118: What You Lookin’ At? - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #118 | December 30, 2005 118: What You Lookin’ At?
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 118 集 | 2005 年 12 月 30 日 118：你在看什么？
Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
注：《美国生活》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.
如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue Ira Glass Aphrodite, the goddess of love, is looking down on earth one day.
序言 艾拉·格拉斯 爱神阿佛洛狄忒有一天俯视着大地。
Spots a mortal woman named Psyche, who is so beautiful Aphrodite is jealous.
发现一位名叫普赛克（Psyche）的凡间女子，她如此美丽，阿芙罗狄蒂嫉妒不已。
Sends her son Cupid down to earth to destroy her.
派她的儿子丘比特下凡毁灭她。
Cupid sees Psyche.
丘比特看到普赛克。
Naturally falls in love with the woman his mother hates most in the world.
自然而然地爱上了这个世界上他母亲最讨厌的女人。
Only surprise about that part of the story is they're not all Jews.
故事的这一部分唯一令人惊讶的是他们并不都是犹太人。
[LAUGHTER} Cupid marries Psyche.
[笑声] 丘比特与普赛克结婚。
But he doesn't want Psyche to know that he's a god.
但他不想让普赛克知道他是神。
He thinks it'll ruin things.
他认为这会毁掉一切。
She won't love him for who he is in his heart.
她不会因为他心里的那个人而爱他。
She'll just love him because he's famous and powerful.
她会爱他，因为他出名且有权势。
So he makes her promise to never look at him.
所以他让她保证永远不会看他。
They have this passionate love that takes place entirely in the dark.
他们的爱情是在黑暗中进行的。
But her girlfriends talk to her behind his back.
但她的女朋友却在背后议论她。
They tell her that if he never wants her to see him, it must be because he has something to hide, must be a monster.
他们告诉她，如果他不想让她看到他，那一定是因为他有什么事情要隐瞒，一定是个怪物。
So she comes to him at night while he's sleeping, with a lit candelabra.
因此，她会在晚上他熟睡时拿着点燃的烛台来找他。
And she sees him there.
她在那里看到了他。
He's naked.
他赤身裸体。
He's perfect.
他很完美。
He has wings.
他有翅膀。
He's beautiful.
他很漂亮。
And she's just about to go when some wax from one of the candles falls on him, and he wakes with a start.
她正要走，一支蜡烛的蜡落在他身上，他惊醒了。
And their eyes meet.
他们的目光相遇了。
He sees that she's betrayed him.
他看出她背叛了他。
She broke her promise.
她违背了自己的诺言。
She doubted his love.
她怀疑他的爱。
She wanted to see.
她想看看。
And the gods punish her.
众神也惩罚了她。
This, I say to you as somebody who works in a medium, radio, where you never see anything-- this is what seeing is all about.
作为一个在广播媒介中工作的人，我对你说，在那里你永远看不到任何东西——这就是观看的意义所在。
Right there.
就在那里。
We do not listen to our hearts.
我们不听从自己的内心。
We doubt, and then we want to look.
我们怀疑，然后我们想看看。
And seeing is about something else.
而观看则是另一回事。
It's about power.
这是关于权力的。
I checked with an actual humanities professor, and this is what he told me.
我咨询了一位真正的人文学科教授，这就是他告诉我的。
Richard Klein teaches at Cornell.
理查德·克莱因在康奈尔大学任教。
The power of the look to dominate and even destroy is a very old story in human history, and may have biological origins.
外观的主宰甚至毁灭的力量是人类历史上一个非常古老的故事，并且可能有生物学起源。
When a dog, for example, looks directly in the eye of another animal or human, as if to stare it down, that's a certain sign of hostile feelings, a sort of challenge, a prelude to aggression.
例如，当一只狗直视另一只动物或人类的眼睛，仿佛要凝视它时，这是敌对情绪的某种迹象，一种挑战，是攻击性的前奏。
It's an ancient rule, he says.
他说，这是一条古老的规则。
It's why slaves don't look in the eyes of their masters.
这就是为什么奴隶不看主人的眼睛。
It's why you don't meet the eyes of a king while you bow in his presence.
这就是为什么当你在国王面前鞠躬时，你不会直视他的眼睛。
It's why parts of British royalty, even today, prefer not to be seen in public, not to be photographed, even after Princess Diana became the most photographed woman in the world.
这就是为什么即使在今天，即使戴安娜王妃成为世界上被拍照次数最多的女性，部分英国皇室成员仍然不愿意在公共场合露面，不愿被拍照。
And I mean, the monarchy itself, Queen Elizabeth in particular, has long sort of felt that it was, on the contrary, more sort of appropriate to the monarchy, and perhaps even necessary to its survival, that it appear less in public.
我的意思是，君主制本身，尤其是伊丽莎白女王，长期以来一直认为，相反，在公共场合较少出现更适合君主制，甚至可能对其生存是必要的。
I think that's one of the reasons why they were so alarmed by Diana.
我认为这就是他们对戴安娜王妃如此震惊的原因之一。
I mean, de Gaulle, in France, believed powerfully that leaders should be little seen and rarely heard, that the power sort of comes from the invisibility.
我的意思是，法国的戴高乐坚信，领导人应该很少被看到，也很少被听到，权力来自于隐形。
I've been thinking a lot lately about why somebody would pay $30 to come to a theater and see a show that you can get for free on the radio.
最近我一直在思考为什么有人愿意花 30 美元去剧院观看可以在广播中免费收听的节目。
And I think that this is the very reason.
我认为这就是原因。
Right here, on the radio, invisible, we are just too powerful.
就在这里，在广播中，看不见，我们太强大了。
Seeing us, seeing anybody that you hear on the radio, it makes them human-size-- which seems like a healthy thing, actually.
看到我们，看到你在广播中听到的任何人，都会让他们变得像人一样——实际上，这似乎是一件健康的事情。
Well, from WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life.
嗯，来自芝加哥 WBEZ 和国际公共广播电台，这就是《美国生活》。
I'm Ira Glass, today bringing you a co-production with WNYC in New York, a live show from Town Hall in New York City.
我是 Ira Glass，今天为您带来与纽约 WNYC 联合制作的纽约市政厅现场表演。
Today on our program, as hundreds of people watch us do this show, our theme is What Are You Lookin' At?
今天在我们的节目中，数百人观看我们的节目，我们的主题是你在看什么？
Stories of what it means to be seen and to see.
关于被看见和被看见意味着什么的故事。
Act One, American Goth, the story of one woman's ongoing quest to look meaner.
第一幕《美国哥特》讲述了一名女性不断追求卑鄙的故事。
Act Two, Lifesavers, the story of a teenage girl who would hit you if you looked at her the wrong way, and what happened when suddenly hundreds of people were looking at her, all at once.
第二幕《救生员》讲述了一个十几岁女孩的故事，如果你用错误的方式看她，她就会打你，以及当突然有数百人同时看着她时发生了什么。
Act Three, Climb Every Mountain.
第三幕，攀登每一座山。
Die-hard New Yorker David Rakoff heads off to a land of incomprehensible people who, he worries, are always noticing how different he is, a land called New Hampshire.
顽固的纽约人大卫·拉科夫 (David Rakoff) 前往一片充满难以理解的人们的土地，他担心这些人总是注意到他有多么与众不同，这片土地叫做新罕布什尔州。
Onstage also here at Town Hall, They Might Be Giants and the This American Life Orchestra.
在市政厅的舞台上还有“他们可能是巨人”和“This American Life Orchestra”。
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
Act One, American Goth.
第一幕，美国哥特。
There are the people who take hours to get dressed, who dress primarily to be seen, and then there are the rest of us.
有些人要花几个小时才能穿好衣服，他们穿衣服主要是为了引人注目，然后是我们其他人。
Sometimes someone tries to make the jump from that second group into the first group.
有时有人试图从第二组跳到第一组。
Please welcome writer Sarah Vowell.
欢迎作家莎拉·沃威尔。
I'm sitting at my desk quietly minding my own, as they say in the rap songs, when my torturer darkens the doorway.
正如说唱歌曲中所说，我正坐在办公桌前静静地思考自己的事情，这时我的折磨者让门口变暗了。
She drags me into a cramped bathroom, shoves my head under a faucet, shines a blinding light in my eyes, cinches my neck in plastic sheeting, and comes at me with scissors.
她把我拖进一间狭窄的浴室，把我的头塞到水龙头下，用刺眼的灯光照射我的眼睛，用塑料布勒住我的脖子，然后用剪刀冲向我。
She douses me with chemicals and makes me sit there, dehydrating under the plastic, while the acid stings my flesh.
她给我浇上化学物质，让我坐在那里，在塑料下脱水，而酸刺痛我的肉。
And so when I look up from my desk and see her standing there with the scissors, I shudder.
因此，当我从办公桌上抬起头，看到她拿着剪刀站在那里时，我不寒而栗。
"Hi, Mom," I say.
“嗨，妈妈，”我说。
"Guess you think I need a haircut."
“我猜你认为我需要理发。”
My mother had been a hairdresser before my twin sister Amy and I were born.
在我和双胞胎妹妹艾米出生之前，我的母亲曾是一名美发师。
More precisely, she was a hairdresser in Oklahoma in the 1960s-- the beehive's golden age.
更准确地说，20 世纪 60 年代正是蜂巢的黄金时代，她是俄克拉荷马州的一名理发师。
Since she gave up her career to take care of us, all that energy that used to go into whipping hundreds of heads into an architectural frenzy was focused on the two of us.
