117: You Gonna Eat That? - This American Life
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00:00 00:00 Transcript Share This American Life Life Partners How to Listen Episodes Recommended About Overview Staff Announcements Fellowships Jobs Music Make Radio On The Road FAQ Submissions Merch Contact Us Our Other Shows Merch Follow Us Life Partners Subscribe to our newsletter Full episode Toggle Audio and Transcript Sync Transcript | Episode #117 | December 11, 1998 117: You Gonna Eat That?
00:00 00:00 文字记录 分享此 美国生活 生活伙伴 如何收听 剧集 推荐 关于 概述 员工公告 奖学金 工作 音乐 在路上制作电台 常见问题解答 提交 商品 联系我们 我们的其他节目 商品 关注我们 生活伙伴 订阅我们的时事通讯 整集 切换音频和文字记录同步 文字记录 | 内容第 117 集 | 1998 年 12 月 11 日 117：你要吃那个吗？
Note: This American Life is produced for the ear and designed to be heard.
注：《美国生活》是为耳朵而制作的，旨在让人们听到。
If you are able, we strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page.
如果可以的话，我们强烈建议您收听音频，其中包括页面上没有的情感和重点。
Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors.
文字记录是使用语音识别软件和人工转录员结合生成的，可能包含错误。
Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.
请在印刷版引用前检查相应的音频。
Prologue Ira Glass Every night, when I was a kid, my family would sit down to dinner together.
序言 艾拉·格拉斯 当我还是个孩子的时候，每天晚上，我的家人都会一起坐下来吃晚饭。
And every night, as best as I can remember, when the meal was done, my mom would take the ice from her glass, tip it back into her mouth, and chew on it loudly.
每天晚上，据我所知，吃完饭后，妈妈都会从杯子里取出冰块，倒回嘴里，大声咀嚼。
And every night, all of us would ask her, "Please don't crunch the ice.
每天晚上，我们所有人都会问她：“请不要咬碎冰块。
Please never, ever, ever do that again." And every night, she would ignore this request.
请永远、永远、永远不要再这样做。”而每天晚上，她都会无视这个要求。
And in retrospect, I have to say, I got to hand it to my mom.
回想起来，我不得不说，我必须把它交给我妈妈。
She is not somebody to be pushed around.
她不是一个任人摆布的人。
This is just who she is.
这就是她。
She is willful.
她很任性。
She gets her way.
她如愿以偿。
It's something to be admired.
这是一件值得钦佩的事情。
And of course, this story happened at the dinner table.
当然，这个故事发生在餐桌上。
The dinner table is the stage for so many family dramas.
餐桌是许多家庭戏剧的舞台。
Today on our program, we bring you three stories about families at mealtime.
今天在我们的节目中，我们为您带来三个关于家庭用餐时间的故事。
From WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life.
来自芝加哥 WBEZ 和国际公共广播电台的《This American Life》。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Today's program, You Gonna Eat That?
今天的节目，你要吃那个吗？
Three families, three stories, in three acts.
三个家庭，三个故事，三幕。
Act one, Breakfast, a story of eating and not eating, and what you learn when you view the world through the prism of a single meal.
第一幕，早餐，一个关于吃和不吃的故事，以及当你通过一顿饭的棱镜观察世界时你学到了什么。
Act two, Lunch, we hear a father's lament about sippy cups, chewing with your mouth closed, and why it is not good to apply tape to the cat.
第二幕，午餐，我们听到一位父亲对吸管杯、闭着嘴咀嚼的抱怨，以及为什么给猫贴胶带不好。
Act three, Dinner.
第三幕，晚餐。
We have a story from Dave Eggers about what family dinner's like when the parents are suddenly gone, and the kids are left to run things themselves.
戴夫·埃格斯（Dave Eggers）给我们讲了一个故事，讲述了当父母突然去世，孩子们独自处理事情时，家庭晚餐会是什么样子。
Stay with us.
留在我们身边。
Act One, Breakfast.
第一幕，早餐。
In every family, there are the family legends that everyone in the family repeats over and over.
每个家庭，都有着家中每个人一遍又一遍重复的家族传奇。
And then there are the stories that are suppressed, disappeared with a kind of Stalinist thoroughness.
还有一些故事被压制，以一种斯大林主义的彻底性消失。
This next story falls more into that second camp than the first.
下一个故事比第一个更属于第二个阵营。
It lay dormant for a long time before Annie Cheney decided to tell it here.
在安妮·切尼决定在这里讲述它之前，它已经休眠了很长一段时间。
It was produced by Jay Allison.
它是由杰·艾利森制作的。
This morning for breakfast, I had a toasted everything bagel with eggs and cheese and a cup of Earl Gray tea with--
今天早上早餐，我吃了一个烤面包圈，里面有鸡蛋和奶酪，还有一杯伯爵茶——
A reporter where I used to work taught me to ask people what they had for breakfast at the beginning of an interview.
我曾经工作过的一位记者教我在采访开始时询问人们早餐吃什么。
He said it was a good way to set your recording levels.
他说这是设置录音电平的好方法。
In 1996, Seattle police officers faced a tense situation when they were called out--
1996年，西雅图警察在被叫出时面临着紧张的局面——
That's me on the radio in Seattle.
那是西雅图广播里的我。
I was a reporter for a public station.
我是一家公共电视台的记者。
They didn't pay me or anything.
他们没有付钱给我什么的。
I was just a volunteer.
我只是一名志愿者。
But I was still a reporter.
但我仍然是一名记者。
I had a microphone and a tape recorder, and I went to press conferences.
我有麦克风和录音机，我去参加新闻发布会。
--department, they flooded it with tear gas.
——部门，他们用催泪瓦斯淹没了它。
I wasn't very good at it.
我不太擅长。
I couldn't stand being told what to say, and I was too cowardly to figure out the truth for myself.
我无法忍受别人告诉我该说什么，而且我太懦弱，无法自己弄清楚真相。
--came out firing his gun, and officers retaliated, shooting him nine times.
——出来开枪，警察进行报复，向他开了九枪。
A lot of times, the most revealing response I got from people was what they had for breakfast.
很多时候，我从人们那里得到的最能说明问题的反应就是他们早餐吃什么。
And it was the most interesting to me.
这对我来说是最有趣的。
--program is working.
--程序正在运行。
I'm Annie Cheney for KUOW, 94.9, public radio.
我是公共广播电台 KUOW 94.9 的安妮·切尼。
So I decided to follow my instincts and tell a story about breakfast.
所以我决定跟随我的直觉，讲述一个关于早餐的故事。
I got on a plane to New York, and I looked up my old friend, Vivian.
我登上了飞往纽约的飞机，我拜访了我的老朋友维维安。
OK, so tell me what you had for breakfast.
好吧，告诉我你早餐吃什么。
Oh my god, you don't really want to know.
天啊，你不会真的想知道。
Eight ounces of nonfat, plain Stonyfield yogurt, mixed with one whole 35-calorie, non-sodium rice cake, mixed with a five-ounce cup of Kashi cereal, mixed with a half an ounce, one of those little boxes, of raisins, mixed with a tablespoon of flaxseed powder--
八盎司脱脂原味 Stonyfield 酸奶，与一整块 35 卡路里的无钠年糕混合，与一杯五盎司的喀什麦片混合，与半盎司（其中一个小盒）葡萄干混合，与一汤匙亚麻籽粉混合——
Vivian is a friend from my past.
薇薇安是我过去的朋友。
I met her when I was 15.
我15岁时认识了她。
She was 36.
她36岁。
And sometimes, I think she saved my life.
有时，我认为她救了我的命。
When she agreed to meet me, I didn't know what to expect.
当她同意见我时，我不知道会发生什么。
I hadn't seen her in 10 years.
我已经有10年没见过她了。
And I didn't know if I'd hug her and just feel bones, or if she'd be strong, the way I remember her.
我不知道我是否会拥抱她并触摸骨头，或者她是否会像我记忆中的那样坚强。
It turns out she's had a hard time.
事实证明，她过得很艰难。
She didn't get better.
她并没有好转。
And she almost died.
而她差点就死了。
When I was going down towards 60, I would crawl out of bed, out of the futon.
当我快六十岁的时候，我会从床上爬起来，从蒲团里爬出来。
I'd be lying there having a panic attack that I was having heart palpitations.
我会躺在那里，惊恐发作，心悸。
And it was, it was hard to breathe.
确实，呼吸困难。
And I got to get some food.
我得去买些食物。
And I thought about the food I'd get.
我想到了我会得到的食物。
And I was alone in the house.
而我一个人在屋子里。
And I would crawl to the kitchen.
我会爬到厨房。
I'm getting dizzy even thinking about now.
我现在想想都觉得头晕。
And I'd crawl up to the fridge, and I'd open it up.
我会爬到冰箱前，打开它。
And I'd be on my knees.
我会跪下。
And I'd take out a spoon.
我会拿出一个勺子。
And I'd open a yogurt.
我会打开酸奶。
And I'd take a spoonful.
我会喝一勺。
And I could feel it go down and really feel it go down my chest, the coolness of it, like it was flip-flopping every rib down and dripping off my ribs into my stomach.
我能感觉到它下降，真的感觉到它下降到我的胸口，它的凉爽，就像它在翻转每根肋骨，从我的肋骨滴到我的胃里。
And suddenly, one heaping teaspoon, and I would got, "Wow, that was just what I needed." And I'd get standing back on my feet, and I'd go, "I'm fine."
突然，一大茶匙，我就会说，“哇，这正是我需要的。”然后我会重新站起来，然后说：“我很好。”
I met Vivian when I was anorectic.
我在厌食症的时候认识了薇薇安。
We shared a room in a hospital where there were other anorectics.
我们在一家医院共用一个房间，那里还有其他厌食症患者。
I'd lost my period then, and my breasts.
那时我已经失去了月经，也失去了胸部。
My bones stuck out, and I wanted to die.
我的骨头突出了，我想死。
Vivian pulled me out of that.
维维安把我从困境中拉了出来。
She convinced me by example to get better.
她以身作则说服我变得更好。
And so I did.
我也这么做了。
But sitting here, looking at her now, I realized that she never planned on getting better.
但现在坐在这里，看着她，我意识到她从未打算好起来。
They had to take out most of my back top teeth because they were deteriorating and there was bone loss.
他们不得不拔掉我的大部分后上牙，因为它们正在恶化并且骨质流失。
It was the malnutrition that did that.
