、试图了解我们曾经是谁以及我们现在是谁，这个想法本质上是如此困难，甚至可能是痛苦的，以至于我们中的许多人宁愿完全离开现实。
Looking back, though, can be what we need more than anything.
然而，回顾过去可能是我们最需要的。
Russell Banks has this story.
拉塞尔·班克斯有这样一个故事。
He is the author of numerous books.
他是许多书籍的作者。
We are honored to have him.
我们很荣幸有他。
Please welcome him.
请欢迎他。
[APPLAUSE] Russell Banks It's about 10:00 PM, and I'm one of three, face it, middle-aged guys crossing South Main Street in light snow headed for a quick drink at the Greek's.
[掌声] Russell Banks 现在大约是晚上 10:00，我是三个中年人之一，面对现实吧，他们冒着小雪穿过南大街，前往希腊餐厅喝一杯。
We've just finished a 32nd degree induction ceremony at the Masonic Hall in the old Capitol Theater building and need a blow.
我们刚刚在旧国会大厦剧院大楼的共济会礼堂举行了第 32 届就职仪式，需要一个打击。
I'm the tall figure in the middle, Warren Low.
我是中间那个高个子，沃伦·洛。
And I guess it's my story I'm telling, although you could say it was Gail Fortunata's story, since meeting her that night after half a lifetime is what got me started.
我想我正在讲的是我的故事，尽管你可以说这是盖尔·福图纳塔的故事，因为半辈子后的那个晚上遇见她是我开始的故事。
I'm wearing remnants of makeup from the ceremony, in which I portrayed an Arab prince-- red lips, streaks of black on my face here and there, not quite washed off because of no cold cream at the hall.
我身上还带着仪式上残留的化妆品，在仪式上我扮演了一位阿拉伯王子——红红的嘴唇，脸上到处都是黑色的条纹，由于大厅里没有冷霜，所以还没有完全洗掉。
The guys tease me about what a terrific nigger I make.
这些家伙取笑我，说我是个多么了不起的黑鬼。
That's the way they talk.
他们就是这样说话的。
And I try to deflect their teasing by ignoring it, because I'm not as prejudiced as they are, even though I'm pleased nonetheless.
我试图通过忽略来转移他们的嘲笑，因为我不像他们那样有偏见，尽管我仍然很高兴。
It's an acting job, the 32 Degree, and not many guys are good at it.
32 Degrees 是一份表演工作，擅长这个的人并不多。
We are friends and businessmen, colleagues.
我们是朋友、商人、同事。
I sell plumbing and heating supplies, my friend Sammy Gibson is in real estate, and the other, Rick Buckingham, is a Chevy dealer.
我销售管道和供暖用品，我的朋友萨米·吉布森 (Sammy Gibson) 从事房地产行业，另一个瑞克·白金汉 (Rick Buckingham) 是雪佛兰经销商。
We enter the Greek's, a small restaurant and fern bar, pass through the dining room into the bar in back like regulars, because we are regulars, greeting the Greek and his help, small comforts.
我们进入希腊人的一家小餐厅和蕨类酒吧，像常客一样穿过餐厅进入后面的酒吧，因为我们是常客，向希腊人和他的帮助、小舒适打招呼。
Sammy and Rick hit uselessly on one of the waitresses, the pretty little blond kid, and make a crack or two about the new gay waiter who's in the far corner by the kitchen door and can't hear them.
萨米和里克徒劳地攻击了其中一个女服务员，那个漂亮的金发小伙子，并对新来的同性恋服务员发出了一两声响声，后者在厨房门边的角落里听不到他们的声音。
Wise guys.
聪明人。
The Greek says to me, "what's with the greasepaint?"
希腊人对我说：“油彩怎么了？”
"Theatre group," I tell him.
“剧团，”我告诉他。
He's not a Mason.
他不是梅森。
I think he's orthodox Catholic or something.
我认为他是正统天主教徒什么的。
But he knows what we do.
但他知道我们做什么。
As we pass one table in particular, this elderly lady in the group looks me straight in the eyes, which gets my attention because otherwise she's just some old lady.
当我们特别经过一张桌子时，队伍中的一位老太太直视着我的眼睛，这引起了我的注意，因为否则她只是一个老太太。
Then for a split second, I think I know her, but decide not and keep going.
