150: Kids As Adults - This American Life

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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #150 | January 21, 2000 150: Kids As Adults Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.

00:00 00:00 文字记录分享此美国生活生活伙伴如何收听剧集推荐关于概述员工公告奖学金工作音乐在路上制作电台常见问题解答提交商品联系我们我们的其他节目商品关注我们生活伙伴订阅我们的时事通讯整集切换音频和文字记录同步文字记录 | 内容第 150 集 | 2000 年 1 月 21 日 150：孩子长大成人注：《美国生活》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。

If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.

如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。

Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.

文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。

Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.

请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。

Prologue Ira Glass When Adam was a junior in high school, living in New York, he got invited to this party that he was petrified to go to.

序言艾拉·格拉斯当亚当还是一名高中三年级学生时，住在纽约，他被邀请参加这个他不敢参加的聚会。

The kids not only seemed more grown-up, they talked about how grown-up they were.

孩子们不仅看起来更成熟了，他们还谈论自己是多么成熟。

And when he got there, there was no dancing or goofing around.

当他到达那里时，没有人跳舞或闲逛。

Everyone just sat around a coffee table, about a dozen kids, casually drinking beers, just talking.

每个人都围坐在咖啡桌旁，大约有十几个孩子，随意地喝着啤酒，只是聊天。

I don't remember exactly what we talked about, but I just remember it was all very quiet, and people would sort of nod while you were talking.

我不记得我们具体聊了什么，但我只记得一切都很安静，当你说话时人们会点头。

And during this very grown-up party, a party unlike any Adam had ever been to, a couple got up and left the room for a while.

在这个非常成熟的聚会上，一场与亚当参加过的任何聚会都不一样的聚会，一对夫妇起身离开了房间一会儿。

At some point I realized that they were in the bedroom for quite some time.

不知什么时候，我意识到他们在卧室里待了很长一段时间。

With the door closed.

随着门的关闭。

Adam With the door closed.

亚当门关着。

And I mean, we were 16.

我的意思是，我们当时16岁。

I'm kind of-- you know, nobody was giggling, nobody was observing this fact, nobody was making mention of this.

我有点——你知道，没有人在咯咯地笑，没有人注意到这个事实，没有人提到这一点。

I mean it was just what adults do.

我的意思是这就是成年人所做的事情。

It was just, this is what you do at a party.

只是，这就是你在聚会上所做的事情。

After a while, the boy and girl walked from the bedroom to the bathroom, and they showered together.

过了一会儿，男孩和女孩从卧室走到浴室，一起洗澡。

Then, the boy, wearing a terrycloth bathrobe, rejoined the party.

然后，男孩穿着毛圈布浴袍重新加入了队伍。

And as Adam went to more parties with this crowd, this would happen a lot.

当亚当和这群人一起参加更多的聚会时，这种情况就会发生很多。

A couple would go off, have sex, and then return to the party, all the while everyone acting like this was no big deal at all.

一对情侣会离开，做爱，然后返回聚会，而每个人都表现得这样根本没什么大不了的。

At that time, did you think, OK, well, this is the way that adults act?

当时你有没有觉得，好吧，这就是大人的行为方式吗？

Yeah, it was all so mysterious.

是的，一切都是那么神秘。

I would have kind of bought anything about those things, you know?

我会买一些关于这些东西的东西，你知道吗？

I didn't really-- it seemed to me like this is how sophisticated, cool adults were.

我真的没有——在我看来，这就是成熟、冷静的成年人。

I mean, the crucial thing was nothing was a big deal.

我的意思是，最重要的是没什么大不了的。

Nothing was worth commenting on.

没有什么值得评论的。

Of course, why would you want to be prematurely blase about sex?

当然，你为什么要过早地对性感到厌倦呢？

Well, part of being a kid is wanting to be a grown-up already.

好吧，作为一个孩子的一部分就是想成为一个成年人。

And throughout childhood, from a very early age, you try on various adult behaviors for size.

在整个童年时期，从很小的时候起，你就会尝试各种成人行为来获得尺寸。

You rehearse being an adult long before you get the part full time.

在你获得全职角色之前，你就已经开始练习如何成为一个成年人了。

And sometimes, in these rehearsals, you just get it wrong.

有时，在这些排练中，你可能会出错。

Today in our program, stories of kids trying to act like adults, sometimes by their own choice, sometimes because they have no choice, and what they get right, and wrong.

今天在我们的节目中，讲述了孩子们试图表现得像成年人的故事，有时是他们自己的选择，有时是因为他们别无选择，以及他们做对了什么，做错了什么。

From WBEZ Chicago, and Public Radio International, It's This American Life.

来自芝加哥 WBEZ 和国际公共广播电台的《这就是美国生活》。

I'm Ira Glass.

我是艾拉·格拉斯。

Act One of our program today, I Was a Teenage Ambulance Driver, in which we ask the question, can it be good for you as a kid to see some things that you just don't want to see?

今天我们节目的第一幕，《我是一名青少年救护车司机》，我们在其中提出一个问题，作为一个孩子，看到一些你不想看到的东西对你有好处吗？

Act Two, Househusband at 12.

第二幕，12岁的家庭主夫。

The story of two brothers escaping Vietnam, and how one ended up doing the cooking and cleaning for the other.

两兄弟逃离越南的故事，以及其中一人如何为另一人做饭和打扫卫生的故事。

Act Three, The Miseducation of Josh Frank, in which an average American 17-year-old explains why it's OK to ignore everything you're supposed to like about high school and start your career in the big city.

第三幕《乔什·弗兰克的错误教育》，其中一个普通的 17 岁美国年轻人解释了为什么可以忽略高中时你应该喜欢的一切并在大城市开始你的职业生涯。

Act Four, Angry Young Man, Times Two.

第四幕，愤怒的年轻人，第二次。

What it's like to be a teenager sent to a maximum security prison, and what it's like to be an adult working with kids like that knowing it could have been you?

作为一个青少年被送进戒备森严的监狱是什么感觉？作为一个成年人和这样的孩子一起工作又知道可能是你自己又是什么感觉？

Stay with us.

留在我们身边。

Act one, I was a teenaged ambulance driver.

第一幕，我是一名十几岁的救护车司机。

Mike Paternini has this story, that takes place way back in the late 20th century.

迈克·帕特尼尼 (Mike Paternini) 有一个故事，故事发生在 20 世纪末。

I was a teenage ambulance driver.

我是一名十几岁的救护车司机。

In my Connecticut hometown, people thought it might be wise to put their suburban youngsters to good use.

在我的康涅狄格州家乡，人们认为充分利用郊区的孩子可能是明智之举。

And so post '53, a youth ambulance service was established.

因此，53 年后，青少年救护车服务成立了。

We, the acne-plagued, gum-chewing, beer-sneaking generation-to-be thought this was remarkably wise.

我们这些饱受痤疮困扰、嚼口香糖、偷偷喝啤酒的未来一代人认为这是非常明智的。

One day, you were bumping your back wheel over a curve, nervously trying to parallel park over at the DMV, and the next, you are commanding several tons of bucking red siren emergency love, screaming like a banshee down the interstate.

有一天，你在弯道上撞到了后轮，紧张地试图在DMV平行停车，而第二天，你就指挥着数吨猛烈的红色警笛紧急救援，像女妖一样在州际公路上尖叫。

And everybody, everybody, was curtsying and swerving, and pulling over to let you pass.

每个人，每个人，都行屈膝礼，突然转向，并把车停在路边让你通过。

You checking these strobes, dude?

你检查这些闪光灯吗，伙计？

Adios, suckers.

再见，傻瓜。

The post was housed in an old railroad station that shook any time a Metro north train blew by on the way to Manhattan, or back to New Haven.

该邮局位于一个旧火车站，每当地铁北线火车在前往曼哈顿或返回纽黑文的途中经过时，车站都会震动。

And there we were, this secret cabal of 50 or so high school kids, girls and boys, most of us achievers of one kind or another, most of us on a path to college.

我们就在那里，这个由 50 名左右高中生组成的秘密阴谋，有女孩和男孩，我们中的大多数人都是某种类型的成就者，我们中的大多数人都在上大学的道路上。

Away from the post, we might drink or smoke pot, listen to Neil Young, or The Clash.

远离岗位后，我们可能会喝酒或抽大麻，听 Neil Young 或 The Clash 的音乐。

On a call, there was none of that.

在电话中，没有任何内容。

There were usually four of us riding in the ambulance, an EMT, a gopher, the driver, and often an adult supervisor, though occasionally, the supervisor was just a more experienced high school senior.

救护车上通常有我们四个人，一名急救人员、一名地鼠、司机，通常还有一名成年主管，尽管偶尔，主管只是一位经验更丰富的高中生。

We dressed in white button down shirts and white pants with fluorescent orange jackets.

我们穿着白色系扣衬衫和白色裤子，搭配荧光橙色夹克。

At school, we carried big clunky pagers, and sometimes we were called from class to respond to a car accident, or a stroke, or whatever else might be going wrong with a human body in our town.

在学校里，我们带着又大又笨重的传呼机，有时我们会被叫下课去应对车祸、中风或我们镇上任何可能出现的人体问题。

The person responsible for our teenage ambulance service, the post, was a celebrated man in town named Bud Doble, who had a habit of calling each and every one of us Booby, and usually not as a term of endearment.

