His Family

THE MACMILLAN COMPANY NEW YORK BOSTON CHICAGO DALLAS ATLANTA SAN FRANCISCO

麦克米伦公司 纽约 波士顿 芝加哥 达拉斯 亚特兰大 旧金山

MACMILLAN & CO., LIMITED LONDON BOMBAY CALCUTTA MELBOURNE

麦克米伦有限公司 伦敦 孟买 加尔各答 墨尔本

THE MACMILLAN CO. OF CANADA, LTD. TORONTO

加拿大麦克米伦有限公司多伦多

HIS FAMILY

他的家人

BY ERNEST POOLE AUTHOR OF "THE HARBOR"

作者：欧内斯特·普尔 《港口》作者

New York THE MACMILLAN COMPANY.

纽约麦克米伦公司。

1917

1917年

_All rights reserved_

_保留所有权利_

COPYRIGHT, 1916 AND 1917 BY THE RIDGWAY COMPANY

版权所有，1916 年和 1917 年，归李奇威公司所有

COPYRIGHT, 1917 BY THE MACMILLAN COMPANY

版权所有，1917 年，麦克米伦公司

Set up and electrotyped.

设置并电铸。

Published May, 1917.

1917 年 5 月出版。

TO M.A.

致文学硕士

HIS FAMILY

他的家人

HIS FAMILY

他的家人

CHAPTER I

第一章

He was thinking of the town he had known.

他想起了他所熟悉的那个小镇。

Not of _old_ New York--he had heard of that from old, old men when he himself had still been young and had smiled at their garrulity.

不是古老的纽约——当他自己还年轻的时候，他就从老人们那里听说过这个地方，并对他们的喋喋不休感到微笑。

He was thinking of a _young_ New York, the mighty throbbing city to which he had come long ago as a lad from the New Hampshire mountains.

他想到了一个年轻的纽约，这座充满活力的强大城市，他很久以前作为一个小伙子从新罕布什尔州山区来到这里。

A place of turbulent thoroughfares, of shouting drivers, hurrying crowds, the crack of whips and the clatter of wheels; an uproarious, thrilling town of enterprise, adventure, youth; a city of pulsing energies, the center of a boundless land; a port of commerce with all the world, of stately ships with snowy sails; a fascinating pleasure town, with throngs of eager travellers hurrying from the ferry boats and rolling off in hansom cabs to the huge hotels on Madison Square.

这是一个充满喧闹的大道、呼喊的司机、匆忙的人群、鞭子的噼啪声和车轮的嘎嘎声的地方；一个喧闹、刺激的小镇，充满进取心、冒险精神和青春气息；一座充满活力的城市，无边无际的土地的中心；与世界各地通商的港口，停泊着雪帆的庄严船只；这是一座令人着迷的游乐小镇，成群结队的热切游客从渡船上匆匆而来，乘坐双轮马车前往麦迪逊广场上的大型酒店。

A city where American faces were still to be seen upon all its streets, a cleaner and a kindlier town, with more courtesy in its life, less of the vulgar scramble.

这座城市的所有街道上仍然可以看到美国人的面孔，一个更干净、更友善的小镇，生活中更加礼貌，更少了粗俗的争吵。

A city of houses, separate homes, of quiet streets with rustling trees, with people on the doorsteps upon warm summer evenings and groups of youngsters singing as they came trooping by in the dark.

一座由房屋组成的城市，独立的住宅，安静的街道，树木沙沙作响，温暖的夏日夜晚，人们站在门口，一群群年轻人在黑暗中成群结队地唱歌。

A place of music and romance.

一个充满音乐和浪漫的地方。

At the old opera house downtown, on those dazzling evenings when as a boy he had ushered there for the sake of hearing the music, how the rich joy of being alive, of being young, of being loved, had shone out of women's eyes.

在市中心的老歌剧院，在那些令人眼花缭乱的夜晚，当他还是个孩子的时候，为了听音乐而被引到那里，女人的眼中闪耀着活着的、年轻的、被爱的丰富的快乐。

Shimmering satins, dainty gloves and little jewelled slippers, shapely arms and shoulders, vivacious movements, nods and smiles, swift glances, ripples, bursts of laughter, an exciting hum of voices.

闪闪发光的缎子，精致的手套和镶满宝石的小拖鞋，匀称的手臂和肩膀，活泼的动作，点头和微笑，快速的目光，涟漪，阵阵笑声，令人兴奋的嗡嗡声。

Then silence, sudden darkness--and music, and the curtain.

然后是寂静，突然的黑暗——还有音乐和幕布。

The great wide curtain slowly rising....

宽阔的大幕缓缓升起……

But all that had passed away.

但这一切都已经过去了。

Roger Gale was a rugged heavy man not quite sixty years of age.

罗杰·盖尔是一位粗犷、魁梧的男人，年龄还不到六十岁。

His broad, massive features were already deeply furrowed, and there were two big flecks of white in his close-curling, grayish hair.

他宽阔而魁梧的五官已经布满了深深的皱纹，紧卷的灰白头发里有两大块白色斑点。

He lived in a narrow red brick house down on the lower west side of the town, in a neighborhood swiftly changing.

他住在城镇下西侧的一栋狭窄的红砖房子里，周围的社区正在迅速变化。

His wife was dead.

他的妻子死了。

He had no sons, but three grown daughters, of whom the oldest, Edith, had been married many years.

他没有儿子，只有三个已成年的女儿，其中最大的女儿伊迪丝已结婚多年。

Laura and Deborah lived at home, but they were both out this evening.

劳拉和黛博拉住在家里，但今晚她们都出去了。

It was Friday, Edith's evening, and as was her habit she had come from her apartment uptown to dine with her father and play chess.

那是星期五，伊迪丝的晚上，按照她的习惯，她从住宅区的公寓来到这里，和父亲一起吃饭，下棋。

In the living room, a cheerful place, with its lamp light and its shadows, its old-fashioned high-back chairs, its sofa, its book cases, its low marble mantel with the gilt mirror overhead, they sat at a small oval table in front of a quiet fire of coals.

客厅里，灯光和影子、老式高背椅、沙发、书柜、低矮的大理石壁炉架，头顶上挂着镀金镜子，是一个令人愉快的地方，他们坐在一张椭圆形小桌前，面前是安静的煤火。

And through the smoke of his cigar Roger watched his daughter.

透过雪茄的烟雾，罗杰看着他的女儿。

Edith had four children, and was soon to have another.

伊迪丝有四个孩子，而且很快就会有另一个孩子。

A small demure woman of thirty-five, with light soft hair and clear blue eyes and limbs softly rounded, the contour of her features was full with approaching maternity, but there was a decided firmness in the lines about her little mouth.

一个三十五岁的小个子端庄女人，浅色柔软的头发，清澈的蓝眼睛，四肢柔和圆润，五官的轮廓充满了接近母性的气息，但她的小嘴周围的线条却明显坚定。

As he watched her now, her father's eyes, deep set and gray and with signs of long years of suffering in them, displayed a grave whimsical wistfulness.

当他现在看着她时，她父亲的眼睛深陷，灰色，带着长年痛苦的痕迹，流露出一种严肃而异想天开的渴望。

For by the way she was playing the game he saw how old she thought him.

因为从她玩游戏的方式来看，他看出她认为他有多大了。

Her play was slow and absent-minded, and there came long periods when she did not make a move.

她下棋缓慢而心不在焉，而且有很长一段时间她一动不动。

Then she would recall herself and look up with a little affectionate smile that showed she looked upon him as too heavy with his age to have noticed her small lapses.

然后她会回忆起自己，抬起头来，脸上带着一丝深情的微笑，这表明她认为他年纪太大了，没有注意到她的小失误。

He was grimly amused at her attitude, for he did not feel old at all.

他对她的态度感到好笑，因为他一点也不觉得自己老了。

With that whimsical hint of a smile which had grown to be a part of him, he tried various moves on the board to see how far he could go without interrupting her reveries.

带着那股异想天开的微笑，这种微笑已经成为他的一部分，他在棋盘上尝试了各种动作，看看自己能走多远而不打扰她的沉思。

He checkmated her, re-lit his cigar and waited until she should notice it.

他将死了她，重新点燃雪茄，等待她注意到。

And when she did not notice, gravely he moved back his queen and let the game continue.

当她没有注意到时，他严肃地把王后移开，让游戏继续进行。

How many hundreds of games, he thought, Edith must have played with him in the long years when his spirit was dead, for her now to take such chances.

他想，在他精神消逝的漫长岁月里，伊迪丝一定和他玩了多少场比赛，现在她才敢冒险。

Nearly every Friday evening for nearly sixteen years.

近十六年来几乎每个星期五晚上。

Before that, Judith his wife had been here.

在此之前，他的妻子朱迪思就来过这里。

It was then that the city had been young, for to Roger it had always seemed as though he were just beginning life.

那时，这座城市还很年轻，因为对罗杰来说，他的生活似乎才刚刚开始。

Into its joys and sorrows too he had groped his way as most of us do, and had never penetrated deep.

他也像我们大多数人一样，在其中的欢乐和悲伤中摸索着，但从未深入过。

But he had meant to, later on.

但后来他就有意这么做了。

When in his busy city days distractions had arisen, always he had promised himself that sooner or later he would return to this interest or passion, for the world still lay before him with its enthralling interests, its beauties and its pleasures, its tasks and all its puzzles, intricate and baffling, all some day to be explored.

当他在忙碌的城市生活中出现干扰时，他总是向自己保证，迟早他会恢复这种兴趣或激情，因为世界仍然摆在他面前，充满着令人着迷的兴趣，它的美丽和乐趣，它的任务和所有的谜题，复杂而令人困惑，总有一天需要探索。

This deep zest in Roger Gale had been bred in his boyhood on a farm up in the New Hampshire mountains.

罗杰·盖尔的这种浓厚的热情是在他童年时在新罕布什尔州山区的一个农场里养成的。

There his family had lived for many generations.

他的家人在那里生活了很多代。

And from the old house, the huge shadowy barn and the crude little sawmill down the road; from animals, grown people and still more from other boys, from the meadows and the mountain above with its cliffs and caves and forests of pine, young Roger had discovered, even in those early years, that life was fresh, abundant, new, with countless glad beginnings.

从老房子、阴暗的大谷仓和路边简陋的小锯木厂来看；从动物、成年人，还有更多的其他男孩，从草地和山上的悬崖、洞穴和松树林，年轻的罗杰即使在早年就已经发现，生活是新鲜的、丰富的、新的，有无数快乐的开始。

At seventeen he had come to New York.

十七岁时，他来到了纽约。

There had followed hard struggles in lean years, but his rugged health had buoyed him up.

在经济困难的岁月里，他经历了艰苦的奋斗，但他崎岖的健康状况让他振作起来。

And there had been genial friendships and dreams and explorations, a search for romance, the strange glory of love, a few furtive ventures that left him dismayed.

他也有过友善的友谊、梦想和探索，对浪漫的追求，爱情的奇异荣耀，以及一些让他沮丧的秘密冒险。

But though love had seemed sordid at such times it had brought him crude exultations.

尽管爱情在这种时候显得肮脏，却给他带来了粗俗的狂喜。

And if his existence had grown more obscure, it had been somber only in patches, the main picture dazzling still.

如果说他的存在变得更加模糊，那也只是零星的阴郁，而主要画面仍然令人眼花缭乱。

And still he had been just making starts.

但他仍然刚刚开始。

He had ventured into the business world, clerking now at this, now at that, and always looking about him for some big opportunity.

他冒险进入了商界，时而做这个，时而做那个，总是四处寻找一些大机会。

It had come and he had seized it, despite the warnings of his friends.

它来了，他不顾朋友们的警告，抓住了它。

What a wild adventure it had been a bureau of news clippings, a business new and unheard of but he had been sure that here was growth, he had worked at it day and night, and the business widening fast had revealed long ramifications which went winding and stretching away into every phase of American life.

新闻剪报真是一次疯狂的冒险，一项新的、闻所未闻的业务，但他确信这里有增长，他夜以继日地工作，业务的快速扩张已经揭示了长期的影响，这些影响蜿蜒延伸到美国人生活的各个阶段。

And this life was like a forest, boundless and impenetrable, up-springing, intertwining.

而这一生，就像一座森林，无边无际，密不可分，生机勃勃，交织在一起。

How much could _he_ ever know of it all?

她对这一切了解多少？

Then had come his marriage.

然后他的婚姻就到了。

Judith's family had lived long in New York, but some had died and others had scattered until only she was left.

朱迪思的家人在纽约生活了很长时间，但有些人去世了，有些人分散了，只剩下她了。

This house had been hers, but she had been poor, so she had leased it to some friends.

这房子本来是她的，但她穷，所以租给了一些朋友。

It was through them he had met her here, and within a few weeks he had fallen in love.

正是通过他们，他在这里遇见了她，几周之内他就坠入爱河。

He had felt profound disgust for the few wild oats he had sown, and in his swift reaction he had overworshipped the girl, her beauty and her purity, until in a delicate way of her own she had hinted that he was going too far, that she, too, was human and a passionate lover of living, in spite of her low quiet voice and her demure and sober eyes.

他对自己种下的几颗野燕麦感到深深的厌恶，在他的迅速反应中，他过度崇拜这个女孩，她的美丽和她的纯洁，直到她以一种微妙的方式暗示他太过分了，尽管她的声音低沉安静，眼神端庄而清醒，但她也是人，是一个热爱生活的人。

And what beginnings for Roger now, what a piling up of intimate joys, surprises, shocks of happiness.

现在罗杰的生活开始了，充满了亲密的欢乐、惊喜和幸福的震撼。

There had come disappointments, too, sudden severe little checks from his wife which had brought him occasional questionings.

失望也随之而来，他的妻子突然发出严厉的小检查，这使他偶尔受到质疑。

This love had not been quite _all_ he had dreamed, this woman not so ardent.

这种爱情并不完全是他所梦想的，这个女人并不那么热情。

He had glimpsed couples here and there that set him to imagining more consuming passions.

他到处瞥见情侣，这让他开始想象更强烈的激情。

Here again he had not explored very deep.

在这里他又没有探索得很深入。

But he had dismissed regrets like these with only a slight reluctance.

但他只是略带不情愿地打消了这样的遗憾。

For if they had settled down a bit with the coming of their children, their love had grown rich in sympathies and silent understandings, in humorous enjoyment of their funny little daughters' chattering like magpies in the genial old house.

因为如果他们随着孩子的到来而安定下来，他们的爱就会变得丰富，充满同情和无声的理解，幽默地享受他们有趣的小女儿像喜鹊在温馨的老房子里喋喋不休的喋喋不休。

And they had looked happily far ahead.

他们幸福地看着前方。

What a woman she had been for plans.

她是一个多么有计划的女人啊。

It had not been all smooth sailing.

事情并非一帆风顺。

There had come reverses in business, and at home one baby, a boy, had died.

生意出现了逆转，家里的一个婴儿，一个男孩，死了。

But on they had gone and the years had swept by until he had reached his forties.

但他们已经过去了，岁月流逝，直到他四十多岁了。

Absorbed in his growing business and in his thriving family, it had seemed to Roger still as though he were just starting out.

罗杰全神贯注于不断发展的事业和欣欣向荣的家庭，但在罗杰看来，他似乎才刚刚起步。

But one day, quite suddenly, the house had become a strange place to him with a strange remote figure in it, his wife.

但有一天，突然之间，这座房子对他来说变成了一个陌生的地方，里面有一个陌生的遥远人物，那就是他的妻子。

For he had learned that she must die.

因为他知道她必须死。

There had followed terrible weeks.

接下来是可怕的几周。

Then Judith had faced their disaster.

然后朱迪思就面临着他们的灾难。

Little by little she had won back the old intimacy with her husband; and through the slow but inexorable progress of her ailment, again they had come together in long talks and plans for their children.

渐渐地，她又恢复了与丈夫的亲密关系。随着她的病情缓慢但不可阻挡地发展，他们再次聚在一起进行了长时间的交谈，并为孩子们制定了计划。

At this same chessboard, in this room, repeatedly she would stop the game and smiling she would look into the future.

在同一个棋盘上，在这个房间里，她会反复停止游戏，微笑着展望未来。

At one such time she had said to him,

有一次她对他说：

"I wonder if it won't be the same with the children as it has been with us.

“我想知道孩子们的情况是否会和我们一样。

No matter how long each one of them lives, won't their lives feel to them unfinished like ours, only just beginning?

无论他们每个人活多久，他们的生活不会像我们一样感觉还没有结束，才刚刚开始吗？

I wonder how far they will go.

我想知道他们会走多远。

And then their children will grow up and it will be the same with them.

然后他们的孩子就会长大，他们也会一样。

Unfinished lives.

未完成的人生。

Oh, dearie, what children all of us are."

哦，亲爱的，我们都是多么孩子啊。”

He had put his arm around her then and had held her very tight.

那时他用手臂搂住了她，紧紧地抱住了她。

And feeling the violent trembling of her husband's fierce revolt, slowly bending back her head and looking up into his eyes she had continued steadily:

感受到丈夫强烈反抗带来的剧烈颤抖，她慢慢地低下头，抬头看着他的眼睛，坚定地继续说道：

"And when you come after me, my dear, oh, how hungry I shall be for all you will tell me.

“当你追随我时，亲爱的，哦，我会多么渴望你告诉我的一切。

For you will live on in our children's lives."

因为你将继续活在我们孩子的生活中。”

And she had asked him to promise her that.

她要求他向她保证这一点。

But he had not kept his promise.

但他没有遵守诺言。

For after Judith's dying he had felt himself terribly alone, with eternity around him, his wife slipping far away.

因为朱迪思死后，他感到自己非常孤独，永恒围绕着他，他的妻子也渐渐远去。

And the universe had grown stark and hard, impersonal, relentless, cold.

宇宙变得冷酷、冷酷、冷漠、无情、无情。

A storm of doubts had attacked his faith.

一阵怀疑的风暴袭击了他的信仰。

And though he had resisted long, for his faith in God had been rooted deep in the mountains of New England, in the end it had been wrenched away, and with it he had lost all hope that either for Judith or himself was there any existence beyond the grave.

尽管他长期以来一直在抗拒，因为他对上帝的信仰已深深植根于新英格兰的山区，但最终它还是被夺走了，他也因此失去了一切希望，无论是对朱迪思还是他自己来说，坟墓之外还有任何存在。

So death had come to Roger's soul.

所以罗杰的灵魂已经死亡了。

He had been deaf and blind to his children.

他对他的孩子们既聋又瞎。

Nights by the thousand spent alone.

数以千计的夜晚都是独自度过的。

Like a gray level road in his memory now was the story of his family.

现在，他的记忆中就像一条灰色的道路，讲述的是他家人的故事。

When had his spirit begun to awaken?

他的神魂是什么时候开始觉醒的？

He could not tell, it had been so slow.

他说不出来，速度太慢了。

His second daughter, Deborah, who had stayed at home with her father when Laura had gone away to school, had done little things continually to rouse his interest in life.

当劳拉去上学时，他的二女儿黛博拉一直留在家里和父亲在一起，她不断地做一些小事来激发他对生活的兴趣。

Edith's winsome babies had attracted him when they came to the house.

当伊迪丝可爱的孩子们来到家里时，他们就吸引了他。

Laura had returned from school, a joyous creature, tall and slender, with snapping black eyes, and had soon made her presence felt.

劳拉从学校回来了，她是一个快乐的人，又高又苗条，有着一双锐利的黑眼睛，很快就让人感觉到她的存在。

One day in the early afternoon, as he entered the house there had burst on his ears a perfect gale of laughter; and peering through the portières he had seen the dining-room full of young girls, a crew as wild as Laura herself.

一天下午，当他走进屋子时，耳边突然传来一阵大笑声。透过门廊，他看到餐厅里挤满了年轻女孩，一群人就像劳拉本人一样狂野。

Hastily he had retreated upstairs.

连忙退到楼上。

But he had enjoyed such glimpses.

但他很享受这样的一瞥。

He had liked to see her fresh pretty gowns and to have her come in and kiss him good-night.

他喜欢看到她新穿的漂亮礼服，喜欢让她进来亲吻他道晚安。

Then had come a sharp heavy jolt.

然后是一阵剧烈的震动。

His business had suffered from long neglect, and suddenly for two anxious weeks he had found himself facing bankruptcy.

他的生意长期被忽视，在焦虑的两周里，他突然发现自己面临破产。

Edith's husband, a lawyer, had come to his aid and together they had pulled out of the hole.

伊迪丝的律师丈夫赶来帮助他，他们一起摆脱了困境。

But he had been forced to mortgage the house.

但他被迫抵押了房子。

And this had brought to a climax all the feelings of guiltiness which had so long been stirring within him over his failure to live up to the promise he had made his wife.

这让他长期以来因未能履行对妻子的承诺而在他内心激起的所有愧疚感达到了顶峰。

And so Roger had looked at his children.

罗杰也这样看着他的孩子们。

And at first to his profound surprise he had had it forced upon him that these were three grown women, each equipped with her own peculiar feminine traits and desires, the swift accumulations of lives which had expanded in a city that had reared to the skies in the many years of his long sleep.

起初，令他深感惊讶的是，他被迫意识到这是三个成年女性，每个人都有自己独特的女性特质和欲望，这些生命的迅速积累在他长眠多年的这座耸入云霄的城市中得以扩展。

But very slowly, month by month, he had gained a second impression which seemed to him deeper and more real.

但慢慢地，一月又一月，他获得了第二个印象，对他来说，这个印象似乎更深刻、更真实。

To the eye they were grown women all, but inwardly they were children still, each groping for her happiness and each held back as he had been, either by checks within herself or by the gay distractions of the absorbing city.

从表面上看，她们都是成年女性，但内心仍然是孩子，每个人都在摸索着自己的幸福，每个人都像以前一样感到压抑，要么是因为自己内心的压抑，要么是因为这座令人着迷的城市的快乐干扰。

He saw each of his daughters, parts of himself.

他看到了他的每一个女儿，也看到了他自己的一部分。

And he remembered what Judith had said: "You will live on in our children's lives." And he began to get glimmerings of a new immortality, made up of generations, an endless succession of other lives extending into the future.

他还记得朱迪思说过的话：“你将永远活在我们孩子的生命中。”他开始看到一种新的不朽的光芒，它由几代人组成，无数的其他生命延伸到未来。

Some of all this he remembered now, in scattered fragments here and there.

他现在还记得其中一些，只是零散的碎片。

Then from somewhere far away a great bell began booming the hour, and it roused him from his revery.

这时，远处传来一声大钟声，敲响了报时的钟声，把他从沉思中惊醒。

He had often heard the bell of late.

最近他经常听到铃声。

A calm deep-toned intruder, it had first struck in upon his attention something over two years ago.

这是一个冷静、深沉的入侵者，它第一次引起他的注意是在两年多前。

Vaguely he had wondered about it.

他隐隐约约地对此感到好奇。

Soon he had found it was on the top of a tower a little to the north, one of the highest pinnacles of this tumultuous modern town.

很快他就发现它位于北面不远的一座塔楼的顶部，这是这座喧闹的现代城镇的最高尖顶之一。

But the bell was not tumultuous.

但钟声并不喧闹。

And as he listened it seemed to say, "There is still time, but you have not long."

当他听的时候，它似乎在说：“还有时间，但时间不多了。”

Edith, sitting opposite him, looked up at the sound with a stir of relief.

伊迪丝坐在他对面，抬头看着声音，松了口气。

Ten o'clock.

十点了。

It was time to go home.

是时候回家了。

"I wonder what's keeping Bruce," she said.

“我想知道是什么让布鲁斯坚持下去，”她说。

Bruce was still in his office downtown.

布鲁斯仍在市中心的办公室里。

As a rule on Friday evenings he came with his wife to supper here, but this week he had some new business on hand.

按照惯例，周五晚上他会和妻子一起来这里吃晚饭，但这周他手头上有一些新的事务。

Edith was vague about it.

伊迪丝对此含糊其辞。

As she tried to explain she knitted her brows and said that Bruce was working too hard.

当她试图解释时，她皱起了眉头，说布鲁斯工作得太辛苦了。

And her father grunted assent.

她的父亲咕哝着同意了。

"Bruce ought to knock off every summer," he said, "for a good solid month, or better two.

“布鲁斯每年夏天都应该休息，”他说，“一个月，最好是两个月。

Can't you bring him up to the mountains this year?" He referred to the old New Hampshire home which he had kept as a summer place.

今年你就不能带他上山吗？”他提到了他保留下来作为避暑胜地的新罕布什尔州老房子。

But Edith smiled at the idea.

但伊迪丝对这个想法笑了。

"Yes, I could bring him," she replied, "and in a week he'd be perfectly crazy to get back to his office again." She compressed her lips.

“是的，我可以带他来，”她回答道，“一周后他会疯狂地再次回到他的办公室。”她抿紧嘴唇。

"I know what he needs--and we'll do it some day, in spite of him."

“我知道他需要什么——总有一天我们会做到的，不管他如何。”

"A suburb, eh," her father said, and his face took on a look of dislike.

“郊区，呃，”她父亲说道，脸上露出了厌恶的表情。

They had often talked of suburbs.

他们经常谈论郊区。

"Yes," his daughter answered, "I've picked out the very house." He threw at her a glance of impatience.

“是的，”他的女儿回答，“我已经选好了那栋房子。”他不耐烦地看了她一眼。

He knew what had started her on this line.

他知道是什么让她走上这条路。

Edith's friend, Madge Deering, was living out in Morristown.

伊迪丝的朋友玛奇·迪林住在莫里斯敦。

All very well, he reflected, but her case was not at all the same.

一切都很好，他想，但她的情况却完全不同。

He had known Madge pretty well.

他很了解玛奇。

Although the death of her husband had left her a widow at twenty-nine, with four small daughters to bring up, she had gone on determinedly.

尽管丈夫的去世使她在二十九岁时成为寡妇，还要抚养四个小女儿，但她仍坚定地走下去。

Naturally smart and able, Madge was always running to town, keeping up with all her friends and with every new fad and movement there, although she made fun of most of them.

玛吉天生聪明能干，她总是跑到城里，跟上她所有的朋友，了解那里的每一个新时尚和运动，尽管她取笑他们中的大多数人。

Twice she had taken her girls abroad.

她曾两次带女儿出国。

But Edith was quite different.

但伊迪丝却截然不同。

In a suburb she would draw into her house and never grow another inch.

在郊区，她会缩进自己的房子里，再也不会长出一英寸。

And Bruce, poor devil, would commute and take work home from the office.

布鲁斯，可怜的魔鬼，会上下班并从办公室把工作带回家。

But Roger couldn't tell her that.

但罗杰不能告诉她这些。

"I'd be sorry to see you do it," he said.

“看到你这么做我会很遗憾，”他说。

"I'd miss you up in the mountains."

“我在山上会想念你的。”

"Oh, we'd come up in the summer," she answered.

“哦，我们会在夏天来的，”她回答道。

"I wouldn't miss the mountains for worlds!"

“我永远都不会错过山脉！”

Then they talked of summer plans.

然后他们谈论了夏季计划。

And soon again Edith's smooth pretty brows were wrinkling absorbedly.

很快，伊迪丝光滑漂亮的眉毛又全神贯注地皱了起来。

It was hard in her planning not to be sure whether her new baby would come in May or early June.

在她的计划中，很难不确定她的新生儿是在五月还是六月初出生。

It was only the first of April now.

现在才四月初。

While she talked her father watched her.

当她说话时，父亲看着她。

He liked her quiet fearlessness in facing the ordeal ahead.

他喜欢她面对前方磨难时的安静无畏。

Into the bewildering city he felt her searching anxiously to find good things for her small brood, to make every dollar count, to keep their little bodies strong, to guard their hungry little souls from many things she thought were bad.

走进这座令人眼花缭乱的城市，他感觉到她焦急地寻找着，为她的小孩子们找到好东西，让每一块钱都物有所值，让他们小小的身体保持强壮，保护他们饥饿的小灵魂免受许多她认为不好的东西的侵害。

Of all his daughters, he told himself, she was the one most like his wife.

他告诉自己，在他所有的女儿中，她是最像他妻子的一个。

While she was talking Bruce came in.

正当她说话的时候，布鲁斯进来了。

Of medium height and a wiry build, his quick kindly smile of greeting did not conceal the fine tight lines about his mouth and between his eyes.

他中等身材，身材魁梧，打招呼时迅速亲切地微笑着，但并没有掩盖他嘴角和眼睛之间紧绷的细纹。

His small trim moustache was black, but his hair already showed streaks of gray although he was not quite thirty-eight, and as he lit a cigarette his right hand twitched perceptibly.

他修剪整齐的小胡子是黑色的，但虽然还不到三十八岁，头发却已显出几缕花白，点燃香烟时，右手明显地抽搐着。

Bruce Cunningham had married just after he left law school.

布鲁斯·坎宁安 (Bruce Cunningham) 离开法学院后不久就结婚了。

He had worked in a law office which took receiverships by the score, and through managing bankrupt concerns by slow degrees he had made himself a financial surgeon.

他曾在一家按分数接管破产的律师事务所工作，通过缓慢地管理破产公司，他使自己成为一名金融外科医生。

He had set up an office of his own and was doing splendidly.

他已经建立了自己的办公室，并且经营得非常出色。

But he worked under fearful tension.

但他在可怕的压力下工作。

Bruce had to deal with bankrupts who had barely closed their eyes for weeks, men half out of their minds from the strain, the struggle to keep up their heads in those angry waters of finance which Roger vaguely pictured as a giant whirlpool.

布鲁斯必须与几个星期以来几乎没有闭上眼睛的破产者打交道，这些人因压力而半昏迷，在愤怒的金融水域中挣扎着保持头脑，罗杰模糊地将其描绘成一个巨大的漩涡。

Though honest enough in his own affairs, Bruce showed a genial relish for all the tricks of the savage world which was as the breath to his nostrils.

尽管布鲁斯在自己的事情上足够诚实，但他对野蛮世界的所有诡计表现出一种和蔼可亲的兴趣，就像他鼻孔里的呼吸一样。

And at times he appeared so wise and keen he made Roger feel like a child.

有时他显得如此聪明和敏锐，让罗杰感觉自己像个孩子。

But again it was Bruce who seemed the child.

但布鲁斯再次显得像个孩子。

He seemed to be so naïve at times, and Edith had him so under her thumb.

他有时显得很天真，而伊迪丝却对他百依百顺。

Roger liked to hear Bruce's stories of business, when Edith would let her husband talk.

罗杰喜欢听布鲁斯讲商业故事，而伊迪丝则让她丈夫讲。

But this she would not often do, for she said Bruce needed rest at night.

但她并不经常这样做，因为她说布鲁斯晚上需要休息。

She reproved him now for staying so late, she wrung from him the fact that he'd had no supper.

她现在责备他呆得这么晚，并从他口中得知他没有吃晚饭。

"Well, Bruce," she exclaimed impatiently, "now isn't that just like you?

“好吧，布鲁斯，”她不耐烦地喊道，“这不正像你一样吗？

You're going straight home--that's where you're going--"

你要直接回家——那就是你要去的地方——”

"To be fed up and put to bed," her husband grumbled good-naturedly.

“受够了，就上床睡觉吧。”她丈夫善意地抱怨道。

And while she made ready to bundle him off he turned to his father-in-law.

当她准备把他捆起来时，他转向他的岳父。

"What do you think's my latest?" he asked, and he gave a low chuckle which Roger liked.

“你觉得我最新的是什么？”他问道，并低声笑了一声，罗杰很喜欢。

"Last week I was a brewer, to-day I'm an engineer," he said.

“上周我是一名酿酒师，今天我是一名工程师，”他说。

"Can you beat it?

“你能打败它吗？

A building contractor.

建筑承包商。

Me." And as he smoked his cigarette, in laconic phrases he explained how a huge steel construction concern had gone to the wall, through building skyscrapers "on spec" and outstripping even the growth of New York.

我。”当他抽烟时，他用简洁的语言解释了一个巨大的钢结构问题是如何通过“按规格”建造摩天大楼并超越纽约的增长而陷入困境的。

"They got into court last week," he said, "and the judge handed me the receivership.

“他们上周出庭，”他说，“法官把破产管理权交给了我。

The judge and I have been chums for years.

法官和我多年来一直是好朋友。

He has hay fever--so do I."

他有花粉症——我也有。”

"Come, Bruce, I'm ready," said his wife.

“来吧，布鲁斯，我准备好了，”他的妻子说。

"I've been in their office all day," he went on.

“我在他们的办公室待了一整天，”他继续说道。

"Their general manager was stark mad.

“他们的总经理非常生气。

He hadn't been out of the office since last Sunday night, he said.

他说，自从上周日晚上以来，他就没有离开过办公室。

You had to ask him a question and wait--while he looked at you and held onto his chair.

你必须问他一个问题，然后等待——他看着你，扶着椅子。

He broke down and blubbered--the poor damn fool--he'll be in Matteawan in a week--"

他崩溃了，哭了起来——这个可怜的该死的傻瓜——一周后他就会到马蒂旺——”

"You'll be there yourself if you don't come home," broke in Edith's voice impatiently.

“如果你不回家的话，你自己也会在那里。”伊迪丝不耐烦地插话道。

"And out of that poor devil, and out of the mess his books are in, I've been learning engineering!"

“为了摆脱那个可怜的魔鬼，摆脱他的书所带来的混乱，我一直在学习工程学！”

He had followed his wife out on the steps.

他跟着他的妻子走出了台阶。

He turned back with a quick appealing smile:

他转过身来，脸上带着迷人的微笑：

"Well, good-night--see you soon--"

“好吧，晚安——一会儿见——”

"Good-night, my boy," said Roger.

“晚安，我的孩子，”罗杰说。

"Good luck to the engineering."

“祝工程好运。”

"Oh, father dear," cried Edith, from the taxi down below.

“哦，亲爱的爸爸，”伊迪丝在下面的出租车里喊道。

"Remember supper Sunday night--"

“记得周日晚上的晚餐——”

"I won't forget," said Roger.

“我不会忘记，”罗杰说。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

He watched them start off up the street.

他看着他们沿着街道出发。

The night was soft, refreshing, and the place was quiet and personal.

夜晚柔和、清爽，这个地方安静而私密。

The house was one of a dozen others, some of red brick and some of brown stone, that stood in an uneven row on a street but a few rods in length, one side of a little triangular park enclosed by a low iron fence, inside of which were a few gnarled trees and three or four park benches.

这栋房子是其他十几栋房子之一，有些是红砖的，有些是棕色石头的，在街上参差不齐地排成一排，但长度只有几杆，一侧是一个小三角形公园，周围有一道低矮的铁栅栏，里面有几棵粗糙的树和三四个公园长椅。

On one of these benches his eye was caught by the figure of an old woman there, and he stood a moment watching her, some memory stirring in his mind.

在其中一张长凳上，他的目光被一位老妇人的身影吸引住了，他站了一会儿看着她，一些记忆在他的脑海中激起。

Occasionally somebody passed.

偶尔有人经过。

Otherwise it was silent here.

否则这里就寂静无声了。

But even in the silence could be felt the throes of change; the very atmosphere seemed charged with drastic things impending.

但即使在寂静中，也能感受到变化的阵痛；气氛似乎充满了即将发生的剧烈事件。

Already the opposite house line had been broken near the center by a high apartment building, and another still higher rose like a cliff just back of the house in which Roger lived.

对面的房屋线已经在中心附近被一栋高高的公寓楼打破了，另一座更高的公寓楼就在罗杰住的房子后面，像悬崖一样耸立。

Still others, and many factory lofts, reared shadowy bulks on every hand.

还有一些人，以及许多工厂的阁楼，到处都饲养着阴暗的大块动物。

From the top of one an enormous sign, a corset pictured forth in lights, flashed out at regular intervals; and from farther off, high up in the misty haze of the night, could be seen the gleaming pinnacle where hour by hour that great bell slowly boomed the time away.

其中一个的顶部有一个巨大的标志，在灯光下描绘出一件紧身胸衣，每隔一段时间就会闪现出来；从更远的地方，在夜色的薄雾中，可以看到闪闪发光的尖峰，那里的大钟一小时一小时地慢慢地敲响着时间。

Yes, here the old was passing.

是的，旧人正在这里逝去。

Already the tiny parklet was like the dark bottom of a pit, with the hard sparkling modern town towering on every side, slowly pressing, pressing in and glaring down with yellow eyes.

小公园已经像一个黑暗的坑底了，四周都是坚硬闪闪发光的现代城镇，慢慢地压着，压着，用黄色的眼睛向下瞪着。

But Roger noticed none of these things.

但罗杰没有注意到这些事情。

He watched the old woman on the bench and groped for the memory she had stirred.

他看着长凳上的老妇人，摸索着她激起的记忆。

Ah, now at last he had it.

啊，现在他终于得到了。

An April night long, long ago, when he had sat where she was now, while here in the house his wife's first baby, Edith, had begun her life....

很久很久以前的一个四月的夜晚，当他坐在她现在所在的地方时，他妻子的第一个孩子伊迪丝已经在家里开始了她的生活……

Slowly he turned and went inside.

他慢慢地转身走了进去。

CHAPTER II

第二章

Roger's hearing was extremely acute.

罗杰的听力极其敏锐。

Though the room where he was sitting, his study, was at the back of the house, he heard Deborah's key at the street door and he heard the door softly open and close.

虽然他坐的房间，即他的书房，在房子的后面，但他听到黛博拉把钥匙放在临街的门口，也听到门轻轻地打开和关闭。

"Are you there, dearie?" Her voice from the hallway was low; and his answer, "Yes, child," was in the same tone, as though she were with him in the room.

“亲爱的，你在吗？”走廊里传来她的声音很低。他用同样的语气回答：“是的，孩子。”就好像她和他一起在房间里一样。

This keen sense of hearing had long been a peculiar bond between them.

这种敏锐的听觉早已成为他们之间一种奇特的纽带。

To her father, Deborah's voice was the most distinctive part of her, for often as he listened the memory came of her voice as a girl, unpleasant, hurried and stammering.

对她的父亲来说，黛博拉的声音是她身上最独特的部分，因为他常常会想起她还是个女孩时的声音，令人不快、匆忙、结结巴巴。

But she had overcome all that.

但她已经克服了这一切。

"No grown woman," she had declared, when she was eighteen, "has any excuse for a voice like mine." That was eleven years ago; and the voice she had acquired since, with its sweet magnetic quality, its clear and easy articulation, was to him an expression of Deborah's growth.

“没有一个成年女性，”她十八岁时宣称，“没有任何理由拥有像我这样的声音。”那是十一年前的事了；从那时起，她的声音甜美而富有磁性，发音清晰而轻松，对他来说，这是黛博拉成长的表现。

As she took off her coat and hat in the hall she said, in the same low tone as before,

当她在大厅里脱下外套和帽子时，她用一如既往的低声说道：

"Edith has been here, I suppose--"

“伊迪丝一直在这里，我想——”

"Yes--"

“是的——”

"I'm so sorry I missed her.

“我很抱歉我错过了她。

I tried to get home early, but it has been a busy night."

我试图早点回家，但这真是一个忙碌的夜晚。”

Her voice sounded tired, comfortably so, and she looked that way as she came in.

她的声音听起来很疲倦，但很舒服，她进来时也是这个样子。

Though only a little taller than Edith, she was of a sturdier build and more decided features.

虽然只比伊迪丝高一点点，但她的体格更健壮，五官也更坚毅。

Her mouth was large with a humorous droop and her face rather broad with high cheekbones.

她的嘴很大，幽默地下垂，脸很宽，颧骨很高。

As she put her soft black hair up over her high forehead, her father noticed her birthmark, a faint curving line of red running up from between her eyes.