然后一瞬间，我想我认识她，但决定不认识她并继续前进。
She's a large, baggy, bright-eyed woman in her late 70s, possibly early 80s.
她是一位身材高大、身材松垮、眼睛明亮的女性，七十多岁，可能八十多岁。
Old.
老的。
Sammy, Rick, and I belly up to the bar, order drinks, the usuals, comment on the snow outside, and feel safe and contented in each other's company.
萨米、瑞克和我大腹便便地来到酒吧，点了饮料，照常喝，评论外面的雪，在彼此的陪伴下感到安全和满足。
We reflect on our wives and ex-wives and our grown kids, all elsewhere.
我们反思我们的妻子、前妻和我们成年的孩子，所有这些都是在其他地方。
I peek around the divider at her.
我绕过隔板偷看她。
Thin, silver-blue hair, dewlaps at her throat, liver spots on her long, flat cheeks.
银蓝色的薄发，喉咙处有赘肉，长而平坦的脸颊上长着肝斑。
What the hell, an old lady.
什么鬼啊，一个老太婆。
She's with family, some kind of celebration.
她和家人在一起，参加某种庆祝活动。
Two sons, they look like, in their 40s with their wives, and a bored teenage girl, all five of them overweight, dull, dutiful.
他们有两个儿子，看上去四十多岁，和妻子在一起，还有一个无聊的少女，五个人都超重、迟钝、尽职尽责。
In contrast to the old woman, who despite her age, looks smart, aware, all dressed up in a maroon knit-wool suit.
与老妇人形成鲜明对比的是，老妇人尽管年事已高，但看起来很聪明，有意识，穿着栗色的羊毛西装。
Clearly an attractive woman once.
显然曾经是一个有魅力的女人。
I drift from Sammy and Rick, and ask the Greek, "who's the old lady?
我离开了萨米和瑞克，问希腊人：“那位老太太是谁？
What's the occasion?"
什么场合？”
"The old lady's 80th," says the Greek.
“这位老太太已经八十多岁了，”希腊人说。
"We should live so long, right?
“我们应该活这么久吧？
You know her?"
你认识她？”
"No, I guess not." The waitresses and the gay waiter sing "Happy Birthday," making a scene, but the place is almost empty anyhow from the snow, and everybody seems to like it, and the old lady smiles serenely.
“不，我想不是。”女服务员和同性恋服务员唱着“生日快乐”，闹得沸沸扬扬，但无论如何，这个地方几乎空无一人，似乎每个人都喜欢它，老太太平静地微笑着。
I say to Sammy and Rick, "I think I know the old gal from someplace but can't remember where."
我对萨米和里克说：“我想我在某个地方认识那个老女孩，但不记得在哪里了。”
"Customer," says Sammy, munching peanuts.
“顾客，”萨米一边嚼着花生一边说道。
Rick says the same, "customer," and they go on as before.
里克也说了同样的话，“顾客”，然后他们就像以前一样继续。
"Probably an old girlfriend," Sammy adds.
“可能是一个老女朋友，”萨米补充道。
"Ha-ha," I say back.
“哈哈，”我回道。
A Celtics-Knicks game on TV has their attention, double overtime.
电视上的凯尔特人队与尼克斯队的双加时赛引起了他们的注意。
Finally, the Knicks win and it's time to go home, guys.
最后，尼克斯队赢了，是时候回家了，伙计们。
The snow is piling up.
雪正在堆积。
We pull on our coats, pay the bartender, and as we leave, the old lady's party is also getting ready to go.
我们穿上外套，付给酒保钱，当我们离开时，老太太的聚会也准备出发了。
And when I pass their table, she catches my sleeve, says my name, says it with a question mark.
当我经过他们的桌子时，她抓住我的袖子，说出我的名字，带着问号。
"Warren?
“沃伦？
Warren Low?"
沃伦·洛？”
I say, "yeah, hi," and smile, but still I don't remember her.
我说：“是的，嗨，”并微笑着，但我仍然不记得她。
Then she says, "I'm Gail Fortunata.
然后她说：“我是盖尔·福图纳塔。
Warren, I knew you years ago," she says, and she smiles fondly.