负责我们青少年救护车服务的人是镇上一位名叫巴德·多布尔（Bud Doble）的著名人士，他习惯称我们每个人为“布比”（Booby），而且通常不是一种亲切的称呼。

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Booby?" he would roar.

“你到底想做什么，布比？”他会咆哮。

"Did anyone tell you we're dealing with human lives here?" He kept us on the straight and narrow, our very own Patton, and we, his boobies, attended endless training sessions where we learned to do our jobs with military efficiency.

“有人告诉过你我们这里处理的是人命吗？”他让我们保持正直和狭窄，我们自己的巴顿，而我们，他的笨蛋，参加了无休止的训练课程，在那里我们学会了以军事效率完成我们的工作。

Our lives revolved around this old train station, cluttered with Styrofoam coffee cups and our backpacks strewn in every corner.

我们的生活围绕着这个古老的火车站，到处都是聚苯乙烯泡沫塑料咖啡杯，我们的背包散落在每个角落。

On duty until midnight, we'd hang out, waiting for a call, get pizza, flirt.

值班到午夜，我们会出去玩，等电话，买披萨，调情。

We weren't expected to be at home, and the beauty of it was that all this pizza-eating, and flirting, and teenage goofing around was sanctioned by the selfless effort we were making on behalf of our town.

我们不应该待在家里，而美妙之处在于，所有这些吃披萨、调情和青少年的闲逛都得到了我们代表我们的小镇所做的无私努力的认可。

There were times when you felt a little like you were getting away with something huge.

有时候你会觉得自己好像做了一件大事却侥幸逃脱了惩罚。

Other times, you weren't so sure.

其他时候，你不太确定。

Once, I got a beeper call to a classroom at my own school.

有一次，我在自己学校的教室里接到传呼机的电话。

My physics teacher, who was full of quacky bluster during the 50 minutes we spent with him each day, who took exceptional glee in scrawling a C-minus at the top of a pop quiz after you'd bombed, stood alone in his lab, trembling, his nose bleeding uncontrollably, bright red blood streaking his white turtleneck like Chinese characters.

我的物理老师在我们每天和他一起度过的 50 分钟里充满了庸医般的咆哮，当你被炸毁后，他在一个小测验的顶部潦草地写了一个 C-，他非常高兴，他独自站在他的实验室里，浑身颤抖，他的鼻子不受控制地流血，鲜红的血像汉字一样在他的白色高领毛衣上流淌。

He seemed mortified, both by what was happening to him and by who had come to help.

他似乎对发生在他身上的事情和前来帮忙的人感到羞愧。

Later, when he was back to his healthy self, lording his vast knowledge of physics over us, I would sit in the class on a particularly grueling day of him making us feel small, and flash back to that moment when he stood covered in blood.

后来，当他恢复健康，用他渊博的物理知识统治我们时，我会在他特别辛苦的一天坐在课堂上，让我们感到自己很渺小，然后回想起他浑身是血站着的那一刻。

And I don't know, I'm not proud to say, it kind of helped me through.

我不知道，我并不自豪地说，它帮助我度过了难关。

If teenage rebellion is based on the fact that adults are dangerous, that they control you and can get you in trouble, that teachers, and cops, and even your parents , are not like you in any way, but are a different species altogether, what happens when you're put in a position where they're suddenly weak, and you suddenly have the power?

如果青少年的叛逆是基于这样一个事实：成年人是危险的，他们控制着你，会给你带来麻烦，老师、警察，甚至你的父母，在任何方面都不像你，而是完全不同的物种，那么当你被置于他们突然软弱的位置，而你突然拥有权力时，会发生什么？

Can you ever go back to being a teenager again?

你还能回到少年时代吗？

Once, late on a week night, I was on another call outside a bar on the main street of our town.

有一次，一个星期的深夜，我在镇上主要街道上的一家酒吧外接到另一个电话。

When we arrived, a man was down by the shoulder of the road, struggling to get up.

当我们到达时，一名男子倒在路肩上，挣扎着想要站起来。

He'd been hit by a car.

他被车撞了。

He was dirty and drunk, slurring his words.

他浑身脏兮兮，喝醉了，说话含糊不清。

He was clearly hurt, probably had some internal bleeding, though adrenalin and booze had convinced him he was fine.

他显然受伤了，可能有一些内出血，尽管肾上腺素和酒精让他相信自己没事。

I remember holding a flashlight and shining it on him, and him saying, "Get that [BLEEP] light off of me.

我记得拿着手电筒照在他身上，他说：“把[BLEEP]灯从我身上拿开。

I'll be damned if I'm going to have the kiddie docs take me away."

如果我要让那些小医生把我带走，那我就该死了。”

To my surprise, he was my old swim coach, someone whose generosity and ferocity on a pool deck had shaped my early years as a swimmer.

令我惊讶的是，他是我以前的游泳教练，他在泳池甲板上的慷慨和凶猛塑造了我早年的游泳运动员生涯。

And though I hadn't seen him in a few years, he was someone I'd revered.

虽然我已经几年没见过他了，但他是我尊敬的人。

"Coach," I said, "It's Mike Paterniti.

“教练，”我说，“我是迈克·帕特尼蒂。

I was one of your swimmers." "I'm not going," he said, "don't touch me." "Listen, coach, I think it would be best if you came." "I think you can go [BLEEP] yourself," he said.

我是你们的游泳运动员之一。” “我不走，”他说，“别碰我。” “听着，教练，我想你最好来。” “我想你可以自己去[哔]，”他说。

"I was one of your swimmers," I said again, "and you're hurt." He tried to focus, but couldn't.

“我是你们的游泳运动员之一，”我又说道，“而你们受伤了。”他试图集中注意力，但没能集中注意力。

My name didn't register.

我的名字没有被登记。

And why should it have?

为什么它应该有？

He'd been thrown headfirst into an embankment, and had a tuft of sod unwittingly stuck to his head like a sad beret.

他头朝下被扔到路堤上，一簇草皮不知不觉地粘在他的头上，就像一顶悲伤的贝雷帽。

"Get away from me!" he said.

“离我远点！”他说。

"Before I make you hurt."

“在我让你受伤之前。”

Make me hurt?

让我受伤？

It seemed a bizarre thing to say, but I backed off.

这句话听起来很奇怪，但我还是放弃了。

He signed a waiver that he was refusing treatment, and we left him there, broken and beginning to sob when I turned my back on him.

他签署了一份拒绝接受治疗的弃权书，我们把他留在那里，当我背对他时，他开始哭泣。

I remember being confused by that, by his belligerence and vulnerability, by the way he was so completely not the man I once thought he was, the man I'd pinned some hope on, and some sense of my own self.

我记得我对此感到困惑，因为他的好斗和脆弱，因为他完全不是我曾经认为的那个人，那个我寄予希望和自我意识的人。

And I knew that he wasn't sobbing because he'd been hit by a car, or was drunk.

我知道他哭泣并不是因为被车撞了，或者是喝醉了。

Something else had led him to this moment, but I didn't even try to ponder what.

是有别的原因让他走到了这一刻，但我什至没有去思考到底是什么。

One of my brothers, Steve, was in post, too, and after I left for college, he became president, a kind of big deal at the time.

我的一个兄弟史蒂夫也在任职，在我去上大学后，他成为了总统，这在当时是一件大事。

Though he briefly ended up as the whitest angel, my brother was actually more of a rebel than I was in those days.

虽然我哥哥短暂地成为了最白的天使，但他实际上比当时的我更加叛逆。

Recently, I asked him what he remembered of that time.

最近，我问他当时还记得什么。

"The outfits," he said, laughing.

“衣服，”他笑着说。

We started trading stories about the calls we'd been on.

我们开始交换有关我们所接电话的故事。

You know, the one I remember, that I've had recurring memories and dreams of, is this accident up by that really bad 90 degree curve, up by Weburn, you know, on Hollow Tree?

你知道，我记得的那个，我反复回忆和梦到的那个事故，是由那条非常糟糕的 90 度曲线造成的吗？你知道，在空心树上的韦伯恩（Weburn）上方？

With this mother who was driving in a VW Rabbit, and she had two twin boys, four years old.

这位母亲开着一辆大众兔子，她有两个四岁的双胞胎男孩。

And they were kicking each other in the back or something, so she reached back to stop them, and drove right into a stone wall.

他们互相踢对方的后背什么的，所以她向后退去阻止他们，然后直接撞到了一堵石墙上。

And one of the boys was OK, and the other one was hurt really badly.

其中一个男孩没事，另一个男孩伤得很重。

He had a huge swelling in his forehead, really big, and when we came to the scene, I was the EMT.

他的额头肿得很厉害，很大，当我们到达现场时，我是急救人员。

And just this guy who had driven by stopped to see if he could help, and had grabbed the four year old, the hurt one, out of the car, which obviously you're not supposed to do, because we didn't know if he had a neck injury.

就在这个开车路过的家伙停下来看看是否可以提供帮助时，他把受伤的四岁孩子从车里抱了出来，这显然是你不应该做的，因为我们不知道他的颈部是否受伤。

And he came running over to me with this little boy.

他带着这个小男孩向我跑来。

And so I had to grab the kid in my hands, in my arms, and take him into the ambulance.

所以我不得不把孩子抓在手里，抱在怀里，把他带进救护车。

And his mother was a nurse, and she kept saying, just tell me, just tell me what's wrong.