这是营养不良造成的。
So they took them out.
所以他们把它们拿出来了。
And I thought, "This is really great," because now my cheeks would sink in the back, like the models.
我想，“这真是太棒了”，因为现在我的脸颊会像模特一样沉到后面。
You did not.
你没有。
Vivian I did.
维维安 我做到了。
Oh, absolutely.
哦，绝对是。
And then, he said he'd have to make me a removable denture.
然后，他说他必须给我做一个活动假牙。
So I said to him, when you make it, make it so that the back of it slants in, so that my cheekbones-- my face will be as sunken as it can be.
所以我对他说，你做的时候，把它的背面斜进去，这样我的颧骨——我的脸就尽可能凹陷了。
When was this?
这是什么时候的事？
Vivian Well, I've had it maybe for a year and a half.
薇薇安：嗯，我已经这样了大概一年半了。
I don't know.
我不知道。
Or less.
或者更少。
Probably.
大概。
Annie Cheney Vivian's wrist bones could easily fit in a child's fist.
安妮·切尼·维维安的腕骨可以轻松放入孩子的拳头中。
She wears a little T-shirt, and you can see the way her stomach sticks out, hard as bone, as if someone had inflated her like a balloon.
她穿着一件小T恤，你可以看到她的肚子突出来，硬如骨头，就像有人给她充气了，就像一个气球一样。
I still think she's beautiful because I hold on to the way she was when I first met her.
我仍然认为她很漂亮，因为我保持着我第一次见到她时她的样子。
But listening to her talk scares me.
但听她说话让我感到害怕。
It makes me worry that change is impossible, and that we're stuck with who we are.
这让我担心改变是不可能的，而且我们只能坚持自己的身份。
Anorectics are good at PR.
厌食症患者擅长公关。
They can make you believe anything.
他们可以让你相信任何事情。
I should know.
我应该知道。
My whole family's good at Public Relations.
我全家都擅长公共关系。
My father was even a PR man.
我父亲甚至是一名公关人员。
They still issue press releases for my illness.
他们仍然就我的病情发布新闻稿。
My father says, "You made us a better family." My mother says, "It showed how sensitive and artistic you are." My brother says, "It was a testament to your strength that you got better." But I don't know how it turned out, or if it's over, or if any of the things they are true.
我父亲说：“你让我们有了一个更好的家庭。”我妈妈说：“这表明你是多么敏感和有艺术气质。”我哥哥说：“你的进步证明了你的力量。”但我不知道结果如何，也不知道事情是否结束，也不知道这些事情是否属实。
I had half a croissant, toasted, with peach jam, Dad's peach jam that he makes, the non-cook method.
我吃了半个牛角面包，烤的，配上桃子酱，爸爸做的桃子酱，非煮的方法。
That's my mother.
那是我的母亲。
Her recording levels are too hot.
她的录音水平太高了。
She's distorting.
她在歪曲事实。
Well, I buy these calendars for every year, and they show a month at a time on a page.
嗯，我每年都会购买这些日历，它们在页面上一次显示一个月。
And I've saved them back to the '60s.
我把它们带回了 60 年代。
It's very interesting.
这很有趣。
I can see in here when Mrs. Boyle is picking you up from school and who's coming to play, and dentist appointments.
我可以在这里看到博伊尔夫人何时接您放学、谁来玩以及牙医预约。
As a reporter, I was taught to get the hard facts first.
作为一名记者，我被教导要首先了解确凿的事实。
So I start with a written record.
所以我从书面记录开始。
And I see here that all I have on the day that you went in the hospital is that we had a dinner with the Anthonys.
我在这里看到，在你去医院的那天，我所拥有的只是我们与安东尼一家共进晚餐。
And I also had an appointment at your high school, which I gather I didn't keep.
我也在你们高中有个约会，但我想我没有遵守。
But I did put a red star on there, which meant that was the date that you went in the hospital.
但我确实在那儿放了一颗红星，这意味着那是你去医院的日期。
There's no written record after all, just a red star and a calendar full of details.
毕竟没有书面记录，只有一颗红星和一本写满细节的日历。
It's as though that day never happened.
就好像那一天从未发生过。
I think it was sort of a denial.
我认为这有点否认。
I just couldn't believe it.
我简直不敢相信。
Even though it's not on the calendar, it turns out she remembers everything from that day.
尽管日历上没有，但事实证明她记得那天的一切。
Well, it was the middle of January.
嗯，那是一月中旬。
It was bitterly cold.
天气非常寒冷。
I think there was something like an ice storm.
我认为有类似冰暴的东西。
There had been terrible ice.
那里有可怕的冰。
There were no cabs, and we had this very early morning appointment.
没有出租车，我们很早就预约了。
You refused to put on enough clothing to confront that kind of cold.
你拒绝穿足够的衣服来对抗那种寒冷。
And so that was horrible enough as it was.
所以这已经够可怕的了。
And you had no socks, as I recall.
我记得你没穿袜子。
So we had the terrible difficulty that those situations entailed of struggling with you, trying to convince you, and finally deciding we just had to get out of there.
所以我们遇到了可怕的困难，这些情况需要与你斗争，试图说服你，最后决定我们必须离开那里。
And so I think I took some extra things with me, just in case we could persuade you to put them on.
所以我想我带了一些额外的东西，以防万一我们可以说服你穿上它们。
And we went outside.
我们走到外面。
And people were rushing off to offices, and parents were taking their children to school.
人们涌向办公室，家长们带着孩子去学校。
And we couldn't get a cab anywhere.
我们到处都打不到出租车。
So we finally went down to the corner and got on the crosstown bus.
所以我们终于走到街角，上了跨城巴士。
I think all three of us were standing up in the bus, holding on.
我想我们三个人都在公共汽车上站起来，坚持着。
It was very crowded.
那里非常拥挤。
All three of us were standing up, but we were not standing together.
我们三个都站起来了，但我们没有站在一起。
But now that I think about it, it was remarkable that you actually stayed with us.
但现在想来，你居然和我们在一起，真是太了不起了。
In the past, you'd walk away.
过去，你会走开。
You'd leave.
你会离开。
You wouldn't come.
你不会来的。
We got off the bus, and I remember somehow walking those last six blocks.
我们下了车，我记得不知何故步行了最后六个街区。
And it was so bitter.
那是那么的苦涩。
And we tried to cross the street, and it was a sheet of ice.
我们试图过马路，却看到一片冰。
And Dad was slipping, and you were, I think, slipping.
爸爸在滑倒，我想你也在滑倒。
And it was extreme discomfort and despair.
这是极度的不适和绝望。
And of course, the situation was the same way.
当然，情况也是一样。
My mother's story fits my memory of that whole period, me in the middle of my two parents, slipping in my leopard skin high heel shoes.
我母亲的故事符合我对那段时期的记忆，我在我的两个父母中间，穿着我的豹皮高跟鞋。
My mother doesn't mention what got us there, though.
不过，我母亲没有提及是什么让我们到了那里。
In fact, no matter how hard I try to remind her, she won't remember.
事实上，无论我如何努力提醒她，她都不会记得。
Do you remember when I took all those pills?
你还记得我服用所有这些药片的时候吗？
Was that before you went in the hospital?
是去医院之前吗？
Oh yes, I do remember that, but not too clearly.
哦，是的，我记得，但不太清楚。
I remember you were in your room, and you were in your bed.
我记得你在你的房间里，你在你的床上。
And you were-- what had happened?
而你——发生了什么事？
What kind of pills were they that you took?
您服用的是什么药？
They were antihistamines.
它们是抗组胺药。
Annie Cheney's Mother And what was that supposed to do for you?
安妮·切尼的母亲 那对你来说有什么用呢？
Sleep forever.
永远沉睡。
Annie Cheney's Mother Forever?
安妮·切尼永远的母亲？
Oh my god.
我的天啊。
I guess I must have focused on that.
我想我一定是专注于此。
But that's just a terrible memory.
但这只是一段可怕的记忆。
Was that in the fall?
那是在秋天吗？
and what happened?
发生了什么？
Did you vomit them, and then somehow you woke up?
你是不是把它们吐了，然后就醒了？
Or did you not take enough, or what?
还是你拿的不够多，或者什么？
We didn't have to get any emergency service.
我们不需要获得任何紧急服务。
I didn't take enough.
我没拿够。
Annie Cheney's Mother Oh, that was wonderful.
安妮·切尼的母亲哦，那太棒了。
Now, just like then, sometimes the most obvious things go unrecognized.
现在，就像那时一样，有时最明显的事情却被忽视了。
I almost was wishing that this wasn't happening in what I otherwise thought was a really ideal life.
我几乎希望这不会发生在我原本认为非常理想的生活中。
I though, "Ah, everything is so wonderful now.
我想，“啊，现在一切都是那么美好。
It's so much fun, and I'm enjoying everything.
这太有趣了，我很享受一切。
I can't believe this.
我简直不敢相信这一点。
How could this be happening when everything is going so well?"
一切都进展顺利的时候怎么会发生这种事呢？”
Starvation gets people's attention when nothing else will.
当没有其他事情可以引起人们的注意时，饥饿就会引起人们的注意。
Anorectics know that.
厌食症患者知道这一点。
I knew that.
我知道这一点。
I learned it when I was 14.
我14岁时就学会了。
I, at one time, could play all of the movements, which were four movements, I think.
我曾经可以演奏所有的动作，我想大概有四个动作。
And the reason why I played the piece in the first place was that I used to listen to the version that Horowitz played.
我最初演奏这首曲子的原因是我曾经听过霍洛维茨演奏的版本。
When I was sick, I would play it over and over and over again in the living room on my father phonograph.
当我生病的时候，我会在客厅里用父亲的留声机一遍又一遍地播放这首歌。
And I remember sitting in this big chair by the window.
我记得坐在窗边的这张大椅子上。
And I would drink this tea that I always drank when I was sick, because I was freezing all the time.
我会喝我生病时总是喝的茶，因为我一直很冷。
And I would eat a carrot because carrots are the vegetables that are the lowest in calories.
我会吃胡萝卜，因为胡萝卜是热量最低的蔬菜。
And then I would eat the carrot like a corncob because carrots have many layers.
然后我会像吃玉米芯一样吃胡萝卜，因为胡萝卜有很多层。
So you nibble around the outside level, and then you come to another carrot inside.