沃伦，我几年前就认识你了，”她说道，并深情地微笑着。
And then everything comes back, or almost everything.
然后一切都会回来，或者几乎一切都会回来。
"Do you remember me?" she asks.
“你还记得我吗？”她问。
"Sure, sure, I do.
“当然，当然，我愿意。
Of course I do.
我当然知道。
Gail.
盖尔.
How have you been?
你过得怎么样？
Jeez.
天啊。
It's been a while."
已经有一段时间了。”
She nods, still smiling.
她点点头，仍然微笑着。
"What's that on your face?
“你脸上那是什么？
Make up?"
化妆吗？”
"Yeah, been doing a little theater.
“是啊，一直在做一个小剧场。
Didn't have any cold cream to get it all off," I say, lamely.
没有冷霜可以把它全部清除掉。”我蹩脚地说。
She says, "I'm glad you're still acting." And then she introduces me to her family, like that.
她说：“我很高兴你还在演戏。”然后她把我介绍给她的家人，就这样。
"This is my family."
“这是我的家人。”
"Howdy," I say, and start to introduce my friends Sammy and Rick, but they're already at the door.
“你好，”我说，然后开始介绍我的朋友萨米和瑞克，但他们已经在门口了。
Sammy says, "so long, Warren.
萨米说：“再见，沃伦。
Don't do anything I wouldn't do." And Rick gives a wave, and they're out.
别做我不会做的事。”瑞克挥了挥手，他们就出去了。
"So it's your birthday, Gail.
“所以今天是你的生日，盖尔。
Happy birthday."
生日快乐。”
She says, "why, thank you." The others are all standing now, pulling on their coats, except for Gail, who still hasn't let go of my sleeve, which she tugs, and then says to me, "sit down a minute, Warren.
她说：“为什么，谢谢你。”现在其他人都站起来，穿上外套，除了盖尔，她仍然没有放开我的袖子，她拉了一下，然后对我说，“坐下来，沃伦。
I haven't seen you in, what, 30 years.
我已经有三十年没见过你了。
Imagine."
想象一下。”
"Ma," the son says, "it's late.
“妈妈，”儿子说，“已经很晚了。
The snow."
雪。”
I draw up a chair next to Gail, and letting go of the dumb pretenses, I suddenly find myself struggling to see in her eyes the woman I knew for a few months when I was a kid, barely 21, and she was almost 50 and married, and these two fat guys were her skinny teenage sons.
我在盖尔旁边拉了张椅子，放下了愚蠢的伪装，突然发现自己很难在她的眼中看到那个我小时候认识几个月的女人，当时我还不到21岁，而她已经快50岁了，已经结婚了，而这两个胖子是她瘦弱的十几岁的儿子。
But I can't see through the old lady's face to the woman she was then.
但我无法透过老太太的脸看清她当时的样子。
If that woman is gone, then so is the boy, this boy.
如果那个女人走了，那么那个男孩，这个男孩也随之消失了。
She looks up at one of her sons and says, "Dickie, you go without me.
她抬头看着她的一个儿子，说道：“迪基，你不带我去吧。
Warren will give me a ride, won't you, Warren?" she says, turning to me.
沃伦会载我一程，不是吗，沃伦？”她转向我说道。
"I'm staying at Dickie's house up on the heights.
“我住在迪基位于高处的房子里。
That's not out of your way, is it?"
这不妨碍你，不是吗？”
"No, I'm up on the heights too.
“不，我也在高处。
Alton Woods.
奥尔顿·伍兹。
Just moved into a condo there."
刚搬进那里的公寓。”
Dickie says, "fine," a little worried.
迪基说：“好吧，”有点担心。
He looks like he's used to losing arguments with his mother.
他看起来已经习惯了和母亲争吵失败。
The Greek and his crew start cleaning up while Gail and I talk a few minutes more.
希腊人和他的船员开始清理，盖尔和我又聊了几分钟。
Although her eyes are wet and red-rimmed, she's not teary.
虽然她的眼睛湿漉漉的，眼眶也红了，但她没有流泪。
She's smiling.
她在微笑。
It's as if there are translucent shells over her bright, blue eyes.