他的母亲是一名护士，她一直说，告诉我，告诉我出了什么问题。

Just tell me, I know something, I know this is serious, I know this is serious.

告诉我，我知道一些事情，我知道这很严重，我知道这很严重。

So my brother had to figure out what to do.

所以我的兄弟必须弄清楚该怎么做。

There were no obvious broken bones or lacerations, which made the situation altogether more ominous.

没有明显的骨折或撕裂伤，这使得情况更加不祥。

He suspected that there might be severe internal injuries, and so they needed to get the kid to the hospital, fast.

他怀疑孩子可能有严重的内伤，需要尽快将孩子送往医院。

I remember his little fingers.

我记得他的小手指。

He was stiff, but his hands were moving.

他身体僵硬，但双手却在动。

And he would he would grab my pinkie and squeeze it tight.

And that was just pretty intense, to think this is up to me, here, maybe.

这真是太强烈了，我认为这也许取决于我。

As it turned out, he ended up dying, of, I think, massive, massive head injuries.

结果，他最终死了，我认为是头部严重受伤。

Brain injuries.

脑损伤。

And I also remember, when I got to the hospital, we wheeled the stretcher off and ran him in, one of the people in the E.R.

我还记得，当我到达医院时，我们推着担架把他送了进去，他是急诊室的一个人。

came out, and said to me, "Well, why didn't you tell us it was this kind of injury, and a head injury, we would have had the brain trauma center set up," and stuff.

出来对我说，“好吧，你为什么不告诉我们这是这种伤害，而且是头部受伤，我们会设立脑外伤中心，”之类的。

And I was like, at that point I was thinking, oh my god.

我当时想，天啊。

If I didn't tell them something I should have told them, and I wasted five minutes that could have saved this kid's life, I was just devastated.

如果我没有告诉他们一些我应该告诉他们的事情，并且我浪费了本来可以挽救这个孩子生命的五分钟，我就会感到震惊。

I know I told them everything that I saw, I know I said that he had a swelling over his head.

我知道我告诉了他们我所看到的一切，我知道我说他的头上肿了。

Whether or not I sufficiently flagged it for them, I don't know.

我不知道我是否为他们充分标记了这一点。

I mean, I don't know.

我的意思是，我不知道。

I felt awful.

我感觉很糟糕。

It was pretty hard to deal with for a little while.

I mean, I can deal with it now.

我的意思是，我现在可以处理它。

And it's not something I think about every day.

这不是我每天都在想的事情。

But I definitely felt guilty that maybe he wouldn't have died, or something.

What's curious is that we never really talked about calls like that.

Not in any great detail, and never to anyone outside of the post, especially our parents.

没有透露任何细节，也没有向职位之外的任何人透露，尤其是我们的父母。

And so my brother's worst calls were bottled and stored in the cellar of his psyche, only to haunt him these years later in bad dreams.

因此，我哥哥最糟糕的电话被装瓶并储存在他心灵的地窖里，只是在多年后的噩梦中困扰着他。

In fact, until now, I had never even asked Steve about another incident that occurred when the two of us were at home, on a day near the end of the school year when I was a senior and he was a junior.

事实上，直到现在，我什至从未向史蒂夫询问过我们两个人在家时发生的另一件事，那是学年快结束的一天，当时我是高年级学生，他是三年级学生。

That afternoon, I was engaged in heavy combat with my youngest brother, Rich, who was eight years old at the time.

那天下午，我和当时八岁的最小的弟弟里奇进行了激烈的战斗。

Rich had uncanny hand-eye coordination, and was a merciless video game player, the supreme universal master of Asteroids.

里奇拥有不可思议的手眼协调能力，是一位无情的电子游戏玩家，也是小行星的最高万能大师。

I had made a promise to myself that before graduating high school, I would find a way to beat him.

And by some cosmic fluke, never to be repeated, I was.

I was creaming him, and neither of us could believe it.

我在给他涂奶油，我们谁也不敢相信。

Which is when our next door neighbor, a woman just older than my mother, burst in.

就在这时，我们的隔壁邻居，一位比我母亲大一点的女人突然闯了进来。

Her 75 year old father had keeled over on the lawn in cardiac arrest.

她 75 岁的父亲因心脏骤停倒在草坪上。

I remember my first thought was, but I'm about to kick Rich's butt.

我记得我的第一个想法是，但我要踢里奇的屁股。

And then I started outside, telling her to get Steve, who was upstairs listening to music in his room.

然后我走到外面，告诉她去找史蒂夫，他正在楼上的房间里听音乐。

I mean, I could probably remember the song I was listening to if I thought.

我的意思是，如果我想的话，我可能会记得我正在听的歌曲。

I think it was probably Bob Marley, Babylon by Bus .

I remember running outside to our neighbor's father, and beginning CPR.

I remember something happening that I didn't expect at all, his ribs separating from his sternum, and breaking easily under the weight of my palm.

我记得发生了一些我完全没有预料到的事情，他的肋骨与胸骨分离，并在我手掌的重量下轻易折断。

A muffled cracking sound.

一声闷响。

I just remember the feel of the guy's beard on my lips.

我只记得那家伙的胡子在我嘴唇上的感觉。

Then you have pretty normal reactions.

然后你就会有很正常的反应。

How could I possibly think a video game is more important, or how could I possibly be angry at being pulled away from listening to a record to have to try to save someone's life?

我怎么可能认为电子游戏更重要，或者我怎么可能因为被拉去听唱片而不得不试图拯救某人的生命而感到愤怒？

But you definitely have those-- I definitely remember having those reactions.

I remember hearing that, in that sort of perfect early summer afternoon, listening to the perfect music, and just coming down the stairs and seeing her face, and knowing that something was going to happen.

我记得在那个完美的初夏午后听过这句话，听着完美的音乐，走下楼梯看到她的脸，就知道有事情要发生了。

Or something had happened, bad.

或者发生了什么事，很糟糕。

It's sort of the same feeling, almost like a little tiny bit of resentment.

类似的感觉，几乎就像一点点怨恨。

Well, that just blew the afternoon in a big way.

嗯，下午的事情让整个下午都变得很糟糕。

And then feeling, of course, real guilty about having that feeling later.

This was the thing about the post.

这就是这篇文章的主题。

It represented two totally discordant and opposite teenage impulses.

On the one hand, we still wanted to act like kids, but then at the same time, we wanted to be adults.

We'd accepted the ultimate adult responsibility, riding in an ambulance and being held accountable for human lives.

I would have been 17 years old at the time of my last serious call.

It was spring of my senior year, and all I wanted was to hang out with my girlfriend-- just get lost, and forget every last adult thing looming on the horizon.

那是我大四的春天，我只想和我的女朋友一起出去玩——只是迷失方向，忘记所有即将出现的成人事物。

You know, the specter of going away to college, and then after that, the requirement of finding some kind of worthy job, and the ensuing money grief, and whatever it was that adults worried about all the time.

你知道，去上大学的恐惧，然后是找到某种有价值的工作的要求，以及随之而来的金钱悲伤，以及成年人一直担心的事情。

But I was on duty, getting ready to go home, actually, when the call came in.

A car accident, out on Pear Tree Point, which juts out into Long Island Sound.

There are huge beautiful trees out there, and a girl not much older than me had run headlong into one of them, drunk.

It was a dark night.

那是一个漆黑的夜晚。

When we arrived, we couldn't find her at first.

当我们到达时，我们一开始并没有找到她。

We were all out looking in the ditch by the road.

And then suddenly, I was at the car.

然后突然，我就到了车旁。

What had been the car, as the whole front end was flattened.

那是什么车，整个前端都被压平了。

I remember somehow opening the jammed front door, and seeing a trapped woman, head down on the steering wheel, her hair long and blonde, her body splattered with blood.

我记得不知怎的，我打开了卡住的前门，看到一个被困的女人，低着头坐在方向盘上，她的头发又长又金发，她的身上溅满了血。

And she was moaning, a low, sickly, almost reflexive moan.

I remember taking her head in my hands to pull traction, and lifting her back, and then almost throwing up at what I saw.

I don't know how to put this gently, but she didn't have a face.

That is, her nose had been driven into her head, and there was a huge gash on her forehead from which something brainy was leaking.

And her jaw hung half-loose.

她的下巴半松垮地挂着。

And her eyes had rolled completely back, were just these white ghostly things reflecting nothing.

In EMT training, you're taught that once you've begun to pull traction, you can't like go.

And so I can't tell you how long I sat face to face with this woman.

Even after we put on a neck brace, I held her head, for hours.

And she moaned, and moaned, and I, too, begin to moan quietly to myself.

The fire department was called, and other ambulances with the capability to administer drugs.

And the jaws of life were used to pry her loose, finally.

Bud Doble came too, as he often did to the bad ones.

After several hours, after a huge crowd had gathered, we got her out and wheeled her to another ambulance.

And since I'd been with her at the beginning, I stayed with her until the end.

I remember standing up on the back fender at the back door as they stripped her naked and shot her full of drugs.

And I remember a stream of her blood running down the floor of that ambulance, over my white Reeboks.

Bud Doble was standing next to me, shaking his head.

Tough one, he said.

很难，他说。

By morning, she was dead.

到早上，她已经死了。

When I got home that night, my dad was up waiting.

And though I wanted to tell him what had happened, I didn't.

Or couldn't.

或者不能。

I don't know why.

我不知道为什么。

I just stood for a while, making small talk, and then I went up to bed.