所以你在外面一层一层地啃，然后你又吃到里面的另一根胡萝卜。
At 5:00 in the morning, when it was still dark, the night nurse would come by to check on us.
早上5:00，天还黑的时候，夜班护士就会过来检查我们的情况。
I can remember the sound of her keys clanging.
我记得她钥匙叮当作响的声音。
She had a face like an owl and short dark hair that was always a little bit greasy.
她有一张猫头鹰般的脸，一头乌黑的短发，总是有点油腻。
At night, she gave out medications and extra Tylenol for anyone who couldn't sleep.
晚上，她为那些无法入睡的人分发药物和额外的泰诺。
We would line up like fluttering, bony birds, hunched over in hospital gowns, waiting patiently for a dose of peace.
我们会像振翅欲飞的瘦骨嶙峋的小鸟一样排成一排，穿着医院的病号服，弯着腰，耐心地等待一剂安宁。
Then it was snack time, a can or two of chocolate Sustacal for the skinniest and least compliant of us.
然后是零食时间，为我们中最瘦、最不听话的人准备一两罐 Sustacal 巧克力。
10:30, to bed.
10点30分，睡觉。
There's nothing worse when you're sick than to have to lie down with a full stomach.
当你生病时，没有什么比吃饱了躺下更糟糕的了。
I can remember shaking my legs under the covers, flexing my feet, tightening every muscle to burn up my snack.
我记得在被子下晃动双腿，弯曲双脚，收紧每一块肌肉来燃烧我的零食。
When I first moved in, I shared a room with a tall, blonde flight attendant.
当我第一次搬进来时，我和一位高大的金发空姐共用一个房间。
She was also a nurse.
她也是一名护士。
Before she moved into the anorectic ward, she took turns at both jobs, a 12-hour shift at the hospital, and then off on a plane somewhere.
在搬进厌食症病房之前，她轮流做两份工作，在医院轮班12小时，然后在某个地方乘飞机离开。
She worked 24 hours a day, she said, just to wear herself out.
她说，她一天24小时工作，就是为了让自己疲惫不堪。
She was the one who taught me how to do aerobics in the closet.
她是教我如何在衣柜里做健美操的人。
We would get up at 5:00 together, turn on our radio just barely enough to hear it, and then we'd jump up and down in our socks.
我们会在 5:00 一起起床，打开收音机，刚好能听到它的声音，然后我们会穿着袜子跳来跳去。
At 7:00, the day nurse arrived and herded us into the bathroom, where we were supposed to get rid of as much as possible before we got weighed.
7:00，日间护士到达并把我们赶进浴室，我们应该在称重之前尽可能地处理掉这些东西。
I remember Vivian standing at the sink, drinking cup after cup of water to throw off the scales and convince the doctor she was eating.
我记得薇薇安站在水槽前，一杯接一杯地喝水，以甩掉体重秤，让医生相信她正在吃东西。
But this was in the beginning, when I still wanted to starve and expected everyone else to want to, too.
但这是在一开始，当时我仍然想挨饿，并希望其他人也想挨饿。
Weigh-in was sometime after the bathroom visit.
称重是在上完厕所后的某个时间。
We'd go down to the room that had a scale and line up outside, one person at a time only.
我们会走到有体重秤的房间，在外面排队，一次只能一个人。
I'd stand with my back to the scale because I didn't want to watch the numbers.
我会背对着体重秤站着，因为我不想看数字。
Afterwards, I'd ask how much.
后来我就问多少钱。
There was always some commotion at weigh-in.
称重时总会有一些骚动。
Someone would start wailing or shaking or screaming.
有人会开始哭泣、颤抖或尖叫。
They didn't want to get on the scale.
他们不想上秤。
They didn't want to eat.
他们不想吃饭。
Go to hell.
去地狱吧。
There we all were, in a frenzy about our bodies and about facing the truth of the scale.
我们都在那里，对我们的身体和面对体重秤的真相感到疯狂。
Women with children and husbands, young girls and 20-somethings who looked, at times, 80, and at times, like infants.
有孩子和丈夫的妇女、年轻女孩和 20 多岁的人，有时看起来像 80 岁，有时看起来像婴儿。
And then, it was time for breakfast.
然后，就到了吃早餐的时间了。
Well, I had a blueberry muffin, fresh mint tea, fresh raspberries, fresh black raspberries, and a half a bagel and strawberry jam.
嗯，我吃了一个蓝莓松饼、新鲜薄荷茶、新鲜覆盆子、新鲜黑覆盆子、半个百吉饼和草莓酱。
That's my father in a lounge chair in his favorite spot.
那是我父亲坐在他最喜欢的地方的躺椅上。
We're in historic Columbia County, in the back yard of our home, in what we call "the oasis," looking out over the pool, with a huge tree over our head, rock wall around, and tables and chairs here, so we could eat out here if we ever want to.
我们在历史悠久的哥伦比亚县，在我们家的后院，在我们称之为“绿洲”的地方，俯瞰着游泳池，头顶上有一棵大树，周围是岩墙，这里有桌椅，所以如果我们想的话，我们可以在这里吃饭。
The thing you have to understand about my father is that he grew up poor, and then he got rich.
关于我父亲，你必须了解的一点是，他出身贫穷，后来变得富有。
There are times he remembers when he didn't have enough to eat.
有时他记得自己没有足够的食物。
Sometimes, he even stole food for his dinner.
有时，他甚至偷食物当晚饭。
Now, he's known for his brilliant gourmet cooking.
现在，他以其出色的美食烹饪而闻名。
The thing that, of course, absolutely destroyed me, came close to destroying me, was when you suddenly decided you weren't going to eat.
当然，彻底摧毁我、几乎摧毁我的事情是当你突然决定不吃东西的时候。
And I couldn't believe that I'd worked all that time and tried to provide food and undergone a lot of humiliation in work, where somebody's your boss, and you have things you don't like about it, and everything else.
我不敢相信我一直在工作，试图提供食物，并在工作中经历了很多羞辱，有人是你的老板，你有你不喜欢的事情，以及其他一切。
You work to bring home money to help everybody have a good living and eat.
你工作是为了赚回家钱，帮助每个人过上好的生活和吃饭。
When somebody decides not to eat, that really does throw it back in your face.
当有人决定不吃东西时，这确实会让你感到气愤。
What the hell have I've been living for?
我到底是为了什么而活着？
I've been trying to help this family and self-sacrificing and a lot of other stuff.
我一直在努力帮助这个家庭并做出自我牺牲和许多其他事情。
And all of the sudden, somebody's trying to kill themselves by not eating.
突然之间，有人试图通过不吃东西来自杀。
And you ask yourself, did I have anything to do with this?
你问自己，我与这件事有什么关系吗？
Anorexia is embarrassing.
厌食症是令人尴尬的。
It embarrassed my father, humiliated him.
这让我父亲感到尴尬、羞辱。
The thing that still strikes me in my memory, the height of the defiance, was we had gone out to dinner at some restaurant along Columbus.
在我的记忆中，最强烈的反抗是我们去哥伦布沿线的一家餐馆吃晚饭。
And you got angry at dinner, for a reason I didn't fully understand, because you wouldn't eat, and I was trying to get you to eat, because I thought, this girl, if she keeps this up, she's going to starve to death.
你在晚餐时生气了，原因我不完全理解，因为你不吃东西，而我试图让你吃东西，因为我想，这个女孩，如果她继续这样，她会饿死的。
I suppose she'd also disgrace me by starving herself to death.
我想她也会饿死自己来羞辱我。
And then what?
然后呢？
Everyone would just think--
大家都会想——
Well, no. Everybody would say something was wrong in that household.
嗯，不。每个人都会说那个家庭出了问题。
The parents had something wrong with them, because their child starved herself to death.
父母有问题，因为他们的孩子饿死了。
And it must have been terrible, that she'd want to starve herself to death to get out of that family.
她想要饿死自己才能离开那个家庭，这一定很可怕。
So anyway, and I felt like I had an obligation to get you to eat.
所以无论如何，我觉得我有义务让你吃饭。
You're supposed to keep your children alive.
你应该让你的孩子活下去。
So I followed you down the block there, behind the museum.
所以我跟着你沿着街区走到博物馆后面。
And I was saying, "Come back.
我说：“回来吧。
Come back.
回来吧。
You have to eat." And you bit me in the arm.
你必须吃饭。”然后你咬了我的手臂。
I was trying to take a-- And then this man ran up to you and me.
我正试图采取——然后这个人跑向你和我。
And he turned to you, and he said, "What's going on here?
他转向你，说道：“这是怎么回事？
Are you all right?" he said to you.
你还好吗？”他对你说。
I could see he thought I was an abusive parent.
我看得出来他认为我是一个施虐的父母。
And he was asking you if he should do anything.
他问你他是否应该做点什么。
It was totally humiliating to have a total stranger say, "Should I be helping you," meaning you, not me, "take this brute away," beating him up or getting him out of here so you won't be abused by this guy.
让一个完全陌生的人说“我应该帮助你吗”，意思是你，而不是我，“把这个畜生带走”，殴打他或把他带出这里，这样你就不会被这个家伙虐待，这是完全耻辱的。
I'll tell you, that was very humiliating.
我告诉你，那是非常丢脸的事情。
What I wanted by whittling myself down to the core was to get my father to see me more clearly, to realize that I was separate from him, and that he should love me anyway, maybe even because we were different.
我想要通过把自己削减到核心，是为了让我的父亲更清楚地看到我，意识到我和他是分开的，而且他无论如何都应该爱我，甚至可能因为我们不同。
That's what I wanted then, although I never told him.
这就是我当时想要的，尽管我从未告诉过他。
Today, I had scrambled eggs, toast, raspberries, orange juice, and coffee.
今天，我吃了炒鸡蛋、吐司、覆盆子、橙汁和咖啡。
When I got sick, my older brother was away at college.
当我生病时，我哥哥正在上大学。
Even though he wasn't around that much, he knew something was wrong with me, even before I started to lose weight.
尽管他不在我身边，但在我开始减肥之前，他就知道我出了问题。
And it bothered him because of what it meant about me and what it could mean for him, and because it wasn't supposed to happen.
这让他很困扰，因为这对我意味着什么，对他也意味着什么，而且因为这是不应该发生的。
It was a little strange because you don't really understand why it just pops up, like a mushroom on your lawn one day.