自从她放弃自己的职业生涯来照顾我们后，所有过去用来激励数百人投入建筑狂热的精力都集中在我们两个人身上。
And since we were as bald as pharaohs, she killed time while our hair was growing in by Scotch-taping bows to our newborn noggins.
由于我们都像法老一样秃顶，她就在我们的头发长出来的时候用透明胶带把我们新生的脑袋打成蝴蝶结来消磨时间。
Her ardor for our appearance increased as we got older, and her attentions never stopped at the neck.
随着我们年龄的增长，她对我们外表的热情也越来越高，她的注意力从来没有停留在脖子上。
There were clothes.
有衣服。
There were shoes.
有鞋子。
Accessories.
配件。
Amy liked to think about such things, shop for such things.
艾米喜欢思考这样的事情，购买这样的东西。
Unlike me, my sister did not threaten to call Amnesty International every time Mom wanted to give her a home perm.
与我不同的是，每次妈妈想要给我姐姐在家烫发时，她并没有威胁要打电话给国际特赦组织。
I was a bit of an embarrassment to my mother-- all scuffed shoes and stringy hair and lint.
我让我的母亲有点尴尬——鞋子磨损了，头发又粘又乱。
Once, when Amy and I were 14, the three of us were getting out of the car after a trip to the mall.
有一次，艾米和我 14 岁的时候，我们三个人逛完商场后下车。
The neighbor woman, who was out watering her yard, saw the shopping bags and asked what we'd bought.
邻居妇女当时正在院子里浇水，看到了购物袋，就问我们买了什么。
Amy showed off her new candy-colored sweater and her hoop earrings and hot pink pants.
艾米展示了她的新糖果色毛衣、环形耳环和亮粉色裤子。
The woman congratulated Amy.
这位女士向艾米表示祝贺。
She then turned to me, pointing at the rectangular bulge protruding from the small brown bag in my hand.
然后她转向我，指着我手里的棕色小袋子上突出的矩形凸起。
I reluctantly pulled out my single purchase-- a hardback of The Grapes of Wrath.
我不情愿地拿出我唯一购买的东西——一本《愤怒的葡萄》精装本。
My mother looked at the neighbor, rolled her eyes in my direction, and stage-whispered, "We're going through a book phase."
我母亲看着邻居，朝我的方向翻了个白眼，然后小声说道：“我们正在经历读书阶段。”
And it's such a hopeful, almost utopian word, that word "phase." And now that we are finishing up the third decade of the book phase, we ask ourselves if we have changed.
“阶段”这个词是如此充满希望，几乎是乌托邦。现在我们已经完成了本书阶段的第三个十年，我们问自己是否已经改变了。
Sure, we still dress in the bruise palette of gray, black, and blue, and we still haven't gotten around to piercing our ears.
当然，我们仍然穿着灰色、黑色和蓝色的衣服，我们仍然没有时间去打耳洞。
But we wear lipstick now.
但现在我们都涂口红了。
We own high-heeled shoes.
我们有高跟鞋。
Concessions have been made.
已经做出了让步。
Still, I have been called a curmudgeon by Bitch magazine.
尽管如此，《Bitch》杂志仍然称我为脾气暴躁的人。
And that's the image I'm cultivating.
这就是我正在培养的形象。
But truth be told, I'm not as dour-looking as I would like.
但说实话，我并没有我想象的那么阴沉。
I'm stuck with this round, sweetie-pie face, tiny, heart-shaped lips, the daintiest dimples, and apple cheeks so rosy I exist in a perpetual blush.
我被这张圆圆的甜饼脸、小小的心形嘴唇、最精致的酒窝和红润的苹果脸颊所吸引，让我永远处于脸红之中。
At five foot four, I barely squeak by average height.
我身高五英尺四英寸，按照平均身高来说几乎算不上什么。
And then there's my voice-- straight out of second grade.
然后是我的声音——直接来自二年级。
I come across so young and innocent and harmless that I have been carded for buying maple syrup.
我遇到的人是如此年轻、天真、无害，以至于我因为购买枫糖浆而被卡住了。
Tourists feel more than safe approaching me for directions.
游客们向我询问方向非常安全。
Telemarketers always ask if my mother is home.
电话推销员总是问我妈妈是否在家。
And waitresses always, always call me "hon."
女服务员总是、总是叫我“亲爱的”。
So the last time I got my hair cut, I asked my hairdresser if he could make me look more menacing.
所以上次我剪头发的时候，我问理发师是否可以让我看起来更有威胁性。
I said I admired Marilyn Manson's new hairdo, and could he make me look like that?
我说我很欣赏玛丽莲·曼森的新发型，他能让我看起来像那样吗？
And even though my hairdresser is German and everything, when he was done with me, I have never in my life looked so sickeningly nice.
尽管我的理发师是德国人，但当他给我理完发后，我这辈子从来没有看起来如此漂亮过。
Is it too much to ask to make strangers nervous, to look shady and untrustworthy and malcontent?
让陌生人感到紧张、显得阴暗、不值得信任和不满的要求是否太过分了？
Something needed to be done.
需要做点什么。
I happened to hear about a group of goths in San Francisco who offered goth makeovers to civilians and then take them to a goth club to see if they can pass.
我偶然听说旧金山有一群哥特人给平民提供哥特改造，然后带他们去哥特俱乐部，看看能不能通过。
Goths, for those unfamiliar with this particular subculture, are the pale-faced, black-clad vampiric types with forlorn stares framed by raccoon eye makeup.
对于那些不熟悉这种特殊亚文化的人来说，哥特人是指脸色苍白、身穿黑衣、有着浣熊眼妆、眼神凄凉的吸血鬼类型。
The name derives, of course, from gothic, a style, according to my dictionary, emphasizing the grotesque, mysterious, and desolate.
当然，这个名字源自哥特式，根据我的字典，这是一种风格，强调怪诞、神秘和荒凉。
So I called Mary Mitchell, aka Mary Queen of Hurts, and asked for a private lesson in goth.
所以我给玛丽·米切尔（又名“伤害玛丽女王”）打电话，要求上一节哥特式私人课程。
She just told me to come to San Francisco and pack some black clothes, and she and her team of expert goths would handle the rest.
她只是告诉我去旧金山带一些黑色衣服，她和她的哥特专家团队会处理剩下的事情。
Coming up with black apparel for the occasion wasn't particularly problematic for me.
为这个场合设计黑色服装对我来说并不是特别困难。
One might describe my closet as Johnny Cash once described his-- "It's dark in there."
人们可能会像约翰尼·卡什曾经描述他的那样来描述我的衣柜——“里面很黑。”
And I've always admired the goths.
我一直很欣赏哥特人。
There's something brave about them, something romantic and feminine and free, not to mention refreshingly honest.
她们身上有一些勇敢的东西，一些浪漫的、女性化的和自由的东西，更不用说令人耳目一新的诚实了。
If the funny T-shirt slogans and crisp khaki pants of the average American tell the lie that everything's going to be OK, the black lace garbs and ghoulish capes of goth tell the truth-- that you suffer, then you die.
如果说普通美国人滑稽的 T 恤标语和挺括的卡其裤是在撒谎，说一切都会好起来，那么黑色蕾丝服装和残忍的哥特斗篷则说的是事实——你受苦了，然后你就死了。
The goths literally wear their hearts on their tattered sleeves, frankly daring the world to stare at their inner ugliness, and stare hard.
哥特人确实把自己的心暴露在破烂的袖子上，坦率地敢于让世界直视他们内心的丑陋，并且狠狠地盯着。
I reported to a Market Street address where I met the five members of my death-warmed-over beauty squad.
我到市场街的一个地址报到，在那里我见到了我的选美队的五名成员。
I met Indra, a gorgeous blonde in a long velvet skirt; Terrance, dashing in a velvet smoking jacket; the tall, dark Monique; Elizabeth, in strappy black leather; and, of course Mary, whose seven-inch patent leather heels would relegate her later on to dancing only to the slowest songs for fear of tipping over.
我遇到了因陀罗（Indra），一位身穿天鹅绒长裙的美丽金发女郎。穿着天鹅绒吸烟装的特伦斯 (Terrance) 风度翩翩；身材高大、肤色黝黑的莫妮克；伊丽莎白，黑色系带皮革；当然，还有玛丽，她的七英寸漆皮高跟鞋让她后来只能随着最慢的歌曲跳舞，以免摔倒。
Prior to meeting Mary Queen of Hurts, I found her sadistic nickname entirely appropriate, as she assigned me goth homework to do before my arrival.
在见到伤害玛丽女王之前，我发现她的虐待狂绰号完全合适，因为她在我到达之前给我布置了哥特作业。
The assignment consisted of going through a punchy little primer she wrote with Indra and Terrance which outlines the seven steps to "gothitude." Step number six asked me to go through my records and pull out the darkest, saddest song, and play it over and over again.
这项作业包括阅读她与因陀罗和特伦斯一起写的一本有力的小入门书，其中概述了“哥德式”的七个步骤。第六步要求我翻阅我的唱片，找出最黑暗、最悲伤的歌曲，然后一遍又一遍地播放。
Though the darkest, saddest stuff in my collection is all old country music.
虽然我收藏中最黑暗、最悲伤的东西都是古老的乡村音乐。
So my goth soundtrack is Roy Acuff's godless drunk-driving car-crash number, "Wreck on the Highway." Hit it, boys!
所以我的哥特配乐是罗伊·阿卡夫（Roy Acuff）的无神论醉酒驾驶车祸歌曲“高速公路上的残骸”。打吧，孩子们！
[MUSIC - "WRECK ON THE HIGHWAY"]
[音乐-“高速公路上的残骸”]
The whiskey and blood ran together mixed in the glass where they lay.