当她把柔软的黑发盘在高高的额头上时，她的父亲注意到了她的胎记，一条淡淡的红色曲线从她的眼睛之间延伸出来。

Imperceptible as a rule, it showed when she was tired.

通常不易察觉，当她累了的时候就会表现出来。

In the big school in the tenements where she had taught for many years, she gave herself hard without stint to her work, but she had such a good time through it all.

在她教书多年的公寓里的大学校里，她不辞劳苦地工作，却过得很开心。

She had a way, too, he reflected, of always putting things in their place.

他想，她也有办法总是把东西放回原处。

As now she came in and kissed him and sank back on his leather lounge with a tranquil breath of relief, she seemed to be dropping school out of her life.

现在她进来亲吻了他，坐回他的皮革躺椅上，平静地松了口气，她似乎正在从生活中放弃学业。

Roger picked up his paper and continued his reading.

罗杰拿起报纸，继续阅读。

Presently they would have a talk, but first he knew that she wanted to lie quite still for a little while.

很快他们就要谈谈了，但首先他知道她想静静地躺一会儿。

Vaguely he pictured her work that night, her class-room packed to bursting with small Jews and Italians, and Deborah at the blackboard with a long pointer in her hand.

他模糊地想象着她那天晚上的工作，教室里挤满了小犹太人和意大利人，黛博拉站在黑板上，手里拿着一根长长的教鞭。

The fact that for the last two years she had been the principal of her school had made little impression upon him.

在过去的两年里，她一直担任学校的校长，这一事实并没有给他留下什么印象。

And meanwhile, as she lay back with eyes closed, her mind still taut from the evening called up no simple class-room but far different places--a mass meeting in Carnegie Hall where she had just been speaking, some schools which she had visited out in Indiana, a block of tenements far downtown and the private office of the mayor.

与此同时，当她闭着眼睛躺下来时，她的思绪因晚上而仍然绷紧，召唤的不是简单的教室，而是截然不同的地方——她刚刚演讲的卡内基音乐厅的一次群众集会，她在印第安纳州参观过的一些学校，远离市中心的一个公寓楼和市长的私人办公室。

For her school had long curious arms these days.

因为她的学校现在有长长的好奇手臂。

"Was Bruce here too this evening?" she asked her father presently.

“今晚布鲁斯也在这里吗？”她立刻问她的父亲。

Roger finished what he was reading, then looked over to the lounge, which was in a shadowy corner.

罗杰读完了他正在读的内容，然后看向位于阴暗角落的休息室。

"Yes, he came in late." And he went on to tell her of Bruce's "engineering." At once she was interested.

“是啊，他来晚了。”他接着告诉她布鲁斯的“工程”。她立刻感兴趣了。

Rising on one elbow she questioned him good-humoredly, for Deborah was fond of Bruce.

她用一只手肘站起来，幽默地询问他，因为黛博拉很喜欢布鲁斯。

"Has he bought that automobile he wanted?"

“他买了他想要的那辆车了吗？”

"No," replied her father.

“不，”她父亲回答道。

"Edith said they couldn't afford it."

“伊迪丝说他们买不起。”

"Why not?"

“为什么不呢？”

"This time it's the dentist's bills.

“这次是牙医的账单。

Young Betsy's teeth aren't straightened yet--and as soon as she's been beautified they're going to put the clamps on George."

小贝特西的牙齿还没有矫正——等她美容完毕，他们就会给乔治夹上牙夹。”

"Poor Georgie," Deborah murmured.

“可怜的乔吉，”黛博拉低声说道。

At the look of pain and disapproval on her father's heavy face, she smiled quietly to herself.

看着父亲那张沉重的脸上痛苦和不以为然的表情，她默默地对自己笑了笑。

George, who was Edith's oldest and the worry of her days, was Roger's favorite grandson.

乔治是伊迪丝最年长的孩子，也是她一生的牵挂，也是罗杰最喜欢的孙子。

"Has he been bringing home any more sick dogs?"

“他还带了更多生病的狗回家吗？”

"No, this time it was a rat--a white one," Roger answered.

“不，这次是一只老鼠——一只白色的老鼠，”罗杰回答道。

A glint of dry relish appeared in his eyes.

他眼中闪过一丝干涩的津津有味。

"George brought it home the other night.

“乔治那天晚上把它带回家。

He had on a pair of ragged old pants."

他穿着一条破烂的旧裤子。”

"What on earth--"

“到底是什么——”

"He had traded his own breeches for the rat," said Roger placidly.

“他用自己的马裤换了老鼠，”罗杰平静地说。

"No!

“不！

Oh, father!

噢，父亲！

Really!" And she sank back laughing on the lounge.

真的！”她在休息室里大笑起来。

"His school report," said Roger, "was quite as bad as ever."

“他的成绩单，”罗杰说，“和以前一样糟糕。”

"Of course it was," said Deborah.

“当然是这样，”黛博拉说。

And she spoke so sharply that her father glanced at her in surprise.

而且她说话的语气如此尖锐，让她的父亲惊讶地看了她一眼。

She was up again on one elbow, and there was an eager expression on her bright attractive face.

她又用一只胳膊肘站了起来，那张明亮而迷人的脸上露出了渴望的表情。

"Do you know what we're going to do some day?

“你知道有一天我们要做什么吗？

We're going to put the rat in the school," Deborah said impatiently.

我们要把老鼠关进学校。”黛博拉不耐烦地说。

"We're going to take a boy like George and study him till we think we know just what interests him most.

“我们要带一个像乔治这样的男孩来研究他，直到我们认为我们知道他最感兴趣的是什么。

And if in his case it's animals, we'll have a regular zoo in school.

如果对他来说是动物，我们学校里就会有一个普通的动物园。

And for other boys we'll have other things they really want to know about.

对于其他男孩，我们还会提供他们真正想知道的其他事情。

And we'll keep them until five o'clock--when their mothers will have to drag them away." Her father looked bewildered.

我们会把他们留到五点钟——到时候他们的母亲就得把他们拖走。”她的父亲看上去很困惑。

"But arithmetic, my dear."

“但是算术，亲爱的。”

"You'll find they'll have learned their arithmetic without knowing it," Deborah answered.

“你会发现他们在不知不觉中就学会了算术，”黛博拉回答道。

"Sounds a bit wild," murmured Roger.

“听起来有点疯狂，”罗杰低声说道。

Again to his mind came the picture of hordes of little Italians and Jews.

他的脑海中再次浮现出成群结队的小意大利人和犹太人的画面。

"My dear, if I had _your children_ to teach, I don't think I'd add a zoo," he said.

“亲爱的，如果我要教你的孩子，我想我不会添加动物园，”他说。

And with a breath of discomfort he turned back to his reading.

他不安地吸了一口气，又继续看书。

He knew that he ought to question her, to show an interest in her work.

他知道他应该询问她，以表现出对她工作的兴趣。

But he had a deep aversion for those millions of foreign tenement people, always shoving, shoving upward through the filth of their surroundings.

但他对那些数以百万计的外国公寓人怀有深深的厌恶，他们总是在肮脏的环境中推搡、向上推。

They had already spoiled his neighborhood, they had flowed up like an ocean tide.

他们已经破坏了他的邻居，他们像海潮一样涌上来。

And so he read his paper, frowning guiltily down at the page.

于是他读了他的论文，愧疚地皱着眉头看着页面。

He glanced up in a little while and saw Deborah smiling across at him, reading his dislike of such talk.

过了一会儿，他抬起头，看见黛博拉对着他微笑，看出他不喜欢这样的谈话。

The smile which he sent back at her was half apologetic, half an appeal for mercy.

他对她回以微笑，一半是歉意，一半是求饶。

And Deborah seemed to understand.

黛博拉似乎明白了。

She went into the living room, and there at the piano she was soon playing softly.

她走进客厅，钢琴很快就开始轻柔地弹奏起来。

Listening from his study, again the feeling came to him of her fresh and abundant vitality.

书房里听着，他再次感受到她清新而充沛的生命力。

He mused a little enviously on how it must feel to be strong like that, never really tired.

他有点羡慕地想，像这样坚强，从不真正感到疲倦一定是一种什么样的感觉。

And while her father thought in this wise, Deborah at the piano, leaning back with eyes half closed, could feel her tortured nerves relax, could feel her pulse stop throbbing so and the dull aching at her temples little by little pass away.

当她的父亲这样想的时候，德博拉在钢琴前靠在椅背上，半闭着眼睛，可以感觉到她受折磨的神经放松了，可以感觉到她的脉搏停止了跳动，太阳穴的隐隐作痛一点点消失了。

She played like this so many nights.

她这样玩了很多个夜晚。

Soon she would be ready for sleep.

很快她就准备睡觉了。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

After she had gone to bed, Roger rose heavily from his chair.

她上床睡觉后，罗杰重重地从椅子上站了起来。

By long habit he went about the house trying the windows and turning out lights.

按照长期的习惯，他在房子里走来走去，检查窗户，关掉灯。

Last he came to the front door.

最后他来到了前门。

There were double outer doors with a ponderous system of locks and bolts and a heavy chain.

有两扇外门，配有笨重的锁、插销系统和沉重的链条。

Mechanically he fastened them all; and putting out the light in the hall, in the darkness he went up the stairs.

他机械地将它们全部固定起来；他关掉了大厅里的灯，在黑暗中走上楼梯。

He could so easily feel his way.

他很容易就能摸索到自己的路。

He put his hand lightly, first on the foot of the banister, then on a curve in it halfway up, again on the sharper curve at the top and last on the knob of his bedroom door.

他轻轻地把手放在栏杆脚上，然后放在栏杆中间的一个曲线上，再放在顶部较尖锐的曲线上，最后放在卧室门的把手上。

And it was as though these guiding objects came out to meet him like old friends.

这些引导物就像老朋友一样出来迎接他。

In his bedroom, while he slowly undressed, his glance was caught by the picture upon the wall opposite his bed, a little landscape poster done in restful tones of blue, of two herdsmen and their cattle far up on a mountainside in the hour just before the dawn, tiny clear-cut silhouettes against the awakening eastern sky.

在他的卧室里，当他慢慢地脱衣服时，他的目光被床对面墙上的照片吸引了，那是一张用宁静的蓝色调绘制的小风景海报，黎明前的一个小时，两个牧民和他们的牛群在遥远的山坡上，在东方苏醒的天空的衬托下，微小而清晰的剪影。

So immense and still, this birth of the day--the picture always gave him the feeling of life everlasting.

如此巨大而宁静，这一天的诞生——这幅画总是给他一种生命永恒的感觉。

Judith his wife had placed it there.

他的妻子朱迪思把它放在那里。

From his bed through the window close beside him he looked up at the cliff-like wall of the new apartment building, with tier upon tier of windows from which murmurous voices dropped out of the dark: now soft, now suddenly angry, loud; now droning, sullen, bitter, hard; now gay with little screams of mirth; now low and amorous, drowsy sounds.

他从床上透过靠近他身边的窗户抬头望着新公寓楼悬崖般的墙壁，一层又一层的窗户，从黑暗中传出低沉的声音：时而轻柔，时而突然愤怒，大声；现在嗡嗡作响，闷闷不乐，痛苦，严厉；现在欢快地发出小声的欢笑；现在声音低沉、多情、昏昏欲睡。

Tier upon tier of modern homes, all overhanging Roger's house as though presently to crush it down.

一层又一层的现代住宅，全部悬在罗杰的房子上方，仿佛即将将其压垮。

But Roger was not thinking of that.

但罗杰并没有想到这一点。

He was thinking of his children--of Edith's approaching confinement and all her anxious hunting about to find what was best for her family, of Bruce and the way he was driving himself in the unnatural world downtown where men were at each other's throats, of Deborah and that school of hers in the heart of a vast foul region of tenement buildings swarming with strange, dirty little urchins.

他想到了他的孩子们——想到伊迪丝即将入狱，她焦急地寻找对家人最好的办法；想到布鲁斯，想到他在市中心那个非自然的世界里驾车行驶，男人们互相掐架；想到黛博拉和她所在的学校，那所学校位于一片肮脏的公寓楼中心，那里挤满了奇怪、肮脏的小顽童。

And last he thought of Laura, his youngest daughter, wild as a hawk, gadding about the Lord knew where.

最后他想起了他最小的女儿劳拉，她像鹰一样狂野，天知道在哪里闲逛。

She even danced in restaurants!

她甚至在餐馆里跳舞！

Through his children he felt flowing into his house the seething life of this new town.

通过他的孩子们，他感受到这个新城镇的热闹生活正在流入他的家。

And drowsily he told himself he must make a real effort, and make it soon, to know his family better.

他昏昏欲睡地告诉自己，他必须付出真正的努力，而且要尽快做到，以便更好地了解他的家人。

For in spite of the storm of long ago which had swept away his faith in God, the feeling had come to him of late that somewhere, in some manner, he was to meet his wife again.

尽管很久以前的暴风雨已经摧毁了他对上帝的信仰，但最近他却有一种感觉，他将在某个地方、以某种方式再次见到他的妻子。

He rarely tried to think this out, for as soon as he did it became a mere wish, a hungry longing, nothing more.

他很少尝试去思考这个问题，因为一旦他这样做了，它就变成了一个单纯的愿望，一种饥饿的渴望，仅此而已。

So he had learned to let it lie, deep down inside of him.

所以他学会了让它躺在他内心深处。

Sometimes he vividly saw her face.

有时他清晰地看到她的脸。

After all, who could tell?

毕竟，谁能说得清呢？

And she would want to hear of her children.

她也想听听她孩子们的消息。

Yes, he must know them better.

是的，他必须更了解他们。

Some day soon he must begin.

不久的将来，他必须开始。

Suddenly he remembered that Laura had not yet come home.

突然他想起劳拉还没有回家。

With a sigh of discomfort he got out of bed and went downstairs, re-lit the gas in the hallway, unfastened the locks and the chain at the door.

他不安地叹了口气，下了床，下了楼，重新点燃了走廊里的煤气灯，解开了门上的锁和链条。

He came back and was soon asleep.

他回来了，很快就睡着了。

He must have dozed for an hour or two.

他肯定睡了一两个小时。

He was roused by hearing the front door close and a big motor thundering.

他被前门关上的声音和大型发动机的轰鸣声惊醒。

And then like a flash of light in the dark came Laura's rippling laughter.

然后劳拉的笑声就像黑暗中的一道闪光传来。

CHAPTER III

第三章

On the next evening, Saturday, while Roger ate his dinner, Laura came to sit with him.

第二天晚上，星期六，罗杰吃晚饭时，劳拉过来和他坐在一起。

She herself was dining out.

她自己正在外面吃饭。

That she should have dressed so early in order to keep him company had caused her father some surprise, and a faint suspicion entered his mind that she had overdrawn at the bank, as she had the last time she sat with him like this.

为了陪伴他，她竟然这么早穿好衣服，这让父亲有些惊讶，他心里隐约怀疑她在银行透支了，就像上次和他坐在一起一样。

Her manner certainly was a bit strange.

她的态度确实有点奇怪。

But Roger put the thought aside.

但罗杰把这个想法放在一边。

Whatever she wanted, Laura was worth it.

无论她想要什么，劳拉都是值得的。

In a tingling fashion he felt what a glorious time she was having, what a gorgeous town she knew.

他以一种刺痛的方式感受到她正在度过多么美好的时光，她所知道的这座小镇是多么美丽。

It was difficult to realize she was his own daughter, this dashing stranger sitting here, playing idly with a knife and caressing him with her voice and her eyes.

很难意识到她是他自己的女儿，这个风度翩翩的陌生人坐在这里，闲着玩着刀，用声音和眼睛爱抚着他。

The blue evening gown she was wearing to-night (doubtless not yet paid for) made her figure even more supple and lithe, set off her splendid bosom, her slender neck, her creamy skin.

今晚她穿的蓝色晚礼服（无疑还没有付钱）让她的身材显得更加的柔美，衬托着她的丰胸，纤细的脖颈，奶油般的肌肤。

Her hair, worn low over her temples, was brown with just a tinge of red.

她的头发低垂在太阳穴上，呈棕色，略带红色。

Her eyes were black, with gleaming lights; her lips were warm and rich, alive.

她的眼睛是黑色的，闪烁着光芒；她的嘴唇温暖而丰润，充满活力。

He did not approve of her lips.

他不赞成她的嘴唇。

Once when she had kissed him Roger had started slightly back.

有一次，当她亲吻他时，罗杰稍微向后退了一步。

For his daughter's lips were rouged, and they had reminded him of his youth.

因为他女儿的嘴唇涂着胭脂，这让他想起了自己的青春。

He had asked her sister to speak to her.

他请她姐姐和她说话。

But Deborah had told him she did not care to speak to people in that way--"especially women--especially sisters," she had said, with a quiet smile.

但黛博拉告诉他，她不想以这种方式与人交谈——“尤其是女人——尤其是姐妹们，”她平静地微笑着说道。

All very well, he reflected, but somebody ought to take Laura in hand.

一切都很好，他想，但应该有人牵着劳拉。

She had been his favorite as a child, his pet, his tiny daughter.

她是他小时候最喜欢的人，他的宠物，他的小女儿。

He remembered her on his lap like a kitten.

他记得她像一只小猫一样躺在他的腿上。

How she had liked to cuddle there.

她多么喜欢依偎在那里。

And she had liked to bite his hand, a curious habit in a child.

她还喜欢咬他的手，这对孩子来说是一种奇怪的习惯。

"I hurt daddy!" He could still recollect the gay little laugh with which she said that, looking up brightly into his face.

“我伤害了爸爸！”他仍然记得她说这句话时的欢快的笑声，明亮地抬头看着他的脸。

And here she was already grown, and like a light in the sober old house, fascinating while she disturbed him.

在这里，她已经长大了，就像这栋朴素的老房子里的一盏灯，在她打扰他的同时仍然迷人。

He liked to hear her high pitched voice, gossiping in Deborah's room or in her own dainty chamber chatting with the adoring maid who was dressing her to go out.

他喜欢听她高亢的声音，在黛博拉的房间里或在她自己精致的房间里与正在给她穿衣服准备出门的可爱女仆聊天。

He loved her joyous thrilling laugh.

他喜欢她那令人愉悦、惊心动魄的笑声。

And he would have missed her from the house as he would have missed Fifth Avenue if it had been dropped from the city.

他会在房子里想念她，就像如果第五大道从城里掉下来他也会想念第五大道一样。

For the picture Roger had formed of this daughter was more of a symbol than of a girl, a symbol of the ardent town, spending, wasting, dancing mad.

因为罗杰对这个女儿的印象与其说是一个女孩，不如说是一个象征，是这座热情的小镇的象征，挥霍、挥霍、疯狂跳舞。

It was Laura who had kept him living right up to his income.

是劳拉让他的收入维持生计。

"Where are you dining to-night?" he asked.

“今天晚上去哪里吃饭？”他问道。

"With the Raymonds." He wondered who they were.

“和雷蒙德一家。”他想知道他们是谁。

"Oh, Sarah," she added to the maid.

“哦，莎拉，”她对女仆补充道。

"Call up Mrs. Raymond's apartment and ask what time is dinner to-night."

“给雷蒙德太太的公寓打电话，问问今晚几点吃晚饭。”

"Are you going to dance later on?" he inquired.

“你一会儿要跳舞吗？”他问道。

"Oh, I guess so," she replied.

“哦，我想是的，”她回答道。

"On the Astor Roof, I think they said--"

“在阿斯特屋顶上，我想他们说——”

Her father went on with his dinner.

她父亲继续吃晚饭。

These hotel dances, he had heard, ran well into Sunday morning.

他听说，这些酒店的舞会一直持续到周日早上。

How Judith would have disapproved.

朱迪思一定会不同意的。

He hesitated uneasily.

他不安地犹豫着。

"I don't especially care for this dancing into Sunday," he said.

“我不太喜欢在周日跳舞，”他说。

For a moment he did not look up from his plate.

他有一会儿没有从盘子上抬起头来。

When he did he saw Laura regarding him.

当他这样做时，他看到劳拉正在看着他。

"Oh, do you mind?

“哦，你介意吗？

I'm sorry.

对不起。

I won't, after this," she answered.

以后我不会了，”她回答道。

And Roger colored angrily, for the glint of amusement in Laura's mischievous black eyes revealed quite unmistakably that she regarded both her father and his feeling for the Sabbath as very dear and quaint and old.

罗杰的脸色生气了，因为劳拉淘气的黑眼睛里闪烁着有趣的光芒，毫无疑问地表明，她认为她的父亲和他对安息日的感情都非常亲切、古雅和古老。

Old?

老的？

Of course he seemed old to _her_, Roger thought indignantly.

当然，在她看来，他看起来很老，罗杰愤怒地想。

For what was Laura but a child?

劳拉除了还是个孩子之外，还有什么意义呢？

Did she ever think of anything except having a good time?

除了开心之外，她还想过别的吗？

Had she ever stopped to think out her own morals, let alone anyone else's?

她有没有停下来思考过自己的道德观，更不用说其他人的道德观了？

Was she any judge of what was old--or of _who_ was old?

她能判断什么是旧的——或者谁是旧的吗？

And he determined then and there to show her he was in his prime.

他当时就决定向她展示他正处于巅峰时期。

Impatiently he strove to remember the names of her friends and ask her about them, to show a keen lively interest in this giddy gaddy life she led.

他不耐烦地努力记住她朋友的名字，并向她询问他们的情况，以对她过着的这种令人眼花缭乱的生活表现出浓厚的兴趣。

And when that was rather a failure he tried his daughter next on books, books of the most modern kind.

当这相当失败时，他接下来尝试让女儿读书，最现代的书籍。

Stoutly he lied and said he was reading a certain Russian novel of which he had heard Deborah speak.

他坚决撒谎说他正在读一本他听黛博拉讲过的俄罗斯小说。

But this valiant falsehood made no impression whatever, for Laura had never heard of the book.

但这种大胆的谎言并没有给人留下任何印象，因为劳拉从未听说过这本书。

"I get so little time for reading," she murmured.

“我读书的时间太少了，”她低声说道。

And meanwhile she was thinking, "As soon as he finishes talking, poor dear, I'll break the news."

与此同时，她在想：“可怜的亲爱的，一旦他说完，我就会宣布这个消息。”

Then Roger had an audacious thought.

然后罗杰有了一个大胆的想法。

He would take her to a play, by George!

他会带她去看乔治的戏剧！

Mustering his courage he led up to it by speaking of a play Deborah had seen, a full-fledged modern drama all centered upon the right of a woman "to lead her own life." And as he outlined the story, he saw he had caught his daughter's attention.

他鼓起勇气，谈到了黛博拉看过的一部戏剧，这是一部成熟的现代戏剧，一切都以女性“过自己的生活”的权利为中心。当他概述这个故事时，他发现自己已经引起了女儿的注意。

With her pretty chin resting on one hand, watching him and listening, she appeared much older, and she seemed suddenly close to him.

她一只手撑着漂亮的下巴，看着他，听着，显得苍老了许多，而且似乎突然离他很近。

"How would you like to go with me and see it some evening?" he inquired.

“你愿意找个晚上和我一起去看看吗？”他问道。

"See what, my love?" she asked him, her thoughts plainly far away; and he looked at her in astonishment:

“看到什么了吗，亲爱的？”她问他，她的思绪显然已经很遥远了。他惊讶地看着她：

"That play I've just been speaking of!"

“我刚才说的那出戏！”

"Why, daddy, I'd love to!" she exclaimed.

“为什么，爸爸，我很乐意！”她惊呼道。

"When?" he asked.

“什么时候？”他问道。

And he fixed a night.

他定了一个晚上。

He was proud of himself.

他为自己感到骄傲。

Eagerly he began to talk of opening nights at Wallack's.

他急切地开始谈论瓦莱克酒吧的开幕之夜。

Roger and Judith, when they were young, had been great first nighters there.

罗杰和朱迪思年轻时，在那里的第一个晚上过得很愉快。

And now it was Laura who drew him out, and as he talked on she seemed to him to be smilingly trying to picture it all....

现在是劳拉把他拉出来了，当他继续说话时，他似乎在微笑着试图想象这一切……

"Now I'd better tell him," she thought.

“现在我最好告诉他，”她想。

"Do you remember Harold Sloane?" she asked a little strangely.

“你还记得哈罗德·斯隆吗？”她有些奇怪地问道。

"No," replied her father, a bit annoyed at the interruption.

“不，”她父亲回答道，对这种打扰感到有点恼火。

"Why--you've met him two or three times--"

“为什么——你已经见过他两三次了——”

"Have I?" The queer note in her voice made him look up.

“我有吗？”她声音中的奇怪语气让他抬起头来。

Laura had risen from her chair.

劳拉从椅子上站了起来。

"I want you to know him--very soon." There was a moment's silence.

“我想让你认识他——很快。”一阵沉默。

"I'm going to marry him, dad," she said.

“我要嫁给他，爸爸，”她说。

And Roger looked at her blankly.

罗杰茫然地看着她。

He felt his limbs beginning to tremble.

他感觉自己的四肢开始颤抖。

"I've been waiting to tell you when we were alone," she added in an awkward tone.

“我一直在等着我们单独在一起的时候告诉你，”她用一种尴尬的语气补充道。

And still staring up at her he felt a rush of tenderness and a pang of deep remorse.

他仍然抬头看着她，感到一阵温柔和一阵深深的悔恨。

Laura in love and settled for life!

劳拉坠入爱河并安定终身！

And what did he know of the affair?

他对这件事了解多少？

What had he ever done for her?

他到底为她做过什么？

Too late!

为时已晚！

He had begun too late!

他开始得太晚了！

And this rush of emotion was so overpowering that while he still looked at her blindly she was the first to recover her poise.

这种激动的情绪如此强烈，以至于当他仍然盲目地看着她时，她是第一个恢复平静的。

She came around the table and kissed him softly on the cheek.

她绕过桌子，轻轻地吻了一下他的脸颊。

And now more than ever Roger felt how old his daughter thought him.

现在罗杰比以往任何时候都更能感觉到他的女儿认为他有多大。

"Who is he?" he asked hoarsely.

“他是谁？”他嘶哑地问道。

And she answered smiling,

她微笑着回答说：

"A perfectly nice young man named Sloane."

“一个非常好的年轻人，名叫斯隆。”

"Don't, Laura--tell me!

“别这样，劳拉——告诉我！

What does he do?"

他是做什么的？”

"He's in a broker's office--junior member of the firm, Oh, you needn't worry, dear, he can even afford to marry _me_."

“他在经纪人办公室——公司的初级成员，哦，你不用担心，亲爱的，他甚至有能力娶我。”

They heard a ring at the front door.

他们听到前门响起铃声。

"There he is now, I think," she said.

“我想他现在就在那里，”她说。

"Will you see him?

“你会见他吗？

Would you mind?"

你介意吗？”

"See him?

“看到他了吗？

No!" her father cried.

不！”她父亲哭了。

"But just to shake hands," she insisted.

“但只是握手，”她坚持说。

"You needn't talk or say a word.

“你不需要说话或说一句话。

We've only a moment, anyway." And she went swiftly out of the room.

无论如何，我们只有一会儿的时间。”而她也快步走出了房间。

Roger rose in a panic and strode up and down.

罗杰惊慌地站起来，大步走来。

Before he could recover himself she was back with her man, or rather her boy--for the fellow, to her father's eyes, looked ridiculously young.

在他回过神来之前，她又回到了她的男人身边，或者更确切地说，是她的儿子身边——因为这个家伙，在她父亲的眼里，看起来年轻得可笑。

Straight as an arrow, slender, his dress suit irreproachable, the chap nevertheless was more than a dandy.

笔直如箭，身材苗条，西装无可挑剔，但这小伙子不仅仅是一个花花公子。

He looked hard, as though he trained, and his smooth and ruddy face had a look of shrewd self-reliance.

他看上去很努力，就像是经过训练一样，光滑红润的脸上透着精明自立的神情。

So much of him Roger fathomed in the indignant cornered glance with which he welcomed him into the room.

罗杰在欢迎他进入房间时用愤怒的斜视一瞥，了解了他的很多情况。

"Why, good evening, Mr. Gale--glad to see you again, sir!" Young Sloane nervously held out his hand.

“嘿，晚上好，盖尔先生——很高兴再次见到你，先生！”年轻的斯隆紧张地伸出了手。

Roger took it and muttered something.

罗杰接过它，咕哝了一句什么。

For several moments, his mind in a whirl, he heard their talk and laughter and his own voice joining in.

有好一会儿，他的思绪一片混乱，他听到他们的谈话和笑声，还有他自己的声音加入进来。

Laura seemed enjoying herself, her eyes brimming with amusement over both her victims.

劳拉似乎很享受，她的眼睛里充满了对她的受害者的兴趣。

But at last she had compassion, kissed her father gaily and took her suitor out of the room.

但最后她怜悯了她，愉快地吻了她的父亲，并带着她的追求者走出了房间。

Soon Roger heard them leave the house.

很快罗杰听到他们离开房子的声音。

He went into his study, savagely bit off a cigar and gripped his evening paper as though he meant to choke it.

他走进书房，野蛮地咬掉一根雪茄，紧握着晚报，仿佛要把它掐死。

The maid came in with coffee.

女仆端着咖啡走了进来。

"Coffee?

“咖啡？

No!" he snapped at her.

不！”他对她厉声说道。

A few moments later he came to his senses and found himself smoking fast and hard.

过了一会儿，他回过神来，发现自己抽烟得又快又狠。

He heartily damned this fellow Sloane for breaking into the family and asking poor Laura to risk her whole life--just for his own selfish pleasure, his whim!

他衷心谴责斯隆这个家伙闯入这个家庭，让可怜的劳拉冒着生命危险——只是为了他自己的自私享乐，他的突发奇想！

Yes, "whim" was the very word for it!

是的，“突发奇想”就是这个词！

Laura's attitude, too!

劳拉的态度也是！

Did she look at it seriously?

她认真看了吗？

Not at all!

一点也不！

Quite plainly she saw her career as one long Highland fling and dance, with this Harry boy as her partner!

很明显，她把自己的职业生涯视为一场漫长的高地狂欢和舞蹈，而这个哈利男孩就是她的舞伴！

Who had he danced with in his past?

他过去和谁跳舞过？

The fellow's past must be gone into, and at once, without delay!

必须立即查明这个家伙的过去，不能拖延！

Here indeed was a jolt for Roger Gale, a pretty shabby trick of fate.

这对罗杰·盖尔来说确实是一个震动，这是命运的一个相当卑鄙的玩笑。

This was not what he had planned, this was a little way life had of jabbing a man with surprises.

这不是他所计划的，这只是生活给男人带来惊喜的一种小方式。

For months he had been slowly and comfortably feeling his way into the lives of his children, patiently, conscientiously.

几个月来，他一直在耐心、认真地慢慢、舒适地摸索着进入孩子们的生活。

But now without a word of warning in popped this young whipper-snapper, turning the whole house upside down!

但现在，这个年轻的自吹自擂者在没有任何警告的情况下突然出现，把整个房子翻了个底朝天！

Another young person to be known, another life to be dug into, and with pick and shovel too!

另一个有待认识的年轻人，另一个有待挖掘的生活，还有镐和铲子！

The job was far from pleasant.

这份工作远非令人愉快。

Would Deborah help him?

黛博拉会帮助他吗？

Not at all.

一点也不。

She believed in letting people alone--a devilish easy philosophy!

她相信不要打扰别人——这是一种简单而邪恶的哲学！

Still, he wanted to tell her at once, if only to stir her up a bit.

不过，他还是想立刻告诉她，哪怕只是为了让她兴奋一点。

He did not propose to bear this alone!

他不打算独自承受这一切！

But Deborah was out to-night.

但黛博拉今晚出去了。

Why must she always be out, he asked, in that infernal zoo school?

他问道，为什么她必须总是呆在那个地狱般的动物园学校里？

But no, it was not school to-night.

但不，今晚不是学校。

She was dining out in some café with a tall lank doctor friend of hers.

她正在一家咖啡馆里和她的一位瘦高的医生朋友一起吃饭。

Probably she was to marry him!

说不定她就要嫁给他了！

"I'll have that news for breakfast!" Roger smote his paper savagely.

“我早餐时就会听到这个消息！”罗杰狠狠地敲打着他的报纸。

Why couldn't Laura have waited a little?

劳拉为什么就不能等一下呢？

Restlessly he walked the room.

他不安地在房间里走来走去。

Then he went into the hall, took his hat and a heavy stick which he used for his night rambles, and walked off through the neighborhood.

然后他走进大厅，拿起帽子和一根晚上散步用的粗棍子，穿过街区走了出去。

It was the first Saturday evening of Spring, and on those quiet downtown streets he met couples strolling by.

那是春天的第一个星期六晚上，在市中心那些安静的街道上，他遇到了漫步的情侣。

A tall thin lad and a buxom girl went into a cheap apartment building laughing gaily to themselves, and Roger thought of Laura.

一个高瘦的小伙子和一个丰满的女孩走进一栋廉价的公寓楼，开心地笑着，罗杰想起了劳拉。

A group of young Italians passed, humming "Trovatore," and it put him in mind of the time when he had ushered at the opera.

一群年轻的意大利人哼着《游吟诗人》走过，这让他想起了自己在歌剧院迎来的时光。

Would Laura's young man be willing to usher?

劳拉的小伙子愿意接待吗？

More like him to _tango_ down the aisle!

更像是他在红毯上_探戈_！

He reached Washington Square feeling tired but even more restless than before.

到达华盛顿广场时，他感到疲倦，但比以前更加焦躁。

He climbed to the top of a motor 'bus, and on the lurching ride uptown he darkly reflected that times had changed.

他爬上一辆公共汽车的车顶，在上城区摇摇晃晃的行驶过程中，他阴郁地意识到时代已经变了。

He thought of the Avenue he had known, with its long lines of hansom cabs, its dashing broughams and coupés with jingling harness, livened footmen, everything sprucely up-to-date.

他想起了他所熟悉的大道，那里排着长长的双轮马车，有马具叮当作响的潇洒四轮马车和双门轿跑车，充满活力的男仆，一切都打扮得漂漂亮亮的。

How the horses had added to the town.

马匹如何为城镇增添了色彩。

But they were gone, and in their place were these great cats, these purring motors, sliding softly by the 'bus.

但它们不见了，取而代之的是这些伟大的猫科动物，这些发出咕噜声的马达，在“公共汽车”上轻轻地滑行。

Roger had swift glimpses down into lighted limousines.

罗杰迅速瞥见下面亮着灯的豪华轿车。

In one a big rich looking chap with a beard had a dressy young woman in his arms.

其中一张照片上，一个留着胡子、看上去很有钱的大男人，怀里抱着一个衣着讲究的年轻女子。

Lord, how he was hugging her!

天啊，他多么拥抱她啊！

Laura would have a motor like that, kisses like that, a life like that!

劳拉会有那样的马达，那样的吻，那样的生活！

She was the kind to go it hard!

她就是那种要努力的人！

Ahead as far as he could see was a dark rolling torrent of cars, lights gleaming by the thousand.

他所能看到的前方，是黑压压的汽车洪流，数千辆灯光闪烁。

A hubbub of gay voices, cries and little shrieks of laughter mingled with the blare of horns.

欢快的声音、哭声、尖笑声和喇叭声交织在一起。

He looked at huge shop windows softly lighted with displays of bedrooms richly furnished, of gorgeous women's apparel, silks and lacy filmy stuffs.

他看着巨大的商店橱窗，灯光柔和，陈列着布置丰富的卧室、华丽的女装、丝绸和蕾丝薄膜制品。

And to Roger, in his mood of anxious premonition, these bedroom scenes said plainly,

对于罗杰来说，在他焦虑的预感中，这些卧室场景清楚地告诉他：

"O come, all ye faithful wives!

“来吧，所有忠实的妻子们！

Come let us adore him, and deck ourselves to please his eye, to catch his eye, to hold his eye!

来吧，让我们崇拜他，打扮自己来取悦他的目光，吸引他的目光，吸引他的目光！

For marriage is a game these days!"

现在的婚姻就是一场游戏！”

Yes, Laura would be a spender, a spender and a speeder too!

是的，劳拉会是一个花钱大手大脚的人，而且还是一个花钱大手大脚的人！

How much money had he, that chap?

那家伙他有多少钱？

And damn him, what had he in his past?

该死的，他过去有过什么？

How Roger hated the very thought of poking into another man's life!

罗杰多么讨厌窥探另一个人的生活！

Poking where nobody wanted him!

戳到没人想要他的地方！

He felt desperately alone.

他感到极度孤独。

To-night they were dancing, he recalled, not at a party in somebody's home, but in some flashy public place where girls of her kind and fancy women gaily mixed together!

他回忆道，今晚他们在跳舞，不是在某人家里的聚会上，而是在某个华丽的公共场所，在那里，她善良的女孩和漂亮的女人欢快地混合在一起！

How mixed the whole city was getting, he thought, how mad and strange, gone out of its mind, this city of his children's lives crowding in upon him!

他想，整个城市变得多么混乱，多么疯狂和奇怪，失去了理智，这座孩子们生活的城市正向他涌来！

CHAPTER IV

第四章

He breakfasted with Deborah late on Sunday morning.

周日上午晚些时候，他和黛博拉一起吃早餐。

He had come down at the usual hour despite his long tramp of the previous night, for he wanted to tell her the news and talk it all out before Laura came down--because Deborah, he hadn't a doubt, with her woman's curiosity had probed deep into Laura's affairs in the many long talks they had had in her room.

尽管前一天晚上他走了很长一段路，他还是按照平常的时间下来了，因为他想在劳拉下来之前告诉她这个消息，并把一切都说清楚——因为黛博拉，他毫不怀疑，带着她女人的好奇心，他们在劳拉房间里进行了多次长时间的谈话，深入探究了劳拉的事情。

He had often heard them there.

他经常在那里听到他们的声音。

And so, as he waited and waited and still his daughter did not come, Roger grew distinctly annoyed; and when at last she did appear, his greeting was perfunctory:

因此，当他等啊等，他的女儿仍然没有来时，罗杰明显感到恼火。当她终于出现时，他的问候很敷衍：

"What kept you out so late last night?"

“你昨晚怎么这么晚才出去？”

"Oh, I was having a very good time," said Deborah contentedly.

“噢，我玩得很开心。”黛博拉满足地说。

She poured herself some coffee.

她给自己倒了一些咖啡。

"I've always wanted," she went on, "to see Laura really puzzled--downright flabbergasted.

“我一直希望，”她继续说道，“看到劳拉真的很困惑——完全惊呆了。

And I saw her just like that last night."

昨晚我就这样看到了她。”

Roger looked up with a jerk of his head:

罗杰猛地抬起头：

"You and Laura--together last night?"

“你和劳拉——昨晚在一起吗？”

"Exactly--on the Astor Roof." At her father's glare of astonishment a look of quiet relish came over her mobile features.

“没错——在阿斯特屋顶上。”看到父亲惊讶的目光，她那张动人的脸上露出了一种平静的津津有味的神情。

Her wide lips twitched a little.

她宽大的嘴唇微微抽动。

"Well, why not?" she asked him.

“嗯，为什么不呢？”她问他。

"I'm quite a dancer down at school.

“我在学校是一名舞者。

And last night with Allan Baird--we were dining together, you know--he proposed we go somewhere and dance.

昨晚和艾伦·贝尔德——我们一起吃饭，你知道——他提议我们去某个地方跳舞。

He's a perfectly awful dancer, and so I held out as long as I could.

他的舞跳得非常糟糕，所以我尽可能地坚持下去。

But he insisted and I gave in, though I much prefer the theater."

但他坚持，我屈服了，尽管我更喜欢剧院。”

"Well!" breathed Roger softly.