这有点奇怪，因为你真的不明白为什么它会突然出现，就像有一天你的草坪上出现蘑菇一样。
Suddenly, it's there.
突然，它就在那里。
And you're like, "Oh.
你会说，“哦。
What is this?" But I just didn't understand how we could be so closely related and have such different interpretations of things and experiences of things.
这是什么？”但我就是不明白我们怎么会如此紧密地联系在一起，并对事物和事物的经历有如此不同的解释。
Well, I think I didn't want to think that things weren't fine.
嗯，我想我不想认为事情不好。
What do you mean?
你是什么意思？
Annie Cheney's Brother Well, I think there was always an emphasis on being perfect in the family.
安妮·切尼的兄弟嗯，我认为家庭总是强调完美。
Everything had to be perfect.
一切都必须完美。
I liked that idea.
我喜欢这个主意。
I still feel that way in many ways.
我在很多方面仍然有这种感觉。
I get upset when there's evidence to the contrary that I'm perfect, which is often.
当有相反的证据表明我很完美时，我会感到不安，这种情况经常发生。
I don't like to admit that.
我不愿意承认这一点。
Maybe you provided evidence that things might not be perfect by the way you were acting.
也许你提供的证据表明，你的行为方式可能并不完美。
And I was very upset that you were shattering the glass on this nice window, you know?
你打碎了这扇漂亮窗户上的玻璃，我感到非常沮丧，你知道吗？
One way our family was perfect, I mean really perfect, was at the breakfast table.
我们家庭完美的一种方式，我的意思是真正完美的方式，就是在早餐桌上。
In our family, there's a lot of dishes.
我们家有很多菜。
And there's a lot of dishes for different types of courses, and cutlery and silverware.
还有很多适合不同类型菜肴的菜肴以及餐具和银器。
Our table, sometimes I'd look, and there'd be so many plates on the table, you could barely see the table, even for a simple breakfast.
我们的桌子，有时我会看一下，桌子上有很多盘子，你几乎看不到桌子，即使是简单的早餐。
So no meal was simple.
所以没有一顿饭是简单的。
Everything was very elaborate and formalized and ceremonial, and had a lot of different-- it was very complicated.
一切都非常复杂、正式和仪式化，而且有很多不同之处——非常复杂。
You could never have a simple breakfast.
你永远不可能吃一顿简单的早餐。
A lot of people like to cut corners and not have a full breakfast.
很多人喜欢走捷径，不吃丰盛的早餐。
But I've always felt it was nice.
但我一直觉得这样很好。
It was a pleasant experience.
这是一次愉快的经历。
And it's one that stays with one.
而且它是一个与一个人在一起的人。
Four glass plates.
四块玻璃板。
What are those for?
那些是做什么用的？
Annie Cheney's Mother Well, that goes under the fruit, or whatever else somebody might have, poached eggs, or it depends.
安妮·切尼的母亲 好吧，那是在水果下面，或者其他人可能有的东西，荷包蛋，或者这取决于情况。
I suppose the whole basis of it is that I just like it to look nice.
我想它的全部基础是我只是喜欢它看起来漂亮。
And I think gives you a lift, even if you're just passing through, and you're called to breakfast.
我认为它可以让你搭便车，即使你只是路过，并且你被叫去吃早餐。
And you sit down, and ugh, you think.
然后你坐下来，呃，你想。
Oh god, another day.
天啊，又是一天。
But somehow, it registers.
但不知何故，它注册了。
Or at least, it registers with me.
或者至少，它在我身上留下了痕迹。
If I have a nice breakfast, and I'm not feeling just great, it helps to improve my mood.
如果我吃一顿丰盛的早餐，而且我感觉不太好，这有助于改善我的情绪。
So I think it's a nice thing to do.
所以我认为这是一件好事。
And I don't like the plates just thrown on the table.
而且我不喜欢直接扔在桌子上的盘子。
I like them to look organized and neat and thoughtfully placed.
我喜欢它们看起来井井有条、整洁且摆放得经过深思熟虑。
So sometimes people help me, and they just scatter it on the table.
所以有时人们帮助我，他们只是把它撒在桌子上。
Would you like some raspberries?
您想要一些覆盆子吗？
We ate in the day room, which was always full of stale smoke from the night before.
我们在休息室吃饭，那里总是充满了前一天晚上的臭味。
Someone from the kitchen would come up with a contraption on wheels full of trays, each one with a name on it.
厨房里的人会想出一个带轮子的装置，里面装满了托盘，每个托盘上都有一个名字。
We'd take our places.
我们各就各位。
Everyone had a special table.
每个人都有一张特殊的桌子。
One woman had her own, where no one else could sit.
一位女士有自己的座位，没有其他人可以坐。
No one could touch her tray, either, or talk to her during meals.
没有人可以碰她的托盘，也没有人可以在吃饭时与她说话。
Our trays came laden with various pre-measured parcels, Melba toast in packets of four, plastic containers of raisins and peanut butter, all things that we had gone over with the nutritionist the day before.
我们的托盘里装满了各种预先量好的包裹，四块一包的梅尔巴吐司，装葡萄干和花生酱的塑料容器，所有这些都是我们前一天与营养师一起检查过的。
I remember sitting in her office in the afternoon.
我记得下午坐在她的办公室里。
She'd take out a calculator and the next day's menu and say, "What do you want to eat tomorrow?" "I don't know.
她会拿出计算器和第二天的菜单，然后说：“明天想吃什么？” “我不知道。
I don't want to eat tomorrow."
我明天不想吃饭。”
Every day, there was a schedule, mostly meals interspersed with activities like dance therapy and art therapy, with some snacks in between.
每天都有一个时间表，主要是吃饭，中间穿插着舞蹈治疗和艺术治疗等活动，中间还有一些小吃。
At night, after dinner, we'd sit around in a circle next to the television, holding hands and listening to music.
晚上，晚饭后，我们会在电视机旁边围坐一圈，手拉手听音乐。
A few of us would cry.
我们几个人会哭。
Some people would smoke cigarettes.
有些人会抽烟。
And then we'd go to bed.
然后我们就去睡觉了。
It went on like that for a while, until one morning, the doctor said he'd put me on the tube if I didn't start eating.
这样持续了一段时间，直到有一天早上，医生说如果我不开始吃东西，他就会给我插管。
I remember leaving his office and turning down the hall and seeing some girls there, who were taking turns walking up and down, judging each other's thighs.
我记得离开他的办公室，拐进大厅，看到那里有一些女孩，她们轮流走来走去，互相打量对方的大腿。
Each one said hers were bigger, but none of them were.
每个人都说她的更大，但没有一个更大。
And it dawned on me then that if I kept going, I might never come back.
然后我突然意识到，如果我继续走下去，我可能永远不会回来。
And so at lunch that day, I asked the girl next to me if she'd dare me to finish what was on my plate.
所以那天午餐时，我问旁边的女孩是否敢让我吃完盘子里的东西。
She did.
她做到了。
And from that day on, I ate.
从那天起，我就吃饭了。
And they finally let me out on April Fool's Day, 1988.
他们终于在 1988 年愚人节那天放了我。
I think I had some flowers in your room, where I'd put your favorite sheets on the bed.
我想我在你的房间里放了一些花，我会把你最喜欢的床单放在床上。
And you seemed pleased by that.
你似乎对此很高兴。
But I very quickly realized how fragile you were.
但我很快就意识到你是多么脆弱。
But the helpful thing was that while you were fragile, you also seemed so appreciative of my help.
但有用的是，虽然你很脆弱，但你似乎也很感激我的帮助。
And there were times when it was so overwhelming that you would just collapse in sobs on your bed.
有时，这种感觉是如此难以承受，以至于你会倒在床上抽泣。
And I remember the nice thing was that I actually felt that I could be helpful to you.
我记得一件好事是我确实觉得我可以对你有所帮助。
And so sometimes I'd just sit and talk to you.
所以有时我只是坐下来和你说话。
And afterwards, you'd say, "Well, you know, I really appreciate your support." And so that made me feel much better because it was so different than it had been six months before, when it was impossible to reach you.
之后，你会说：“嗯，你知道，我真的很感谢你的支持。”这让我感觉好多了，因为这与六个月前完全不同，当时我无法联系到你。
Well anyway, that was a wonderful turning point.
无论如何，那是一个美妙的转折点。
When I came home, I ate my breakfast somewhere else until eventually, it got easier, and I started to sit at the table across from my brother again.
当我回到家时，我在其他地方吃早餐，直到最后，一切变得更容易，我又开始坐在我哥哥对面的桌子旁。
There were still a lot of plates.
盘子还是很多的。
And we didn't talk about what had happened.
我们没有谈论发生的事情。
In fact, we haven't really talked about it until now, 10 years later.
事实上，直到十年后的今天，我们才真正谈论过这个问题。
Oh, why didn't I keep some kind of journal about this?
哦，我为什么不写一些关于这件事的日记呢？
This was just astounding.
这实在是太令人震惊了。
Because after a while, your memory's so selective, you don't remember the worst things.
因为过了一段时间，你的记忆就会变得非常有选择性，你不会记得最糟糕的事情。
To tell you the truth, I'm pretty hard on my parents and the part they played in my illness.
说实话，我对我的父母以及他们在我的病中所扮演的角色非常严厉。
But looking back on those times, I also think about my mother and how she kept trying, no matter how often I retreated into my body and refused her help.
但回想起那些时光，我也会想起我的母亲，以及她如何不断地努力，无论我多少次退回到自己的身体里并拒绝她的帮助。
She sat with me and waited until I was ready to face up to my feelings, I mean, any feelings.
她坐在我身边，等到我准备好面对我的感受，我的意思是，任何感受。
[MUSIC PLAYING - ANNIE CHENEY PLAYING A SCHUMANN PIANO PIECE]
[音乐播放 - 安妮·切尼演奏舒曼钢琴曲]
I'll try it again.
我会再试一次。
The same area where I made the mistakes before, I can't remember how to get out of the mistakes.
我以前犯过错误的地方，我不记得如何摆脱错误。
I mean there's a certain chord, and then if I play that chord, then I can get out of the mistake I'm going to make.
我的意思是有一个特定的和弦，然后如果我弹奏那个和弦，那么我就可以摆脱我将要犯的错误。
But I can never remember which chord it is.
但我总是记不起那是哪个和弦。
[MUSIC PLAYING - ANNIE CHENEY PLAYING A SCHUMANN PIANO PIECE]
[音乐播放 - 安妮·切尼演奏舒曼钢琴曲]
I still don't know if I'm completely better.