威士忌和血在他们躺着的玻璃杯中混合在一起。
Death played her hand in destruction but I didn't hear nobody pray.
死亡毁灭了她，但我没有听到有人祈祷。
Before anyone breaks out the eyeliner, we all sit in a circle and go through my homework.
在有人画眼线之前，我们都围坐成一圈，完成我的作业。
The whole thing reminds me of graduate school seminars, except these people are smart and funny and have something interesting to say.
整件事让我想起了研究生院的研讨会，只不过这些人很聪明、很有趣，而且有一些有趣的话要说。
They outline and debate the finer points of goth theory.
他们概述并辩论了哥特理论的精髓。
They all turned goth in their early teens, and they are, as Indra puts it, "So in our thirties."
他们都在十几岁的时候就变成了哥特人，正如因陀罗所说，“所以我们三十多岁了。”
Step one of the guidelines is choosing a goth name.
指南的第一步是选择一个哥特名字。
Indra says, "Most of us have changed our name to be something more gothic.
因陀罗说：“我们大多数人都把自己的名字改成了更哥特式的名字。
A lot of people legally change their name." According to Mary, "If you go into any of the goth clubs nowadays, you'll find a lot of spooky names, like Raven and Rat and Sage."
很多人合法地更改了自己的名字。”据玛丽说，“如果你现在走进任何一个哥特俱乐部，你都会发现很多令人毛骨悚然的名字，比如乌鸦、老鼠和圣人。”
When I was pondering a good goth name for myself, I paged through my reference books on death and dying, looking for something gruesome.
当我为自己考虑一个好的哥特名字时，我翻阅了有关死亡和垂死的参考书，寻找一些可怕的东西。
But nothing felt right.
但感觉一切都不对劲。
Maybe it's because I came of age in the '80s and I've seen Blue Velvet too many times, but to me, the really frightening stuff has nothing to do with ravens and rats.
也许是因为我已经是八十年代的成年人了，《蓝丝绒》我看过太多次了，但对我来说，真正可怕的东西与乌鸦和老鼠无关。
The truly sordid has a sunny, WASP-y glow.
真正肮脏的事物有着阳光明媚、WASP 式的光芒。
Therefore, I tell them, the most perverse name I can think of is "Becky."
因此，我告诉他们，我能想到的最反常的名字是“贝基”。
[LAUGHTER] It turns out, that by saying the magic word "Becky," I have suddenly moved to the head of the class, goth-wise.
[笑声] 事实证明，通过说出“贝基”这个神奇的词，我突然成为了班上的佼佼者，哥特式的。
As Monique puts it, "You are understanding the pink of goth.
正如莫妮克所说，“你正在了解哥特的粉红色。
You've skipped a couple levels, and you went straight to pink." The group's consensus is that pink is the apex of expert goth, that newcomers and neophytes should stick with basic black, but those confident enough, complex enough, can exude gloom and doom while wearing the color of sugar and spice.
你跳过了几个级别，直接变成了粉红色。”该团体的共识是，粉色是专家哥特的顶峰，新人和新手应该坚持基本的黑色，但那些足够自信、足够复杂的人，可以在穿着糖和香料的颜色时散发出阴郁和厄运。
Indra argues that pink can be an intelligent, sarcastic color, though Terrance says of experimenting with pink, "Proceed with caution.
因德拉认为粉色可以是一种聪明、讽刺的颜色，尽管特伦斯在尝试粉色时说：“谨慎行事。
I can't warn you enough."
我对你的警告还不够。”
As if they need to warn me.
好像他们需要警告我一样。
It would never occur to me to wear pink, just as it would never occur to Michael Douglas to play a poor person.
我永远不会想到穿粉色衣服，就像迈克尔·道格拉斯永远不会想到扮演穷人一样。
[LAUGHTER] These, I realize, are my people.
[笑声]我意识到，这些都是我的人。
Simpatico.
辛帕蒂科。
I think that's why, at that moment, I'm willing and able to do something with them that I was never able to do with my mom-- namely, sit still while they poke and prod and paint me, without complaint.
我想这就是为什么，在那一刻，我愿意并且能够和他们一起做一些我从来没有和我妈妈一起做过的事情——也就是说，当他们戳我、戳我、画我时，我静静地坐着，毫无怨言。
I know I'm in the right hands when Terrance reassures me that "when we're done with you, no one will call you 'hon.'"
当特伦斯向我保证“当我们处理完你之后，没有人会叫你‘亲爱的’”时，我知道我的处境是对的。
It's an astonishingly slow process.
这是一个慢得惊人的过程。
Indra decides to make me up like the silent film star Louise Brooks, shading in concentric circles of eyeshadow and then liquid eyeliner, which takes a full five minutes to dry.
因陀罗决定给我化妆，像无声电影明星路易丝·布鲁克斯一样，先用同心圆画出眼影，然后用眼线液描画，需要整整五分钟才能干。
She agonizes over lipstick, applies a birthmark in the shape of a snake on my cheek.
她为口红苦苦思索，在我脸颊上画了一个蛇形的胎记。
Then they dress me.
然后他们给我穿衣服。
By the time they're done cinching up the corset and stabilizing my bustle, I'm in so many layers of black lace scarves and fringe and fishnet stockings that I could play strip poker for three weeks straight without baring my belly button.
当他们收紧紧身胸衣并稳定我的喧闹时，我已经穿上了多层黑色蕾丝围巾、流苏和渔网袜，我可以连续三周玩脱衣扑克而不会露出肚脐。
The finishing touches are applied in a full-on pit stop.
最后的润色是在全面的进站中进行的。
I sit in a chair and Monique curls my hair while Terrance fusses with my lipstick and Mary paints my nails black, all at once.
我坐在椅子上，莫妮克给我卷头发，特伦斯忙着涂口红，玛丽把我的指甲涂成黑色，这一切都在同一时间进行。
I find I enjoy this loving, methodical attention.
我发现我喜欢这种充满爱意、有条不紊的关注。
I'm so pleased with the results that I keep looking in the mirror and smiling.
我对结果非常满意，一直看着镜子并微笑。
I smile so much that Elizabeth reminds me that technically, a good goth is supposed to pout.
我笑得很开心，伊丽莎白提醒我，从技术上讲，一个好的哥特应该撅嘴。
But I'm too giddy.
但我太浮躁了。
Something occurs to me.
我突然想到一些事情。
What if all those years, my mom wanted to do just this-- sit me down and fiddle with my hair, not because she wanted to torture me, or because she was embarrassed about how I looked, or because she missed her job.
如果这些年来，我妈妈只想做这件事——让我坐下来摆弄我的头发，不是因为她想折磨我，或者因为她对我的外表感到尴尬，或者因为她错过了工作，那该怎么办？
What if she wanted to do this for me to show me that she loves me?
如果她想为我这样做以表明她爱我怎么办？
If all along, she was trying to give me the feeling I'm getting from these strangers?
如果一直以来，她都在试图给我一种从这些陌生人那里得到的感觉？
I thought she was the oppressor and I was the victim.
我以为她是压迫者，而我是受害者。
But it's just as true the other way around.
但反之亦然。
It was time to go to the club.
是时候去俱乐部了。
But after two hours of primping, I was tired.
但经过两个小时的打扮，我累了。
I ask them if they ever spend so much time doing their hair and makeup that they're too pooped to go out.
我问他们是否曾花太多时间做头发和化妆，以致于都懒得出门了。
They said that for this very reason, there is a goth rule.
他们说，正是因为这个原因，才有了哥特规则。
You have to stay at the club at least as long as it takes to get dressed up.
你必须至少在俱乐部里呆到穿好衣服为止。
The club we go to is called Roderick's Chamber, cheerfully named for a character in Edgar Allan Poe's "Fall of the House of Usher." Everywhere blackness, leather, lace, frowns.
我们去的俱乐部叫“罗德里克室”，以埃德加·爱伦·坡的《厄舍屋的倒塌》中的一个角色命名。到处都是黑色、皮革、蕾丝、皱眉。
And music.
还有音乐。
But while regular dance club music clips by at the pace "wah wah wah wah-wah wah-wah wah wah," the goth club music is sluggish, slowed down.
但是，虽然常规舞蹈俱乐部的音乐以“哇哇哇哇哇哇哇哇”的节奏响起，但哥特俱乐部的音乐却缓慢而缓慢。
"Wah-- wah-- wah-- wah wah wah wah-- wah wah."
“哇——哇——哇——哇哇哇——哇哇。”
[MUSIC - GOTHY CLUB TUNE] The thing I love most about the goth club is how passive it is.
[音乐 - GOTHY CLUB TUNE] 我最喜欢哥特俱乐部的一点是它是多么的被动。
Hardly anyone talks to anyone else.
几乎没有人与其他人交谈。
It is free of the normal social pressures to smile, and interact, and appear content.
它摆脱了微笑、互动和表现得满足的正常社会压力。
There's none of that "getting to know you" pick-up crap.
没有任何“了解你”的废话。
In fact, the mood is antithetical to pick-ups.
事实上，这种情绪与提振是相反的。
It's more like, stay away.
更像是，远离。
No one cares if you dance.
没有人关心你是否跳舞。
No one cares if you don't.
如果你不这样做，没有人在乎。
As someone who often dreads strangers, the anti-social nature of this social situation makes me feel communal and part of something, one of us.