“出色地！”罗杰轻轻地呼吸道。

"So you hoof it with the rest!" His expression was startled and intent.

“所以你和其他人一起蹄吧！”他的表情既震惊又专注。

Would he ever get to know these girls?

他会认识这些女孩吗？

"Well," he added with a sigh, "I suppose you know what you're about."

“好吧，”他叹了口气，补充道，“我想你知道自己在做什么。”

"Oh no, I don't," she answered.

“哦，不，我不，”她回答。

"I never know what I'm about.

“我从来不知道自己在做什么。

If you always do, you miss so much--you get into a solemn habit of trying nothing till you're sure.

如果你总是这样做，你就会错过很多东西——你会养成一种严肃的习惯，在确定之前什么都不尝试。

But to return to Laura.

但回到劳拉。

As we came gaily down the room we ran right into her, you see.

你看，当我们兴高采烈地穿过房间时，我们正好撞见了她。

That's how Allan dances.

艾伦就是这样跳舞的。

And when we collided, I smiled at her sweetly and said, 'Why, hello, dearie--you here too?" And Deborah sipped her coffee.

当我们相撞时，我对她甜蜜地微笑着说：‘嗨，你好，亲爱的——你也在这里吗？黛博拉喝了一口咖啡。

"I have never believed that the lower jaw of a well-bred girl could actually drop open.

“我从来不相信一个有教养的女孩的下颌真的会张开。

But Laura's did.

但劳拉做到了。

With a good strong light, Allan told me, he could have examined her tonsils for her.

艾伦告诉我，只要有强光，他就可以为她检查扁桃体。

Rather a disgusting thought.

而是一个令人厌恶的想法。

You see until she saw me there, poor Laura had me so thoroughly placed--my school-marm job, my tastes and habits, everything, all cut and dried.

你看，直到她在那儿看到我，可怜的劳拉才把我彻底安置好——我的女教师的工作，我的品味和习惯，一切，都被切碎了。

She has never once come to my school, and in every talk we've ever had there has always been some perfectly good and absorbing reason why we should talk about Laura alone."

她从来没有来过我的学校，在我们进行的每一次谈话中，总是有一些非常好的、引人入胜的理由，说明为什么我们应该单独谈论劳拉。”

"There is now," said her father.

“现在有了，”她父亲说。

He was in no mood for tomfoolery.

他没心情胡闹。

His daughter saw it and smiled a little.

女儿看见了，微微一笑。

"What is it?" she inquired.

“那是什么？”她询问道。

And then he let her have it!

然后他就让她拥有了！

"Laura wants to get married," he snapped.

“劳拉想结婚，”他厉声说道。

Deborah caught her breath at that, and an eager excited expression swept over her attractive face.

黛博拉听了这话，屏住了呼吸，迷人的脸上掠过一丝急切兴奋的表情。

She had leaned forward suddenly.

她突然向前倾身。

"Father!

“父亲！

No!

不！

Which one?" she asked.

哪一个？”她问道。

"Tell me!

“告诉我！

Is it Harold Sloane?"

是哈罗德·斯隆吗？”

"It is."

“这是。”

"Oh, dad." She sank back in her chair.

“噢，爸爸。”她坐回椅子上。

"Oh, dad," she repeated.

“哦，爸爸，”她重复道。

"What's the matter with Sloane?" he demanded.

“斯隆怎么了？”他问道。

"Oh, nothing, nothing--it's all right--"

“噢，没什么，没什么——没关系——”

"It is, eh?

“是这样，嗯？

How do you know it is?" His anxious eyes were still upon hers, and he saw she was thinking fast and hard and shutting him completely out.

你怎么知道是这样？”他焦急的目光仍然落在她的身上，他看到她正在快速而认真地思考，完全将他拒之门外。

And it irritated him.

这激怒了他。

"What do you know of this fellow Sloane?"

“你对斯隆这个家伙了解多少？”

"Oh, nothing--nothing--"

“噢，没什么——没什么——”

"Nothing!

“没什么！

Humph!

哼！

Then why do you sit here and say it's all right?

那你为什么坐在这里说没关系？

Don't talk like a fool!" he exclaimed.

别像个傻子一样说话！”他惊呼道。

He waited, but she said no more, and Roger's exasperation increased.

他等待着，但她没有再说什么，罗杰的愤怒更加增加了。

"He has money enough apparently--and they'll spend it like March hares!"

“显然他有足够的钱——他们会像三月的兔子一样花掉它！”

Deborah looked up at him:

黛博拉抬头看着他：

"What did Laura tell you, dear?"

“劳拉告诉你什么了，亲爱的？”

"Not very much.

“不是很多。

I'm only her father.

我只是她的父亲。

She had a dinner and dance on her mind."

她脑子里想着晚餐和跳舞。”

But Deborah pressed her questions and he gave her brief replies.

但黛博拉追问了她的问题，他给了她简短的答复。

"Well, what shall we do about it?" he asked.

“那么，我们该怎么办呢？”他问道。

"Nothing--until we know something more." Roger regarded her fiercely.

“没什么——除非我们知道更多。”罗杰恶狠狠地看着她。

"Why don't you go up and talk to her, then?"

“那你为什么不上去和她谈谈呢？”

"She's asleep yet--"

“她还没睡——”

"Never mind if she is!

“不管她是不是！

If she's going to marry a chap like that and ruin her life it's high time she was up for her breakfast!"

如果她要嫁给这样的人并毁了她的生活，那么她就该起床吃早餐了！”

While he scanned his Sunday paper he heard Deborah in the pantry.

当他浏览周日报纸时，他听到黛博拉在食品储藏室里。

She emerged with a breakfast tray and he saw her start up to Laura's room.

她端着早餐托盘出现，他看到她朝劳拉的房间走去。

She was there for over an hour.

她在那里呆了一个多小时。

And when she returned to his study, he saw her eyes were shining.

当她回到他的书房时，他看到她的眼睛闪闪发亮。

How women's eyes will shine at such times, he told himself in annoyance.

女人的眼睛在这种时候会闪闪发亮，他懊恼地告诉自己。

"Well?" he demanded.

“出色地？”他问道。

"Better leave her alone to-day," she advised.

“今天最好别打扰她，”她建议道。

"Harold is coming some night soon."

“哈罗德很快就会在某个晚上来。”

"What for?"

“做什么的？”

"To have a talk with you."

“想和你谈谈。”

Her father smote his paper.

她父亲打了他的报纸。

"What did she tell you about him?" he asked.

“她跟你说了什么关于他的事？”他问道。

"Not much more than she told you.

“不比她告诉你的多多少。

His parents are dead--but he has a rich widowed aunt in Bridgeport who adores him.

他的父母去世了，但他在布里奇波特有一位富有的寡妇阿姨，她非常崇拜他。

They mean to be married the end of May.

他们打算五月底结婚。

She wants a church wedding, bridesmaids, ushers--the wedding reception here, of course--"

她想要一场教堂婚礼，有伴娘、引座员——当然还有这里的婚宴——”

"Oh, Lord," breathed Roger dismally.

“哦，主啊，”罗杰沮丧地喘着气。

"We won't bother you much, father dear--"

“我们不会太打扰你，亲爱的父亲——”

"You _will_ bother me much," he retorted.

“你会很烦我的，”他反驳道。

"I propose to be bothered--bothered a lot!

“我建议被打扰——非常麻烦！

I'm going to look up this fellow Sloane--"

我要去找斯隆这个家伙——”

"But let's leave him alone for to-day." She bent over her father compassionately.

“不过今天我们先别管他了。”她慈悲地向父亲弯下腰。

"What a night you must have had, poor dear." Roger looked up in grim reproach.

“你一定度过了一个多么美好的夜晚，可怜的亲爱的。”罗杰抬起头，脸上带着严厉的责备。

"You like all this," he grunted.

“你喜欢这一切，”他咕哝道。

"You, a grown woman, a teacher too."

“你，一个成年女性，也是一名老师。”

"I wonder if I do," she said.

“我想知道我是否愿意，”她说。

"I guess I'm a queer person, dad, a curious family mixture--of Laura and Edith and mother and you, with a good deal of myself thrown in.

“我想我是一个奇怪的人，爸爸，一个奇怪的家庭混合体——劳拉和伊迪丝，母亲和你，还有很多我自己。

But it feels rather good to be mixed, don't you think?

但混在一起的感觉很好，你不觉得吗？

Let's stay mixed as long as we can--and keep together the family."

让我们尽可能长时间地保持混合——并让家庭保持在一起。”

* * * * *

** ** ** **

That afternoon, to distract him, Deborah took her father to a concert in Carnegie Hall.

那天下午，为了分散他的注意力，黛博拉带她父亲去卡内基音乐厅听一场音乐会。

She had often urged him to go of late, but despite his liking for music Roger had refused before, simply because it was a change.

她最近经常催促他去，但尽管罗杰喜欢音乐，但他以前拒绝了，只是因为这是一个改变。

But why balk at going anywhere now, when Laura was up to such antics at home?

但是，当劳拉在家里做出如此滑稽的举动时，为什么现在不愿意去任何地方呢？

"Do you mind climbing up to the gallery?" Deborah asked as they entered the hall.

“你介意爬到画廊去吗？”当他们进入大厅时，黛博拉问道。

"Not at all," he curtly answered.

“一点也不，”他简短地回答。

He did mind it very much!

他确实很介意！

"Then we'll go to the very top," she said.

“然后我们就去山顶，”她说。

"It's a long climb but I want you to see it.

“这是一段漫长的攀登，但我希望你能看到它。

It's so different up there."

那里的情况很不一样。”

"I don't doubt it," he replied.

“我不怀疑，”他回答道。

And as they made the slow ascent, pettishly he wondered why Deborah must always be so eager for queer places.

当他们缓慢上升时，他有些生气地想知道为什么黛博拉一定总是如此渴望去奇怪的地方。

Galleries, zoo schools, tenement slums--why not take a two dollar seat in life?

画廊、动物园学校、公寓贫民窟——为什么不在生活中坐个两美元的座位呢？

Deborah seated him far down in the front of the great gallery, over at the extreme right, and from here they could look back and up at a huge dim arena of faces.

黛博拉让他坐在大画廊前面很远的地方，在最右边，从这里他们可以向后和向上看到一个巨大的昏暗舞台上的面孔。

"Now watch them close," she whispered.

“现在仔细观察他们，”她低声说道。

"See what the music does to them."

“看看音乐对他们有什么影响。”

As the symphony began below the faces all grew motionless.

当下面的交响乐开始时，所有人的脸都变得一动不动。

And as the music cast its spell, the anxious ruffled feelings which had been with Roger all that day little by little were dispelled, and soon his imagination began to work upon this scene.

随着音乐的施展魔力，罗杰一整天的焦躁不安的情绪一点一点地被驱散了，很快他的想象力开始浮现在这个场景上。

He saw many familiar American types.

他看到了许多熟悉的美国人。

He felt he knew what they had been doing on Sundays only a few years before.

他觉得他知道几年前他们星期天在做什么。

After church they had eaten large Sunday dinners.

做完礼拜后，他们吃了一顿丰盛的周日晚餐。

Then some had napped and some had walked and some had gone to Sunday school.

然后，有些人睡了，有些人走路了，有些人去了主日学校。

At night they had had cold suppers, and afterwards some had gone back to church; while others, as in Roger's house in the days when Judith was alive, had gathered around the piano for hymns.

晚上，他们吃了冷晚餐，然后一些人回到了教堂。而其他人，就像朱迪思在世时在罗杰家里一样，聚集在钢琴周围唱赞美诗。

Young men callers, friends of their daughters, had joined in the family singing.

来电的年轻男子是他们女儿的朋友，也加入了家庭唱歌。

Yes, some of these people had been like that.

是的，其中一些人就是这样的。

To them, a few short years ago, a concert on the Sabbath would have seemed a sacrilege.

对他们来说，几年前，安息日举行音乐会似乎是一种亵渎。

He could almost hear from somewhere the echo of "Abide With Me."

他几乎能从某个地方听到“与我同在”的回声。

But over this memory of a song rose now the surging music of Tschaikovsky's "Pathetique." And the yearnings and fierce hungers in this tumultuous music swept all the hymns from Roger's mind.

但现在，柴可夫斯基的《悲怆》的澎湃音乐在这首歌的记忆中升起。而这喧闹音乐中的向往和强烈的饥饿，将罗杰脑海中的所有赞美诗一扫而空。

Once more he watched the gallery, and this time he became aware that more than half were foreigners.

他再次观察画廊，这一次他发现一半以上都是外国人。

Out of the mass from every side individual faces emerged, swarthy, weird, and staring hungrily into space.

从四面八方的人群中浮现出一张张面孔，黝黑、怪异，饥渴地凝视着太空。

And to Roger the whole shadowy place, the very air, grew pregnant, charged with all these inner lives bound together in this mood, this mystery that had swept over them all, immense and formless, baffling, this furious demanding and this blind wistful groping which he himself had known so well, ever since his wife had died and he had lost his faith in God.

对罗杰来说，整个阴暗的地方，连空气都孕育着，充满了所有这些内心的生命，在这种情绪中结合在一起，这种神秘席卷了他们所有人，巨大而无形，令人困惑，这种疯狂的要求和这种盲目渴望的摸索，自从他的妻子去世并且他对上帝失去了信心以来，他自己就非常熟悉了。

What was the meaning of it all if life were nothing but a start, and there were nothing but the grave?

如果生命只是一个开始，除了坟墓什么也没有，那么这一切还有什么意义呢？

"You will live on in our children's lives."

“你将继续活在我们孩子的生活中。”

He glanced around at Deborah.

他环视黛博拉。

Was _she_ so certain, so serene?

她是如此确定、如此平静吗？

"What do I know of her?" he asked.

“我对她了解多少？”他问道。

"Little or nothing," he sadly replied.

“很少或根本没有，”他悲伤地回答道。

And he tried to piece together from things she had told him her life as it had passed him by.

他试图从她告诉他的她过去的生活中的事情拼凑起来。

Had there been no questionings, no sharp disillusionments?

难道没有质疑，没有强烈的幻灭吗？

There must have been.

一定有过。

He recalled irritabilities, small acts and exclamations of impatience, boredom, "blues." And as he watched her he grew sure that his daughter's existence had been like his own.

他回忆起自己的烦躁、小举动以及不耐烦、无聊和“忧郁”的感叹。当他看着她时，他越来越确信他女儿的存在就像他自己的一样。

Despite its different setting, its other aims and visions, it had been a mere beginning, a feeling for a foothold, a search for light and happiness.

尽管它的背景、目标和愿景不同，但这只是一个开始，一种立足点的感觉，一种对光明和幸福的追寻。

And Deborah seemed to him still a child.

在他看来，黛博拉还是个孩子。

"How far will _you_ go?" he wondered.

“你会走多远？”他想知道。

Although he was still watching her even after the music had ceased, she did not notice him for a time.

尽管音乐停止后他仍在注视着她，但她一时没有注意到他。

Then she turned to him slowly with a smile.

然后她慢慢转向他，微笑着。

"Well?

“嗯？

What did you see?" she asked.

你看到了什么？”她问道。

"I wasn't looking," he replied.

“我没有看，”他回答道。

"Why, dearie," she retorted.

“为什么，亲爱的，”她反驳道。

"Where's that imagination of yours?"

“你的想象力哪去了？”

"It was with you," he answered.

“是和你一起的，”他回答道。

"Tell me what you were thinking."

“告诉我你在想什么。”

And still under the spell of the music, Deborah said to her father,

黛博拉仍然沉浸在音乐的魅力中，对她的父亲说：

"I was thinking of hungry people--millions of them, now, this minute--not only here but in so many places--concerts, movies, libraries.

“我想到了饥饿的人们——现在，这一分钟，有数百万人——不仅在这里，而且在很多地方——音乐会、电影、图书馆。

Hungry, oh, for everything--life, its beauty, all it means.

哦，渴望一切——生命，它的美丽，它的一切意义。

And I was thinking this is youth--no matter how old they happen to be--and that to feed it we have schools.

我在想这就是年轻人——无论他们多大——为了养活他们，我们有学校。

I was thinking how little we've done as yet, and of all that we're so sure to do in the many, many years ahead.

我在想我们到目前为止所做的事情是多么的少，而我们在未来的许多年里肯定会做的所有事情。

Do you see what I mean?" she squeezed his hand.

你明白我的意思吗？”她握紧了他的手。

"Welcome back to school," she said, "back into the hungry army of youth!...

“欢迎回到学校，”她说，“回到饥饿的青年大军！......

Sh-h-h!"

嘘——嘘！”

Again the music had begun.

音乐又开始了。

And sitting by her side he wondered whether it was because she knew that Laura's affair had made him feel old that Deborah had brought him here.

坐在她身边，他想知道黛博拉是否是因为知道劳拉的外遇让他觉得自己老了，才带他来这里的。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

They went to Edith's for supper.

他们去伊迪丝家吃晚饭。

The Cunninghams' apartment was on the west side, well uptown.

坎宁安一家的公寓位于住宅区的西侧。

It was not the neighborhood which Edith would have chosen, for nearly all the nice people she knew lived east of the park.

伊迪丝不会选择这个社区，因为几乎所有她认识的好人都住在公园东边。

But rents were somewhat lower here and there was at least an abundance of fresh air for her family.

但这里的租金要低一些，而且至少她的家人有充足的新鲜空气。

Edith had found that her days were full of these perplexing decisions.

伊迪丝发现她的日子充满了这些令人困惑的决定。

It was all very simple to resolve that her children be old-fashioned, normal, wholesome, nice.

她的孩子们要守旧、正常、健康、友善，这一切都很容易解决。

But then she looked into the city--into schools and kindergartens, clothes and friends and children's parties, books and plays.

但随后她审视了这座城市——学校和幼儿园、衣服、朋友、儿童聚会、书籍和戏剧。

And through them all to her dismay she felt conflicting currents, clashes between old and new.

令她沮丧的是，透过这一切，她感受到了新旧之间的矛盾潮流和冲突。

She felt New York.

她感受到了纽约。

And anxiously she asked herself, "What is old-fashioned?

她焦急地问自己：“什么是守旧？

What is normal?

什么是正常的？

What is wholesome?

什么是有益健康的？

What is nice?" Cautiously she made her way, testing and comparing, trying small experiments.

有什么好看的？”她小心翼翼地前进，测试和比较，尝试小实验。

Often sharply she would draw in her horns.

她常常会猛地收起自己的角。

She had struck something "common!" And she knew all this was nothing compared to the puzzles that lay ahead.

她发现了一些“常见的东西！”她知道，与面前的谜题相比，这一切都不算什么。

For from her friend, Madge Deering, whose girls were well along in their 'teens, she heard of deeper problems.

她从她的朋友玛吉·迪林那里了解到了更深层次的问题，她的女儿们都已经十几岁了。

The girls were so inquisitive.

姑娘们真是好奇极了。

Dauntlessly Madge was facing each month the most disturbing questions.

勇敢无畏的玛奇每个月都会面临最令人不安的问题。

Thank Heaven, Edith had only one daughter.

感谢上帝，伊迪丝只有一个女儿。

Sons were not quite so baffling.

儿子们则没有那么令人困惑。

So she had groped her way along.

于是，她就一路摸索着走下去。

When her father and Deborah arrived, placidly she asked them what they had been doing.

当她父亲和黛博拉到达时，她平静地问他们在做什么。

And when she heard that they had been at a concert on the Sabbath, though this was far from old-fashioned and something she would not have done herself, it did not bother her half so much as the fact that Hannah, the Irish nurse, had slapped little Tad that afternoon.

当她听说他们在安息日参加了一场音乐会时，虽然这远非过时的事，而且她自己也不会这样做，但她并没有像那天下午爱尔兰护士汉娜打了小泰德一巴掌那样困扰她。

She had never known Hannah to do it before.

她以前从不知道汉娜会这么做。

Could it be that the girl was tired or sick?

难道是女孩累了或者生病了？

Perhaps she needed a few days off.

也许她需要休息几天。

"I must have a talk with her," Edith thought, "as soon as father and Deborah go."

“我必须和她谈谈，”伊迪丝想，“等父亲和黛博拉一走。”

Roger always liked to come here.

罗杰总是喜欢来这里。

Say what you would about Edith's habit of keeping too closely to her home, the children to whom she had devoted herself were a fine, clean, happy lot.

不管你对伊迪丝离家太近的习惯有何看法，她所倾注心血的孩子们都是一群优秀、干净、快乐的孩子。

Here were new lives in his family, glorious fresh beginnings.

他的家庭迎来了新的生活，辉煌的新开始。

He sat on the floor with her three boys, watching the patient efforts of George to harness his perturbed white rat to Tad's small fire engine.

他和她的三个儿子坐在地板上，看着乔治耐心地努力把他那只不安的白老鼠拴在泰德的小消防车上。

George was a lank sprawling lad of fourteen, all legs and arms and elbows, with rumpled hair and freckled face, a quick bright smile and nice brown eyes--frank, simple, understandable eyes.

乔治是个十四岁的小伙子，身材瘦长，四肢伸直，四肢、胳膊和肘部都长满了，头发乱糟糟的，脸上长满雀斑，脸上挂着灿烂的笑容，一双漂亮的棕色眼睛——坦率、简单、可以理解的眼睛。

All but one of Edith's children were boys, and boys were a blessed relief to a man who had three grown-up daughters.

伊迪丝的孩子除了一个之外都是男孩，对于一个拥有三个女儿的男人来说，男孩是一种幸福的解脱。

And while Roger watched them, with a gentle glow of anticipation he waited for what should follow, when as had been already arranged Deborah should break to her sister the news of Laura's engagement.

当罗杰看着他们时，他带着温柔的期待等待着接下来发生的事情，按照已经安排好的黛博拉应该向她妹妹通报劳拉订婚的消息。

And he was not disappointed.

他并没有失望。

The change in Edith was something tremendous.

伊迪丝的变化是巨大的。

Until now so quietly self-absorbed, at the news that Laura was to be married instantly she was all alert.

到目前为止，她一直默默地专注于自我，一听到劳拉即将结婚的消息，她就警觉起来。

Sitting there in the midst of her children and facing a time of agony only a few weeks ahead which would add one more to her family, Edith's pretty florid face grew flushed and radiant as she exclaimed,

伊迪丝坐在孩子们中间，面临着几周前的痛苦时刻，这将给她的家庭增添一个新成员，伊迪丝漂亮的红脸变得红润而容光焕发，她大声喊道：

"What a perfectly wonderful thing for Laura!

“对于劳拉来说，这是多么美妙的事情啊！

Now if only she can have a child!"

现在要是她能有个孩子就好了！”

Her questions followed thick and fast, and with them her thoughts of what should be done.

她的问题接踵而至，随之而来的是她对应该做什么的想法。

Bruce must look up this suitor at once.

布鲁斯必须立即寻找这位追求者。

Bruce demurred stoutly but without avail.

布鲁斯极力反对，但无济于事。

She eagerly questioned her sister as to Laura's plans for the wedding, but plainly she considered that Deborah was no woman to give her the full information she wanted.

她急切地询问姐姐劳拉的婚礼计划，但显然她认为黛博拉不是一个能够向她提供她想要的全部信息的女人。

She must see Laura herself at once.

她必须立即见到劳拉本人。

For though she had thoroughly disapproved of the gay helter-skelter existence of her youngest sister, still Laura was now to be married, and this made all the difference.

因为尽管她完全不同意她最小的妹妹的同性恋混乱的存在，但劳拉现在仍然要结婚，这使一切变得不同。

Just before Roger and Deborah left, Edith drew her father aside, and with a curious concern and pity in her voice, she said,

就在罗杰和黛博拉离开之前，伊迪丝把她的父亲拉到一边，声音里带着一种奇怪的关心和怜悯，她说：

"I'm so sorry I shan't be able to help you with the wedding, dear, and make it the sweet old-fashioned kind that mother would have wanted.

“亲爱的，我很抱歉我无法帮助你举办婚礼，也无法将婚礼办成母亲想要的那种甜蜜的老式婚礼。

Of course there's Deborah, she'll be there.

当然还有黛博拉，她会在那里。

But her head is so full of new ideas.

但她的脑子里充满了新想法。

I'm afraid she may find the house rather a burden after Laura has gone away." Edith gave a worried little sigh.

我担心劳拉走后她可能会觉得房子成了一种负担。”伊迪丝忧心忡忡地叹了口气。

"I'll be so glad," she added, "when we get that place in Morristown.

“当我们在莫里斯敦得到那个地方时，我会很高兴，”她补充道。

We'll want you out there often, and for good long visits too.

我们希望您经常到那里，并进行长时间的访问。

You may even find you'll care to try staying there with us for a while."

你甚至可能会发现你愿意尝试和我们一起住一段时间。”

Roger scowled and thanked her.

罗杰皱起眉头向她道谢。

She had given him a shock of alarm.

她让他大吃一惊。

"So she thinks that Deborah will find the housekeeping too hard," he reflected anxiously.

“所以她认为黛博拉会觉得家务太辛苦了，”他焦急地反思道。

And as he walked home with his daughter, he kept glancing at her face, which for all its look of quiet had so much tensity beneath.

当他带着女儿走回家时，他不断地看着她的脸，尽管她看上去很平静，但内心却充满了紧张。

She had packed her life so full of school.

她的生活充满了学校。

What if she wanted to give up their home?

如果她想放弃他们的家怎么办？

"She'll try, of course, she'll try her best--but she'll find it too much of an added strain." And again he felt that sickening dread.

“当然，她会尝试，她会尽力而为，但她会发现这会增加太多的压力。”他再次感受到那种令人作呕的恐惧。

Deborah said nothing.

黛博拉什么也没说。

He felt as though they had drifted apart.

他感觉他们好像已经疏远了。

And at night in his bed, as Roger stared up at the beetling cliff of apartment windows just outside, drearily he asked himself how it would feel to live like that.

晚上，罗杰躺在床上，抬头凝视着外面公寓窗户的陡峭悬崖，他忧郁地问自己，这样生活会是什么感觉。

CHAPTER V

第五章

One afternoon a few days later Roger was riding in the park.

几天后的一个下午，罗杰在公园里骑马。

He rode "William," a large lazy cob who as he advanced in age had so subtly and insidiously slackened his pace from a trot to a jog that Roger barely noticed how slowly he was riding.

他骑着“威廉”，一只懒惰的大雄天鹅，随着年龄的增长，他的步伐如此巧妙地、阴险地从小跑变成了慢跑，罗杰几乎没有注意到他骑得有多慢。

As he rode along he liked to watch the broad winding bridle path with its bobbing procession of riders that kept appearing before him under the tall spreading trees.

当他骑马沿途时，他喜欢观看宽阔蜿蜒的马道，以及在高大的树木下不断出现在他面前的骑手的队伍。

Though he knew scarcely anyone by name, he was a familiar figure here and he recognized scores of faces.

尽管他几乎不认识任何人的名字，但他是这里的一个熟悉人物，并且他认出了许多面孔。

To many men he nodded at passing, and to not a few alluring young dames, ardent creatures with bright eyes who gave him smiles of greeting, Roger gravely raised his hat.

罗杰对路过的许多男人点头致意，对不少迷人的年轻女士，这些目光明亮的热心女人向他微笑着打招呼，罗杰严肃地举起了帽子。

One was "The Silver Lady" in a Broadway musical show, but he thought she was "one of the Newport crowd." He liked to make shrewd guesses like that.

其中一个是百老汇音乐剧中的“银色女士”，但他认为她是“纽波特人群中的一员”。他喜欢做出这样精明的猜测。

There were so many kinds of people here.

这里有各种各样的人。

There were stout anxious ladies riding for figures and lean morose gentlemen riding for health.

有健壮焦虑的女士为了身材而骑行，也有精瘦忧郁的绅士为了健康而骑行。

There were joyous care-free girls, chatting and laughing merrily.

那里有一群快乐无忧无虑的女孩，有说有笑。

There were some gallant foreigners, and there were riding masters, and Roger could not tell them apart.

其中有英勇的外国人，也有骑术高手，罗杰分不清。

There were mad boys from the Squadron who rode at a furious canter, and there were groups of children, eager and flushed, excited and gay, with stolid grooms behind them.

中队里有疯狂的男孩，他们狂怒地慢跑，还有一群群孩子，热切而涨红，兴奋而快乐，后面跟着冷漠的马夫。

The path in several places ran close beside the main road of the park, and with the coming of the dusk this road took on deep purple hues and glistened with reflections from countless yellow motor eyes.

有几处小路紧挨着公园主路，随着黄昏的到来，这条路呈现出深紫色，在无数黄色马达眼的反射下闪闪发光。

And from the polished limousines, sumptuous young women smiled out upon the riders.

光鲜亮丽的豪华轿车上，华丽的年轻女子向乘客们微笑。

At least so Roger saw this life.

至少罗杰是这样看待这一生的。

And after those bleak lonely years confronted by eternity, it was good to come here and forget, to feel himself for the moment a part of the thoughtless gaiety, the ease and luxury of the town.

在度过了那些面对永恒的凄凉孤独的岁月之后，来到这里忘记一切，感觉自己暂时成为了这座城镇无忧无虑的欢乐、安逸和奢华的一部分，真是太好了。

Here he was just on the edge of it all.

在这里，他正处于这一切的边缘。

Often as a couple passed he would wonder what they were doing that night.

当一对情侣经过时，他常常会想知道他们那天晚上在做什么。

In the riding school where he kept his horse, it was a lazy pleasure to have the English "valet" there pull off his boots and breeches--though if anyone had told him so, Roger would have denied it with indignation and surprise.

在他养马的骑术学校里，让英国“贴身男仆”脱掉他的靴子和马裤是一种懒惰的乐趣——尽管如果有人告诉他这一点，罗杰会愤怒和惊讶地否认。

For was he not an American?

因为他不是美国人吗？

It had been a wonderful tonic, a great idea of Laura's, this forcing him up here to ride.

这是一种美妙的滋补品，劳拉的一个好主意，这迫使他来这里骑马。

In one of her affectionate moods, just after a sick spell he had been through, his gay capricious daughter had insisted that he have his horse brought down from the mountains.

就在他经历了一段病痛之后，他那欢快任性的女儿在她深情的心情中坚持要他把他的马从山上牵下来。

She had promised to ride with him herself, and she had done so--for a week.

她答应亲自和他一起骑行，而且她也做到了——持续了一个星期。

Since then he had often met her here with one of her many smart young men.

从那时起，他经常在这里见到她和她众多聪明的年轻人之一。

What a smile of greeting would flash on her face--when Laura happened to notice him.

当劳拉碰巧注意到他时，她的脸上会闪现出多么亲切的微笑啊。

He was thinking of Laura now, and there was an anxious gleam in his eyes.

他现在想起了劳拉，眼中闪过一丝焦急的光芒。

For young Sloane was coming to dinner to-night.

因为年轻的斯隆今晚要来吃晚饭。

What was he going to say to the fellow?

他要对那个家伙说什么？

Bruce had learned that Sloane played polo, owned and drove a racing car and was well liked in his several clubs.

布鲁斯了解到斯隆打马球，拥有并驾驶一辆赛车，并且在他的几个俱乐部中很受欢迎。

But what about women and his past?

但女人和他的过去又如何呢？

Edith had urged her father to go through the lad's life with a fine tooth comb, and if he should find anything there to kick up no end of a row for the honor of the family.

伊迪丝敦促她的父亲仔细地审视这个小伙子的一生，如果他发现任何东西，就为了家族的荣誉而无休无止地争吵。

All of which was nothing but words, reflected Roger pettishly.

所有这些都只是言语，罗杰生气地想。

It all came to this, that he had a most ticklish evening ahead!

结果是，他即将度过一个最难熬的夜晚！

On the path as a rider greeted him, his reply was a dismal frown.

在路上，一名骑手向他打招呼，他的回答是愁眉不展。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

Laura's suitor arrived at six o'clock.

劳拉的追求者于六点钟到达。

In his study Roger heard the bell, listened a moment with beating heart, then raised himself heavily from his chair and went into the hallway.

罗杰在书房里听到铃声，心跳加速地听了一会儿，然后沉重地从椅子上站起来，走进走廊。

"Ah, yes!

“啊，是啊！

It's you!" he exclaimed, with a nervous cordiality.

是你！”他带着紧张的热情大声喊道。

"Come in, my boy, come right in!

“进来吧，我的孩子，快进来吧！

Here, let me help you with your coat.

来，让我帮你拿外套。

I don't know just where Laura is.

我不知道劳拉在哪里。

Ahem!" He violently cleared his throat.

咳咳！”他猛烈地清了清喉咙。

"Suppose while we're waiting we have a smoke." He kept it up back into his den.

“假设我们在等待的时候抽烟。”他把它放回了自己的书房。

There the suitor refused a cigar and carefully lit a cigarette.

求婚者拒绝了雪茄，并小心翼翼地点燃了一支香烟。

Roger noticed again how young the chap was, and marriage seemed so ridiculous!

罗杰再次注意到这个小伙子是多么年轻，婚姻似乎是如此可笑！

All this feverish trouble was for something so unreal!

所有这些狂热的麻烦都是为了一些如此不真实的事情！

"Well, sir," the candidate blurted forth, "I guess I'd better come right to the point.

“好吧，先生，”候选人脱口而出，“我想我最好开门见山。

Mr. Gale, I want to marry your daughter."

盖尔先生，我想娶你的女儿。”

"Laura?"

“劳拉？”

"Yes." Roger cursed himself.

“是的。”罗杰咒骂自己。

Why had he asked, "Laura?" Of course it was Laura!

他为什么问“劳拉？”当然是劳拉！

Would this cub be wanting Deborah?

这只幼崽会想要黛博拉吗？

"Well, my boy," he said thickly.

“好吧，我的孩子，”他粗声粗气地说。

"I--I wish I knew you better."

“我——我希望我能更了解你。”

"So do I, sir.

“我也是，先生。

Suppose we begin." The youth took a quick pull at his cigarette.

假设我们开始。”年轻人快速地吸了一口烟。

He waited, stirred nervously in his seat.

他等待着，在座位上紧张地动了动。

"You'll have some questions to ask, I suppose--"

“我想你会有一些问题要问——”

"Yes, there are questions." Roger had risen mechanically and was slowly walking the room.

“是的，有问题。”罗杰机械地站了起来，慢慢地在房间里走来走去。

He threw out short gruff phrases.

他吐出简短粗暴的短语。

"I'm not interested in your past--I don't care about digging into a man--I never have and I never will--except as it might affect my daughter.

“我对你的过去不感兴趣——我不关心深入探究一个男人——我从来没有，也永远不会——除非这可能会影响我的女儿。

That's the main question, I suppose.

我想这是主要问题。

Can you make her happy?"

你能让她幸福吗？”

"I think so," said Sloane, decidedly.

“我想是的，”斯隆斩钉截铁地说。

Roger gave him a glance of displeasure.

罗杰不满地看了他一眼。

"That's a large order, young man," he rejoined.

“这是一笔大订单，年轻人，”他回答道。

"Then let's take it in sections," the youngster replied.

“那我们就分段来说吧。”年轻人回答道。

Confound his boyish assurance!

推翻他孩子气的保证！

"To begin with," he was saying, "I rather think I have money enough.

“首先，”他说，“我宁愿认为我有足够的钱。

We'd better go into that, hadn't we?"

我们最好深入探讨一下，不是吗？”

"Yes," said Roger indifferently.

“是的。”罗杰淡淡地说。

"We might as well go into it." Of course the chap had money enough.

“我们不妨深入探讨一下。”当然，这家伙有足够的钱。

He was a money maker.

他是一个赚钱的人。

You could hear it in his voice; you could see it in his jaw, in his small aggressive blonde moustache.

你可以从他的声音中听出这一点；你可以从他的下巴、他那充满侵略性的金色小胡子中看到这一点。

Now he was telling briefly of his rich aunt in Bridgeport, of the generous start she had given him, his work downtown, his income.

现在他正在简短地讲述他在布里奇波特的富有的姨妈，她给他的慷慨的开始，他在市中心的工作，他的收入。

"Twenty-two thousand this year," he said.

“今年有两万两千人，”他说。

"We can live on that all right, I guess."

“我想我们可以靠这个生活。”

"You won't starve," was the dry response.

“你不会饿死的。”这是干巴巴的回答。

Roger walked for a moment in silence, then turned abruptly on young Sloane.

罗杰沉默地走了一会儿，然后突然转向年轻的斯隆。

"Look here, young man, I don't want to dig," he continued very huskily.

“看这里，年轻人，我不想挖，”他沙哑地继续说道。

"But I know little or nothing of what may be behind you.

“但我对你背后可能发生的事情知之甚少或一无所知。

I don't care to ask you about it now--unless it can make trouble."

我现在不想问你这件事——除非这会引起麻烦。”

"It can't make trouble." At this answer, low but sharp, Roger wheeled and shot a glance into those clear and twinkling eyes.

“这不能惹麻烦。”听到这个低沉而尖锐的回答，罗杰转过身，瞥了一眼那双清澈闪烁的眼睛。

And his own eyes gleamed with pain.

而他自己的眼睛也闪烁着痛苦的光芒。

Laura had been such a little thing in the days when she had been his pet, the days when he had known her well.

当劳拉还是他的宠物的时候，当他很了解她的时候，劳拉就只是个小东西。

What could he do about it?

他能做什么呢？

This was only the usual thing.

这只是平常的事情。

But he felt suddenly sick of life.

但他突然感到厌倦了生活。

"How soon do you want to get married?" he demanded harshly.

“你想多久结婚？”他严厉地要求。

"Next month, if we can."

“如果可以的话，下个月。”

"Where are you going?"

“你要去哪里？”

"Abroad," said Sloane.

“在国外，”斯隆说。

Roger caught at this topic as at a straw.

罗杰抓住了这个话题，就像抓住了一根救命稻草。

Soon they were talking of the trip, and the tension slackened rapidly.

很快他们就开始谈论这次旅行，紧张气氛迅速缓解。

He had never been abroad himself but had always dreamed of going there.

他自己从未出过国，但一直梦想着去那里。

With maps and books of travel Judith and he had planned it out.

朱迪思和他用地图和旅行书籍计划好了这一切。

In imagination they had lived in London and Paris, Munich and Rome, always in queer old lodgings looking on quaint crooked streets.

在想象中，他们曾住在伦敦、巴黎、慕尼黑和罗马，总是住在奇怪的老住所里，看着古色古香的弯曲街道。

He had dreamed of long delicious rambles, glimpses into queer old shops, vast, silent, dark cathedrals.

他梦想着能进行一次漫长而愉快的漫步，瞥见奇怪的老商店，巨大、寂静、黑暗的大教堂。

For Laura how different it would be.

对于劳拉来说，情况会有多么不同。

This boy of hers knew Europe as a group of gorgeous new hotels.

她的这个男孩知道欧洲是一群华丽的新酒店。

The moment Laura joined them, her father's eye was caught and held by the ring upon her finger.

劳拉一加入他们，她父亲的目光就被她手指上的戒指吸引住了。

Roger knew rings, they were his hobby, and this huge yellow solitaire in its new and brilliant setting at once awakened his dislike.

罗杰了解戒指，它们是他的爱好，而这颗巨大的黄色单石戒指在其新的、辉煌的环境中立刻引起了他的厌恶。

It just fitted the life they were to lead!

这正好适合他们要过的生活！

What life?

什么生活？

As he listened to his daughter he kept wondering if she were so sure.

当他听着女儿的话时，他一直想知道她是否这么确定。

Had she felt no uneasiness?

她没有感到不安吗？

She must have, he decided, for all her gay excitement.

他断定，她一定是因为她的快乐兴奋而这么做的。

One Laura in that smiling face; another Laura deep inside, doubting and uncertain, reaching for her happiness, now elated, now dismayed, exclaiming, "Now at last I'm starting!" Oh, what an ignorant child she was.