我仍然不知道我是否已经完全好转。
There are times even now when I prefer hard bones over softness and sorrow, when I don't want to know the truth.
即使是现在，有时我也宁愿选择坚硬的骨头而不是柔软和悲伤，当我不想知道真相时。
For instance, I never asked my brother if I could interview him for this story.
例如，我从未问过我的兄弟是否可以采访他来报道这个故事。
I thought he might embarrass me or tell me something I didn't want to hear.
我以为他可能会让我难堪，或者告诉我一些我不想听的事情。
It was my mother who told me later that he felt left out and that I should talk to him.
后来我母亲告诉我，他觉得自己被冷落了，我应该和他谈谈。
Yeah, I think that just played into a lot of the feelings I had at the time, when I was like, "Well, why haven't I been asked?" I'm not going to go over and ask you, "Why haven't you interviewed me?" Because I had assumed there was--
是的，我认为这影响了我当时的很多感受，当时我想，“好吧，为什么没有人问我？”我不会走过去问你：“你为什么不采访我？”因为我以为有——
Well, why not?
嗯，为什么不呢？
Annie Cheney's Brother Well, because I don't feel it's my place to come and like, "Oh, can I please be interviewed?" Because I feel like if you have to ask, it would be very demeaning.
安妮·切尼的兄弟好吧，因为我觉得这不是我该来的地方，比如“哦，我可以接受采访吗？”因为我觉得如果你非要问的话，那就太丢脸了。
It felt demeaning to me.
这对我来说是一种侮辱。
And I feel like you should have, as a reporter, looked for all the sides of the story.
我觉得作为一名记者，你应该寻找故事的各个方面。
You want some selective version of what happened.
你想要一些所发生的事情的选择性版本。
And you were afraid I was going to bring up something--
你担心我会提出一些事情——
I have to admit, I did want my brother to come to me.
我必须承认，我确实希望我的兄弟来找我。
You're not doing your job as a reporter.
你没有尽到记者的职责。
In some ways, anorexia was about having other people come to me.
在某些方面，厌食症就是让其他人来找我。
--avoiding the landmines and just sticking--
--避开地雷并坚持下去--
I wanted relationships on my terms.
我想要按照我的方式建立关系。
My father's like that, too.
我父亲也是这样的。
When I was still in the hospital, and I was starting to get better, I called him up and asked him if he'd take me to the movies.
当我还在医院里，情况开始好转时，我打电话给他，问他是否愿意带我去看电影。
He said he'd take me if I gained half a pound.
他说如果我体重增加半磅他就带我去。
And so we didn't go.
所以我们就没有去。
We were trying to coerce each other and defy each other.
我们试图互相胁迫，互相反抗。
We were locked in some kind of a grip of anger and defiance.
我们被某种愤怒和反抗所束缚。
It was as if one of the Greek gods had decided to punish us for hubris.
就好像希腊诸神之一决定惩罚我们的狂妄自大。
Where'd that come from?
那是从哪里来的？
Annie Cheney's Father The hubris came from our presumably thinking we were doing all the right things, going to a private school, being able to afford what we were able to afford, and buying things and having a materially successful life and whatever set of-- having some kind of reverence for each other.
安妮·切尼的父亲 这种狂妄自大来自于我们可能认为我们正在做所有正确的事情，上私立学校，能够负担得起我们能负担得起的费用，购买东西并拥有物质上成功的生活以及诸如此类的东西 - 对彼此有某种尊重。
What did I tell you?
我告诉你什么了？
Sometimes I think the only thing that makes a difference is the passage of time.
有时我想，唯一能改变的就是时间的流逝。
You make all kinds of mistakes.
你会犯各种各样的错误。
But time passes, and then somehow, things get cured a little bit.
但时间流逝，不知怎么地，事情就得到了一点缓解。
And life goes on in a new way.
生活以新的方式继续。
Yup.
是的。
Well, I'll take you to the movies sometime.
好吧，有时间我带你去看电影。
I had anxiety laden with a very thin coating of agitation.
我的焦虑中夹杂着一层薄薄的焦躁。
And it was coupled with a cup of very lukewarm pseudo-comfort, in the form of an anti-depressant.
它还配上一杯非常不冷不热的伪安慰，以抗抑郁药的形式。
After I finished interviewing my parents, I went back to talk to Vivian again.
采访完父母后，我又回去和薇薇安聊了聊。
And I asked her how she felt, and if she thought she'd ever get better.
我问她感觉如何，是否认为自己会好起来。
She said she realized, finally, what she'd done, and how her body would never be the same again.
她说她终于意识到自己做了什么，也意识到她的身体再也不会像以前一样了。
I realized I've lost all my back teeth due to my illness.
我意识到由于我的病我已经失去了所有的后牙。
I'm getting old.
我变老了。
I've hurt myself.
我伤害了自己。
I'm falling apart.
我崩溃了。
And I started crying.
我开始哭泣。
I desperately want to lose weight.
我非常想减肥。
I am desperate to lose weight.
我迫切地想减肥。
I could tell you she's going to find a way out, and I could tell you she's never going to change, and both things would be true.
我可以告诉你她会找到出路，我可以告诉你她永远不会改变，这两件事都是真的。
And she'd tell you the same thing.
她也会告诉你同样的事情。
As for me, I've started going out with my microphone looking for stories that I want to tell.
至于我，我已经开始带着麦克风出去寻找我想讲的故事。
I talked to one woman named Louise who started making hats out of carpet scraps when she was diagnosed with skin cancer.
我采访了一位名叫路易丝的女士，她在被诊断出患有皮肤癌后开始用地毯废料制作帽子。
And they really do a good job.
他们确实做得很好。
They healed my cancer.
他们治愈了我的癌症。
She told me she's really excited about the rest of her life because she finally feels like she can be herself.
她告诉我她对自己的余生感到非常兴奋，因为她终于觉得自己可以做自己了。
Mm-hmm.
嗯嗯。
And someday, I'll die, whether I want to or not.
有一天，无论我愿意与否，我都会死。
She played the piano for me, a song she learned when she was 12 and still remembers.
她为我弹钢琴，这是她 12 岁时学过的一首歌，至今仍记忆犹新。
Here's the Chopin prelude.
这是肖邦的前奏曲。
[MUSIC PLAYING - A CHOPIN PRELUDE PLAYED BY LOUISE]
[音乐演奏——路易丝演奏的肖邦前奏曲]
I went out and got the sheet music for the Schumann piece.
我出去拿了舒曼作品的乐谱。
[MUSIC PLAYING - ANNIE CHENEY PLAYING A SCHUMANN PIANO PIECE]
[音乐播放 - 安妮·切尼演奏舒曼钢琴曲]
I've even played it and gotten past that chord.
我什至弹过它并超越了那个和弦。
[MUSIC PLAYING - ANNIE CHENEY PLAYING A SCHUMANN PIANO PIECE]
[音乐播放 - 安妮·切尼演奏舒曼钢琴曲]
Ira Glass Annie Cheney's story was produced by Jay Allison as part of his Life Stories series, with help from Tina Egloff and funding from the Corporation for Public Broadcasting.
艾拉·格拉斯 (Ira Glass) 安妮·切尼 (Annie Cheney) 的故事由杰·艾利森 (Jay Allison) 在蒂娜·埃格洛夫 (Tina Egloff) 的帮助和公共广播公司的资助下制作，作为他的生活故事系列的一部分。
Coming up, Lord of the Flies enacted with tacos, baby carrots, and a gallon of 1% milk.
即将上映的《蝇王》将由玉米饼、小胡萝卜和一加仑 1% 牛奶组成。
That's in a minute from Public Radio International when our program continues.
一分钟后，国际公共广播电台将继续我们的节目。
It's This American Life.
这就是美国生活。
I'm Ira Glass.
我是艾拉·格拉斯。
Each week on our program, of course, we choose a theme, bring you a variety of stories on that theme.
当然，我们每周的节目都会选择一个主题，为您带来有关该主题的各种故事。
Today's program, You Gonna Eat That?
今天的节目，你要吃那个吗？
Three stories of three families at three meals.
三个家庭三顿饭的三个故事。
Act One was about breakfast.
第一幕是关于早餐的。
We have arrived at Act Two, Lunch.
我们已经到了第二幕，午餐。
In this act, we hear things strictly from the parent's point of view.
在这个行为中，我们严格从父母的角度来听事情。
We have this story from Ian Frazier, "Laws Concerning Food and Drink; Household Principles; Lamentations of the Father."
我们有伊恩·弗雷泽 (Ian Frazier) 的故事，“有关饮食的法律；家庭原则；父亲的哀歌”。
Of the beasts of the field and of the fishes of the sea and of all foods that are acceptable in my sight, you may eat, but not in the living room.
田野的走兽、海里的鱼，以及一切我看为可喜悦的食物，你们都可以吃，但不可在客厅里吃。
Of the hoofed animals, broiled and ground into burgers, you may eat, but not in the living room.
有蹄类的动物，烤熟后磨成汉堡，你可以吃，但不能在客厅吃。
Of the cloven-hoofed animal, plain or with cheese, you may eat, but not in the living room.
偶蹄动物，无论是原味的还是加奶酪的，你都可以吃，但不能在客厅里吃。
Of the cereal grains, of the corn and of the wheat and of the oats, and of all the cereals that are of bright color and unknown provenance, you may eat, but not in the living room.
谷物、玉米、小麦、燕麦，以及所有颜色鲜艳、来源不明的谷物，你可以吃，但不能在客厅里吃。
Of the quiescently frozen dessert, and of all frozen after-meal treats, you make eat, but absolutely not in the living room.
静态冷冻的甜点以及所有冷冻的餐后零食都是你自己做的，但绝对不是在客厅里。
Of the juices and other beverages, yes, even of those in sippy cups, you may drink, but not in the living room.
果汁和其他饮料，是的，即使是那些装在吸管杯里的饮料，你也可以喝，但不能在客厅里喝。
Neither may you carry such therein.
您也不可以携带此类物品。
Indeed, when you reach the place where the living room carpet begins, of any food or beverage, there you may not eat.
确实，当你到达客厅地毯开始的地方时，任何食物或饮料，在那里你都不能吃。
Neither may you drink.
也不可以喝酒。
But if you are sick and are lying down and watching something, then you may eat in the living room.