她明亮的蓝色眼睛上仿佛有一层半透明的贝壳。
Even so, now, when I look hard, I can glimpse her the way she was, slipping around back there in the shadows.
即便如此，现在，当我仔细观察时，我仍能瞥见她原来的样子，在阴影中溜达。
She had heavy, dark red hair, clear, white skin, smooth as porcelain, broad shoulders.
她有一头浓密的深红色头发，白净的皮肤，光滑如瓷的，宽阔的肩膀。
And she was tall for a woman, almost as tall as I was.
对于一个女人来说，她很高，几乎和我一样高。
I remember exactly, from when she and her husband once took me along with them to a VFW party, and she and I danced while he played cards.
我记得很清楚，有一次她和她丈夫带我去参加一个时装周聚会，我和她跳舞，他打牌。
"When we knew each other, Warren, I was the age you are now."
“当我们认识的时候，沃伦，我就在你现在这个年纪。”
"Yeah, I guess that's so.
“是的，我想是这样的。
Strange to think about, isn't it?"
想起来很奇怪，不是吗？”
"Yeah, divorced.
“是啊，离婚了。
Couple of years now.
现在已经好几年了。
Kids.
孩子们。
Three girls, all grown up.
三个女孩，都长大了。
I'm even a grandpa.
我什至当了爷爷。
It was not one of your happy marriages.
这不是你们幸福的婚姻之一。
Not by a long shot."
绝对不是。”
"I don't think I want to hear about all that."
“我想我不想听到这些。”
"Let's have one drink and one short talk, for old time's sake.
“让我们喝一杯，聊聊旧事吧。
And then you may drive me to my son's home."
然后你就可以开车送我去我儿子家了。”
I say, "fine," and ask the Greek, who's at the register tapping out if it's too late for a nightcap.
我说，“好吧”，然后问那个希腊人，他在收银台敲着门，想喝点睡前酒是否太晚了。
He shrugs.
他耸耸肩。
"Why not?" And Gail asks for a sherry and I order the usual, vodka and tonic.
“为什么不呢？”盖尔要了一杯雪利酒，我点了通常的伏特加和补品。
The Greek scoots back to the bar, pours the drinks himself because the bartender is wiping down the cooler, and returns and sets them down before us.
希腊人迅速回到酒吧，自己倒了饮料，因为调酒师正在擦拭冷却器，然后返回并将它们放在我们面前。
"On the house," he says, and goes back to counting the night's take.
“在房子里，”他说，然后又开始计算当晚的收入。
"It's odd, isn't it, that we never ran into each other before this," she says.
“很奇怪，不是吗，我们之前从未见过面，”她说。
"All these years you came up here to Concord, and I stayed there in Portsmouth, even after the boys left.
“这些年来，你来到康科德，而我则留在朴茨茅斯，即使在孩子们离开之后。
Frank's job was there."
弗兰克的工作就在那里。”
"Yeah, well, I guess 50 miles is a long way sometimes.
“是的，好吧，我想有时 50 英里是很长的路。
How is Frank?" I ask, realizing as soon as I say it that he was at least 10 years older than she and is probably dead by now.
弗兰克怎么样了？”我问道，话一出口，我就意识到他至少比她大十岁，而且现在可能已经死了。
"I want to ask you something, Warren.
“我想问你一件事，沃伦。
I hope you won't mind if I speak personally with you."
我希望你不会介意我亲自与你交谈。”
"No. Shoot." I take a belt from my drink.
“不，开枪。”我从饮料中取出一条腰带。
"I never dared to ask you then.
“那时候我一直不敢问你。
It would have embarrassed you then, I thought, because you were so scared of what we were doing together, so unsure of yourself."
我想，这会让你感到尴尬，因为你对我们一起做的事情感到非常害怕，对自己也没有信心。”
"Yeah, no kidding.
“是的，不是开玩笑。
I was, what, 21.
我那时，什么，21岁。
You were, well, not scary, but let's say impressive.
你，嗯，并不可怕，但可以说令人印象深刻。
Married with kids, a sophisticated woman of the world, you seemed to me.
在我看来，你已婚，有孩子，是一位世故的女人。
And I was this apprentice plumber, working on my first job, away from home, a kid."
我是一名水管工学徒，在远离家乡的时候，做着我的第一份工作。”
"You were more than that, Warren.
