The List of N Things

September 2009 I bet you the current issue of Cosmopolitan has an article whose title begins with a number.

2009 年 9 月 我敢打赌，最新一期的《Cosmopolitan》有一篇标题以数字开头的文章。

"7 Things He Won't Tell You about Sex," or something like that.

“关于性，他不会告诉你的七件事”，或者类似的东西。

Some popular magazines feature articles of this type on the cover of every issue.

一些流行杂志每期的封面都会刊登此类文章。

That can't be happening by accident.

这不可能是偶然发生的。

Editors must know they attract readers.

编辑必须知道他们吸引读者。

Why do readers like the list of n things so much?

为什么读者如此喜欢n件事清单？

Mainly because it's easier to read than a regular article.

主要是因为它比普通文章更容易阅读。

[ 1 ] Structurally, the list of n things is a degenerate case of essay.

[1] 从结构上看，n 件事的列表是论文的退化案例。

An essay can go anywhere the writer wants.

一篇文章可以写到作者想去的任何地方。

In a list of n things the writer agrees to constrain himself to a collection of points of roughly equal importance, and he tells the reader explicitly what they are.

在列出的 n 件事中，作者同意将自己限制在大致同等重要的要点的集合中，并明确地告诉读者它们是什么。

Some of the work of reading an article is understanding its structure—figuring out what in high school we'd have called

阅读一篇文章的一些工作是理解它的结构——弄清楚我们在高中时所说的内容

its "outline." Not explicitly, of course, but someone who really understands an article probably has something in his brain afterward that corresponds to such an outline.

它的“轮廓”。当然不是明确的，但是真正理解一篇文章的人之后他的大脑中可能会出现与这样的大纲相对应的东西。

In a list of n things, this work is done for you.

在n件事的列表中，这项工作已经为你完成了。

Its structure is an exoskeleton.

它的结构是外骨骼。

As well as being explicit, the structure is guaranteed to be of the simplest possible type: a few main points with few to no subordinate ones, and no particular connection between them.

除了明确之外，结构还保证是尽可能简单的类型：几个要点，很少甚至没有从属要点，并且它们之间没有特定的联系。

Because the main points are unconnected, the list of n things is random access.

因为要点是互不相连的，所以n个东西的列表是随机访问的。

There's no thread of reasoning you have to follow.

没有你必须遵循的推理线索。

You could read the list in any order.

您可以按任何顺序阅读该列表。

And because the points are independent of one another, they work like watertight compartments in an unsinkable ship.

由于这些点彼此独立，因此它们的工作原理就像一艘不沉船中的防水舱。

If you get bored with, or can't understand, or don't agree with one point, you don't have to give up on the article.

如果您对某一点感到厌倦、无法理解或不同意，您不必放弃这篇文章。

You can just abandon that one and skip to the next.

您可以放弃那个并跳到下一个。

A list of n things is parallel and therefore fault tolerant.

n 个事物的列表是并行的，因此是容错的。

There are times when this format is what a writer wants.

有时这种格式正是作家想要的。

One, obviously, is when what you have to say actually is a list of n things.

显然，其中之一是当你要说的实际上是 n 件事的列表时。

I once wrote an essay about the mistakes that kill startups , and a few people made fun of me for writing something whose title began with a number.

我曾经写过一篇关于扼杀初创公司的错误的文章，一些人取笑我写了一些标题以数字开头的文章。

But in that

但在那

case I really was trying to make a complete catalog of a number of independent things.

案例中我确实试图为许多独立的事物制作一个完整的目录。

In fact, one of the questions I was trying to answer was how many there were.

事实上，我试图回答的问题之一是有多少。

There are other less legitimate reasons for using this format.

使用这种格式还有其他不太合法的原因。

For example, I use it when I get close to a deadline.

例如，当我接近截止日期时我会使用它。

If I have to give a talk and I haven't started it a few days beforehand, I'll sometimes play it safe and make the talk a list of n things.

如果我必须发表演讲，而我没有提前几天开始演讲，有时我会谨慎行事，将演讲列成包含 n 件事的清单。

The list of n things is easier for writers as well as readers.

列出 n 件事对作者和读者来说都更容易。

When you're writing a real essay, there's always a chance you'll hit a dead end.

当你写一篇真正的论文时，你总是有可能陷入死胡同。

A real essay is a train of thought, and some trains of thought just peter out.