一张笑脸中的劳拉；另一个劳拉内心深处，怀疑和不确定，追求她的幸福，时而兴高采烈，时而沮丧，惊呼：“现在我终于开始了！”唉，真是个无知的孩子啊。

He wanted to cry out to her, "You'll _always_ be just starting!

他想对她大喊：“你永远都只是刚刚开始！

You'll never be sure, you'll never be happy, you'll always be just beginning to be!

你永远不会确定，你永远不会快乐，你永远只是刚刚开始！

And the happier you are, the more you will feel it is only a start!...

而你越幸福，你就越会觉得这只是一个开始！...

And then-"

然后——”

More and more his spirit withdrew from these two heedless children.

他的精神越来越远离这两个粗心的孩子。

Later on, when Deborah came, he barely noticed her meeting with Sloane.

后来，当黛博拉来的时候，他几乎没有注意到她与斯隆的会面。

And through dinner, while they talked of plans for the wedding, the trip abroad, still Roger took no part at all.

晚餐时，当他们谈论婚礼和出国旅行的计划时，罗杰仍然没有参与。

He felt dull and heavy.

他感到沉闷而沉重。

Deborah too, he noticed, after her first efforts to be welcoming and friendly, had gradually grown silent.

他注意到黛博拉也是如此，在她最初努力表示欢迎和友好之后，她逐渐变得沉默寡言。

He saw her watching Laura with a mingled look of affection and of whimsical dismay.

他看到她看着劳拉，眼神中夹杂着深情和异想天开的沮丧。

Soon after dinner she left them, and Roger smoked with the boy for a while and learned that he was twenty-nine.

晚餐后不久，她就离开了他们，罗杰和男孩一起抽烟了一会儿，得知他二十九岁了。

Both had grown uneasy and rather dull with each other.

两人都变得不安，彼此都变得迟钝。

It was a relief when again Laura joined them, dressed to go out.

当劳拉再次加入他们，穿好衣服准备出去时，我松了口气。

She and her lover left the house.

她和她的爱人离开了家。

Roger sat motionless for some time.

罗杰一动不动地坐了一会儿。

His cigar grew cold unheeded.

他的雪茄在无人理会的情况下变冷了。

One of the sorrows of his life had been that his only son had died.

他一生的悲伤之一是他唯一的儿子去世了。

Bruce had been almost like a son.

布鲁斯几乎就像一个儿子。

But this young man of Laura's?

但是劳拉的这个年轻人呢？

No.

不。

Later he went for his evening walk.

后来他去晚上散步。

And as though drawn by invisible chains he strayed far down into the ghetto.

他仿佛被无形的锁链牵引着，误入了贫民窟的深处。

Soon he was elbowing his way through a maze of uproarious tenement streets as one who had been there many times.

很快，他就像一个来过很多次的人一样，挤过一片喧闹的廉价公寓街道。

But he noticed little around him.

但他很少注意到周围的情况。

He went on, as he had always gone, seeing and hearing this seething life only as a background to his own adventure.

他继续往前走，看到和听到的这种沸腾的生活只是他自己冒险的背景。

He reached his destination.

他到达了目的地。

Pushing his way through a swarm of urchins playing in front of a pawnshop, he entered and was a long time inside, and when he came out again at last the whole expression of his face had undergone a striking change.

他穿过一群在当铺前玩耍的顽童，走进去，在里面呆了很长时间，当他终于再次出来时，他的整个表情发生了惊人的变化。

As one who had found the solace he needed for the moment, his pace unconsciously quickened and he looked about him with brighter eyes.

得到了暂时慰藉的他，脚步不自觉的加快，环视四周的目光更加明亮。

Around the corner from his home, he went into a small jewelry shop, a remnant of the town of the past.

在他家的拐角处，他走进了一家小珠宝店，这是过去小镇的遗迹。

There were no customers in the place, and the old Galician jeweler sat at the back playing solitaire.

店里没有顾客，老加利西亚珠宝商坐在后面玩纸牌游戏。

At sight of Roger he arose; and presently in a small back room, beneath the glare of a powerful lamp, the two were studying the ring which Roger had found in the ghetto that night.

一看到罗杰，他就站了起来。不久，在后面的一间小房间里，在强光照射下，两人正在研究罗杰那天晚上在贫民区发现的戒指。

It was plain, just a thin worn band of gold with an emerald by no means large; but the setting was old and curious, and personal, distinctive.

它很朴素，只是一条薄薄的、磨损的金带，上面镶嵌着一颗并不大的祖母绿。但这里的环境古老而奇特，而且个性化、独特。

Somebody over in Europe had worked on it long and lovingly.

欧洲有人对此进行了长期而热情的研究。

Now as the Galician gently rubbed and polished and turned the ring this way and that, the light revealed crude tiny figures, a man and a woman under a tree.

现在，当加利西亚人轻轻地擦拭、抛光并左右转动戒指时，光线显露出粗糙的微小人物，树下的一个男人和一个女人。

And was that a vine or a serpent?

那是藤蔓还是蛇？

They studied it long and absorbedly.

他们全神贯注地研究了很长时间。

At home, up in his bedroom, Roger opened a safe which stood in one corner, took out a large shallow tray and sat down with it by his lamp.

回到家里，在他的卧室里，罗杰打开角落里的一个保险箱，拿出一个大浅托盘，坐在灯边。

A strange array of rings was there, small and delicate, huge, bizarre; great signet rings and poison rings, love tokens, charms and amulets, rings which had been worn by wives, by mistresses, by favorite slaves and by young girls in convents; rings with the Madonna and rings with many other saints graven on large heavy stones; rings French and Russian, Polish, Italian, Spanish, Syrian.

那里有一排奇怪的圆环，小而精致，巨大而奇异。伟大的图章戒指和毒戒指，爱情信物，护身符和护身符，妻子、情妇、最喜欢的奴隶和修道院里的年轻女孩所佩戴的戒指；与麦当娜的戒指和许多其他圣人的戒指刻在大而重的石头上；法语、俄语、波兰语、意大利语、西班牙语、叙利亚语。

Some were many centuries old.

有些已经有好几个世纪的历史了。

In nine shallow metal trays they filled the safe in Roger's room.

它们装在九个浅金属托盘里，装满了罗杰房间的保险箱。

Although its money value was small, the Gale collection was well known to a scattered public of connoisseurs, and Roger took pride in showing it.

虽然它的钱币价值不大，但盖尔的藏品却为分散的鉴赏家所熟知，罗杰以展示它为荣。

But what had always appealed to him most was the romance, the mystery, stored up in these old talismans that had lived so many ages, travelled through so many lands, decked so many fingers.

但最吸引他的是那些古老的护身符中所蕴藏的浪漫和神秘，这些护身符已经存在了这么多年，走过了这么多的土地，装饰了这么多的手指。

Roger had found every one of them in the pawnshops of New York.

罗杰在纽约的当铺找到了他们每一个人。

What new recruits to America had brought them here and pawned them?

是什么新来美国的人把它们带到这里并典当了它们？

From what old cities had they come?

他们来自哪些古老的城市？

What passions of love and jealousy, of hatred, faith, devotion were in this glittering array?

在这闪闪发光的阵列中，有哪些爱与嫉妒、仇恨、信仰、奉献的激情？

Roger's own love affair had been deep, but quiet and even and happy.

罗杰自己的爱情很深厚，但安静、均匀、幸福。

All the wild adventures, the might-have-beens in his sex life, were gathered in these dusky trays with their richly colored glints of light.

他性生活中所有的疯狂冒险和可能发生的事情，都聚集在这些闪烁着色彩丰富光芒的昏暗托盘中。

Of his daughters, Laura had been the one most interested in his rings, and so he thought of Laura now as he placed in the tray the new ring he had bought, the one he would have liked for her.

在他的女儿们中，劳拉是对他的戒指最感兴趣的一个，所以当他把买的新戒指放在托盘里时，他现在想起了劳拉，这是他想要送给她的一枚。

But a vague uneasiness filled his mind, for he knew she had the same craving as he for what gleamed out of these somber trays.

但他心里却充满了隐约的不安，因为他知道她和他一样渴望这些阴暗的托盘中闪闪发光的东西。

The old Galician jeweler had long been quite a friend of hers, she had often dropped in at his shop to ask him curious questions about his women patrons.

这位加利西亚老珠宝商长期以来一直是她的好朋友，她经常去他的店里问他一些关于女顾客的好奇问题。

And it was just this side of him that Roger did not care for.

罗杰并不关心他的这一面。

So many of those women were from a dubious glittering world, and the old Galician took a weird vicarious joy in many of the gay careers into which he sent his beloved rings, his brooches, earrings, necklaces, his clasps and diamond garters.

这些女人中有很多来自一个可疑的闪闪发光的世界，而这位老加利西亚人在许多同性恋职业中都获得了一种奇怪的替代快乐，他把他心爱的戒指、他的胸针、耳环、项链、他的扣子和钻石吊袜带送入其中。

And Laura loved to make him talk....

劳拉喜欢让他说话......

Yes, she was her father's child, a part of himself.

是的，她是她父亲的孩子，是他父亲的一部分。

He, too, had had his yearnings, his burning curiosities, his youthful ventures into the town.

他也曾有过他的渴望、他强烈的好奇心、他年轻时进城的冒险经历。

"You will live on in our children's lives." With her inheritance what would she do?

“你将继续活在我们孩子的生活中。”有了她的遗产，她会做什么？

Would she stop halfway as he had done, or would she throw all caution aside and let the flames within her rise?

她会像他那样半途而废，还是会抛开所有的谨慎，让内心的火焰熊熊燃烧？

He heard a step in the doorway, and Deborah stood there smiling.

他听到门口有脚步声，黛博拉微笑着站在那里。

"A new one?" she inquired.

“一个新的？”她询问道。

He nodded, and she bent over the tray.

他点点头，她俯身在托盘上。

"Poor father," Deborah murmured.

“可怜的父亲，”黛博拉低声说道。

"I saw you eyeing Laura's engagement ring at dinner to-night.

“我看到你在今晚的晚餐上盯着劳拉的订婚戒指。

It wasn't like this one, was it?" He scowled:

和这个不一样，是吗？”他皱起眉头：

"I don't like what I see ahead of her.

“我不喜欢在她面前看到的一切。

Nor do you," he said.

你也不知道，”他说。

"Be honest." She looked at him perplexedly.

“说实话。”她困惑地看着他。

"We can't stop it, can we?

“我们无法阻止它，不是吗？

And even if we could," she said, "I'm not quite sure I'd want to.

即使我们可以，”她说，“我也不太确定我是否愿意这样做。

It's her love affair, not yours or mine--grown out of a life she made for herself--curious, eager, thrilled by it all--and in the center of her soul the deep glad growing certainty, 'I'm going to be a beautiful woman--I myself, I, Laura Gale!' Oh, you don't know--nor do I.

这是她的爱情，不是你的，也不是我的——源于她为自己创造的生活——好奇、渴望、对这一切感到兴奋——在她灵魂的中心，一种深深的、快乐的、不断增长的确定性，“我将成为一个美丽的女人——我自己，我，劳拉·盖尔！”哦，你不知道——我也不知道。

And so she felt her way along--eagerly, hungrily, making mistakes--and you and I left her to do it alone.

就这样，她摸索着前行——急切地、饥渴地、犯错误——而你和我就让她独自完成。

I'm afraid we both rather neglected her, dad," Deborah ended sadly.

恐怕我们都忽视了她，爸爸，”黛博拉悲伤地结束了。

"And all we can do now, I think, is to give her the kind of wedding she wants."

“我想，我们现在能做的就是为她举办一场她想要的婚礼。”

Roger started to speak but hesitated.

罗杰想要说话，但犹豫了。

"What is it?" she inquired.

“那是什么？”她询问道。

"Queer," he answered gruffly, "how a man can neglect his children--as I have done, as I do still--when the one thing he wants most in life is to see each one of 'em happy."

“奇怪，”他粗声粗气地回答，“一个男人怎么能忽视他的孩子们——就像我曾经做过的那样，现在仍然如此——而他一生中最想要的一件事就是看到他们每个人都幸福。”

CHAPTER VI

第六章

Roger soon grew accustomed to seeing young Sloane about the house.

罗杰很快就习惯了在房子里见到年轻的斯隆。

They could talk together more easily, and he began to call him Harold.

他们可以更轻松地交谈，他开始叫他哈罗德。

Harold asked him with Laura to lunch at the Ritz to meet the aunt from Bridgeport, a lady excessively stout and profound.

哈罗德请他和劳拉一起去丽兹酒店吃午饭，去见布里奇波特的阿姨，一位身材粗壮、深沉的女士。

But that ended the formalities.

但手续就这样结束了。

It had all been so much easier than Roger had expected.

一切比罗杰预想的要容易得多。

So, in its calm sober fashion, the old house took into its life this new member, these new plans, and the old seemed stronger for the new--for Laura and Edith and Deborah drew together closer than they had been in many years.

于是，老房子以其平静、清醒的方式融入了这个新成员、这些新计划的生命中，旧的似乎比新的更强大——因为劳拉、伊迪丝和黛博拉比多年来更加亲密。

But only because they felt themselves on the eve of a still deeper and more lasting separation, as the family of Roger Gale divided and went different ways.

但这只是因为他们感到自己正处于更深、更持久的分离的前夕，罗杰·盖尔的家人分裂并走上了不同的道路。

At times he noticed it sadly.

有时他悲伤地注意到这一点。

Laura, who had scarcely ever been home for dinner, now spent many evenings here.

劳拉几乎没有回家吃过晚饭，现在却在这里度过了许多个夜晚。

She needed her home for her wedding, he thought.

他想，她需要自己的家来举办婚礼。

Each daughter needed it now and then.

每个女儿时不时都需要它。

But as the years wore slowly on, the seasons when they needed it grew steadily wider and wider apart....

但随着岁月的流逝，他们需要的季节越来越宽......

Early in May, when Roger came home from his office one night he found Edith's children in the house.

五月初，一天晚上罗杰从办公室回家时，发现伊迪丝的孩子们在家里。

From the hallway he could hear their gay excited voices, and going into the dining room he found them at their supper.

从走廊里他能听到他们欢快兴奋的声音，走进餐厅，他发现他们正在吃晚饭。

Deborah was with them, and at once her father noticed how much younger she appeared--as she always did with these children who all idolized her so.

黛博拉和他们在一起，她父亲立刻注意到她看起来年轻了很多——就像她总是对这些孩子们所做的那样，他们都如此崇拜她。

She rose and followed him into the hall, and her quiet voice had a note of compassion.

她起身跟着他走进了大厅，平静的声音里带着一丝怜悯。

"Edith's baby is coming," she said.

“伊迪丝的孩子就要出生了，”她说。

"Good Lord.

“好主啊。

Is anything wrong?" he asked.

有什么事吗？”他问道。

"No, no, it's all right--"

“不，不，没关系——”

"But I thought the child wasn't due for three weeks."

“但我认为孩子三周后就出生了。”

"I know, and poor Edith is fearfully worried.

“我知道，可怜的伊迪丝非常担心。

It has upset all her plans.

打乱了她所有的计划。

I'd go up and see her if I were you.

如果我是你，我就会上去见她。

Your supper is ready; and if you like you can have it with the children."

你的晚餐准备好了；如果你愿意的话，你可以和孩子们一起吃。”

There followed a happy boisterous meal, with much expectant chatter about the long summer so soon to begin at the farm up in the mountains.

接下来是一顿欢乐热闹的晚餐，人们满怀期待地谈论着山上农场即将开始的漫长夏天。

George, whose hair was down over his eyes, rumpled it back absorbedly as he told of a letter he had received from his friend Dave Royce, Roger's farmer, with whom George corresponded.

乔治的头发垂下来遮住了眼睛，他全神贯注地把头发揉乱在脑后，他讲述了他从朋友戴夫·罗伊斯那里收到的一封信，戴夫·罗伊斯是罗杰的农场主，乔治曾与戴夫·罗伊斯有过书信往来。

One of the cows was to have a calf, and George was anxious to get there in time.

其中一头母牛要生一头小牛，乔治急于及时赶到那里。

"I've never seen a real new calf, new absolutely," he explained.

“我从来没有见过真正的新小牛，绝对是新的，”他解释道。

"And I want a look at this one the very minute that he's born.

“我想在他出生的那一刻就看看这个。

Gee, I hope we can get there in time--"

哎呀，我希望我们能及时赶到——”

"Gee!

“哎呀！

So do I!" cried Bobby aged nine.

我也一样！”九岁的鲍比喊道。

And then Tad, the chubby three-year-old who had been intently watching his brothers, slowly took the spoon from his mouth and in his grave sweet baby voice said very softly, "Gee." At her end of the table, Elizabeth, blonde and short and rather plump, frowned and colored slightly.

然后，泰德，这个胖乎乎的三岁孩子，一直专注地看着他的兄弟们，慢慢地从嘴里拿走了勺子，用他低沉而甜美的婴儿声音非常轻柔地说：“哎呀。”桌子那头的伊丽莎白，金发碧眼，身材矮小，身材有些胖，皱着眉头，脸色微微泛红。

For she was eleven and she knew there was something dark and shameful about the way calves appear in barns.

因为她十一岁了，她知道小牛出现在谷仓里的方式是黑暗和可耻的。

And so, with a quick conscious cough, she sweetly interrupted:

于是，她有意识地快速咳嗽了一下，甜甜地打断道：

"Oh, Aunt Deborah!

“噢，黛博拉阿姨！

Won't you please tell us about--about--"

请你告诉我们关于——关于——”

"About--about," jeered the ironical George.

“大约——大约，”讽刺的乔治嘲笑道。

"About what, you little ninny?" Poor Elizabeth blushed desperately.

“关于什么，你这个小笨蛋？”可怜的伊丽莎白脸红得厉害。

She was neither quick nor resourceful.

她既不敏捷也不足智多谋。

"Now, George," said his aunt warningly.

“现在，乔治，”他姨妈警告地说。

"Wasn't I talking?" the boy rejoined.

“我不是在说话吗？”男孩又加入了。

"And didn't Betsy butt right in--without even a thing to butt in about?

“贝特西不是直接插了进去——甚至没有什么可插的吗？

About--about," he jeered again.

大约——大约，”他再次嘲笑道。

"About Paris!" cried his sister, successful at last in her frantic search for a proper topic of conversation.

“关于巴黎！”他的妹妹喊道，她疯狂地寻找合适的谈话话题，终于成功了。

"Aunt Deborah's trip to Paris!"

“黛博拉阿姨的巴黎之旅！”

"How many times has she told it already?" her brother replied with withering scorn.

“她已经说过多少遍了？”她哥哥用极其轻蔑的语气回答道。

"And anyhow, I was talking of cows!"

“无论如何，我说的是牛！”

"Very well," said his aunt, "we'll talk about cows, some cows I saw on a lovely old farm in a little village over in France."

“很好，”他的姨妈说，“我们来谈谈奶牛，我在法国一个小村庄的一个可爱的老农场里看到的一些奶牛。”

"There!" cried his young sister.

“那里！”他的妹妹叫道。

"Did she ever tell of _that_ part of her trip?" And she made a little face at her brother.

“她有没有讲过她旅行的那一部分？”她对她哥哥做了个小鬼脸。

"I don't care," he answered doggedly.

“我不在乎，”他固执地回答。

"She has told about Paris lots of times--and that was what _you_ wanted.

“她已经多次讲述过巴黎——而这正是你想要的。

Yes, you did.

是的，你做到了。

You said, 'About Paris.' Didn't she, Bob?"

你说，“关于巴黎。”她不是吗，鲍勃？”

"You bet she did," young Bob agreed.

“你敢打赌她做到了，”年轻的鲍勃同意道。

"Now, children, children, what does it matter?"

“现在，孩子们，孩子们，这有什么关系呢？”

"All right, go ahead with your barn in France," said George with patient tolerance.

“好吧，继续处理你在法国的谷仓吧。”乔治耐心地说道。

"Did they have any Holsteins?"

“他们有荷斯坦牛吗？”

Soon the questions were popping from every side, while little Tad beamed from one to the other.

很快，问题从四面八方涌来，而小泰德则从一处到另一处微笑着。

To Tad it was all so wonderful, to be having supper away from home, to be here, to go to bed upstairs, to take part perhaps in a pillow fight....

对泰德来说，一切都是那么美妙，离开家吃晚饭，来到这里，上楼睡觉，也许参加一场枕头大战……

And glancing at the glowing face and the parted lips of his small grandson Roger felt a current of warm new life pour into his soul.

看着他小孙子罗杰容光焕发的脸和张开的嘴唇，一股温暖的新生命涌入他的灵魂。

Early in the evening he went up to Edith's apartment.

傍晚时分，他去了伊迪丝的公寓。

He found his daughter in her room, looking flushed and very tense.

他发现女儿在她的房间里，脸色通红，非常紧张。

He took her arm and they walked for a time.

他挽着她的手臂，他们走了一会儿。

A trained nurse was soaping the windows.

一名训练有素的护士正在给窗户擦肥皂。

Roger asked the reason for this and was told that in case the baby did not come till morning the doctor wanted to pull up the shades in order to work by daylight.

罗杰询问原因，并被告知如果婴儿直到早上才出生，医生想拉起窗帘以便在白天工作。

"And neighbors in New York are such cats!

“纽约的邻居都是这样的猫！

You've no idea!" said Edith.

你根本不知道！”伊迪丝说。

She looked out at the numberless windows crowding close about her home, and she fairly bristled with scorn.

她看着窗外，无数的窗户挤满了她的家，她心中充满了轻蔑。

"Oh, how I loathe apartments!"

“哦，我多么讨厌公寓啊！”

"They seem to have come to stay, my dear.

“他们似乎是来留下来的，亲爱的。

In a few years more New York will be a city without a house," he said.

再过几年，纽约将成为一座没有房子的城市，”他说。

"Only a palace here and there." The thought flashed in his mind, "But I shall be gone."

“到处只有一座宫殿。”他脑子里闪过一个念头：“但我会走了。”

"Then we'll move out to the country!" she cried.

“那我们就搬到乡下去吧！”她哭了。

Still walking the floor with her father, she talked of the perplexities which in her feverish state of mind had loomed suddenly enormous.

她仍然和父亲一起走在地板上，谈到了在她狂热的精神状态下突然出现的巨大困惑。

She had planned everything so nicely for the baby to come the first of June, but now her plans were all upset.

她为六月一号孩子的出生精心策划了一切，但现在她的计划全被打乱了。

She did not want the children here, it would make too much confusion.

她不想让孩子们在这里，那样会造成太多混乱。

They had much better go up to the mountains, even though George and Elizabeth lost their last few weeks at school.

尽管乔治和伊丽莎白在学校度过了最后几周的时光，但他们还是最好去山上。

But who could she find to take them?

但她能找到谁来带走它们呢？

Bruce was simply rushed to death with his new receivership.

布鲁斯在他的新接管人职位上被匆匆送死。

Laura was getting her trousseau.

劳拉正在挑选嫁妆。

Deborah, said Edith, had time for nothing on earth but school.

伊迪丝说，黛博拉除了上学之外，没有时间做任何事。

"Suppose I take them," Roger ventured.

“假设我拿走它们，”罗杰大胆地说。

But she only smiled at this.

但她对此只是微笑。

"My dear," he urged, "your nurse will be with me, and when we arrive there's the farmer's wife." But Edith impatiently shook her head.

“亲爱的，”他催促道，“你的护士会和我在一起，当我们到达时，农夫的妻子就在那里。”但伊迪丝不耐烦地摇摇头。

Her warm bright eyes seemed to picture it all, hour by hour, day and night, her children there without her.

她温暖而明亮的眼睛似乎描绘了这一切，一小时又一小时，白天和黑夜，她的孩子们在那里，而她却没有。

"You poor dear," she told him, "you haven't the slightest idea what it means.

“你可怜的亲爱的，”她告诉他，“你根本不知道这意味着什么。

The summer train is not on yet, and you have to change three times on the way--with all the children--luggage, too.

夏季火车还没有开，你和所有的孩子在途中还得换三次行李。

And there are their naps, and all their meals.

还有他们的午睡和所有的膳食。

You don't arrive till late at night.

你直到深夜才到达。

No," she decided firmly, "Bruce will simply have to go." She drew a breath of discomfort.

不，”她坚定地决定，“布鲁斯必须走。”她不自在地吸了一口气。

"You go and talk to him," she said.

“你去跟他谈谈，”她说。

"I will, my dear." Roger looked at his daughter in deep concern.

“我会的，亲爱的。”罗杰深感关切地看着自己的女儿。

Awkwardly his heavy hand touched her small plump shoulder, and he felt the constant quivering there.

他笨重的手笨拙地碰上了她丰满的小肩膀，感觉到那里不断的颤抖。

"Now, now," he muttered, uneasily, "it's going to be all right, you know--" And at that she gave him a rapid glance out of those warm hunted eyes, as though to ask, "What do you know of this?" And Roger flinched and turned to the door.

“现在，现在，”他不安地咕哝道，“一切都会好起来的，你知道——”这时，她用那双温暖的、猎奇的眼睛飞快地看了他一眼，仿佛在问，“你对这件事知道什么？”罗杰退缩了一下，转身向门口走去。

Bruce was working at his desk, with an old briar pipe in his teeth.

布鲁斯正在办公桌前工作，嘴里叼着一根旧石南木烟斗。

He looked up with a quick nervous smile which showed his dread of the coming ordeal, but his voice had a carefully casual tone.

他抬起头，脸上露出一丝紧张的微笑，这表明他对即将到来的磨难感到恐惧，但他的声音却带着一种小心翼翼的随意语气。

"Does she want me now?" he asked.

“她现在想要我吗？”他问道。

"No," said Roger.

“不，”罗杰说。

And he told of her plan for the children.

他还讲述了她对孩子们的计划。

"I volunteered myself," he added, "but she wouldn't hear to it."

“我自告奋勇，”他补充道，“但她不听。”

"Oh, my God, man, you wouldn't do," said Bruce, in droll disparagement.

“哦，天哪，伙计，你不会这么做的，”布鲁斯滑稽地轻蔑地说。

"You with forty-nine bottles of pasteurized milk?

“你有四十九瓶巴氏杀菌牛奶吗？

Suppose you smashed one?

假设你砸坏了一个？

Where'd you be?

你在哪儿？

Moving our family isn't a job; it's a science, and I've got my degree." He rose and his face softened.

搬家不是工作，而是工作。这是一门科学，我已经拿到了学位。”他站了起来，脸色柔和下来。

"Poor girl, she mustn't worry like that.

“可怜的姑娘，她不应该这么担心。

I'll run in and tell her I'll do it myself--just to get it off her mind."

我会跑进去告诉她我会自己做——只是为了让她忘记这件事。”

He went to his wife.

他去找他的妻子。

And when he came back his dark features appeared a little more drawn.

当他回来时，他黝黑的面容显得更加憔悴了一些。

"Poor devil," thought Roger, "he's scared to death--just as I used to be myself."

“可怜的家伙，”罗杰想，“他吓得要死——就像我以前一样。”

"Pretty tough on a woman, isn't it?" Bruce muttered, smiling constrainedly.

“对一个女人来说，太严厉了，不是吗？”布鲁斯嘟囔着，勉强笑了笑。

"Did Baird say everything's going well?" Baird was Edith's physician.

“贝尔德说一切顺利吗？”贝尔德是伊迪丝的医生。

"Yes.

“是的。

He was here this afternoon, and he said he'd be back this evening." Bruce stopped with a queer little scowl of suspense.

他今天下午来了，他说他今晚会回来。”布鲁斯停了下来，脸上带着一丝悬疑的奇怪的皱眉。

"I told her I'd see to the trip with the kiddies, and it seemed to relieve her a lot." His eye went to a pile of documents that lay on the desk before him.

“我告诉她我会照顾孩子们的旅行，这似乎让她松了一口气。”他的目光落在面前桌子上的一堆文件上。

"It'll play the very devil with business, taking three days off just now.

“现在就休息三天，这对生意来说会很糟糕。

But I guess I can manage it somehow--"

但我想我能以某种方式处理它——”

A muscle began to twitch on his face.

他脸上的一块肌肉开始抽搐。

He re-lit his pipe with elaborate care and looked over at Roger confidingly:

他小心翼翼地重新点燃了烟斗，充满信任地看着罗杰：

"Do you know what's the matter with kids these days?

“你知道现在的孩子们都怎么了吗？

It's the twentieth century," he said.

现在是二十世纪，”他说。

"It's a disease.

“这是一种疾病。

It starts in their teeth.

它始于他们的牙齿。

No modern girl can get married unless she has had her teeth straightened for years.

现代女孩除非多年矫正牙齿，否则无法结婚。

Our dentist's bill, this year alone, was over eight hundred dollars.

仅今年一年，我们的牙医账单就超过八百美元。

But that isn't all.

但这还不是全部。

It gets into their young intestines, God bless 'em, and makes you pasteurize all they eat.

它进入了他们幼小的肠道，上帝保佑他们，让你对他们吃的所有东西进行巴氏消毒。

It gets into their nerves and tears 'em up, and your only chance to save 'em is school--not a common school but a 'simple' school, tuition four hundred dollars a year.

这让他们心烦意乱，泪流满面，而拯救他们的唯一机会就是学校——不是普通学校，而是一所“简单”学校，学费每年四百美元。

And you hire a dancing teacher besides--I mean a rhythm teacher--and let 'em shake it out of their feet.

此外，你还聘请了一名舞蹈老师——我的意思是节奏老师——让他们摆脱困境。

And after that you buy 'em clothes--not fluffy clothes, but 'simple' clothes, the kind which always cost the most.

然后你就买衣服——不是蓬松的衣服，而是“简单”的衣服，那种总是最贵的。

And then you build a simple home, in a simple place like Morristown.

然后你在莫里斯敦这样简单的地方建造一个简单的家。

The whole idea is simplicity.

整个想法很简单。

If you can't make enough to buy it, you're lost.

如果你赚不到足够的钱来购买它，你就输了。

If you can make enough, just barely enough, you get so excited you lose your head--and do what I did Monday."

如果你能赚到足够的钱，只是勉强够，你就会兴奋得失去理智——然后做我周一做的事情。”

The two men smiled at each other.

两个人相视一笑。

Roger was very fond of Bruce.

罗杰非常喜欢布鲁斯。

"What did you do Monday?" he asked.

“周一你做了什么？”他问道。

"I bought that car I told you about."

“我跟你说过的那辆车是我买的。”

"Splendid!

“太棒了！

Best thing in the world for you!

世界上最好的事情给你！

Tell me all about it!"

全部告诉我吧！”

And while Bruce rapidly grew engrossed in telling of the car's fine points, Roger pictured his son-in-law upon hot summer evenings (for Bruce spent his summers in town) forgetting his business for a time and speeding out into the country.

当布鲁斯很快全神贯注地讲述这辆车的优点时，罗杰想象着他的女婿在炎热的夏夜（因为布鲁斯在城里度过了夏天）暂时忘记了自己的事情，加速前往乡村。

Then he thought of Edith and the tyranny of her motherhood, always draining her husband's purse and keeping Edith so wrapt up in her children and their daily needs that she had lost all interest in anything outside her home.

然后他想到了伊迪丝和她母亲的专制，她总是耗尽丈夫的钱包，让伊迪丝如此专注于她的孩子和他们的日常需求，以至于她对家以外的任何事情都失去了兴趣。

What was there wrong about it?

这其中有什么问题吗？

He knew that Edith prided herself on being like her mother.

他知道伊迪丝为自己像她母亲而感到自豪。

But Judith had always found time for her friends.

但朱迪思总能抽出时间陪伴她的朋友们。

He himself had been more as Edith was now.

他本人就更像现在的伊迪丝了。

How quickly after Judith died he had dropped all friends, all interests.

朱迪思去世后，他很快就抛弃了所有的朋友和所有的兴趣。

"That's it," he ruefully told himself, "Edith takes after her father." And the same curious feeling which he had had with Laura, came back to him with her sister.

“就是这样，”他悲伤地告诉自己，“伊迪丝像她父亲。”他对劳拉产生的同样好奇的感觉又回到了他对她姐姐的身上。

This daughter, too, was a part of himself.

这个女儿，也是他自己的一部分。

His deep instinctive craving to keep to himself and his family was living on in Edith, was already dominating her home.

他本能地渴望与自己和家人继续生活在伊迪丝，这种渴望已经主导了她的家。

What a queer mysterious business it was, this tie between a man and his child.

一个男人和他的孩子之间的这种联系是一件多么奇怪又神秘的事情啊。

He was thinking of this when Baird arrived.

当贝尔德到达时，他正在考虑这个问题。

Allan Baird was not only the doctor who had brought Edith's children into the world, he was besides an intimate friend, he had been Bruce's room-mate at college.

艾伦·贝尔德不仅是把伊迪丝的孩子带到这个世界上的医生，他也是一位亲密的朋友，他还是布鲁斯在大学时的室友。

As he came strolling into the room with his easy greeting of "Well, folks--" his low gruff voice, his muscular frame, over six feet two, and the kindly calm assurance in his lean strong visage, gave to Bruce and Roger the feeling of safety they needed.

当他慢悠悠地走进房间时，他轻松地打招呼说：“好吧，朋友们——”他低沉粗暴的声音，他身高超过六英尺二的肌肉发达的身躯，以及他瘦削而坚强的面容中亲切而平静的保证，给了布鲁斯和罗杰他们所需要的安全感。

For this kind of work was his life.

因为这种工作就是他的生命。

He had specialized on women, and after over fifteen years of toilsome uphill labor he had become at thirty-seven one of the big gynecologists.

他专门研究女性，经过十五年的艰苦艰苦劳动，他在三十七岁时成为了一位大妇科医生。

He was taking his success with the quiet relish of a man who had had to work for it hard.

他以一种默默地享受着自己的成功，就像一个必须努力工作才能获得成功的人一样。

And yet he had not been spoiled by success.

然而他并没有被成功宠坏了。

He worked even harder than before--so hard, in fact, that Deborah, with whom through Bruce and Edith he had long ago struck up an easy bantering friendship, had sturdily set herself the task of prying open his eyes a bit.

他比以前更加努力了——事实上，黛博拉很努力，以至于他很早以前就通过布鲁斯和伊迪丝与黛博拉建立了轻松的玩笑友谊，她坚定地给自己定下了撬开他眼睛的任务。

She had taken him to her school at night and to queer little foreign cafés.

晚上她带他去学校和奇怪的外国小咖啡馆。

And Baird, with a humor of his own, had retaliated by dragging her to the Astor Roof and to musical plays.

贝尔德以自己的幽默来报复，把她拖到阿斯特屋顶看音乐剧。

"If my eyes are to be opened," he had doggedly declared, "I propose to have some diamonds in the scenery, and a little cheery ragtime, too.

“如果我的眼睛要睁开，”他顽强地宣称，“我建议在风景中加入一些钻石，还有一点欢快的拉格泰姆。

You've got a good heart, Deborah Gale, but your head is full of tenements."

你有一颗善良的心，黛博拉·盖尔，但你的脑子里却装满了公寓。”

To-night to divert Bruce's thoughts from his wife, Baird started him talking of his work.

今晚，为了转移布鲁斯对妻子的思绪，贝尔德让他谈论他的工作。

In six weeks Bruce had crammed his mind with the details of skyscraper building, and his talk was bewildering now, bristling with technical terms, permeated through and through with the feeling of strain and fierce competition.

六个星期的时间里，布鲁斯的脑子里就塞满了摩天大楼的细节，而他的演讲现在却令人困惑，充满了技术术语，贯穿始终的紧张感和激烈的竞争。

As Roger listened he had again that sharp and oppressive sensation of a savage modern town unrelentingly pressing, pressing in.

罗杰听着，他再次感受到了一种尖锐而压抑的感觉，仿佛一座野蛮的现代城镇正在无情地逼近。

Restlessly he glanced at Baird who sat listening quietly.

他不安地看了一眼贝尔德，贝尔德坐在那儿静静地听着。

And Roger thought of the likeness between their two professions.

罗杰想到了他们两个职业之间的相似之处。

For Bruce, too, was a surgeon.

对于布鲁斯来说，也是一名外科医生。

His patients were the husbands in their distracting offices.

他的病人是那些在令人分心的办公室里工作的丈夫。

Baird's were the wives and mothers in their equally distracting homes.

贝尔德的妻子和母亲们都住在同样令人分心的家里。

Which were more tense, the husbands or wives?

丈夫和妻子谁更紧张？

And, good Lord, what was it all about, this feverish strain of getting and spending?

天哪，这种疯狂的获取和支出到底是怎么回事？

What were they spending?

他们花了什么钱？

Their very life's blood.

他们的生命之血。

And what were they getting?

他们得到了什么？

Happiness?

幸福？

What did most of them know of real happiness?

他们中的大多数人对真正的幸福了解多少？

How little they knew, how blind they were, and yet how they laughed and chattered along, how engrossed in their little games.

他们知道得多么少，他们多么盲目，但他们却一路笑着、喋喋不休，全神贯注于他们的小游戏。

What children, oh, what children!

多么好的孩子啊，多么好的孩子啊！

"And am I any better than the rest?

“我比其他人好吗？

Do I know what I'm after--what I'm about?"

我知道我在追求什么——我在做什么吗？”

He left them soon, for he felt very tired.

他很快就离开了他们，因为他感到很累。

He went to his daughter to say good-night.

他走到女儿跟前道晚安。

And in her room the talk he had heard became to him suddenly remote, that restless world of small account.

在她的房间里，他听到的谈话对他来说突然变得遥远，那个不安宁的小世界。

For in Edith, in the one brief hour since her father had seen her last, there had come a great transformation, into her face an eager light.

因为在伊迪丝身上，自从她父亲最后一次见到她以来的短短一个小时里，她发生了巨大的变化，脸上露出了渴望的光芒。

She was slipping down into a weird small world which for a brief but fearful season was to be utterly her own, with agony and bloody sweat, and joy and a deep mystery.

她正在滑入一个奇怪的小世界，在短暂而可怕的季节里，这个世界完全属于她自己，充满痛苦和血汗，快乐和深深的神秘。

Clumsily he took her hand.

他笨拙地握住了她的手。

It was moist and he felt it clutch his own.

它是湿的，他感觉它紧紧地抓住了他自己的。

He heard her breathing rapidly.

他听到她急促的呼吸声。

"Good-night," he said in a husky tone.

“晚安，”他用沙哑的声音说道。

"I'll be so glad, my dear, so glad."

“我会很高兴，亲爱的，非常高兴。”

For answer she gave him a hurried smile, a glance from her bright restless eyes.

作为回答，她匆忙地对他微笑，用她那双明亮不安的眼睛扫了一眼。

Then he went heavily from the room.

然后他重重地走出了房间。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

At home he found Deborah sitting alone, with a pile of school papers in her lap.

在家里，他发现黛博拉独自坐着，膝上放着一堆学校试卷。

As he entered she slowly turned her head.

当他进来时，她慢慢地转过头。

"How is Edith?" she asked him.

“伊迪丝怎么样？”她问他。

Roger told of his visit uptown, and spoke of Edith's anxiety over getting the children up to the farm.

罗杰讲述了他对住宅区的访问，并谈到伊迪丝对带孩子们去农场的焦虑。

"I'll take them myself," said Deborah.

“我自己去拿，”黛博拉说。

"But how can you get away from school?"

“但是你怎么能逃出学校呢？”

"Oh, I think I can manage it.

“哦，我想我能应付。

We'll leave on Friday morning and I can be back by Sunday night.

我们周五早上出发，周日晚上我就可以回来。

I'll love it," Deborah answered.