But here's the thing I remember most about that night.

Somehow, the girl's parents had heard about the accident, and made it to the crash site.

And then they were moving toward the back of the ambulance to see their daughter, the one they'd raised and loved.

Bud Doble glanced over his shoulder, knew exactly who they were, and leaped down.

I remember he wrapped his arms around both of them, talked to them in a low voice, comforting them.

He covered them both up, and led them straight away, the three of them in a bear hug.

Here was this stranger, and they clung to him like Jesus.

I thought about that woman and her parents last week, when I myself was at the hospital for the birth of my first child.

Already, I was imagining a life for him.

我已经在想象他的生活了。

His first words, his first steps, his first day of school, his first bike, his first girlfriend, his first act of rebellion.

I imagined what secret worlds he might occupy one day, and whether he would ever tell his father about them.

我想象着有一天他可能会占据什么样的秘密世界，以及他是否会告诉他的父亲这些秘密。

From our room at the hospital, we happened to look down on the ambulances as they came and went from the emergency room.

在医院的房间里，我们碰巧俯视着来来往往的救护车。

And standing with my one day old son in my arms, I watched.

我怀里抱着刚出生一天的儿子，站在那里看着。

I watched the paramedics wheel in all sorts of people, and return with empty stretchers, joking with each other.

我看着护理人员推着各种各样的人，然后带着空担架回来，互相开玩笑。

I stood in the window with my son in my arms like a man on a beach, watching others bob in a distant ocean, diving on a coral reef.

我站在窗前，怀里抱着儿子，就像一个海滩上的人，看着别人在遥远的海洋里漂浮，在珊瑚礁上潜水。

It was late afternoon, and the sun dropped down behind some low clouds, lighting the parking lot silver.

I watched as an ambulance driver ran to his rig, flipped on his strobes, and floored it, off to some new disaster, to some broken body out there somewhere.

我看到一名救护车司机跑向他的装备，打开闪光灯，然后将其踩在地板上，前往某个新的灾难，前往某个地方的一些破碎的尸体。

It was an old reflex, I admit, but I turned my son from the window and raised his mouth to my ear, just to make sure I could feel his breath.

Mike Paterniti lives in Portland, Maine, with family.

[MUSIC - "ALMOST GROWN" BY CHUCK BERRY]

[音乐 - 查克·贝瑞的《几乎长大了》]

Act Two, Househusband at 12.

第二幕，12岁的家庭主夫。

So what if you made the most important decision of your life when you were 12 years old, and for all the wrong reasons?

When Anh Tuan Hoang was 12, back in 1980, living in Vietnam, his cousin was scheming up a way to escape the country by boat.

It would be 36 people, hidden in a tiny craft.

这将是 36 个人，隐藏在一艘小飞船里。

Anh Tuan's older brother was invited on the trip because he knew how to fix engines, which everyone figured might come in handy.

And Anh Tuan was invited too.

Anh Tuan 也被邀请了。

And he wanted to go, but for reasons that had very little to do with reality, and everything to do with the way that a kid sees the world.

For me, having a chance, an opportunity to travel-- because to travel in Vietnam at the time was extremely difficult.

So just to have an opportunity to leave the city, maybe go to North Vietnam, because we were planning to escape from North Vietnam, I thought it would be a cool thing.

因此，只要有机会离开这座城市，也许去北越，因为我们计划逃离北越，我认为这将是一件很酷的事情。

And then, I thought, escaping, you'll be caught.

然后，我想，逃跑的话，你会被抓住的。

It's not that easy.

这并不容易。

But really, you thought you would get caught and be sent back.

Yeah.

是的。

Ira Glass You didn't actually think you were going to be leaving Vietnam?

Right.

正确的。

Not exactly.

不完全是。

Like in my mind, I didn't think I would be able to.

So for me, it's just like, I love my mom, I can't be separated from her, but this is not really true.

This is a game.

这是一个游戏。

I'm going to go and enjoy the visit, and then be caught, and sent back to my family.

我要去享受这次访问，然后被抓住，送回我的家人身边。

And then my mom has a totally different idea.

然后我妈妈有一个完全不同的想法。

She's thinking, he's leaving, either he make it, I'll never see him again.

I might, you know, in the late, late future.

你知道，我可能会在很晚很晚的将来。

If he get caught, they might kill him.

如果他被抓住，他们可能会杀了他。

Or, you know, the chance of being dead at the sea is great, too.

So she was truly petrified.

所以说，她是真的石化了。

And she didn't want to let me go, because I was really young, and I was a baby.

And then he has to sort of convince, and then my brother and my whole family sort of talked to my mom, and said, mom, look, you know, there's a war going on with Cambodia right now.

然后他必须说服，然后我的兄弟和我的全家与我妈妈交谈，并说，妈妈，你看，你知道，现在柬埔寨正在发生一场战争。

They're drafting young men.

他们正在征召年轻人。

As soon as you reach your 17th birthday, they take you.

And then, plus, if I had stayed behind, I would never been able to get ahead.

And I wouldn't been able to go to college, for example, or to get a decent job.

例如，我将无法上大学，也无法找到一份体面的工作。

So after a lot of convincing, my mom just decided.

She said, OK, you can go, it would be good for your future.

But one thing I remember her telling me, she said, you can have a better future and everything, but you just never find the love that I have for you.

但我记得她告诉我的一件事，她说，你可以拥有更好的未来和一切，但你就是永远找不到我对你的爱。

I'm your mother.

我是你的母亲。

And after that, it was sort of odd, because she didn't really speak to me very much until the day I leave.

It was too difficult for her.

这对她来说太难了。

She's like, pretend that nothing is going to happen.

Now, as an adult, you must know how risky it was.

Is it one out of two people who would get onto a boat wouldn't survive?

Yeah, I mean, the odds of being survive is really, really small.

It's either like I said, the boat is tipped over, you get caught by the government, or you being attacked by pirates.

Pirates?

海盗？

Anh Tuan Hoang I mean, yeah, especially in South Vietnam.

Were you scared?

你害怕吗？

Anh Tuan Hoang I don't know if I can say I was scared.

I mean, I was excited.

我的意思是，我很兴奋。

I don't think I really got scared until I was on the boat.

Then reality sort of sunk in.

然后现实就陷入了困境。

So what happened when you got on the boat?

那么当你上船时发生了什么？

I got really sick.

我真的病了。

That was the first thing.

这是第一件事。

And I just got really sick.

我刚刚病得很厉害。

I mean, I have never been on a boat going to the ocean.

I've been on river boats in Saigon, no big deal.

我在西贡坐过河船，没什么大不了的。

And I remember praying to just about all the saints, whomever I know just from growing up, so that I could die.

Literally, I was like, just let me die.

从字面上看，我当时想，就让我死吧。

This is just awful, I want to die.

这太可怕了，我想死。

And the first few days we did have some food that we take with us.

最初几天我们确实带了一些食物。

We thought that it would take us six days to get from Hai Phong to Hong Kong.

But this ended up taking us a lot longer than that because the boat broke down a lot, and also we encountered a storm.

但这最终花费了我们更长的时间，因为船经常抛锚，而且我们还遇到了暴风雨。

We were stranded in an island for ten days.

我们在一个岛上被困了十天。

We had a little bit of food left for the island, but just barely.

Like maybe a few handful of rice that we make very thin soup to drink.

But we managed to find all kind of weird sea animals, and we ate those.

I tried to eat grass, at one point, because I was so hungry.

And found out that you can eat a lot of vegetation, you just can't eat grass.

I don't know why.

我不知道为什么。

It's like it tastes horrible, you can't even swallow it.

And so you had planned that it would only take 6 days.

How long did it end up taking?

最终花了多长时间？

Almost two months.

快两个月了。

Ira Glass So two months go by, and where did you end up?

Well, we end up in Hong Kong.

嗯，最后我们还是到了香港。

And of course, you know, they know we were refugee.

We'd looked like we were refugee.

我们看起来就像是难民。

The boat was awful.

船很糟糕。

So they took us into shore, into a warehouse.

所以他们把我们带到岸上，进入一个仓库。

And basically bathed us, making sure that we were free of lice, and making sure that we had proper check-up, medical check-up.

基本上给我们洗澡，确保我们没有虱子，并确保我们接受适当的检查、医疗检查。

Then they take us to another camp, and the first month or so, we get some money to just get by, for the first month or so.

To buy food.

去买食物。

Anh Tuan Hoang To buy food.

Anh Tuan Hoang 去买食物。

But then after the first month, you have to work.

但第一个月之后，你就必须工作了。

And they will try to help you find jobs, outside in Hong Kong.

他们会尽力帮助您在香港以外地区找到工作。

Of course, the job that you would be getting paid very, very little.

I'm talking like, maybe $0.50 cents an hour, or something.

我是说，也许每小时 0.50 美分，或者其他什么。

Now, for you, you were 12 years old.

现在，对于你来说，你已经12岁了。

Is this is the first time you had a job?

这是您第一次参加工作吗？

Well, I didn't have to work.

嗯，我不用工作。

Ira Glass You didn't have to work.

艾拉·格拉斯（Ira Glass）：你不必工作。

I didn't have to work.

我不需要工作。

But my brother did, because he have to take care of me.

And since like I said we weren't really close, we didn't interact that well, I just felt left out, in a way.