一篇真正的文章是一个思路，而有些思路就会逐渐消失。

That's an alarming possibility when you have to give a talk in a few days.

当你几天后必须发表演讲时，这种可能性令人震惊。

What if you run out of ideas?

如果你没有想法怎么办？

The compartmentalized structure of the list of n things protects the writer from his own stupidity in much the same way it protects

n 事物列表的划分结构可以保护作者免受自己的愚蠢之害，就像它保护作者一样

the reader.

读者。

If you run out of ideas on one point, no problem: it won't kill the essay.

如果你在某一点上没有想法，没问题：它不会毁掉这篇文章。

You can take out the whole point if you need to, and the essay will still survive.

如果需要的话，你可以去掉整个观点，这篇文章仍然可以存在。

Writing a list of n things is so relaxing.

写下 n 件事的清单真是太放松了。

You think of n/2 of them in the first 5 minutes.

在前 5 分钟内你会想到其中的 n/2 个。

So bang, there's the structure, and you just have to fill it in.

砰，结构就出来了，你只需要填写它即可。

As you think of more points, you just add them to the end.

当你想到更多的点时，你只需将它们添加到最后即可。

Maybe you take out or rearrange or combine a

也许你取出或重新排列或组合

few, but at every stage you have a valid (though initially low-res) list of n things.

很少，但在每个阶段你都有一个有效的（尽管最初是低分辨率的）n 件事列表。

It's like the sort of programming where you write a version 1 very quickly and then gradually modify it, but at every point have working code—or the style of painting where you begin with a complete but very blurry sketch done in an hour, then spend a week cranking up the resolution.

这就像一种编程，你很快地编写了版本 1，然后逐渐修改它，但在每个点都有工作代码，或者是一种绘画风格，你在一小时内完成一个完整但非常模糊的草图，然后花一周的时间提高分辨率。

Because the list of n things is easier for writers too, it's not

因为列出 n 件事对于作家来说也更容易，但事实并非如此

always a damning sign when readers prefer it.

当读者喜欢它时，它总是一个可恶的迹象。

It's not necessarily evidence readers are lazy; it could also mean they don't have much confidence in the writer.

这并不一定证明读者是懒惰的；这并不一定是读者懒惰的证据。这也可能意味着他们对作者没有多大信心。

The list of n things is in that respect the cheeseburger of essay forms.

从这方面来说，n 件事的清单就像论文形式中的芝士汉堡一样。

If you're eating at a restaurant you suspect is bad, your best bet is to order the cheeseburger.

如果你在一家你怀疑很糟糕的餐厅吃饭，最好的选择就是点芝士汉堡。

Even a bad cook can make a decent cheeseburger.

即使是一个糟糕的厨师也能做出一个像样的芝士汉堡。

And there are pretty strict conventions about what a cheeseburger should

关于芝士汉堡应该做什么有相当严格的约定

look like.

看起来像。

You can assume the cook isn't going to try something weird and artistic.

你可以假设厨师不会尝试一些奇怪和艺术的东西。

The list of n things similarly limits the damage that can be done by a bad writer.

同样，这 n 件事的清单也限制了坏作家可能造成的损害。

You know it's going to be about whatever the title says, and the format prevents the writer from indulging in any flights of fancy.

你知道这将是关于标题所说的任何内容，并且格式阻止作者沉迷于任何幻想。

Because the list of n things is the easiest essay form, it should be a good one for beginning writers.

因为列出 n 件事是最简单的论文形式，所以对于初学者来说应该是一个很好的形式。

And in fact it is what most

事实上这也是最重要的

beginning writers are taught.

初学者作家受到教导。

The classic 5 paragraph essay is really a list of n things for n = 3.

经典的 5 段文章实际上是 n = 3 的 n 件事的列表。

But the students writing them don't realize they're using the same structure as the articles they read in Cosmopolitan .

但撰写这些文章的学生并没有意识到他们使用的结构与他们在 Cosmopolitan 中阅读的文章相同。

They're not allowed to include the numbers, and they're expected to spackle over the gaps with gratuitous transitions ("Furthermore...") and cap the thing at either end with introductory and concluding paragraphs so it will look superficially

他们不允许包含数字，并且希望他们用无端的过渡（“此外……”）来填补空白，并用介绍性和结论性段落来结束两端的内容，这样看起来就很肤浅。