我会喜欢的，”黛博拉回答道。

"It'll be a great relief to her," said Roger, lighting a cigar.

“这对她来说是一种极大的解脱，”罗杰点燃一支雪茄说道。

Deborah resumed her work, and there was silence for a time.

黛博拉又继续干活，一阵沉默。

"I let George sit up with me till an hour after his bedtime," she told her father presently.

“我让乔治陪着我坐到他睡觉后一个小时，”她立即告诉父亲。

"We started talking about white rats--you see it's still white rats with George--and that started us wondering about God.

“我们开始谈论白老鼠——你看，和乔治在一起的仍然是白老鼠——这让我们开始思考上帝。

George wonders if God really knows about rats.

乔治想知道上帝是否真的了解老鼠。

'Has he ever stuck his face right down and had a good close look at one?

“他有没有低下头仔细观察过一个人？”

Has God ever watched a rat stand up and brush his whiskers with both paws?

上帝曾经见过一只老鼠站起来用两只爪子擦胡须吗？

Has he ever really laughed at rats?

他真的嘲笑过老鼠吗？

And that's another thing, Aunt Deborah--does God ever laugh at all?

还有一件事，黛博拉阿姨——上帝真的笑过吗？

Does he know how to take a joke?

他知道如何接受笑话吗？

If he don't, we might as well quit right now!'"

如果他不这样做，我们还不如现在就退出！”

Roger laughed with relish, and his daughter smiled at him:

罗杰津津有味地笑了，女儿也对他笑道：

"Then the talk turned from rats and God to a big dam out in the Rockies.

“然后话题从老鼠和上帝转向落基山脉的一座大坝。

George has been reading about it, he's thinking of being an engineer.

乔治一直在读这方面的内容，他正在考虑成为一名工程师。

And there was so much he wanted to know that he was soon upon the verge of discovering my ignorance--when all of a sudden a dreamy look, oh, a very dreamy look, came into his eyes--and he asked me this." And over her bright expressive face came a scowl of boyish intensity: "Suppose I _was_ an engineer--and I was working on a dam, or may be a bridge, in the Rockies.

他想知道的事情太多了，以至于他很快就会发现我的无知——突然，他的眼里闪现出一种梦幻般的神情，哦，非常梦幻的神情——他问了我这个。”她那张明亮而富于表情的脸上浮现出孩子气般强烈的皱眉：“假设我是一名工程师——我正在落基山脉的一座水坝上工作，或者可能是一座桥梁上的工作。

And say it was pretty far down south--say around the Grand Canyon.

假设它在南方很远的地方——比如在大峡谷周围。

I should think they'd need a dam down there, or anyhow a bridge,' said George.

我认为他们需要在那里建一座水坝，或者无论如何一座桥，”乔治说。

And he eyed me in a cautious way which said as plain as the nose on your face, 'Good Lord, she's only a woman, and she won't understand.' But I showed him I was serious, and he asked me huskily, 'Suppose it was winter, Aunt Deborah, and the Giants were in Texas.

他用一种谨慎的眼神看着我，就像你脸上的鼻子一样明白，“天啊，她只是个女人，她不会明白的。”但我向他表明我是认真的，他沙哑地问我，‘黛博拉阿姨，假设现在是冬天，巨人队在德克萨斯州。

Do you think I could get a few days off?' And then before he could tell me the Giants were a baseball nine, I said I was sure he could manage it.

你认为我可以休息几天吗？然后在他告诉我巨人队是棒球九人队之前，我说我确信他能做到。

You should have seen his face light up.

你应该看到他的脸容光焕发。

And he added very fervently, 'Gee, it must be wonderful to be an engineer out there!'"

他非常热切地补充道，‘哎呀，成为一名工程师一定很棒！’”

Roger chuckled delightedly and Deborah went on with her work.

罗杰高兴地笑了，黛博拉继续做她的工作。

"How good she is with young uns," he thought.

“她对年轻女孩真是太好了，”他想。

"What a knack she has of drawing 'em out.

“她有多么高超的把他们引出来的本领啊。

What a pity she hasn't some of her own."

可惜她没有自己的东西。”

He slept until late the next morning, and awoke to find Deborah by his bed.

他睡到很晚，第二天早上醒来，发现黛博拉在他的床边。

"It's another boy," she told him.

“这是另一个男孩，”她告诉他。

Roger sat up excitedly.

罗杰兴奋地坐了起来。

"Bruce has just telephoned the news.

“布鲁斯刚刚打电话通报了新闻。

The children and I have breakfasted, and they're going out with their nurse.

我和孩子们吃过早饭，他们要和护士一起出去。

Suppose you and I go up and see Bruce and settle this trip to the mountains."

假设你和我去见布鲁斯并解决这次山里之旅。”

About an hour later, arriving at Edith's apartment, they found Bruce downstairs with Allan Baird who was just taking his departure.

大约一个小时后，到达伊迪丝的公寓，他们发现布鲁斯和刚刚离开的艾伦·贝尔德在楼下。

Bruce's dark eyes shone with relief, but his hand was hot and nervous.

布鲁斯的黑眼睛闪烁着宽慰的光芒，但他的手又热又紧张。

Allan, on the contrary, held out to Edith's father a hand as steady and relaxed as was the bantering tone of his voice.

相反，艾伦向伊迪丝的父亲伸出了一只手，他的语气中充满了戏谑的语气，既稳定又放松。

"Bruce," he said, "has for once in his life decided to do something sensible.

“布鲁斯，”他说，“一生中第一次决定做一些明智的事情。

He's going to drop his wretched job and take a week off with his children."

他要辞掉那份糟糕的工作，和孩子们一起休息一周。”

"And worry every minute he's gone," Deborah retorted, "and come back and work day and night to catch up.

“他离开的每一分钟都让我担心，”黛博拉反驳道，“然后回来日夜工作以赶上进度。

But he isn't going to do it.

但他不会这么做。

I've decided to take the children myself."

我决定自己带孩子去。”

"You have?" cried Bruce delightedly.

“你有吗？”布鲁斯高兴地叫道。

"You'll do no such thing," said Allan, indignant.

“你不会做这样的事，”艾伦愤怒地说。

"Oh, you go to thunder," Bruce put in.

“哦，你去打雷了，”布鲁斯插嘴道。

"Haven't you any delicacy?

“你没有什么好吃的吗？

Can't you see this is no business of yours?"

你难道看不出来这不关你的事吗？”

"It isn't, eh," Allan sternly rejoined.

“不是的，呃，”艾伦严厉地回答道。

And of Deborah he demanded, "Didn't you say you'd go with me to 'Pinafore' this Saturday night?"

至于黛博拉，他问道：“你不是说这个周六晚上要和我一起去‘Pinafore’吗？”

"Ah," sneered Bruce.

“啊，”布鲁斯冷笑道。

"So that's your game.

“所以这就是你的游戏。

And for one little night of your pleasure you'd do me out of a week of my life!"

为了你的一个小小夜晚的快乐，你会用我生命中的一个星期来折磨我！”

"Like that," said Baird, with a snap of his fingers.

“就是这样，”贝尔德打了个响指说道。

"I'm going, though," said Deborah.

“不过我还是要去，”黛博拉说。

"Quite right, little woman," Bruce admonished her earnestly.

“说得对，小女人，”布鲁斯诚恳地告诫她。

"Don't let him rob you of your happiness."

“别让他夺走了你的幸福。”

"Come here," growled Baird to Deborah.

“过来，”贝尔德对黛博拉咆哮道。

She followed him into the living room, and Roger went upstairs with Bruce.

她跟着他走进客厅，罗杰和布鲁斯一起上楼。

"If he ever hopes to marry that girl," said Bruce, with an anxious backward glance, "he's got to learn to treat her with a little consideration."

“如果他希望娶那个女孩，”布鲁斯焦急地回头看了一眼，说道，“他就必须学会稍微体贴地对待她。”

"Quit your quarreling," Roger said.

“别再吵了，”罗杰说。

"What's a week in the mountains to you?

“在山里待一周对你来说意味着什么？

Hasn't your wife just risked her life?"

你的妻子不是冒着生命危险吗？”

"Sure she has," said Bruce feelingly.

“当然她有，”布鲁斯感慨地说。

"And I propose to stick by her, too."

“我也建议留在她身边。”

"Can I see her?"

“我可以见见她吗？”

"No, you can't--another of Baird's fool notions."

“不，你不能——贝尔德的又一个愚蠢想法。”

"Then where's the baby?"

“那孩子在哪儿？”

"Right in here."

“就在这里。”

Silently in front of the cradle Bruce and Roger stood looking down with the content which comes to men on such occasions when there is no woman by their side expecting them to say things.

布鲁斯和罗杰静静地站在摇篮前，低着头，在这种场合，当他们身边没有女人期待他们说话时，男人才会有这样的满足。

"I made it a rule in my family," Roger spoke up presently, "to have my first look at each child alone."

“我在家里定下了一条规矩，”罗杰很快开口说道，“第一次单独看每个孩子。”

"Same here," said Bruce.

“这里也一样，”布鲁斯说。

And they continued their silent communion.

他们继续进行无声的交流。

A few moments later, as they were leaving, Deborah came into the room and went softly to the cradle.

过了一会儿，当他们离开时，黛博拉走进房间，轻轻地走到摇篮旁。

Downstairs they found that Allan had gone, and when Deborah rejoined them she said she was going to stick to her plan.

下楼后，他们发现艾伦已经走了，当黛博拉重新加入他们时，她说她将坚持自己的计划。

It was soon arranged that she and the youngsters should start on their journey the following day.

很快就安排了她和孩子们第二天就出发。

Back at home she threw herself into the packing and was busy till late that night.

回到家，她就开始收拾行李，忙到深夜。

At daybreak she was up again, for they were to make an early start.

天一亮，她又起床了，因为他们要早起。

Bruce came with his new automobile, the children were all bundled in, together with Deborah and their nurse, and a half hour later at the train Bruce and Roger left them--Deborah flushed and happy, surrounded by luggage, wraps, small boys, an ice box, toys and picture books.

布鲁斯开着他的新车来了，孩子们和黛博拉以及他们的护士都被捆绑在一起，半小时后在火车上，布鲁斯和罗杰离开了他们——黛博拉脸红了，很高兴，周围都是行李、包裹、小男孩、冰盒、玩具和图画书。

The small red hat upon her head had already been jerked in a scrimmage, far down over one of her ears.

她头上的红色小帽子已经被拉得乱七八糟，远远盖住了她的一只耳朵。

"Don't worry about us, Bruce," she said.

“别担心我们，布鲁斯，”她说。

"We're going to have the time of our lives!" Bruce fairly beamed his gratitude.

“我们将会度过一生中最美好的时光！”布鲁斯流露出感激之情。

"If she don't marry," he declared, as he watched the train move slowly out, "there'll be a great mother wasted."

“如果她不结婚，”当他看着火车缓缓驶出时，他宣称，“一位伟大的母亲就会被浪费掉。”

CHAPTER VII

第七章

In the weeks which followed, Roger found the peace of his home so interrupted and disturbed by wedding preparations that often retreating into his den he earnestly told himself he was through, that a man with three grown daughters was a fool to show any sympathy with the utter folly of their lives.

在接下来的几周里，罗杰发现他家的平静被婚礼的准备工作打断和扰乱，他经常退回自己的小窝，真诚地告诉自己他已经结束了，一个拥有三个成年女儿的男人是个傻瓜，会对她们生活中的愚蠢行为表现出任何同情。

Yield an inch and they took a mile!

让步一英寸，他们就走了一英里！

It began one night when Deborah said,

事情开始于一天晚上，黛博拉说：

"Now, dearie, I think you had better make up your mind to give Laura just the kind of wedding she likes."

“现在，亲爱的，我想你最好下定决心，给劳拉举办她喜欢的婚礼。”

And Roger weakly agreed to this, but as time wore on he discovered that the kind of wedding Laura liked was a thing that made his blood run cold.

罗杰也有气无力地答应了，但随着时间的推移，他发现劳拉喜欢的那种婚礼是让他心寒的。

There seemed to be no end whatever to the young bride's blithe demands.

年轻新娘的快乐要求似乎永无止境。

The trousseau part of it he didn't mind.

嫁妆的部分他并不介意。

To the gowns and hats and gloves and shoes and trunks and jaunty travelling bags which came pouring into the house, he made no objection.

对于涌入屋内的长袍、帽子、手套、鞋子、箱子和漂亮的旅行袋，他没有提出异议。

All that, he considered, was fair play.

他认为这一切都是公平竞争。

But what got on Roger's nerves was this frantic fuss and change!

但让罗杰感到不安的是这种疯狂的大惊小怪和变化！

The faded hall carpet had to come up, his favorite lounge was whisked away, the piano was re-tuned while he was trying to take a nap, rugs were beaten, crates and barrels filled the halls, and one whole bedroom stripped and bare was transformed into a shop where the wedding presents were displayed.

褪色的大厅地毯必须重新铺开，他最喜欢的休息室被迅速拿走，在他想小睡时钢琴被重新调音，地毯被敲打，板条箱和桶装满了大厅，一间被剥光的卧室变成了展示结婚礼物的商店。

In the shuffle his box of cigars disappeared.

在混乱中，他的雪茄盒消失了。

In short, there was the devil to pay!

简而言之，魔鬼付出了代价！

And Deborah, was as bad as the bride.

而黛博拉，和新娘一样坏。

At times it appeared to Roger as though her fingers fairly itched to jab and tug at his poor old house, which wore an air of mute reproach.

有时候，罗杰觉得她的手指似乎很痒，想要戳、拉他那可怜的老房子，那房子里洋溢着一种无声的责备。

She revealed a part of her nature that he viewed with dark amazement.

她暴露了她本性的一部分，他对此感到惊讶不已。

Every hour she could spare from school, she was changing something or other at home--with an eager glitter in her eyes.

她利用课余时间在家里做一些改变，眼里闪烁着渴望的光芒。

Doing it all for Laura, she said.

她说，这一切都是为了劳拉。

Fiddlesticks and rubbish!

胡言乱语和垃圾！

She did it because she liked it!

她这么做是因为她喜欢！

In gloomy wrath one afternoon he went up to see Edith and quiet down.

一天下午，他怀着阴沉的愤怒去见伊迪丝，然后安静下来。

She was well on the way to recovery, but instead of receiving solace here he only found fresh troubles.

她正在康复的路上，但他并没有在这里得到安慰，而是发现了新的麻烦。

For sitting up in her old-fashioned bed, with an old-fashioned cap of lace upon her shapely little head, Edith made her father feel she had washed her hands of the whole affair.

伊迪丝坐在她老式的床上，漂亮的小头上戴着一顶老式的蕾丝帽子，让她的父亲觉得她已经摆脱了这一切。

"I'm sorry," she said in an injured tone, "that Laura doesn't care enough about her oldest sister to put off the wedding two or three weeks so I could be there.

“我很抱歉，”她用受伤的语气说道，“劳拉不够关心她的大姐姐，以至于把婚礼推迟了两三个星期，这样我就可以去那里了。

It seems rather undignified, I think, for a girl to hurry her wedding so.

我认为，一个女孩如此匆忙地举行婚礼，似乎很不体面。

I should have loved to make it the dear simple kind of wedding which mother would have wanted.

我本应该喜欢把它办成母亲想要的那种可爱简单的婚礼。

But so long as she doesn't care for that--and in fact has only found ten minutes--once--to run in and see the baby--"

但只要她不在乎——事实上她只抽出十分钟——一次——跑进去看看孩子——”

In dismay her father found himself defending the very daughter of whom he had come to complain.

沮丧的是，她的父亲发现自己正在为他前来投诉的女儿辩护。

It was not such a short engagement, he said, he had learned they had been engaged some time before they told him.

他说，订婚时间不短，在他们告诉他之前，他就知道他们已经订婚了一段时间。

"Do you approve of that?" she rejoined.

“你同意吗？”她重新加入。

"When I was engaged, I made Bruce go to you before I even let him--" here Edith broke off primly.

“当我订婚的时候，我在让布鲁斯——之前就让他去找你了——”说到这里，伊迪丝一本正经地打断了。

"Of course that was some time ago.

“当然那是很久以前的事了。

An engagement, Laura tells me, is 'a mere experiment' nowadays.

劳拉告诉我，如今订婚“只是一个实验”。

They 'experiment' till they feel quite sure--then notify their parents and get married in a week."

他们‘实验’直到觉得十分确定——然后通知父母并在一周内结婚。”

"She is rushing it, I admit," Roger soothingly replied.

“我承认，她太着急了，”罗杰安慰地回答道。

"But she has her mind set on Paris in June."

“但她已经决定六月去巴黎。”

"Paris in June," said Edith, "sums up in three words Laura's whole conception of marriage.

“六月的巴黎，”伊迪丝说，“用三个词概括了劳拉的整个婚姻观。

You really ought to talk to her, father.

你真的应该和她谈谈，父亲。

It's your duty, it seems to me."

在我看来，这是你的职责。”

"What do you mean?"

“你是什么意思？”

"I'd rather not tell you." Edith's glance went sternly to the cradle by her bed.

“我宁愿不告诉你。”伊迪丝的目光严厉地扫向床边的摇篮。

"Laura pities me," she said, "for having had five children."

“劳拉可怜我，”她说，“因为我有五个孩子。”

"Oh, now, my dear girl!"

“哦，现在，我亲爱的女孩！”

"She does, though--she said as much.

“不过她确实这么做了——她也是这么说的。

When she dropped in the other day and I tried to be sympathetic and give her a little sound advice, she said I had had the wedding I liked and the kind of married life I liked, and she was going to have hers.

有一天，当她顺便来访时，我试图表示同情并给她一些合理的建议，她说我已经举办了我喜欢的婚礼和我喜欢的婚姻生活，她也会有她的。

And she made it quite plain that her kind is to include no children.

她也明确表示，她的种族不能生育孩子。

It's to be simply an effort to find by 'experiment' whether or not she loves Hal Sloane.

这只是通过“实验”来确定她是否爱哈尔·斯隆的努力。

If she doesn't--" Edith gave a slight but emphatic wave of dismissal.

如果她不——”伊迪丝轻轻地但坚决地表示不屑一顾。

"Do you mean to say Laura told you that?" her father asked with an angry frown.

“你的意思是劳拉告诉你的？”她的父亲愤怒地皱着眉头问道。

"I mean she made me feel it--as plainly as I'm telling it!

“我的意思是她让我感觉到了——就像我说的一样清楚！

What I can't understand," his daughter went on, "is Deborah's attitude in the affair."

我无法理解的是，”他的女儿继续说道，“黛博拉在这件事上的态度。”

"What's the matter with Deborah?" inquired Roger dismally.

“黛博拉怎么了？”罗杰沮丧地问道。

"Oh, nothing's the matter with Deborah.

“哦，黛博拉没什么事。

She's quite self-sufficient.

她已经很自给自足了。

She at least can play with modern ideas and keep her head while she's doing it.

她至少可以运用现代想法并在做事时保持头脑清醒。

But when poor Laura--a mere child with the mind of a chicken--catches vaguely at such ideas, applies them to her own little self and risks her whole future happiness, it seems to me perfectly criminal for Deborah not to interfere!

但是，当可怜的劳拉——一个头脑迟钝的小孩子——模糊地领会了这些想法，并将其应用到自己小小的自我中并冒着未来整个幸福的风险时，在我看来，黛博拉不干涉简直就是犯罪！

Not even a word of warning!"

连一句警告的话都没有！”

"Deborah believes," said her father, "in everyone's leading his own life."

“黛博拉相信，”她的父亲说，“每个人都过着自己的生活。”

"That's rot," was Edith's curt reply.

“这太糟糕了，”伊迪丝简短地回答道。

"Do I lead my own life?

“我的生活是我自己的吗？

Does Bruce?

布鲁斯有吗？

Do you?"

你是吗？”

"No," growled Roger feelingly.

“不，”罗杰深情地咆哮道。

"Do my children?" Edith demanded.

“我的孩子们也这样吗？”伊迪丝问道。

"I know Deborah would like them to.

“我知道黛博拉希望他们这么做。

That's her latest and most modern fad, to run a school where every child shall sit with a rat in its lap or a goat, and do just what he pleases--follow his natural bent, she says.

这是她最新、最现代的时尚，经营一所学校，每个孩子都坐在腿上，腿上放着一只老鼠或一只山羊，做他喜欢做的事——遵循他的自然倾向，她说。

I hope she won't come up to the mountains and practice on my children.

我希望她不要到山上来对我的孩子们练习。

I should hate to break with Deborah," Edith ended thoughtfully.

我不想和黛博拉分手。”伊迪丝若有所思地结束道。

Roger rose and walked the room.

罗杰站起身来，走进房间。

The comforting idea entered his mind that when the wedding was over he would take out his collection of rings and carefully polish every one.

他的脑海中浮现出一个令人欣慰的想法：婚礼结束后，他会拿出自己收藏的戒指，仔细打磨每一枚。

But even this hope did not stay with him long.

但即便是这个希望也没有在他心中停留太久。

"With Laura at home," he heard Edith continue, "you at least had a daughter to run your house.

“有劳拉在家，”他听到伊迪丝继续说道，“你至少还有一个女儿来管理你的家。

If Deborah tries to move you out--"

如果黛博拉试图把你搬出去——”

"She won't!" cried Roger in alarm.

“她不会！”罗杰惊恐地叫道。

"If she does," persisted Edith, "or if she begins any talk of the kind--you come to me and _I'll_ talk to her!"

“如果她这样做了，”伊迪丝坚持道，“或者如果她开始进行任何类似的谈话——你来找我，我会和她谈谈！”

Her father walked in silence, his head down, frowning at the floor.

她的父亲默默地走着，低着头，皱着眉头看着地板。

"It seems funny," Edith continued, "that women like me who give children their lives, and men like Bruce who are building New York--actually doing it all the time--have so little to say in these modern ideas.

“这似乎很有趣，”伊迪丝继续说道，“像我这样赋予孩子生命的女性，以及像布鲁斯这样正在建设纽约的男人——实际上一直在这样做——对这些现代观念几乎没有什么可说的。

I suppose it's because we're a little too real."

我想这是因为我们有点太真实了。”

"To come back to the wedding," Roger suggested.

“回来参加婚礼，”罗杰建议道。

"To come back to the wedding, father dear," his daughter said compassionately.

“回来参加婚礼吧，亲爱的爸爸。”女儿同情地说。

"I'm afraid it's going to be a 'mere form' which will make you rather wretched.

“恐怕这只是‘形式’，会让你变得相当可怜。

When you get so you can't endure it, come in and see me and the baby."

当你实在受不了的时候，就进来看看我和孩子。”

As he started for home, her words of warning recurred to his mind.

当他准备回家时，她的警告话又浮现在他的脑海里。

Yes, here was the thing that disturbed him most, the ghost lurking under all this confusion, the part which had to do with himself.

是的，这就是最让他不安的事情，在这一切混乱之下潜伏着的幽灵，与他自己有关的部分。

It was bad enough to know that his daughter, his own flesh and blood, was about to settle her fate at one throw.

知道他的女儿，他的亲骨肉，即将一举解决她的命运，这已经够糟糕的了。

But to be moved out of his house bag and baggage!

但要搬出他家的包和行李！

Roger strode wrathfully up the street.

罗杰愤怒地大步走上街道。

"It's your duty to talk to her," Edith had said.

“你有责任和她说话，”伊迪丝说。

And he meditated darkly on this: "Maybe I will and maybe I won't.

他沉思着：“也许我会，也许不会。

I know my duties without being told.

我知道自己的职责，无需别人告知。

How does Edith know what her mother liked?

伊迪丝怎么知道她妈妈喜欢什么？

We had our own likings, her mother and I, and our own ideas, long after she was tucked into bed.

在她上床很久之后，我们，她的母亲和我，都有了自己的喜好，也有自己的想法。

And yet she's always harping on 'what mother would have wanted.' What I should like to know--right now--is what Judith would want if she were here!"

然而她总是喋喋不休地说“母亲想要什么”。我现在想知道的是，如果朱迪思在这里的话她会想要什么！”

With a pang of utter loneliness amid these vexing problems, Roger felt it crowding in, this city of his children's lives.

在这些令人烦恼的问题中，罗杰感到一种彻底的孤独感，它正在涌入他孩子们生活的这座城市。

As he strode on down Broadway, an old hag selling papers thrust one in his face and he caught a glimpse of a headline.

当他沿着百老汇大步走时，一个卖报纸的老太婆把报纸塞到他脸上，他瞥见了一个标题。

Some bigwig woman re-divorced.

某位大牌女人又离婚了。

How about Laura's "experiment"?

劳拉的“实验”怎么样？

A mob of street urchins nearly upset him.

一群街头顽童差点让他心烦意乱。

How about Deborah?

黛博拉呢？

How about children?

孩子们呢？

How about schools, education, the country?

学校、教育、国家怎么样？

How about God?

神呢？

Was anyone thinking?

有人思考过吗？

Had anyone time?

有人有时间吗？

What a racket it made, slam-banging along.

它发出多么大的喧闹声，猛烈地撞击着。

The taxis and motor trucks thundered and brayed, dark masses of people swept endlessly by, as though their very souls depended on their dinners or their jobs, their movies, roaring farces, thrills, their harum scarum dances, clothes.

出租车和卡车雷鸣般地咆哮着，黑压压的人群无休无止地驶过，仿佛他们的灵魂依赖于他们的晚餐或工作、他们的电影、喧闹的闹剧、刺激、他们的鲁莽舞蹈和衣服。

A plump little fool of a woman, her skirt so tight she could barely walk, tripped by on high-heeled slippers.

一个胖乎乎的小傻女人，裙子紧得几乎走不了路，被高跟拖鞋绊倒。

That was it, he told himself, the whole city was high-heeled!

就是这样，他告诉自己，整个城市都是高跟鞋！

No solid footing anywhere!

到处都没有立足之地！

And, good Lord, how they chattered!

天哪，他们聊得多么开心啊！

He turned into a less noisy street.

他拐进一条不太吵闹的街道。

What would Judith want if she were here?

如果朱迪思在这里，她会想要什么？

It became disturbingly clear to him that she would undoubtedly wish him to have a talk with Laura now, find out if she'd really made up her mind not to have any children, and if so to tell her plainly that she was not only going against her God but risking her own happiness.

他变得令人不安的是，她现在无疑希望他能和劳拉谈谈，看看她是否真的下定决心不要孩子，如果是的话，就明确地告诉她，她不仅违背了上帝，而且拿自己的幸福冒险。

For though Judith had been liberal about any number of smaller things, she had been decidedly clear on this.

尽管朱迪思在很多小事上都很开明，但她在这一点上却非常清楚。

Yes, he must talk to Laura.

是的，他必须和劳拉谈谈。

"And she'll tell me," he reflected, "that Edith put me up to it!"

“她会告诉我，”他反思道，“是伊迪丝怂恿我这么做的！”

If only his oldest daughter would leave the other girls alone!

如果他的大女儿能放过其他女孩就好了！

Here she was planning a row with Deborah over whether poor young George should be allowed to play with rats!

在这里，她正计划与黛博拉争论是否应该允许可怜的年轻乔治和老鼠玩！

It was all so silly!...

一切都是那么愚蠢！...

Yes, his three children were drifting apart, each one of them going her separate way.

是的，他的三个孩子渐行渐远，各走各的路。

And he rather took comfort in the thought, for at least it would stop their wrangling.

这个想法让他感到很安慰，因为至少这会停止他们的争吵。

But again he pulled himself up with a jerk.

但他又猛地站了起来。

No, certainly Judith would not have liked this.

不，朱迪思肯定不会喜欢这个。

If she'd ever stood for anything, it was for keeping the family together.

如果说她曾代表过什么的话，那就是让家庭团结在一起。

It had been the heart and center of their last talks before she died.

这是她去世前他们最后一次谈话的核心内容。

His face relaxed as he walked on, but in his eyes was a deeper pain.

走着走着，他的脸色放松下来，但眼中却是更深的痛苦。

If only Judith could be here.

要是朱迪思能在这里就好了。

Before he reached home he had made up his mind to talk with Laura that very night.

回到家之前，他决定当晚就和劳拉谈谈。

He drew out his latchkey, opened his door, shut it firmly and strode into his house.

他拔出钥匙，打开门，关紧，大步走进屋里。

In the hall they were putting down the new carpet.

大厅里他们正在铺新地毯。

Cautiously picking his way upstairs, he inquired for Laura and was told she was dressing for dinner.

他小心翼翼地走上楼，询问劳拉的情况，并被告知她正在穿衣服准备吃晚饭。

He knocked at her door.

他敲了敲她的门。

"Yes?" came her voice.

“是的？”她的声音传来。

"It's I," he said, "your father."

“是我，”他说，“你的父亲。”

"Oh, hello, dad," came the answer gaily, in that high sweet voice of hers.

“哦，你好，爸爸，”她用高亢甜美的声音愉快地回答。

"I'm frightfully rushed.

“我太匆忙了。

It's a dinner dance to-night for the bridesmaids and the ushers." Roger felt a glow of relief.

今晚是伴娘和引座员的晚宴舞会。”罗杰感到一丝轻松。

"Come in a moment, won't you?"

“一会儿就过来一下，好吗？”

What a resplendent young creature she was, seated at her dresser.

她坐在梳妆台前，是一个多么光彩照人的年轻人啊。

Behind her the maid with needle and thread was swiftly mending a little tear in the fluffy blue tulle she was wearing.

在她身后，拿着针和线的女仆正在迅速修补她穿着的蓬松的蓝色薄纱上的一个小裂口。

The shaded light just over her head brought a shimmer of red in her sleek brown hair.

她头顶上的阴影灯光给她光滑的棕色头发带来了一丝红色的光芒。

What lips she had, what a bosom.

她有多么美丽的嘴唇，多么美丽的胸部。

She drew a deep breath and smiled at him.

她深吸了一口气，对他微笑。

"What are you doing to-morrow night?" her father asked her.

“明天晚上你要做什么？”她父亲问她。

"Oh, dad, my love, we have every evening filled and crammed right up to the wedding," she replied.

“哦，爸爸，我的爱人，我们每天晚上都忙得不可开交，直到婚礼，”她回答道。

"No--the last evening I'll be here.

“不——最后一个晚上我会在这里。

Hal's giving his ushers a dinner that night."

那天晚上哈尔正在为他的引座员准备晚餐。”

"Good.

“好。

I want to talk to you, my dear." He felt his voice solemn, a great mistake.

我想和你谈谈，亲爱的。”他觉得自己的声音很严肃，这是一个巨大的错误。

He saw the quick glance from her luminous eyes.

他从她明亮的眼睛里看到了快速的一瞥。

"All right, father--whenever you like."

“好吧，父亲——什么时候都可以。”

Much embarrassed Roger left the room.

罗杰十分尴尬地离开了房间。

The few days which remained were a crowding confusion of dressmakers, gowns and chattering friends and gifts arriving at all hours.

剩下的几天里，裁缝、礼服、喋喋不休的朋友和随时送来的礼物都挤满了人。

As a part of his resolve to do what he could for his daughter, Roger stayed home from his office that week.

作为为女儿尽其所能的决心的一部分，罗杰那周没有去办公室呆在家里。

But all he could do was to unpack boxes, take out presents and keep the cards, and say, "Yes, my dear, it's very nice.

但他所能做的就是打开盒子，取出礼物并保留卡片，然后说：“是的，亲爱的，这非常好。

Where shall I put this one?" As the array of presents grew, from time to time unconsciously he glanced at the engagement ring upon Laura's finger.

我该把这个放在哪儿呢？”随着礼物越来越多，他不时不自觉地瞟一眼劳拉手指上的订婚戒指。

And all the presents seemed like that.

所有的礼物看起来都是这样。

They would suit her apartment beautifully.

它们非常适合她的公寓。

He'd be glad when they were out of the house.

当他们走出家门时，他会很高兴。

The only gift that appealed to his fancy was a brooch, neither rich nor new, a genuine bit of old jewelry.

唯一吸引他的礼物是一枚胸针，既不贵也不新，是一件货真价实的旧珠宝。

But rather to his annoyance he learned that it had been sent to Laura by the old Galician Jew in the shop around the corner.

但令他恼火的是，他得知这是街角商店里的加利西亚老犹太人寄给劳拉的。

It recalled to his mind the curious friendship which had existed for so long between the old man and his daughter.

这让他想起了老人和女儿之间长久以来存在的奇妙友谊。

And as she turned the brooch to the light Roger thought he saw in her eyes anticipations which made him uneasy.

当她把胸针转向灯光时，罗杰认为他在她眼中看到了让他不安的期待。

Yes, she was a child of his.

是的，她是他的孩子。

"June in Paris--" other Junes--"experiments"--no children.

“六月在巴黎——”其他六月——“实验”——没有孩子。

Again he felt he must have that talk.

他再次觉得他必须进行这样的谈话。

But, good Lord, how he dreaded it.

但是，上帝啊，他多么害怕啊。

The house was almost ready now, dismantled and made new and strange.

房子现在几乎已经准备好了，被拆除并变得新奇。

It was the night before the wedding.

那是婚礼前一天晚上。

Laura was taking her supper in bed.

劳拉正在床上吃晚饭。

What was he going to say to her?

他要对她说什么？

He ate his dinner silently.

他默默地吃着晚饭。

At last he rose with grim resolution.

最后，他带着严峻的决心站了起来。

"I think I'll go up and see her," he said.

“我想我应该上去看看她，”他说。

Deborah quickly glanced at him.

黛博拉迅速看了他一眼。

"What for?" she asked.

“做什么的？”她问道。

"Oh, I just want to talk to her--"

“哦，我只是想和她谈谈——”

"Don't stay long," she admonished him.

“别久留，”她告诫他。

"I've a masseuse coming at nine o'clock to get the child in condition to rest.

“我有一位按摩师九点钟来让孩子休息。

Her nerves are rather tense, you know."

你知道，她的神经相当紧张。”

"How about mine?" he said to himself as he started upstairs.

“我的呢？”他一边对自己说，一边上楼。

"Never mind, I've got to tackle it."

“没关系，我必须解决这个问题。”

Laura saw what he meant to say the moment that he entered the room, and the tightening of her features made it all the harder for Roger to think clearly, to remember the grave, kind, fatherly things which he had intended to tell her.

他一进房间，劳拉就明白了他要说的话，她的表情紧绷，让罗杰更难清晰地思考，更难记住他本想告诉她的那些严肃、仁慈、慈父般的事情。

"I don't want to talk of the wedding, child, but of what's coming after that--between you and this man--all your life." He stopped short, with his heart in his mouth, for although he did not look at her he had a quick sensation as though he had struck her in the face.

“我不想谈论婚礼，孩子，而是谈论之后发生的事情——你和这个男人之间——你的一生。”他突然停了下来，心都提到了嗓子眼，因为虽然他没有看她，但他很快就有一种感觉，好像他打在了她的脸上。

"Isn't this rather late to speak about that?

“现在说这些是不是太晚了？

Just now?

刚才？

When I'm nervous enough as it is?"

当我足够紧张的时候？”

"I know, I know." He spoke hurriedly, humbly.

“我知道，我知道。”他语气急促，语气谦虚。

"I should have talked to you long ago, I should have known you better, child.

“我应该早就和你谈谈了，我应该更了解你，孩子。

I've been slack and selfish.

我一直以来都是懒惰和自私的。

But it's better late than never."

但迟到总比不到好。”

"But you needn't!" the girl exclaimed.

“但你不需要！”女孩惊呼道。

"You needn't tell me anything!

“你什么都不用告诉我！

I know more than you think--I know enough!" Roger looked at her, then at the wall.

我知道的比你想象的还要多——我知道得够多了！”罗杰看着她，然后看着墙壁。

She went on in a voice rather breathless: "I know what I'm doing--exactly--just what I'm getting into.

她用一种相当气喘吁吁的声音继续说道：“我知道我在做什么——确切地说——就是我正在做什么。

It's not as it was when you were young--it's different--we talk of these things.

这和你年轻时不一样了——不同了——我们谈论这些事情。

Harold and I have talked it all out." In the brief and dangerous pause which followed Roger kept looking at the wall.

哈罗德和我已经把一切都谈完了。”在接下来的短暂而危险的停顿中，罗杰一直看着墙壁。

"Have you talked--about having children?"

“你们谈过——关于生孩子的事吗？”

"Yes," came the answer sharply, and then he felt the hot clutch of her hand.

“是的，”尖锐的回答，然后他感觉到她的手被握得滚烫。

"Hadn't you better go now, dad?" He hesitated.

“爸爸，你现在最好走吗？”他犹豫了。

"No," he said.

“不，”他说。

His voice was low.

他的声音很低。

"Do you mean to have children, Laura?"

“你想要孩子吗，劳拉？”

"I don't know."

“我不知道。”

"I think you do know.

“我想你确实知道。

Do you mean to have children?" Her big black eyes, dilating, were fixed defiantly on his own.

你的意思是要孩子吗？”她那双乌黑的大眼睛睁得大大的，挑衅地盯着他。

"Well then, no, I don't!" she replied.

“那么，不，我不！”她回答道。

He made a desperate effort to think what he could say to her.

他拼命思考自己能对她说些什么。

Good God, how he was bungling!

天哪，他真是笨手笨脚的！

Where were all his arguments?

他所有的论点都在哪里？

"How about your religion?" he blurted out.

“你的宗教信仰怎么样？”他脱口而出。

"I haven't any--which makes me do that--I've a right to be happy!"

“我没有——这让我这么做——我有权利快乐！”

"You haven't!" His voice had suddenly changed.

“你没有！”他的声音突然变了。

In accent and in quality it was like a voice from the heart of New England where he had been born and bred.

无论是口音还是音质，都像是来自他出生和长大的新英格兰中心的声音。

"I mean you won't be happy--not unless you have a child!

“我的意思是你不会幸福——除非你有孩子！

It's what you need--it'll fill your life!

这就是您所需要的——它将充实您的生活！

It'll settle you--deepen you--tone you down!"

它会让你安定下来——加深你的感受——让你平静下来！”

"Suppose I don't want to be toned down!" The girl was almost hysterical.

“我想我不想被贬低吧！”女孩几乎歇斯底里。

"I'm no Puritan--I want to live!

“我不是清教徒——我想活下去！

I tell you we are different now!

我告诉你我们现在不一样了！

We're not all like Edith--and we're not like our mothers!

我们并不都像伊迪丝——我们也不像我们的母亲！

We want to live!

我们想活下去！

And we have a right to!

我们有权利这样做！

Why don't you go?

你为什么不走？

Can't you see I'm nearly crazy?

你没看到我快疯了吗？

It's my last night, my very last!

这是我的最后一晚，也是我的最后一晚！

I don't want to talk to you--I don't even know what I'm saying!

我不想跟你说话——我什至不知道我在说什么！

And you come and try to frighten me!" Her voice caught and broke into sobs.

你还来吓唬我！”她的声音哽咽，突然抽泣起来。

"You know nothing about me!

“你对我一无所知！

You never did!

你从来没有这样做过！

Leave me alone, can't you--leave me alone!"

别管我了，你能不能——别管我了！”

"Father?" He heard Deborah's voice, abrupt and stern, outside the door.

“父亲？”他听到门外传来黛博拉的声音，声音突然而严厉。

"I'm sorry," he said hoarsely.

“我很抱歉，”他沙哑地说。

He went in blind fashion out of the room and down to his study.

他盲目地走出房间，走进书房。

He lit a cigar and smoked wretchedly there.

他点燃一支雪茄，狼狈地抽着。

When presently Deborah appeared he saw that her face was set and hard; but as she caught the baffled look, the angry tortured light in his eyes, her own expression softened.