但如果您生病了并且正在躺着看东西，那么您可以在客厅吃饭。
And if you are seated in your high chair, or in a chair such as a greater person might use, keep your legs and feet below you, as they were.
如果您坐在高脚椅上，或者坐在大人可能使用的椅子上，请将腿和脚保持在您下方，就像以前一样。
Neither raise up your knees, nor place your feet upon the table, for that is an abomination to me.
不要抬起膝盖，也不要把脚放在桌子上，因为那是我所厌恶的。
Yes, even when you have an interesting bandage to show, your feet upon the table are an abomination, and worthy of rebuke.
是的，即使你有有趣的绷带可以展示，你的脚放在桌子上也是令人厌恶的，值得谴责。
Drink your milk as it is given to you.
喝给你的牛奶。
Neither use on it any utensils, nor fork, nor knife, nor spoon, for that is not what they are for.
请勿在上面使用任何器具、叉子、刀子或勺子，因为这不是它们的用途。
If you will dip your blocks in the milk and lick it off, you will be sent away.
如果你将你的方块浸入牛奶中并把它舔掉，你就会被送走。
When you have drunk, let the empty cup then remain upon the table and do not by bite it upon its edge and by your teeth, hold it to your face in order to make noises in it, sounding like a duck, for you will be sent away.
喝完后，把空杯子放在桌子上，不要用牙齿咬住杯子的边缘，也不要把杯子举到脸上发出声音，像鸭子一样，因为你会被送走。
When you chew your food, keep your mouth closed until you have swallowed and do not open it to show your brother or your sister what is within.
当您咀嚼食物时，请闭上嘴直至吞咽，并且不要张开嘴让您的兄弟或姐妹看到里面有什么。
I say to you, do not so, even if your brother or your sister has done the same to you.
我告诉你，即使你的兄弟或姐妹对你做了同样的事，也不要这样做。
Eat your food only.
只吃你的食物。
Do not eat that which is not food.
不要吃不是食物的东西。
Neither seize the table between your jaws, nor use the raiment or the table to wipe your lips.
不要用下巴夹住桌子，也不要用衣服或桌子擦嘴唇。
I say again to you, do not touch it, but leave it as it is.
我再说一遍，不要碰它，就让它保持原样。
And though your stick of carrot does indeed resemble a marker, draw not with it upon the table, even in pretend, for we do not do that, that is why.
尽管你的胡萝卜棒确实像一支记号笔，但不要用它在桌子上画画，即使是假装的，因为我们不这样做，这就是原因。
And though the pieces of broccoli are very like small trees, do not stand them upright to make a forest, because we do not do that, that is why.
尽管西兰花片很像小树，但不要将它们直立起来形成森林，因为我们不这样做，这就是原因。
Sit just as I have told you and do not lean to one side or the other, nor slide down until you are nearly slid away.
就像我告诉你的那样坐着，不要向一侧或另一侧倾斜，也不要向下滑动，直到你快要滑走为止。
Heed me, for if you sit like that, your hair will go into the syrup.
听我说，如果你这样坐着，你的头发就会进入糖浆里。
And now behold, even as I have said, it has come to pass.
现在看，正如我所说，它已经实现了。
For we judge between the plate that is unclean and the plate that is clean, saying first, if the plate is clean, than you shall have dessert.
因为我们在不干净的盘子和干净的盘子之间进行判断，首先说，如果盘子是干净的，那么你应该吃甜点。
But of the unclean plate, the laws are these.
但对于不干净的盘子来说，规律就是这些。
If you have eaten most of your meat and two bites of your peas, with each bite consisting of not less than three peas each, or in total, six peas, eaten where I can see, and you have also eaten enough of your potatoes to fill two forks, both forkfuls eaten where I can see, then you shall have dessert.
如果你已经吃掉了大部分的肉和两口豌豆，每口至少含三颗豌豆，或者总共六颗豌豆，在我能看到的地方吃掉，并且你还吃了足够的土豆来装满两叉子，两叉子都在我能看到的地方吃掉，那么你就可以吃甜点了。
But if you eat a lesser number of peas and yet you eat the potatoes, still, you shall not have dessert.
但如果你吃的豌豆数量较少，而你却吃土豆，你仍然不会吃甜点。
And if you eat the peas, yet leave the potatoes uneaten, you shall not have dessert, no, not even a small portion thereof.
如果你吃了豌豆，但不吃土豆，你就不能吃甜点，不，哪怕是一小部分。
And if you try to deceive by moving the potatoes or peas around with a fork, that it may appear you have eaten what you have not, you will fall into iniquity.
如果你试图用叉子移动土豆或豌豆来欺骗别人，让别人以为你已经吃了你没有吃过的东西，你就会陷入罪孽之中。
And I will know.
我会知道的。
And you shall have no dessert.
而且你不可以吃甜点。
Do not scream, for it is as if you scream all the time.
不要尖叫，因为就好像你一直在尖叫。
If you are given a plate on which two foods you do not wish to touch each other are touching each other, your voice rises up even to the ceiling, while you point to the offense with the finger of your right hand.
如果给你一个盘子，上面有两种你不想碰的食物正在相互接触，你的声音甚至会上升到天花板，同时你用右手的手指指出冒犯的地方。
But I say to you, scream not.
但我告诉你，不要尖叫。
Only remonstrate gently with the server that the server may correct the fault.
仅温和地向服务器提出警告，服务器可以纠正错误。
Likewise, if you receive a portion of fish from which every piece of herbal seasoning has not been scraped off, and the herbal seasoning is loathsome to you and steeped in vileness, again I say, refrain from screaming.
同样的，如果你收到一份鱼，里面的药草调味料都没有被刮掉，而药草调味料对你来说是令人厌恶的，并且充满了污秽，我再说一遍，不要尖叫。
Though the vileness overwhelm you and cause you a faint unto death, make not that sound from within your throat.
尽管邪恶压倒了你，让你昏厥至死，但不要从喉咙里发出那种声音。
Neither cover your face nor press your fingers to your nose, for even now, I have made the fish as it should be.
不要遮住脸，也不要把手指压在鼻子上，因为即使是现在，我也已经把鱼做好了。
Behold, I eat of it myself, yet do not die.
看哪，我自己吃了它，却没有死。
Cast your countenance upward to the light and lift your eyes to the hills, that I may more easily wash you off.
把你的脸仰向光明，抬起你的眼睛看向山丘，这样我就可以更容易地把你洗掉。
For the stains are upon you, even to the very back of your head there is rice thereon.
因为你身上有污渍，连后脑勺都有米。
And in your breast pocket of your garment, and upon the tie of your shoe, rice and other fragments are distributed in a manner wonderful to see.
在你衣服胸前的口袋里和鞋带上，大米和其他碎片以一种看起来很美妙的方式分布着。
Only hold yourself still, hold still, I say.
只要保持不动，保持不动，我说。
Give each finger in its turn for my examination thereof, and also each thumb.
依次给出每个手指，以及每个拇指，供我检查。
Lo, how iniquitous they appear.
瞧，他们看起来多么邪恶啊。
What I do is as it must be, and you shall not go hence until I have done.
我所做的事情是必然的，在我完成之前你不能离开。
Bite not, lest you be cast into quiet time.
不要咬，以免你陷入安静的时光。
Neither drink of your own bath water, nor of bath water of any kind, nor rub your feet on bread, even if it be in the package, nor rub yourself against cars, nor against any building, nor eat sand.
不要喝自己的洗澡水，也不要喝任何种类的洗澡水，不要用面包擦脚，即使是在包装中，也不要在汽车或任何建筑物上摩擦自己，也不要吃沙子。
Leave the cat alone, for what has the cat done that you should so afflict it with tape?
别管猫了，猫到底做了什么，你要用胶带来折磨它？
And hum not that humming in your nose as I read, nor stand between the light and the book.
当我读书时，不要在鼻子里嗡嗡作响，也不要站在灯光和书本之间。
Indeed, you will drive me to madness.
确实，你会让我发疯的。
Nor forget what I said about the tape.
也不要忘记我所说的关于磁带的事情。
O my children, you are disobedient.
我的孩子们啊，你们不听话。
For when I tell you what you must do, you argue and dispute hotly, even to the littlest detail.
因为当我告诉你必须做什么时，你会激烈争论，甚至是最微小的细节。
And when I do not accede, you cry out and hit and kick.
当我不同意时，你就大喊大叫，拳打脚踢。
Yes, and even sometimes do you spit and shout "stupid-head" and other blasphemies, and hit and kick the wall in the molding thereof when you are sent to the corner.
是的，甚至有时候，当你被送到角落时，你会吐口水，大喊“愚蠢的头”和其他亵渎的话，并在其造型中击打和踢墙。
And though the law teaches that no one shall be sent to the corner for more minutes than he has years of age, yet I would leave you there all day, so mighty am I in anger.
尽管法律规定，任何人不得被送入角落多于其年龄，但我会把你留在那里一整天，我的愤怒是如此强大。
But upon being sent to the corner, you ask straight away, "Can I come out?" And I reply, "No, you may not come out." And again you ask, and again I give the same reply.
但当你被送到角落时，你立刻问道：“我可以出来吗？”我回答说：“不，你不能出来。”你又问，我又给出同样的答复。
But when you ask again a third time, then you may come out.
但当你第三次再问的时候，你就可能出来了。
Hear me, O my children, for the bills, they kill me.
听我说，我的孩子们，为了账单，他们杀了我。
I pay and pay again, even to the 12th time in a year, and yet again, they mount higher than before.
我一次又一次地付钱，甚至一年内第12次，但它们再次比以前更高。
For our health, that we may be covered, I give 620 talents 12 times in a year, but even this covers not the 1,500 deductible for each member of the family within a calendar year.
为了我们的健康，为了让我们得到保障，我每年分 12 次给予 620 塔兰特，但即使这样，也不足以覆盖每个家庭成员一年内 1,500 塔兰特的免赔额。
And yet for ordinary visits, we still are not covered, nor for many medicines, nor for the teeth within our mouths.
然而，对于普通的探访，我们仍然没有得到保障，也没有得到许多药物的保障，也没有得到我们嘴里的牙齿的保障。
Guess not at what rage is in my mind, for surely, you cannot know.
别猜我心里有多愤怒，因为你肯定不知道。
For I will come to you at the first of the month and at the 15th of the month with the bills and a great whining, and moan.