作为一个经常害怕陌生人的人，这种社交情境的反社会性质让我感觉自己是集体的，是某种事物的一部分，是我们中的一员。
Like, "hey, I hate talking to you, too!" It is completely liberating.
就像，“嘿，我也讨厌和你说话！”这是完全的解放。
The whole point of going there is to stare and be stared at.
去那里的全部目的就是凝视并被凝视。
Someone walking in off the street might think, what's the fun in that?
走在街上的人可能会想，这有什么乐趣呢？
And the answer is, all the interaction, all the fun, all the real moments happen at home when you're getting dressed, talking to your friends about how you'll look.
答案是，所有的互动、所有的乐趣、所有真实的时刻都发生在家里，当你穿好衣服，和你的朋友谈论你的外表时。
The club is about being seen, which is so inferior.
俱乐部是为了被人看到，这是多么低劣的事情。
After the mandatory two hours, I hug my goths goodbye and hail a cab.
在强制性的两个小时之后，我与我的哥特人告别并叫了一辆出租车。
Usually I am a cab driver's dream-- polite, small, nonthreatening.
通常我是出租车司机的梦想——有礼貌、身材矮小、不具威胁性。
Perhaps that is why cab drivers always talk to me.
也许这就是出租车司机总是和我说话的原因。
But tonight, I am Becky.
但今晚，我是贝基。
I am goth.
我是哥特人。
Not a word from the driver.
司机一句话也没有说。
Bless him, he keeps staring at me and my eye makeup in the rear-view mirror, watching his back.
祝福他，他一直在后视镜里盯着我和我的眼妆，看着他的背影。
She is menacing, he's thinking.
她在威胁，他想。
I can tell.
我可以告诉。
His fear pays off.
他的恐惧得到了回报。
I tip him extravagantly.
我给了他很大的小费。
So extravagantly that I blow my cover.
如此奢侈以至于我暴露了自己的身份。
He turns and gives me a look that says, "Thanks, hon."
他转过身来，看了我一眼，仿佛在说：“谢谢，亲爱的。”
Sarah Vowell.
莎拉·沃威尔。
[MUSIC - "SHOEHORN WITH TEETH" BY THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS]
[音乐 - 他们可能是巨人的“带牙齿的鞋拔”]
[APPLAUSE] Act Two: Lifesavers Ira Glass Act Two, Lifesavers.
[掌声] 第二幕：救生员 Ira Glass 第二幕，救生员。
Last month I was doing this project as a favor for a friend where I was interviewing a lot of kids in arts programs around the city of Chicago.
上个月，我为了帮朋友做这个项目，采访了芝加哥市周围艺术项目中的很多孩子。
And as part of that project, I met this 18-year-old girl named Lucia Lopez.
作为该项目的一部分，我遇到了这个 18 岁的女孩，名叫露西娅·洛佩兹 (Lucia Lopez)。
Back when she was 16, through a sort of fluke, Lucia joined a group called Music Theatre Workshop in Chicago.
16 岁时，露西亚出于某种侥幸加入了芝加哥一个名为“音乐戏剧工作室”的团体。
And it happened some kids basically just came through the neighborhood interviewing teenagers about their lives, and then those kids wrote a play about what they got, and invited Lucia to be in the play, to play herself.
碰巧有些孩子基本上只是从附近采访青少年的生活，然后这些孩子写了一部关于他们所得到的戏剧，并邀请露西娅参加戏剧，扮演自己。
And at first, when she joined the group, the other kids were scared of her.
起初，当她加入这个团体时，其他孩子都害怕她。
She was much tougher, much more street, in a gang.
在帮派中，她更加坚强，更加街头。
Most of her family was in the gang, which in Chicago is a kind of common formulation.
她的大部分家人都加入了帮派，这在芝加哥是一种常见的说法。
She herself had served time in juvie.
她本人也曾在少年监狱服刑。
Yeah, I went to people, like, what are you looking at?
是的，我去找人们，比如，你在看什么？
Do have a problem?
有问题吗？
Well, do I look like somebody or am I somebody?
那么，我看起来像某人还是我就是某人？
And then people would be like, no, I ain't looking at you.
然后人们会说，不，我没有看着你。
I was just wondering who you are.
我只是想知道你是谁。
And I'm like, well, keep on wondering because you know, whatever, but don't be looking at me like that.
我想，好吧，继续想知道，因为你知道，无论如何，但不要那样看着我。
Because, you know, something could kick off.
因为，你知道，有些事情可能会开始。
Since I grew up in my house with having violence.
因为我是在充满暴力的家里长大的。
Like when my stepfather is a very violent man.
就像我的继父是一个非常暴力的人一样。
So it was like one of those things that it was an instinct.
所以这就像其中之一，这是一种本能。
If anybody touched me, it was right there and then, we had to hit.
如果有人碰我，它就在那里，然后我们就必须打。
And plus, like--
另外，比如——
You had to hit?
你非得打吗？
Lucia Lopez Well, you know.
露西娅·洛佩兹 嗯，你知道的。
It was just like that.
就是这样。
If anybody even stared at me, it was like, what are you looking at?
如果有人盯着我看，我就会说，你在看什么？
Do you have a problem?
你有问题吗？
[?
[？
Because you know it would ?] start it off, so we could just kick it off right here and there.
因为你知道它会？]开始它，所以我们可以就地开始它。
Not long after she started with the theater group, she missed two rehearsals in a row, and the head of the group, Meade Palidofsky, replaced her in the show with another girl.
她加入剧团后不久，就连续错过了两次排练，剧团组长米德·帕利多夫斯基用另一个女孩代替了她的演出。
Rules are rules.
规则就是规则。
Then Lucia came back.
然后露西亚回来了。
What was especially galling to her was that this other girl, Ruchelle, was going to be onstage, reciting Lucia's life story, things that had happened to Lucia that were in the script.
尤其让她感到难堪的是，另一个女孩，鲁谢尔，要上台，讲述露西亚的人生故事，以及剧本中发生在露西亚身上的事情。
Meade and another girl in the group tell what happened when Lucia showed up again.
米德和小组中的另一个女孩讲述了露西亚再次出现时发生的事情。
Well, she was upset, but she was-- when she came back in and I told her that Ruchelle had taken her place, she was like, I'm going to go beat her up.
好吧，她很沮丧，但她是——当她回来时，我告诉她鲁谢尔取代了她的位置，她说，我要去打她。
I mean, I had to stop her.
我的意思是，我必须阻止她。
I said, no, if you're going to beat somebody up, you should beat me up, because I'm the one that gave her the part.
我说，不，如果你要打别人，你应该打我，因为我是给她这个角色的人。
And the rest of us were sent to an early lunch that day.
那天我们其他人都被送去吃早午餐。
Exactly.
确切地。
So I had to calm her down and say no, don't beat Ruchelle up, you know?
所以我必须让她冷静下来并对她说不，不要打鲁谢尔，知道吗？
It's all right.
没关系。
And we talked to her, and eventually we split the part up.
我们和她谈过，最终我们把这部分分开了。
We realized how much it meant to her, but then she also had to realize that if it meant that much, she needed to come to rehearsal.
我们意识到这对她来说意义重大，但随后她也必须意识到，如果这意义重大，她就需要来排练。
Back when she entered public school, like a lot of kids from her neighborhood, Lucia didn't speak English, didn't do well.
当她进入公立学校时，就像她附近的许多孩子一样，露西娅不会说英语，成绩也不好。
As she got older, she found herself getting mad at the other kids, fighting all the time.
随着年龄的增长，她发现自己对其他孩子很生气，总是打架。
And I can't get a decent sleep ever.
而且我永远无法睡个好觉。
I go to school with this image in my head, like, oh my god, I see my mom's head getting bashed in the walls.
我带着这样的画面去上学，就像，天啊，我看到我妈妈的头被撞到墙上了。
And it's just like, I think that's what turned me into a very violent kid.
就像，我想这就是让我变成一个非常暴力的孩子的原因。
Just, you know, the kids being happy was very tough for me.
只是，你知道，孩子们快乐对我来说非常困难。
Because I was like, why can't I have fun like that?
因为我想，为什么我不能像这样玩得开心呢？
Why can't I live like that?
为什么我就不能这样生活呢？
Why is it so difficult?
为什么这么难？
I was really bad.
我真的很糟糕。
I was very bad with teachers.
我对老师的态度很不好。
If a teacher were to even tell me, Lucia, be quiet!
如果老师告诉我的话，露西娅，安静点！
Whatever.
任何。
I felt that as an attack, so I was like, well, they're going to attack me.
我觉得这是一种攻击，所以我想，好吧，他们会攻击我。
I should attack first.
我应该先进攻。
There was points where I smacked teachers, throwing chairs, whatever.
有时我会打老师、扔椅子等等。
You name it.
你说出它的名字。
And since I was a little girl growing up, I never, never had an OK day.
自从我还是个小女孩以来，我就从来没有度过过美好的一天。
Do you understand me?
你了解我吗？
I never had anything like, you know, it's going to be cool today.
我从来没有经历过这样的事情，你知道，今天会很酷。
It's going to be OK.
一切都会好起来的。
You're not going to hear one of your friends dead, and you're not going to hear your dad coming in the house, beating up on your mom.
你不会听到你的一个朋友死了，你也不会听到你的爸爸进屋殴打你的妈妈。
You're not going to hear that.
你不会听到这个。
It's just going to be OK.
一切都会好起来的。
And that was just one of the things that-- I just go into a whole different world.
这只是其中一件事——我进入了一个完全不同的世界。
To hear Lucia tell it, she had never met kids like the ones in the theater group-- kids who were strong and independent, but who weren't in a gang.