正如我所说，我们并不是很亲密，我们的互动也不是很好，我只是觉得在某种程度上被排除在外。

But then I felt like I had a responsibility, and that is to take care of my brother, in terms of making sure he get food, he get food to take to lunch, making sure his clothes are clean.

但后来我觉得我有责任，那就是照顾我的兄弟，确保他有食物，有食物带去吃午餐，确保他的衣服干净。

And you're talking about having two pair of jeans, or two shirts.

你说的是两条牛仔裤或两件衬衫。

So you have to do them daily.

所以你必须每天都做。

You have to wash your clothes, you have to cook, go to the market.

你必须洗衣服、做饭、去市场。

You have no refrigerator.

你没有冰箱。

I mean, you're talking about living in a concentration camp, again, with bunk beds.

我的意思是，你又说的是住在集中营里，有双层床。

And that would be your room, two people.

那就是你的房间，两个人。

And you would hang pots and pans, and your clothes, everything, within that bunk bed.

你会把锅碗瓢盆、衣服和所有东西都挂在双层床上。

And at first, I was very scared.

起初，我非常害怕。

I mean, I didn't know a word of Chinese.

我的意思是，我不懂中文。

Here, I have to go out of the camp, and say, I want a pound of beef, I want a kilo of rice.

在这里，我必须走出营地，说，我想要一磅牛肉，我想要一公斤大米。

And it was hard.

这很难。

So I did a lot of that through pointing and hand signals.

所以我通过指点和手势做了很多事情。

No. I mean, growing up, I was sort of chased away from coming into the kitchen.

不，我的意思是，在成长过程中，我有点被赶进厨房。

My mom and sister were like, go, you know, go play somewhere.

我妈妈和姐姐说，去吧，你知道，去某个地方玩。

So I never really learned.

所以我从来没有真正学过。

So when I got there, it was like, basically, I have to do it.

所以当我到达那里时，基本上，我必须这样做。

Otherwise, we'll be hungry.

不然我们会饿死的。

We can't afford to purchase already made meal.

我们买不起已经做好的饭菜。

So I would ask people in the camp.

所以我就去问营地里的人。

I would watch them, watch older people cook, and learn how to do it.

我会观察他们，看老年人做饭，并学习如何做。

Did you like the independence of shopping and cooking, and having this adult kind of life?

您喜欢独立购物和做饭，喜欢这种成年人的生活吗？

Not really, because at that point, all I wanted to do was to have fun.

不完全是，因为那时我想做的就是玩得开心。

For me, you have to understand, Hong Kong was new.

对我来说，你必须明白，香港是新的。

It was kind of, wow, a huge city.

哇，那是一座巨大的城市。

And you are seeing 60 story buildings, and you are seeing all the neon lights, and the airplane, huge airplane flying.

你会看到 60 层的建筑，你会看到所有的霓虹灯，还有飞机，巨大的飞机在飞行。

You know, the camp was very close to the airport.

你知道，营地离机场非常近。

You are curious.

你很好奇。

You wanted to go out and just check around.

你想出去看看。

It didn't cost anything.

它没有花费任何费用。

You can walk, play with your friend.

你可以和你的朋友一起散步、玩耍。

Do you think it was good for you to have to be such a grown up at such a young age?

你觉得你这么年轻就长成这样对你有好处吗？

You know, my friends ask me that question a lot, and I am not sure how I would answer it, exactly.

你知道，我的朋友经常问我这个问题，我不确定我该如何回答。

I think, I guess being forced to grow up so fast sometimes is sort of-- this is how I feel.

我想，我想有时被迫如此快速地成长是一种——这就是我的感受。

It's probably different with different people.

可能对于不同的人来说是不同的。

But I feel it left you feeling kind of insecure most of the time, because you never feel adequately supported by your parents guiding you through different things, or saying don't do this, do that.

但我觉得这会让你在大多数时候感到有点不安全，因为你从来没有感受到父母的充分支持，指导你完成不同的事情，或者说不要这样做，这样做。

And so I always feel like I'm a child, in some way.

所以在某种程度上我总是觉得自己还是个孩子。

I'm like 32, and sometimes I just feel like I'm a little kid.

我已经32岁了，有时我觉得自己像个小孩子。

Knowing now what happened to you once you left in the boat, would you make the same choice again?

现在知道你离开船上时发生的事情，你还会做出同样的选择吗？

You know, probably not.

你知道，可能不会。

Well of course, you can never say what happens to you, but I don't know.

当然，你永远无法说出你身上发生了什么，但我不知道。

I just feel that if I have to do it, I probably wouldn't do it.

我只是觉得如果我必须这样做，我可能不会这样做。

Why?

为什么？

Anh Tuan Hoang I don't know, I just think-- well, it's kind of a hard question, because I had to do it, so I did it.

Anh Tuan Hoang 我不知道，我只是想——嗯，这是一个很难回答的问题，因为我必须这么做，所以我就这么做了。

Just because I never get to see my mother.

只是因为我再也见不到我的妈妈了。

She passed away.

她去世了。

After I left.

我离开后。

This was after the year I graduate from college.

那是我大学毕业后的那一年。

I receive news that she passed away.

我收到她去世的消息。

So I regret that.

所以我对此感到遗憾。

I don't think you can have everything in life.

我不认为你可以拥有生活中的一切。

Just back to what my mother said.

回到我妈妈说的话。

You know, you can achieve all of this.

你知道，你可以实现这一切。

You can have all the wealth, life can offer you all of these good things, but then sometimes you have to sacrifice a chunk of other things, like that love that your family can give you.

你可以拥有所有的财富，生活可以为你提供所有这些美好的事物，但有时你必须牺牲一些其他的东西，比如你的家人可以给你的爱。

Ahn Tuan Hoang lives in Chicago.

Ahn Tuan Hoang 住在芝加哥。

A Catholic charity brought him to the United States after a year and a half in Hong Kong.

在香港呆了一年半后，一家天主教慈善机构将他带到了美国。

He's never been back to Vietnam.

他再也没有回过越南。

Coming up: anger and its uses, high school and its uses, and more.

即将推出：愤怒及其用途、高中及其用途等等。

That's in a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.

一分钟后，国际公共广播电台将继续我们的节目。

It's This American Life .

这就是美国生活。

I'm Ira Glass.

我是艾拉·格拉斯。

Each week on our program, of course, we choose a theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.

当然，每周我们的节目都会选择一个主题，为您带来有关该主题的各种不同类型的故事。

Today's program, stories of kids acting like adults-- some by choice, some because they're forced to.

今天的节目讲述了孩子们表现得像大人一样的故事——有些是自愿的，有些是被迫的。

We've arrived at act three of our program.

我们已经进入了计划的第三幕。

Act three, The Miseducation of Josh Frank.

第三幕，乔什·弗兰克的错误教育。

This is another story of a young person making a huge, life-changing decision about his own fate, while still very young.

这是另一个故事，讲述了一个年轻人在还很年轻的时候就自己的命运做出了一个巨大的、改变人生的决定。

In this case, 13 years old.

在这种情况下，13岁。

Hillary Frank tells the story, about her own little brother.

希拉里·弗兰克讲述了她自己弟弟的故事。

This is what it sounds like when I call home to talk to my parents.

这就是我打电话回家与父母交谈时的感觉。

[MUSIC - TRUMPET SCALES] Whoever picks up has to go to another room, so they can hear me.

[音乐-小号音阶] 接电话的人必须去另一个房间，这样他们才能听到我的声音。

It's been like this for six years.

这样的日子已经六年了。

This is my 17 year old brother preparing for his future.

这是我 17 岁的弟弟正在为他的未来做准备。

I try and practice about five hours a day, four to five hours a day.

我尝试每天练习大约五个小时，每天四到五个小时。

Mom and Dad ever have to tell you to practice trumpet?

爸爸妈妈曾经叫过你去练习小号吗？

No. Now, these days, they have to tell me to stop practicing.

不，现在，这些天，他们不得不告诉我停止练习。

It might get to be like 11:00 or 12:00 and they want to go to bed, and they think the neighbors will be mad, so they have to tell me to stop.

可能会到 11:00 或 12:00，他们想睡觉，他们认为邻居会生气，所以他们必须告诉我停下来。

Josh is training to be a professional trumpeter.

乔什正在接受专业小号手的训练。

He calls the incessant practicing his insurance to guarantee he'll have the skills he needs in the future.

他称不断练习他的保险是为了保证他拥有未来所需的技能。

During the week, he goes to a regular public high school.

工作日期间，他去一所普通公立高中。

But on Saturdays, he devotes 15 hours of his day to Juilliard's pre-college program.

但每周六，他都会花 15 个小时参加茱莉亚音乐学院的预科课程。

Basically, it's like cramming everything you get in one week at a conservatory into one day.

基本上，这就像把你在温室一周所学到的一切都塞进一天里。

Josh is pretty obsessive about his horn.

乔什对他的号角非常着迷。

He brings it to school every day, just in case a class is canceled.

他每天都会把它带到学校，以防课程取消。

When our family went on vacations, Josh was sure to have his trumpet.

当我们全家去度假时，乔什肯定会带着他的小号。

Then he got to a point where he told our parents he'd rather not go on vacation anymore.

然后他告诉我们的父母他不想再去度假了。

A week off could be better spent practicing.

一周的休息时间最好花在练习上。

Five years ago, Josh gave up being a kid to play the trumpet.