因为我会在这个月的一号和十五号带着账单和一声巨大的哀鸣和呻吟来见你。
And when the month of taxes comes, I will decry the wrongs and unfairness of it and mourn with wine and ashtrays and rend my receipts.
当纳税月到来时，我会谴责它的错误和不公平，并用酒和烟灰缸哀悼并撕毁我的收据。
And you shall remember that I am that I am, before, after, and until you are 21.
你会记住，在你 21 岁之前、之后、直到你 21 岁之前，我就是我。
Hear me, then, and avoid me in my wrath, O children of me.
那么，请听我说，在我的愤怒中避开我，我的孩子们。
Ian Frazier is a humor writer, essayist, and nonfiction writer.
伊恩·弗雷泽 (Ian Frazier) 是一位幽默作家、散文家和纪实作家。
His collection of humor pieces is called Coyote v.
他的幽默作品集被称为 Coyote v.
Acme, from Farrar, Strauss, & Giroux.
Acme，来自法勒、施特劳斯和吉鲁。
This story was read for us by Peter Sagal, a new father himself, and host of NPR's news quiz program, Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.
这个故事是由彼得·萨格尔（Peter Sagal）为我们朗读的，他本人也是一位新爸爸，也是 NPR 新闻问答节目《等等，等等，别告诉我》的主持人。
[MUSIC PLAYING - "MEAT MAN" BY JERRY LEE LEWIS]
[音乐播放 - JERRY LEE LEWIS 的“MEAT MAN”]
Act Three, Dinner.
第三幕，晚餐。
Well, all this hour, we've been hearing stories of parents and children.
嗯，这一个小时，我们一直在听父母和孩子的故事。
Now, a story of when the children have to become the parents, and what happens.
现在，讲述孩子何时必须成为父母以及会发生什么的故事。
When Dave Eggers's parents died, he was 21.
戴夫·埃格斯 (Dave Eggers) 父母去世时，他 21 岁。
His sister, Beth, was 23.
他的妹妹贝丝 23 岁。
And his brother, Toph, was 8.
他的弟弟 Toph 8 岁。
Dave took custody of Toph, and the two of them moved from Illinois to Berkeley.
戴夫接管了托芙，两人从伊利诺伊州搬到了伯克利。
His sister lived nearby.
他的姐姐住在附近。
This story takes place about a year into his sudden and unexpected turn at parenthood, parenting his brother.
这个故事发生在他突然意外地转变为父母、抚养他的弟弟一年后。
Dinner is really the only meal we treat in any remotely formal way.
晚餐确实是我们唯一以正式方式对待的一餐。
Our days work like this-- first, Toph wakes up at 4:00, 4:30 in the morning, so as to allow 10 minutes to shower, 10 minutes to dress, half an hour to make and eat breakfast, finish his homework, and pack his launch, and at least three and a half hours for cartoons.
我们的一天是这样度过的——首先，托夫在早上4:00、4:30起床，这样就有10分钟的时间洗澡，10分钟的穿衣时间，半小时的时间做早餐、吃早餐、完成作业、收拾行李，还有至少三个半小时的时间看动画片。
At 8:45, he wakes me up.
8点45分，他把我叫醒。
At 8:50, he wakes me up again.
8点50分，他又把我叫醒。
At 8:55, he wakes me up one more time.
8点55分，他又把我叫醒。
And, while yelling at him because he's late, I drive him to school.
我一边因为他迟到而对他大喊大叫，一边开车送他去学校。
I park our little red car next to the school on the east side, where I've been told in four separate flyers and one personal note, is not to used for the loading or unloading of children.
我把我们的红色小车停在东侧学校旁边，四份单独的传单和一张个人便条告诉我，不能用于接送儿童。
Then I grab a piece of paper from his backpack and compose a note.
然后我从他的背包里拿出一张纸，写了一张纸条。
"Dear Mrs. Richardson, I am sorry Toph is late this morning.
“亲爱的理查森夫人，我很抱歉托芙今天早上迟到了。
I could make up something about an appointment or a sickness, but the fact is that we woke up late.
我可以编造一些关于约会或生病的事情，但事实是我们起晚了。
Sincerely, Dave Eggers." He reads the note.
此致，戴夫·艾格斯。”他读了纸条。
"We woke up late?" I give him the look.
“我们起晚了？”我给他看了一眼。
"Fine," he says.
“好吧，”他说。
Then, depending on whether or not we like each other that day, I try to do the across the bucket seats hug.
然后，根据那天我们是否喜欢对方，我尝试隔着桶形座椅拥抱。
I reach over, pull him near, and say, "Your hat smells like urine," because it does.
我伸手把他拉近，说：“你的帽子闻起来像尿味。”因为确实如此。
"No, it doesn't," he says.
“不，事实并非如此，”他说。
It does.
确实如此。
"Smell it," I say.
“闻一闻，”我说。
"I'm not going to smell it," he says.
“我不会闻它的味道，”他说。
"You should wash it," I say.
“你应该洗它，”我说。
"It doesn't smell," he says.
“它没有气味，”他说。
"Whatever," I say.
“不管怎样，”我说。
"Whatever," he mimics.
“随便吧，”他模仿道。
"That's good," I say.
“那很好，”我说。
"I like that." Then I go to work.
“我喜欢这样。”然后我去上班。
After school, my sister, Beth, picks him up, and she stays at our house until I get home, at which point, Beth and I try to fight about something extremely important and lasting.
放学后，我姐姐贝丝来接他，她一直住在我们家直到我回家，此时，贝丝和我试图为一些极其重要且持久的事情而争吵。
"Can you not make such a mess when you come over here?" "Mess?
“你过来能不能别这么乱？” “混乱？
Look at this place?
看看这个地方？
Mess?" And once we have done this, she leaves.
乱吗？”一旦我们完成了这件事，她就离开了。
Then Toph and I cook.
然后托芙和我做饭。
The menu from which we choose consists of seven items and seven items only, which we rotate with mathematical precision.
我们从中选择的菜单由七个项目组成，并且仅包含七个项目，我们以数学精度旋转它们。
Here are the highlights.
以下是亮点。
One, stir-fried beef.
一、炒牛肉。
Sirloin strips, sliced and sauteed in Kikkoman brand soy sauce, cooked until black, served with tortillas, and eaten by hand.
沙朗肉条，切片，用龟甲万牌酱油炒，煮至黑色，配上玉米饼，用手吃。
On the side, we have potatoes, served in the French manner, and sliced oranges and apples, in a bowl.
在旁边，我们有法式土豆，还有切片橙子和苹果，放在碗里。
Two, tacos en fuego.
两个，炸玉米饼。
Ground beef sauteed in Prego spaghetti sauce, traditional style, served with tortillas and without additional embellishment.
Prego 意大利面酱炒碎牛肉，传统风格，搭配玉米饼，没有额外的装饰。
Pillsbury crescent rolls and iceberg salad served on the side.
旁边还有皮尔斯伯里新月卷和冰山沙拉。
Three, pizza pronto, served with pepperoni, courtesy of Pizza Hut.
三是披萨，配意大利辣香肠，由必胜客提供。
Served with a small salad.
配上一份小沙拉。
Four, grilled cheese quesadilla dinner.
四、晚餐烤奶酪玉米饼。
Grilled cheese served with one slice of Kraft American cheese set in the middle of two pieces of seeded Jewish rye, toasted in pan and cut diagonally.
烤奶酪配上一片卡夫美国奶酪，放在两片带籽的犹太黑麦中间，在平底锅中烘烤并斜切。
Quesadillas prepared in skillet with tortillas and American cheese.
油炸玉米粉饼在煎锅中与玉米饼和美国奶酪一起烹制。
Note-- no spices are available.
注意——不提供香料。
There is no salt, no pepper, no parsley, sage, rosemary, or thyme.
没有盐、没有胡椒、没有欧芹、鼠尾草、迷迭香或百里香。
No vegetables are available, except baby carrots, pre-cut celery, cucumbers, green beans, and iceberg lettuce, all served raw and only raw.
没有蔬菜，除了小胡萝卜、预切芹菜、黄瓜、青豆和卷心生菜，所有蔬菜都是生的，而且只生吃。
Pasta is not available because it smells funny and is too slithery.
意大利面不可用，因为它闻起来怪怪的，而且太滑了。
All meals are served with a tall glass of 1% milk with the gallon jug resting on the floor next to the table for convenient refills.
所有餐点均配有一大杯 1% 牛奶，一加仑的水壶放在桌子旁边的地板上，方便补充。
Alternative beverages are not available.
不提供替代饮料。
Anything not on the menu is not available.
菜单上没有的任何东西都不可用。
Any complaints will be handled quickly and with severity.
任何投诉都将得到迅速、严肃的处理。
We cook about four times a week.
我们每周大约做饭四次。
"Hey, I need your help," I say when I need his help cooking.
“嘿，我需要你的帮助，”当我需要他帮忙做饭时，我会说。
"OK," he says, and then he helps out with the cooking.
“好吧，”他说，然后帮忙做饭。
Sometimes we sing while we're cooking.
有时我们一边做饭一边唱歌。
We sing regular words, words about pouring the milk or getting the spaghetti sauce or microwaving the tortillas, but we sing them in opera style.
我们唱常规的单词，比如倒牛奶、拿意大利面酱或用微波炉加热玉米饼，但我们用歌剧风格来唱。
We can sing lots of different ways, but the opera style is pretty impressive.
我们可以唱很多不同的方式，但歌剧风格令人印象深刻。
People have said so.
人们都这么说过。
Sometimes while cooking, we have sword fights with wooden spoons, or with the dowels that used to hold up the drapes.
有时做饭时，我们会用木勺或用来固定窗帘的木钉进行剑斗。
It's an unsaid mission of mine, the source of which is sometimes clear and sometimes not, to keep things moving, to entertain the boy, to keep him on his toes.
这是我的一项未言明的使命，其来源有时是明确的，有时则不是，让事情继续下去，娱乐男孩，让他保持警惕。
For a while, we would chase each other around the house, from bathroom to kitchen to bathroom, mouths full of water, threatening to spit.
有一段时间，我们会在房子里互相追逐，从浴室到厨房再到浴室，满嘴都是水，威胁要吐口水。
Of course, neither of us would have ever thought of actually spitting a mouthful of water at the other inside the house.
当然，我们谁也不会想到会在屋内向对方吐一口水。
Until one night, when I had him cornered in the kitchen, I just went ahead and did it.