“你不仅如此，沃伦。
That's why I took to you so easily.
这就是为什么我这么容易就喜欢上了你。
You were very sensitive.
你非常敏感。
I thought someday you'd become a famous actor.
我以为有一天你会成为一名著名演员。
I wanted to encourage you."
我想鼓励你。”
"You did?" I laugh nervously, because I don't know where this conversation is going and take another pull from my drink and say, "I've done lots of acting over the years, you know.
“你做到了？”我紧张地笑了，因为我不知道这场谈话会走向何方，于是我又喝了一口酒，说道：“这些年来我演了很多戏，你知道。
All local stuff.
都是当地的东西。
Some of it pretty serious.
其中一些相当严重。
No big deal.
没什么大不了的。
But I kept it up.
但我坚持了下来。
I don't do much nowadays, of course.
当然，我现在做的事情并不多。
But you did encourage me, Gail.
但你确实鼓励了我，盖尔。
You did.
你做到了。
And I'm truly grateful for that."
我对此真的很感激。”
She sips her sherry with pursed lips, like a bird.
她像小鸟一样噘起嘴唇，抿着雪利酒。
"Good," she says.
“很好，”她说。
"Warren, were you are virgin then, when you met me?"
“沃伦，当你遇见我的时候，你还是处女吗？”
"Oh, jeez.
“哦，天啊。
Well, that's, that's quite a question, isn't it?" I laugh.
嗯，这真是一个问题，不是吗？”我笑了。
"Is that what you've been wondering all these years?
“这就是你这些年一直想知道的事情吗？
Were you the first woman I ever made love with?
你是我第一个做爱的女人吗？
Wow, that's-- hey, Gail, I don't think anybody's ever asked me that before.
哇，那是——嘿，盖尔，我想以前没有人问过我这个问题。
And here we are, 30 years later." I'm smiling at her, but the air is rushing out of me.
30 年后，我们就在这里。”我对她微笑，但我的呼吸却快要窒息了。
"I just want to know, dear.
“我只是想知道，亲爱的。
You never said it one way or the other.
你从来没有以一种或另一种方式说过。
We shared a big secret but we never really talked about our own secrets.
我们分享了一个大秘密，但我们从未真正谈论过自己的秘密。
We talked about the theater and we had our little love affair and then you went on.
我们谈论了剧院，我们有过一段小小的恋情，然后你就继续了。
And I stayed with Frank and grew old.
我和弗兰克一起变老了。
Older."
年纪大了。”
"You weren't old." "As old as you are now, Warren."
“你本来就不老。” “和你现在一样大了，沃伦。”
"Yeah, but I'm not old." "Well, were you?"
“是啊，不过我还没老。” “那么，你是吗？”
"What, a virgin?" "You don't have to answer if it embarrasses you." I hold off a few seconds.
“什么，处女？” “如果这让你感到尴尬，你就不必回答。”我推迟了几秒钟。
The waitress and the new kid and the bartender have all left, and only the Greek is here, perched on a stool in the bar, watching Nightline.
女服务员、新来的客人和调酒师都离开了，只有希腊人坐在酒吧的凳子上，看《夜线》。
I could tell her the truth or I could lie or I could beg off the question altogether.
我可以告诉她真相，也可以撒谎，或者干脆回避这个问题。
It's hard to know what's right.
很难知道什么是对的。
Finally, I say, "yes, I was.
最后，我说：“是的，我是。
I was a virgin when I met you.
遇见你的时候我还是处女。
It was the first time for me," I tell her.
这对我来说是第一次，”我告诉她。
And she sits back in her chair and looks me full in the face and smiles, as if I've just given her the perfect birthday gift.
她坐在椅子上，满脸微笑地看着我，就好像我刚刚给了她一份完美的生日礼物。
The one no one else thought she wanted.
没有人认为她想要的那个。
[LAUGHTER] The gift she never dared to ask for.
[笑声] 这是她从来不敢要求的礼物。
It's a beautiful smile, grateful and proud, and seems to go all the way back to the day we first met.
那笑容很美丽，带着感激和自豪，仿佛可以追溯到我们第一次见面的那一天。
She reaches over and places her small, crackled hand on mine.