不久，黛博拉出现了，他看到她的脸色严肃而严肃。但当她看到他困惑的表情和眼中愤怒而痛苦的光芒时，她自己的表情也柔和了。

"Poor father," she said, in a pitying way.

“可怜的父亲，”她怜悯地说。

"If Edith had only let you alone."

“如果伊迪丝不打扰你就好了。”

"I certainly didn't do much good."

“我当然没有做太多好事。”

"Of course you didn't--you did harm--oh, so much more harm than you know." Into the quiet voice of his daughter crept a note of keen regret.

“你当然没有——你造成了伤害——哦，伤害比你知道的要多得多。”女儿平静的声音中夹杂着浓浓的遗憾。

"I wanted to make her last days in this house a time she could look back on, so that she'd want to come home for help if ever she's in trouble.

“我想让她在这所房子里的最后几天成为她可以回顾的日子，这样如果她遇到麻烦，她就会想回家寻求帮助。

She has so little--don't you see?--of what a woman needs these days.

她现在所需要的东西太少了——你明白吗？

She has grown up so badly.

她已经成长得这么糟糕了。

Oh, if you'd only let her alone.

哦，如果你能让她一个人呆着就好了。

It was such a bad, bad time to choose." She went to her father and kissed him.

这是一个非常非常糟糕的选择时机。”她走向她的父亲并吻了他。

"Well, it's over now," she said, "and we'll make the best we can of it.

“好吧，现在一切都结束了，”她说，“我们会尽力而为。

I'll tell her you're sorry and quiet her down.

我会告诉她你很抱歉并让她安静下来。

And to-morrow we'll try to forget it has happened."

明天我们会努力忘记这件事已经发生了。”

* * * * *

** ** ** **

For Roger the morrow went by in a whirl.

对于罗杰来说，明天过得很快。

The wedding, a large church affair, was to take place at twelve o'clock.

婚礼是一场大型教堂活动，定于十二点举行。

He arose early, put on his Prince Albert, went down and ate his breakfast alone.

他起得很早，穿上阿尔伯特亲王服，下楼独自吃早餐。

The waitress was flustered, the coffee was burnt.

女服务员很慌张，咖啡烧焦了。

He finished and anxiously wandered about.

他说完，焦急地四处走动。

The maids were bustling in and out, with Deborah giving orders pellmell.

女仆们熙熙攘攘地进进出出，黛博拉胡乱地发号施令。

The caterers came trooping in.

餐饮服务员蜂拥而至。

The bridesmaids were arriving and hurrying up to Roger's room.

伴娘们也赶到了，急忙赶到罗杰的房间。

That place was soon a chaos of voices, giggles, peals of laughter.

那个地方很快就变得一片混乱，充满了说话声、咯咯笑声和笑声。

Laura's trunks were brought downstairs, and Roger tagged them for the ship, one for the cabin and three for the hold, and saw them into the wagon.

劳拉的箱子被搬下楼，罗杰在船上贴上标签，一个放在船舱，三个放在货舱，然后把它们送进马车。

Then he strode distractedly everywhere, till at last he was hustled by Deborah into a taxi waiting outside.

然后他心不在焉地大步走去，最后被黛博拉推上一辆在外面等候的出租车。

"It's all going so smoothly," Deborah said, and a faint sardonic glimmer came into her father's hunted eyes.

“一切都很顺利，”黛博拉说，她父亲猎奇的眼睛里闪现出一丝讽刺的光芒。

Deborah was funny!

黛博拉很有趣！

Soon he found himself in the church.

很快他就发现自己来到了教堂里。

He heard whispers, eager voices, heard one usher say to another, "God, what a terrible head I've got!" And Roger glared at him for that.

他听到窃窃私语，热切的声音，听到一个引座员对另一个引座员说：“天啊，我的脑袋多糟糕啊！”罗杰因此瞪了他一眼。

Plainly these youngsters, all mere boys, had been up with the groom a good part of the night....

显然，这些年轻人，全都是男孩，已经和新郎一起睡了大半夜了……

But here was Laura, pale and tense.

但这是劳拉，脸色苍白，紧张。

She smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

她对他微笑，握住他的手。

There was silence, then the organ, and now he was taking her up the aisle.

一片寂静，然后是风琴声，现在他正带着她走上过道。

Strange faces stared.

陌生的面孔注视着。

His jaw set hard.

他的下巴僵硬了。

At last they reached the altar.

他们终于到达了祭坛。

An usher quickly touched his arm and he stepped back where he belonged.

引座员很快碰了碰他的手臂，他就退到了属于他的地方。

He listened but understood nothing.

他听了，但什么也听不懂。

Just words, words and motions.

只是言语、言语和动作。

"If any man can show just cause why they may not be lawfully joined together, let him now speak or else hereafter forever hold his peace."

“如果有人能提出正当理由，说明为什么他们不能合法地结合在一起，请他现在发言，否则以后就永远保持沉默。”

"No," thought Roger, "I won't speak."

“不，”罗杰想，“我不会说话。”

Just then he caught sight of Deborah's face, and at the look in her steady gray eyes all at once he could feel the hot tears in his own.

就在这时，他看到了黛博拉的脸，看到她那双坚定的灰色眼睛里的神情，他立刻感觉到自己眼中滚烫的泪水。

At the wedding breakfast he was gay to a boisterous degree.

在婚礼早餐会上，他表现得非常热闹。

He talked to strange women and brought them food, took punch with men he had never laid eyes on, went off on a feverish hunt for cigars, came back distractedly, joked with young girls and even started some of them dancing.

他和陌生的女人交谈，给她们带来食物，和他从未见过的男人打拳，疯狂地寻找雪茄，心不在焉地回来，和年轻女孩开玩笑，甚至让她们中的一些人跳舞。

The whole affair was over in no time.

整个事件很快就结束了。

The bride and the groom came rushing downstairs; and as they escaped from the shower of rice, Roger ran after them down the steps.

新娘和新郎冲下楼来。当他们逃离大米雨时，罗杰追着他们跑下了台阶。

He gripped Sloane's hand.

他握住斯隆的手。

"Remember, boy, it's her whole life!" entreated Roger hoarsely.

“记住，孩子，这是她的一生！”罗杰声音嘶哑地恳求道。

"Yes, sir!

“是的，先生！

I'll look out!

我会留意的！

No fear!"

不用害怕！”

"Good-bye, daddy!"

“再见，爸爸！”

"God bless you, dear!"

“上帝保佑你，亲爱的！”

They were speeding away.

他们正在加速离开。

And with the best man, who looked weary and spent, Roger went slowly back up the steps.

伴郎看上去疲惫不堪，罗杰和伴郎一起慢慢走上台阶。

It was an effort now to talk.

现在说话已经很困难了。

Thank Heaven these people soon were gone.

感谢上帝，这些人很快就消失了。

Last of all went the ponderous aunt of the groom.

最后走的是新郎笨重的阿姨。

How the taxi groaned as he helped her inside and started her off to Bridgeport.

当他把她扶进车里并载着她前往布里奇波特时，出租车发出了怎样的呻吟声。

Back in his study he found his cigars and smoked one dismally with Bruce.

回到他的书房，他找到了他的雪茄，和布鲁斯沮丧地抽了一支。

Bruce was a decent sort of chap.

布鲁斯是一个正派的小伙子。

He knew when to be silent.

他知道什么时候该保持沉默。

"Well," he spoke finally, rising, "I guess I'll have to get back to the office." He smiled a little and put his hand on Roger's weary shoulder.

“好吧，”他终于站了起来，“我想我得回办公室了。”他微微一笑，把手放在罗杰疲惫的肩膀上。

"We're glad it's over--eh?" he asked.

“我们很高兴一切都结束了——嗯？”他问道。

"Bruce," said Roger heavily, "you've got a girl of your own growing up.

“布鲁斯，”罗杰沉重地说，“你有一个自己成长的女孩。

Don't let her grow to feel you're old.

不要让她觉得你老了。

Live on with her.

和她一起生活。

She'll need you." His massive blunt face darkened.

她会需要你的。”他那张巨大而迟钝的脸变得阴沉起来。

"The world's so damnably new," he muttered, "so choked up with fool ideas." Bruce still smiled affectionately.

“这个世界真是太新了，”他嘀咕道，“充满了愚蠢的想法。”布鲁斯依然深情地微笑着。

"Go up and see Edith," he said, "and forget 'em.

“上去看看伊迪丝，”他说，“忘掉他们吧。

She never lets one into the flat.

她从不让人进入公寓。

She said you were to be sure to come and tell her about the wedding."

她说你一定要来告诉她婚礼的消息。”

"All right, I'll go," said Roger.

“好吧，我这就去。”罗杰说。

He hunted about for his hat and coat.

他四处寻找他的帽子和外套。

What a devilish mess they had made of the house.

他们把房子弄得一团糟。

A half hour later he was with Edith; but there, despite his efforts to answer all her questions, he grew heavier and heavier, till at last he barely spoke.

半小时后，他和伊迪丝在一起了。但在那里，尽管他努力回答她所有的问题，他却变得越来越重，直到最后几乎不再说话。

He sat watching Edith's baby.

他坐着看着伊迪丝的孩子。

"Did you talk to Laura?" he heard her ask.

“你和劳拉谈过了吗？”他听到她问。

"Yes," he replied.

“是的，”他回答道。

"It did no good." He knew that Edith was waiting for more, but he kept doggedly silent.

“这没有什么好处。”他知道伊迪丝在等待更多，但他顽固地保持沉默。

"Well, dear," she said presently, "at least you did what you could for her."

“好吧，亲爱的，”她很快说道，“至少你为她做了你能做的事。”

"I've never done what I could," he rejoined.

“我从来没有做过我能做的事，”他回答道。

"Not with any one of you." He glanced at her with a twinge of pain.

“不和你们任何一个人在一起。”他看着她，眼神里带着一丝痛苦。

"I don't know as it would have helped much if I had.

“我不知道，如果我知道的话会有很大帮助。

This town is running away with itself.

这个小镇正在自行逃跑。

I want a rest now, Edith, I want things quiet for a while." He felt her anxious, pitying look.

我现在想要休息一下，伊迪丝，我想要安静一会儿。”他感觉到她焦急而怜悯的眼神。

"Where's Deborah?" she asked him.

“黛博拉在哪儿？”她问他。

"Gone back to school already?"

“已经回学校了吗？”

"I don't know where she is," he replied.

“我不知道她在哪里，”他回答道。

And then he rose forlornly.

然后他凄凉地站了起来。

"I guess I'll be going back home," he said.

“我想我会回家，”他说。

On his way, as his thoughts slowly cleared, the old uneasiness rose in his mind.

一路上，思绪慢慢清醒，心中又升起了昔日的不安。

Would Deborah want to keep the house?

黛博拉想保留房子吗？

Suppose she suggested moving to some titty-tatty little flat.

假设她建议搬到某个简陋的小公寓去。

No, he would not stand in her way.

不，他不会妨碍她。

But, Lord, what an end to make of his life.

但是，主啊，他的生命将迎来怎样的结局？

His home was almost dark inside, but he noticed rather to his surprise that the rooms had already been put in order.

他的家里面几乎是漆黑一片，但他却惊讶地发现房间里已经收拾得井井有条。

He sank down on the living room sofa and lay motionless for a while.

他一屁股坐在客厅的沙发上，一动不动地躺了一会儿。

How tired he was.

他有多累啊。

From time to time he drearily sighed.

他时不时地叹口气。

Yes, Deborah would find him old and life here dull and lonely.

是的，黛博拉会发现他老了，这里的生活平淡而孤独。

Where was she to-night, he wondered.

他想知道她今晚在哪里。

Couldn't she quit her zoo school for one single afternoon?

她就不能从动物园学校退学一下午吗？

At last, when the room had grown pitch dark, he heard the maid lighting the gas in the hall.

最后，当房间变得漆黑一片时，他听到女仆在大厅里点燃煤气灯的声音。

Roger loudly cleared his throat, and at the sound the startled girl ejaculated, "Oh, my Gawd!"

罗杰大声清了清喉咙，听到这个声音，受惊的女孩喊道：“哦，我的天啊！”

"It's I," said Roger sternly.

“是我。”罗杰严肃地说。

"Did Miss Deborah say when she'd be back?"

“黛博拉小姐有没有说她什么时候回来？”

"She didn't go out, sir.

“她没有出去，先生。

She's up in her room."

她在楼上她的房间里。”

Roger went up and found her there.

罗杰上去发现了她。

All afternoon with both the maids she had been setting the house to rights, and now she ached in every limb.

整个下午，她都在和两个女仆一起把房子收拾好，现在她四肢酸痛。

She was lying on her bed, and she looked as though she had been crying.

她躺在床上，看上去像是刚刚哭过。

"Where have you been?" she inquired.

“你去哪儿了？”她询问道。

"At Edith's," her father answered.

“在伊迪丝家，”她父亲回答道。

She reached up and took his hand, and held it slowly tighter.

她抬起手，握住他的手，慢慢握得更紧。

"You aren't going to find it too lonely here, with Laura gone?" she asked him.

“劳拉走了，你不会觉得这里太孤独了吧？”她问他。

And the wistfulness in her deep sweet voice made something thrill in Roger.

她深沉甜美的声音中的渴望让罗杰感到有些激动。

"Why should I?" he retorted.

“我为什么要这么做？”他反驳道。

Deborah gave a queer little laugh.

黛博拉奇怪地笑了一声。

"Oh, I'm just silly, that's all," she said.

“哦，我只是傻了，仅此而已，”她说。

"I've been having a fit of blues.

“我最近心情郁闷。

I've been feeling so old this afternoon--a regular old woman.

今天下午我感觉自己老了——一个普通的老妇人。

I wanted you, dearie, and I was afraid that you--" she broke off.

我想要你，亲爱的，但我担心你——”她停了下来。

"Look here," said Roger sharply.

“看这里，”罗杰尖锐地说。

"Do you really want to keep this house?"

“你真的想保留这个房子吗？”

"Keep this house?

“保留这个房子？

Why, father!"

为什么，父亲！”

"You think you can stand it here alone, just the two of us?" he demanded.

“你觉得只有我们两个人，你一个人可以忍受吗？”他问道。

"I can," cried Deborah happily.

“我能，”黛博拉高兴地喊道。

Her father walked to the window.

她的父亲走到窗前。

There as he looked blindly out, his eyes were assaulted by the lights of all those titty-tatty flats.

当他盲目地向外看时，他的眼睛被所有那些破烂公寓的灯光袭击了。

And a look of vicious triumph appeared for a moment on his face.

他的脸上有一瞬间露出了邪恶的胜利神色。

"Very well," he said quietly, turning back.

“很好，”他低声说道，转身回去。

"Then we're both suited." He went to the door.

“那我们俩很合适。”他走到门口。

"I'll go and wash up for supper," he said.

“我去洗漱吃晚饭。”他说。

CHAPTER VIII

第八章

It was a relief to him to find how smoothly he and Deborah dropped back into their old relations.

当他发现自己和黛博拉如此顺利地恢复了原来的关系时，他感到很欣慰。

It was good to get home those evenings; for in this new stage of its existence, with its family of two, the house appeared to have filled itself with a deep reposeful feeling.

那些晚上回家真是太好了。因为在它存在的这个新阶段，有两个家庭，这所房子似乎充满了一种深深的宁静感。

Laura had gone out of its life.

劳拉已经退出了它的生活。

He glanced into her room one night, and it looked like a guest room now.

一天晚上，他朝她的房间看了一眼，现在看起来就像是一间客房。

The sight of it brought him a pang of regret.

看到这一幕，他心中涌起一阵悔恨。

But the big ship which was bearing her swiftly away to "Paris in June" seemed bearing off Roger's uneasiness too.

但那艘载着她迅速驶向“六月巴黎”的大船似乎也消除了罗杰的不安。

He could smile at his former fears, for Laura was safely married and wildly in love with her husband.

他可以对以前的恐惧微笑，因为劳拉已经安全地结婚了，并且深深地爱着她的丈夫。

Time, he thought, would take care of the rest.

他想，时间会解决剩下的事情。

Occasionally he missed her here--her voice, high-pitched but musical, chatting and laughing at the 'phone, her bustle of dressing to go out, glimpses of her extravagances, of her smart suits and evening gowns, of all the joyous color and dash that she had given to his home.

偶尔他会想念这里的她——她的声音高亢而富有音乐感，在电话里有说有笑，她忙着穿衣服准备出门，瞥见她的奢华，她漂亮的西装和晚礼服，她给他的家带来的所有欢乐的色彩和活力。

But these regrets soon died away.

但这些遗憾很快就消失了。

The old house shed them easily, as though glad to enter this long rest.

老房子轻易地把它们脱掉了，仿佛很高兴进入这漫长的休息。

For the story of his family, from Roger's point of view at least, was a long uneven narrative, with prolonged periods of peace and again with events piling one on the other.

因为他的家庭的故事，至少从罗杰的角度来看，是一个漫长而参差不齐的叙述，有长时间的和平时期，也有一个接一个的事件堆积起来。

And now there came one of those peaceful times, and Roger liked the quiet.

现在，平静的时光到来了，罗杰喜欢这种安静。

The old routine was re-established--his dinner, his paper, his cigar and then his book for the evening, some good old-fashioned novel or some pleasant book of travel which he and Judith had read aloud when they were planning out their lives.

旧的惯例又重新建立起来——他的晚餐，他的报纸，他的雪茄，然后是他晚上的书，一本好的老式小说或一本他和朱迪思在计划自己的生活时大声朗读过的愉快的旅行书。

They had meant to go abroad so often when the children had grown up.

他们原本打算等孩子们长大后就经常出国。

And he liked to read about it still.

他仍然喜欢阅读有关它的内容。

Life was so quiet over the sea, things were so old and mellow there.

海上的生活是那么的安静，那里的一切都是那么的古老而醇厚。

He resumed, too, his horseback rides, and on the way home he would stop in for a visit with Edith and her baby.

他也恢复了骑马，在回家的路上他会停下来看望伊迪丝和她的孩子。

The wee boy grew funnier every day, with his sudden kicks and sneezes, his waving fists and mighty yawns.

这个小男孩一天比一天变得有趣，他突然踢腿、打喷嚏、挥舞拳头和打哈欠。

And Roger felt drawn to his daughter here, for in these grateful seasons of rest that followed the birth of each of her children, Edith loved to lie very still and make new plans for her small brood.

罗杰对他的女儿很着迷，因为在每个孩子出生后的这些令人感激的休息季节里，伊迪丝喜欢静静地躺着，为她的小孩子制定新的计划。

Only once she spoke of Laura, and then it was to suggest to him that he gather together all the bills his daughter had doubtless left behind.

只有一次她谈到劳拉，然后是建议他收集他女儿无疑留下的所有账单。

"If you don't settle them," Edith said, "they'll go to her husband.

“如果你不解决他们，”伊迪丝说，“他们就会去找她丈夫。

And you wouldn't like that, would you?"

而且你不会喜欢这样的，是吗？”

Roger said he would see to it, and one evening after dinner he started in on Laura's bills.

罗杰说他会照顾好这件事，一天晚上晚饭后，他开始记劳拉的账单。

It was rather an appalling time.

那是一段相当可怕的时期。

He looked into his bank account and found that Laura's wedding would take about all his surplus.

他查看了自己的银行账户，发现劳拉的婚礼将花掉他所有的积蓄。

But this did not dismay him much, for money matters never did.

但这并没有让他太沮丧，因为钱的问题从来没有让他沮丧过。

It simply meant more work in the office.

这仅仅意味着办公室里有更多的工作。

The next day he rose early and was in his office by nine o'clock.

第二天，他起得很早，九点钟就到了办公室。

He had not been so prompt in months, and many of his employees came in late that morning.

他已经好几个月没有这么准时了，那天早上他的许多员工都迟到了。

But nobody seemed very much perturbed, for Roger was an easy employer.

但似乎没有人感到非常不安，因为罗杰是一个很容易相处的雇主。

Still, he sternly told himself, he had been letting things get altogether too slack.

不过，他严厉地告诉自己，他一直让事情变得太懈怠了。

He had been neglecting his business again.

他又忽略了自己的事情。

The work had become so cut and dried, there was nothing creative left to do.

这项工作已经变得如此枯燥，没有什么创意可做。

It had not been so in years gone by.

过去几年情况并非如此。

Those years had fairly bristled with ideas and hopes and schemes.

那几年充满了想法、希望和计划。

But even those old memories were no longer here to hearten him.

但即使是那些旧的记忆也不再能让他振奋。

They had all been swept away when Bruce had made him move out of his office in a dark creaky edifice down close under Brooklyn Bridge, and come up to this new building, this steel-ribbed caravansary for all kinds of business ventures, this place of varnished woodwork, floods of daylight, concrete floors, this building fireproof throughout.

当布鲁斯让他搬出布鲁克林大桥下一栋漆黑、嘎吱作响的大楼里的办公室，来到这座新建筑时，他们全都被卷走了。这座新建筑是一座适合各种商业投资的钢肋大篷车，这个地方有清漆木制品，阳光充足，混凝土地板，这座建筑自始至终都是防火的。

That expressed it exactly, Roger thought.

罗杰想，这确实表达了这一点。

Nothing could take fire here, not even a man's imagination, even though he did not feel old.

这里没有任何东西可以着火，甚至一个人的想象力也不能着火，尽管他并不觉得自己老了。

Now and then in the elevator, as some youngster with eager eyes pushed nervously against him, Roger would frown and wonder, "What are you so excited about?"

电梯里时不时地，看到一些目光热切的年轻人紧张地推近他，罗杰就会皱起眉头，纳闷：“你这么兴奋做什么？”

But again the business was running down, and this time he must jerk it back before it got beyond him.

但生意又开始下滑，这一次他必须在生意失控之前把它拉回来。

He set himself doggedly to the task, calling in his assistants one by one, going through the work in those outer rooms, where at tables long rows of busy young girls, with colored pencils, scissors and paste, were demolishing enormous piles of newspapers and magazines.

他顽强地开始执行这项任务，一一叫来助手，在外面的房间里检查工作。桌子旁有一长排忙碌的年轻女孩，拿着彩色铅笔、剪刀和浆糊，正在拆毁大堆的报纸和杂志。

And vaguely, little by little, he came to a realization of how while he had slumbered the life of the country had swept on.

渐渐地，他隐约意识到，在他沉睡的时候，乡村的生活已经在继续。

For as he studied the lists and the letters of his patrons, Roger felt confusedly that a new America was here.

因为当罗杰研究他的赞助人的名单和信件时，他困惑地感到一个新的美国就在这里。

Clippings, clippings, clippings.

剪报，剪报，剪报。

Business men and business firms, gigantic corporations, kept sending here for clippings, news of themselves or their rivals, keeping keen watch on each other's affairs for signs of strength or weakness.

商人和商业公司，巨大的公司，不断地向这里发送剪报、他们自己或竞争对手的新闻，密切关注彼此的事务，寻找强势或弱势的迹象。

How savage was the fight these days.

这些天的战斗是多么残酷啊。

Here was news of mines and mills and factories all over the land, clippings sent each morning by special messengers downtown to reach the brokers' offices before the market opened.

这里有关于全国各地矿山、磨坊和工厂的新闻，每天早上由市中心的特派信使在市场开盘前将剪报送到经纪人办公室。

One broker wrote, "Please quote your terms for the following.

一位经纪人写道：“请引用您的以下条款。

From nine to two o'clock each day our messenger will call at your office every hour for clippings giving information of the companies named below."

每天九点到两点，我们的信使每小时都会打电话到您的办公室，索要剪报，提供以下公司的信息。”

The long list appended carried Roger's fancy out all over the continent.

附加的长长的清单将罗杰的幻想带到了整个大陆。

And then came this injunction: "Remember that our messenger must leave your office every hour.

然后是这样的禁令：“记住，我们的信使必须每小时离开你的办公室。

In information of this kind every minute counts."

在此类信息中，每一分钟都很重要。”

Clippings, clippings, clippings.

剪报，剪报，剪报。

As Roger turned over his morning mail, in spite of himself he grew absorbed.

当罗杰翻阅早上的邮件时，他不由自主地变得全神贯注。

What a change in the world of literature.

文学世界发生了多么大的变化啊。

What a host of names of scribblers, not authors but just writers, not only men but women too, novelists and dramatists, poets and muckrakers all jumbled in together, each one of them straining for a place.

一大堆乱写乱画的名字，不是作家，只是作家，不仅有男人，也有女人，小说家和剧作家，诗人和揭秘者，全都混杂在一起，每个人都在争夺一席之地。

And the actors and the actresses, the musicians and the lecturers, each with his press agent and avid for publicity, "fame!" And here were society women, from New York and other cities, all eager for press notices of social affairs they had given or managed, charity work they had conducted, suffrage speeches they had made.

男女演员、音乐家和讲师，每个人都有自己的新闻经纪人，热衷于宣传，“成名！”这里有来自纽约和其他城市的上流社会妇女，她们都渴望获得关于她们所给予或管理的社会事务、她们所从事的慈善工作、她们所做的选举演讲的新闻通知。

Half the women in the land were fairly talking their heads off, it seemed.

看起来，这片土地上有一半的女性都在喋喋不休。

Some had been on his lists for years.

有些已经列在他的名单上很多年了。

They married and wanted to hear what was said in the papers about their weddings, they quarreled and got divorces and still sent here for clippings, they died and still their relatives wrote in for the funeral notices.

他们结婚了，想听听报纸上对他们婚礼的报道，他们吵架了，离婚了，仍然送到这里去取剪报，他们死了，他们的亲戚仍然写下丧葬通知。

And even death was commercialized.

甚至死亡也被商业化了。

A maker of monuments wanted news "of all people of large means, dead or dangerously ill, in the State of Pennsylvania." Here were demands from charity bodies, hospitals and colleges, from clergymen with an anxious eye on the Monday morning papers.

一位纪念碑制造者想要了解“宾夕法尼亚州所有有钱人的消息，无论是死亡还是病重的人”。这些要求来自慈善机构、医院和大学，还有焦急地盯着周一早报的神职人员。

And here was an anarchist millionaire!

这是一位无政府主义百万富翁！

And here was an insane asylum wanting to see itself in print!

这里有一座疯人院，想在印刷品上看到自己的身影！

With a grim smile on his heavy visage, Roger stared out of his window.

罗杰凝视着窗外，厚重的脸上挂着冷酷的微笑。

Slowly the smile faded, a wistful look came on his face.

笑容渐渐消失，脸上浮现出一丝忧伤。

"Who'll take my business when I'm gone?"

“我走了之后谁会接手我的生意？”

If his small son had only lived, with what new zest and vigor it might have been made to grow and expand.

如果他的小儿子还活着，他可能会以新的热情和活力成长和壮大。

If only his son had been here by his side....

如果他的儿子在他身边就好了……

CHAPTER IX

第九章

DEBORAH needed rest, he thought, for the bright attractive face of his daughter was looking rather pale of late, and the birthmark on her forehead showed a faint thin line of red.

他想，黛博拉需要休息，因为他女儿那张明亮迷人的脸最近显得有些苍白，额头上的胎记出现了一条淡淡的红色细线。

One night at dinner, watching her, he wondered what was on her mind.

一天晚上吃晚饭时，他看着她，想知道她在想什么。

She had come in late, and though several times she had made an effort to keep up the conversation, her cheeks were almost colorless and more than once in her deepset eyes came a flash of pain that startled him.

她来晚了，虽然好几次努力想继续说下去，但她的脸颊却几乎毫无血色，深陷的眼眸中不止一次闪过一丝让他吃惊的痛苦。

"Look here.

“看这里。

What's the matter with you?" he asked.

你怎么了？”他问道。

Deborah looked up quickly.

黛博拉迅速抬起头来。

"I'd rather not talk about it, dad--"

“我不想谈论这件事，爸爸——”

"Very well," he answered.

“很好，”他回答道。

And with a slight hesitation, "But I think I know the trouble," he said.

他略带犹豫地说：“但我想我知道问题所在。”

"And perhaps some other time--when you do feel like talking--" He stopped, for on her wide sensitive lips he saw a twitch of amusement.

“也许其他时候——当你确实想说话的时候——”他停了下来，因为他在她敏感的宽嘴唇上看到一丝有趣的抽搐。

"What do you think is the trouble?" she asked.

“你觉得问题出在哪里？”她问道。

And Roger looked at her squarely.

罗杰直视着她。

"Loneliness," he answered.

“孤独，”他回答道。

"Why?" she asked him.

“为什么？”她问他。

"Well, there's Edith's baby--and Laura getting married--"

“嗯，伊迪丝的孩子出生了——劳拉要结婚了——”

"I see--and so I'm lonely for a family of my own.

“我明白了——所以我对自己的家庭感到孤独。

But you're forgetting my school," she said.

但你忘记了我的学校，”她说。

"Yes, yes, I know," he retorted.

“是的，是的，我知道，”他反驳道。

"But that's not at all the same.

“但这根本不一样。

Interesting work, no doubt, but--well, it isn't personal."

毫无疑问，这是一项有趣的工作，但是——嗯，这不是个人的。”

"Oh, isn't it?" she answered, and she drew a quivering breath.

“噢，不是吗？”她回答道，颤抖着吸了一口气。

Rising from the table she went into the living room, and there a few moments later he found her walking up and down.

她从桌子上站起来，走进客厅，过了一会儿，他发现她在客厅里走来走去。

"I think I will tell you now," she said.

“我想我现在就告诉你，”她说。

"I'm afraid of being alone to-night, of keeping this matter to myself." He looked at her apprehensively.

“我害怕今晚独自一人，害怕把这件事留给我自己。”他担忧地看着她。

"Very well, my dear," he said.

“很好，亲爱的，”他说。

"This is the trouble," she began.

“这就是麻烦所在，”她开始说道。

"Down in my school we've a family of about three thousand children.

“在我的学校里，我们有一个大约有三千名孩子的家庭。

A few I get to know so well I try to follow them when they leave.

其中有一些我非常熟悉，当他们离开时，我会尽力跟随他们。

And one of these, an Italian boy--his name is Joe Bolini--was one of the best I ever had, and one of the most appealing.

其中之一是一个意大利男孩——他的名字叫乔·博利尼——是我遇到过的最好的男孩之一，也是最有吸引力的男孩之一。

But Joe took to drinking and got in with a gang of boys who blackmailed small shopkeepers.

但乔开始酗酒，并与一群勒索小店主的男孩交往。

He used to come to me at times in occasional moods of repentance.

他有时会带着悔改的心情来找我。

He was a splendid physical type and he'd been a leader in our athletics, so I took him back into the school to manage our teams in basket-ball.

他的身体素质非常好，而且是我们体育运动的领军人物，所以我带他回到学校来管理我们的篮球队。

He left the gang and stopped drinking, and we had long talks together about his great ambition.

他离开了帮派，戒了酒，我们一起长谈了他的远大抱负。

He wanted to enter the Fire Department as soon as he was twenty-one.

他想在二十一岁时就进入消防局。

And I promised to use my influence." She stopped, still frowning slightly.

我也承诺会利用我的影响力。”她停了下来，仍然微微皱着眉头。

"What happened?" Roger asked her.

“发生了什么？”罗杰问她。

"His girl took up with another man, and Joe has hot Italian blood.

“他的女儿和另一个男人在一起了，而乔则有着炽热的意大利血统。

He got drunk one night and--shot them both." There was another silence.

一天晚上他喝醉了，然后枪杀了他们两个。”又是一阵沉默。

"I did what I could," she said harshly, "but he had a bad record behind him, and the young assistant district attorney had his own record to think of, too.

“我已经尽力了，”她严厉地说，“但他的记录很糟糕，而年轻的助理地方检察官也有他自己的记录要考虑。

So Joe got a death sentence.

所以乔被判了死刑。

We appealed the case but it did no good.

我们对此案提出了上诉，但没有任何效果。

He was sent up the river and is in the death house now--and he sent for me to come to-day.

他被送到河上，现在在死亡之家——他今天派人来叫我来。

His letter hinted he was scared, he wrote that his priest was no good to him.

他的信暗示他很害怕，他写道他的牧师对他不好。

So I went up this afternoon.

于是我今天下午就上去了。

Joe goes to the chair to-morrow at six."

乔明天六点就坐到椅子上。”

Deborah went to the sofa and sat down inertly.

黛博拉走到沙发边，一动不动地坐下。

Roger remained motionless, and a dull chill crept over him.

罗杰一动不动，一股沉闷的寒意袭上心头。

"So you see my work is personal," he heard her mutter presently.

“所以你看，我的工作是私人的，”他立刻听到她嘀咕道。

All at once she seemed so far away, such a stranger to him in this life of hers.

突然间，她这一生对他来说是如此遥远、如此陌生。

"By George, it's horrible!" he said.

“乔治，太可怕了！”他说。

"I'm sorry you went to see the boy!"

“对不起，你去看那个男孩了！”

"I'm glad," was his daughter's quick retort.

“我很高兴，”他女儿很快反驳道。

"I've been getting much too sure of myself--of my school, I mean, and what it can do.

“我对自己——我的意思是我的学校，以及它能做什么——变得太有信心了。

I needed this to bring me back to the kind of world we live in!"

我需要这个来带我回到我们生活的世界！”

"What do you mean?" he roughly asked.

“你是什么意思？”他粗声粗气地问道。

"I mean there are schools and prisons!

“我的意思是有学校和监狱！

And gallows and electric chairs!

还有绞刑架和电椅！

And I'm for schools!

我是为了学校！

They've tried their jails and gallows for whole black hideous centuries!

他们已经在监狱和绞刑架上度过了整个黑暗、可怕的世纪！

What good have they done?

他们做了什么好事？

If they'd given Joe back to the school and me, I'd have had him a fireman in a year!

如果他们把乔送回学校和我，我一年内就会让他成为一名消防员！

I know, because I studied him hard!

我知道，因为我认真研究过他！

He'd have _grown_ fighting fires, he would have _saved_ lives!"

他会长大去救火，他会拯救生命！”

Again she stopped, with a catch of her breath.

她再次停了下来，屏住了呼吸。

In suspense he watched her angry struggle to regain control of herself.

他悬疑地看着她愤怒地挣扎着试图重新控制自己。

She sat bolt upright, rigid; her birthmark showed a fiery red.

她坐得笔直，僵硬。她的胎记呈火红色。

In a few moments he saw her relax.

过了一会儿，他看到她放松了。

"But of course," she added wearily, "it's much more complex than that.

“但是，当然，”她疲倦地补充道，“事情比这复杂得多。

A school is nothing nowadays--just by itself alone, I mean--it's only a part of a city's life--which for most tenement children is either very dull and hard, or cheap and false and overexciting.

如今，学校已经算不了什么了——我的意思是，它本身就不算什么了——它只是城市生活的一部分——对于大多数公寓里的孩子来说，城市生活要么非常枯燥、辛苦，要么廉价、虚假、令人兴奋。

And behind all that lie the reasons for that.

而这一切的背后隐藏着原因。

And there are so many reasons." She stared straight past her father as though at something far away.

而且原因有很多。”她的目光直直地越过父亲，仿佛注视着远处的某个东西。

Then she seemed to recall herself: "But I'm talking too much of my family."

然后她似乎回忆起自己：“但我谈论太多我的家人了。”

Roger carefully lit a cigar:

罗杰小心翼翼地点燃了一支雪茄：

"I don't think you are, my dear.

“我不认为你是，亲爱的。

I'd like to hear more about it." She smiled:

我想听听更多相关情况。”她笑道：

"To keep my mind off Joe, you mean."

“你的意思是为了让我不去想乔。”

"And mine, too," he answered.

“还有我的，”他回答道。

They had a long talk that evening about her hope of making her school what Roger visaged confusedly as a kind of mammoth home, the center of a neighborhood, of one prodigious family.

那天晚上，他们进行了一次长谈，谈到她希望将她的学校打造成罗杰困惑地认为的一个巨大的家，一个社区的中心，一个伟大家庭的中心。

At times when the clock on the mantle struck the hour loud and clear, there would fall a sudden silence, as both thought of what was to happen at dawn.

有时，当地幔上的时钟响亮而清晰地报时时，周围会突然陷入一片寂静，因为两人都在思考黎明时分会发生什么。

But quickly Roger would question again and Deborah would talk steadily on.

但很快罗杰就会再次提问，而黛博拉就会继续滔滔不绝。

It was after midnight when she stopped.

她停下来的时候已经是午夜过后了。

"You've been good to me to-night, dearie," she said.

“亲爱的，你今晚对我很好，”她说。

"Let's go to bed now, shall we?"

“我们现在去睡觉吧？”

"Very well," he answered.

“很好，”他回答道。

He looked at his daughter anxiously.

他焦急地看着女儿。

She no longer seemed to him mature.

在他看来，她不再成熟了。

He could feel what heavy discouragements, what problems she was facing in the dark mysterious tenement world which she had chosen to make her own.

他能感觉到，在她自己选择的黑暗神秘的公寓世界里，她面临着多么沉重的沮丧和问题。

And compared to these she seemed a mere girl, a child groping its way, just making a start.

与这些人相比，她似乎只是一个女孩，一个摸索出路、刚刚开始的孩子。

And so he added wistfully, "I wish I could be of more help to you." She looked up at him for a moment.

于是他若有所思地补充道：“我希望能为你提供更多帮助。”她抬头看了他一会儿。

"Do you know why you are such a help?" she said.

“你知道你为什么这么帮忙吗？”她说。

"It's because you have never grown old--because you've never allowed yourself to grow absolutely certain about anything in life." A smile half sad and half perplexed came on her father's heavy face.

“这是因为你从未变老——因为你从未让自己对生活中的任何事情变得绝对确定。”父亲厚重的脸上露出半悲伤半困惑的笑容。

"You consider that a strong point?" he asked.

“你认为这是一个优点吗？”他问道。

"I do," she replied, "compared to being a bundle of creeds and prejudices."

“我愿意，”她回答道，“与一堆信条和偏见相比。”

"Oh, I've got prejudices enough."

“哦，我的偏见已经够多了。”

"Yes," she said.

“是的，”她说。

"And so have I.

“我也一样。

But we're not even sure of _them_, these days."

但现在我们甚至不确定它们。”

"The world has a habit of crowding in," her father muttered vaguely.

“这个世界有拥挤的习惯。”她父亲含糊地嘀咕道。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

Roger did not sleep that night.

罗杰那天晚上没有睡觉。

He could not keep his thoughts away from what was going to happen at dawn.

他无法将自己的思绪从黎明时将要发生的事情上移开。

Yes, the city was crowding in upon this quiet house of his.

是的，这座城市正在涌入他这座安静的房子。

Dimly he could recollect, in the genial years of long ago, just glancing casually now and then at some small and unobtrusive notice in his evening paper: "Execution at Sing Sing." It had been so remote to him.

他依稀记得，在很久以前的温馨岁月里，他只是时不时地瞥一眼晚报上的一些不引人注目的小告示：“在新新处决。”这对他来说是那么遥远。

But here it was smashing into his house, through the life his own daughter was leading day and night among the poor!

但在这里，它却砸进了他的房子，而他自己的女儿却日日夜夜地生活在穷人之中！

Each time he thought of that lad in a cell, again a chill crept over him!

每次想到牢房里的那个小伙子，他的心里又会升起一股寒意！

But savagely he shook it off, and by a strong effort of his will he turned his thoughts to the things she had told him about her school.

但他野蛮地甩掉了它，并通过他的意志的强大努力，他将思绪转向了她告诉他的有关学校的事情。

Yes, in her main idea she was right.

是的，她的主要想法是对的。

He had no use for wild reforms, but here was something solid, a good education for every child.

他没有必要进行疯狂的改革，但这里有一些坚实的东西，即为每个孩子提供良好的教育。

More than once, while she had talked, something very deep in Roger had leaped up in swift response.