五年前，乔什放弃了童年，转而吹小号。

I can remember telling my friends what I was going to be doing.

我记得告诉我的朋友我要做什么。

It was at the beach, and we were rollerblading, which was like the thing I did in 8th grade.

那是在海滩上，我们滑旱冰，就像我八年级时所做的那样。

We were gliding around the parking lot, and I was like, guys, guess what, I got into this pre-college program.

我们在停车场周围滑行，我当时想，伙计们，猜猜看，我参加了这个大学预科课程。

And some of them didn't even know what Juilliard was.

他们中的一些人甚至不知道茱莉亚学院是什么。

Then it came, well, I guess you won't really be around on Saturdays.

然后我想，周六你不会真的在了。

And I was like, I guess not.

我想，我想不是。

And it was difficult.

这很困难。

The music was more important to me.

音乐对我来说更重要。

And even if it does involve a sacrifice, I realized you couldn't have it both ways.

即使它确实涉及牺牲，我也意识到你不能两全其美。

[MUSIC - TRUMPET] Hillary Frank In the first few years of high school, Josh used to call his friends to see what he was missing.

[音乐 - 小号] 希拉里·弗兰克 (Hillary Frank) 在高中的最初几年，乔什常常打电话给他的朋友，看看他错过了什么。

They would tell him, oh, we just hung out until 3:00 in the morning, driving around or sitting at the diner, not very exciting.

他们会告诉他，哦，我们只是闲逛到凌晨 3:00，开车四处转转或坐在餐馆里，不是很令人兴奋。

So Josh figured he wasn't missing much.

所以乔希认为他并没有错过太多。

When they invited him, he couldn't go.

当他们邀请他时，他不能去。

After a while, they stopped inviting him.

过了一段时间，他们就不再邀请他了。

It wasn't until junior year that we just never saw anything of each other.

直到大三，我们才再没见过面。

This is Eric, one of Josh's old friends.

这是埃里克，乔什的老朋友之一。

They used to play in orchestra together at school.

他们曾经在学校一起在管弦乐队中演奏。

And then this year, I don't know.

然后今年，我不知道。

I meant to call him at the beginning of, end of summer, and I just never got around to it.

我本想在夏初、夏末给他打电话，但一直没抽出时间。

And then I think we might have talked once or twice.

然后我想我们可能已经谈过一两次了。

Oh yeah, we played Frisbee at the beach a couple times.

哦，是的，我们在海滩玩了几次飞盘。

But then school started, Juilliard started, and Josh gets a little consumed.

但后来学校开学了，茱莉亚音乐学院开学了，乔什有点疲惫不堪。

It's a relationship riddled with formalities, and there's really little substance left.

这是一种充满形式的关系，几乎没有什么实质内容。

I got together with Eric and two other kids Josh has known since elementary school-- Katie and David.

我和埃里克以及乔什从小学起就认识的另外两个孩子——凯蒂和大卫聚在一起。

I wanted to know if they thought he was missing out.

我想知道他们是否认为他错过了。

But like Eric, Katie and David said it was hard for them to talk about Josh.

但和埃里克一样，凯蒂和大卫也表示，他们很难谈论乔什。

They told me they don't know him very well anymore.

他们告诉我他们不再了解他了。

They all agreed.

他们都同意了。

It's hard to put a label on what he's missed.

很难给他错过的东西贴上标签。

All it is is a few hours of chilling time each week, when nothing really happens.

只不过是每周有几个小时的放松时间，什么也没有发生。

But it all adds up.

但这一切加起来。

Yeah, I'd say he's missing out on things, obviously, because he's not there.

是的，我想说他显然错过了一些事情，因为他不在那儿。

But if you asked, if he asked us what we did in a typical weekend, it wouldn't be a lot of great, life changing things.

但如果你问，如果他问我们在一个典型的周末做了什么，那不会有很多伟大的、改变生活的事情。

But I think on a whole, over a long period of time, he misses out on getting closer with friends that he could.

但我认为总的来说，在很长一段时间里，他错过了与朋友建立亲密关系的机会。

As our curfew was extended, we would stay out till 12:00 let's say.

由于宵禁延长，我们会在外面待到 12:00。

On Friday nights, he'd have to say at 10:00 or something, he'd say, OK, I'm going to Juilliard tomorrow, so I'll see you guys later.

周五晚上，他必须在 10:00 左右说，他会说，好吧，我明天要去茱莉亚音乐学院，所以稍后见。

So that's two hours for us to kill without Josh, and eventually that adds up to a lot of hours to kill without Josh.

所以在没有乔什的情况下我们需要两个小时的时间，最终加起来就是在没有乔什的情况下要花很多个小时。

Eventually that leads to, I think, it leads to Josh feeling alienated from his friends.

我认为，最终这会导致乔什感到与他的朋友疏远。

[MUSIC - TRUMPET] Hillary Frank When Josh was in 8th grade and told me what he wanted to do, I worried about him, about what he was giving up.

[音乐 - 小号]希拉里·弗兰克当乔什八年级时告诉我他想做什么时，我担心他，担心他放弃了什么。

I thought he should have a normal high school experience, even though like a lot of people, I hated high school.

我认为他应该有一个正常的高中经历，尽管像很多人一样，我讨厌高中。

I hated it so much I left a year early.

我非常讨厌它，所以我提前一年离开了。

But somehow, the myth of high school is so powerful that even those of us who despised it think that you're missing something important if you don't go.

但不知何故，高中的神话是如此强大，以至于即使我们这些鄙视高中的人也会认为，如果你不去高中，你就会错过一些重要的东西。

Josh goes to the same high school I did, and the time I think it's most painful for him is at lunch.

乔什和我在同一所高中，我认为对他来说最痛苦的时间是午餐时间。

It does suck.

确实很糟糕。

Basically, at every lunch period, lunch is like the big social time during school.

基本上，在每个午餐时间，午餐就像学校里的大型社交时间。

And I don't like classes.

而且我不喜欢上课。

I don't like my math class.

我不喜欢我的数学课。

I don't like going to that stuff.

我不喜欢去那种事。

But the thing I most dread is lunch, because I have to figure out what I'm going to do for that half an hour.

但我最害怕的是午餐，因为我必须弄清楚这半个小时我要做什么。

In the past, when I have sat at lunch with people, it's really awkward for me, because they're talking about what they are doing or what they're going to do.

过去，当我和人们坐在一起吃午餐时，这对我来说真的很尴尬，因为他们正在谈论他们正在做什么或将要做什么。

And I never feel included, which kind of separates me.

我从来没有感到被包容，这让我与众不同。

And it's really painful.

这真的很痛苦。

So the way I deal with it is to get into music more.

所以我处理这个问题的方法就是更多地投入到音乐中。

Like maybe I'll practice during lunch.

也许我会在午餐时练习。

Instead of eating, I'll eat when I get home.

我不吃饭，而是回家后才吃。

[MUSIC - TRUMPET] Hillary Frank Today, all of Josh's close relationships are with other musicians.

[音乐 - 小号] 希拉里·弗兰克 (Hillary Frank) 如今，乔什 (Josh) 的所有亲密关系都与其他音乐家有关。

They connect easily, without having to explain their motivations for working so hard.

他们很容易建立联系，无需解释他们如此努力工作的动机。

And they have their own social scene, although it's not typical of kids their age.

他们有自己的社交场景，尽管这对于同龄的孩子来说并不常见。

My friend often throws parties out of his apartment called sight reading parties.

我的朋友经常在他的公寓外举办聚会，称为视奏聚会。

It's mostly string players and piano players who get together and just read music.

大多数是弦乐演奏家和钢琴演奏家聚在一起阅读音乐。

And then when you're not reading, you just hang out and have a good time and listen to the music.

当你不读书的时候，你就出去玩，听听音乐，享受美好时光。

You're describing this as your favorite social experience, and it's doing exactly what you would be doing if you were working in your ideal job.

您将其描述为您最喜欢的社交体验，并且它所做的正是您在从事理想工作时会做的事情。

Totally.

完全。

Hillary Frank Back when he was little, Josh took violin and piano, and our mom used to set the timer in the kitchen to make sure he practiced for half an hour.

希拉里·弗兰克（Hillary Frank）小时候，乔什（Josh）学小提琴和钢琴，我们的妈妈常常在厨房里设置计时器，以确保他练习半个小时。

He quit those instruments.

他放弃了那些乐器。

It was just torture, getting him to sit for that long.

让他坐那么久简直就是一种折磨。

But with the trumpet, it's almost as if he can't help himself.

但有了小号，他就几乎无法自拔了。

I can't explain it.

我无法解释。

It's just, it was right.

只是，这是对的。

It was just meant to happen.

这本来就是注定要发生的。

But I'm going to press you on this a little bit more.

但我会在这个问题上再向你施加一点压力。

Why, what was so different about it?

为什么，有什么不同呢？

There had to be some difference.

一定有一些区别。

Was it because you were using your mouth, or?

是因为你用嘴了吗？

I think it was the sound.

我认为是声音。

Just the sound that the trumpet made, I always thought was really beautiful.

只是喇叭发出的声音，我一直觉得非常美妙。

It sounds really warm, and you can really sing on it.

听起来很温暖，你真的可以用它来唱歌。

You can be the soprano, or you can be in the orchestra, and be the biggest pig, and when you're playing Wagner, just play really loud and really brilliantly.