听露西娅说，她从来没有遇到过像剧团里的孩子那样的人——坚强、独立，但不属于帮派的孩子。
And at first they were literally incomprehensible.
起初，他们确实难以理解。
The way they goofed around with each other, the way they talked to each other-- she'd just watch them, trying to understand why they acted the way they did.
他们互相闲聊的方式，他们互相交谈的方式——她只是看着他们，试图理解他们为什么这样做。
Why were they so happy all the time?
为什么他们一直这么开心？
I just started seeing, these kids weren't in gangs.
我刚刚开始发现，这些孩子并没有加入帮派。
And they had the time of their lives, you know?
他们度过了一生中最美好的时光，你知道吗？
And I had a lot of them telling me, you don't have to be there.
很多人告诉我，你不必在那里。
You don't have to do this and that.
你不必做这做那。
You mean, the MCW kids were saying, you don't have to be in a gang.
你的意思是，MCW 的孩子们说，你不必加入帮派。
And then just to hear somebody from my age to tell me that, that really turned me on.
然后只是听到与我同龄的人告诉我这件事，这真的让我兴奋不已。
I was like, huh.
我当时想，嗯。
To have this person's my age and they're thinking like this.
这个人跟我年纪一样大，却有这样的想法。
Why don't I think like that?
我为什么不这么想呢？
I always thought, man, what's wrong with me?
我总是想，伙计，我这是怎么了？
They were the only people in her life who were urging her to change, to quit the gang.
他们是她一生中唯一敦促她改变、退出帮派的人。
Everybody else in her life was either in the gang or close to it.
她生活中的其他人要么是这个帮派的成员，要么是与这个帮派关系密切的人。
And I should just point out, this is very common.
我应该指出，这种情况很常见。
So many gang kids that you meet in Chicago-- if you ask, is anybody trying to convince you to quit the gang?
你在芝加哥遇到这么多帮派孩子——如果你问，有人试图说服你退出帮派吗？
They'll tell you no.
他们会告诉你不。
And central to the change that Lucia had to go through was this whole idea of, what are you looking at?
露西亚必须经历的改变的核心是整个想法，你在看什么？
Is it OK for somebody to just look at you without it turning into some kind of fight?
有人只是看着你而不演变成某种争斗可以吗？
And for a long time, even in the theater group, she struggled, and she just thought, no.
而很长一段时间，即使是在剧组，她也很挣扎，她只是想，不。
And if you looked at me in any wrong way, no matter how you looked at me, man, you'll be dealt with.
如果你以任何错误的方式看我，无论你如何看我，伙计，你都会受到处理。
You know what's so weird, is that you got out of the whole thing by putting yourself in a position where you're onstage and people are looking at you.
你知道什么是最奇怪的，就是你把自己放在舞台上，人们都在看着你，从而摆脱了整个事情。
Yeah, exactly.
是的，完全正确。
I'll be like, wow, you know?
我会说，哇，你知道吗？
I guess I got to get used to it.
我想我必须习惯它。
I was thinking, I can't be attacking everybody who's looking at me doing the play.
我在想，我不能攻击所有看着我表演的人。
So you'd be standing onstage, in a play, in costume, and you'd look out, and you'd see all these people looking at you.
所以你站在舞台上，在一场戏剧中，穿着戏服，你向外看，你会看到所有这些人都在看着你。
And going through your mind would be--
在你的脑海中浮现会是——
Yeah, like, what the hell are you looking at?
是啊，就像，你到底在看什么？
[INAUDIBLE] What's your problem or whatever?
[听不清] 你有什么问题吗？
Yeah, just like, oh, what are they looking at me for?
是的，就像，哦，他们看我做什么？
Just like, man, should I tell them something?
就像，伙计，我应该告诉他们一些事情吗？
Should I go on the mike and say, do you all have a problem?
我应该对着麦克风说，你们有什么问题吗？
Should I be attacking?
我应该进攻吗？
This is what's going through my mind.
这就是我的想法。
A researcher at Stanford University named Shirley Brice Heath has done this remarkable study where she sent a team of researchers into 120 afterschool programs for kids over the course of 10 years.
斯坦福大学的一位名叫雪莉·布莱斯·希思 (Shirley Brice Heath) 的研究人员进行了这项非凡的研究，她派出一组研究人员在 10 年内为孩子们开展了 120 个课后项目。
And seven years into the study, she found this result that she was not even looking for.
经过七年的研究，她发现了这个她根本不想要的结果。
It turns out that arts programs were more effective in changing kids' lives than any other kind of program for kids.
事实证明，艺术项目比任何其他类型的儿童项目更能有效地改变孩子们的生活。
More than sports and academic programs, more than community service programs, the art kids not only tended to come from worse backgrounds than kids in the other programs-- that is, they were more likely to have a parent who was unemployed, they were more likely to have friends who were dropouts, they were more likely to get into fights at school.
不仅仅是体育和学术项目，不仅仅是社区服务项目，艺术孩子不仅往往比其他项目的孩子来自更糟糕的背景——也就是说，他们更有可能有失业的父母，他们更有可能有辍学的朋友，他们更有可能在学校打架。
But after being in these programs, they became kids who were more likely to read for pleasure, they were more likely to be in honor societies, get academic honors, they were more entrepreneurial, they started projects, they were more willing to teach other kids.
但参加这些项目后，他们成为更有可能以阅读为乐的孩子，他们更有可能加入荣誉社团，获得学术荣誉，他们更有创业精神，他们开始项目，他们更愿意教其他孩子。
Shirley Brice Heath said that's because the arts programs tended to involve kids in more complicated collaborations with each other.
雪莉·布莱斯·希思 (Shirley Brice Heath) 表示，这是因为艺术项目往往会让孩子们参与更复杂的相互合作。
They were just doing harder stuff, and they were critiquing it, and making big plans, and contingency plans, and reevaluating plans.
他们只是在做更困难的事情，他们在批评它，制定大计划、应急计划，并重新评估计划。
And they learned all these verbal skills.
他们学会了所有这些语言技能。
Her study also showed that although those programs are the most effective at helping the kids who are the most at risk in our society, they have a terrible time staying afloat.
她的研究还表明，尽管这些计划对于帮助我们社会中处境最危险的孩子来说是最有效的，但他们的生存却很艰难。
Nine out of ten of them can't find funding sources and die within eight years.
其中十分之九的人找不到资金来源并在八年内死亡。
The program that Lucia was in is constantly struggling for money.
露西亚所在的项目一直在为资金而苦苦挣扎。
Music Theatre Workshop, great program.
音乐剧工作坊，很棒的节目。
Constantly struggling for funding.
不断地为资金而苦苦挣扎。
I asked Lucia if it mattered that this was an arts group that she was in, that they were doing a play.
我问露西亚，她所在的艺术团体正在表演戏剧，这是否重要。
Wouldn't she have changed if she had fallen in with any group of kids who she liked, who were not in gangs, who she could get to know this way?
如果她和任何一个她喜欢的、不属于帮派的、她能通过这种方式认识的孩子在一起，她不就会改变吗？
And she said, absolutely not.
她说，绝对不是。
She said part of what helped her change so much, part of what helped her quit the gang and go to school had specifically to do with the fact that it was a play, that it was art doing what art does, if you're lucky, which is change you.
她说，帮助她改变如此之大的部分因素，部分帮助她退出帮派并去上学的部分因素，与它是一部戏剧这一事实有关，它是艺术在做艺术所做的事情，如果你幸运的话，这会改变你。
I think the play did it a lot, the play itself.
我认为这部剧做了很多，剧本身。
Because like I said, since it was part of my life story and stuff, and playing it-- since you're doing it over and over, it's like one of the things that you're just letting it go.
因为就像我说的，因为这是我生活故事和东西的一部分，并且玩它——因为你一遍又一遍地这样做，这就像你只是放手的事情之一。
You put just everything.
你把所有东西都放了。
Like how can I say it?
比如我该怎么说呢？
The whole drama skit of your whole life, just on paper.
你一生的全部戏剧小品，都在纸上。
Let it fly away, whatever.
让它飞走吧，无论如何。
Let it be thrown in the garbage.
让它扔进垃圾桶吧。
Just-- it happened.
只是——它发生了。
Time to move on.
是时候继续前进了。
Lucia Lopez Yeah.
露西娅·洛佩兹 是的。
Exactly.
确切地。
Just live on, just live on with peace, finally.
继续生活，最后平静地生活。
So that's one of the good things.
所以这是一件好事。
Just with peace.
只要心平气和。
And going to sleep better.
并且睡得更好。
Well, it seemed wrong to fly all the way to New York from Chicago, to this huge, beautiful theater right off Broadway, and tell Lucia's story, and not give her the chance to come and perform herself.
好吧，从芝加哥一路飞到纽约，来到百老汇旁这座巨大而美丽的剧院，讲述露西娅的故事，却不给她亲自表演的机会，这似乎是错误的。
So doing a scene adapted from her Music Theatre Workshop play, please welcome 18-year-old Lucia Lopez.
因此，请欢迎18岁的露西娅·洛佩兹（Lucia Lopez）根据她的音乐戏剧工作室戏剧改编的场景。
[APPLAUSE] Lucia Lopez They call it a walk by.
[掌声]露西娅·洛佩兹 他们称之为步行。
It's five or six guys from another gang coming in slowly.
另一个帮派的五六个人慢慢地进来了。
Screaming and representing, wearing the masks on their face.
尖叫和代表，脸上戴着面具。
Bullets are flying everywhere.