不止一次，当她说话的时候，罗杰内心深处的某种东西迅速地跳出来做出反应。

For Deborah, too, was a part of himself.

对于黛博拉来说，也是他自己的一部分。

He, too, had had his feeling for humanity in the large.

他也对人性有着广泛的感情。

For years he had run a boys' club at a little mission school in which his wife had been interested, and on Christmas Eve he had formed the habit of gathering up a dozen small urchins right off the street and taking them 'round and fitting them out with good warm winter clothing, after which he had gone home to help Judith trim the Christmas tree and fill their children's stockings.

多年来，他在一所小教会学校经营着一个男孩俱乐部，他的妻子对这所学校很感兴趣，圣诞节前夕，他养成了在街上聚集十几个小顽童的习惯，带他们四处走动，给他们穿上温暖的冬衣，然后他回家帮助朱迪思修剪圣诞树，给孩子们装满袜子。

And later, when she had gone to bed, invariably he had taken "The Christmas Carol" from its shelf and had settled down with a glow of almost luxurious brotherhood.

后来，当她上床睡觉时，他总是从书架上取出《圣诞颂歌》，带着近乎奢华的兄弟情谊安顿下来。

There was sentiment in Roger Gale, and as he read of "Tiny Tim" his deepset eyes would glisten with tears.

罗杰·盖尔身上充满了感情，当他读到《小蒂姆》时，他深陷的眼睛里闪烁着泪光。

And now here was Deborah fulfilling a part of him in herself.

现在黛博拉在这里实现了他的一部分。

"You will live on in our children's lives." But this was going much too far!

“你将继续活在我们孩子的生活中。”但这太过分了！

She was letting herself be swallowed up completely by this work of hers!

她正在让自己彻底被自己的这件作品所吞噬！

It was all very well for the past ten years, but she was getting on in age!

这十年一切都很好，但她却老了！

High time to marry and settle down!

是时候结婚并安定下来了！

Again angrily he shook off the thought of that boy Joe alone in a cell, eyes fixed in animal terror upon the steel door which would open so soon.

他再次愤怒地摆脱了那个男孩乔独自一人在牢房里的想法，他的眼睛充满动物般的恐惧，盯着那扇很快就会打开的钢门。

The day was slowly breaking.

天慢慢地亮了。

It was the early part of June.

那是六月初。

How fresh and lovely it must be up there in the big mountains with Edith's happy little lads.

和伊迪丝快乐的小伙子们一起在大山里，一定是多么新鲜和可爱啊。

Here it was raw and garish, weird.

这里是原始的、花哨的、奇怪的。

Some sparrows began quarreling just outside his window.

一些麻雀在他的窗外开始吵架。

Roger rose and walked the room.

罗杰站起身来，走进房间。

Restlessly he went into the hall.

他心神不宁地走进了大厅。

The old house appeared so strange in this light--as though stripped bare--there was something gone.

这座老房子在这种光线下显得如此奇怪——仿佛被剥光了——有什么东西消失了。

Softly he came to Deborah's door.

他轻轻地来到黛博拉的门口。

It was open wide, for the night had been warm, and she lay awake upon her bed with her gaze fixed on the ceiling.

由于夜晚很温暖，门敞开着，她躺在床上，眼睛盯着天花板，没睡着。

She turned her head and saw him there.

她转过头，看到他在那里。

He came in and sat down by her window.

他进来，在她的窗边坐下。

For a long time neither made a sound.

很长一段时间都没有发出声音。

Then the great clock on the distant tower, which had been silent through the night, resumed its deep and measured boom.

远处塔楼上的大钟一整夜都保持沉默，然后又恢复了低沉而有节奏的轰鸣声。

It struck six times.

敲击了六次。

There was silence again.

又是一片寂静。

More and more taut grew his muscles, and suddenly it felt to him as though Deborah's fierce agony were pounding into his very soul.

他的肌肉越来越紧绷，突然他感觉黛博拉的剧烈痛苦正在冲击他的灵魂。

The slow, slow minutes throbbed away.

缓慢而缓慢的时间一晃而过。

At last he rose and left her.

最后他站起来离开了她。

There was a cold sweat on his brow.

他的额头冒出了冷汗。

"I'll go down and make her some coffee," he thought.

“我下去给她泡杯咖啡，”他想。

Down in the kitchen it was a relief to bang about hunting for the utensils.

在厨房里忙着寻找餐具真是一种解脱。

On picnics up in the mountains his coffee had been famous.

在山上野餐时，他的咖啡很有名。

He made some now and boiled some eggs, and they breakfasted in Deborah's room.

他现在做了一些，煮了一些鸡蛋，他们在黛博拉的房间里吃早餐。

She seemed almost herself again.

她几乎又恢复了原来的样子。

Later, while he was dressing, he saw her in the doorway.

后来，当他穿衣服的时候，他在门口看到了她。

She was looking at her father with bright and grateful, affectionate eyes.

她用明亮、感激、深情的目光看着父亲。

"Will you come to school with me to-day?

“今天你能和我一起去学校吗？

I'd like you to see it," Deborah said.

我想让你看看，”黛博拉说。

"Very well," he answered gruffly.

“很好，”他粗声粗气地回答。

CHAPTER X

第十章

Out of the subway they emerged into a noisy tenement street.

出了地铁，他们来到了一条喧闹的公寓街。

Roger had known such streets as this, but only in the night-time, as picturesque and adventurous ways in an underground world he had explored in search of strange old glittering rings.

罗杰熟悉这样的街道，但只在夜间，这是他在地下世界中探索的风景如画、充满冒险的方式，寻找奇怪的古老闪闪发光的戒指。

It was different now.

现在不同了。

Gone were the Rembrandt shadows, the leaping flare of torches, the dark surging masses of weird uncouth humanity.

伦勃朗的影子、火炬跳跃的光芒、怪异粗野的人性的黑暗涌动都消失了。

Here in garish daylight were poverty and ugliness, here were heaps of refuse and heavy smells and clamor.

这里在光鲜亮丽的日子里，贫穷而丑陋，这里有成堆的垃圾、浓重的气味和喧闹。

It disgusted and repelled him, and he was tempted to turn back.

这让他感到厌恶和排斥，他很想回头。

But glancing at Deborah by his side he thought of the night she had been through.

但他看了一眼身边的黛博拉，想起了她所经历的那个夜晚。

No, he decided, he would go on and see what she was up to here.

不，他决定，他要继续看看她在这里做什么。

They turned into a narrower street between tall dirty tenements, and in a twinkling all was changed.

他们拐进一条狭窄的街道，街道两旁都是又高又脏的公寓，转眼间一切都变了。

For the street, as far as he could see, was gay with flaunting colors, torrents of bobbing hats and ribbons, frocks and blouses, shirts and breeches, vivid reds and yellows and blues.

就他所见，街道上色彩缤纷，帽子和丝带、连衣裙和衬衫、衬衫和马裤、鲜艳的红色、黄色和蓝色随处可见。

It was deafening with joyous cries, a shrill incessant chatter, chatter, piercing yells and shrieks of laughter.

欢呼声震耳欲聋，尖叫声不断，喋喋不休，刺耳的叫喊声和尖叫的笑声。

Children, swarms of children, children of all sizes passed him, clean and dirty, smiling, scowling, hurrying, running, pummeling, grabbing, whirling each other 'round and 'round--till the very air seemed quivering with wild spirits and new life!

孩子们，成群的孩子，各种大小的孩子从他身边经过，干净的和肮脏的，微笑的，皱眉的，匆忙的，奔跑的，殴打的，抓握的，互相旋转的——直到空气似乎都因狂野的精神和新的生命而颤抖！

He heard Deborah laughing.

他听到黛博拉笑了。

Five hilarious small boys had hold of her hands and were marching in triumph waving their caps.

五个欢闹的小男孩握着她的手，挥舞着帽子，凯旋而行。

"Heigh there--heigh there!

“嗨，嗨，嗨！

Heigh--heigh--heigh!"

嗨——嗨——嗨！”

The school was close in front of them.

学校就在他们面前。

An enormous building of brick and tile wedged into a disordered mass of tenements, shops and factories, it had been built around a court shut out from the street by a high steel fence.

这是一座巨大的砖瓦建筑，挤在杂乱无章的公寓、商店和工厂之中，它围绕着一个庭院而建，被高高的钢栅栏与街道隔开。

They squeezed into the gateway, through which a shouting punching mob of urchins were now pushing in; and soon from a balcony above Roger looked down into the court, where out of a wild chaos order was appearing.

他们挤进了大门，一群顽童正从门口冲进来，大喊大叫，拳打脚踢。很快，罗杰就从头顶的阳台上往下看去，球场一片混乱，秩序井然。

Boys to the right and girls to the left were forming in long sinuous lines, and three thousand faces were turned toward the building.

右边的男孩和左边的女孩排成了长长的、蜿蜒的队伍，三千张脸都转向了大楼。

In front appeared the Stars and Stripes.

前面出现了星条旗。

Then suddenly he heard a crash from underneath the balcony, and looking down he saw a band made up of some thirty or forty boys.

突然，他听到阳台下面传来一声撞击声，低头一看，发现有一支由三十或四十个男孩组成的乐队。

Their leader, a dark Italian lad, made a flourish, a pass with his baton, and the band broke into a blaring storm, an uproarious, booming march.

他们的领军人物是一位皮肤黝黑的意大利小伙子，他挥舞着指挥棒，一挥手，乐队便爆发出一阵喧闹的风暴，一场喧闹、轰鸣的进行曲。

The mob below fell into step, and line after line in single file the children marched into their school.

下面的暴徒们齐心协力，孩子们排成一排，走进了学校。

"Look up!

“抬头看！

Look all around you!" He heard Deborah's eager voice in his ear.

看看你周围！”他听到黛博拉热切的声音在耳边响起。

And as he looked up from the court below he gave a low cry of amazement.

当他从下面的法庭上抬起头来时，他惊讶地低声叫了一声。

In hundreds of windows all around, of sweatshops, tenements, factories, on tier upon tier of fire escapes and even upon the roofs above, silent watchers had appeared.

周围的数百个窗户里，血汗工厂、廉价公寓、工厂里，在层层防火梯上，甚至在上面的屋顶上，都出现了沉默的观察者。

For this one moment in the day the whole congested neighborhood had stopped its feverish labor and become an amphitheater with all eyes upon the school.

一天中的这一刻，整个拥挤的街区停止了狂热的劳动，变成了一个圆形剧场，所有人的目光都集中在学校身上。

And the thought flashed into Roger's mind: "Deborah's big family!"

罗杰的脑海中闪过一个念头：“黛博拉的大家庭！”

He had a strange confusing time.

他度过了一段奇怪而混乱的时期。

In her office, in a daze, he sat and heard his daughter with her two assistant principals, her clerk and her stenographer, plunge into the routine work of the day.

在她的办公室里，他茫然地坐着，听着女儿和她的两位副校长、她的办事员和她的速记员投入到当天的日常工作中。

What kind of school teacher was this?

这是一个什么样的学校老师？

She seemed more like the manager of some buzzing factory.

她看起来更像是某个热闹工厂的经理。

Messages kept coming constantly from class-rooms, children came for punishment, and on each small human problem she was passing judgment quickly.

教室里不断传来消息，孩子们来接受惩罚，对人类的每一个小问题她都很快做出判断。

Meanwhile a score of mothers, most of them Italians with colored shawls upon their heads, had straggled in and taken seats, and one by one they came to her desk.

与此同时，二十位母亲，其中大多数是头戴彩色披肩的意大利人，散乱地进来坐下，一一来到她的办公桌前。

For these women who had been children in peasant huts in Italy now had children of their own in the great city of New York, and they found it very baffling.

因为这些在意大利农民小屋里度过童年的妇女现在在纽约这座大城市有了自己的孩子，她们觉得这非常令人困惑。

How to keep them in at night?

晚上如何让它们呆在家里？

How to make them go to the priest?

如何让他们去见牧师？

How to feed and clothe them?

如何让他们吃饱穿暖？

How to live in these tenement homes, in this wild din and chaos?

在这些喧闹和混乱的公寓里，如何生活？

They wanted help and they wanted advice.

他们需要帮助，需要建议。

Deborah spoke in Italian, but turning to her father she would translate from time to time.

黛博拉用意大利语说话，但她会时不时地向父亲翻译。

A tired scowling woman said, "My boy won't obey me.

一位疲惫、愁眉苦脸的女人说道：“我的孩子不听我的。

His father is dead.

他的父亲死了。

When I slap him he only jumps away.

当我打他一巴掌时，他只是跳开。

I lock him in and he steals the key, he keeps it in his pocket.

我把他锁在里面，他偷了钥匙，放在口袋里。

He steals the money that I earn.

他偷了我赚的钱。

He says I'm from the country." And a flabby anxious woman said, "My girl runs out to dance halls.

他说我是乡下人。”一位身体松弛、焦虑的女人说道：“我的女儿跑到舞厅去了。

Sometimes she comes back at two in the morning.

有时她凌晨两点回来。

She is fifteen and she ought to get married.

她十五岁了，该结婚了。

But what can I do?

但我能做什么呢？

A nice steady man who never dances comes sometimes to see her--but she makes faces and calls him a fatty, she dances before him and pushes him out and slams the door.

一个从不跳舞的好男人有时会来看她——但她会做鬼脸，骂他是个胖子，在他面前跳舞，把他推出去，然后关上门。

What can I do?"

我能做什么？”

"Please come and see our janitor and make him fix our kitchen sink!" an angry little woman cried.

“请来看看我们的清洁工，让他修理我们的厨房水槽！”一个愤怒的小女人哭了。

"When I try to wash the dishes the water spouts all over me!" And then a plump rosy mother said in a soft coaxing voice, "I have eight little children, all nice and clean.

“当我尝试洗碗时，水喷到我身上！”这时，一位脸色红润、胖乎乎的母亲用温柔的哄哄的声音说道：“我有八个孩子，都乖巧干净。

When you tell them to do anything they always do it quickly.

当你告诉他们做任何事时，他们总是很快就做。

They smile at you, they are like saints.

他们对你微笑，他们就像圣人。

So could the kind beautiful teacher fix it up with a newspaper to send them to the country--this summer when it is so hot?

那么，善良美丽的老师能不能用一份报纸安排他们送他们去乡下——今年夏天，天气这么热呢？

The newspaper could send a man and he could take our pictures."

报纸可以派一个人来给我们拍照。”

"Most of us girls used to be in this school," said a bright looking Jewess of eighteen.

“我们大多数女孩都曾经在这所学校上过学，”一位十八岁的漂亮犹太女说道。

"And you taught us how we should live nice.

“你教会了我们应该如何美好地生活。

But how can we live nice when our shop is so rotten?

但我们的店都这么破烂了，我们怎么能过得好呢？

Our boss is trying to kiss the girls, he is trying to hug them on the stairs.

我们的老板正试图亲吻女孩们，他正试图在楼梯上拥抱她们。

And what he pays us is a joke, and we must work till nine o'clock.

他付给我们的钱就是个笑话，我们必须工作到九点。

So will you help us, teacher, and give us a room for our meetings here?

那么，老师，您能帮助我们，并为我们提供一个在这里开会的房间吗？

We want to have a union."

我们希望建立一个工会。”

A truant officer brought in two ragged, frightened little chaps.

一名逃学的警官带了两个衣衫褴褛、受惊的小伙子进来。

Found on the street during school hours, they had to give an account of themselves.

上学期间在街上被发现，他们必须交代自己的情况。

Sullenly one of them gave an address far up in the Bronx, ten miles away.

其中一人闷闷不乐地给出了一个位于布朗克斯区十英里外的地址。

They had not been home for a week, he said.

他说，他们已经一周没回家了。

Was he lying?

他在撒谎吗？

What was to be done?

该怎么办？

Somewhere in the city their homes must be discovered.

必须在城市的某个地方找到他们的家。

And the talk of the truant officer made Roger feel ramifications here which wound out through the police and the courts to reformatories, distant cells.

逃学警官的谈话让罗杰感受到了这里的影响，这种影响通过警察和法院延伸到感化院和遥远的牢房。

He thought of that electric chair, and suddenly he felt oppressed by the heavy complexity of it all.

他想到了那把电椅，突然间他因这一切的沉重而复杂而感到压抑。

And this was part and parcel of his daughter's daily work in school!

这也是女儿在学校的日常工作的一部分！

Still dazed, disturbed but curious, he sat and watched and listened, while the bewildering demands of Deborah's big family kept crowding in upon her.

他仍然茫然、不安，但又很好奇，他坐在那儿观察、倾听，而黛博拉大家庭的令人困惑的要求却不断向她涌来。

He went to a few of the class-rooms and found that reading and writing, arithmetic and spelling were being taught in ways which he had never dreamed of.

他去了几间教室，发现阅读和写作、算术和拼写的教学方式是他从未梦想过的。

He found a kindergarten class, a carpenter shop and a printing shop, a sewing class and a cooking class in a large model kitchen.

他在一个大型模型厨房里找到了幼儿园班、木匠班和印刷班、缝纫班和烹饪班。

He watched the nurse in her hospital room, he went into the dental clinic where a squad of fifty urchins were having their teeth examined, and out upon a small side roof he found a score of small invalids in steamer chairs, all fast asleep.

他看着病房里的护士，走进牙科诊所，那里有五十个顽童正在检查牙齿，在一个小侧屋顶上，他发现了二十个小病人坐在蒸椅上，都睡着了。

It was a strange astounding school!

这是一所奇怪而令人震惊的学校！

He heard Deborah speak of a mothers' club and a neighborhood association; and he learned of other ventures here, the school doctor, the nurse and the visitor endlessly making experiments, delving into the neighborhood for ways to meet its problems.

他听到黛博拉谈到了母亲俱乐部和邻里协会；他还了解到这里的其他冒险活动，校医、护士和访客无休止地进行实验，深入社区寻找解决问题的方法。

And by the way Deborah talked to them he felt she had gone before, that years ago by day and night she had been over the ground alone.

从黛博拉跟他们说话的方式来看，他觉得她以前已经走了，几年前，她日日夜夜都独自一人在地上。

And she'd done all this while she lived in his house!

而这一切，都是她住在他家里的时候做的！

Scattered memories out of the past, mere fragments she had told him, here flashed back into his mind: humorous little incidents of daily battles she had waged in rotten old tenement buildings with rags and filth and garbage, with vermin, darkness and disease.

过去的零散记忆，她告诉他的一些片段，现在又闪现在他的脑海里：她每天在破烂不堪、肮脏不堪、垃圾、害虫、黑暗和疾病的破烂旧公寓里进行的日常战斗中的幽默小事件。

Mingled with these had been accounts of dances, weddings and christenings and of curious funeral rites.

其中还夹杂着关于舞蹈、婚礼、洗礼以及奇怪的葬礼的记载。

And struggling with such dim memories of Deborah in her twenties, called forth in his mind by the picture of the woman of thirty here, Roger grew still more confused.

罗杰与二十多岁的黛博拉的模糊记忆作斗争，脑海中浮现出这个三十岁女人的照片，他变得更加困惑。

What was to be the end of it?

事情的结局是什么？

She was still but a pioneer in a jungle, endlessly groping and trying new things.

她仍然只是丛林中的先锋，不断地摸索和尝试新事物。

"How many children are there in the public schools?" he asked.

“公立学校有多少孩子？”他问道。

"About eight hundred thousand," Deborah said.

“大约八十万，”黛博拉说。

"Good Lord!" he groaned, and he felt within him a glow of indignation rise against these immigrant women for breeding so inconsiderately.

“天哪！”他呻吟着，心中升起一股愤慨，反对这些移民妇女如此不体贴地生育。

With the mad city growing so fast, and the people of the tenements breeding, breeding, breeding, and packing the schools to bursting, what could any teacher be but a mere cog in a machine, ponderous, impersonal, blind, grinding out future New Yorkers?

随着这座疯狂的城市发展得如此之快，公寓里的人们不断地繁衍、繁衍、繁衍，学校挤满了人，教师除了机器上的一个齿轮之外还能有什么呢？

He reached home limp and battered from the storm of new impressions coming on top of his sleepless night.

他一瘸一拐地回到家，在这个不眠之夜之后，新的印象如暴风雨般袭来，让他疲惫不堪。

He had thought of a school as a simple place, filled with little children, mischievous at times perhaps and some with dirty faces, but still with minds and spirits clean, unsoiled as yet by contact with the grim spirit of the town.

他原以为学校是一个简单的地方，里面挤满了小孩子，有时可能会调皮，有些人的脸很脏，但思想和精神仍然干净，尚未因与城镇的冷酷精神接触而受到污染。

He had thought of childhood as something intimate and pure, inside his home, his family.

他认为童年是在他的家、他的家人中亲密而纯粹的事情。

Instead of that, in Deborah's school he had been disturbed and thrilled by the presence all around him of something wild, barbaric, dark, compounded of the city streets, of surging crowds, of rushing feet, of turmoil, filth, disease and death, of poverty and vice and crime.

相反，在黛博拉的学校里，他感到不安和兴奋，因为他周围存在着某种狂野、野蛮、黑暗的东西，这些东西由城市街道、汹涌的人群、匆忙的脚步、骚乱、污秽、疾病和死亡、贫穷、罪恶和犯罪组成。

But Roger could still hear that band.

但罗杰仍然能听到乐队的声音。

And behind its blaring crash and din he had felt the vital throbbing of a tremendous joyousness, of gaiety, fresh hopes and dreams, of leaping young emotions like deep buried bubbling springs bursting up resistlessly to renew the fevered life of the town!

在刺耳的撞击声和喧闹声背后，他感受到了巨大的喜悦、欢乐、新的希望和梦想的生命力的悸动，年轻的情感跳跃着，就像深埋的冒泡的泉水一样，不可抗拒地喷涌而出，更新了小镇的狂热生活！

Deborah's big family!

黛博拉的大家庭！

Everybody's children!

大家都是孩子啊！

"You will live on in our children's lives." The vision hidden in those words now opened wide before his eyes.

“你将继续活在我们孩子的生活中。”隐藏在这句话中的景象现在在他的眼前展开。

CHAPTER XI

第十一章

She told him the next morning her night school closed for the summer that week.

第二天早上，她告诉他，她的夜校那周暑假停课。

"I think I should like to see it," her father said determinedly.

“我想我应该想看看，”她父亲坚定地说。

She gave him an affectionate smile:

她给了他一个深情的微笑：

"Oh, dearie.

“哦，亲爱的。

Haven't you had enough?"

你还没玩够吗？”

"I guess I can stand it if you can," was his gruff rejoinder, "though if I ran a school like yours I think by night I'd have schooled enough.

“如果你能的话，我想我能忍受，”他粗声粗气地反驳道，“不过，如果我经营一所像你们这样的学校，我想晚上我就已经学够了。

Do most principals run night schools too?"

大多数校长也开办夜校吗？”

"A good many of them do."

“他们中的很多人都这样做。”

"Isn't it taxing your strength?" he asked.

“这不是消耗你的体力吗？”他问道。

"Don't you have to tax your strength," his daughter replied good humoredly, "to really accomplish anything?

“你难道不需要消耗你的力量吗？”他的女儿幽默地回答道，“才能真正有所作为吗？

Don't you have to risk yourself in order to really live these days?

难道你不需要冒着风险才能真正活下去吗？

Suppose you come down to-morrow night.

假设你明天晚上过来。

We won't go to the school, for I doubt if the clubs and classes would interest you very much.

我们不会去学校，因为我怀疑你是否会对俱乐部和课程感兴趣。

I'll take you through the neighborhood."

我带你逛逛小区。”

* * * * *

** ** ** **

They went down the following evening.

第二天晚上他们就下山了。

The night was warm and humid, and through the narrow tenement streets there poured a teeming mass of life.

夜晚温暖而潮湿，狭窄的廉价公寓街道上充满了生机。

People by the thousands passed, bareheaded, men in shirt sleeves, their faces glistening with sweat.

成千上万的人光着头走过，他们穿着衬衫，脸上闪着汗水。

Animal odors filled the air.

空气中弥漫着动物的气味。

The torches on the pushcarts threw flaring lights and shadows, the peddlers shouted hoarsely, the tradesmen in the booths and stalls joined in with cries, shrill peals of mirth.

手推车上的火把投射出耀眼的光影，商贩声嘶力竭地叫喊着，摊位上的商人也跟着叫喊，欢声笑语。

The mass swept onward, talking, talking, and its voice was a guttural roar.

群众向前推进，说话，说话，声音是喉音咆哮。

Small boys and girls with piercing yells kept darting under elbows, old women dozed on doorsteps, babies screamed on every side.

小男孩和小女孩不断地大声喊叫，老妇人在门口台阶上打瞌睡，婴儿在四面八方尖叫。

Mothers leaned out of windows, and by their faces you could see that they were screaming angrily for children to come up to bed.

母亲们探出窗外，从她们的脸上可以看出她们正在愤怒地尖叫着让孩子们上床睡觉。

But you could not hear their cries.

但你听不到他们的哭声。

Here around a hurdy gurdy gravely danced some little girls.

一些小女孩围着马蹄舞庄重地跳舞。

A tense young Jew, dark faced and thin, was shouting from a wagon that all men and women must be free and own the factories and mills.

一个紧张的年轻犹太人，脸色黝黑，瘦弱，在马车上大声喊道，所有男人和女人都必须获得自由，并拥有工厂和磨坊。

A mob of small boys, clustered 'round a "camp fire" they had made on the street, were leaping wildly through the flames.

一群小男孩聚集在他们在街上生的“篝火”周围，在火焰中疯狂地跳跃。

It was a mammoth cauldron here, seething, bubbling over with a million foreign lives.

这里就像一个巨大的大锅，沸腾着，沸腾着一百万个外国生命。

Deborah's big family.

黛博拉的大家庭。

She turned into a doorway, went down a long dark passage and came into a court-yard enclosed by greasy tenement walls that reared to a spot of dark blue sky where a few quiet stars were twinkling down.

她拐进一个门口，沿着一条长长的黑暗通道，来到一个院子里，院子里有油腻的公寓墙，院子里高高地耸立在深蓝色的天空上，几颗安静的星星在闪烁。

With a feeling of repugnance Roger followed his daughter into a tall rear building and up a rickety flight of stairs.

罗杰带着一种厌恶的感觉跟着他的女儿走进一栋高大的后楼，爬上一段摇摇晃晃的楼梯。

On the fourth landing she knocked at a door, and presently it was opened by a stout young Irish woman with flushed haggard features and disheveled hair.

在第四层楼梯平台上，她敲了敲门，不一会儿，开门的是一位身材矮胖、面色憔悴、头发蓬乱的爱尔兰年轻女子。

"Oh.

“哦。

Good evening, Mrs. Berry."

晚上好，贝瑞夫人。”

"Good evening.

“晚上好。

Come in," was the curt reply.

进来吧。”这是简短的回答。

They entered a small stifling room where were a stove, two kitchen chairs and three frowzled beds in corners.

他们走进一间令人窒息的小房间，里面有一个炉子、两把厨房椅子和角落里三张皱巴巴的床。

On one of the beds lay a baby asleep, on another two small restless boys sat up and watched the visitors.

其中一张床上躺着一个正在熟睡的婴儿，另外一张床上有两个焦躁不安的小男孩坐起来看着来访者。

A sick man lay upon the third.

第三个身上躺着一个病人。

And a cripple boy, a boarder here, stood on his crutches watching them.

一个瘸子男孩，这里的寄宿生，拄着拐杖站着看着他们。

Roger was struck at once by his face.

罗杰立刻被他的脸震惊了。

Over the broad cheek bones the sallow skin was tightly drawn, but there was a determined set to the jaws that matched the boy's shrewd grayish eyes, and his face lit up in a wonderful smile.

宽阔的颧骨上，蜡黄的皮肤紧绷，但下巴却坚毅，与男孩精明的灰色眼睛相配，脸上绽放出灿烂的笑容。

"Hello, Miss Deborah," he said.

“你好，黛博拉小姐，”他说。

His voice had a cheery quality.

他的声音充满欢快的气息。

"Hello, Johnny.

“你好，约翰尼。

How are you?"

你怎么样？”

"Fine, thank you."

“好的，谢谢你。”

"That's good.

“那就好。

I've brought my father with me."

我把我父亲也带来了。”

"Howdado, sir, glad to meet you."

“您好，先生，很高兴认识您。”

"It's some time since you've been to see me, John," Deborah continued.

“约翰，你已经有一段时间没有来看我了，”黛博拉继续说道。

"I know it is," he answered.

“我知道是这样，”他回答道。

And then with a quick jerk of his head, "He's been pretty bad," he said.

然后他迅速摇头，“他表现得很糟糕，”他说。

Roger looked at the man on the bed.

罗杰看着床上的男人。

With his thin waxen features drawn, the man was gasping for each breath.

男人的五官瘦削如蜡，每一次呼吸都在喘息。

"What's the matter?" Roger whispered.

“怎么了？”罗杰低声说道。

"Lungs," said the young woman harshly.

“肺。”年轻女子严厉地说。

"You needn't bother to speak so low.

“你不必费力说得这么低声。

He can't hear you anyhow.

无论如何他都听不到你说话。

He's dying.

他快死了。

He's been dying weeks."

他已经快死了好几个星期了。”

"Why didn't you let me know of this?" Deborah asked gently.

“你为什么不让我知道这件事？”黛博拉温和地问道。

"Because I knew what you'd want to do--take him off to a hospital!

“因为我知道你想要做什么——带他去医院！

And I ain't going to have it!

我不会拥有它！

I promised him he could die at home!"

我答应过他，他可以死在家里！”

"I'm sorry," Deborah answered.

“我很抱歉，”黛博拉回答。

There was a moment's silence, and the baby whimpered in its sleep.

一阵沉默，婴儿在睡梦中呜咽着。

One child had gone to his father's bed and was frowning at his agony as though it were a tiresome sight.

一个孩子走到父亲的床边，因他的痛苦而皱着眉头，仿佛这是一种令人厌烦的景象。

"Are any of them coughing?" Deborah inquired.

“他们中有人咳嗽吗？”黛博拉问道。

"No," said the woman sharply.

“不，”女人尖锐地说。

"Yes, they are, two of 'em," John cheerfully corrected her.

“是的，他们是，两个，”约翰高兴地纠正她。

"You shut up!" she said to him, and she turned back to Deborah.

“你闭嘴！”她对他说道，然后又转向黛博拉。

"It's my home, I guess, and my family, too.

“我想，这是我的家，也是我的家人。

So what do you think that _you_ can do?" Deborah looked at her steadily.

那么你认为你能做什么？”黛博拉定定地看着她。

"Yes, it's your family," she agreed.

“是的，这是你的家人，”她同意道。

"And it's none of my business, I know--except that John is one of my boys--and if things are to go on like this I can't let him board here any more.

“我知道，这不关我的事——除了约翰是我的儿子之一——如果事情再这样发展下去，我不能再让他登机了。

If he had let me know before I'd have taken him from you sooner.

如果他早点告诉我，我就会早点把他从你身边带走。

You'll miss the four dollars a week he pays."

你会怀念他每周支付的四美元。”

The woman swallowed fiercely.

女人狠狠咽了口口水。

The flush on her face had deepened.

她脸上的红晕更深了。

She scowled to keep back the tears.

她皱着眉头忍住泪水。

"We can all die for all I care!

“为了我所关心的一切，我们都可以死！

I've about got to the end of my rope!"

我快要穷尽了！”

"I see you have." Deborah's voice was low.

“我看你有。”黛博拉的声音很低。

"You've made a hard plucky fight, Mrs. Berry.

“你进行了一场艰苦而勇敢的战斗，贝里夫人。

Are there any empty rooms left in this building?"

这栋楼还有空房间吗？”

"Yes, two upstairs.

“是的，楼上有两个。

What do you want to know for?"

你想知道什么？”

"I'm going to rent them for you.

“我要把它们租给你。

I'll arrange it to-night with the janitor, on condition that you promise to move your children to-morrow upstairs and keep them there until this is over.

今晚我会和看门人一起安排，条件是你答应明天把你的孩子搬到楼上，让他们留在那里直到事情结束。

Will you?"

你会吗？”

"Yes."

“是的。”

"That's sensible.

“这是明智的。

And I'll have one of the visiting nurses here within an hour."

一小时内我会派一位上门护士过来。”

"Thanks."

“谢谢。”

"And later on we'll have a talk."

“稍后我们会谈谈。”

"All right--"

“好吧——”

"Good-night, Mrs. Berry."

“晚安，贝瑞夫人。”

"Good-night, Miss Gale, I'm much obliged....

“晚安，盖尔小姐，非常感谢……

Say, wait a minute!

说，等一下！

Will you?" The wife had followed them out on the landing and she was clutching Deborah's arm.

你会吗？”妻子跟着他们来到了楼梯平台，她紧紧抓住黛博拉的手臂。

"Why can't the nurse give him something," she whispered, "to put him to sleep for good and all?

“护士为什么不能给他一些东西，”她低声说，“让他永远睡着呢？

It ain't right to let a man suffer like that!

让一个男人受这样的苦是不对的！

I can't stand it!

我受不了了！

I'm--I'm--" she broke off with a sob.

我——我——”她抽泣着停了下来。

Deborah put one arm around her and held her steadily for a moment.

黛博拉用一只手臂搂住她，稳稳地抱了她一会儿。

"The nurse will see that he sleeps," she said.

“护士会看到他睡着了，”她说。

"Now, John," she added, presently, when the woman had gone into the room, "I want you to get your things together.

“现在，约翰，”当那个女人走进房间后，她补充道，“我要你把东西收拾好。

I'll have the janitor move them upstairs.

我会让看门人把它们搬到楼上。

You sleep there to-night, and to-morrow morning come to see me at the school."

今晚你就睡在那里，明天早上来学校见我。”

"All right, Miss Deborah, much obliged.

“好吧，黛博拉小姐，非常感谢。

I'll be all right.

我会没事的。

Good-night, sir--"

晚安，先生——”

"Good-night, my boy," said Roger, and suddenly he cleared his throat.

“晚安，我的孩子，”罗杰说，突然清了清嗓子。

He followed his daughter down the stairs.

他跟着女儿下了楼梯。

A few minutes she talked with the janitor, then joined her father in the court.

她和看门人聊了几分钟，然后和她父亲一起来到法庭。

"I'm sorry I took you up there," she said.

“我很抱歉带你去那里，”她说。

"I didn't know the man was sick."

“我不知道这个人病了。”

"Who are they?" he asked.

“他们是谁？”他问道。

"Poor people," she said.

“可怜的人，”她说。

And Roger flinched.

罗杰退缩了。

"Who is this boy?"

“这个男孩是谁？”

"A neighbor of theirs.

“他们的一个邻居。

His mother, who was a widow, died about two years ago.

他的母亲是一位寡妇，大约两年前去世。

He was left alone and scared to death lest he should be 'put away' in some big institution.

他独自一人，害怕得要死，生怕自己会被“关进”某个大机构。

He got Mrs. Berry to take him in, and to earn his board he began selling papers instead of coming to our school.

他让贝里夫人收留了他，为了赚取食宿，他开始卖报纸，而不是来我们学校。

So our school visitor looked him up.

于是我们学校的访客就去找了他。

Since then I have been paying his board from a fund I have from friends uptown, and so he has finished his schooling.

从那时起，我一直用住宅区朋友提供的基金来支付他的伙食费，所以他完成了学业。

He's to graduate next week.

他下周就要毕业了。

He means to be a stenographer."

他的目标是成为一名速记员。”

"How old is he?"

“他几岁了？”

"Seventeen," she replied.

“十七岁，”她回答道。

"How was he crippled?

“他是怎么瘸的？

Born that way?"

生来就是这样吗？”

"No. When he was a baby his mother dropped him one Saturday night when she was drunk.

“不。当他还是个婴儿的时候，一个周六的晚上，他的母亲喝醉了酒，把他扔下了。

He has never been able to sit down.

他一直没能坐下来。

He can lie down or he can stand.

他可以躺下，也可以站着。

He's always in pain, it never stops.

他总是很痛苦，从未停止过。

I learned that from the doctor I took him to see.

我从我带他去看的医生那里得知。

But whenever you ask him how he feels you get the same answer always: 'Fine, thank you.' He's a fighter, is John."

但每当你问他感觉如何时，你总是得到同样的答案：“好吧，谢谢。”他是一名战士，约翰。”

"He looks it.

“他看起来是这样。

I'd like to help that boy--"

我想帮助那个男孩——”

"All right--you can help him," Deborah said.

“好吧——你可以帮助他，”黛博拉说。

"You'll find him quite a tonic."

“你会发现他是一种补品。”

"A what?"

“什么？”

"A tonic," she repeated.

“补品，”她重复道。

And with a sudden tightening of her wide and sensitive mouth, Deborah added slowly, "Because, though I've known many hungry boys, Johnny Geer is the hungriest of them all--hungry to get on in life, to grow and learn and get good things, get friends, love, happiness, everything!" As she spoke of this child in her family, over her strong quiet face there swept a fierce, intent expression which struck Roger rather cold.

黛博拉突然收紧她宽大而敏感的嘴巴，慢慢地补充道，“因为，虽然我认识很多饥饿的男孩，但约翰尼·吉尔是他们中最饥饿的一个——渴望在生活中进步，渴望成长、学习、获得美好的事物、得到朋友、爱、幸福，一切！”当她谈到家里的这个孩子时，她坚强而安静的脸上掠过一种凶猛而专心的表情，这让罗杰感到很冷。

What a fight she was making, this daughter of his, against what overwhelming odds.

他的女儿，她正在与压倒性的优势进行怎样的斗争。

But all he said to her was this:

但他只对她说了这样一句话：

"Now let's look at something more cheerful, my dear."

“现在让我们看看更快乐的事情吧，亲爱的。”

"Very well," she answered with a smile.

“很好，”她微笑着回答。

"We'll go and see Isadore Freedom."

“我们要去看看伊萨多自由。”

"Who's he?"

“他是谁？”

"Isadore Freedom," said Deborah, "is the beginning of something tremendous.

“伊萨多的自由，”黛博拉说，“是伟大事业的开始。

He came from Russian Poland--and the first American word he learned over there was 'freedom.' So in New York he changed his name to that--very solemnly, by due process of law.

他来自俄属波兰——他在那里学到的第一个美国词是“自由”。因此，在纽约，他通过正当法律程序非常郑重地将自己的名字改成了这个名字。

It cost him seven dollars.

他花了七美元。

He had nine dollars at the time.

当时他有九美元。

Isadore is a flame, a kind of a torch in the wilderness."

伊萨多尔是一团火焰，一种荒野中的火炬。”

"How does the flame earn his living?"

“火焰是怎样谋生的？”

"At first in a sweatshop," she replied.

“一开始是在血汗工厂，”她回答道。

"But he came to my school five nights a week, and at ten o'clock when school was out he went to a little basement café, where he sat at a corner table, drank one glass of Russian tea and studied till they closed at one.

“但他每周有五个晚上来我的学校，十点放学时，他会去地下室的一家小咖啡馆，坐在角落的桌子旁，喝一杯俄罗斯茶，学习直到下午一点关门。

Then he went to his room, he told me, and used to read himself to sleep.

他告诉我，然后他就回到自己的房间，常常读书入睡。

He slept as a rule four hours.

他通常睡四个小时。

He said he felt he needed it.

他说他觉得他需要它。

Now he's a librarian earning fifteen dollars a week, and having all the money he needs he has put the thought of it out of his life and is living for education--education in freedom.

现在他是一名图书管理员，每周挣十五美元，有了他需要的所有钱，他已经把这件事从他的生活中抛诸脑后，为教育而活——自由的教育。

For Isadore has studied his name until he thinks he knows what it means."