你可以成为女高音，也可以成为管弦乐队的一员，成为最大的猪，当你演奏瓦格纳时，演奏得非常大声，非常出色。

Just to be a part of something like that is really special.

能够成为这样的事情的一部分真的很特别。

[MUSIC - TRUMPET] Hillary Frank It's amazing to adults when a 13 year old announces he or she has made a major life decision, and then sticks with it.

[音乐 - 小号] 希拉里·弗兰克 (Hillary Frank) 当一个 13 岁的孩子宣布他或她做出了人生的重大决定并坚持下去时，这对成年人来说是令人惊奇的。

One of the most adult things you can do is make a choice.

你能做的最成熟的事情之一就是做出选择。

Give up something fun in favor of something else.

放弃一些有趣的事情而转而去做其他事情。

Though Josh says he won't really feel like an adult until he's doing his own laundry, getting his own groceries, ironing his own dress shirt before performances, living on his own.

尽管乔什说，除非他自己洗衣服、自己买杂货、在演出前自己熨烫自己的礼服衬衫、自己生活，否则他不会真正感觉自己像个成年人。

Hilary Frank is an art student living in New York City.

希拉里·弗兰克是一名住在纽约市的艺术学生。

[MUSIC - "I AM A CHILD" BY NEIL YOUNG]

[音乐 - 尼尔·杨的《我是一个孩子》]

Act 4, Angry Young Man, Times Two.

第四幕，愤怒的年轻人，第二次。

This is the story of two people, one in his late teens, one in his late 50's.

这是两个人的故事，一个十几岁，一个五十多岁。

And we'll start with the older man.

我们将从年长的男人开始。

Willie Ross grew up in Arkansas in the 1940's, picked cotton from the time he was eight.

威利·罗斯 (Willie Ross) 于 20 世纪 40 年代在阿肯色州长大，从八岁起就开始采摘棉花。

He was a big strong kid.

他是一个坚强的大孩子。

And we're going to field.

我们要去野外。

I was going out there with my mother at five, six, seven years old.

我五岁、六岁、七岁的时候就和妈妈一起去那里。

And I had fast hands, I noticed, and because watching her, you had to gather cotton real fast, because how great a cotton picker she was.

And when I got 12, I was the only kid was picking 250 pound at 12 years old.

当我12岁的时候，我是唯一一个在12岁时摘250磅重的孩子。

When Willie Ross was 13, his stepfather died, and just months later, his mother died too, of spinal meningitis.

威利·罗斯 13 岁时，他的继父去世了，几个月后，他的母亲也因脊髓性脑膜炎去世。

And after the funeral, Willie Ross headed back to the family's house in Helena, Arkansas.

葬礼结束后，威利·罗斯回到了位于阿肯色州海伦娜的家。

When I caught the bus and went back to Helena, when I got to my address, which was 1136 Pecan Street, I looked there and the house was empty.

There was no furniture, there was nothing.

没有家具，什么也没有。

One of his sisters, who was pregnant and in the 12th grade, had taken all the furniture and went to live with her boyfriend.

They had moved away, and no one took me in.

他们搬走了，没有人收留我。

I mean, I didn't know anything, and they had their own life.

And I guess they was telling me about steel mills.

我猜他们是在告诉我有关钢铁厂的事情。

Some of my family figured that I could get a job.

I was big for my age, but I did not want that.

就我的年龄而言，我身材魁梧，但我不想那样。

Here's how he made it on his own, as a freshman in high school.

His sister's boyfriend helped him rent a room in town, another sister, he says, sent him $24 a month.

Of that, 12 covered his rent.

其中，12 美元用于支付房租。

He learned to budget, he washed his own clothes, made his own meals.

他学会了制定预算，自己洗衣服，自己做饭。

People from church looked out for him.

教堂里的人都很关心他。

Boy Scouts was a big part of his life all through school.

He played sports.

他参加体育运动。

He turned to God.

他转向上帝。

And he supported himself with a series of jobs that relied on raw physical strength.

他通过一系列依靠体力的工作养活自己。

He worked on an ice truck, on a beer truck, on a soda truck, carrying heavy crates of bottles.

And he boxed.

他打拳击。

At 5'11", I didn't have the arm reach, but I was powerful, and I was quick.

So what I did, I found that people would notice me, and give me hugs, if I'd be good in sports.

Beating people up.

打人。

I mean, I thought it was crazy.

我的意思是，我觉得这太疯狂了。

I said, here I am, nobody knows me as a person.

我说，我在这里，没有人认识我这个人。

But they love me as a violent animal.

但他们爱我，就像爱暴力动物一样。

And I thought it was crazy, but you know, unfortunately, that's where I got my love, because everybody's attention came to me in sports.

And I had a lot of hurt in my heart, because when your mother die, you are angry.

And you wonder why other people got mothers, and you couldn't.

I couldn't understand that.

我无法理解这一点。

And so boxing, I just enjoyed beating them up.

所以拳击，我只是喜欢打败他们。

So you were pretty angry as a teenager.

所以你十几岁的时候就很生气。

When did that turn?

什么时候变成这样了？

I don't think it turned.

我觉得没转啊

I'm still fighting it.

我还在抗争。

You know, every day I think about it.

你知道，我每天都在想这件事。

He played football in high school, and was just as violent a football player as he was a boxer, he says.

He went to college on a football scholarship, played pro ball for the Buffalo Bills, winning two championships on a team led by Jack Kemp.

他凭借橄榄球奖学金进入大学，为布法罗比尔队打职业球，并在杰克·坎普领导的球队中赢得了两次冠军。

After that, he became a cop, and finally ended up an assistant superintendent at the Audi Home, a juvenile detention center in Chicago.

此后，他成为一名警察，最后成为芝加哥青少年拘留中心奥迪之家的助理总监。

Which is, as far as anybody seems to know, the largest juvenile lockup in the world.

据大家所知，这是世界上最大的青少年看守所。

Sometimes as many as 600 kids behind bars, many of them full of anger.

有时多达 600 名儿童被关进监狱，其中许多人充满了愤怒。

And full of anger for justifiable reasons, understandable reasons.

并且出于正当理由、可以理解的理由而充满愤怒。

Like Mr. Ross, back when he was their age.

就像罗斯先生一样，当他在他们这个年纪的时候。

I really was angry, and I really hurt, because I couldn't understand why none of my people took me in.

我真的很生气，也很受伤，因为我不明白为什么我的人没有人接纳我。

And I was a good kid.

我是一个好孩子。

And I see these kids, it's happening to them.

我看到这些孩子，这正在发生在他们身上。

These kids here.

这些孩子在这里。

Willie Ross These kids who locked up here in juvenile detention center.

威利·罗斯这些孩子被关在少年拘留中心。

It happened to them.

这发生在他们身上。

And I stress them, it happened to me.

我向他们强调，这发生在我身上。

But I've told them this.

但我已经告诉他们了。

Set a goal.

设定一个目标。

Get an education.

接受教育。

One of the many kids Mr. Ross told his stories to was Terence Golden.

特伦斯·戈尔登是罗斯先生讲故事的众多孩子之一。

Terence describes his own life this way.

特伦斯这样描述自己的生活。

Until he was nine, he says, he did well in school, things were fine.

他说，直到九岁之前，他在学校表现都很好，一切都很好。

And then it all fell apart, when his father died of cancer.

但当他的父亲死于癌症时，一切都崩溃了。

From there, that's like where the problems begin, you know, it's been hard since then.

从那时起，这就像问题开始的地方，你知道，从那时起就一直很困难。

He died, my brother got killed, my cousin died, my grandmother died, so it's been a lot of trials and tribulations.

他死了，我哥哥死了，我表弟死了，我祖母死了，所以经历了很多考验和磨难。

And then what happened in your life after that?

那之后你的生活发生了什么？

How did things change for you?

你的情况发生了怎样的变化？

I started to change mentally, you know?

我的心理开始发生变化，你知道吗？

Go about things the wrong way, don't express myself, hold in anger, and there's a build up.

以错误的方式做事，不表达自己，压抑愤怒，就会积聚起来。

It's like, when it's ready to go, it's like a volcano blow.

就像，当它准备好出发时，就像火山爆发一样。

I was the closest person in my family I've ever been close to.

我是家里最亲近的人。

I was closer to him than my mother.

我和他的关系比我母亲还要亲密。

When he died, my mother tried to bring me closer.

他去世后，我母亲试图拉近我的距离。

But I really didn't want to grow closer.

但我真的不想再靠近。

I wanted my father.

我想要我的父亲。

And she was trying to tell me, she told me all the right things.

她试图告诉我，她告诉了我所有正确的事情。

But in my own little world, I thought it was wrong.

但在我自己的小世界里，我认为这是错误的。

Terence started doing badly in school, didn't listen to anybody, got it all sorts of trouble, and finally was arrested at the age of 14 for murder.

特伦斯开始在学校表现不佳，不听任何人的意见，惹上各种各样的麻烦，最后在 14 岁时因谋杀罪被捕。

A gang shooting with three other guys.

一个团伙与另外三个人一起枪击事件。

And once he was behind bars, he started to think about things, and calm down.

入狱后，他开始思考事情，冷静下来。

And he seemed to change.

而他似乎也变了。

He befriended some adults, wrote and acted in some plays with the theater group, plays in which he and other teenagers contemplated the consequences of their crimes.