子弹到处乱飞。
And then I see Roberto, my brother's best friend, on the ground, holding his chest while he was trying to breathe.
然后我看到我哥哥最好的朋友罗伯托躺在地上，捂着胸口试图呼吸。
A lot of the ladies in the neighborhood start screaming from the windows, "We call 911!" The old ladies are praying with the rosaries.
附近的许多女士开始从窗户里尖叫：“我们拨打 911！”老太太们正在拿着念珠祈祷。
Then the cops come to investigate.
随后警察前来调查。
It takes a long time before the ambulance shows up.
等了很长时间救护车才出现。
The cops even have time to question us, question the neighbors, and look in the bushes.
警察甚至有时间盘问我们、盘问邻居、查看灌木丛。
The ambulance guys move really slowly.
救护人员的动作非常缓慢。
They pull out the stretcher.
他们拉出担架。
They talk to the cops.
他们与警察交谈。
We scream at them, "Do something!"
我们对他们尖叫：“做点什么吧！”
Meanwhile, two other guys who shot Roberto are walking around, making sure he's dying.
与此同时，另外两个射杀罗伯托的人正在四处走动，确保他快死了。
If he doesn't die, then they'll wait to do another walk by.
如果他没有死，那么他们就会等待再次经过。
So they change their clothes so we can't recognize them.
所以他们换了衣服，这样我们就认不出他们了。
They took a look around to see who else is there or to see who they'll go after when they come back.
他们环顾四周，看看还有谁在那里，或者看看他们回来后会追捕谁。
Roberto's still breathing.
罗伯托还有呼吸。
Everyone's telling the paramedics to hurry up while the ladies are still yelling at them in Spanish.
每个人都在告诉医护人员快点，而女士们仍在用西班牙语对他们大喊大叫。
[SPEAKING SPANISH] I hope it happens to you.
[说西班牙语]我希望这发生在你身上。
The paramedics just take a look at them like, what are you saying?
医护人员只是看着他们，你在说什么？
They take a look at Roberto.
他们看了看罗伯托。
They see his baggy clothes, his gang colors, his gold chain.
他们看到他宽松的衣服、他的帮派色彩、他的金链子。
They see that he is Mexican and they don't care.
他们知道他是墨西哥人，但他们不在乎。
They don't want to go near him.
他们不想靠近他。
They don't want to touch him.
他们不想碰他。
But I see him, bleeding with his eyes, breathing, trying to grasp what little life he had left.
但我看到他的眼睛在流血，呼吸着，试图抓住他仅存的一点生命。
One of the paramedics says, "Why should we even bother?
一名护理人员说：“我们何必费心呢？
He's in a gang.
他在一个帮派里。
We fix him up and he'll just got shot again." I'm thinking to myself, he's still alive.
我们把他修好，他就会再次中弹。”我心里想，他还活着。
He heard them say this.
他听到他们这么说。
His eyes are looking into mine.
他的眼睛正在看着我。
Please, get them to do something.
请让他们做点什么。
Finally, they pick up Roberto.
最后，他们接走了罗伯托。
They throw him in the ambulance, slam the door shut, and drive off.
他们把他扔进救护车，关上门，然后开走了。
Everybody stands there a moment, not knowing what to do.
每个人都站在那里，不知道该怎么办。
But I wanted to run after them.
但我想追他们。
Strangle them.
勒死他们。
Show them what we have to go through.
向他们展示我们必须经历的事情。
Walk over their dying bodies and do nothing.
走过他们垂死的尸体，什么也不做。
But instead, I turned around like everyone else and went home.
但我却像其他人一样转身回家了。
Roberto died before he even got to the hospital, before his mother even got to see him.
罗伯托在到达医院之前、他的母亲还没来得及见到他之前就去世了。
The only people with him when he died were those paramedics.
当他去世时，唯一陪伴在他身边的人就是那些护理人员。
He spent his last moments of his life with those three guys.
他和这三个人一起度过了生命的最后时刻。
Lucia Lopez.
露西娅·洛佩兹。
[MUSIC - "SHE'S ACTUAL SIZE" BY THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS]
[音乐 - 他们可能是巨人的“她的实际尺寸”]
They Might Be Giants.
他们可能是巨人。
Coming up-- climb every mountain, ford every stream, follow every rainbow.
向上——攀登每座山峰，涉过每一条溪流，追随每一条彩虹。
Just do it without me.
不用我就做吧。
That's in a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.
一分钟后，国际公共广播电台将继续我们的节目。
It's This American Life .
这就是美国生活。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Coming to you today from the stage of Town Hall in New York City.
今天在纽约市市政厅的舞台上为您带来。
Each week on the program, of course, we choose a theme, invite a variety of writers and performers to take a whack at that theme.
当然，每周的节目中，我们都会选择一个主题，邀请各种作家和表演者来尝试这个主题。
Today, from the stage, with hundreds of people looking at us-- What Are You Lookin' At?
今天，在舞台上，数百人看着我们——你在看什么？
We've arrived at Act Three of our program.
我们已经到了节目的第三幕了。
Act Three, Climb Every Mountain.
第三幕，攀登每一座山。
Adulthood means, among other things, pretending to be confident in situations where you feel anything but.
成年意味着，除其他外，在你感觉不到的情况下假装自信。
"What are you looking at?" is the question that blares through our heads in moments when it feels like the veneer of adulthood is not convincing anyone.
“你在看什么？”当我们感觉成年的外表无法说服任何人时，这个问题就会在我们的脑海中响起。
David Rakoff was born in Toronto, moved to New York when he was a teenager.
大卫·拉考夫出生于多伦多，青少年时期移居纽约。
He has so successfully learned to pass himself off as a native New Yorker that usually even he believes he's one.
他如此成功地学会了把自己冒充为土生土长的纽约人，以至于通常连他自己也相信自己是纽约人。
The only problem is, sometimes he has to actually leave the five boroughs of New York City.
唯一的问题是，有时他实际上必须离开纽约市的五个区。
Please welcome David Rakoff.
欢迎大卫·拉科夫。
[APPLAUSE] David Rakoff I do not go outdoors.
[掌声] 大卫·拉科夫 我不去户外。
Not more than I have to.
不超过我必须做的。
As far as I'm concerned, the whole point of living in New York City is indoors.
就我而言，住在纽约市的全部意义在于室内。
You want greenery?
你想要绿化吗？
Order the spinach.
点菠菜。
Paradoxically, I am being sent by an outdoor adventure magazine to climb a mountain on Christmas Day with a man named Larry Davis.
矛盾的是，一本户外探险杂志派我在圣诞节和一个名叫拉里·戴维斯的人一起爬山。
Larry has climbed Mount Monadnock in southwestern New Hampshire every day for the last five plus years.
在过去五年多的时间里，拉里每天都会攀登新罕布什尔州西南部的莫纳德诺克山。
I will join him on ascent number 2,065.
我将与他一起登上 2,065 号攀登点。
The trip up to New Hampshire will involve a tiny plane from Boston.
前往新罕布什尔州的旅程将乘坐一架从波士顿起飞的小型飞机。
I tear my medicine cabinet apart like Billie Holiday and still only uncover one Xanax.
我像比莉·哈乐黛一样把我的药柜拆开，但仍然只发现了一颗阿普唑仑。
The hiking boots the magazine sent me to buy, large, ungainly potato-like things that I've been trying to break in for the past four days, cut into my feet and draw blood as if they were lined with cheese graters.
杂志寄给我买的登山靴，很大，像土豆一样的笨重东西，在过去的四天里我一直试图闯入它们，它们会刺破我的脚并流血，就像它们衬有奶酪刨丝器一样。
I have come to hate these Timberlands with a fervor I usually reserve for people.
我对这些 Timberlands 的憎恨程度就像我通常对人们保留的那样。
Just think, the shoes I wouldn't be caught dead in might just turn out to be the shoes I am caught dead in.
试想一下，我不会被困住的鞋子可能会成为我被困住的鞋子。
It bears mentioning here that Monadnock is not Everest.
这里值得一提的是，莫纳德诺克不是珠穆朗玛峰。
It is 3,000 feet high and the most climbed mountain in the world.
它高 3,000 英尺，是世界上攀登次数最多的山峰。
It's not even a real mountain.
它甚至不是一座真正的山。
I do not let this sway me from my worrying.
我不会让这动摇我的担忧。
I have other reasons for concern.
我还有其他理由担心。
My status as an adult perpetually teeters on the verge of being exposed as a sham and revoked.
我作为成年人的身份永远在被揭露为骗子并被撤销的边缘摇摇欲坠。
Plus, I am only playing at reporter here.
另外，我在这里只是扮演记者的角色。
I have, up to this point, relied upon my relentlessly jokey, glib, runny-mouthed logorrhea and the unwarranted good graces of magazine editors who just let me make stuff up.
到目前为止，我一直依赖于我无休止的滑稽、油嘴滑舌、流口水的多言以及杂志编辑们毫无根据的好意，他们只是让我编造一些东西。
I have never been sent anywhere on someone else's dime, and it takes all of my strength not to call my editor and tell him that the jig is finally up, that I cannot do this piece.
我从来没有用别人的钱被派到任何地方，而且我花了尽全力才不打电话给我的编辑并告诉他一切终于结束了，我不能做这篇文章。
It seems too bad that the jig has to be up so far from my home in New York, with its excitement, bright lights, and major teaching hospitals.
看起来太糟糕了，吉格必须在离我纽约的家那么远的地方进行，那里充满了兴奋、明亮的灯光和主要的教学医院。
The central drama of my life is about being a fraud, alas.