因为伊萨多尔一直在研究他的名字，直到他认为他知道它的含义。”

They found him in a small public library on an ill-smelling ghetto street.

他们在一条臭气熏天的贫民窟街道上的一个小型公共图书馆里找到了他。

The place had been packed with people, but the clock had just struck ten and the readers were leaving reluctantly, many with books under their arms.

这里已经挤满了人，但时钟刚刚敲过十点，读者们依依不舍地离开，许多人腋下夹着书。

At sight of Deborah and her father, Isadore leaped up from his desk and came quickly to meet them with outstretched hands.

看到黛博拉和她的父亲，伊萨多尔从办公桌上跳起来，迅速伸出双手迎接他们。

"Oh, this is splendid!

“哦，这太棒了！

Good evening!" he cried.

晚上好！”他哭了。

Hardly more than a boy, perhaps twenty-one, he was short of frame but large of limb.

他几乎不比一个男孩大多少，大约二十一岁，身材矮小，但四肢粗壮。

He had wide stooping shoulders and reddish hollows in his dark cheeks.

他肩膀宽阔，弯腰驼背，黝黑的脸颊上有微红的凹陷。

Yet there was a springiness in his step, vigor and warmth in the grip of his hand, in the very curl of his thick black hair, in his voice, in his enormous smile.

然而，他的脚步充满了弹性，他握着的手充满了活力和温暖，浓密黑发的卷曲充满了活力，他的声音充满了活力，笑容也充满了温暖。

"Come," he said to Roger, when the greetings were over.

“来吧，”问候结束后他对罗杰说道。

"You shall see my library, sir.

“您将会参观我的图书馆，先生。

But I want that you shall not see it alone.

但我希望你不要独自看到它。

While you look you must close for me your eyes and see other libraries, many, many, all over the world.

当你看的时候，你必须闭上眼睛，看看世界各地的其他图书馆，很多很多。

You must see them in big cities and in very little towns to-night.

今晚你一定会在大城市和小城镇看到他们。

You must see people, millions there, hungry, hungry people.

你必须看到那里的人们，数百万人，饥饿的人们。

Now I shall show you their food and their drink." As he spoke he was leading them proudly around.

现在我要给你展示他们的食物和饮料。”当他说话时，他自豪地带领着他们。

In the stacks along the walls he pointed out fiction, poetry, history, books of all the sciences.

在墙上的书架上，他指出了小说、诗歌、历史和所有科学书籍。

"They read all, all!" cried Isadore.

“他们读了全部，全部！”伊萨多叫道。

"Look at this Darwin on my desk.

“看看我桌上的这个达尔文。

In a year so many have read this book it is a case for the board of health.

一年内有这么多人阅读了这本书，这是卫生委员会的一个案例。

And look at this shelf of economics.

看看这个经济学架子。

I place it next to astronomy.

我把它放在天文学旁边。

And I say to these people, 'Yes, read about jobs and your hours and wages.

我对这些人说，‘是的，阅读有关工作、工作时间和工资的信息。

Yes, you must strike, you must have better lives.

是的，你必须罢工，你必须过上更好的生活。

But you must read also about the stars--and about the big spaces--silent--not one single little sound for many, many million years.

但你也必须读到关于星星的故事——以及关于广阔空间的故事——寂静无声——在许多、许多百万年里没有一丝声音。

To be free you must grow as big as that--inside of your head, inside of your soul.

为了获得自由，你必须变得像那样大——在你的头脑里，在你的灵魂里。

It is not enough to be free of a czar, a kaiser or a sweatshop boss.

摆脱沙皇、皇帝或血汗工厂老板是不够的。

What will you do when they are gone?

当他们走了之后你会做什么？

My fine people, how will you run the world?

我的好人们，你们将如何统治世界？

You are deaf and blind, you must be free to open your own ears and eyes, to look into the books and see what is there--great thoughts and feelings, great ideas!

你又聋又瞎，你必须自由地张开自己的耳朵和眼睛，看看书本，看看里面有什么——伟大的思想和感情，伟大的想法！

And when you have seen, then you must think--you must think it all out every time!

当你看到之后，你必须思考——你必须每次都想清楚！

That is freedom!'" He stopped abruptly.

这就是自由！’”他突然停了下来。

Again on his dark features came a huge and winning smile, and with an apologetic shrug, "But I talk too much of my books," he said.

他黝黑的脸上再次浮现出灿烂而迷人的微笑，并抱歉地耸耸肩，“但我对我的书说得太多了，”他说。

"Come.

“来吧。

Shall we go to my café?"

我们去我的咖啡馆吧？”

On a neighboring street, a few minutes later, down a flight of steep wooden stairs they descended into a little café, shaped like a tunnel, the ceiling low, the bare walls soiled by rubbing elbows, dirty hands, the air blue and hot with smoke.

几分钟后，在附近的一条街道上，他们走下一段陡峭的木楼梯，走进一家小咖啡馆，形状像一条隧道，天花板很低，光秃秃的墙壁因肘部摩擦而弄脏了，手脏兮兮的，空气蓝色，烟雾缭绕。

Young men and girls packed in at small tables bent over tall glasses of Russian tea, and gesturing with their cigarettes declaimed and argued excitedly.

年轻的男女挤在小桌子旁，弯腰喝着高脚杯的俄罗斯茶，用香烟比划着，兴奋地朗诵和争论。

Quick joyous cries of greeting met Isadore from every side.

伊萨多尔的欢呼声从四面八方传来。

"You see?" he said gaily.

“你看？”他高兴地说。

"This is my club.

“这是我的俱乐部。

Here we are like a family." He ordered tea of a waiter who seemed more like a bosom friend.

在这里我们就像一家人一样。”他给一位看起来更像是知音的服务员点了茶。

And leaning eagerly forward, he began to speak in glowing terms of the men and girls from sweatshops who spent their nights in these feasts of the soul, talking, listening, grappling, "for the power to think with minds as clear as the sun when it rises," he ardently cried.

他热切地向前倾身，开始用热情洋溢的语言讲述来自血汗工厂的男人和女孩们，他们在这些灵魂的盛宴中度过了夜晚，交谈、倾听、搏斗，“为了获得像太阳升起时一样清晰的头脑思考的力量，”他热切地喊道。

"There is not a night in this city, not one, when hundreds do not talk like this until the breaking of the day!

“在这座城市里，没有一个夜晚，没有一个夜晚，数百人在天亮之前不会这样说话！

And then they sleep!

然后他们就睡觉了！

A little joke!

一个小玩笑！

For at six o'clock they must rise to their work!

因为六点钟他们就必须起来工作了！

And that is a force," he added, "not only for those people but a force for you and me.

这是一股力量，”他补充道，“不仅对那些人来说，而且对你我来说也是一股力量。

Do you see?

你看到了吗？

When you feel tired, when all your hopes are sinking low, you think of those people and you say, 'I will go to their places.' And you go.

当你感到疲倦时，当你所有的希望都变得渺茫时，你会想起那些人，然后说：“我会去他们的地方。”然后你就走吧。

You listen and you watch their faces, and such fire makes you burn!

你倾听并观察他们的脸，这样的火焰会让你燃烧！

You go home, you are happy, you have a new life!

你回家了，你快乐，你有新的生活！

"And perhaps at last you will have a religion," he continued, in fervent tones.

“也许你最终会拥有一种宗教，”他用热情的语气继续说道。

"You see, with us Jews--and with Christians, too--the old religion, it is gone.

“你看，对于我们犹太人——以及基督徒来说——古老的宗教已经消失了。

And in its place there is nothing strong.

而在它的位置上，没有任何强大的东西。

And so the young people go all to pieces.

于是年轻人就崩溃了。

They dance and they drink.

他们跳舞、喝酒。

If you go to those dance halls you say, 'They are crazy!' For dancing alone is not enough.

如果你去那些舞厅，你会说：“他们太疯狂了！”仅仅跳舞是不够的。

And you say, 'These people must have a religion.' You ask, 'Where can I find a new God?' And you reply, 'There is no God.' And then you must be very sad.

你说，‘这些人一定有宗教信仰。’你问：“我在哪里可以找到新的上帝？”你回答说：“没有上帝。”然后你一定会非常难过。

You know how it is?

你知道是怎么回事吗？

You feel too free.

你感觉太自由了。

And you feel scared and lonely.

你会感到害怕和孤独。

You look up at the stars.

你抬头看星星。

There are millions.

有数以百万计。

You are only a speck of dust--on one.

你只是其中的一粒尘埃。

"But then you come to my library.

“但是后来你来到了我的图书馆。

And you see those hungry people--more hungry than men have ever been.

你会看到那些饥饿的人们——比人类以往任何时候都更加饥饿。

And you see those books upon the shelves.

你会看到书架上的那些书。

And you know when they come together at last, when that power to think as clear as the sun comes into the souls of those people so hungry, then we shall have a new god for the world.

你知道，当他们最终走到一起，当那种像太阳一样清晰思考的力量进入那些如此饥饿的人们的灵魂时，那么我们将为世界带来一个新的上帝。

For there is no end to what they shall do," Isadore ended huskily.

因为他们的所作所为永无止境。”伊萨多尔沙哑地结束了讲话。

Roger felt a lump in his throat.

罗杰感到喉咙哽住了。

He glanced into his daughter's eyes and saw a suspicious brightness there.

他看了一眼女儿的眼睛，发现里面闪烁着可疑的光芒。

Isadore looked at her happily.

伊萨多高兴地看着她。

"You see?" he said to Roger.

“你看？”他对罗杰说。

"When she came here to-night she was tired, half sick.

“当她今晚来到这里时，她很累，半生病了。

But now she is all filled with life!"

但现在她充满了生机！”

* * * * *

** ** ** **

Later, on the street outside when Isadore had left them, Deborah turned to her father:

后来，当伊萨多尔离开他们后，在外面的街上，黛博拉转向她的父亲：

"Before we go home, there's one place more."

“在我们回家之前，还有一个地方。”

And they went to a building not far away, a new structure twelve floors high which rose out of the neighboring tenements.

他们来到了不远处的一栋大楼，一座十二层高的新建筑，从邻近的公寓拔地而起。

It had been built, she told him, by a socialist daily paper.

她告诉他，它是由一家社会主义日报建造的。

A dull night watchman half asleep took them in the elevator up to the top floor of the building, where in a bustling, clanking loft the paper was just going to press.

一个昏昏欲睡的守夜人半睡半醒地带着他们乘电梯到了大楼的顶层，在一个熙熙攘攘、叮当作响的阁楼里，报纸正要压下去。

Deborah seemed to know one of the foremen.

黛博拉似乎认识其中一位工头。

He smiled and nodded and led the way through the noise and bustle to a large glass door at one end.

他微笑着点点头，穿过喧嚣，来到一端的一扇大玻璃门前。

This she opened and stepped out upon a fire escape so broad it was more like a balcony.

她打开门，走出防火梯，宽阔得更像是一个阳台。

And with the noise of the presses subdued, from their high perch they looked silently down.

随着压力机的噪音减弱，他们从高处静静地往下看。

All around them for miles, it seemed, stretched dark uneven fields of roofs, with the narrow East River winding its way through the midst of them to the harbor below, silvery, dim and cool and serene, opening to the distant sea.

他们周围绵延数英里，似乎都是一片漆黑参差不齐的屋顶田野，狭窄的东河蜿蜒穿过他们中间，流向下面的港口，银色的、昏暗的、凉爽的、宁静的，通向遥远的大海。

From the bridges rearing high over the river, lights by thousands sparkled down.

河上高高耸立的桥梁上，成千上万的灯光闪闪发光。

But directly below the spot where they stood was only a dull hazy glow, rising out of dark tenement streets where dimly they could just make out numberless moving shadowy forms, restless crowds too hot to sleep.

但就在他们站立的地方正下方，只有一团暗淡的朦胧光芒，从黑暗的公寓街道中升起，依稀可见无数移动的影子，以及焦躁不安的人群，热得无法入睡。

The roofs were covered everywhere with men and women and children--families, families, families, all merged together in the dark.

屋顶上到处都是男人、女人和孩子——一家人、一家人、一家人，全都在黑暗中融为一体。

And from them rose into the night a ceaseless murmur of voices, laughing and joking, quarreling, loving and hating, demanding, complaining, and fighting and slaving and scheming for bread and the means of stark existence.

夜色中，他们不断地发出低语声，有欢笑、有玩笑、有争吵、有爱、有恨、有要求、有抱怨、有战斗、有奴役、有谋划，以换取面包和生存手段。

But among these struggling multitudes confusedly did Roger feel the brighter presence here and there of more aspiring figures, small groups in glaring, stilling rooms down there beneath the murky dark, young people fiercely arguing, groping blindly for new gods.

但在这些挣扎的人群中，罗杰困惑地感觉到，到处都有更多有抱负的人物，在阴暗的黑暗下，在耀眼、安静的房间里，有一小群年轻人激烈地争论，盲目地摸索着新的神。

And all these voices, to his ears, merged into one deep thrilling hum, these lights into one quivering glow, that went up toward the silent stars.

所有这些声音，在他耳中，都汇成了一种深沉而令人颤栗的嗡嗡声，这些光芒汇成了一道颤抖的光芒，升向寂静的星星。

And there came to him a feeling which he had often had before in many different places--that he himself was a part of all this, the great, blind, wistful soul of mankind, which had been here before he was born and would be here when he was dead--still groping, yearning, struggling upward, on and on--to something distant as the sun.

他突然有一种以前在许多不同的地方经常有过的感觉——他自己就是这一切的一部分，人类伟大、盲目、渴望的灵魂，在他出生之前就在这里，当他死后也将在这里——仍在摸索、向往、奋力向上，一直到像太阳一样遥远的东西。

And still would he be a part of it all, through the eager lives of his children.

通过他孩子们的热切生活，他仍然会成为这一切的一部分。

He turned and looked at Deborah and caught the light that was in her eyes.

他转身看着黛博拉，看到了她眼中的光芒。

CHAPTER XII

第十二章

Roger awoke the next morning feeling sore and weary, and later in his office it was hard to keep his mind on his work.

第二天早上，罗杰醒来时感到浑身酸痛、疲惫不堪，后来在办公室里，他很难专心工作。

He thought of young Isadore Freedom.

他想到了年轻的伊萨多·自由。

He was glad he had met that boy, and so he felt toward Deborah's whole terrific family.

他很高兴认识了那个男孩，因此他对黛博拉整个伟大的家庭产生了感情。

Confused and deafening as it was, there was something inspiring in it all.

尽管这一切令人困惑和震耳欲聋，但其中还是有一些鼓舞人心的东西。

But God save him from many such evenings!

但愿上帝保佑他免遭许多这样的夜晚！

For half his life Roger had been a collector, not only of rings but of people, too, of curious personalities.

罗杰一生都是一名收藏家，不仅收藏戒指，还收藏性格好奇的人。

These human bits, these memories, he had picked up as he lived along and had taken them with him and made them his own, had trimmed and polished every one until its rough unpleasant edges were all nicely smoothed away and it glittered and shone like the gem that it was.

These human bits, these memories, he had picked up as he lived along and had taken them with him and made them his own, had trimmed and polished every one until its rough unpleasant edges were all nicely smoothed away and it glittered and shone like the gem that it was.

For Roger was an idealist.

因为罗杰是一个理想主义者。

And so he would have liked to do here.

所以他很想在这里做。

What a gem could be made of Isadore with a little careful polishing.

伊萨多尔经过一点点仔细的打磨，就能成为一颗多么珍贵的宝石啊。

But Deborah's way was different.

但黛博拉的方式不同。

She stayed in life, lived in it close, with its sharp edges bristling.

她留在生活中，生活在生活中，生活的锋利边缘竖立起来。

In this there was something splendid, but there was something tragic, too.

这里面有一些辉煌的东西，但也有一些悲惨的东西。

It was all very well for that young Jew to burn himself up with his talk about freedom, his feverish searching for new gods.

对于那个年轻的犹太人来说，谈论自由、热切地寻找新的神祇让自己燃烧起来，这一切都很好。

"In five years," Roger told himself, "Mr. Isadore Freedom will either tone down or go stark mad."

“五年后，”罗杰告诉自己，“伊萨多尔·自由先生要么会低调，要么会彻底发疯。”

But quite probably he would tone down, for he was only a youngster, these were Isadore's wild oats.

但很可能他会缓和下来，因为他只是个年轻人，这些都是伊萨多尔的野燕麦。

But this was no longer Deborah's youth, she had been at this job ten years.

但这已经不再是黛博拉的青春了，她已经在这份工作上干了十年了。

And she hadn't gone mad, she had kept herself sane, she had many sides her father knew.

她并没有发疯，她一直保持着理智，她有很多父亲所了解的方面。

He knew her in the mountains, or bustling about at home getting ready for Laura's wedding, or packing Edith's children off for their summer up at the farm.

He knew her in the mountains, or bustling about at home getting ready for Laura's wedding, or packing Edith's children off for their summer up at the farm.

But did that make it any easier?

但这会让事情变得更容易吗？

No. To let yourself go was easy, but to keep hold of yourself was hard.

不，放开自己很容易，但保持自己很难。

It meant wear and tear on a woman, this constant straining effort to keep her balance and see life whole.

这意味着对女人的磨损和撕裂，需要不断努力保持平衡并看到生活的整体。

"Well, it will break her down, that's all, and I don't propose to allow it," he thought.

“好吧，这会让她崩溃，仅此而已，我不打算允许这样做，”他想。

"She's got to rest this summer and go easier next fall."

“今年夏天她必须休息，明年秋天才能轻松一些。”

But how could he accomplish it?

但他怎样才能做到呢？

As he thought about her school, with its long and generous arms reaching upon every side out into the tenements, the prospect was bewildering.

当他想到她的学校时，它的手臂又长又宽，伸向公寓的四面八方，前景令人困惑。

He searched for something definite.

他寻找某种确定的东西。

What could he do to prove to his daughter his real interest in her work?

他能做些什么来向女儿证明他对她的工作真正感兴趣？

Presently he remembered Johnny Geer, the cripple boy whom he had liked, and at once he began to feel himself back again upon known ground.

不久，他想起了约翰尼·吉尔，那个他喜欢的瘸子男孩，立刻他开始感觉自己又回到了已知的地方。

Instead of millions here was one, one plucky lad who needed help.

这里不是数百万人，而是一个需要帮助的勇敢的小伙子。

All right, by George, he should have it!

好吧，乔治，他应该得到它！

And Roger told his daughter he would be glad to pay the expense of sending John away for the summer, and that in the autumn perhaps he would take the lad into his office.

And Roger told his daughter he would be glad to pay the expense of sending John away for the summer, and that in the autumn perhaps he would take the lad into his office.

"That's good of you, dearie," Deborah said.

“你真好，亲爱的，”黛博拉说。

It was her only comment, but from the look she gave him Roger felt he was getting on.

这是她唯一的评论，但从她看向罗杰的眼神来看，罗杰觉得他相处得很好。

* * * * *

** ** ** **

One evening not long afterwards, as they sat together at dinner, she rose unsteadily to her feet and said in a breathless voice,

不久之后的一天晚上，当他们坐在一起吃晚饭时，她摇摇晃晃地站起来，气喘吁吁地说：

"It's rather close in here, isn't it?

“这里离得很近，不是吗？

I think I'll go outside for a while." Roger jumped up.

我想我要出去一会儿。”罗杰跳了起来。

"Look here, my child, you're faint!" he cried.

“看这里，我的孩子，你晕了！”他哭了。

"No, no, it's nothing!

“不不不，没什么！

Just the heat!" She swayed and reeled, pitched suddenly forward.

只是热度而已！”她摇摇晃晃，踉踉跄跄，突然向前倾斜。

"Father!

“父亲！

Quick!" And Roger caught her in his arms.

快点！”罗杰把她搂在怀里。

He called to the maid, and with her help he carried Deborah up to her bed.

他叫来女仆，在她的帮助下，他把黛博拉抱到床上。

There she shuddered violently and beads of sweat broke out on her brow.

在那里，她剧烈地颤抖着，额头上渗出了汗珠。

Her breath came hard through chattering teeth.

她的呼吸变得粗重，牙齿打战。

"It's so silly!" she said fiercely.

“真是太傻了！”她恶狠狠地说。

But as moments passed the chill grew worse.

但随着时间的流逝，寒冷变得更加严重。

Her whole body seemed to be shaking, and as Roger was rubbing one of her arms she said something to him sharply, in a voice so thick he could not understand.

她的整个身体似乎都在颤抖，当罗杰揉着她的一只手臂时，她尖锐地对他说了些什么，声音那么粗，他听不懂。

"What is it?" he asked.

“那是什么？”他问道。

"I can't feel anything."

“我什么也感觉不到。”

"What do you mean?"

“你是什么意思？”

"In my arm where you're rubbing--I can't feel your hand."

“在我手臂上你摩擦的地方——我感觉不到你的手。”

"You'd better have a doctor!"

“你最好找个医生！”

"Telephone Allan--Allan Baird.

“给艾伦——艾伦·贝尔德打电话。

He knows about this," she muttered.

他知道这件事。”她低声说道。

And Roger ran down to the telephone.

罗杰跑到电话旁。

He was thoroughly frightened.

他彻底被吓坏了。

"All right, Mr. Gale," came Baird's gruff bass, steady and slow, "I think I know what the trouble is--and I wouldn't worry if I were you.

“好吧，盖尔先生，”贝尔德粗哑的低音响起，平稳而缓慢，“我想我知道问题出在哪里——如果我是你，我就不会担心。

I'll be there in about ten minutes." And it was hardly more than that when he came into Deborah's room.

大约十分钟后我就到了。”当他走进黛博拉的房间时，情况也仅仅如此。

A moment he looked down at her.

过了一会儿，他低头看着她。

"Again?" he said.

“再次？”他说。

She glanced up at him and nodded, and smiled quickly through set teeth.

她抬头看了他一眼，点点头，很快就露出了牙齿。

Baird carefully examined her and then turned to Roger: "Now I guess you'd better go out.

贝尔德仔细地检查了她，然后转向罗杰：“现在我想你最好出去一下。

You stay," he added to Sarah, the maid.

你留下来，”他对女仆莎拉补充道。

"I may need you here awhile."

“我可能需要你在这里待一段时间。”

About an hour later he came down to Roger's study.

大约一个小时后，他来到了罗杰的书房。

"She's safe enough now, I guess," he said.

“我想她现在足够安全了，”他说。

"I've telephoned for a nurse for her, and she'll have to stay in bed a few days."

“我已经给她打电话叫护士了，她得卧床几天。”

"What's the trouble?"

“有什么事吗？”

"Acute indigestion."

“急性消化不良。”

"You don't say!" exclaimed Roger brightly, with a rush of deep relief.

“你不说！”罗杰高兴地喊道，心里一阵深深的宽慰。

Baird gave him a dry quizzical smile.

贝尔德给了他一个干巴巴、古怪的微笑。

"People have died of that," he remarked, "in less than an hour.

“不到一个小时，就有人因此而死亡，”他说道。

We caught your daughter just in time.

我们及时抓住了你的女儿。

May I stay a few moments?"

我可以停留一会儿吗？”

"Glad to have you!

“很高兴有你！

Smoke a cigar!"

抽根雪茄吧！”

"Thanks--I will." As Baird reached out for the proffered cigar, Roger suddenly noticed his hand.

“谢谢——我会的。”当贝尔德伸手去拿递过来的雪茄时，罗杰突然注意到了他的手。

Long and muscular, finely shaped, it seemed to speak of strength and skill and an immense vitality.

它修长而肌肉发达，形状优美，似乎在诉说着力量、技巧和巨大的生命力。

Baird settled himself in his chair.

贝尔德在椅子上坐了下来。

"I want to talk about her," he said.

“我想谈谈她，”他说。

"This little attack is only a symptom--it comes from nerves.

“这种轻微的发作只是一种症状——它来自于神经。

She's just about ready for a smash.

她已经准备好迎接粉碎了。

She's had slighter attacks of this kind before."

她以前也曾遭受过类似的轻微攻击。”

"I never knew it," Roger said.

“我从来不知道，”罗杰说。

"No--I don't suppose you did.

“不——我想你没有这么做。

Your daughter has a habit of keeping things like this to herself.

你女儿有把这样的事情保密的习惯。

She came to me and I warned her, but she wanted to finish out her year.

她来找我，我警告她，但她想完成这一年。

Do you know anything about her school work?"

你知道她学校的作业吗？”

"Yes, I was with her there this week."

“是的，这周我和她在一起。”

"What did she show you?" Baird inquired.

“她给你看了什么？”贝尔德问道。

Roger tried to tell him.

罗杰试图告诉他。

"No, that's not what I'm after," he said.

“不，那不是我想要的，”他说。

"That's just one of her usual evenings." For a moment he smoked in silence.

“那只是她平常的夜晚之一。”有一会儿他默默地抽烟。

"I'm hunting now for something else, for some unusual nervous shock which she appears to me to have had."

“我现在正在寻找别的东西，寻找一些不寻常的神经休克，在我看来，她曾经有过这种情况。”

"She has!" And Roger told him of her visit up to Sing Sing.

“她有！”罗杰告诉他她拜访新新的事。

Baird's lean muscular right hand slowly tightened on his chair.

贝尔德瘦削、肌肉发达的右手慢慢地握紧了椅子。

"That's a tough family of hers," he remarked.

“她的家庭很艰难，”他说。

"Yes," said Roger determinedly, "and she's got to give it up."

“是的，”罗杰坚决地说，“但她必须放弃。”

"You mean she ought to.

“你的意思是她应该这么做。

But she won't."

但她不会。”

"She's got to be made to," Roger growled.

“她必须被迫，”罗杰咆哮道。

"This summer at least." Baird shook his head.

“至少今年夏天。”贝尔德摇摇头。

"You forget her fresh air work," he replied.

“你忘记了她的新鲜空气工作，”他回答道。

"She has three thousand children on her mind.

“她心里有三千个孩子。

The city will be like a furnace, of course, and the children must be sent to camps.

当然，这座城市会像一个熔炉，孩子们必须被送到营地。

If you don't see the necessity, go and talk to her, and then you will."

如果你觉得没有必要，就去和她谈谈，然后你就会了。”

"But you can forbid it, can't you?"

“但你可以禁止它，不是吗？”

"No. Can you?"

“不。你可以吗？”

"I can try," snapped Roger.

“我可以试试。”罗杰厉声说道。

"Let's try what's possible," said Baird.

“让我们尝试一下可能的事情，”贝尔德说。

"Let's try to keep her in bed three days."

“我们尽量让她在床上躺三天吧。”

"Sounds modest," Roger grunted.

“听起来很谦虚，”罗杰咕哝道。

And a glimmer of amusement came into Baird's impassive eyes.

贝尔德冷漠的眼眸中闪过一丝玩味。

"Try it," he drawled.

“试试吧，”他慢吞吞地说。

"By to-morrow night she'll ask for her stenographer.

“到明天晚上，她就会去找她的速记员。

She'll make you think she is out of the woods.

她会让你觉得她已经脱离困境了。

But she won't be, please remember that.

但她不会，请记住这一点。

A few years more," he added, "and she'll have used up her vitality.

再过几年，”他补充道，“她就会耗尽她的活力。

She'll be an old woman at thirty-five."

三十五岁她就成了老太婆了。”

"It's got to be stopped!" cried Roger.

“必须阻止它！”罗杰喊道。

"But how?" came the low sharp retort.

“但是怎么办呢？”传来低沉尖锐的反驳声。

"You've got to know her trouble first.

“你必须先了解她的麻烦。

And her trouble is deep, it's motherhood--on a scale which has never been tried before--for thousands of children, all of whom are living in a kind of hell.

她的麻烦很深，这是对成千上万孩子的母性——其规模是以前从未尝试过的，所有这些孩子都生活在地狱中。

I know your daughter pretty well.

我很了解你的女儿。

Don't make the mistake of mixing her up with the old-fashioned teacher.

不要犯把她和老式老师混为一谈的错误。

It isn't what those children learn, it's how they live that interests her, and how they are all growing up.

她感兴趣的不是这些孩子学到了什么，而是他们的生活方式以及他们的成长方式。

I say she's a mother--in spirit--but her body has never borne a child.

我说她是一位母亲——在精神上——但她的身体从未生过孩子。

And that makes it worse--because it makes her more intense.

这让事情变得更糟——因为这让她更加紧张。

It isn't natural, you see."

你看，这并不自然。”

A little later he rose to go.

过了一会儿，他起身要走。

"By the way," he said, at the door, "there's something I meant to tell her upstairs--about a poor devil she has on her mind.

“顺便说一句，”他在门口说道，“我想在楼上告诉她一件事——关于她心目中的一个可怜的魔鬼。

A chap named Berry--dying--lungs.

一个名叫贝瑞的小伙子——快死了——肺。

She asked me to go and see him."

她让我去见他。”

"Yes?"

“是的？”

"I found it was only a matter of days." The tragic pity in Baird's quiet voice was so deep as barely to be heard.

“我发现这只是几天的事情。”贝尔德平静的声音里充满了悲惨的怜悯，深得几乎听不见。

"So I shot him full of morphine.

“所以我给他注射了大量吗啡。

He won't wake up.

他不会醒来。

Please tell her that."

请告诉她这一点。”

Tall, ungainly, motionless, he loomed there in the doorway.

他身材高大，笨拙，一动不动，隐约出现在门口。

With a little shrug and a smile he turned and went slowly out of the house.

他耸耸肩，微笑着转身，慢慢走出了房子。

CHAPTER XIII

第十三章

Deborah's recovery was rapid and determined.

黛博拉的康复迅速而坚定。

The next night she was sitting up and making light of her illness.

第二天晚上，她坐起来，对自己的病轻描淡写。

On the third day she dismissed her nurse, and when her father came home from his office he found gathered about her bed not only her stenographer but both her assistant principals.

第三天，她解雇了护士，当她父亲从办公室回到家时，他发现聚集在她床边的不仅有她的速记员，还有她的两位副校长。

He frowned severely and went to his room, and a few minutes later he heard them leave.

他皱起眉头，走进了自己的房间，几分钟后，他听见他们离开的声音。

Presently she called to him, and he came to her bedside.

不久，她叫了他一声，他就来到了她的床边。

She was lying back on the pillow with rather a guilty expression.

她仰躺在枕头上，表情有些愧疚。

"Up to your old antics, eh?" he remarked.

“继续你以前的滑稽动作，嗯？”他说。

"Exactly.

“没错。

It couldn't be helped, you see.

你看，这也是没办法的事。

It's the last week of our school year, and there are so many little things that have to be attended to.

这是我们学年的最后一周，有很多小事情需要处理。

It's simply now or never."

要么现在，要么永远。”

"Humph!" was Roger's comment.

“哼！”这是罗杰的评论。

"It's now or never with you," he thought.

“现在就在你身边，否则就永远不会了，”他想。

He went down to his dinner, and when he came back he found her exhausted.

他下楼去吃晚饭，回来时发现她疲惫不堪。

In the dim soft light of her room her face looked flushed and feverish, and vaguely he felt she was in a mood where she might listen to reason.

房间里昏暗柔和的灯光下，她的脸色显得通红、发烧，隐隐约约感觉到她的心情是可以听道理的。

He felt her hot dry hand on his.

他感觉到她那又热又干的手放在他的手上。

Her eyes were closed, she was smiling.

她闭着眼睛，微笑着。

"Tell me the news from the mountains," she said.

“告诉我山上的消息，”她说。

And he gave her the gossip of the farm in a letter he had had from George.

他在乔治写的一封信中向她讲述了农场的八卦。

It told of a picnic supper, the first one of the season.

它讲述了野餐晚餐，这是这个季节的第一顿。

They had had it in the usual place, down by the dam on the river, "with a bonfire--a perfect peach--down by the big yellow rock--the one you call the Elephant." As Roger read the letter he could feel his daughter listening, vividly picturing to herself the great dark boulders by the creek, the shadowy firs, the stars above and the cool fresh tang of the mountain night.

他们在老地方，在河边的水坝旁，“在一块黄色的大石头旁，生起一堆篝火——一颗完美的桃子——你称之为大象的那块石头。”当罗杰读这封信时，他能感觉到女儿在听，生动地想象着小溪边巨大的黑色巨石、阴暗的冷杉、头顶的星星和山夜凉爽的新鲜气息。

"After this little sickness of yours--and that harum scarum wedding," he said, "I feel we're both entitled to a good long rest in mountain air."

“在你生了这个小病之后——还有那场鲁莽的婚礼，”他说，“我觉得我们俩都有权在山间的空气中好好地休息一会儿。”

"We'll have it, too," she murmured.

“我们也会拥有它，”她低声说道。

"With Edith's little youngsters.

“和伊迪丝的孩子们在一起。

They're all the medicine you need." He paused for a moment, hesitating.

它们就是你需要的所有药物。”他停顿了片刻，犹豫着。

But it was now or never.

但现在就是这样，否则永远不会。

"The only trouble with you," he said, "is that you've let yourself be caught by the same disease which has its grip upon this whole infernal town.

“你唯一的麻烦，”他说，“就是你让自己感染了同样的疾病，这种疾病已经控制了整个地狱小镇。

You're like everyone else, you're tackling about forty times what you can do.

你和其他人一样，你正在处理的事情是你能做的事情的大约四十倍。

You're actually trying not only to teach but to bring 'em all up as your own, three thousand tenement children.

事实上，你不仅在努力教导，而且还把他们当作你自己的三千个公寓孩子来抚养。

And this is where it gets you."

这就是你的目标。”

Again he halted, frowning.

他再次停了下来，皱起了眉头。

What next?

接下来怎么办？

"Go on, dear, please," said Deborah, in demure and even tones.

“说吧，亲爱的，拜托，”黛博拉用端庄而平稳的语气说道。

"This is very interesting."

“这很有趣。”

"Now then," he continued, "in this matter of your school.

“那么，”他继续说道，“关于你们学校的事情。

I wouldn't ask you to give it up, I've already seen too much of it.

我不会要求你放弃它，我已经看到太多了。

But so long as you've got it nicely started, why not give somebody else a chance?

但只要你已经很好地开始了，为什么不给别人一个机会呢？

One of those assistants of yours, for example--capable young women, both.

例如，你的一位助手——都是有能力的年轻女性。

You could stand right behind 'em with help and advice--"

你可以站在他们身后提供帮助和建议——”

"Not yet," was Deborah's soft reply.

“还没有，”黛博拉轻声回答。

She had turned her head on her pillow and was looking at him affectionately.

她把头靠在枕头上，深情地看着他。

"Why not?" he demanded.

“为什么不呢？”他问道。

"Because it's not nicely started at all.

“因为这根本就不是一个好的开始。

There's nothing brilliant about me, dear--I'm a plodder, feeling my way along.

我没有什么出色之处，亲爱的——我是一个埋头苦干、摸索前行的人。

And what I have done in the last ten years is just coming to a stage at last where I can really see a chance to make it count for something.

我在过去十年中所做的一切终于到了一个阶段，我可以真正看到一个机会让它发挥作用。

When I feel I've done that, say in five years more--"

当我觉得我已经做到了这一点时，比如说五年后——”

"Those five years," said her father, "may cost you a very heavy price." As Deborah faced his troubled regard, her own grew quickly serious.

“这五年，”她的父亲说，“可能会让你付出非常惨重的代价。”当黛博拉面对他不安的目光时，她自己的目光很快变得严肃起来。

"I'd be willing to pay the price," she replied.

“我愿意付出代价，”她回答道。

"But why?" he asked with impatience.

“但为什么？”他不耐烦地问道。

"Why pay when you don't have to?

“既然不需要，为什么要付钱呢？

Why not by taking one year off get strength for twenty years' work later on?

为什么不休息一年，为以后工作二十年积蓄力量呢？

You'd be a different woman!"

你会是一个不一样的女人！”

"Yes, I think I should be.

“是的，我想我应该这样。

I'd never be the same again.

我再也不会像以前一样了。

You don't quite understand, you see.

你不太明白，你看。

This work of mine with children--well, it's like Edith's having a baby.

我的这幅与孩子们有关的作品——嗯，就像伊迪丝生了孩子一样。

You have to do it while you're young."

你必须趁年轻做这件事。”

"That works both ways," her father growled.

“这是双向的，”她父亲咆哮道。

"What do you mean?" He hesitated:

“你是什么意思？”他犹豫了一下：

"Don't you want any children of your own?"

“你不想要自己的孩子吗？”

Again she turned her eyes toward his, then closed them and lay perfectly still.

她再次把眼睛转向他的眼睛，然后闭上眼睛，一动不动地躺着。

"Now I've done it," he thought anxiously.

“现在我已经做到了，”他焦急地想。

She reached over and took his hand.

她伸手握住他的手。

"Let's talk of our summer's vacation," she said.

“我们来谈谈我们的暑假吧，”她说。

A little while later she fell asleep.

过了一会儿，她睡着了。

Downstairs he soon grew restless and after a time he went out for a walk.

下楼后，他很快就变得焦躁起来，过了一会儿，他出去散步。

But he felt tired and oppressed, and as he had often done of late he entered a little "movie" nearby, where gradually the pictures, continually flashing out of the dark, drove the worries from his mind.

但他感到疲倦和压抑，就像他最近经常做的那样，他进入了附近的一部小“电影”，渐渐地，黑暗中不断闪现的画面，驱走了他脑海中的忧虑。

For a half an hour they held his gaze.

他们对视了他半个小时。

Then he fell into a doze.

然后他就睡着了。

He was roused by a roar of laughter, and straightening up in his seat with a jerk he looked angrily around.

他被一阵大笑声惊醒，猛地从座位上直起身来，愤怒地环顾四周。

Something broadly comic had been flashed upon the screen; and men and women and children, Italians, Jews and Irish, jammed in close about him, a dirty and perspiring mass, had burst into a terrific guffaw.

屏幕上闪过一些很滑稽的东西。男人、女人、孩子，意大利人、犹太人和爱尔兰人，都挤在他周围，脏兮兮、汗流浃背，爆发出一阵狂笑。

Now they were suddenly tense again and watching the screen in absorbed suspense, while the crude passions within themselves were played upon in the glamorous dark.

现在他们突然又紧张起来，全神贯注地看着屏幕，而他们内心的原始激情则在迷人的黑暗中发挥着。

And Roger scanned their faces--one moment smiling, all together, as though some god had pulled a string; then mawkish, sentimental, soft; then suddenly scowling, twitching, with long rows of animal eyes.

罗杰扫视着他们的脸——有一刻，他们全都微笑着，仿佛某个神拉动了一根绳子；然后，他们的脸庞都在微笑。然后是伤感、多愁善感、温柔；然后突然皱起眉头，抽搐着，长出一排长长的动物眼睛。

But eager--eager all the time!

但渴望——一直渴望！

Hungry people--yes, indeed!

饥饿的人们——是的，确实如此！

Hungry for all the good things in the town, and for as many bad things, too!

渴望镇上所有的好东西，但也渴望很多坏的东西！

On one who tried to feed this mob there was no end to their demands!

对于一个试图养活这群暴徒的人来说，他们的要求是无止境的！

What was one woman's life to them?

一个女人的生活对他们来说是什么？

Deborah's big family!

黛博拉的大家庭！

* * * * *

** ** ** **

Edith came to the house one afternoon, and she was in Deborah's room when her father returned from his office.

一天下午，伊迪丝来到家里，当她父亲从办公室回来时，她正在黛博拉的房间里。

Her convalescence over at last, she was leaving for the mountains.

她的康复期终于结束了，她要上山了。

"Do learn your lesson, Deborah dear," she urged upon her sister.

“亲爱的黛博拉，一定要吸取教训，”她敦促她的妹妹。