她伸出手，将她那只布满裂纹的小手放在我的手上。
She says, "I never knew for sure.
她说：“我从来都不确定。
But whenever I think back on those days and remember how we used to meet in your room, I always pretend that for you it was the first time.
但每当我回想起那些日子，想起我们在你房间里见面的情景，我总是假装对你来说这是第一次。
I even pretended it back then, when it was happening.
当事情发生时，我什至假装如此。
It meant something to me."
这对我来说意味着一些东西。”
For a few moments, neither of us speaks.
有一会儿，我们谁都没有说话。
Then I break the spell.
然后我打破了咒语。
"What do you say we shove off?
“你说我们推开怎么样？
They need to close this place up and the snow's coming down hard." She agrees, and I help her slide into her coat.
他们需要关闭这个地方，雪会下得很厉害。”她同意了，我帮她穿上外套。
My car is parked only halfway down the block, but it's a slow walk to it because the sidewalk is a little slippery and she's very careful.
我的车只停在街区的中间，但要步行才能到达，因为人行道有点滑，而且她非常小心。
When we're in the car and moving north on Main Street, we remain silent for a while.
当我们坐上车，沿着大街向北行驶时，我们沉默了一会儿。
And finally, I say to her, "you know, Gail?
最后，我对她说：“你知道吗，盖尔？
There's something I've wondered all these years myself."
这些年来我自己一直想知道一件事。”
"Is there?" "Yeah, but you don't have to tell me if it embarrasses you."
“有吗？” “是的，但是如果这让你感到尴尬，你不必告诉我。”
"Warren, dear, you reach a certain age, nothing embarrasses you."
“沃伦，亲爱的，你到了一定的年龄，没有什么能让你感到尴尬的了。”
"What is it?" "OK.
“那是什么？” “好的。
I wondered if except for me you stayed faithful to Frank.
我想知道除了我以外你是否对弗兰克保持忠诚。
And before me."
还有在我面前。”
No hesitation.
毫不犹豫。
She says, "yes, I was faithful to Frank before you and after.
她说：“是的，在你之前和之后我都对弗兰克忠诚。
Except for my husband, you were the only man I loved." I don't believe her, but I know why she has lied to me.
除了我的丈夫，你是我唯一爱的男人。”我不相信她，但我知道她为什么要骗我。
This time it's my turn to smile and reach over and place my hand on hers.
这次轮到我微笑并伸出手放在她的手上。
The rest of the way we don't talk, except for her giving me directions to her son's house, which is a plain brick ranch on a curving side street up by the old armory.
剩下的路我们都没有说话，除了她给我指路去她儿子的房子，那是一个普通的砖砌牧场，位于旧军械库旁边一条弯曲的小街上。
The porch light is on, but the rest of the house is dark.
门廊的灯亮着，但房子的其他地方一片漆黑。
"It's late," I say to her.
“很晚了，”我对她说。
"So it is." I get out and come around and help her from the car and then walk her up the path to the door.
“原来如此。”我下车，绕过去把她从车里扶起来，然后陪她沿着小路走到门口。
She gets her key from her purse and unlocks the door and turns around and looks up at me.
她从钱包里拿出钥匙，打开门，转身抬头看着我。
She's not as tall as she used to be.
她不像以前那么高了。
"I'm very happy that we saw each other tonight," she says.
“我很高兴我们今晚见面，”她说。
"We probably won't see each other again."
“我们可能不会再见面了。”
"You're still a very sweet man, Warren.
“你仍然是一个非常可爱的人，沃伦。
I'm glad of that.
我对此很高兴。
I wasn't wrong about you." I don't know what to say.
我没有看错你。”我不知道该说什么。
I want to kiss her, though.
但我还是想吻她。
And I do.
我确实这么做了。
I lean down, put my arms around her, and kiss her on the lips very gently.
我弯下身子，用双臂搂住她，非常温柔地吻她的嘴唇。
Then a little more.
然后再多一点。
And she kisses me back with just enough pressure against me to let me know that she is remembering everything too.
她也用足够的压力回吻我，让我知道她也记得一切。
We hold each other like that for a long time.
我们就这样抱在一起很久了。
Then I step away and she turns, opens the door, and takes one last look back at me.