唉，我一生的中心戏剧就是关于成为一个骗子。
that's a complete lie, really.
这完全是一个谎言，真的。
The central drama in my life is actually about being lonely and thin, but fraudulence gets a fair amount of play.
我生活中的中心戏剧实际上是关于孤独和瘦弱，但欺诈也得到了相当多的关注。
At the connecting airline at the Boston airport, I sit, the only dark-haired person among the broad-faced butter-eaters, wondering if my outdoors journalist drag-- flannel shirt, jeans, most hated boots of Satan's workshop, down jacket-- is fooling anybody.
在波士顿机场的转机航班上，我坐在宽脸黄油食者中，是唯一的黑发人，想知道我的户外记者装束——法兰绒衬衫、牛仔裤、撒旦工作室最讨厌的靴子、羽绒服——是否在愚弄任何人。
A brief flight and half a Xanax later, I land in New Hampshire, horrified to learn that the place where I'll be staying is a bed and breakfast, not a hotel.
经过短暂的飞行和半片阿普唑仑后，我降落在新罕布什尔州，震惊地发现我要住的地方是一家住宿加早餐旅馆，而不是一家酒店。
My heart sinks.
我的心沉了下去。
That means there is probably neither television nor phone in my room, and I have very little patience for what is generally labeled charming.
这意味着我的房间里可能既没有电视也没有电话，而且我对通常被标记为迷人的东西几乎没有耐心。
In particular, country charm.
尤其是乡村魅力。
I have an intense dislike of flowered wallpaper.
我非常不喜欢带花的壁纸。
Ditto jam of all sorts.
各种果酱也是如此。
The former is in all-too-abundant evidence when I enter, and the latter, I'm sure, lies in ominous wait somewhere in the cheery kitchen.
当我进入时，前者有太多的证据，而后者，我确信，在愉快的厨房的某个地方等待着不祥的等待。
There is a knotty pine bar off the entrance hall with a settee with several embroidered pillows.
门厅旁有一个多节松木吧台，里面有一张长椅，上面有几个绣花枕头。
"I'd rather be golfing." "On the eighth day, God created golf." "Golfers have sex in some humorous, golf-related manner." Et cetera.
“我宁愿去打高尔夫球。” “第八天，上帝创造了高尔夫。” “高尔夫球手以某种幽默的、与高尔夫相关的方式做爱。”等等。
The proprietress is the kind of tall, stalwart woman of a certain age that used to be called "handsome." She is approximately nine feet tall.
老板娘是那种身材高大伟岸，到了一定年纪，以前被称为“帅哥”的女人。她大约九英尺高。
Her eyes are blue, resolute.
她的眼睛是蓝色的，坚定。
Her faithful dog Charlie at her side.
她忠实的狗查理在她身边。
She smiles at me warmly and introduces herself as Annie, extending a hand the size of a frying pan.
她对我热情地微笑，介绍自己是安妮，伸出一只煎锅大小的手。
"You must be Dave," she says.
“你一定是戴夫，”她说。
In New England, everyone calls you Dave, regardless of however many times you might introduce yourself as David.
在新英格兰，每个人都叫你戴夫，无论你多少次介绍自己为大卫。
I'm reminded of those fanatically religious homophobes who stand on the steps of Saint Patrick's Cathedral during gay pride, holding signs that say, "Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve." I have always wanted to go up to them and say, well, of course not Adam and Steve.
我想起了那些狂热的宗教恐同者，他们在同性恋骄傲节期间站在圣帕特里克大教堂的台阶上，举着标语，上面写着“亚当和夏娃，而不是亚当和史蒂夫”。我一直想走到他们跟前说，好吧，当然不是亚当和史蒂夫。
Never Adam and Steve.
从来没有亚当和史蒂夫。
It's Adam and Steven.
这是亚当和史蒂文。
[LAUGHTER] "You're in room three," she continues.
[笑声]“你在三号房间，”她继续说道。
"Why don't you go into the dining room, and have some lunch, and then we'll talk some.
“你不如去餐厅吃点午饭，然后我们再聊聊。
Come on, Charlie dog." In spite of myself, I am charmed.
来吧，查理狗。”我不由自主地被迷住了。
She puts on a dark green slicker and knee-high Wellingtons and is out the door, presumably to chop the ice off the pond, deliver a calf, or simply raise a barn.
她穿上一件深绿色的雨衣和及膝的威灵顿雨衣，走出门去，大概是为了砍掉池塘上的冰，生一头小牛，或者只是建造一个谷仓。
I eat a club sandwich and drink some coffee to try to eradicate my Xanax buzz.
我吃了一个俱乐部三明治，喝了一些咖啡，试图消除我的 Xanax 嗡嗡声。
I am trying to appear legitimate, masculine, adult, like I deserve to be there.
我努力让自己显得合法、阳刚、成熟，就像我应得的那样。
Larry Davis stops by the inn.
拉里·戴维斯在旅馆停下来。
I shake his hand in a hardy, hale, fellow-well-met way.
我以一种坚韧、精神饱满、和蔼可亲的方式握着他的手。
As my reward, he gives me dispensation to climb the next day in my $20 plastic Payless shoes.
作为奖励，他允许我第二天穿着价值 20 美元的 Payless 塑料鞋攀登。
I realize I've done almost no research for this trip, so I walk into downtown Jaffrey to check things out.
我意识到我几乎没有为这次旅行做任何研究，所以我走进贾弗里市中心去看看。
This seems to smack to me of journalistic realness, a kind of topography as destiny, New Journalism, Joan Didion opening, perhaps.
在我看来，这似乎带有新闻真实性的味道，一种命运的地形，新新闻主义，也许是琼·迪迪安的开场白。
I am taking notes by speaking into a little tape recorder.
我正在对着一个小录音机说话做笔记。
Perhaps that is what attracts attention.
也许这就是吸引人们注意的地方。
Or perhaps it is that there is not another living creature out at 5:00 PM on Christmas Eve, because a car passes and immediately circles back.
或者可能是平安夜下午 5:00 没有其他生物在外面，因为一辆汽车经过并立即绕回来。
The driver rolls down his window and asks me if I want a lift.
司机摇下车窗，问我是否需要搭便车。
I do not.
我不知道。
But "how nice," I think.
但我想“多好啊”。
He drives on.
他继续开车。
I'm charmed by the congeniality of this interchange.
我被这种友好的交流所吸引。
How friendly.
多么友好啊。
How uncreepy.
多么令人毛骨悚然。
I speak too soon.
我说得太快了。
He circles back.
他转回来。
He hands me a rectangular package in tartan wrapping paper.
他递给我一个用格子呢包装纸包裹的长方形包裹。
"Take this.
“拿着这个。
The most-watched video in the world," he says.
世界上观看次数最多的视频，”他说。
This man is giving me a copy of Forrest Gump ?
这个人给了我一本《阿甘正传》？
"It's The Life of Jesus.
“这是耶稣的一生。
" I beg off politely, claiming Judaic immunity.
“我礼貌地请求离开，声称犹太教豁免权。
He drives on.
他继续开车。
Here's an interrupting thought.
这是一个打断的想法。
If your therapist calls to reschedule your appointment, as mine did just at the moment I finished writing this part of the story, and you make him laugh, as always, and if in wrapping up, you say, "Well, I'll see you on Wednesday at 12:30 then," and he responds, "I'm looking forward to it," is that bad?
如果你的治疗师打电话来重新安排你的预约，就像我的治疗师在我写完故事的这一部分时所做的那样，你像往常一样让他笑了，如果在结束时你说，“好吧，那么我周三中午 12:30 见”，他回答说，“我很期待它，”那是不是很糟糕？
I return to the inn, now wreathed in the kind of Christmas-in-New-England, warm-hearthed cheery verisimilitude that Ralph Lauren would burn down a synagogue to achieve.
我回到旅店，这里充满了新英格兰圣诞节的气氛，充满了拉尔夫·劳伦烧毁一座犹太教堂才能达到的温暖、欢乐的真实感。
Nat King Cole's Christmas album plays at tooth-loosening decibels.
纳特·金·科尔 (Nat King Cole) 的圣诞专辑以令人牙齿松动的分贝播放。
I go upstairs and continue reading the new Truman Capote biography.
我上楼继续阅读新的杜鲁门·卡波特传记。
The inn starts to fill up with families and couples who have come for Christmas Eve dinner.
旅馆里开始挤满了前来吃平安夜晚餐的家庭和情侣。
Alone, Jewish, and awash in unkind thoughts about Christmas and the countryside as I am, I stay out of sight, for the most part.
我是一个孤独的犹太人，对圣诞节和乡村充满了不友善的想法，所以大部分时间我都远离人们的视线。
I can hear general revelry and prandial merriment coming from the dining room.
我能听到餐厅里传来普遍的狂欢和用餐的欢乐声。
Finally, I head directly into the bar of golf pillows.
最后，我直接走进了高尔夫枕头吧。
Annie is there with a couple.
安妮和一对夫妇在那里。
"Merry Christmas, Dave," she greets me.
“圣诞快乐，戴夫，”她向我打招呼。
A retired airline pilot sits at the bar enjoying a decidedly un-New England cocktail with an orange slice, maraschino cherry, and pineapple spear crowding the glass.
一位退休的航空公司飞行员坐在酒吧里，享用着一杯绝对非新英格兰风格的鸡尾酒，杯中挤满了橙子片、黑樱桃和菠萝矛。
The bartender is a woman in a sweater knit with a portrait of a family of snow people.