直到有一天晚上，当我把他逼到厨房里时，我才继续这么做。
Things have been devolving ever since.
从那时起，事情就一直在恶化。
I've stuck a half cantaloupe into his face.
我把半个哈密瓜塞到他脸上。
I've rubbed a handful of banana into his chest, poured a glassful of apple juice on his head.
我把一把香蕉擦进他的胸口，把一杯苹果汁倒在他的头上。
It's all part of an effort, I'm guessing, to let him know, if it weren't already pretty obvious, that we're not in Kansas anymore, or Illinois.
我猜，这一切都是为了让他知道，如果还不是很明显的话，我们已经不在堪萨斯州或伊利诺伊州了。
There's a voice inside me, a very excited, chirpy voice, that urges me to keep things merry, madcap even, the mood buoyant.
我内心有一个声音，一个非常兴奋、欢快的声音，催促我保持快乐，甚至疯狂，心情愉悦。
Because Beth is always pulling out old photo albums, crying, and asking Toph how he feels, I feel like I have to overcompensate, keep us occupied.
因为贝丝总是拿出旧相册，哭着问托夫感觉如何，我觉得我必须过度补偿，让我们忙起来。
I'm making our lives a music video, a game show on Nickelodeon, with quick cuts, crazy camera angles, lots of fun, fun, fun.
我正在把我们的生活制作成音乐视频，尼克儿童频道的游戏节目，快速剪辑，疯狂的拍摄角度，非常有趣，有趣，有趣。
It's a campaign of distraction and disinformation, leaflets dropped behind enemy lines, flares and fireworks, funny dances, shell games, magic tricks.
这是一场分散注意力和虚假信息的运动，在敌后投放传单、照明弹和烟花、滑稽的舞蹈、骗局、魔术。
What's that?
那是什么？
Lookie there.
看那儿。
Where'd it go?
它去哪儿了？
In the kitchen, when the inspiration strikes, I take out the family's 17-inch turkey knife, plant my legs square to him, squat a little, and hold the knife over my head samurai style.
在厨房里，当灵感袭来时，我拿出家里的17英寸火鸡刀，双腿与他成直角，稍微蹲下，然后像武士一样将刀举过头顶。
"Hiiiii!" I yell.
“嗨！”我大喊。
"Don't," Toph says, backing away.
“别这样，”托芙说着，向后退了一步。
"Huaa!" I yell, stepping toward him, because threatening children with 17-inch knives is funny.
“哗啊！”我大喊，朝他走去，因为用 17 英寸的刀威胁孩子很有趣。
"Not funny," he says, halfway up the stairs.
“不好笑，”他一边说，一边走上楼梯。
I put the knife away.
我把刀收了起来。
"Dad used to do that all the time," I say.
“爸爸以前总是这么做，”我说。
"Out of the blue, he'd get this look on his face, this bug-eyed sort of look, and act like you he was going to split our heads open with the knife." "Sounds funny," says Toph.
“出乎意料的是，他的脸上会露出这种表情，这种瞪大眼睛的表情，并且表现得就像你一样，他要用刀把我们的头劈开。” “听起来很有趣，”托夫说。
"Yeah," I say.
“是的，”我说。
"It was real funny."
“这真的很有趣。”
Sometimes while we cook, he tells me about things that happened at school.
有时我们做饭的时候，他会告诉我在学校发生的事情。
"What happened today?" I ask.
“今天发生什么事了？”我问。
He gives me the full rundown, who's a dork and who's OK, what everyone wrote their papers on, the whole thing.
他给了我完整的概要，谁是傻瓜，谁是好人，每个人写论文的内容，整个事情。
One time, he said this.
有一次，他这样说过。
"Today, Carl told me that he hopes you and Beth are in a plane, and that the plane crashes, and that you both die, just like Mom and Dad." "They didn't die in a plane crash," I say.
“今天，卡尔告诉我，他希望你和贝丝在飞机上，但飞机坠毁了，你们都死了，就像爸爸妈妈一样。” “他们没有死于空难，”我说。
"I told him that," he says.
“我告诉他了，”他说。
Sometimes I call the parents of Toph's classmates.
有时我会给托夫同学的父母打电话。
"Yeah, that's what he said," I say.
“是的，他就是这么说的，”我说。
"It's hard enough, you know," I say, pouring it on.
“你知道，这已经够难的了，”我说道，继续说道。
"No, he's OK.
“不，他没事。
He's fine.
他很好。
I just don't know why Carl would say that.
我只是不知道卡尔为什么会这么说。
I mean, why do you suppose your son wants me and Beth to die in a plane crash?
我的意思是，你认为你儿子为什么要让我和贝丝死于飞机失事？
I just couldn't help wondering," I say.
我只是忍不住想知道，”我说。
"No, no, he's fine.
“不，不，他很好。
Don't worry about us.
别担心我们。
You should worry about young Carl there.
你应该担心那里的年轻卡尔。
I just wanted to let you know," I say.
我只是想让你知道，”我说。
They'll let anyone be parents.
他们会让任何人成为父母。
During dinner, when there's basketball on, we watch the Bulls on cable.
晚餐时，当有篮球比赛时，我们通过有线电视观看公牛队的比赛。
Otherwise, between bites, we play gin or crazy eights.
否则，在吃饭的间隙，我们会玩杜松子酒或疯狂的八分牌。
If the dining room table is in ping pong mode, we eat on the coffee table.
如果餐桌处于乒乓球模式，我们就在咖啡桌上吃饭。
If the coffee table is in homework mode, we eat on the family room floor.
如果咖啡桌处于家庭作业模式，我们就在家庭活动室的地板上吃饭。
If the family room floor is covered with plates from the night before, we eat in Toph's room on the carpet, watching his portable TV, which sits next to his bed.
如果家庭房间的地板上铺满了前一天晚上的盘子，我们就会在托夫房间的地毯上吃饭，看着他床边的便携式电视。
I know, I know.
我知道，我知道。
The kitchen table, which is usually clean and has chairs around, and has room for plates and glasses and silverware, is out of the question.
厨房的桌子通常是干净的，周围有椅子，并且有空间放置盘子、玻璃杯和银器，这是不可能的。
I mean, where's the fun in that?
我的意思是，这其中的乐趣在哪里？
And where's the challenge?
挑战在哪里？
After dinner, we play games for our own amusement and the edification of the neighbors.
晚饭后，我们玩游戏，既自娱自乐，又启迪邻居。
One game involves the cracking of the leather belt to simulate some well-deserved corporal punishment.
其中一款游戏涉及打碎皮带，以模拟一些当之无愧的体罚。
Most involve Toph pretending that he's a kid, while I pretend I'm a parent.
大多数情况下，托夫假装自己是个孩子，而我则假装自己是父母。
"Dad, can I drive the car?" he asks as I sit reading the paper.
“爸爸，我可以开车吗？”当我坐下来读报纸时，他问道。
"No, son, you can't," I say, without looking up.
“不，儿子，你不能，”我头也不抬地说。
"But why?" "Because I said so." "But Dad." "I said no." "I hate you I hate you, I hate you, I hate you," he shrieks.
“但为什么？” “因为我就是这么说的。” “但是爸爸。” “我说不。” “我恨你，我恨你，我恨你，我恨你，”他尖叫道。
Then he runs to his room and slams the door.
然后他跑回自己的房间，关上门。
After a second, he opens the door.
过了一会儿，他打开门。
"Was that good?" He asks.
“这样好吗？”他问道。
"Yeah," I say.
“是的，”我说。
"That was pretty good."
“那太好了。”
Dave Eggers edits the journal Timothy McSweeney's Quarterly Concern and is finishing a book about raising Toph, from which this story was taken.
戴夫·埃格斯 (Dave Eggers) 是《蒂莫西·麦克斯威尼季刊关注》(Timothy McSweeney's Quarterly Concern) 杂志的编辑，他正在完成一本关于抚养托芙 (Toph) 的书，本故事就取自该书。
Toph is now in high school, doing just fine.
Toph现在已经上高中了，成绩还不错。
Well, our program was produced today by Nancy Updike and myself with Alix Spiegel and Julie Snyder, contributing editors Paul Tough, Jack Hitt, Margy Rochlin, and Consigliere Sarah Vowell.
好吧，我们今天的节目由南希·厄普代克和我本人、阿利克斯·斯皮格尔和朱莉·斯奈德、特约编辑保罗·托夫、杰克·希特、玛吉·罗克林和顾问莎拉·沃威尔共同制作。
Production help from [?
来自 [?的生产帮助
Emmie Takehara, ?] Todd Bachmann, and Sylvia Lemus.
埃米·竹原，？]托德·巴赫曼和西尔维娅·莱姆斯。
Music help today from John Connors.
今天约翰·康纳斯提供音乐帮助。
[ACKNOWLEDGMENTS] If you'd like to buy a cassette of this program or any of our programs, they make perfect Christmas presents.
[致谢] 如果您想购买该节目或我们任何节目的磁带，它们是完美的圣诞礼物。
Call us here at WBEZ in Chicago, 312-832-3380.
请致电芝加哥 WBEZ，电话：312-832-3380。
312-832-3380.
312-832-3380。
Our email address, [email protected] Or you can listen to most of our programs for free on the internet at our website, www.thislife.org.
我们的电子邮件地址，[email protected] 或者您可以在我们的网站 www.thislife.org 上免费收听我们的大部分节目。
Thanks to Elizabeth Meister, who runs the site.
感谢该网站的运营者伊丽莎白·梅斯特 (Elizabeth Meister)。
This American Life is distributed by Public Radio International.
《美国生活》由国际公共广播电台发行。
[FUNDING CREDITS] WBEZ management oversight by Torey Malatia, who warns you, if you do not pledge to your public radio station--
[资金来源] WBEZ 管理由 Torey Malatia 负责监督，他警告您，如果您不向您的公共广播电台做出承诺——
You will fall into iniquity, and I will know.
你会陷入罪孽之中，我会知道的。
And you shall have no dessert.
而且你不可以吃甜点。
I'm Ira Glass, back next week with more stories of This American Life.
我是艾拉·格拉斯，下周回来，带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
And now behold, even as I have said, it has come to pass.
现在看，正如我所说，它已经实现了。
This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange.
《This American Life》与 WBEZ Chicago 合作制作，并由 PRX 公共广播电台传送到各电台。