然后我走开，她转过身，打开门，回头看了我最后一眼。
She smiles.
她微笑着。
"You've still got makeup on," she says.
“你还化着妆，”她说。
"What's the play?
“有什么戏？
I forgot to ask."
我忘记问了。”
"Oh," I say, thinking fast, because I'm remembering that she's Catholic and probably doesn't think much of the Masons.
“哦，”我快速思考道，因为我记得她是天主教徒，可能不太看重共济会成员。
"Othello," I say.
“奥赛罗，”我说。
"Yes." Still smiling, she gives me a slow, pushing wave with her hand, as if dismissing me, and goes inside.
“是的。”她仍然微笑着，缓慢地向我挥了挥手，好像在打发我走，然后就走了进去。
Driving home, it's all I can do to keep from crying.
开车回家时，我能做的就是不让自己哭出来。
Times come, times gone, times never returning, I say to myself.
时代来了，时代走了，时代一去不复返，我对自己说。
What's here in front of me is all I've got, I decide.
我决定，眼前的一切就是我所拥有的一切。
And as I drive my car through the blowing snow, it doesn't seem like much, except for the kindness that I've just exchanged with an old lady.
当我开着车穿过狂风大雪时，除了我刚刚与一位老太太交换的善意之外，这一切似乎并不算什么。
So I concentrate on that.
所以我专注于此。
Thank you.
谢谢你。
[APPLAUSE] Ira Glass Russell Banks.
[掌声]艾拉·格拉斯·拉塞尔·班克斯。
His story, "The Moor," is published in his latest collection of short fiction, The Angel on the Roof.
他的故事《摩尔人》发表在他最新的短篇小说集《屋顶上的天使》中。
Well, our program was produced today by Julie Snyder and myself, with Todd Bachmann, Starlee Kine, Alex Blumberg, Blue Chevigny, and Jonathan Goldstein.
好吧，我们今天的节目是由朱莉·斯奈德和我本人以及托德·巴赫曼、斯塔莉·凯恩、亚历克斯·布隆伯格、布鲁·切维尼和乔纳森·戈德斯坦制作的。
Contributing editors, Paul Tough, Jack Hitt, Margy Rochlin, Alix Spiegel, Nancy Updike, and consigliere Sarah Vowell.
特约编辑 Paul Tough、Jack Hitt、Margy Rochlin、Alix Spiegel、Nancy Updike 和顾问 Sarah Vowell。
Elizabeth Meister runs our website.
伊丽莎白·梅斯特 (Elizabeth Meister) 负责运营我们的网站。
Production help from Erin Yanke.
艾琳·扬克 (Erin Yanke) 提供制作帮助。
OK Go.
好的，去吧。
Damian Kulash, the cynical one.
达米安·库拉什（Damian Kulash），一个愤世嫉俗的人。
Tim Nordwind, the happy one.
蒂姆·诺德温德，那个快乐的人。
Dan Konopka, the solid one.
丹·科诺普卡（Dan Konopka），一位可靠的人。
Andrew Duncan, the quiet, George Harrison type.
安德鲁·邓肯，安静的乔治·哈里森类型。
[ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS] You can listen to our programs for free on the internet at our website, www.thisamericanlife.org.
[致谢] 您可以在我们的网站 www.thisamericanlife.org 上免费收听我们的节目。
This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
WBEZ management oversight by Torey Malatia, who says to us at the end of each and every show--
WBEZ 的管理监督由 Torey Malatia 负责，他在每场演出结束时都对我们说——
[APPLAUSE] Ira Glass I'm Ira Glass, back next week with more stories of This American Life.
[掌声] Ira Glass 我是 Ira Glass，下周回来，带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
And at our website this week, we held a contest for listeners to remix, re-perform or re-imagine Starlee Kine's break-up song from a few months back.
本周，我们在我们的网站上举办了一场比赛，让听众重新混音、重新表演或重新想象几个月前斯塔莉·凯恩的分手歌曲。
Well, the polls have closed, the votes are in, the ballots are counted.
好吧，投票已经结束，选票已经计入，选票已经清点。
The winners are now at thisamericanlife.org for your listening heartbreak pleasure.
获奖者现已在 thisamericanlife.org 上为您带来聆听心碎的乐趣。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。