调酒师是一位身穿针织雪人一家人肖像毛衣的女人。
The wife of the couple also wears a sweater, knit with a smiling, holly-festooned teddy bear.
这对夫妇的妻子也穿着一件毛衣，上面织着一只微笑的、装饰着冬青树的泰迪熊。
The husband presents Annie with a very well-rendered framed watercolor of a widemouth bass.
丈夫向安妮赠送了一幅画得非常精美的宽口鲈鱼水彩画。
It's really very good, and I say so.
这真的非常好，我就是这么说的。
"Well, we'll put it here to keep you company," says Annie, propping the frame up on the bar stool next to mine.
“好吧，我们会把它放在这里陪伴你，”安妮说，一边把框架放在我旁边的吧台凳上。
I make sure to look at it attentively, my face frozen into the art appreciation rictus until Annie and the couple go into the dining room.
我一定要仔细地看它，我的脸冻结在艺术欣赏的裂口中，直到安妮和这对夫妇走进餐厅。
Cricking my neck, I order a steak and a red wine.
我摇摇头，点了一份牛排和一杯红酒。
"Are you the writer?" the bartender asks me.
“你是作家吗？”调酒师问我。
"The writer." Finally.
“作家。”最后。
Despite the fact, or precisely because this is just what I wanted, I reply, my voice far too bright, "Oh, god, no. I'm a complete idiot." She doesn't entirely know how to take this.
尽管如此，或者正是因为这正是我想要的，我回答道，我的声音太明亮了，“哦，上帝，不。我是个十足的白痴。”她完全不知道该如何接受这个。
She gives me the careful half-smile one levels at a very large, possibly erratic dog.
她小心翼翼地对我微笑，就像一只体型巨大、可能性格古怪的狗一样。
The pilot is the anti-me, a man so utterly comfortable with himself that he can drink a cocktail with no fewer than three different pieces of fruit in it, and still seem the very picture of adulthood.
飞行员是一个反我的人，一个对自己非常满意的人，他可以喝一杯至少有三种不同水果的鸡尾酒，而且看起来仍然是成年的景象。
He talks a while about fixing up houses.
他谈了一会儿关于修理房子的事。
It's what he does in his retirement.
这就是他退休后所做的事情。
His voice is velvet-soft and Atticus Finch-authoritative.
他的声音如天鹅绒般柔软，具有阿提克斯·芬奇的权威。
But there's a sad whiff of mortality, a smell of old leaves, underneath everything he speaks of.
但在他所说的一切之下，有一种悲伤的死亡气息，一种老树叶的味道。
It's a bit like watching This Old House hosted by Baudelaire.
这有点像看波德莱尔主持的《这座老房子》。
The pilot leaves fairly early in the evening.
飞行员在晚上很早就起飞了。
I hope he had somewhere to go.
我希望他有地方可去。
Then again, I think, I don't have anywhere to go.
话又说回来，我想，我没有地方可去。
Why am I so concerned with the imagined loneliness of a total stranger?
为什么我如此关心想象中的陌生人的孤独感？
Then again again, I actually am somewhere.
话又说回来，我实际上在某个地方。
I'm sitting in a bar of a New England inn on Christmas Eve.
平安夜，我坐在新英格兰一家旅馆的酒吧里。
I am the writer, eating a steak, drinking alone, talking to the bartender.
我是作家，吃着牛排，独自喝酒，与调酒师交谈。
And even though I loathe animals, I lazily toss bits of popcorn to Charlie as he sits at the foot of my bar stool.
尽管我讨厌动物，但当查理坐在我的吧台凳脚下时，我还是懒洋洋地向他扔了一些爆米花。
It's just me and the bartender and my faithful dog.
只有我、调酒师和我忠实的狗。
Plus my date, the widemouth bass, whom I've been ignoring.
再加上我的约会对象，宽口鲈鱼，我一直忽视它。
I fairly drip with authenticity now.
我现在相当真实。
I have let go of my paranoia about being scrutinized.
我已经摆脱了对受到审查的偏执。
I feel completely comfortable.
我感觉非常舒服。
So comfortable, in fact, that inexplicably, I find myself asking the bartender if there's either a synagogue or a gay bar in Jaffrey.
事实上，如此舒适，以至于令人费解，我发现自己问酒保贾弗里是否有犹太教堂或同性恋酒吧。
I clearly feel the need to out myself to her in every possible way.
我清楚地感到有必要以各种可能的方式向她展示自己。
Why stop there, I wonder, and not just go ahead and ask if there is a Canadian consulate nearby?
我想知道为什么停在那里，而不是直接询问附近是否有加拿大领事馆？
She keeps refilling my wine glass as we talk.
我们谈话时，她不断地给我倒酒杯。
She cuts me an enormous piece of baklava.
她给我切了一大块果仁蜜饼。
More popcorn for the dog.
多给狗吃爆米花。
I have a mountain to climb in the morning, damn it.
我早上还有一座山要爬，该死的。
My reverie is undone by the strange series of glottal kecks and surds coming from below.
从下面传来的一系列奇怪的声门卡克声和嘶嘶声打破了我的遐想。
I look down to Charlie dog, whose neck is arching forward and back in an ominously regular, reverse peristaltic fashion.
我低头看着查理狗，它的脖子以一种不祥的规律、反向蠕动的方式前后拱起。
I find the words as my voice Dopplers up to a fairly effeminate and vaguely hysterical pitch.
我发现这些话就像我的声音多普勒一样，达到了相当女性化和隐约歇斯底里的音调。
"I think the dog might be getting sick.
“我认为这只狗可能生病了。
The dog is getting sick.
狗病了。
Oh my [UNINTELLIGIBLE], the dog is sick!"
哦天哪[无法理解]，那只狗病了！”
Charlie vomits out a small, viscous puddle for which, from my quick and queasy perusal, I am largely responsible.
查理吐出了一个小而粘稠的水坑，从我快速而令人作呕的细读来看，这在很大程度上是我造成的。
The bartender cleans it up without a second glance.
调酒师看也不看一眼就把它清理干净了。
Thoroughly unmasked, I settle up for dinner and take myself upstairs to sleep.
我彻底摘掉口罩，吃完晚饭，然后上楼睡觉。
And to all a good night.
祝大家晚安。
The climb hardly bears mentioning.
攀登的过程几乎不值一提。
It was fairly awful-- cold, slippery, kind of arduous, in the middle of an ice storm.
这是相当可怕的——寒冷、湿滑、有点艰苦，而且是在冰暴之中。
Although kind of monochromatically silvery, pale, and glamorous at the top.
尽管顶部呈单色银色、苍白且迷人。
A lot of the talk focuses on "1028's." "Think we'll see any 1028's?" "She was a real 1028." "All we need is some 1028's to make this a perfect Christmas." "1028" is code for babes.
很多讨论都集中在“1028”。 “你认为我们会看到 1028 吗？” “她是一个真正的1028。” “我们只需要一些 1028 就能让这个圣诞节变得完美。” “1028”是宝贝的代号。
I realize that everything about me-- my inappropriate footwear, my effete lexicon, my unfamiliarity with such natural phenomena as trees, rock, and ice-- are all met with great equanimity and good grace.
我意识到我身上的一切——我不合适的鞋子、我失效的词汇、我对树木、岩石和冰等自然现象的不熟悉——都得到了极大的平静和优雅。
They're friendly.
他们很友好。
It becomes quite clear to me that the only one casting strange glances of disapproval my way is me.
我很清楚，唯一一个对我的方式投来奇怪的不赞成目光的人就是我自己。
At the summit, I made Larry take my picture a number of times.
在山顶，我多次让拉里给我拍照。
When the film comes back, I will look at the photos of myself, scanning them for evidence.
当电影回来时，我会看自己的照片，扫描它们以寻找证据。
Looking for the face of an adult, the face of a man who climbs mountains, the face of a Dave.
寻找一个成年人的脸，一个爬山的人的脸，一个戴夫的脸。
Thank you.
谢谢。
David Rakoff.
大卫·拉考夫.
Credits Ira Glass Well, our program was produced today by Julie Snyder and myself with Alix Spiegel and Nancy Updike.
图片来源：Ira Glass 嗯，我们的节目今天由 Julie Snyder 和我本人以及 Alix Spiegel 和 Nancy Updike 制作。
Our musicians, John Linnell, John Flansburgh, Dan Miller, Dan Hickey, Dan Levine, Danny Weinkauf, and Jim O'Connor.
我们的音乐家约翰·林内尔、约翰·弗兰斯堡、丹·米勒、丹·希基、丹·莱文、丹尼·温考夫和吉姆·奥康纳。
Production help from Emi Takahara, Sylvia Lemus, Chris Ladd, and Todd Bachmann.
Emi Takahara、Sylvia Lemus、Chris Ladd 和 Todd Bachmann 为制作提供帮助。
[ACKNOWLEDGMENTS] Onstage, this show has lasted for an hour and a half.
[鸣谢] 舞台上，这场演出持续了一个半小时。
If you want to hear the entire thing, unedited, visit our website, www.thisamericanlife.org.
如果您想听未经编辑的完整内容，请访问我们的网站 www.thisamericanlife.org。
Or you know you can download today's program in our archives at audible.com/thisamericanlife.
或者您知道可以在我们的档案库中下载今天的节目：audible.com/thisamericanlife。
This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
[FUNDING CREDITS] WBEZ management oversight for our program by Mr. Torey Malatia, who says this to me at least once a week--
[资金来源] Torey Malatia 先生对我们项目的 WBEZ 管理监督，他每周至少对我说一次——
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Back next week with more stories of This American Life.
下周我们将带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。