他与一些成年人成为了朋友，并与剧团一起创作和表演了一些戏剧，在这些戏剧中，他和其他青少年思考了他们犯罪的后果。

He stayed at the Audi Home for two years as his case worked its way through the courts.

随着案件在法庭上审理，他在奥迪之家住了两年。

Finally, a verdict came down.

最终，判决下来了。

He was found guilty of murder.

他被判犯有谋杀罪。

But he made enough of an impression on the adults in the lockup that several who rarely testify on behalf of any kids chose to testify for Terence at a sentencing hearing, hoping to convince the judge that he was worth taking a chance on.

但他给看守所里的成年人留下了足够的印象，一些很少为孩子作证的人选择在量刑听证会上为特伦斯作证，希望让法官相信他值得一试。

One of these adults was Meade Palidofsky, of the theater group Music Theater Workshop, who'd spent months working closely with Terence.

其中一位成年人是音乐戏剧工作室剧团的米德·帕利多夫斯基（Meade Palidofsky），他花了几个月的时间与特伦斯密切合作。

Over ten years, out of hundreds of kids she's worked with behind bars, she's only testified for four or five.

十年来，她在监狱里与数百名孩子一起工作，但她只为四五个孩子出庭作证。

She says Terence was a natural leader, worked hard, had a sense of humor, got along with everybody.

她说特伦斯是一位天生的领导者，工作努力，有幽默感，与每个人都相处融洽。

Terence grieved in a way that I don't often see kids.

特伦斯的悲伤程度是我在孩子们身上很少见到的。

And my criteria, basically, is whether I think the kid has something to offer, whether they have remorse, whether if they went back out into the world-- I mean, the basic question I ask myself is, would I invite this child to stay at my house?

我的标准基本上是，我是否认为这个孩子有什么可提供的，他们是否有悔恨，是否他们回到外面的世界——我的意思是，我问自己的基本问题是，我会邀请这个孩子住在我家吗？

Would I bring them into my house, would I offer them a job, would I help them out?

我会带他们来我家吗？我会为他们提供工作吗？我会帮助他们吗？

And if the answer is yes, then I'll go to court.

如果答案是肯定的，那么我就会上法庭。

Because there are some kids that I really like who I wouldn't.

因为有些孩子我真的很喜欢，但我并不喜欢。

Because I think that although I like very much, if they went out on the street, they'd be right back into it.

因为我觉得虽然我很喜欢，但如果他们出去街上，他们很快就会回到街上。

But for Terence, there was a lot of us that really believed in him.

但对于特伦斯来说，我们很多人都真正相信他。

Terence also asked Willie Ross to testify on his behalf.

特伦斯还要求威利·罗斯代表他作证。

Mr. Ross turned him down.

罗斯先生拒绝了他。

Liberals tend to think about cases like this one way, conservatives think about them another.

自由主义者倾向于以一种方式思考此类案件，而保守派则倾向于以另一种方式思考。

Willie Ross's thinking takes in both sides.

威利·罗斯的想法兼顾了双方。

He'll give you the liberal line.

他会给你自由派路线。

He'll tell you that the only difference between him and Terence is that sports programs, church programs, and other positive community activities were there for Mr. Ross.

他会告诉你，他和特伦斯之间的唯一区别是罗斯先生有体育项目、教堂项目和其他积极的社区活动。

And that's what saved him.

这就是拯救他的原因。

That's what Terence never had.

这是特伦斯从未拥有过的。

And he'll give you the conservative line.

他会给你保守路线。

That any 14 year old or 12 year old who shoots somebody knows exactly what he's doing, and should serve an adult punishment.

任何开枪射击他人的 14 岁或 12 岁青少年都清楚自己在做什么，应该受到成人的惩罚。

Which, in Mr. Ross's point of view, should be the death penalty.

在罗斯先生看来，这应该是死刑。

And this kid, and everybody, Mr. Ross, and he asked me to go to court.

这个孩子，还有每个人，罗斯先生，他要求我去法庭。

I would not go to court with him.

我不会和他一起上法庭。

I do not go to court for a murder.

我不会因谋杀而上法庭。

Period.

时期。

For some things, you know, but not violent crime.

你知道，有些事情，但不是暴力犯罪。

I found him, and he found me too late.

我找到了他，他却发现我太晚了。

It's sad, but it happened.

很伤心，但它发生了。

One of the things I tell the kids, I believe in the death penalty.

我告诉孩子们的一件事是，我相信死刑。

Even for a 12, 13, 14 year old kid who shoots somebody?

即使是一个 12、13、14 岁的孩子开枪射击？

Yes.

是的。

I believe that.

我相信这一点。

Because I was 12, 13, and I knew better.

因为我当时12岁、13岁，我知道得更清楚。

I had a rifle at nine years old.

我九岁时就有了一支步枪。

And yet, still, I had more judgement than pull the trigger, and with all the anger I had.

然而，尽管如此，我仍然有更多的判断力，而不是扣动扳机，并且带着我所有的愤怒。

For years now, states have been cracking down on juvenile crime, sentencing teenagers and even preteens as adults in some places.

多年来，各州一直在打击青少年犯罪，在一些地方将青少年甚至青春期前的青少年当作成年人判刑。

We expect young people who face adversity now to master their emotions and overcome it.

我们期望现在面临逆境的年轻人能够控制自己的情绪并克服它。

Terence was tried as an adult, and sentenced as an adult to 40 years.

特伦斯作为成年人接受审判，并被作为成年人判处 40 年徒刑。

One year ago this week, at the age of 17, he entered a maximum security prison in Joliet, Illinois.

一年前的这个星期，17 岁的他进入伊利诺伊州乔利埃特一所戒备森严的监狱。

It's not like the Audi Home, where there are counselors and classes and activities, and acknowledgement that these are kids that might be rehabilitatable.

这不像奥迪之家，那里有辅导员、课程和活动，并承认这些孩子可能是可以康复的。

Oh, it's a lot different.

哦，有很大不同。

The officers, they different.

官员们，他们不同。

How are they different?

它们有何不同？

Terence Golden They more aggressive.

特伦斯·戈尔登他们更具侵略性。

A lot of them ain't out to help you.

他们中的很多人都不会来帮助你。

You might catch a few that's out to help you.

您可能会发现一些对您有帮助的内容。

But there ain't too many out there for you.

但那里没有太多适合你的。

The inmate's different.

犯人就不一样了

See there, it's more laid back.

看那儿，比较悠闲。

See, here, you got to watch, you know?

看，这里，你必须看，知道吗？

Watch continuously what's around you.

持续观察周围的事物。

It's all in the mind.

一切都在心里。

It's a mind game.

这是一场智力游戏。

I can make myself feel safe.

我可以让自己感到安全。

I don't talk to nobody, really.

我不跟任何人说话，真的。

I stay to myself, so I feel safe.

我独自一人，所以我感到安全。

He's been going to church in prison.

他在监狱里一直去教堂。

He says it's hard to stay on the straight and narrow.

他说，要保持正直和狭窄是很困难的。

If he doesn't get into trouble, he'll serve 20 years of his 40 year sentence.

如果他没有惹上麻烦，他将在 40 年刑期中服刑 20 年。

Our program was produced today by Blue Chevigny and myself, with Alex Blumberg, Susan Burton, Julie Snyder, and Starlee Kine.

今天我们的节目由 Blue Chevigny 和我本人以及 Alex Blumberg、Susan Burton、Julie Snyder 和 Starlee Kine 制作。

Contributing editors Paul Tough, Jack Hitt, Margie Rochlin, Alix Spiegel, Nancy Updike, and consigliere Sarah Vowell.

特约编辑 Paul Tough、Jack Hitt、Margie Rochlin、Alix Spiegel、Nancy Updike 和顾问 Sarah Vowell。

Production help from Todd Bachmann.

托德·巴赫曼 (Todd Bachmann) 提供制作帮助。

[ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS] To buy a cassette of this or any of our programs, call us here at WBEZ in Chicago.

[致谢] 要购买本节目或我们任何节目的磁带，请致电我们芝加哥的 WBEZ。

312-832-3380.

312-832-3380。

Or you know, you can listen to most of our programs for free on the internet, at our website at www.thislife.org where we include all sorts of stuff we can't fit on the radio show.

或者您知道，您可以在互联网上免费收听我们的大部分节目，在我们的网站 www.thislife.org 上，我们包含了广播节目中无法容纳的各种内容。

Thanks to Elizabeth Meister who runs the site.

感谢运营该网站的伊丽莎白·梅斯特 (Elizabeth Meister)。

This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.

《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。

Funding for our program is provided by Amazon.com.

我们的计划的资金由 Amazon.com 提供。

The books and music on This American Life are available on Amazon.com.

《This American Life》的书籍和音乐可在 Amazon.com 上找到。

[FUNDING CREDITS]

[资金来源]

WBEZ management oversight by Torey Malatia, who just popped in, just popped his head in the door with this question,

托里·马拉蒂亚 (Torey Malatia) 负责 WBEZ 的管理监督，他刚刚突然出现，将头探进门提出了这个问题，

"What the hell do you think you're doing, booby?"

“你到底想做什么，布比？”

I'm Ira Glass, back next week, with more stories of This American Life .

我是艾拉·格拉斯，下周回来，带来更多《美国生活》的故事。

"Did anyone tell you we're dealing with human lives here?"

“有人告诉过你我们这里处理的是人命吗？”

This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.

《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。